Adventures in Modern Marriage

by William Nicholson

With pace, wit and a beady eye, Adventures in Modern Marriage revisits the characters from Nicholson's highly acclaimed The Secret Intensity of Everyday Life. But now the children are grown up, and the adults are older, though not always wiser. Here is a big-hearted novel about life and love in the bestselling vein of Colm Toibin and Nick Hornby 'So incredibly accurate and true. Utterly captures the sense of quiet desperation of ordinary lives ... and the ways in which life turns on a sixpence' Kate Mosse on The Secret Intensity of Everyday Life Focusing on Henry and Laura Broad and their daughter Carrie, this is a minute - but in true Nicholson style, extraordinarily empathetic - dissection of relationships and what keeps them going. It is an acute and compassionate look at male mid-life crises, female sexual desire, death and the fear of it, children and the trouble with them - all the things we battle with every day.

Genres: Contemporary

432 pages, Paperback

Published September 21, 2017

About the author

Librarian Note: There is more than one author in the GoodReads database with this name. See this thread for more information.

William Nicholson was born in 1948, and grew up in Sussex and Gloucestershire. His plays for television include Shadowlands and Life Story , both of which won the BAFTA Best Television Drama award in their year; other award-winners were Sweet As You Are and The March . In 1988 he received the Royal Television Society's Writer's Award. His first play, an adaptation of Shadowlands for the stage, was Evening Standard Best Play of 1990, and went on to a Tony Award winning run on Broadway. He was nominated for an Oscar for the screenplay of the film version, which was directed by Richard Attenborough and starred Anthony Hopkins and Debra Winger.

Since then he has written more films - Sarafina, Nell, First Knight, Grey Owl , and Gladiator (as co-writer), for which he received a second Oscar nomination. He has written and directed his own film, Firelight ; and three further stage plays, Map of the Heart , Katherine Howard and The Retreat from Moscow , which ran for five months on Broadway and received three Tony Award nominations.

His novel for older children, The Wind Singer, won the Smarties Prize Gold Award on publication in 2000, and the Blue Peter Book of the Year Award in 2001. Its sequel, Slaves of the Mastery , was published in May 2001, and the final volume in the trilogy, Firesong , in May 2002. The trilogy has been sold in every major foreign market, from the US to China.

He is now at work on a new sequence of novels for older children, called The Noble Warriors . The first book, Seeker , was published in the UK in September 2005.The second book, Jango, in 2006 and the third book NOMAN, will be published in September 2007.

His novels for adults are The Society of Others (April 2004) and The Trial of True Love (April 2005).

He lives in Sussex with his wife Virginia and their three children.

from williamnicholson.co.uk

Reviews

[Gill · Rating 2 out of 5]

'Adventures in Modern Marriage' by William Nicholson.

2.5 stars/ 5 out of 10

This latest novel by William Nicholson is a follow-up to 'The Secret Intensity of Everyday Life.' In this novel, Nicholson looks at those relationships which keep us going, both within and outside of our marriages.

I thought some parts of the book were well written e.g. the descriptions of the countryside and nature. Also there were certain scenes that I thought worked very well e.g. the discussion between Henry and his daughter on their country walk together. In fact, Carrie (Henry's daughter) was my favourite character in this novel.

However, I thought several other parts were much less interesting and less successful e.g. the major strand of the book relating to the General Election in 2015. Also, sex played a much larger part in the book than I had anticipated, and I didn't find these parts of the book particularly interesting.

Although I enjoyed a few sections of this novel, neither did it capture my interest nor did I care particularly what the outcomes were for the different characters in the book.

Thank you to Quercus Books and to NetGalley for an ARC.

[Beth Bonini · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a straightforward case of being attracted to a beautiful cover - and the title didn't hurt, either. It wasn't exactly a disappointment; it was very readable and Nicholson excels at realistic dialogue. But there was still something 'meh' about it.

Middle-aged. What connotations that compound word has, and almost none of them positive. It kind of hurts me to say this, but I don't think this novel will have much appeal for you unless you are middle-aged and probably have a good many years of marriage under your belt as well. It deals with the death of a parent, the frustration with a young adult child, infidelity, job disappointments, the feeling of physical diminishment, the shrinking of horizons and possibilities. All of it real and solid stuff - that comes to plague most of us - but somehow I didn't find the illumination that I was searching for.

[Mandy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Exactly as the title suggest, this very readable novel explores a contemporary marriage and is narrated with empathy and perception and with a fine eye for the details of everyday life. The characters are sympathetically portrayed and the nuances of married life well observed. But at its heart it’s a rather banal story of love and sex in middle age, and although the writing elevates it above its mundane subject, at the end of the day it doesn’t really amount to very much. However, I must admit to enjoying it quite a lot!

[Gumble's Yard - Golden Reviewer · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is part of Nicholson’s series of standalone but loosely linked novels exploration of the lives (and history) of the inhabitants of a Sussex village.

This story concentrates on the lives of the main protagonists of The Secret Intensity of Everyday Life. The style is the same – written in a multi-point of view, third-person present tense style and set over a few days – in this case in May 2015 (either side of the general election).

Henry and Laura are still married, but with Jack now living with Alice, but with Carrie back home and almost a recluse in her childhood bedroom, having seemingly given up on her songwriting and singing. Liz and Alan live together – Liz still a part time journalist, Alan now a screenwriter and with Liz’s Mum on the verge of death with 24-hourt nursing.

The plot is limited – Henry’s career as a TV director comes to an abrupt end as he is brutally passed over for a younger and edgier director, he also suffers a minor collapse and impotency, all of which seem connected to him with his sudden loss of status and power (to which he sees clear parallels with the post-election aftermath for Milliband and Clegg). Alan meets his first girlfriend Annie (now married to a banker turned charity director Mitch) and the two sleep together.
One of the key themes is the difference between men and women, and while this is at times strong, there is a central and very weak section to the book where the behaviour of various men shades into being stereotypically cloth-eared and self-centred, as well as a very unlikely and contrived scene between Alan, Liz, Annie and Mitch.

Another key theme is worry and insomnia – and the book powerfully opens with chapters from Henry, Laura and Carrie’s viewpoint as they all lay awake.

Still [Henry] does not sleep. Is this part of the ageing process, this waking in the small hours of the night? I have no sensation of ageing? I’m the same man I was when I got married. It’s the world round me that has grown weary. The years pass, and the longing does not abate, but the days grow shorter. The gods play their tricks; they deny poor mortals their little triumphs. Why must Homer mess so with his Trojans and Greeks? Why allow them no control over their fate? But perhaps this is to misunderstand the nature of the gods. What if the gods are not agents after all, but explanations? So Hector storms the wall built to protect the hollow ships, and later the Achaeans turn the tide of battle, and the poet, recounting the tale for his fireside listeners, concludes that Zeus rode at Hector’s back, and Poseidon rallied Agamemnon’s spearman. In such a way we suffer the accidents of life and makeup stories to give them meaning. In Homer’s time it was the immortals on Olympus. Today, what? The working out of childhood trauma. The invisible hand of the free market. Each age to its own excuse.

He compares ageing insomnia, to sleep training for babies and Ferber’s (controversial) teaching on controlled crying, which clearly he and Laura followed

… Let the child cry a little. Sleep will return. And so it did. Now it’s my turn. I wake when sleep becomes shallow. I don’t cry, but I do hurry to my bedside, I do fuss over my wakefulness. Better to harden my heart and stand outside the bedroom door until the whimpering ceases.

The characters (particularly Laura who votes Green and Henry who returns a blank ballot) reflect on their votes, particularly when their hitherto safe Liberal Seat (relying on Labour and Green tactical voting) unexpectedly goes to the Tories. Reflecting on politics and her lack of engagement compared to others who seem to care passionately, Laura reflects:

I’m not stupid …… But either I’ve missed something, or everyone else is just pretending. It’s like certain kinds of art these days. Everyone applauds but you can’t see it, so you keep quiet. You tell yourself, It’s not for me, so how can I judge? But still she does her duty. It’s like herd immunization, or chain letters. You don’t want to be the one who breaks the link.

Some more difficult to follow chapters are written in the post-death wanderings of Lizzie’s mothers mind. Both Lizzie and even more so Alice have resented her for years for her lack of warmth and continuous criticism, but we see something of her own struggles and the impact of her own childhood on her:

my father died when I was young, you know. You get frightened after that. Mummy said “Be a good soldier”. I have tried, but sometimes it’s been too hard. Forgive me [Lizzie] if I’ve been a bad mother. Having a baby scared me, to tell the truth, I never really knew what to do. But I have loved you, my darling, more than all the world. You’re all I have left. Tell me you love me. Come and give me a hug. That’s all I want, really. Someone to hug.

The book ends with Henry and Laura coming to terms with their new lives

You build a life, a family, a home. You work at a job, earn money, worry over making ends meet. You drive the children to school, you suffer through their exams, you look on helpless as they fall in love and are hurt. Then they’re gone, and this great edifice you’ve constructed, this family ark, drifts rudderless, becalmed on a windless sea

Henry discusses the ambition that has driven him for all his life, whereas Laura comments that much of her life has simply been getting through each day as it comes. In a sudden moment of clarity as the book ends, Henry

does remember, suddenly and with great force, the emotions of childhood, when each day had its own colour and taste and the school timetable created such peaks f terror and islands of calm that often by the end of the day, he longed for the safety of his bed. He remembers how tomorrow felt like a brand-new day, waiting to unfold, in which the old wounds could be healed, and new joys discovered. The same switchback of emotions as his adult life, but the horizon was much nearer. He lives by the day, or by the week, not by the year. You begin out of control … then you exert control, first over the days, then over into the weeks then the years. So you reach even further into the future, marching your armies ahead down the roads of time to subdue all opposition, to silence all critical voices. The power passes and the armies desert you. So it’s all back to childhood

But finishes on a note of optimism

People talk of a second childhood, meaning the time of helplessness in old age, the return of being assisted when you can walk, the return of nappies. It should really be called a second babyhood. There’s humiliation there, and the horror of becoming a burden. But before that there’s a stage that can truly be called the second childhood. The responsibilities are lifted, the pressures of work ease, and the day stretches before you, bright and free. A better childhood than the first, because you’re older now, and wiser, and more able to see the monsters that terrified you for the self-generated illusions that they are …. Let this not be the withering but the fruit. Everything before now a time of tilling and planting, tending and watering, waiting for the warm weather. Now the harvest

A strong if at times flawed follow up to The Secret Intensity of Everyday Life

[Margaret · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very readable and often comic. Not totally believable, but who cares when it’s entertaining?

[Joanne · Rating 4 out of 5]

It is sometime since I read The Secret Intensity of Everyday Life by William Nicholson but I do remember enjoying it, and his other books, very much. Adventures in Modern Marriage features some of the same characters from the author's other books. They aren't quite sequels but the same characters may appear in different books perhaps with less of a focus on them. It doesn't matter if you haven't read any of them before, all the books are easily enjoyed as stand alone novels.

Adventures in Modern Marriage focuses on three couples: Harry and Laura, Allan and Liz and Annie and Mitch. All are at the stage in their marriages when they have been together a long time, their children are growing up and leaving home and elderly parents may be in need of care - the sandwich generation if you like. The book is an intense exploration of what each marriage is like and the challenges and trials the couples face.

I found this to be a quietly compelling novel which had me immersed in the characters' lives as I read. I felt fury along with Henry when his tv project didn't go to plan. I empathised with Liz sitting with her dying mother wishing it was all over, but feeling guilty at the same time. I was angry with Alan as he put his marriage at risk when he met a former lover and wondered what if? I was also cheering Liz on as she worked on her magazine article showing that yes, women are just as interested in the physical side of a relationship as men and that being of a certain age doesn't mean their desires fade. I really want to know more about Carrie, Henry and Laura's daughter, and find out why she was so unhappy. I hope she might be the focus of a future book.

In examining the everyday happenings of each character's life in fine detail, William Nicholson takes his reader right into their minds. I enjoyed reading about characters of a similar age to myself and although not having the same predicaments, I could identify with their situations being a wife, mother and daughter myself. The book is a thoughtful look at marriages after many years, with their regrets and temptations but also delights. With William Nicholson's characteristically beautiful writing, this is a well observed reflective look just what a modern marriage is.

[Lucille · Rating 4 out of 5]

Adventures in Modern Marriage is one of a series of books by William Nicholson and I haven't read any of the others yet. I found this an unusual read but pertinent in view of the material he writes about, including family life and modern day politics.

The focus is on three middle class families at the time of the 2015 General Election. It's a book about people essentially, and how they react to various events in their lives. Children growing up and leaving the family home resonated as did the feeling that many politicians are out of touch with the people they represent, thus leaving them feeling disenfranchised.

An elderly mother dying a long drawn out death is a quandary for her daughter to cope with and not feel guilt is another issue that families face today; an article about women and sex written by one of the younger characters covers the double standards by which men and women are still judged; the loss of power and men having to grow used to the fact that they can no longer do what they used to. Everything experienced by each character is so well described as if Mr Nicholson knew each one personally.

Thanks to Netgalley and Quercus for the opportunity to read and review the book. I shall look out other novels by William Nicholson.

[Eleanor · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was given a free proof copy of this by Net Galley in exchange for an honest review.

Adventures in Modern Marriage looks at three middle-class couples, middle-aged and slightly above. The story is set over the days around the 2015 general election with the political upset by the unexpected results mirrored by the character’s personal upheavals. The author's insight into the workings of the human mind, of how the characters deal with ageing, how their evolution affects their relationships, and the feelings that arise when their children have reached adulthood, makes for a very interesting read. The consideration of gender-based sexual double standards and fidelity makes for an intriguing look at modern marriage.

The book is part of a series, although I was unaware of this when I read it and had no trouble immersing myself in the story and the lives of its characters. I think it would probably be worth reading the other books in the series but Adventures in a Modern Marriage works perfectly well as a
stand-alone novel. This is a really good piece of emotional and family drama.

[Kar Wai Ng · Rating 4 out of 5]

On the book cover, an accolade from The Times says ‘Nicholson’s insight into the female mind is uncanny’.

That’s odd, I thought to myself when I stumbled upon this book at the bookstore, of all the usual praises you can put, it is unusual to sell a book like this. This is my first novel by William Nicholson; and 1/3 through the book I started wondering if this is a pseudonym written by a woman. This page-turner centres around the female characters, of different ages, backgrounds and talents.

This is one of the books where (set in a small village in the UK), for the lack of a better word, mundane. Nothing much happens externally, and the conflicts the characters must resolve internally. It must be Nicholson’s familiarity with scripts. The plot is driven largely by dialogues — real and convincing dialogues. It is easy to imagine the chatter, and then the characters switch naturally into monologues — inner transformation.

For an intricate web of relations among the characters, I feel the ending also falls in as good as the diverse sub-stories allow. Last, each chapter is only 3-4 pages so this could be a good read if you have little time for each read.

[Anni · Rating 4 out of 5]

One of very few male authors who can write convincingly from a female perspective.

[Jane Gregg · Rating 4 out of 5]

Really can’t get enough of this author. Highly enjoyable.

[Angie Annetts · Rating 4 out of 5]

Middle-age middle class angst
3.5 rounded up to 4 stars. For all the 'drama' unfolding in this novel, it took until nearly the end for someone to show some real emotion; anger. I don't know if it's because I'm from a different caste, but job loss, death, family issues etc were examined in a 'polite manner' with no tears or outbursts or sense of real pain. I wasn't expecting a queue at the wailing wall, but everyone was just so darn 'sensible' about life events, which maybe made this well-written novel a bit dull. That said, I did find the passages about Liz's dying mother were very hard-hitting and touched a nerve.
Overall, I found this novel a case of too many stiff upper lips and tidy resolutions. Maybe I like a bit more 'real life' mess in my reads. And a dollop of emotion.

[Paul Snelling · Rating 3 out of 5]

More goings on in deepest Sussex. Three intertwined couples at various stages of middle age meet the challenges which attend it. Sex is at the heart of it all, of course, centrally can sex be *just* an adventure? If not the sex, is is the deception which is harmful? Annie didn’t want to be forgiven, she wanted to be understood. There’s a lot going on, too much probably, so for all the 400 pages and excellent dialogue (to be expected from a screenwriter) the themes seemed contrived and unconvincing.

[Deb Kingston · Rating 4 out of 5]

‘Nicholson writes brilliantly about what it is really like to be a woman or a man right now’ says Spectator on the cover of this book. I must admit I enjoyed reading this book, it’s not to be taken too seriously, I liked his subtle humour of portraying everyday life and marriage and the weakness of human nature with empathy and compassion and the way he stripped his characters down to their deepest foibles, anxiety and fears on the topic of sex marriage, life and getting old.

[Christopher Walker · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not sure about this one. I didn't really care for any of the characters, and while the exploration of extra-marital sex was something I'm generally interested in, here it felt like the writer had his opinions and sought characters only to voice them. Also, for a book that runs to over four hundred pages, not a great deal happens, and when things happen, it's not terribly original - the bedroom confession scene was reminiscent of the film 'Closer', for one thing.

[Catherine Boardman · Rating 4 out of 5]

Do women crave sex as much as men? That is the question at the centre of ADVENTURES IN MODERN MARRIAGE. Three middle-aged couples, based in Sussex and Notting Hill, dance around each other in a week when the 2015 General Election takes place. Not that this is a bed-hopping bonkbuster, no this is a considered look at love, ego and power.

Full review and no spoilers on my blog

http://culturalwednesday.co.uk/book-r...

[Terry Mark · Rating 4 out of 5]

A book about life's ups and downs, urges and frustrations regarding work, friends and family. I'm sure many of us can relate to this in lots of different ways. This is the fourth book concerning this group of friends in different stages of their lives and I've enjoyed all of them and really hope there will be a fifth one.

[Janet · Rating 3 out of 5]

As I am now of a similar age to the characters in this book (i.e. middle aged) I found this interesting. An engaging and enjoyable read about how couples in long term relationships manage to keep together.

I did wonder slightly about the theory that women are as randy as men, especially as the author is a man. Wishful thnking, perhaps?

[Lesley · Rating 4 out of 5]

Good read. I always enjoy William Nicholson although I seem to be reading these Sussex novels of his in the wrong order and keep having to go back to the others and check on the characters. If you don't plan on reading any more you can read them as stand alone and they work very well. If however you'd like to read them all then I'd advise starting with The Secret Intensity of Everyday Life.

[Keith Astbury · Rating 3 out of 5]

Adventures in Modern Marriage follows the lives of several couples, with their paths occasionally inter-weaving. It's not a great book, but with Nicholson having a nice way with words, it is very readable. I did, however, feel that a couple of the female characters were too similar and I didn't always believe the characters reactions to some of the events that took place.

[Linda · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked Nicholson's musings on marriage and monogamy and thought they were very interesting. However, I had trouble with the interactions between Liz and Annie and just didn't find them very believable.

[Sandy · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really love his writing and am always amazed that he is so insightful about women and life in general - very relatable.

[Abigail · Rating 4 out of 5]

A warm and satisfying read as usual from Mr Nicholson.

[Jane · Rating 3 out of 5]

Local setting is fun and non-clichéd married sex refreshing to read. However, the characters sometimes feel interchangeable and the novel can be just bloody annoying for some reason.

[Helen Beaumont · Rating 2 out of 5]

Abandoned, not read

[Key · Rating 4 out of 5]

An excellent story

[Hannah Holder · Rating 4 out of 5]

took a while to get going but came together in the end with some interesting messages.

[Lou Nixon · Rating 2 out of 5]

This was written really well and I probably would have a better attitude towards it if I was reading it very fluidly but due to the stop and start nature of my reading habits sometimes I'd have to flick through the pages to try to recall what was happening and who the characters were. I need a stronger more memorable storyline at the minute to have any hope of following.

[Shirley · Rating 5 out of 5]

I found this book in Waterstones. I have never read any of William Nicholson before. He is an amazing writer of modern life and relationships. It was an enjoyable read and one that can be put down and picked easier as you fall back into the story. The story is built around one week in May 2015, The main thread is the general election but not in a boring way. Set in a village in Sussex opens with Henry who is an writer, but feels his career in coming to an end. He lives with his wife Laura and their adult daughter who spends most of her time hiding in her room. He also feel's he has failed the political system because he couldn't vote, so he posted his blank form in the box. The story sets about explaining the relationships within the family and how Henry feels when he discovers he is on the career scrape heap.
The story also introduces Liz and Alan. Liz's mother is dying which takes her time and fills her mind, not really leaving much room for her husband. He accidentally bumps into a ex-lover and one thing leads to another.
The reader then goes into the life and marriage of Alan's lover ( Annie). We discover her husband has been having affair for the last three years, but despite this he can not cope with Annie having an affair and the possibility of losing her
William Nicholas really understand's both the workings of male and female mind, and how it works while dealing with everyday situations. This is an author I will be reading so much more off.

[Sue · Rating 4 out of 5]

An intelligent, enjoyable, and tenderly humorous tale of love, lust, identity and midlife crisis in a world where life and marriage can last way beyond the child rearing years. Almost a comedy of manners, the characters negotiate their way through a maze of responsibility, morality, excitement, loss, disappointment and fulfilment in a way which will resonate with the contemporary reader. Adventures in Modern Marriage is a pleasure to read.

Thanks to NetGalley for a free ARC in return for a fair and honest review.