#MeToo: Essays About How and Why This Happened, What It Means and How to Make Sure It Never Happens Again

by Lori Perkins

# Essays About How and Why This Happened,


What It Means and How To Make Sure It Never Happens Again


More than 16 million people had posted their #MeToo story and support against sexual harassment by mid-October as a reaction to Rose McGowan’s brave admission that she had allegedly been raped by Hollywood mogul Harvey Weinstein. A groundswell of reaction to and exposure of this sexual predation was unleashed that has spread throughout Europe and beyond. New revelations of unacceptable behavior in every industry break every day as people come forward in response to the viral #MeToo posts. Protests are scheduled such as the “Take back the Workplace” Hollywood march in November of 2017, and legislation is being drafted in New York and California to finally change the way things have been for far too long.


This is the turning point. Things are going to change.


This is a historic moment and it needs to be memorialized, passed around and passed on. Although social media is a fantastic means of igniting a fire, it needs to keep burning, like a torch.


So Riverdale Avenue Books, a woman-owned leading hybrid publisher, is putting its money, words and power, behind this and publishing this collection of 26 essays from people who understand want to make this change, and we, as a society, have got to figure out a way to drive that change forward.


So pass this book around. Share it with your sons, brothers, fathers, your daughters, sisters and mothers, your co-workers and friends. Read passages to them, if they won’t read it for themselves. Leave it on the desk of someone who should know better.


Help us make this movement more than a hashtag.

Genres: Nonfiction, Feminism, Essays, Anthologies, Social Justice, Gender Studies, Contemporary

154 pages, Kindle Edition

First published November 1, 2017

About the author

Publisher of Riverdale Avenue Books and founder of L. Perkins Agency. Author of the #MeToo anthology, Fifty Writers on Fifty Shades of Grey as well as Hungry for Your Love, and 30 other erotic romance anthologies.

Riverdale Avenue Books is an award winning, innovative hybrid publisher at the leading edge of the changes in the publishing industry. We publish e-books, print, and audio books under 12 imprints: Desire, an erotica/erotic romance imprint; Riverdale/Magnus the award-winning imprint of LGBT titles; Pop featuring pop culture titles; Afraid, a horror line; SFF, a science fiction fantasy line; Truth, an erotic memoir line; Dagger, a mystery thriller imprint; Sports and Gaming featuring sports and gaming titles; VerVe featuring lifestyle titles; Hera featuring both the true and fictional lives and loves of women aged 35 and up; and 120 Days, an LGBT pulp fiction line. Started in 2011 by industry veteran Lori Perkins, Riverdale is a full service publisher, with a foreign rights and film agency department. Visit us at www.RiverdaleAveBooks.com.

Reviews

[Schizanthus Nerd · Rating 5 out of 5]

#MeToo

Before I begin, please be warned that there are potential sexual assault triggers in this book and possibly this review. If you have a #MeToo story, whether you’ve shared it or not, whether it happened yesterday or decades ago, you are stronger than you think you are and healing is possible.

#MeToo - Essays About How and Why This Happened, What it Means and How to Make Sure it Never Happens Again delivers what it promises. While I personally connected with some essays more than others, overall this book does a really good job of shedding a light on this ... I don’t want to call it a movement because that implies an ending. Perhaps cultural shift is a more hopeful term?

Some of the essays were political and others were heart wrenching accounts of experiences people have survived. Written by males and females, some who’ve experienced sexual assault and some who haven’t, I appreciated the different viewpoints and the opportunity to consider opinions that differed from my own.

I think my personal favourite was the first essay, where I learned of Patricia Douglas, who in 1937 was the first woman to “publicly call out the studios”. We’ve been inundated with news items of men and women silenced for so long bravely coming forward and telling their #MeToo stories. Knowing how difficult this is for survivors today I can only imagine the courage it must have taken for Patricia Douglas to speak of this in 1937. That is one extraordinary woman!

I could go into detail about the contents of each essay, what I liked, what irritated me, what encouraged me to want to do more in this area, but what I’d really like is for you to read it yourself. Riverdale Avenue Books has committed to making this ebook available to download FOR FREE across platforms and are selling the paperback at cost, so they’re not making money from this project.

While you’re reading, please be safe if there are likely to be triggers for you and reach out for support if you need to, but also:

* Think about the issues (painful as they are).

* Consider what you personally have the power to do to make sure we’re not talking about this time in history as a movement that could have been the catalyst for lasting change, if only ...

One of the things I love about #MeToo is that people who have been living in silence are finding their voices. Survivors are finding the support they deserve and I hope they’re accessing services that can help them navigate healing.

I could tell you my #MeToo story but I think I’ll give you a lesson in your response when someone tells you their #Metoo story. Believe me when I say that your response, especially if you’re the first person they’ve told, can make all the difference.

Now, some of these are outrageous in their insensitivity whereas others are more subtly damaging but I’ve heard every one. Please don’t say any of these to a survivor.

* “What did you do to make him think he could?” - a friend

* “What were you wearing?” - a friend

* “He was only being affectionate.” - his wife

* “How many seconds/minutes did it happen for?” - teacher in charge of student welfare, said in the context of if it didn’t last long enough it didn’t count

* “He told me what happened and he said that he didn’t mean to. It was an accident.” - his wife

* “Did you enjoy having sex with him? Is that why you didn’t tell earlier?” - a friend’s mother who worked as a nurse who primarily cared for abused children

* “Are you sure he did that?” - a friend

* “It couldn’t have possibly happened the way you described.” - the detective investigating my case

* “He told us what you said about him. You embarrassed us and we didn’t know what to say. He was really quite mad about it.” - friends

* “Are you sure it was him? Maybe it was someone else and you’re only saying it was him because you don’t want to tell me who it really was.” - teacher in charge of student welfare

* “You’re saying it happened the second time you saw him? That never happens! Why didn’t he do it the first time you met?” - the detective investigating my case

* “You can’t tell your friends about this. They’re not old enough to be able to handle it.” - teacher in charge of student welfare

* “The Royal Commission is unable to investigate individual matters.” - Royal Commission into Institutional Responses to Child Sexual Abuse

* “He’s going through a difficult divorce, he’s an alcoholic and he has two children, one a girl a few years older than you. This would make his life even more difficult.” - teacher in charge of student welfare, who thought if I felt sorry for her friend I’d shut up

* “I can’t see you anymore. I can’t talk to you about any assault other than the one you were referred to us for.” - sexual assault counsellor

* “You’re the only one who’s made a complaint about him so far. Unless someone else makes a complaint there’s nothing we can do.” - the detective investigating my case

It’s pretty complicated coming up with dodgy reasons to shut someone up, isn’t it? Want to know what you can say that will help someone who has trusted you with their #MeToo story?

* I believe you

* It was not your fault

* You are not alone

Simple, huh?!

I received a copy of this book from NetGalley (thank you so much to NetGalley and Riverdale Avenue Books for the opportunity) in exchange for honest feedback.

[Vicky "phenkos" · Rating 5 out of 5]

The publisher, Riverdale Avenue Books, kindly agreed to send me a review copy through netgalley, however, you can download the e-book for free from a number of platforms, including the publisher's own website http://riverdaleavebooks.com/books/5358/metoo-essays-about-how-and-why-this-happened-what-it-means-and-how-to-make-sure-it-never-happens and amazon. And I really think you should, as this is a great collection of essays on a staggering array of topics related to the #MeToo movement including, but not limited to, the Weinstein scandal that was the trigger for #MeToo.

One would expect the emphasis of the book to be on the sexual abuse of women in the film industry, and indeed there are essays that cover this topic, however, the book has a much broader aim: to discuss the diverse experiences of women (and men) in a culture of bullying and patriarchy that perpetuates and rewards certain behaviours at the expense of others. Thus, we have a wonderful essay by Jesse Berdinga discussing the reasons why the unacceptable bullying of the Weinstein brothers was not challenged by those at the receiving end of it, men or women.

"Even in those days at the height of their power, even with all the rewards and fame and influence, Harvey and Bob never saw themselves as Holywood. They were always two kids from Queens fighting and besting a system that didn't think they were good enough to let in. And that 'chip on the shoulder' attitude permeated all the way down the chain, through people like me, and all the way to the interns."

The book covers a number of other topics, some of them taboo, or largely ignored (such as for instance, the abuse of men and women by other women in the industry). Not all of it is about abuse, though. In another wonderful essay, Veronica Vera, artist, author and sex rights activist, describes her early experiences working for, and dating, a Wall Street trader. Vera is very honest about this affair: she was not exactly bullied into it, and she enjoyed both the sex and the rewards. But she's also perceptive enough to realise that it was sexual harassment:

" What I wasn't, was a feminist. A part of my job was to go out for drinks with business prospects, sometimes in a group with Sherman, sometimes on my own. There was no sex involved, although some of the men lived in hope. My job was to make the fellow feel special just by spending time with him, no matter how boring he was.

There was an entire revolution taking place, and I didn't notice. If I had, I might have understood that my situation at work was sexual harrassment, but the term had yet to be coined. It would be some time before the idea trickled down to Wall Street: a very macho place."

There are essays about the pervasive culture of raping and abusing very young women, and what these women then have to go through to 'protect' members of their household from the shame. In #MeToo: Protecting Men From Themselves Kate Mara makes a wonderful point about women not only having to deal with the trauma of rape but being expected to shut up about it lest they put in danger the very people that should have protected them in the first place:

"When my uncle tried to rape me (I got away) when I was 12, I told my mother (his sister), just like I was supposed to. She warned me not to tell my father, because he'd kill my uncle. She was right, he would have. But then I had to protect both myself and also my father, who would get himself in trouble if he knew.

And a bit further on:

We protect them because we can't trust them to be in control of themselves if we tell them. We can't trust them to center our needs over their own desire for violent retribution.

Lori Perkins is to be commended for commissioning and editing such a broad range of viewpoints on the #MeToo experience in such a short time after the movement erupted. I think all the essays in the collection give expression to a distinct aspect of the overall experience of living under patriarchy. I heartily recommend it to everyone who would like to read about and reflect on these matters.

[☆Dani☆ ☆Touch My Spine Book Reviews☆ · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a fantastic read and important. This book made me cry but as it said there is strength in numbers so I posted my review and story @ http://touchmyspinebookreviews.com/20...

[Lori Perkins · Rating 5 out of 5]

Essays by a cross section of America from people who worked inside Hollywood, romance writers, journalists, an HR professional, politicians, etc.

[Krystal · Rating 3 out of 5]

While some were more insightful than others, these essays managed to illustrate strong connections between gender inequality, toxic masculinity, and misogyny in a meaningful way.

[Quintin Zimmermann · Rating 2 out of 5]

As a husband and a father of two young daughters I am a huge supporter of #MeToo.

Whilst the essays in this compilation are raw and heart-wrenching, they are not the best written.

My thoughts were not provoked and my understanding was not expanded to the extent that I would have liked.

I really expected more than what was proffered.

[Marta :} · Rating 3 out of 5]

Will soon add a link to my blog for a discussion on feminism and my view on misogynism.

I liked this book's purpose very much, it's admirable, it's raw and makes you feel things and understand the gravity of the issue. I was hoping for an all-women book, though, because while men have to be our allies in this problem, it would be nice to hear women speak of their issues, only women for a chance. I wanted to hear how #MeToo affected women, how it changed the way they saw life, whether the hashtag helped them or not. Men already have so many ocassions to speak, on any subject, this is about women or even men that had been victims of sexual abuse/harassment. But the men that contributed to this book, mostly spoke of how they had been ignorant of the magnitude of this issue or how they had been bullied at work and some of them did say supportive things, but you get my point.

There were some essays in this book that hurt me deeply, you have these strong women that had to go through so much at the hands of men. And it's awful to read of it. There were some stories that didn't surprise me because they happened to me too, to women I know, but I still stood there and wondered how did we reach this point where rape and harassment are the norm. And having control over your body being something that you were lucky enough to have.

This book mostly made me sad, it did raise some questions, most of these I had already thought about multiple times. There was a question that stood up, though, and that was whether #MeToo will make a lasting impression.

I'm very much interested in knowing this, too. Because for a while, it's been an international matter, things changed, men lost their jobs, women came forward or felt safer speaking about what happened to them, but will it make a lasting impact?

Will it push us towards making this world we're living in a safer place for women? Only time would tell, I suppose.

Thanks Netgalley and the publishers for providing me with this copy. I admire the hard work everyone put into this book in order to inform people about why #MeToo matters.

And I want to thank everyone that was brave enough to come forward with their stories, you are forever my heroes.

[Biz · Rating 3 out of 5]

Average Rating: 3.29 stars.

This is a difficult review to write. I by no means want to take away from the importance of the #MeToo hashtag, but this book definitely had its flaws. I wish I could give it five stars simply for the importance of subject matter, but I can’t. I’m going to divide my review into sections based on the essays themselves.

--

Remembering Patricia Douglas, the First Woman to Call Out Hollywood for Sexual Assault: 5 stars. Haunting, sad, and made me tear up. I had never heard of Patricia Douglas before this, but she deserved a lot better than she got.

After #MeToo 2 stars. The beginning was good, but it was somehow too long and too rushed all at once. It was split into a bunch of little sections, which, instead of making the essay easier to read, felt like an information overload. There were too many sections. Every time I flipped the page I was like “Seriously?? There’s more??”

The Bully Culture of the Weinsteins: 3.5 stars. Good, but didn’t give a lot of details and didn’t really set up any tension or feelings of being overwhelmed, so it wasn’t as effective as other pieces I’d read.

The Big Ugly: This left literally no impression on me whatsoever. I can’t even remember what it was about. I’m not even going to rate it.

Wall Street Assets: 2 stars. The writing was good but the uncomfortably graphic scene in the middle of it was unneeded and just plain weird.

#MeToo: A Rock’n’Roll Runway: 3 stars. The stories were haunting, but it is a very potentially triggering piece. There was also some unneeded and racist stereotyping of black girls, which was unappreciated and wrong.

Consent: Breaking the Silence: 5 stars. Sad and hopeful all at once, with a good message r.e. statutory r*pe.

Tit for Tat: 2 stars. Another one that was kind of weird. It used the terms “male” and “female” wayy too often. Like, that is literally the type of language that TERFs use and emphasize on??? I really hope that it was accidental. However, there were some good guidelines in it that described the warning signs of a sexual predator.

“I was only…”: 5 Stars. An excellent and wonderfully written piece on the importance of not minimizing the effect of sexual harassment by not saying “I was only trying to help,” “It was only a joke,” etc.

Me Too: Protecting Men from Themselves: 5 stars. The second good piece in a row! Hooray. An excellent look at how sexual assault victims are expected to protect the loving men in their lives from their trauma. Probably my favorite piece out of the whole book.

Men, Women, and #MeToo: 5 stars. An awesome look at aspects of r*pe culture that aren’t looked at a lot in the mainstream feminist stratosphere. Another favorite.

Every Book I Have Ever Written is a #MeToo Novel: 3.5 stars. Good subject matter, but I wish it had been longer with more depth than breadth.

#NotMe’s Instead of #MeToo’s: 2 stars. There wasn’t really anything wrong with it, I was just kind of bored and it didn’t really keep my attention.

Not Them Too: 2 stars. Got a real “white feminism” vibe, and it was too short for me to really get anything else from it.

Why We #MeToo: 1 star. I read this literally five minutes ago and can’t even remember what it was about.

Until When? #MeToo: 2 stars. This was the third super short essay in a row, and I was getting kind of tired of brief essays. Wish there had been a long one somewhere in there to break the monotony.

Doing What We’ve Always Done: Gender Roles and Sexual Assault: 4.5 stars. Great topic about gender roles and how sometimes men just don’t get it. It reminded me of the intro to the10th Anniversary edition of Speak.

More Than a Hashtag: 4 stars. Brought some humor to an unfunny topic that was a welcome break from the more serious pieces. However, the humor didn’t detract from the overlaying message.

For Guys Reading #MeToo Testimonies: 4 stars. A good step by step guideline for men wondering what they can do to help.

The Wild Feminine Freed #MeToo: 1 star. Uhhhhhhh. This was just kind of weird. Like wtf was going on. Seeing Baba Yaga, the centuries old witch from fairy tales who literally runs around on a house on chicken legs, as a symbol of femininity, was…. strange.

Our Bodies Are Not the Problem: 2.5 stars. Another…. Just, bleh. I don’t know. It had no effect on me.

Hush: 4 stars. Short, but the good kind of short. It was nice to have a poem as a break from the essays. This one packed a powerful punch.

Sexual Harassment on the Job from HR’s Perspective: 4 stars. Another superb piece. I loved that it went really into depth on sexual harassment in the workplace. I learned things I didn’t know before.

Why the #MeToo Movement is a Call to Arms for Men Everywhere: 4 stars. A great piece on why it’s important to actively support the women in your life.

Politics is My #MeToo: 3 stars. uhhh some more white feminism vibes. But besides that, it definitely wasn’t the strongest piece and not a very good essay to end with.

Overall thoughts

All in all, it was definitely a nice book, and probably worth reading (especially since – according to the ARC copy, it will be free on all e-book platforms!!) if you are interested in the #MeToo movement.

I wish there had been more pieces written by women of color, and I was definitely looking for a piece written by a trans woman! Violence towards trans women is a super prevalent issue in sexual harassment, but the issue was only briefly mentioned once throughout the entire collection. And that made me sad.

(Also – it should be noted that this novel could be extremely triggering in terms of sexual harassment/assault, r*pe, and violence. Tread with caution.)

I was provided an eARC copy by NetGalley in exchange for a complete and honest review.

[The Geeky Bibliophile · Rating 4 out of 5]

#MeToo Essays About How and Why This Happened, What It Means and How to Make Sure it Never Happens Again is a collection of twenty-six essays—written mostly by women, but also a few men—with many sharing their personal stories about sexual harassment, assault, or rape.

#MeToo isn't a fun read, but it's an important one. In November 2017, millions of women from around the world shared their stories on social media (or simply #metoo if they were unable to tell their story). If you followed the movement and read even a tiny portion of these heartbreaking stories, you couldn't help but be both saddened and enraged at how pervasive this problem is. Rape culture and misogyny have enabled this pernicious abuse of women and young girls. All too often, there is no justice for the victim, leaving women unwilling to report sexual crimes, fearing they won't be believed

(NB: I'm aware that there are men and young boys who have also been victimized and are survivors of sexual harassment, assault, and rape. Their stories are just as important to be acknowledged; their trauma just as real.)

We need a society in which those who have been hurt are no longer afraid to speak up. Rather than doubt those brave enough to come forward with their stories, we should allow them the dignity to be heard, help them heal, and seek justice for them. We can only do better as a society when we shine the harsh light of truth on the evils of the world, and make a commitment to change things for the better... and that's what this book is about.

I received an advance review copy of this book courtesy of Riverdale Avenue Books via Netgalley.

[L Y N N · Rating 5 out of 5]

Due to a 30-day free trial to scribd I read this book in electronic format. Something I rarely do. (And I'm thrilled to be just reading books in hand once again! It is just not relaxing to me to read from a 'screen'.)

I was impressed with much of what these authors had to say, especially with regard to their own personal experiences. This was a very nice respite from super-famous #MeToo victims. These were more everyday people telling their own stories. For me, there is something much more legitimate about folks with no name recognition telling their own stories. I'm not sure why I feel that way, but it just feels more genuine to me. As if they are not motivated by anything other than their desire to perhaps help others feel as if they are not alone in their victimization.

[Manon the Malicious · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was provided an ARC via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

This book was a collection of 26 essays/testimonies around #MeToo.
Most essays were very heartfelt and incredible but some of them felt flat for me and some even annoyed me.
As Minnie Driver said :

"Let women do the speaking up right now. The time right now is for men just to listen and not have an opinion about it for once."

Still, this was mostly great.

[Heidi Lynn’s BookReviews · Rating 5 out of 5]

First, I want to thank Lori Perkins, Riverdale Avenue Books and NetGalley for providing me with this book so I may bring you this review.

#Me Too Essays about How and Why This Happens, What it means, and How to Make Sure it Never Happens Again edited by Lori Perkins cover of the book got my attention right away. It is incredibly powerful with three arms up different ethnicity showing that they stand together as one. This book is filled with incredible stories from incredible strong woman who are passionate about their fight in the #MeToo and #IBelieve Movement!! I stand beside them 10000%

I knew I had to read this book. I have read many memoirs on woman who were sexually abused this year. I commend those women for coming forward and sharing their stories. They are helping those who have been in similar situations seek help. I confess that I have had many #Me Too moments in my life. For me it makes me sad and angry the men that gets away with it.

#Me Too is dedicated to Anita Hill, Tarana Burke, Rose McGowan, all the woman that have bravely come forward, all those who won’t be silenced, and to the next generation who will not let this happen to them.

This book starts off with Lori Perkins reminiscing about how she had a totally out of place sexual behavior in the workplace. She was a publisher of the local newspaper in Upper Manhattan. Out of the blue a middle-aged local New York City politician asked if she would be his mistress!! Of course, she was shocked!! I would be too!

Lori put this book for everyone to tell their stories. She is hoping that this shows the beginning of this particular phase of this movement one that can be read and passed around as a reference when people look back on this time. These essays range from personal tales and reflection to cause for action and insider stories about abuse in Hollywood.

After #MeToo by A M Carley’s essay really spoke to me. AM brought up a great point in someone that sounded a lot like the famous Hugh. I never thought of him as a predator but now I do.
Wall Street Assets by Veronica Vera, D.H. S (Excerpt from her Memoir in progress) shouldn’t have shocked me seeing the subject matter. However, it did. Veronica’s first job was in 1969 in the back office. She worked with a short, loud-mouthed Napoleon that was the head trader for the company. He had a dirty mouth while he was on the phone. So, he asked her for her name in which she replied. Then he asked if she liked his material as he unzipped his fly!! There was a reason the called him “Crazy Sherman.”

This book is a must read for every female out there young and old!! This must be passed out in school libraries, counseling offices, workplaces, crisis centers, etc. Students need to be taught about this in health class in Middle or High School. This is a serious topic!! This is not going to go away anytime soon!! We need to come together and fight it!! #METOO #IBELIEVE

[Bryony Nelson · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is such an eye opener. Despite already knowing the struggles and issues of being a female and having to deal with a lot day-to-day, it was comforting reading first-hand accounts and reading how courageous and strong the writers were knowing they came out of the other side, and decided to share their experiences to help others. It was also refreshing to read essays from men who have dealt with similar issues and shedding light and speaking out on something that is more taboo in today's society. I feel this is an extremely relevant book for everyone to read and digest, especially with the current news.

[Amanda · Rating 4 out of 5]

This collection of essays are so important. These are not easy to read, but they need to be told. I believe this book will empower many others who have yet to share their own #MeToo experiences to find their voice and speak their truth. I received the ARC version of this book in exchange for an honest review from NetGalley.

[Megan · Rating 3 out of 5]

Some parts didn't catch my attention as much as others, but it was certainly interesting to read the perspective men have had on the #metoo movement. Reading this will definitely help when I study the movement during my MSc too as we have a section based around the topic.

[Peebee · Rating 4 out of 5]

So with the topic of sexual harassment dominating the news, and the #MeToo campaign dominating my social media feeds, and Gretchen Carlson's Be Fierce being the last book that I read, the stars were aligning for me to read this so I could tell others about it. It's a free ebook, a collection of essays that was written in a very short period of time (a couple of weeks, maybe?) to seize the #MeToo moment. Which is admirable, but the quality is very uneven. I'm rounding up to four stars because I still think people should read this book, but don't feel like you have to read each and every essay if you can tell it's not speaking to you. There's dispassionate analysis and deeply personal accounts of assault. There's poetry. There's some misspelling -- more than would be tolerable in other circumstances. But if you feel like there's some pieces of this phenomenon that you're missing, or you just want to hear some voices beyond those on your Facebook feed, reading this is time well spent. And unless you need a hard copy (which is available for a nominal shipping cost) you won't have to spend any money on it. Stay engaged, my friends.

I received a free copy from NetGalley and the publisher in exchange for an honest review. (But you too can receive a free copy at the publisher's website, www.riverdaleavebooks.com, as mentioned above.)

[Cami · Rating 5 out of 5]

I believe that gathering powerful people together can be very beneficial. The #MeToo movement has changed my point of view in many situations. It is vital for us to share a message like this, and this book is suitable for the ones that feel the need to listen to others for once. Many of us misunderstood the meaning behind creating this hashtag, and it is still unclear for many of us why so many people are able to tell their stories only now. I truly recommend this book, and I hope that together we can fight for a better place to live in.

[Rhonda Lomazow · Rating 5 out of 5]

Bravo to this important book,Finally a stand is being taken,we will no longer be harassed assulted tormented by men who view women as theirs to take touch ,assault,&yesvas we hear daily men are also assaulted so we as humans need to stand together,No More.This book must be read passed from person to person& hopefully there will be follow up.5=stars is the highest rating but this book deserves a standing ovation buy it share it speak the truth. #MeToo

[Susan · Rating 3 out of 5]

#MeToo: Essays About How and Why This Happened,

What It Means and How To Make Sure It Never Happens Again

More than 16 million people had posted their #MeToo story and support against sexual harassment by mid-October as a reaction to Rose McGowan’s brave admission that she had allegedly been raped by Hollywood mogul Harvey Weinstein.

While the essays do talk about an important topic, I felt that it wasn't as well written as I expected it to be.

Overall 3.5 stars

[Taylor Long · Rating 5 out of 5]

such an incredibly powerful, inspiring and educational book. Such an important issue and something needs to change. Would recommend giving this a read, even if it’s just an extract or two as it is full of such meaning. I like how it is free, everybody needs to know about this book and campaign. #MeToo x

[Lesley · Rating 3 out of 5]

Well it is personal essays on people's own experiences so hard to be critical but I did find some of the essays insights, some sad, and overall got the feeling that everyone has a story of me too, how each handles it is unique!

[Mona · Rating 4 out of 5]

I think this anthology is a very important one to have an idea behind the #MeToo movement that happened back in November. The stories all shared different point of views, some of them want us to fight while others just want to understand it.

[Dorie · Rating 5 out of 5]

#MeToo:Essays About How and Why This Happened, What It Means and How To Make Sure It Never Happens Again.
by Lori Perkins
2017
Riverdale Avenue Books
4.5 / 5

It's 2019. It's hard to believe #MeToo, a hashtag/movement named 10 years ago by Tamara Burke, is today even necessary. In fact, now more than ever, it is more than necessary.
It is essential.
We came so close to being a nation of people, working towards inclusion.
We came so close to being a nation, one of the only nations, whose pride was in our diversity-our ability to see beyond ourselves.
We came so close to being people with enough respect for each other, to give others, different from you, the same rights the entitled have always had and claimed.
We came so close to being enlightened enough as human beings, to instill an environment of people helping people,simply because we all have to live here together.
We came so close to being a nation known for our diversity, pride, respect and inclusion. Not just of ourselves, but of all people and nationalities.......
.....just to be pulled back into an environment we worked so hard to almost get beyond. The environment of fear. An environment where women, people not white, children of immigrants are treated as less, not equal. An environment that covers each other, because "boys will be boys". An environment where the phrase "Do you drink beer?" are actual responses to accusations of sexual misconduct. We are back to the "good old days", when "boys were boys" and its all just "locker room talk" anyway.
Its 2019, people. How can we explain the importance of personal dignity and respect, responsibility and not being a silent witness without #MeToo? We can not any more.
This book of essays was incredible, looking at the issue from all sides. It opened my eyes to the scope of the problem. How prevalent and ok we have become living in a subservient and subversive world. Ignoring, not supporting.
#MeToo is one of the most positive thing to come from all this. It needed to happen. Because as long as people need to be reminded that they are not entitled and its not ok to take something that is not freely given, we need movements like this. We need a reminder. Essays by Kata Mara (Silence=Violence); Jesse Berdinka's 'The Bully Culture
of Weinstein'; Paul M. Sammons male perspective on the Weinstein atmosphere and A.M. Carey's amazing history of the movement ....Poems by Liz DeBetta and Sherri Donovan... These are just a few of the many essays and stories included in this book. Each and every essay and story is a reminder of how much further we need to go to again start to win the fight of injustice and discrimination.
Please read this book, it will bring the issues so clear. Educate not hate.
We came so close.....with #MeToo it's possible again.

[Natalie Wood · Rating 3 out of 5]

Make no mistake: the day Harvey Weinstein woke up to discover he was a cockroach, we soon learned the movie mogul is but another disgusting creature on a dunghill so vast we may never dig it up.

Don’t be fooled: while the first revelations tempted satire, it is clear that the phenomenon of universal sexual harassment-cum-abuse should be far too serious for sniggers and lewd laughter.

From private homes to schools and offices; from the Israeli Knesset to the U.S. White House and on to the U.K. Houses of Parliament, communal institutions, places of worship and everywhere else people collide, it is self-evident that no matter how we identify as human beings, success, as ever, is based not on merit but tiptoes over shards of nepotism, privilege and power.

Children who complain to their mothers of sexual predation are often ignored or disbelieved while workplace victims of bullying cannot complain to the management when the villains are those in charge and who indeed may not be heterosexual men but allegedly vengeful or overbearing women.

But perhaps the root of the problem lies not in sexual tension but in the way we communicate; the fashionable debasement and defilement of everyday speech, let alone written language, all of it pointing to our fumbling through a fug of casual, mutual contempt.

I keep thinking of Ian McEwan’s novel, Atonement whose storyline hinges partly on the misuse of a word once considered so offensive that it was scarcely uttered outside military barracks or brothels, but whose stigma has become so worn that last year a British woman judge used it quite airily during a crown court hearing!

Moreover, I’ve wondered if it was coincidental that U.K. emeritus chief rabbi Lord Sacks released the transcripts of two radio talks devoted respectively to the concepts of ‘fake news’ and ‘safe spaces’soon after the Jewish Chronicle newspaper ran its incendiary features about sexual abuse and harassment, noted here and above.

Certainly, it was personal good luck that against this background, I should receive a copy of this anthology.

A collection of 26 essays edited and produced at break-neck speed by US writer and publisher Lori Perkins, the anthology is a swift, extremely powerful response to “the groundswell of reaction to and exposure of this sexual predation … that has spread throughout Europe and beyond. New revelations of unacceptable behavior in every industry break every day as people come forward in response to the viral #MeToo posts … This is the turning point. Things are going to change”, she writes.

So while there are elements of this collection I dislike, I must champion Perkins’s generosity and courage as her company, Riverdale Avenue Books has published the volume gratis on Kindle and at cost in print.

All Perkins asks in return is that readers “pass this book around. Share it with your sons, brothers, fathers, your daughters, sisters and mothers, your co-workers and friends. Read passages to them, if they won’t read it for themselves. Leave it on the desk of someone who should know better. Help us make this movement more than a hashtag”, she demands.

Now in my sixties, I’m among millions of adults and children worldwide to have experienced several #metoo crises. But I am anxious not to personalise matters, so will instead share some of what I’ve learned from Perkins’s book:

The first woman who attempted to expose Hollywood’s rampant sexual abuse was Patricia Douglas, an occasional bit-part actress who in 1937 was aged only 20 when she was deceived into attending a rowdy, drunken party where she was ambushed by two men who poured liquor down her throat before one of them flung her into a nearby car and raped her. This was the era when the MGM studio wielded such fantastic power that it held everyone in its grip, even the Los Angeles district attorney and police department. So her attempts to lodge official complaints and take legal action were continuously blocked and her character was irretrievably blackened.

For historians the case was a significant, apparent “legal first”. But by the time the full truth of her story emerged in a Vanity Fairmagazine feature, Douglas was aged 86, a great-grandmother and “housebound by glaucoma, emphysema and fear”. Still traumatized by what had happened, she had never previously discussed the incident with anyone. She went public in her declining years only because she did not want the truth to disappear with her demise.

I am surprised that Raechal Leone Shewfelt, a senior Yahoo News editor who wrote the essay about Patricia Douglas did not mention the infamous scandal of the 1920s in which silent film comedian, Roscoe ‘Fatty’ Arbuckle allegedly killed a starlet named Virginia Rappe as a result of raping her. Although she died four days after the supposed incident, Arbuckle was acquitted due to lack of evidence. While it is suggested he may have been the victim of a blackmail honey trap, his career was effectively destroyed by Hearst newspapers and the Hays Office, a film industry self–regulatory body that temporarily blacklisted him. He died aged only 46.

Was Arbuckle evil? Or was this an early case of #HimToo?

A book like this, featuring many different writers with a huge range of styles and produced so fast, falters by being occasionally repetitious, a little tedious and occasionally delivers a mixed message because so far as I’m concerned many of the contributors have an unhealthy over-absorption in sexual matters. If this view makes me appear both reactionary and ungracious, I’ll conclude by mentioning a piece that made me chuckle. Wall Street Assets, an excerpt from the memoir of artist, author and sex rights activist, Veronica Vera is by turns funny, ferocious and filthy.

It also returns me to my earlier thoughts about the misuse and abuse of language. Veronica Vera most certainly needed to study her rights after meeting the repulsive ‘Sherman’, a character at a small Wall Street trading house. How in tarnation she ever became his mistress, heaven alone knows.

After all, he began their relationship by calling her ‘shiksa’, then unzipped his trouser (pants) fly and pulled out his shirt tail “as if it were a penis”.

He also had a vile nickname for the car he gave her and did not tell her that the ‘S’ word is not just a disdainful Yiddish expression for a non-Jewish woman. It means that which is loathsome and abominable. No wonder Sherman went back to his wife!

Now, what will Harvey Weinstein do next?

[Caroline David · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a very quick read and I thoroughly enjoyed the different essays, poems, or personal testimonies. Lori Perkins makes a profound statement by saying in her introduction that "We are not a mob. We are a movement." She explained how #MeToo went global with hashtags like #YoTambien in Spanish and #BalanceTonPorc in French. Even Patricia Douglas, the first whistle-blower on the sexual abuse in Hollywood, is covered. In these essays, you hear from Jessica Berdinka who worked for the Weinstein Brothers and Paul M. Sammon who works in the industry and discusses casting couches. You even get to hear about sexual assault or harassment in the work place and how it is handled in HR. This book of essays was empowering and heart-breaking. Definitely something people should read if they need the motivation to get up and change what is happening around them.

This book was given to me for free by Riverdale Avenue Books though NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

[Shalmalee Kapse · Rating 5 out of 5]

The stories the book tells can horrify us , make us sad and angry. In addition to the stories I have read on Twitter, Facebook, and newspapers, this book is one of the attempts, made to make people more aware of the #MeToo movement, and why one should take the stories told by thousands women out there seriously and learn from them.

[Shelby Gabello · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars. I agree with another review - this book/collection of essays felt uneven. Some were thoughtful and inspiring, others read like a Facebook post.

[Geshna Ballgobin · Rating 5 out of 5]

Eye-opening book. Informative Factual.

This book is about the #MeToo movement.

"A world this riddled with sexual harassment and abuse will never be healed by a hashtag, that's for sure. Yet this moment could be the first one in which you choose to do something different, to lay the first brick in a world that is being built differently, a world safe for women's bodies and men's feelings, a world worthy of everyone's wholeness." - Courtney E. Martin

It is a collection of experiences; described by different collaborators who have witnessed or been victims of sexual harassment. It condemns sexual coercion and incites people to voice out. It describes how deeply ingrained is the image of the woman as a sexual object that is owned, used and traded by men in the society.

It answers the main question that trots in our mind: Why do the victims not voice out when and where the incident happens? Why wait all these years?

"Women remain silent because we know the statistics, we know that most cases won't make it to court, and those that do won't win. We remain silent because we know our actions will be dissected until the assault becomes our fault, not his. We remain silent because in a society where gender inequality still exists, we know speaking out could cost us the advancement we've worked hard to get, the reputation we've built, the credibility we carry." - Carmela Caruso

It was rather hard to read the book. It takes time to digest the experiences that are shared, to try to understand the struggle, the pain of the victims. But, the accounts do not instill pity but rather admiration and respect.

I highly appreciate the work that is being put forward to put an end to this era of gender inequality, misogyny and sexual coercion. This book is for me, a landmark, to educate the young and the old, men and women, about these issues that plague our society and to put an end to it.

"Let's educate them to know their rights as human beings. Let's teach our daughters and sons that they don't lack agency. They need to know the difference between consent and non-consent. They also first need to love themselves. If a child love themselves and knows their worth, they'll know what they wouldn't like done to them. If they know that, they will know not to do it to others. They need to know that their body is their own, and to respect and know that the same goes for others. This needs to be taught at home and reinforced at school." - Nikki Prince

It's a great book but I deeply regret the fact that it had to be even written.

"We as a society have a long way to go to eliminate the gender roles that many of us have easily slipped into. Drawing attention to unhealthy dynamics and speaking out are the first steps to enacting the kind of shift that needs to happen for us to be safely and honestly ourselves, in relationship to each other." - Carmela Caruso

To everyone reading this, stand up for yourself always!

"Yes means yes. No means no. It feels good to stand up for myself. For my rights. For my body. At 19. At 29. At 58. ... When will it stop? When we finally see each other as human beings. Period. Not by our sex. Not by our skin colour. Not by our religion. Just as people. People with feelings. Rights. Boundaries. People who deserve better. Respect. Kindness. Acceptance. It starts here. It starts now. It starts with us." - Catherine Gigante-Brown

[Kirsten · Rating 3 out of 5]

The hashtag #metoo was started by social activist Tarana Burke in 2006 to raise awareness of sexual abuse among women of color. Actress Alyssa Milano borrowed the hashtag in October of 2017 to encourage all women who have experienced sexual abuse, assault, or harassment to post about it on social media in order to show the magnitude of the problem. According to a CNN story, the hashtag was used on Facebook more than 12 million times in the first 24 hours.

Lori Perkins states the purpose of these essays is to show “the beginning of this particular phase of the movement” and I very much like the premise but ultimately I think this collection falls short. I was hoping for a collective, cohesive, voice but I found the essays to be disjointed.

I was disappointed that male authors were included in these essays when barely a dent has been made in documenting women’s stories. Just as with the #BlackLivesMatter movement, when someone responded with #AllLivesMatter, they missed the point. This is about a historical, institutional, systemic, global crisis of sexual harassment, assault and degradation of women.

I was especially taken aback by Jude M Lucien’s words in her essay Men, Women and #MeToo: "Likewise, women sexually assault people. They don’t do it nearly as often as men do, and I attribute that to patriarchy (in other words, if women ruled the world, I think they might perpetrate many more sexual assaults, but they are subordinate in this world, so they don’t do it nearly as much)..." I understand this is a personal essay but I think that is a false and disappointing statement.

Overall these essays are worth the read in the spirit of documenting the start of this movement but many more voices need to be added and heard.

“It’s how, as a society we view the female. How society takes our words, clothes, past sexual histories and scrutinizes them. This isn’t about how many people a woman has slept with. Or how short her skirt was on the day her boss decided to touch her without consent” - Gen Ryan Until When? #MeToo

“A world this riddled with sexual harassment and abuse will never be healed by a hashtag, that’s for sure. Yet this moment could be the first one in which you choose to do something different, to lay the first brick in a world that is built differently, a world safe for women’s bodies and men’s feelings, a world worthy of everyone’s wholeness.” - Courtney E Martin For Guys Reading #MeToo Testimonies

“The problem is not how many stories there are, but the fact that no one is paying attention. No one is giving them proper credence…” - Liz Debetta Our Bodies are Not the Problem

Riverdale Avenue Books is offering this ebook of essays for free. I received an ARC of this ebook from Net Galley. All opinions are my own.

[Kaitlyn Joy · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was given a e copy of #MeToo in exchange for an honest review.

As a woman (human), I have been impacted by the Me Too movement. I have gone into a club and experienced unwanted touching and pictures taken without my permission. I have a Me Too moment (okay, maybe more than a moment). So I want to start off my review saying that I have a stake in this movement as do too many others.

Lori Perkins starts off the collection by writing about her motivation, “The #MeToo movement is part of a larger ripple of change, but most of it has been on social media, which is ephemeral. I wanted to put something together immediately so that we can have a document of this, as a record of the moment in time when we said in unison, ‘This has to stop.’” I think the book accomplishes this goal.

There are several essays that comprise the book. I read each one. There were some I loved and some I thought were okay. I think that is the goal of an anthology though, especially one about this, you want to capture several view points and experiences, because this is such a massive problem, not all people will understand all perspectives and stories and that’s okay. That’s how we learn about an issue we are exposed to other people’s powerful stories and language. All of the essays were well thought out and considered, there were simply some that stuck with me more than others.

One of my favorite ones was a discussion about protecting men from themselves. This chapter works off the idea that women are told by well meaning fathers, brothers, friends and partners, ‘If someone ever hurt you, I’d kill them.’ The author of this essay writes how when she was abused she kept it a secret because she didn’t want the man in her life to resort to violence and potentially get themselves in trouble. She writes about how this threat can keep woman silent and I agree. When someone has already taken so much from you, you don’t want them to take your loved ones from you. You don’t want to ruin someone you loves life. You want support, you want not to be shamed, you don’t want this assault to ruin anymore lives. And so you stay quiet. It was really helpful to hear another woman speak this truth. It helps.

There are several essays that cover workplace harassment, assault, child abuse, and men coming to terms with the abuse that women have long suffered in a misogynist society. There are essays that describe the unbearable pain. There are essays that offer support for those hurt. There are essays about changing the story.

You don’t need to read every essay (though, I’d recommend it). Find the one that speaks to you. Find the one you need. The author writes about how this book will be a free EBook so that it can reach as many people as possible. So download it now.