Oh, do I have a bone to pick with this one...
I originally picked this up because I thought it'd be a light, enchanting book to read as part of my holiday-themed reading month. (You know, snow? Eh, eh? *nudgenudge) I went in thinking this would be a fluffy, happy book, but unfortunately it had the opposite effect because this book filled me with rage from beginning to end.
I'll admit, I didn't know a whole lot going into this book—only that it's about two girls who forge a friendship at a women's writing conference in the wintertime. Wholesome, right? Wrong, because one of the girls at this conference is trans, and the entire plot revolves around this poor girl facing severe transphobia through the entirety of the book, and it's both infuriating and agonizing to read. I will say this: there is a page at the start of the book indicating trigger warnings, and everything is challenged on the page. HOWEVER, I still have a huge problem with the transphobia in this book, with the primary character in the book who is the source of the targeted hatred and bigotry, and how this is all ultimately addressed in the novel.
So let me set the stage: the two main characters, Soph and Tess, meet as roommates at the writing conference. They meet with the other girls at this conference, get to know one another, and before long they discover that one of the girls, Chris, has a personal, deep-seated vendetta against another girl Orley, who is trans. And this is where everything becomes a shit show.
Okay, Chris is actually the most miserable, spiteful piece of shit ever and deserves her own section
She starts right out of the gate being hateful and obnoxious. When everyone in the conference is introducing each other, Chris is immediately self-righteous, stating that she's a journalist as well as a feminist, determined to stand up for women's rights and their safety and fight against those who undermine it, making it very clear that she's talking about Orley, who she apparently makes her feel unsafe...SO "unsafe" that throughout the novel Chris takes great lengths in telling all the other girls at the conference that Orley is "really a guy," and glares at her, making snide comments at her at every chance she gets. (Oh, but Orley is the one who makes HER feel unsafe?)
Her hostility toward Orley is instantly very obsessive and interrogative, of course because she’s a hard-hitting “journalist” (gag) and later declares to the other girls that she’s going to write an article about what she’s witnessing at this women’s conference and submit it to feminist blogs to expose the conference for what it is. First of all, this is just laughable, and if she were to really submit that to feminist blogs, guarantee they would all respond back calling her out for being transphobic. But LOL OKAY, way to call yourself a true "feminist."
Secondly, it drove me insane throughout the novel that she repeatedly used the excuse of being a "journalist" to justify her transphobia, because she's passionate about getting to the bottom of things and finding the facts...and used this as motivation to continue to antagonize Orley. It's especially infuriating when it's clear that it's no longer about "journalism" and quickly escalates to flat-out ridicule and bullying. At one point when all the girls are making snowmen or "snowsisters," Chris takes the carrot off of Orley's snowsister and places it lower so that it looks like a penis. Yes, excellent conductive journalism. Also, REALLY? ARE YOU FIVE?
Throughout the rest of the novel, Chris REFUSES to believe that she's doing anything wrong, because it's wrong that she has to room with a guy and she needs to get down to the truth of why Orley thinks "he's" a girl, according to her, because apparently that's more hard-hitting journalism than, y'know, actually being open to listen to someone and respect their identity and their pronouns. Even no matter how many times people correct her and tell her Orley IS a girl—even Orley herself!—nothing gets through to her. At one point when Orley tries to express her feelings as a transwoman through poetry to everyone, Chris just walks out of the room and says "I don't need to be poetry shamed in front of everyone."
Leave it to Chris to make it all about her. Never mind the fact that she's the one who's causing all the hostility and bullying this person who so far has still done NOTHING to her besides purely existing. Chris still makes it about her own "safety" and being shamed and singled out by others and later on crying when a peer advisor confronts her about her behavior and tells her that what she's doing is wrong. Like, really? You're CRYING? Oh poor Chris, this must be so hard on YOU. 🙄 Can't even imagine what it's like for this other girl who's life you haven't stopped making into a living hell since you met her. Like, literally NO. You do not get to cry for being a bigoted, hateful human being because no one else will join in with you. (Did I mention how much I hate this character!?)
The worst part about this highly transphobic character, though, is that throughout the novel one of the main characters, Tess, sways between showing indifference to Chris rather than standing up to Orley (because it's not her place and she doesn't want to get involved. Pfft) and at times even sympathizing with her and trying to make her feel included. Despite the fact that Chris is incredibly hateful toward Orley and tries her hardest to make her feel excluded. Like, really? You wouldn't sympathize with someone who was being racist, so how should this be any different? That's also giving that bigoted person the benefit of the doubt, giving them reassurance that their behavior is being tolerated and that at least one person will stick up for them. I get that this novel was trying to take a different approach and bridge the gap between people with different viewpoints, but Chris's behavior is a whole other level than just "I don't understand your identity." I'm sorry, but if someone is being actively hateful and prejudiced against another person, that person has immediately lost the right to feeling more included in the group. None of this "we all have different beliefs and need to get along regardless" bullshit, because trans peoples' existence is not up for debate, and being hateful toward trans people is not something that deserves to be chalked up to just "having different opinions," and respecting them.
Oh, and the topper: the conflict never truly ends up getting resolved? Like, it basically ends with Chris and Orley being put in a room together, Orley saying her final piece and putting Chris in her place, and Chris still being a pretty awful person—and still making it about her—and then it sort of just fizzles out and that's the end? There's the beginning of hope for Chris as she admits she's been researching about trans people (literally why couldn't you do that from the beginning?? That could've solved ALL your problems and concerns you held. Shows what a great journalist you are...) but she's still very imperfect and obviously has a long way to go. After what transpired throughout the whole novel, I was at least expecting a stronger resolution... but nope! We get Chris's half-assed apology and vague sense of character growth. Cool, glad I endured all that bullying and childish behavior for that!
Okay, so leaving the whole Chris the Transphobe behind (and erasing it permanently from my memory, I beg you), that's surprisingly not the only aspect of this novel where characters are less than perfect on the LGBTQ front. Take Soph for example. She's very out and gay...and yet she's also somehow the most oblivious lesbian ever??
- It's laughable how naive Soph is a lot of the time. When Tess tells her how Joey got his jaw broken for being gay, Soph says, "Tess, he needs to tell someone. It's against the law to hit someone." (LMAO)
- Also can we discuss how Soph is supposedly this super out and proud lesbian yet she doesn't know the fucking basics of coming out? Soph is adamant throughout the novel that it would be much better for everyone to be out and she has a seriously hard time grasping why some people would choose not to come out yet. Like, is she really so clueless that she can't possibly understand that not all places across the country are safe places to be out and gay? Or even that coming out is an incredibly personal decision that only that person can make for themselves? Seriously, how is she gay and also this dumb!
Ultimately, what I get out of this book and what it very much reads like is almost a Teachable Novel on how to be a good LGBTQ ally. To the point where a lot of the writing and the characters put in place feel stilted and unnatural, like they're more or less there just as a formula to create this overarching novel of various LGBTQ issues that are honestly very basic concepts and that I would think people in 2018 would already know. I'm also at this point where I no longer need "teachable" LGBT books.
Yes, I know that blatant transphobia and ignorance exists in the world—that doesn't mean I want a book full of it just so that I can reach the end and have the characters somewhat experience growth and learn their lesson. Those types of stories are no longer nearly as fulfilling as the ones where characters already come equipped with common sense and unwavering respect and support for others. In this way, this book feels immensely lacking and honestly pretty behind in its time. Especially since the transphobic plot line took up a large portion of this book, only for it to reach a very flimsy, not well deserved resolution, this is what made me lose the remaining respect I had for this book and ultimately led me to lower my rating to one star.
Other things:
- Dialogue isn't always the best.
- The writing has moments of being weak as well, like random exclamation marks and reading as somewhat stilted.
- For how central of a character Orley is, I feel like I don't truly know her character at all...which is a shame because I want to love Orley! But she just reads as flat and one-dimensional, not quite a fully fleshed out character.
- I didn't see it coming at all when Tess kissed Soph, because truthfully? I didn't sense any chemistry between them AT ALL. Like, not even a hint of, "Hm, this could happen." And not in a good way either? Like, it wasn't a good surprise, but more like a, "Wha--oh?? Huh??" I needed there to be at least some subtext of romantic tension and Tess being gay.