Women are bombarded with ideas of perfection--and tips for how to achieve it--every day. From her work to her looks to her parenting, today's modern woman is expected to strive to be picture perfect in every way. As a result, calls for authenticity and imperfection are on the rise. Yet, deep down, most of us still want to achieve perfection. Why?The desire to be perfect, says Kim Hyland, is actually a God-given urge. After all, we were made for Eden. But there is a difference between perfection and perfectionism, which is our attempt to achieve perfection on our own, by our own strength, and for our own purposes--the original temptation in the Garden. In this freeing book, Hyland offers women a stirring manifesto for acknowledging their limitations and embracing the perfection of God through his grace. This is a book for every woman who gives 110% and yet feels shame when one little thing goes wrong.
Kim Hyland is a writer, a speaker, and the founder and host of Winsome, an annual retreat for women that celebrates authenticity, diversity, and truth. She also speaks at national retreats and conferences, where she encourages women by sharing her imperfect path and God's perfect plans. Originally from the DC metro area, she now lives with her family on a mountain overlooking the Shenandoah Valley in Virginia. Connect with Kim at WinsomeLiving.com.
An Imperfect Woman is a much needed reminder that purpose and meaning don't depend on my performance. God has much bigger plans for my life and my soul than looking good and doing good. The good news is that when I reject doing things perfect in front of people and turn to God for His never ending grace I learn to embrace humility, forgiveness, true peace and grand eternal destinies, which are only some of the helpful reminders of Kim's "An Imperfect Woman's Manifesto". This book is like a map tracing the way back to the Grace of God and His beautiful plan for our souls. Saturated with truth, personal stories and words of freedom "An Imperfect Woman" is a must read for anyone who struggles with carrying the burdens of life on your own, because, "…nothing is big enough to hold your identity as a creation of the eternal creator. You have been designed to find yourself in Christ." Pg. 150 -I received this book from the publisher in exchange for my honest review. The views expressed in my review are all my own.
Kim Hyland is my friend, and the first time I had the opportunity to sit with her one-on-one, she spoke three messages directly into my spirit, and one of them unlocked my breath. I had been panting for 3.5 years.
I'm ashamed to admit, therefore, that I really didn't expect to find An Imperfect Woman nearly so relevant to my life. I expected it to be more about the drive to have a perfect body or house, and if anything, I feel convicted to try a little harder in these areas. (If I "let go" further, I might blow up or die in my hoard.)
But while I think An Imperfect Woman will speak to a woman caught up in appearances, the book goes much deeper and, in fact, includes the very message that restored my breath. The overarching theme is that we are not in control and that this reality, while sobering, is blessed...because God IS in control, and He is capable of so much more than we.
This book met me where I am as a woman who struggles with anxiety, an absence of peace, and fear over/for my children. I can't recommend it more highly. I'd thought I might pass it on, but nope. (Sorry, Mom.) I'm going to keep it close at hand so I can revisit it over and over.
I received An Imperfect Woman from the publisher in exchange for my honest review. The views expressed in this review are all my own.
Kim has such a humble heart as she shares her stories, all while pointing to God. As women we all struggle in different areas, but thankfully we have a God that has overcome. Kim helps us to see His promises, goodness, grace, and the power the gospel gives us to overcome our imperfect parts. Though we will never be perfect here on earth, but we can live in peace with God's truths and His transforming power.
An Imperfect Woman is a lovely and insightful read that is full of scripture. Hyland has written a heartfelt read that gets to the heart of the matter. Many woman face anxiety and the struggles to be perfect on a daily basis. This book is the perfect read letting you know that you are not alone.
This book spoke right to my try-hard soul. Hyland's writing is beautiful, thoughtful, and transparent. So grateful for this gem of a book. This resource provides understanding for perfectionists and points them to a more hopeful way of living.
*Disclosure- I received this book as a part of Baker Books Bloggers. All opinions are my own.*
When I read the title of this book, I thought, “Hmmm, did I write this?”. It was meant for me. I’ve been feeling like I HAVE to have it all together all of the time. And as we know, that is very much NOT the case. Once I cracked open the cover and began to dive between the pages, there was so much truth that I needed to hear- so I had to share some of those truths with you.
“…the reality is that when I refuse to address anxiety, I surrender ground. Anxiety thrives in the darkness of denial. But when I face anxiety with the light of truth, it runs.”
I’ve shared my struggles with anxiety on multiple occasions. Kim Hyland totally hit the nail on the head. I fought with my anxiety for a long time. Tried to ignore it, tried to shove it down deep. And it only festered and got worse. Not until I acknowledged it, sought others who’ve been through it, and prayed continuously about it, did I feel any relief.
I’m not perfect. I suffer from anxiety. But, that doesn’t mean I am unloved. I am not alone. And just like Kim points out, “[God’s] power and presence are our ultimate security.” I have no reason to fear! She really helped me to realize that I don’t have to seek perfection. No one is perfect, and I don’t have to be feel bad for being me.
She also pointed out a trend that I’ve been noticing more and more each day-
“Quite often, our idols pose as ideals. They come in every shape and size. Ideals are what sell our books and determine our culture’s trends. They promise health, knowledge, beauty, esteem, security, confidence, happiness, and more.”
I can easily turn the things that I’m seeking from ideals to idols. She reminds us that idols don’t serve us, they rather enslave us. They become more important than everything. Whether that be goals that I’ve set, or time I spend doing things that maybe I shouldn’t be doing. These idols can be anything, even things that are good- we can turn them into things we seek before God, and then they become detrimental to us.
Back to that pesky anxiety. And fear. She was speaking directly to me when she said this:
“Of course we work hard at being safe. But when safety becomes the filter through which we make all our decisions, we not only eliminate a risk but also eliminate opportunity and purpose…The most rewarding and purposeful parts of your life were most likely also the riskiest- sports, competitions, auditions, tests, college and job applications, marriage, childbirth. Almost everything we work hard for entails great risk. The risk and even the danger are what makes it rare, worthy, and of value.”
I spend a ridiculous amount of time avoiding the things that scare me. I could easily lock myself away and never put myself out there. How much will I miss out on if I am unwillingly to take risks?
I met my best friend because I went to a Book Club with no one I knew.
I went on a date with a friend even though I was terrified, and I ended up marrying him!
I struggled with infertility and loss for years before finally getting our precious son.
I took a chance and wrote down my thoughts, and now I get to share my blog and so many wonderful things with you.
ALL scary things. But, they’re also some of the GREATEST things in my life!
The truths in this book, that Kim spoke right to me, have really helped me see some changes I want to make in my life. I’m embracing my imperfections and letting go of my weakness. I’m tearing down my idols and replacing them with the heavenly Father.
I’m a big fan of brave women who are willing to admit they aren’t perfect.
Kim Hyland is one of those brave women. In her first book, she speaks about letting go of perfect ideals as a woman, wife, and parent. I enjoyed her humble perspective and her self-effacing humor. She even puts poems at the beginning of some chapters, which wins points for me as a poet. She tells story after story about how she let go of perfectionism and let God heal her.
The scene that stands out most to me in the book is when she took her young son to the doctor to have a tick removed. She had to help restrain her young son, along with a nurse, while the doctor extracted the danger.
Her young son looked up at her in fear and childhood ignorance. She knew what she was doing had to be done, even though his cries of “It hurts, Mama, it hurts!” over and over broke her heart. After the ordeal was finished, she held him and rocked him. He still said, “It hurt, Mama, it hurt,” over and over.
She realized that his cries were just like her cries to God. God sometimes doesn’t remove our pain. He may feel far away and unkind in our moments of suffering. But He’s there all the time, watching over us as imperfect women. He has a good plan in place, even when we don’t understand why the pain is necessary. He allows the pain for our greater good. All He asks is that we cry out to Him for help. He also wants us to tell him our hurts, even after they are over. He wants us to know Him in close relationship. Kim’s book affirms these truths in an honest voice.
Quotes I enjoyed from An Imperfect Woman: - Abba is the Jewish word for daddy. This is the image of a beloved daughter who cries out in humility and weakness, but in power too because of the strength of her daddy. - Why is it so easy to slip back into perfectionism? It is because we are made for Eden. Our hearts are forever longing to return to that place of perfection. - Only Jesus can satisfy our hearts’ longing for perfection. But it takes a humility that is willing to forsake our pride and its many manifestations. - As I tried so hard to live up to a constantly changing standard of perfection, I forgot my true end as a wife and mom: becoming a woman of peace who both enjoyed and reflected the love and grace of God to her family. - Entrusting ourselves wholeheartedly to a sovereign God we can’t even see, much less comprehend, is a lifelong process. It’s hard, but it’s our surest hope for security.
Right now Kim is hosting a 4-week book study in a Facebook group. I like getting to know her better through that group. You can watch a preview video and join the group here.
Thank you to Netgalley for a free preview copy of this book.
So many women struggle with the strong desire to be the perfect something - the perfect woman, the perfect wife, the perfect mom - while losing sight of the fact that we are all perfectly as God would have us be at any given moment. The trials and hardships and seeming setbacks that we go through are all a means to an end, a way that God can work in our lives to teach us, show us, and mold us more into what He calls us to be.
In An Imperfect Woman: Letting Go Of The Need To Have It All Together, Kim Hyland shares her personal testimony of learning to move past her personal need for perfection and into God's loving arms of grace. Revealing deeply personal yet very relatable tales of shortcomings and pitfalls from her own life story, Kim walks us through a journey of learning to let go of perfectionism, pride, and anxiety in order to embrace grace, humility, and peace.
Each chapter is composed of several short stories that beautifully flow together into a tapestry, slowly revealing that we are each a masterpiece in God's eyes. This makes it easy to take in just a few minutes at a time, easily fitting it into any schedule. Her light-hearted yet candid approach to dealing with serious topics is sure to strike a chord in even the most imperfect and self-declared "failures" among us - something I know all too well.
While this book is mostly a memoir, each chapter ends with questions for reflection in order to help the reader apply Kim's experiences to her own life and her own journey to indulge in and share God's grace. I would recommend it to any woman who finds herself questioning her own value, her purpose in God's great plan, or her ability to adequately care for and be an example to those she loves. 5/5 stars.
*Disclaimer: I received a complimentary print copy of this book from the publisher, Baker Books, for the purpose of this honest review. All opinions are my own.*
I have to be honest when I say that I didn't think I needed this book. I knew I was imperfect and often a big hot mess. Then one evening I was thinking about how I needed to get my home in order so my marriage, family, kids, etc. would be better. I needed to plan better, I needed to serve more, do more....my list was truly endless. As I was reading this book, An Imperfect Woman, I realized that I was striving in my own power and strength to become what I thought I needed to be, rather than allowing God to make me into what He wanted me to be. I appreciated how Kim explains that our longings for perfection are because we were made for Eden. "We embark on a futile yet relentless pursuit of our legitimate, yet God given desire for Eden and its perfection, wondering why nothing quite satisfies our hearts. And perfectionism takes root." I have already marked my book up quite a bit and I am excited to delve deeper into the truths of the Gospel in a book study later this month.
The book is set up following An Imperfect Woman's Manifesto. These statements are carried throughout the book and tie it together seamlessly. At the end of the chapters are Questions for Reflection. I think these would lend themselves very well for a book study and also for personal reflection. I appreciated the number of quotes, scripture references and even original poetry that is woven in this book. Many parts of the book brought fresh conviction through the work of the Holy Spirit, tears, laughter & deep contemplation. I think any woman, at any stage in her walk with Christ, would glean many benefits from this book.
The struggle with perfectionism is alive and well in the hearts of so many women these days and I am no exception. When I heard about Kim's book An Imperfect Woman I knew that it was something that I had to read. The first chapter had me in tears, reading another woman's story that so mirrored my own caused a wash of feelings. But this book is one filled with hope. Kim weaves her own personal stories with those of the Bible, reminding us that as long as the world has existed, humans have struggled with this "not enough" feeling. I loved this truth early on..."Eve didn't think she was better than God....she just believed the lie that she needed more than God. He wasn't enough." How often do we believe that lie, and oh the rabbit trails those lies take us down! Each chapter ends with some questions for reflection, some opportunities to look deeper into those struggles you may be facing and find freedom from them. An Imperfect Woman is a must-have for every woman that has struggled to do more, be more, present well, parent perfectly and appear to have it all together. It is a chance to take a deep breath and remind ourselves that we can let all of that go. Get this book today!!
"An Imperfect Woman" is where God's grace and truth meets women in the point of their need. It is where we can say we are broken, we don't have to be perfect and we can lay it before the feet of Jesus. All of our failure, frustrations, and the things that don't make us whole, he invites us to bring to him, where He will make us complete. This book is like drinking coffee with a friend who is safe, warm and welcoming. I love the message of HOPE she brings for a person like me who is always striving in performance when Jesus never asked us to perform. This book was great for me and I will read it again. If you've ever struggled with perfectionism or anxiety, you will like this book alike, not because it's easy, but because the power of Christ in you, is at work and this book makes that message clear. This is a message that everyone woman needs to hear not just once, but in multiple seasons of their lives. I really connected with this book and found Biblical application. I give this book 5/5 stars.
“An Imperfect Woman” by Kim Hyland is just that book I needed to read. I have always suffered from perfectionism and am always comparing myself to others. Kim offered so many good words of advice on this subject and reminded me of things I already knew but forgot! Kim shows us how there is a difference between perfection and perfectionism. Perfectionism is our attempt to achieve perfection on our own strength. She shows us how to achieve perfection through God’s grace. I love how she uses the Garden of Eden, and how it all started with Eve not being satisfied to be in the beautiful Garden of Eden. I never thought of it like that.
I would definitely recommend this book to any woman struggling with perfectionism, which is probably most of us! This book really puts things in prospective and frees us of perfectionism, which is really paralyzing!
I received this book from Baker Books for my honest opinion.
In a perfect world, I would possess the power (aka – control) to keep my loved ones safe from all hurts and difficulties.
But I don’t live in a perfect world, nor am I a perfect woman. It does not take much for me to go down the slippery slope from anxiety to fear.
Yet the reality is there truly is not a single thing I can do to keep all of them safe at all times.
"...our reality is that we are not alone! Jesus is Emmanuel, God with us, His power and presence are our ultimate security. His love for us is sure and has been proven." (page 77)
This book brings much needed words of life and breath. Each chapter holds a message every woman needs to be encouraged, and reminded, the struggle is real but we need not face it alone. It’s truly a must read for every woman.
**I received this book from the publisher in exchange for my honest review. The views expressed in my review are my own.
An Imperfect Woman: Letting Go of the Need to Have it All Together is a relatable Christian self-help book by Kim Hyland. The book is a valuable one, touching upon the struggles women often go through and helping women to draw closer to God. It’s the kind of book you might read one evening while sipping a cup of tea (which is fitting, since the cover of the book actually has a stack of three cups of tea). Each chapter felt like its own daily devotional. My favorite chapter was “Ideal or Idol?” – especially the section that talked about hope. I also really liked the thoughtful reflection questions at the end of each chapter. The book includes a nice mix of Hyland’s personal story and her analyzation of the Scripture.
An Imperfect Woman is one of those books that will go on my shelf in the must-read-again row. I've often (read: every single day of my life) struggled with holding myself to standards and expectations that are impossible to reach, forgetting to lean into and embrace the grace I've been given. Kim shares real, sometimes-raw stories, always weaving them with Scripture, to remind us that in Him and through His strength, we are enough...just as we are. Kim's authentic, real walk with Christ is reflected in these pages, and her message challenges me to grow deeper in my own walk, remembering that living out my faith and identity in Him is a daily choice. I'm grateful for her words, and I know this book will be a blessing to anyone who reads it.
What an amazing book! The author gives women permission to not be perfect because “maybe my despised imperfections had the potential to become something of beauty.” I loved how the author wove stories from her own life with Biblical principles and Bible verses to create a book to encourage women. Kim, the author, writes from her heart, sharing her struggles – “Sometimes I forget and see only my and others failures and shortcomings. But when I remember we are created for eternity, I can see the potential and opportunity in conflicts.”
It felt so good to read this book – wish it had been written sooner! I recommend it! I received a copy of this book from the publisher. I am freely writing a review - all thoughts and opinions are my own.
Kim Hyland's An Imperfect Woman was a timely read for me as I am entering motherhood. I appreciated Kim's vulnerability and courage in sharing personal stories, especially those related to striving for perfection as a parent. As someone who is tempted toward perfectionism, I found many of her learnings and scripture offerings to be a wonderful reminder. The heavy use of scripture references can sometimes take away from the flow of the stories. Overall, I'd recommend this book if you are looking for honest stories and beautiful reminders from biblical scripture to embrace the perfection of God.
This was an inspirit book writing and compelling to read with also had a message from the Author of this book to sharing from her experiences through a remarkable story from a part of her life that we are all had same bind as her from perfectionism, comparison, performance to become and see more clearly with this will helping to everyone to be a better understand and embrace in gospel freedom. I highly recommend to everyone must to read this book. “ I received complimentary a copy of this book from Baker Books Bloggers program for this review “.
That desire for perfection? It’s not unfounded. Eden is in your DNA. But too often we attempt to return on our own strength. God’s amazing design is that in our weakness, we find His strength. So embrace those broken and imperfect places, because those are just where God can show up and show you everything you knew you were made for. This book has been hugely instrumental in my life. So much so that my book group is now going through it. Kim is an amazing writer and explains deep theological concepts in easy to understand ways.
Breaking the shallowness of many a Christian women's book, Kim digs deep. One of the things I appreciate most about this book is the sound theological foundation on which a pertinent struggle is addressed. This read is meaningful, sweet, genuine, and captivating as you are weaved gently through Kim's personal experiences and the truth of God's Word and His powerful gospel. I'll be revisiting An Imperfect Woman often as the reminder is one we women need again and again! Thank you Kim!
Holy Imperfection ...the ugliness of grief and grit and of rebloom on the threshing floor of suicide loss and domino effect of family estrangement . Do I need to travel perfectly in the valley of comparison and sorrows? No , for my Lord goes ahead of me to sturdy the ground . He goes with me so I'll not walk nor weep alone. Now...that's holy perfection . I can because He did ! Kim's book was a necessary nugget for regrowth for me. I pray this for you too! Grace in the grit ❤
I am so enjoying digging in to Kim Hyland’s new book, “An Imperfect Woman.” I can so easily fall into the trap of perfection and performance-based striving in my day to day life. Kim has so eloquently lead me to understand, by reading this book, through God’s Word and in her vulnerable sharing, that perfection is a God-given desire. That desire can only be truly satisfied through embracing God’s perfection by incorporating the Gospel into my days. The anxiety, and discontentment I feel when I strive comes when I’m trying too hard on my own, in my own strength. It’s never enough to achieve the perfection my heart longs for. Kim carries a freedom message through “An Imperfect Woman”, it’s a message that so many of us need to hear. It’s letting go of the need to have it all together. That’s the refreshment my heart needs!
Enjoyed how she wrote about going the steps of faith. Her writing was smooth and beautiful. She gives me hope while I make my through my faith, will be on shelf. Highy recommend .