Love Like That: 5 Relationship Secrets from Jesus

by Les Parrott III

Improve Your Relationships Today In this down-to-earth, practical new book, #1 New York Times bestselling author Dr. Les Parrott provides a simple plan to improve all of your relationships--with family, friends, coworkers, and even strangers. Dr. Parrott takes the latest findings from psychology and sociology and blends them with biblical teaching to reveal five transformative ways of relating to people demonstrated by Jesus Each chapter contains a self assessment, and the results will aid your growth and help you revolutionize your relationships.

Genres: Christian, Marriage, Nonfiction, Christian Living, Religion, Relationships, Audiobook

240 pages, Hardcover

Published September 4, 2018

About the author

#1 New York Times best-selling authors, Les and Leslie. A husband-and-wife team who not only share the same name, but the same passion for helping others build healthy relationships. In 1991, the Parrotts founded the Center for Relationship Development on the campus of Seattle Pacific University - a groundbreaking program dedicated to teaching the basics of good relationships.

Married in 1984, the Parrotts bring real-life examples to their speaking platform. Their professional training - Leslie as a marriage and family therapist, and Les as a clinical psychologist - ensures a presentation that is grounded, insightful and cutting-edge.

The Parrotts are New York Times #1 Best Selling Authors. Their books include the award-winning Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts, Love Talk, Real Relationships, The Parent You Want to Be, The Hour That Matters Most and Crazy Good Sex.

Each year Les and Leslie speak in over 40 cities. Their audiences include a wide array of venues, from churches to Fortune 500 company board rooms. Their books have sold over two million copies in more than two dozen languages.

The Parrotts have been guests on many national TV and radio programs such as CNN, Good Morning America, CBS This Morning, The View with Barbara Walters, NBC Nightly News, and Oprah. Their work has been featured in USA Today and The New York Times.

Visit their website for lots of free resources at www.LesandLeslie.com

Reviews

[Zizi · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was not what I expected. It was better. It is a relatively easy read with easy to understand concepts. The author simplified the idea of loving like Jesus into 5 qualities, and then spent a chapter explaining each one.

One thing I really enjoyed were the "snapshot" quizzes in each of the 5 chapters. They helped me see how inclined (or disinclined) I was towards that particular quality of the love of Jesus.

I would recommend this book to anyone looking to understand better how to truly love others. (It would also make a great small group study book.)

*Thank you to the publisher for letting me read this advanced copy.

[Carrie Daws · Rating 5 out of 5]

I appreciate when books can draw me in with a story that defines the problem, give me some Scripture to consider or add insight, and add some practical tips or steps to think through. Les Parrott does this well in Love Like That.

Highly useful, Dr. Parrott gave clear examples of how we all struggle to love people as Jesus did then he draws on Scripture to show us how Jesus changed things around. For example, how do you love a foul-mouth person that you'd prefer not to be anywhere near? It's not about bringing them lunch or offering to pay their light bill (unless God directs you to do that, of course), but it's about offering them grace-filled curiosity. Changing your heart so that you see the person before you rather the behavior that repels you.

The author consistently dives deeper than our actions and focuses on our attitudes. He asks us to think about the thoughts behind our responses and work on our heart that drives our conduct. He leads from a place of believing that who we are directs what we do, admitting along the way that he's not perfected this either. 

This is an easy yet thought-provoking read. Much like Jesus's parables, the concepts are simplistic but will take a lifetime to improve upon. If you want a book that's highly understandable yet life-challenging, consider Love Like That.

[Lori Jorgensen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ever want to love people the way Jesus does? Ever wonder if it was obtainable?? This book explains how in quite a simple but very enjoyable way. There are 5 counter - intuitive ways: being mindful, being approachable, being a grace - giver, being vulnerable and being empathetic. He then shows how to practice them in every day life.

[Heather · Rating 5 out of 5]

I enjoyed reading Love Like That. The five areas that are examined are mindfulness, approachable, grace-filled, bold, and self-giving. I liked the quizzes in each section to see where you were in those areas because they sometimes revealed things I was unaware of. I also loved the direct examples of these five areas in Jesus’ own life. My favorite quote is, “We need to be able to abandon our own agenda to be able to love like Jesus.” Take the time to read the appendix at the end as it is helpful for application. I would definitely recommend this book.

[Joanne Petty · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dr. Parrott's book, "Love Like That," was an amazing, up-front look at how Jesus lived his life. This book will teach everyone who reads it the unmatchable qualities that Jesus demonstrated to others. We are blessed to have Dr. Parrott sum it up so simply to help us all strive to put others first and be more like Jesus!

[Brian Bussard · Rating 5 out of 5]

It is common to find books that tell you that you should love others like Jesus loved. What makes Dr. Les Parrott’s book Love Like That uncommon is that he actually tells us how to do it.
Dr. Parrott creates a refreshing blend of science and Biblical truth, and compels healthy introspection by asking relevant follow-up questions after each section.
Now that I have finished my Advance Reader Copy, Love Like That is going to be one of my most gifted books this coming holiday season!

[Melissa · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have read many books recently talking about learning to love like Jesus. This seems to be a common goal that we are all striving to reach. This book Love Like That written by Les Parrott not only shows us how Jesus loves, but gives us a line by line plan to work towards loving like Jesus. I love how this book starts with the fundamentals of how Jesus loved. Jesus was a great blueprint whose life taught us to love others with a pure and genuine love.

The five areas are addressed in the five chapters of the book, but wait Les even throws in a bonus in the appendix to give us the answer to how we can work on those five areas. I know this book stopped me dead in my tracks a few times. I can definitely use the themes taught in this book throughout the remainder of my life to continue to grow in love.

Thank you for the opportunity to read and review this book. I received an advanced electronic copy of this book from the author and the review is my own opinion.

[Robin Denton · Rating 5 out of 5]

I just completed reading Love Like That. The book has an easy reading style that is spiritually inspiring and personally challenging. I will likely read this book again, and I will recommend it to friends. I was given an advanced reader’s copy from the publisher.

[Mitchell Ryan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank you to the publisher for giving me the opportunity to read the advanced reader's copy. I recommend this book to everyone, Christian and non-Christian. I think most people would agree that learning to love like Jesus would influence their relationships for the better. Dr. Parrott helps the reader connect the words of Jesus, straight from scripture, to practical, relevant ways to love like Jesus did. I was humbled as I read the book because while Jesus' teachings seem so simple, they are not often the easiest to carry out in my life. The quizzes at the end of each chapter helped me to realize how I truly relate to each of the 5 characteristics Dr. Parrott discusses. This reflection gave me the insight I needed to make the book more practical in my own life. I was also encouraged when I later read the passages of scripture used in each chapter and found them to have a new and fresh meaning. This book will be a great resource to churches and small groups but equally as powerful to anyone who picks it up.

[Jenna Buenger · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was fortunate to read the advanced reader's copy of this book. This was the first book of Dr. Parrot's I read that was not specific to married life. I have gained tons of wisdom and insight from all of his other books and I was excited to read this one. The biggest difference between this book and maybe something similar, is Dr. Parrott's success in using self-assessment quizzes to help people better identify with what they are reading and how it effects them uniquely. Each chapter ends with a quiz that allows the reader to rate how they feel they live out Jesus' "relationship secrets" and questions to consider how they might do it better. Honestly, they are simple and obvious questions. That doesn't mean they're bad, it makes it better because all we need sometimes is just a good reminder of what we may already know. This book doesn't make you feel less than or incapable of being everything God has called you to be. It encourages you that loving like Jesus is very doable.

[Ruth · Rating 4 out of 5]

A good metaphor for this book is it is the mirror Jesus’ brother talks about in James 1:22-24
“be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in a mirror. For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like.”
If committed Christians read this book intently, they will get pretty clear images of how well they are fulfilling Christ’s command to love. I found this quite humbling. We all think we are doing a better than average job, but we all have weak spots, and Dr. Parrott points them out AND give very useful ideas on how to work on those spots. If you seriously want to follow Jesus, you will appreciate this book.
I would have rated this book 5 stars, but it has, in my opinion, the serious flaw of using “The Message” to quote scripture. This is like fingernails on a blackboard to serious Bible teachers; putting words and modern idioms into quotes from Jesus and Paul is not being faithful to the word of God. I would very much recommend using this for a small group, but, as a leader you will have the awkward situation of having to reread all the Bible texts in a valid translation.
I received an advance reader copy from the publisher.

[Jason Kolar · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked it okay. Don't judge my 3 stars. I want to love like that and Dr. Les Parrott challenged me too. His chapter on being bold did especially. I also loved that every chapter had a self survey to help you reflect on how you love.

So why 3 stars? Maybe it's expectations. Maybe it was my mood. But I wanted to dive a little deeper on each topic. On some chapters I loved his application, while others left me needing more. The other thing that bothered me was every quotation from scripture was in the Message. I'm not a message hater, just more of a Message Cautioneer. I think we need to be leerie about using it as our go to ”quote” from scripture.

So should you read Love Like That? Yeah. It's a good blend of psychology and Jesus.

[Amber · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love Like That by Les Parrott is the most motivating book I have read in a long time! Each page is thought provoking and heart-stirring. I couldn’t stop reading about the amazing ways in which Jesus’ love is radical, scandalous, and above reason. Jesus’ love is so unlike anything else, yet Les has made it tangible. I’m thankful for Les’ raw honesty and vulnerability, as well as his informed understanding of social science and Scripture.
To be transformed is to love like Jesus, and to love like Jesus is to be transformed. You can’t help but want transformation and more of Jesus’ love in and through you when you read this book.

“Jesus’ love was for anyone, regardless of what laws they’d broken or sins they’d committed. Jesus was scandalously approachable because it was the very essence of his love.” (Les Parrott, 2018, p. 49)

I received an advanced electronic copy of this book from the author and the review is my own opinion.

[Aaron Bauer · Rating 5 out of 5]

WOW, just when you think you've got yourself figured out a book like this comes along. It seems simple enough to love like Jesus (simple not easy), and many Christians think they are doing just that. Les blends practical insight with biblical principles and gets to the root of the issue in easy to follow chapters. I especially like that he includes a self assessment in each chapter. The genius is the assessment is in the middle of the chapter, so when you score yourself low, you have the awareness to pay attention to the solutions. Well Done! I received an Advance Reader Copy of the book from the publisher.

[Crystal · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love this book! Excellent and tangible 💜. This is not a marriage book. It's a love book; love your neighbor, love your friends, love a stranger, love your kids book🙌. Discovering how to love like Jesus book🤗. The conclusion and appendix were my favorite chapters, so much meat and encouragement there. I will surely be keeping this one on hand and be referring back to often🙌

[Karla · Rating 5 out of 5]

“Let me say it again: the long and the short of it is that we love like Jesus when we allow Jesus to love through us. It’s not about our effort. We are not trying to imitate Jesus. It’s an inside job. It’s about being a channel for his love.”

[Sylvia Davis · Rating 3 out of 5]

I received an advanced readers copy of this book. If you are looking for practical ways to love like Jesus, this is what you’re looking for. The author leaves practical advice for the readers, space for reflection, and then guidance for moving forward to love like Jesus did (and does).

[Rebekah · Rating 3 out of 5]

I did enjoy this book, but there were things about it that made me feel uncomfortable... It was probably the fact that it was full of psychology and I would have preferred more Scripture.

[Kaitlyn Overstreet (Jackson) · Rating 4 out of 5]

I love the combination of psychology and faith!

[Natalie · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book offered a nice variety of advice that I found applicable to all relationships in my life. I liked his key points, but found the book to be underwhelming and mostly rehashing what I've heard before in similar pieces.

[KamBree Prather · Rating 5 out of 5]

WOW!

I have been reading a lot of books about Love and Jesus these past few months and this by far was the best!

Not only hearing a different perspective and a how to approach of loving like Jesus but using this material and these ‘5 Relationship Secrets’ to teach and lead my four children to love like Jesus.

I was blessed and was able to receive an prerelease readers copy of this book. Thank you so much Dr. Les Parrott for share your heart and following Gods will for you life, sharing His word.

[Debbie · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is about how Jesus loved others and what stands in the way of our loving like he did. Being focused on achieving our own agenda gets in the way of seeing the needs of others. Pride and the desire to be part of the "in" crowd stands in the way of people feeling like they can approach us. The desire to feel like we're better than others stands in the way of our showing love to those who don't deserve it. Fear and the desire to be accepted stands in the way of our telling the truth and living transparent lives. Selfishness stands in the way of our thinking about others before thinking about ourselves. He ended by explaining that loving like Jesus is impossible in our own effort and how to allow Jesus to love others through us (through the power of the Holy Spirit).

The author described studies that illustrate how people act. He also quoted Scripture (in a paraphrase version) and summarized events in Jesus life to illustrate his points. I didn't like that he sometimes slipped his own speculation about motives and such into his summaries without pointing out that these were his ideas and weren't actually stated in the Bible. However, I would recommend this easy, quick read because his main points were good and useful.

I received a review copy of this book from the publisher through Amazon Vine.

[Otis · Rating 5 out of 5]

There's a 23 and Me Commercial entitled 'Getting to Know You.' As I walk through this awesome book, Love Like That, and soaked in the powerful lessons of being mindful, approachable, grace-full, bold, and self-giving, Dr Les Parrott ties it all together with the only way to accomplish this task is by getting to know you: the Holy Spirit.

The way Dr Parrott reveals the transparency of this, loving like Jesus, is not an easy task is refreshing. The truthfulness show the maturity of a seasoned Christian willingness to surrender his will for God’s greater purpose. Awesome book. Well written. Wonderful, Meaningful, Powerful insight of how to begin the process to Love Like That!

[Michelle Webb · Rating 5 out of 5]

We all want to love others well but always seem to fall short. Our flesh is so good at getting in the way. Love Like That simply breaks down how we can love others the way Jesus did. It gives you the tools you need to actually put this into practice and along the way you see how you are loved lavishly yourself!

[NRM · Rating 3 out of 5]

It was an easy read. I liked the way Dr Parrott explained his thoughts on loving like Jesus. There were 2 reasons I gave it 3 stars instead of 4. The first was I wanted more, I wanted him to go deeper into scripture and psychology. The second reason was his chapter on self-giving. As someone working through co-dependency issues I felt that he needed to explain healthy self-giving better. If a reader was struggling with setting healthy boundaries with a partner/ family member then I think this chapter would send the wrong message.

[Justin Ruszkiewicz · Rating 4 out of 5]

A surprising, short, and sweet book! Dr. Parrott, who created the SYMBIS content for engaged/married couples (AMAZING material my wife and I went through as we were engaged), offers a simple but compelling book on how we can love others like Jesus more than every before. And let me just say, I LOVED reading this book!

The five relationship secrets include being mindful, approachable, grace-full, bold, and self-giving—compiling into five longer but easy-to-read chapters that offer exposition of stories in the life of Jesus, insightful psychological studies and perspectives, and the author’s own experiences and life stories. I loved that each chapter offered a definition of the word and a personal exam that wasn’t too long but had thought-provoking questions throughout it.

But I’d say that this book’s conclusion AND appendix are a little misleading, for typically those are short and not necessary to read, but I felt that they were VERY important to read and you won’t get the complete message Parrott is conveying without reading them. And I thought the idea of abiding in Jesus and walking in step with the Spirit was a fantastic way to end off the book.

My only knock on this book is I wish there could have been a little more content regarding application and practical or spiritual steps we could take laid out for each of the five chapters. I do feel it’s missing a little meat there. Not to mention, the Scripture references rarely had the passage actually written down, so for some who aren’t as familiar with the Bible will struggle to know what Scripture Parrott is quoting.

Overall, a book that’s easy to read but packed with spiritual challenges that can only be possible to accomplish through an abiding relationship with Christ and with His Spirit in us! Loved the book and highly recommend it.

Rating: 8/10, four stars!

[Kattie · Rating 4 out of 5]

First off let me say, I am NOT a reader... I do not enjoy reading and as a child, I hated reading. So for me to finish a book, says something in itself. With that being said, I did read this book to the very last page. I found the book to be informative and thought provoking, while making me seriously consider how I respond or don't respond to people. When one thinks about "loving like Jesus" it can be overwhelming and leaves you feeling like a failure. But the way Les has laid his thoughts and ideas while using scripture, you come away with a new perspective and understanding of "loving like Jesus." The book is an easy read, yet there is a lot that will make you want to spend time "just going over in your heart & mind."

I was given the opportunity to read this before it was released and I am so glad I took the time to do so. In a world where it's easy to get caught up in ourselves and "think" we are doing the best we can, this book has helped me to have more compassion, to ask more questions and have less "judging." While I don't consider this book a "step by step" book - this book does have "steps" that - if you are willing to do - you will find yourself suddenly loving more.

I loved all the scripture that was used but was disappointed that the references were not included which is what led me to leave a 4 star review and not 5.

[Philip John · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book. Many other reviewers wrote about practicality and I agree but this is the thing I appreciated most -
How to draw from your Spirit as an energy source. It takes effort and emotional resources to Love Like That. My resources are drastically inadequate but how do I tap into the eternal resource? This books helps.
Some other thoughts -
Being ok with being inefficient since that is the price of relationship. Love is not "efficient" and that's ok.
Jesus loved the outcasts (of which, I am one).
How to find grace by asking one question.
I appreciated the historical context of the parables used. I understand them far better than ever.
How to feel more loved and connected (resulting in a bolder deeper ability to love others).
What does the fear of missing out truly cost me? And what do I gain from practicing empathy?
What is the solution for the hard places in my heart regarding certain people?
I love that there is a massive appendix with further practical tips leveraging science and expert knowledge to help kick-off the growth process.
The layout of each chapter with the introspection quiz in the middle was very helpful for me.

Thanks Dr. Parrott! I will read this many times.

[Sarah Wilson · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5/5 stars. There were some really applicable things in this book that I definitely appreciated and most people could definitely benefit from reading them (including me!). But it felt like a checklist for Christianity and that just isn’t my thing. “Do this and then life will be better for you as a Christian.” And while there IS some truth inside of that, the reality is that we will never be enough & always fail when we are given a checklist to perfection; it only leaves us feeling hopeless and less than when we strive for the checklist. So as long as you can look at the book as some good concepts that might have some applicable purpose, that’s totally good and it’s a decent book. To me it felt like a checklist and after talking to a few friends who also read this a couple of them also felt that way…and others didn’t - so it is definitely going to depend on the reader. I would recommend “The Cure” by John Lynch et. al. as a book to go along with this if you choose to read it to balance it out….or if you can only read one book, I’d read “The Cure” instead.

This is a super easy read so I do like that - I finished it in no time at all and even people who don’t love to read would likely find to an easy & enjoyable read.

[Brian Craft · Rating 3 out of 5]

It was an okay book. Overall, well written.

Parrott's lack of clear biblical reference, mixed with "the Message" paraphrase Bible being his primary scripture quoted, gave me a real lack of validity to his message. I understand some of this is more of a stylistic choice that I didn't care for. I enjoy easily referenced scripture whether in parentheticals or in the footnotes. Trying to find it in the notes portion was a pain.

I did feel the scripture used was still at a glance and not dug into more. I would have rather the framework of the chapter or the message Parrott was trying to communicate be surrounded by a scriptural passage rather than a glancing verse here or there. The last chapter was by far better than the rest of the book in giving entire passages in support of the content.

The lack of depth disappointed me because I love the idea and the outline of the book, but the lack of depth left me feeling like I wasted my time reading it. Not a bad book overall. Nothing to make it stick though. There are better books out there, with more application and scriptural reference that I would recommend far more than this.