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Why Do You Wear a Cheap Watch?

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'It was what we call in the trade a potato...' Tales of low-lifes and grifters trying to make ends meet in pre-War Germany. Penguin fifty new books celebrating the pioneering spirit of the iconic Penguin Modern Classics series, with each one offering a concentrated hit of its contemporary, international flavour. Here are authors ranging from Kathy Acker to James Baldwin, Truman Capote to Stanislaw Lem and George Orwell to Shirley Jackson; essays radical and inspiring; poems moving and disturbing; stories surreal and fabulous; taking us from the deep South to modern Japan, New York's underground scene to the farthest reaches of outer space.

50 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 1931

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About the author

Hans Fallada

217 books768 followers
Hans Fallada, born Rudolf Wilhelm Adolf Ditzen in Greifswald, was one of the most famous German writers of the 20th century. His novel, Little Man, What Now? is generally considered his most famous work and is a classic of German literature. Fallada's pseudonym derives from a combination of characters found in the Grimm fairy tales: The protagonist of Lucky Hans and a horse named Falada in The Goose Girl.

He was the child of a magistrate on his way to becoming a supreme court judge and a mother from a middle-class background, both of whom shared an enthusiasm for music and to a lesser extent, literature. Jenny Williams notes in her biography, More Lives than One that Fallada's father would often read aloud to his children the works authors including Shakespeare and Schiller (Williams, 5).

In 1899 when Fallada was 6, his father relocated the family to Berlin following the first of several promotions he would receive. Fallada had a very difficult time upon first entering school in 1901. As a result, he immersed himself in books, eschewing literature more in line with his age for authors including Flaubert, Dostoyevsky, and Dickens. In 1909 the family relocated to Leipzig following his father's appointment to the Imperial Supreme Court.

A rather severe road accident in 1909 (he was run over by a horse-drawn cart, then kicked in the face by the horse) and the contraction of typhoid in 1910 seem to mark a turning point in Fallada's life and the end of his relatively care-free youth. His adolescent years were characterized by increasing isolation and self-doubt, compounded by the lingering effects of these ailments. In addition, his life-long drug problems were born of the pain-killing medications he was taking as the result of his injuries. These issues manifested themselves in multiple suicide attempts. In 1911 he made a pact with his close friend, Hanns Dietrich, to stage a duel to mask their suicides, feeling that the duel would be seen as more honorable. Because of both boys' inexperience with weapons, it was a bungled affair. Dietrich missed Fallada, but Fallada did not miss Dietrich, killing him. Fallada was so distraught that he picked up Dietrich's gun and shot himself in the chest, but miraculously survived. Nonetheless, the death of his friend ensured his status as an outcast from society. Although he was found innocent of murder by way of insanity, from this point on he would serve multiple stints in mental institutions. At one of these institutions, he was assigned to work in a farmyard, thus beginning his lifelong affinity for farm culture.

While in a sanatorium, Fallada took to translation and poetry, albeit unsuccessfully, before finally breaking ground as a novelist in 1920 with the publication of his first book Young Goedeschal. During this period he also struggled with morphine addiction, and the death of his younger brother in the first World War.

In the wake of the war, Fallada worked several farmhand and other agricultural jobs in order to support himself and finance his growing drug addictions. Before the war, Fallada relied on his father for financial support while writing; after the German defeat he was no longer able, nor willing, to depend on his father's assistance. Shortly after the publication of Anton and Gerda, Fallada reported to prison in Greiswald to serve a 6-month sentence for stealing grain from his employer and selling it to support his drug habit. Less than 3 years later, in 1926, Fallada again found himself imprisoned as a result of a drug and alcohol-fueled string of thefts from employers. In February 1928 he finally emerged free of addiction.

Fallada married Suse Issel in 1929 and maintained a string of respectable jobs in journalism, working for newspapers and eventually for the publisher of his novels, Rowohlt. It is around this time that his novels became noticeably political and started to comment

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5 stars
138 (14%)
4 stars
322 (34%)
3 stars
365 (38%)
2 stars
104 (11%)
1 star
13 (1%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 106 reviews
Profile Image for Ian.
984 reviews60 followers
December 27, 2022
Anyone who has read any of the “Penguin Modern Classics” series will know the books are extremely short and are designed, in the company’s own words, to provide a “concentrated hit” of an author’s work. This one consists of 3 short stories from Hans Fallada, all written in 1931-32. Taken together they stretch to just 58 pages. This edition of course contains English translations of the German originals.

I couldn’t really relate to the title story. I found myself wondering what the point of it was. Perhaps it was meant to be humorous, but if so I think something might have been lost in the translation. Two stars for me.

The second story, War Monument or Urinal, is a satire on local politics. The hapless mayor and councillors of a North German town have to decide on a planning matter. The various political factions batter the issue back and forth, constantly changing their minds. The story obviously features the political tribes of the dying days of the Weimar Republic, but I think the scenario will be recognised by many people across the world even today. Three stars.

It wasn’t my intention to read another Christmas story this year, but it turns out that the third one in this collection, Fifty Marks and a Happy Christmas, is, as its title suggests, exactly that. It’s a matter of pure chance that I happened to pick this book up at this time of year. It’s been downloaded on my Kindle for a while so it was just as likely I would have started it in July. Anyway for me this was the best of the stories. A young newlywed couple are living hand to mouth in very straitened circumstances, and dream about a little extra money that they could use to buy themselves a few small luxuries for Christmas. A decent Christmas story that I would rate as four stars.
Profile Image for Paula Mota.
1,674 reviews567 followers
June 26, 2025
Like all stories – not just stories from small provincial towns – this one starts with nothing at all, and like all stories it comes to be enormous – especially for small provincial towns.

Escritos no início dos anos 30, estes três contos ecoam de forma mais ou menos acentuada a crise económica que a Alemanha então atravessava, mas Hans Fallada, apesar de tudo, conseguiu adicionar-lhe uma pitada de humor.

Why do You Wear a Cheap Watch? - 4*
War Monument or Urinal – 3*
50 Marks and a Merry Christmas – 4*

So I wasn’t short of work, and the dismal part was that all my activities put together barely made me enough money to keep Itzenplitz and me alive – ‘acquisitions’ was a term not known to us.
Profile Image for Lisa (NY).
2,151 reviews836 followers
September 6, 2022
[3+] I enjoyed these light-hearted, irreverent tales - although a day after reading them I barely remember why the protagonist in the first story wore a cheap watch. I am interested in reading one of Fallada's novels. - perhaps his anti-Nazi classic Alone in Berlin
Profile Image for Ray.
704 reviews155 followers
April 11, 2020
A short read for a train journey into town.

Three short stories. The best in my view is the last one - a newly married couple look forward to Xmas in inter war Germany. Money is tight and work precarious. At best, small pleasures are all they can look forward to, but even this is not guaranteed.

Simple tales well told.
Profile Image for Blair.
2,044 reviews5,873 followers
March 10, 2019
'Why Do You Wear a Cheap Watch?' (1931) starts with the narrator reporting acquaintances' surprise that he wears 'a nickel watch that cost two eighty-five, chain included, with a one-year guarantee', despite the fact that his father is a watchmaker. But, as it turns out, there's a good reason for this. Or rather a series of reasons – the narrator's story isn't quite what it seems.

'War Monument or Urinal?' (1932) is an amusing tale of petty bureaucracy in a small town. The trouble starts when a journalist proposes building a new petrol station to attract the custom of the many drivers who pass through. But this will necessitate the demolition of either a war memorial or the town's only public convenience. So begins a back-and-forth between various local figures and political representatives, with predictably inconclusive results.

'Fifty Marks and a Merry Christmas' (1932) is about a couple who write long lists of what they each want for Christmas, anticipating a bonus that will make some of these dreams a reality. But, as Christmas grows closer, it increasingly seems the longed-for bonus is unlikely to materialise. For me, this one outstayed its welcome – it takes far too long to reach a pleasant but saccharine conclusion.

I enjoyed these stories, but wouldn't rush to read more. I was expecting something different (for some reason I think I assumed, when I bought this, that it was non-fiction).

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Profile Image for Kirsty.
2,794 reviews190 followers
September 5, 2018
I have really enjoyed what I have read of Fallada's work thus far, and was therefore looking forward to Why Do You Wear a Cheap Watch?, a short story collection included in the Penguin Moderns series. These are 'darkly funny, streetwise tales of low-lifes, grifters and ordinary people trying to make ends meet in pre-war Germany.' All of the stories collected here - 'Why Do You Wear a Cheap Watch?', 'War Monument or Urinal?', and 'Fifty Marks and a Merry Christmas' - have been taken from Tales of the Underworld, which first appeared in English in 2014. All have been translated by Michael Hofmann.

I found Fallada's prose style interesting; he uses a rather conversational narrative voice, which I did not feel always worked. I must admit that I found this collection a little disappointing. The title story is a little odd, and seemed to end quite abruptly. Given the beauty of Alone in Berlin and Every Man Dies Alone, I was expecting something rather different from these short stories. Whilst they have a considerable amount to say, there is little cohesion between them. The second story is clever, and makes many comments about German politics, and I did enjoy the third, about a couple who are adamant to have the happiest Christmas they can, despite the husband not expecting payment of his yearly bonus. Why Do You Wear a Cheap Watch? isn't a bad collection by any means, but if I had come to Fallada's work with no preconceptions and read this, I can't say I'd rush to get to the rest of his oeuvre.
Profile Image for Lady Clementina ffinch-ffarowmore.
943 reviews244 followers
November 16, 2023
Why Do You Wear a Cheap Watch? proved to be a delightful and fun introduction to the writing of Hans Fallada (or Rudolf Wilhelm Friedrich Ditzen) whose only other book on my to-read list so far is the sombre and in various ways daunting, Every Man Dies Alone/Alone in Berlin. The stories that made up this little Penguin Modern volume were a completely different cup of tea, and are sure to bring a smile to your face and warm your heart.

The volume described in its blurb as ‘darkly funny streetwise tales of low-lifes, grifters and ordinary people trying to make ends meet in pre-war Germany’ comprises three stories, one from 1931 and two from 1932. In the titular, ‘Why Do You Wear a Cheap Watch?’, a young graduate questions why when his father is a leading watch maker does he have to wear a nickel watch costing two eighty-five rather than the gold watch he ought to by rights? Well, we soon learn, papa mightn’t be quite the unfair miser our narrator wants us to think him.

In ‘War Monument or Urinal?’, a small-town school teacher and part time reporter writes a piece proposing an improvement to the town after running into a policeman surveying the number of cars passing their main street. This leads to a small political storm in which he is caught, his fortunes oscillating with that of the petrol pump he had suggested the town needs. Satirical and enjoyable.

The final and longest story ‘Fifty Marks and a Merry Christmas’ on the other hand is absolutely lovely and heartwarming. A newly wed couple, who lovingly call each other Mumm and Itzenplitz, struggle to make ends meet as people in their position and time often do. But they have dreams for Christmas, wishes (allowing their dreams to fly as far as they can) that are entered on a list while what little money (and it is very little) they can save goes into a collection tin. But as Christmas approaches and their collection is still meagre, they are left wondering whether all they’ll have left is their dreams. Spoiler or not, I will say that the magic happens leaving one with a smile on one’s face, and yes, there’s a little kitten too!

Funny, charming and heartwarming, this were wonderful to read, and made a very different second pick for #GermanLitMonth. The stories are translated by Michael Hoffmann.
Profile Image for Marla'dan Alıntılar.
363 reviews50 followers
Read
October 20, 2021
"Henüz çocuğum olmadığı için açık açık söyleyebilirim: Sınavlardan vasat notlarla, ucu ucuna geçmiştim. Çocuklarım bir olsun da onlara sınavlarımı en üst dereceyle geçtiğimi, beni tebrik etmesi için Eğitim Bakanlığından bir temsilci gönderdiklerini, adamın gururdan sözleri yaşararak elim sıktığını ve “Delikanlı, bu eğitim müessesesi, kuruluşundan bu yana böyle başarı görmedi.” Dediğini söyleyeceğim."
Profile Image for Can Kayalı.
22 reviews2 followers
February 15, 2025
Fallada okumaya karar verip tuğla kalınlığında ki "Kurtlar Sofrası" ile "Ķöylüler, Kodamanlar ve Bombalar" kitaplarıyla uzun uzun bakıştıktan sonra kitaplık rafının kenarından bana sırıtan bu ince kitabı alıp bir çırpıda bitirdim.

Kitapta Fallada'nın altı kısa öyküsü var. Ben en çok Weimar Cumhuriyeti döneminde geçen Büyük Benzin Anıtı'nı sevdim. Espirili, akıcı dili ve kara mizahıyla milliyetçilik eleştirisi; okumaya doyamadım.
Profile Image for Aslıhan Çelik Tufan.
647 reviews196 followers
January 22, 2020
Sabah kahveniz eşliğinde bitirebileceğiniz, Dublinliler tadında çok güzel ve tadında bir öykü kitabı.
Nazi Almanyasının her seferinde farklı yönlerini okuyabilmek mümkün bence. En çok istediğimse Polonya ve Almanya seyahati ile yerinde görüp hissedebilmek 2020 belki bunu getirir!
Keyifli okumalar!
Profile Image for Doğan.
205 reviews13 followers
October 17, 2020
-Evlilik Yüzüğü
-Büyük Benzin Anıtı

Bu iki öykü dışında kayda değer bir öykü yok. Fallada'ya yakıştıramadığım öyküler. Romanları gibi başarılı değil.
Profile Image for Stephanie ((Strazzybooks)).
1,432 reviews113 followers
July 22, 2019
I love Hans Fallada’s writing, ever since discovering him in a German history class. His clever writing gives a unique insight into pre-WWII Germany.

" 'A new idea. You can't release something just like that. No one knows what to say, and everyone has to take a position. Have you no idea of the chaos you've created!'

He had promised the mayor - and shaken hands on it - not to have any ideas without permission, no new ones at any rate."


This beautiful little Penguin edition has three short stories, showing the absurdity and anxiety of the time. It's perfect for Fallada fans or fans of short stories.
If you’re interested in Fallada, I recommend Little Man, What Now? as your first.
Profile Image for Peter.
776 reviews137 followers
November 22, 2018
This is one of the better of the Penguin Moderns. Fallada has a very clear writing style that is easily accesible and filled with a dark humour that is a delight.

Without doubt an author that needs and deserves more attention.
Profile Image for Ruth.
106 reviews
August 8, 2023
Why do you wear a cheap watch - 2*

War monument or urinal - 3*

Fifty marks and a merry Christmas - 4*
6 reviews
August 14, 2025
Read in about 20 minutes on the tube and already forgot what happened - plus i paid £1.99 for it in an oxfam and it rrps for £1 so fuming all round
Profile Image for Elif.
1,378 reviews38 followers
July 10, 2022
Hans Fallada fazlasıyla övgülerine rastladığım ve bu sebeple merak ettiğim yazarlar arasındaydı. Elifthereader challange bir öykü kitabı kategorisi için seçtim ve kısa sürede okudum. Nazi Almanya’sında geçen öykülerden oluşuyor. Genel olarak geçim derdi, yoksulluk, işsizlik, küçük hayatlar üzerinden öyküler oluşturulmuş. 6 hikaye içerisinde 3 tanesini beğendim ki benim gibi bir öykü okuru olmayan biri için bu oran oldukça iyi sayılır. Neden Ucuz Saat Takıyorsun; kitapta neşesini koruyan ve aktarabilen bir hikaye. Bir İşe Giriyorum; işsizlikten kurtulabilmek için denemediği yol kalmayan bir adamın yaşadıklarını anlatıyor. Elli Mark ve Mutlu Bir Noel Kutlaması ise geçim sıkıntıları yaşayan evli bir çiftin hayallerini gerçekleştirebilme çabası içinde geçirdikleri yılı adeta izleten bir hikaye. Yazım tarzı oldukça sade ve ilginç bir şekilde sanki bir film gibi göz önüne gelen bir anlatıma sahip. Oturup çay kahve eşliğinde sindirilebilecek öyküler. Fallada’nın asıl olarak romanları meşhur ve mutlaka okuyacağım. Derdini iyi aktarabilen bir yazar olduğunu hissettiriyor. En çok merak ettiğim kitabı Küçük Adam Ne Oldu Sana olsa da ne yazık ki o kitabının baskısı tükenmiş. Artık diğer kitapları arasında bulabildiklerimi okuyacağım.
Profile Image for Burak Kuscu.
567 reviews126 followers
January 19, 2023
Hans Fallada'nın yazım tarzına alışmak için doğru bir kitap mı, tartışılır ama en azından insanlar Fallada okusun istediğim için tavsiye edebileceğim kesin.

Son öyküden baya etkilendim. Onun dışında vasatı pek de aşamayan öykülerden oluşuyor kitabımız. Hans Fallada benim en sevdiğim yazarlardan biri. Bu kitap, everest açıkhava serisindeki Büyük Aşk kitabı falan derken bir miktar yazara ısınabilirsiniz.

Normalde baya hacimli yazar çünkü. Birden bodoslama girmekten çekiniyor insanlar Hans Fallada külliyatına. Bana sorarsanız Köylüler Kodamanlar ve Bombalar'la başlamak en doğrusu meselâ.

Her neyse. Okunası, akıcı bir kitap ama çok çok iyi diyemem. Yazarı, kitaptan daha çok tavsiye ederim. Bununla bir başlayın, sonra yavaştan devam edersiniz.
Profile Image for Liam O'Leary.
553 reviews146 followers
December 31, 2024
Penguin Modern Boxset #34/#50

Fallada's style seems very similar but less interesting or personal to Virginia Woolf's or Clarice Lispector's writing style. Nothing stands out here, and that may be the point, but I felt no attachment or impact to any of the three stories in this Penguin Modern.

These three stories by Hans Fallada convinced me why Fallada was not included in the Germany section of the Chaotic Age of Harold Bloom's Western Canon. I can see why in comparison to the other 20th century authors writing in German he selected whom I have read (Rilke, Kafka, Hesse, Böll, Dürrenmatt) there is nothing thematically or culturally interesting in Fallada's stories to make them stand out.

The first story is about someone who keeps losing their watch and so they wear a cheap one, the second about a vote for a war monument or a urinal being placed, and the final one is about getting ingredients for Christmas dinner. They are all very banal and boring stories, and I think the aim was to show the everyday lives of German civilians during wartime was fairly boring and ordinary in some moments, but it doesn't really contrast these scenes with the alternative situation. All stories are narrated in a detached reportage that sounds like someone's 10 year-old is telling you about their day.

I appreciate that Bloom wasn't always fair or representative in his selection, and that this boxset does not represent the true caliber of writers contained in it, but even still there is enough here for me to not want to read Fallada further over say Gunter Grass or Thomas Mann.

The Penguin Modern boxset has not been indicative of good writers, but it has signalled to me authors I never hope to read again. Given its aim to promote the top 50 Twentieth-century writers, it's definitely failed, but in a continually unpredictable way...
Profile Image for James.
443 reviews
November 10, 2021
The last story was pretty cute. The first one was basically an extended joke, and the second felt like a satire on something that I didn't really understand, but I didn't have a bad time with this.
Profile Image for Melek .
416 reviews13 followers
December 31, 2022
Hans Fallada yaşadığı dönemi tüm gerçekliği ile yansıtabilen bir yazar. Öykülerinde de yazar dönemini tüm açıklığı ile yansıtmış. Severek okudum. Benim için Hans Fallada “ne yazarsa okurum” dediğim birisi.

Bu kitap için puanım 3,5!
Profile Image for Dane Cobain.
Author 22 books322 followers
July 23, 2018
This book is a fascinating insight into life in Nazi Germany before the outbreak of the Second World War. I haven’t come across many examples like this. Pretty good!
Profile Image for Armel Sourisseau.
11 reviews
December 4, 2024
Très sympa et drôle, avec beaucoup d'émotion et de personnalité mais je dois avouer que je n'ai pas tout saisi. le fait que ça ait été une lecture de métro n'a sans doute pas aidé.
Profile Image for Orlaith.
239 reviews5 followers
April 7, 2018
A darkly funny Fallada taster with just the right touch of wit and characterisation. if you liked "Alone in Berlin" try these 3 short stories
Profile Image for Hikaoru.
952 reviews25 followers
March 22, 2019
I enjoyed the first two stories but the third bores me. Maybe because it's just a story about a couple tryna make ends meet and that's just, well, nothing special about it.

Although, in the first story, my friend says it reminds her of me. And I was like I wasn't that bad, aren't I? I never lie about losing my stuff to my mum. The audacity. *hands to the forehead like a lady in distress*
Profile Image for 일리아나.
17 reviews2 followers
May 19, 2021
Quite the peculiar little booklet. Fallada has such a colloquial and interesting style but boy oh boy, you get lost in his sentences sometimes. A quick read but definitely not an easy one. Dark humour, yes, but also a lot of innuendos about the rumours of pre-war Germany. Interesting to say the least, 'Now is your time to talk.'
Profile Image for Ramona Cantaragiu.
1,555 reviews29 followers
August 2, 2022
I've read Fallada's Every Man Dies Alone and I was pleasantly surprised that he can also do a lighthearted even tongue in cheek style, but the stories were either too bogged down in details about pre-war German politics or dragged on far too much for me to actually care or get a genuine enjoyment from them.
Profile Image for Royce.
422 reviews
February 27, 2023
Although I have only read only one book written by Hans Fallada, “Everyone Dies Alone,” I am uncertain how fair my comparison is. Yet, the first essay/short story in the Penguin class titled “Why Do You Wear a Cheap Watch?” is lighthearted and entertaining. The direct writing style I really like is present. For those readers who have never read Hans Fallada, I recommend you start here.
Profile Image for Alisa.
1,487 reviews71 followers
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July 6, 2025
I liked "Why do you wear a cheap watch?" Because that is exactly my philosophy ;) if someone wants to rob me, it will definitely not be worth their while lol. Good luck getting my nokia to do anything, it is slower than a granny in traffic.

The other stories were kind of boring but I am guessing the people of that time and place would have recognized themselves and their neighbors and thought the humor was good. I did like the gregarious writing style.
Profile Image for Ori.
10 reviews
September 6, 2025
MUY divertido y gracioso, me ha gustado mucho, sobretodo el último cuento "Fifty Marks and a Merry Christmas", de mis favoritos aunque no fuese el más gracioso de todos, te muestra lo cotidiano con una sencillez y veracidad en sus palabras que te cautiva en la lectura además de echarte unas risas a la par :)

Gracias por el regalo Lou, me ha gustado mucho!
Profile Image for Electra.
636 reviews53 followers
December 30, 2020
L’idée m’était venue d’acheter ces petites éditions Penguin pour découvrir ces auteurs avant d’acheter leurs romans. Hans Fallada m’a totalement séduite avec ces trois petites nouvelles drôles et piquantes à souhait. A lire !
Displaying 1 - 30 of 106 reviews

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