The Shadow King: The Invisible Force That Holds Women Back

by Sidra Stone

Women's power, sexuality, relationship roles, and emotions all are unconsciously influenced by a compelling inner voice echoing thousands of years of patriarchal beliefs. The Shadow King reveals this voice and examines its power. It shows how to transform this Inner Patriarch from an unseen enemy to a powerful ally, enabling each woman to claim her full, and unique, feminine power.

Genres: Psychology, Nonfiction, Womens

224 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 1997

Reviews

[Gabrielle Jarrett · Rating 1 out of 5]

If you are looking for a model of feminine and masculine in the past five thousand years and especially the 1950's, based on the patriarchal model, Stone's book will please you. I was annoyed and shocked at times. I do remember believing much of what she reports, the brain washings of the fifties. I'm grateful for the work I've done to become aware of and throw out such debilitating anti-woman teachings. Yes, women and men have introjected the patriarchal system. I don't believe Stone sees her own Inner Patriarch as clear as she sees her client's.

I was shocked to read "Abortion is killing an unborn child. Taking a life is a sin." What woman would say that? Other than the Phyllis Schafly followers. She states the Inner Patriarch of men is the one who rules against incest. Really. No, the Inner Patriarch sanctifies it along with rape.
I am not a fan of Voice Dialogue, but have always been drawn to Jungian depth psychology with archetypes, complexes, and much more. There is a great gulf between the two. And between Stone and me. I don't believe in the Good Patriarch, an oxymoron to be sure. Stone's opinionated and ultra-traditional views of feminine and masculine qualities were grating. "Perhaps if the Inner Patriarch of women did not agree with the criticality of the outer world, then women would not be victims of judgements." What does that mean? It's too close to if women did not wear short skirts, they would not be raped for me.

Fortunately, I am also reading Rebecca Solnit, a perfect balm.

[Rei · Rating 2 out of 5]

Finishing this now, it strikes me as odd that this book came up as recommended reading to people, especially women, interested in learning more about the animus. That's not exactly what I got. For a book of medium length, it's hard to articulate what made this so difficult to go through. The ideas it puts forth about the Inner Patriarch are interesting, compelling even, but the entire experience was like watching unfamiliar water run through my hands, all while being aware of a vague feeling of imminent thirst - I knew there was some value in it, but is it what I need? Could it satiate me, nourish me, serve me? And where do I even begin with the question of how to bring it with me?

Still, I'm open to the possibility that maybe this simply was not the right time for me to receive this book's message. Perhaps my understanding has not yet ripened, that I simply need to learn more about both Jungian psychology and life itself to really unlock the value this book may have for my personal journey.

Will save this for another re-read in the future.

[Sarah · Rating 2 out of 5]

This has so many valid wonderful points. Unfortunately they were lost in some of the overtopedneas of some of the ideas. In fact, I found myself checking when the book was written because it didn’t seem relevant to where we are today as women. It was written in 1997 and because I was a teenager at that time maybe I’m not aware of how different things were for women then. As to where we are in 2023 some of the teachings in this book seemed irrelevant.

[Kellybiney · Rating 2 out of 5]

Got some ponder-worthy ideas , and some energy movement practices. I didn't enjoy reading it most of the book, as it says a lot of negative stuff that I don't feel like is part of my programming. Maybe more applicable to my mother's generation. But it has helped remind me to be aware of the voices in my mind and to actively question where they are coming from.

[Heiki Eesmaa · Rating 3 out of 5]

The core idea -- that the internalized sex roles can be personified and talked to in imagination or chairwork -- is really interesting and helpful. I always feel like a little unhappy with Voice Dialogue books. The system just feels vague and imprecise, compared to more overtly psychodynamic models or the form it takes in later schema therapy. But this one core idea is helpful and can fill in some blanks in other parts models.

[Leanne Hunt · Rating 4 out of 5]

I found this book helpful in that it clarified an aspect of unconscious social pressure to disregard one's own preferences. Some of the ideas in the book are no longer fresh, having been reiterated by subsequent teachers and writers, but they remain relevant.

[Veronica · Rating 5 out of 5]

La bibbia.

[Clivemichael · Rating 4 out of 5]

Accessible exploration of shadow