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The Pendant Path
Kenji Okado has a secret. Trained since birth to be the ultimate weapon against a threat that might not even exist, he is struggling to navigate high school. His world changes for the better when popular student Hyrum Decker becomes his lab partner, but little does Kenji realize how his newfound friendship will be tested when he and Hyrum discover the hidden potential of a family heirloom.
Elsie, an apprentice clockmaker, is struggling to achieve Journeyman status in a place where being half British isn’t an asset. Recently, she can’t shake the feeling that someone is watching her. But that’s the least of her problems, now that her brother Xan has stolen a priceless artifact from the local crime lord.
Two teenagers. Two parallel worlds. Destined never to meet until they stumble upon the secret of the pendant path.
Elsie, an apprentice clockmaker, is struggling to achieve Journeyman status in a place where being half British isn’t an asset. Recently, she can’t shake the feeling that someone is watching her. But that’s the least of her problems, now that her brother Xan has stolen a priceless artifact from the local crime lord.
Two teenagers. Two parallel worlds. Destined never to meet until they stumble upon the secret of the pendant path.
379 pages, Kindle Edition
Published January 1, 2017
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August 8, 2018
I received this as review request and it's also been entered into SPFBO4 in The Alliterates grouping. As I said in my intro to SPFBO, there are some books entered into this year's contest that were requests of mine before it was official there was even going to be an SPFBO. These reviews aren't meant to step on toes or make any kind of statement - just fulfilling a personal request.
Pendant Path starts out with Kenji's POV, he's a 17-year-old Japanese immigrant living in San Antonio. He wakes up early in the morning in a very small and sparsely decorated room. He's sleeping on a mattress on the floor with dollar store curtains that can't keep the sunlight out of the room. His first experience of the day is a struggle with a flood of emotions as he tries to keep himself together - it's hinted that it could be dangerous for himself or others if he loses control. Once he has himself together he's a very different person. It's apparent he's a character that focuses on control and discipline. He goes through a very rigid and self-inflicted routine each morning and keeps himself nice and cleanly dressed. There's a little bit of mystery revolving around his background and his father - he and his father have been on the run, never living anywhere for more than six months at a time. I won't go into why since it's left as kind of a teaser/mystery for the first quarter of the story until Kenji spills his guts to his friend. It's left him an outcast and he preferred to keep it that way until he met his first and only friend, Hyrum, who was assigned to him as a lab partner. Both of Kenji's parents are dead, his father died recently and it weighs heavily on his mind. They didn't have the most healthy of relationships, it wasn't abusive but it wasn't a great dynamic - Kenji didn't receive any love, affection, or sympathy growing up and it still messes with him from time to time. But, since they moved so frequently he was all Kenji had left and his absence feels like a hole in his life. It's a mystery even to Kenji how his mother died because his father refused to speak about it. One of the only things he has left of his mother is a pendant that was left behind, nothing more than that, not even a picture. After he trusts his friend enough to tell him the truth about what's going on in his life, his friend picks up his mother's pendant out of curiosity and it gets exposed to light - something his mother had told him never to do. A mirror in the room starts to glow after the pendant is exposed to sunlight, and it reveals the second character that's been alternating with Kenji's chapters up to that point, a young girl named Elsie.
Elsie is an apprentice watchmaker and a British immigrant in a place called Sloughbank. She feels somewhat out of place since everyone around her looks at her differently for being half British. She doesn't have a lot of money, her family is poor and just getting by. She's been apprenticing for a while and is starting on her journeyman's project, a very old and rare glyph clock that's her bosses family heirloom. She gets the feeling she's being watched but isn't sure what it is until one day a hand pops through the mirror in her workshop and startles her. She doesn't know if she's going insane, or if her mirror is possessed by demons. A few days later, her brother comes bursting into the workshop looking for a place to hide, followed closely by a woman named Ixtab who wants him dead. Her brother stole something from a nobles house and they're determined to get it back.
Meanwhile, back in San Antonio Kenji and Hyrum are watching Elsie and her brother get assaulted by people who look like they're going to murder them. Before Kenji could form a plan, his friend Hyrum rushes through the mirror to try and help. Elsie makes a plea for them to continue to help her because she's in over her head and doesn't know what else to do with her brother's situation.
Kenji's chapters give no hint at magic until 20% in when they discover a hidden use for his mother's pendant, in Elsie's chapters it's clear right away. Having a mild magical talent is called your "Affinity", they work kind of like Knacks from Benedict Patrick's world. Small skills that are greatly enhanced by a magical innate ability. Elsie's Affinity is knowing how things fit together, so once I learned that it was easy to figure out why she chose to be a watchmaker.
As far as the pacing is concerned, the first 20% of Kenji's storyline is character background and set up the brand new friendship between himself and his lab partner, and all you know about Elsie is that she's a watchmaker. So the beginning was a bit slower, but once you hit that 20% mark everything comes together.
The world building was kind of confusing for Elsie's beginning chapters because I kept thinking she must be in the past, their city just got their first radio after all - but little things kept hinting that she wasn't. The technology and culture weren't totally consistent with 1895, so once I found out she wasn't really in the past but in an alternate reality, things made a little more sense.
The writing was very to the point as is typical for YA genre, this is definitely not a flowery or overly descriptive book which helped speed the story along. However, there was a bit of telling instead of showing which is also something I tend to see in the YA genre.
Personal Enjoyment
So, there were some things I liked about the book and others that didn't work so well for me. I liked the more light-hearted tone of this, and once the pacing got going it did flow pretty well. I do like seeing diversity in fantasy, and I can tell the authors really love Japanese culture, however, it was pretty heavy handed with Asian stereotypes. I was reading through the first chapter describing Kenji's morning routine and his home and I felt it was a bit overdone. However, I'm not familiar with the Japanese culture, or how they try and adapt to American culture. So, I decided to ask some of my friends who are Asian and have a much better perspective than myself. All of them read the first chapter and were genuinely upset. Instead of having Kenji's culture shown as background helping paint a subtle picture, his culture was sort of shoved in your face and shown as window dressings - eating with chopsticks, morning routine training with katana's, and using foreign words like "Tatami" to describe normal things like a floor mat instead of just describing it. When a culture is shown to be exotic rather than natural it can come off the wrong way. There were many small things that by themselves wouldn't have been anything to complain about, but when looked at as a whole can paint a stereotypical picture that isn't meant to be hurtful/frustrating but can be.
Audience:
Multi pov
female pov
urban fantasy
portal fantasy
light reads
YA
Ratings:
Plot: 9.5/15
Characters: 8/15
World Building: 9/15
Writing: 9/15
Pacing: 11/15
Originality: 9/15
Personal Enjoyment: 5/10
Final Score: 60.5/100
Pendant Path starts out with Kenji's POV, he's a 17-year-old Japanese immigrant living in San Antonio. He wakes up early in the morning in a very small and sparsely decorated room. He's sleeping on a mattress on the floor with dollar store curtains that can't keep the sunlight out of the room. His first experience of the day is a struggle with a flood of emotions as he tries to keep himself together - it's hinted that it could be dangerous for himself or others if he loses control. Once he has himself together he's a very different person. It's apparent he's a character that focuses on control and discipline. He goes through a very rigid and self-inflicted routine each morning and keeps himself nice and cleanly dressed. There's a little bit of mystery revolving around his background and his father - he and his father have been on the run, never living anywhere for more than six months at a time. I won't go into why since it's left as kind of a teaser/mystery for the first quarter of the story until Kenji spills his guts to his friend. It's left him an outcast and he preferred to keep it that way until he met his first and only friend, Hyrum, who was assigned to him as a lab partner. Both of Kenji's parents are dead, his father died recently and it weighs heavily on his mind. They didn't have the most healthy of relationships, it wasn't abusive but it wasn't a great dynamic - Kenji didn't receive any love, affection, or sympathy growing up and it still messes with him from time to time. But, since they moved so frequently he was all Kenji had left and his absence feels like a hole in his life. It's a mystery even to Kenji how his mother died because his father refused to speak about it. One of the only things he has left of his mother is a pendant that was left behind, nothing more than that, not even a picture. After he trusts his friend enough to tell him the truth about what's going on in his life, his friend picks up his mother's pendant out of curiosity and it gets exposed to light - something his mother had told him never to do. A mirror in the room starts to glow after the pendant is exposed to sunlight, and it reveals the second character that's been alternating with Kenji's chapters up to that point, a young girl named Elsie.
Elsie is an apprentice watchmaker and a British immigrant in a place called Sloughbank. She feels somewhat out of place since everyone around her looks at her differently for being half British. She doesn't have a lot of money, her family is poor and just getting by. She's been apprenticing for a while and is starting on her journeyman's project, a very old and rare glyph clock that's her bosses family heirloom. She gets the feeling she's being watched but isn't sure what it is until one day a hand pops through the mirror in her workshop and startles her. She doesn't know if she's going insane, or if her mirror is possessed by demons. A few days later, her brother comes bursting into the workshop looking for a place to hide, followed closely by a woman named Ixtab who wants him dead. Her brother stole something from a nobles house and they're determined to get it back.
Meanwhile, back in San Antonio Kenji and Hyrum are watching Elsie and her brother get assaulted by people who look like they're going to murder them. Before Kenji could form a plan, his friend Hyrum rushes through the mirror to try and help. Elsie makes a plea for them to continue to help her because she's in over her head and doesn't know what else to do with her brother's situation.
Kenji's chapters give no hint at magic until 20% in when they discover a hidden use for his mother's pendant, in Elsie's chapters it's clear right away. Having a mild magical talent is called your "Affinity", they work kind of like Knacks from Benedict Patrick's world. Small skills that are greatly enhanced by a magical innate ability. Elsie's Affinity is knowing how things fit together, so once I learned that it was easy to figure out why she chose to be a watchmaker.
As far as the pacing is concerned, the first 20% of Kenji's storyline is character background and set up the brand new friendship between himself and his lab partner, and all you know about Elsie is that she's a watchmaker. So the beginning was a bit slower, but once you hit that 20% mark everything comes together.
The world building was kind of confusing for Elsie's beginning chapters because I kept thinking she must be in the past, their city just got their first radio after all - but little things kept hinting that she wasn't. The technology and culture weren't totally consistent with 1895, so once I found out she wasn't really in the past but in an alternate reality, things made a little more sense.
The writing was very to the point as is typical for YA genre, this is definitely not a flowery or overly descriptive book which helped speed the story along. However, there was a bit of telling instead of showing which is also something I tend to see in the YA genre.
Personal Enjoyment
So, there were some things I liked about the book and others that didn't work so well for me. I liked the more light-hearted tone of this, and once the pacing got going it did flow pretty well. I do like seeing diversity in fantasy, and I can tell the authors really love Japanese culture, however, it was pretty heavy handed with Asian stereotypes. I was reading through the first chapter describing Kenji's morning routine and his home and I felt it was a bit overdone. However, I'm not familiar with the Japanese culture, or how they try and adapt to American culture. So, I decided to ask some of my friends who are Asian and have a much better perspective than myself. All of them read the first chapter and were genuinely upset. Instead of having Kenji's culture shown as background helping paint a subtle picture, his culture was sort of shoved in your face and shown as window dressings - eating with chopsticks, morning routine training with katana's, and using foreign words like "Tatami" to describe normal things like a floor mat instead of just describing it. When a culture is shown to be exotic rather than natural it can come off the wrong way. There were many small things that by themselves wouldn't have been anything to complain about, but when looked at as a whole can paint a stereotypical picture that isn't meant to be hurtful/frustrating but can be.
Audience:
Multi pov
female pov
urban fantasy
portal fantasy
light reads
YA
Ratings:
Plot: 9.5/15
Characters: 8/15
World Building: 9/15
Writing: 9/15
Pacing: 11/15
Originality: 9/15
Personal Enjoyment: 5/10
Final Score: 60.5/100
January 19, 2019
Thank you to the authors for providing me with a review copy of this book. Also a big thank you goes to Esme over at the Weatherwaxreport for setting up TBRindr.
What did I think?
While it sounds absolutely great on paper, it never really fully grabbed me.
The first thing I noticed was the stunning cover. I would love to own that pendant, even though I rarely wear jewellery. The second thing I noticed was how impeccably this book is edited. The prose is straightforward and very pleasant to read, and the plot moves along with a good pace.
However, there's a lot of exposition and quite a bit of telling. The opening pages describe Kenji's bedroom and morning routine in detail, and that's not something that will hook me.
While I didn't think the characters were particularly well developed throughout the story, they did start out strong and distinct. I enjoyed the friendship between Kenji and Hyrum a lot. I'd love to see more friendships like this between young adults and teenagers.
The world building is interesting, and I appreciate diversity a lot, but at times it felt like Kenji's Japanese culture was shoved into the reader's face so to speak. Diversity should be a natural aspect of any setting and every story but not something that stands out like a sore thumb, at least in my opinion.
I think this a solid debut, and I am excited to see what else these authors will come up with.
The Pendant Path is a light and easy read that will definitely appeal to younger readers. Recommended to any YA fantasy fan who is intrigued by the synopsis and likes portal fantasy.
What did I think?
While it sounds absolutely great on paper, it never really fully grabbed me.
The first thing I noticed was the stunning cover. I would love to own that pendant, even though I rarely wear jewellery. The second thing I noticed was how impeccably this book is edited. The prose is straightforward and very pleasant to read, and the plot moves along with a good pace.
However, there's a lot of exposition and quite a bit of telling. The opening pages describe Kenji's bedroom and morning routine in detail, and that's not something that will hook me.
While I didn't think the characters were particularly well developed throughout the story, they did start out strong and distinct. I enjoyed the friendship between Kenji and Hyrum a lot. I'd love to see more friendships like this between young adults and teenagers.
The world building is interesting, and I appreciate diversity a lot, but at times it felt like Kenji's Japanese culture was shoved into the reader's face so to speak. Diversity should be a natural aspect of any setting and every story but not something that stands out like a sore thumb, at least in my opinion.
I think this a solid debut, and I am excited to see what else these authors will come up with.
The Pendant Path is a light and easy read that will definitely appeal to younger readers. Recommended to any YA fantasy fan who is intrigued by the synopsis and likes portal fantasy.
October 31, 2017
No one will trust this review. I am the mother of the author and without question most people will not trust me to be honest and unbiased. I understand that, but if you think I would not be honest then you don't know me -- my children can attest to my nearly complete lack of filter and brutal plain-speaking.
So,
1. Do I want my daughter to be a successful writer? Of course. I'm not a monster.
2. Is this an excellent book? Yes and no. It is an excellent first novel. It was engrossing to read, the characters were well written and sympathetic, the world building and fantasy elements were great. I found it hard to put down and could forget for stretches that my daughter had written this (co-written) and just enjoy the experience as a novel. I had some minor quibbles, but knowing that the audience is focused on Young Adults, I think those would be overlooked.
3. Most of us have the unfortunate experience of feeling betrayed by ratings on Goodreads: we search for our next book to read, trust the reviewers glowing reviews, then two chapters in realize that many readers are not discerning readers -- enthusiasm is not to be equated with quality. I don't want you to have that experience. You can see I have given this a four star review -- go ahead, discount it by half a star because dammit I am the mother and I love her -- but this book will make you happy. It is fun, fast-paced, and solidly well-written. I think it will make you happy too.
So,
1. Do I want my daughter to be a successful writer? Of course. I'm not a monster.
2. Is this an excellent book? Yes and no. It is an excellent first novel. It was engrossing to read, the characters were well written and sympathetic, the world building and fantasy elements were great. I found it hard to put down and could forget for stretches that my daughter had written this (co-written) and just enjoy the experience as a novel. I had some minor quibbles, but knowing that the audience is focused on Young Adults, I think those would be overlooked.
3. Most of us have the unfortunate experience of feeling betrayed by ratings on Goodreads: we search for our next book to read, trust the reviewers glowing reviews, then two chapters in realize that many readers are not discerning readers -- enthusiasm is not to be equated with quality. I don't want you to have that experience. You can see I have given this a four star review -- go ahead, discount it by half a star because dammit I am the mother and I love her -- but this book will make you happy. It is fun, fast-paced, and solidly well-written. I think it will make you happy too.
December 14, 2017
Fun adventure.
A fun and well written adventure with great characters. Perfect for young adult fiction fans. Cant wait to read what comes next.
A fun and well written adventure with great characters. Perfect for young adult fiction fans. Cant wait to read what comes next.
November 10, 2017
Clear writing, fast moving plot and likable characters make The Pendant Path a good read. A portal to another world, the fascination of that world and the maturation of characters and their friendships make it an even better read. Kenji and Hyrum meet Elsie, Xan and Kisa in the alternate world. All of them try to help Xan out of a predicament. As they work together they enlarge their talents and discover untapped reserves of hope and courage, talents and Affinities, and cleverness and perseverance within themselves and within their friends. And they have fun doing it. And I had fun reading it.
November 25, 2017
I thought this was a great debut novel. The pacing of this book was especially great; there was always some action happening that had me wanting to keep reading!
October 17, 2018
I received this book through TBRindr. It is a debut book for both authors, I believe, and it has been entered into this year’s SPFBO. Thank you Jane Barlowe Funk and Steve Boivie for sending the book.
Kenji is a teen boy who we lives alone in very sparse conditions. Both of his parents have died – his father recently – and he tries to keep this fact secret. He is highly trained and disciplined, and he lives a very regimented lifestyle, heavily influenced by eastern/oriental influences, and focusing on a type of martial arts. He apparently has traveled around quite a bit while his father was alive, and he is about to start a new school year at a new school.
Kenji is paired up with Hyrum for a school assignment, forcing them to spend some time together at Hyrum’s home. Before long Hyrum’s outgoing, friendly personality starts to chip away at Kenji’s defences, and the seed of a friendship is planted. Hyrum’s parents are extremely supportive of their son, and they are very generous hosts, practically welcoming Kenji as if he was their own. Kenji struggles with this because he wants to keep his family secrets and because his father was nearly the opposite – demanding, strict, paranoid, and cold.
After a few misunderstandings are resolved and their friendship slowly grows, Hyrum is at Kenji’s house one day when he sees the pendant that once belonged to Kenji’s mother. On inspecting the pendant in sunlight, Hyrum discovers that it refracts the sunlight against the wall, revealing some sort of portal and showing a workshop on the other side of Kenji’s mirror. Over the next few days, they run experiments to see what is happening, how it works, and they observe the other side of the portal.
Elsie is an apprentice clockmaker in that workshop. She faces a lot of prejudice since she is poor and half-British (which is apparently a problem here). Elsie’s brother, Xan, has made one bad move after another, and the latest has put his life in jeopardy. One day, Xan rushes into the shop followed by Ixtab (who was sent by the person Xan stole a priceless relic from) with serious body harm on her mind. Impulsively Kenji steps into the portal to help save Xan. From here, both Kenji and Hyrum get involved in the plans to clear the mess that Xan has created. You’ll have to read the book to see where it goes from here.
Overall, this was a fairly enjoyable book. The tone was mostly light, and the story focused quite a bit on the various relationships. In this way, it read very much like a typical YA book, especially since the majority of the characters themselves were teens.
I did unfortunately have a few issues with the book. For starters, Kenji and Hyrum risked everything to help. They could have become trapped on the other side of the portal, just to save the brother of the girl that they just met??? Even if they are the most honorable, good, and kind people ever, it seemed too implausible for my sensibilities.
Another issue was that it was never explained the connection between the two worlds. Initially, I was thinking that Elsie might have been a younger version of Kenji’s mother, but that was not the case. Why did this pendant connect these two particular worlds? What is the history of the pendant? Why did Kenji’s mother treasure it so much? I would have liked to see more with this.
I also struggled with the character of Kenji. The bulk of the first several chapters built him up to be a complete loner, but also a finely trained weapon. The isolationistic part of him carried over fairly well into his budding friendship with Hyrum, and that awkwardness and tension was handled well. My issue then came when they first went through the portal. We almost saw none of this personality from Kenji in the last 3/4 of the book. I kept hoping for more of what was built up, but it wasn’t there.
Finally, there were scattered instances where decisions that were made didn’t seem to fit with the character or the circumstances. Never anything major, but just enough to make me shake my head.
This book is fairly well done for a debut book, and for being a self-published one at that. It definitely will appeal to a younger (teen) audience, and it shows some promise for future writing. Once again, a big thank you to the authors for sending this to me. 3.8 / 5 stars.
Kenji is a teen boy who we lives alone in very sparse conditions. Both of his parents have died – his father recently – and he tries to keep this fact secret. He is highly trained and disciplined, and he lives a very regimented lifestyle, heavily influenced by eastern/oriental influences, and focusing on a type of martial arts. He apparently has traveled around quite a bit while his father was alive, and he is about to start a new school year at a new school.
Kenji is paired up with Hyrum for a school assignment, forcing them to spend some time together at Hyrum’s home. Before long Hyrum’s outgoing, friendly personality starts to chip away at Kenji’s defences, and the seed of a friendship is planted. Hyrum’s parents are extremely supportive of their son, and they are very generous hosts, practically welcoming Kenji as if he was their own. Kenji struggles with this because he wants to keep his family secrets and because his father was nearly the opposite – demanding, strict, paranoid, and cold.
After a few misunderstandings are resolved and their friendship slowly grows, Hyrum is at Kenji’s house one day when he sees the pendant that once belonged to Kenji’s mother. On inspecting the pendant in sunlight, Hyrum discovers that it refracts the sunlight against the wall, revealing some sort of portal and showing a workshop on the other side of Kenji’s mirror. Over the next few days, they run experiments to see what is happening, how it works, and they observe the other side of the portal.
Elsie is an apprentice clockmaker in that workshop. She faces a lot of prejudice since she is poor and half-British (which is apparently a problem here). Elsie’s brother, Xan, has made one bad move after another, and the latest has put his life in jeopardy. One day, Xan rushes into the shop followed by Ixtab (who was sent by the person Xan stole a priceless relic from) with serious body harm on her mind. Impulsively Kenji steps into the portal to help save Xan. From here, both Kenji and Hyrum get involved in the plans to clear the mess that Xan has created. You’ll have to read the book to see where it goes from here.
Overall, this was a fairly enjoyable book. The tone was mostly light, and the story focused quite a bit on the various relationships. In this way, it read very much like a typical YA book, especially since the majority of the characters themselves were teens.
I did unfortunately have a few issues with the book. For starters, Kenji and Hyrum risked everything to help. They could have become trapped on the other side of the portal, just to save the brother of the girl that they just met??? Even if they are the most honorable, good, and kind people ever, it seemed too implausible for my sensibilities.
Another issue was that it was never explained the connection between the two worlds. Initially, I was thinking that Elsie might have been a younger version of Kenji’s mother, but that was not the case. Why did this pendant connect these two particular worlds? What is the history of the pendant? Why did Kenji’s mother treasure it so much? I would have liked to see more with this.
I also struggled with the character of Kenji. The bulk of the first several chapters built him up to be a complete loner, but also a finely trained weapon. The isolationistic part of him carried over fairly well into his budding friendship with Hyrum, and that awkwardness and tension was handled well. My issue then came when they first went through the portal. We almost saw none of this personality from Kenji in the last 3/4 of the book. I kept hoping for more of what was built up, but it wasn’t there.
Finally, there were scattered instances where decisions that were made didn’t seem to fit with the character or the circumstances. Never anything major, but just enough to make me shake my head.
This book is fairly well done for a debut book, and for being a self-published one at that. It definitely will appeal to a younger (teen) audience, and it shows some promise for future writing. Once again, a big thank you to the authors for sending this to me. 3.8 / 5 stars.
January 27, 2018
Somewhere between 2-3 stars. The book is impeccable in the grammar/spelling department, but that is the strongest point. The writing was bland, and while at first you may think it is the voice of the main character -a very blank, curt type - you quickly realize the book will NEVER jump off the page and grab your attention. It could have been an amazing example of voice, but instead, it was just the author writing their normal style.
The book as a whole was boring but mechanically strong on an editing level. I'm not sure how I feel about the larger structure, mainly because I was bored the whole time. I stopped at 87%. What does it tell you about a book that I had no interest in finishing upon arriving at the climax? I got that far wondering what would happen, thinking I would regret it if I left the book as DNF. Ultimately, I realized I didn't care. This book slowed my reading activities down for about two weeks. If it were a traditionally published novel, I would have stopped much earlier. I pushed on to be able to give better feedback to a self-published author who asked for reviews on the Fantasy subreddit.
The book shows potential, but the writers need more experience at making the reader want to read. Compare to other books on Kindle Unlimited. They may be lacking in the mechanics and editing, but they are exciting. This book never had a moment of excitement. All scenes of tension and action were like reading a textbook.
On a good note, if you enjoy the cultural portal world of Elsie you may very well love this book. It is based off of Central American cultures. I recognize much of it from my schooling, though my memory is fuzzy on the differences between all the major Central American cultures (Azetec, Mayan, etc). It was fun running some of the foreign words over my tongue again.
Potentially good ideas, but the execution is flawed. Perhaps after 3-4 rewrites the novel could be worthy of the 4 and 5-star ratings, unbuffered by the leniency I gave this story. As a upcoming writer myself, the author would benefit from taking the story, deleting it, and writing it from memory. Imagine it cinematic - and make the reader want to have that image too.
The book as a whole was boring but mechanically strong on an editing level. I'm not sure how I feel about the larger structure, mainly because I was bored the whole time. I stopped at 87%. What does it tell you about a book that I had no interest in finishing upon arriving at the climax? I got that far wondering what would happen, thinking I would regret it if I left the book as DNF. Ultimately, I realized I didn't care. This book slowed my reading activities down for about two weeks. If it were a traditionally published novel, I would have stopped much earlier. I pushed on to be able to give better feedback to a self-published author who asked for reviews on the Fantasy subreddit.
The book shows potential, but the writers need more experience at making the reader want to read. Compare to other books on Kindle Unlimited. They may be lacking in the mechanics and editing, but they are exciting. This book never had a moment of excitement. All scenes of tension and action were like reading a textbook.
On a good note, if you enjoy the cultural portal world of Elsie you may very well love this book. It is based off of Central American cultures. I recognize much of it from my schooling, though my memory is fuzzy on the differences between all the major Central American cultures (Azetec, Mayan, etc). It was fun running some of the foreign words over my tongue again.
Potentially good ideas, but the execution is flawed. Perhaps after 3-4 rewrites the novel could be worthy of the 4 and 5-star ratings, unbuffered by the leniency I gave this story. As a upcoming writer myself, the author would benefit from taking the story, deleting it, and writing it from memory. Imagine it cinematic - and make the reader want to have that image too.
January 14, 2018
I rate most books as a true 3 stars - I like them. This book is significantly better than most self-published books. It has interesting characters and the story is compelling. The writing is ok and not distracting. I struggled through the first few chapters and then I enjoyed it. I didn't really enjoy the early sections on Elsie's world and found the premise of an alternate world set in a different time, but that geographically aligns exactly with ours and shares some common points (like the British, and calendars) to be far-fetched. I think the workings of the mirrored portal in Elsie's world were odd (no mirror required?). We never get an explanation of the origins of the pendant, the significance of the glyph clock or whether Kenji's dad was paranoid or prepared so all this detail seems like wasted information. Perhaps this is intended to be the start of a series? I think it was a good story, just not a "tight" one. I didn't find any objectionable content in the book (other than the Mormon reference to a Young Men's leader) and think this is probably most appropriate for early teens. I expect that older teens would be irritated by the same things I was.
January 18, 2018
I really enjoyed this book. The authors (who are spouses of two of my cousins) do a great job of creating a fantasy world parallel to our own, unique enough to be interesting but similar enough to draw in the reader without being confusing. The plot is believable (in terms of YA fantasy). I very much enjoyed the time spent reading this book and was sad when I finished the book and didn't have any left to read! I would recommend this for readers of all ages.
January 4, 2018
This was a fun read and mostly light hearted. The scale of the adventure was grand enough to be daunting but realistic enough to be achievable. The world was really well built and had a lot of character for what little we're shown of it. The twists and turns were super fun and overall I really enjoyed this book. Well worth a read.
February 19, 2018
I thought the book was fast paced and fun. You can tell it is aimed at YA readers, but I didn’t mind because I found the characters likable and the setting unique. I was a little bummed out when it was over since I felt like the authors had just scratched the surface of what they could do with this world they built.
September 30, 2018
An entertaining read and an interesting concept. It's a bit disjointed with the pendant and how it works also with the cultural understandings between Elsie and kenji. But overall it's a good book and a good first for the authors.
August 13, 2018
Its a very different and interesting book to read. Surely there's a good research work done. I'd recommend it for children especially.
Read the full review at www.dhawaljoshi.in
Read the full review at www.dhawaljoshi.in
January 23, 2018
Engaging quick read
This fantasy novel targets the YA crowd but is engaging for adults and older children. There is a bit of violence but is otherwise very 'clean'. It's not heavy on fantasy themes but a portal to another world keeps it exciting.
This fantasy novel targets the YA crowd but is engaging for adults and older children. There is a bit of violence but is otherwise very 'clean'. It's not heavy on fantasy themes but a portal to another world keeps it exciting.
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