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She's Got the Wrong Guy: Why Smart Women Settle
Why do the nicest women pick guys who let them down for one reason or another? The answers are not always straightforward. For some women, the issue is as simple as not really thinking through what they re looking for or should be looking for in a man. Others feel they d rather be with someone (and pretty much anyone will do) than be alone, while still others are unconsciously replicating patterns of bad relationships they learned in childhood or from traumatic experiences and don t know how to stop the cycle. Deepak Reju, writing from his years of experience as a pastor and a counselor, shares with women his perspective on how to assess a relationship's strengths from the beginning, how to identity possible pitfalls, and how to have the courage to not just settle but to wait for a relationship that will be a blessing to both of you.
220 pages, Kindle Edition
Published November 15, 2017
56 people are currently reading
441 people want to read
About the author
Deepak Reju
22 books26 followersDeepak Reju, MDiv, PhD, serves as the Pastor of Biblical Counseling and Family Ministry at Capitol Hill Baptist Church in Washington, DC, and is a contributing author in Christ-Centered Biblical Counseling and the forthcoming Scripture and Counseling. Deepak and his wife, Sarah, have been married over ten years and have five children.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 64 reviews
March 17, 2024
4.5 - I’m not going to lie. I read this book for the purpose of thinking about several other single friends who are either in or pursuing somewhat questionable relationships and wondering how to talk to them biblically. What I didn’t realize was how much I needed this book for my own heart! First off, the reason I’m taking off half a star is because the title, and some of the tone of this book, makes it difficult to give to the very woman who needs to read it most unless she has a very soft heart and is ready to hear some hard truth. It would be better titled “Dating Wisely and Well for the Single Christian Woman” or something like that. However, this book was filled to the brim with solid theology and godly wisdom. While it’s mostly aimed at those particularly tempted to settle in dating and marriage, Deepak comes time and time again looking at the heart of the single Christian woman, pointing her to the truth of Scripture and the grace of God. The temptations of the single woman who settles are often the same temptations of those who don’t. If I could (again, the title makes it hard!) I would put this book into the hands of every single Christian woman I know as a way to encourage them to persevere in obedience and holiness. I’ll be recommending it often.
“The goal of a single Christian woman is not to find a husband, but a Savior. The ultimate destination for a single Christian woman is not marriage, but heaven. Build your life around preparing for heaven by growing in your godliness and love for the Savior. You will never be disappointed.” P. 162
“The goal of a single Christian woman is not to find a husband, but a Savior. The ultimate destination for a single Christian woman is not marriage, but heaven. Build your life around preparing for heaven by growing in your godliness and love for the Savior. You will never be disappointed.” P. 162
November 7, 2017
This is a good book for Christian women who are dating or thinking about it. Women are under such pressure today that they often settle for the wrong man. Through examples of couples and teaching from the Bible, Reju explains how mistakes can be made in pursuing a husband and what women should be looking for in a man.
The bottom line of Reju's book is that we are to desire Jesus more than anything or anyone else. Marriage is only for this life, Reju reminds us, but our relationship with Jesus is for eternity. No thing nor person can satisfy our deepest need – only Jesus.
Reju looks at many of the “wrong” guys. He cautions women to avoid the control freak, the Christian in name only, the immature Christian, the angry man, and more. He really had good insights into these characters. I particularly like his chapter on the angry man. Anyone struggling with anger would benefit from the teaching contained within.
Reju also reminds readers of the role of the church in supporting singles and those dating. Young people frequently need wise counsel and I do not see the church fulfilling that role.
I recommend this book to single women and those desiring to help them through wise counsel. You'll be challenged to determine the condition of your heart and to whom you are looking for your happiness.
I received a complimentary digital copy of this book through Litfuse. My comments are an independent and honest review.
The bottom line of Reju's book is that we are to desire Jesus more than anything or anyone else. Marriage is only for this life, Reju reminds us, but our relationship with Jesus is for eternity. No thing nor person can satisfy our deepest need – only Jesus.
Reju looks at many of the “wrong” guys. He cautions women to avoid the control freak, the Christian in name only, the immature Christian, the angry man, and more. He really had good insights into these characters. I particularly like his chapter on the angry man. Anyone struggling with anger would benefit from the teaching contained within.
Reju also reminds readers of the role of the church in supporting singles and those dating. Young people frequently need wise counsel and I do not see the church fulfilling that role.
I recommend this book to single women and those desiring to help them through wise counsel. You'll be challenged to determine the condition of your heart and to whom you are looking for your happiness.
I received a complimentary digital copy of this book through Litfuse. My comments are an independent and honest review.
November 19, 2017
I read She's Got the Wrong Guy, IWhy Smart Women Settle)in exchange for honest review from Litfuse. The book was written by Deepak Reju. The book is Christian-based. Reju discusses how dating is harder for single, intelligent, Christian women.
For me, I was impressed with the title. I have limited dating experiences. I never been big on dating and relationships. I started late in life dating. I focused on grades to achieve my goals to moving as far from Texas as possible, in order to have a life (ended up moving back in 2010. I married my first boyfriend, even though I saw red flags. I was in college at the time (for the wrong reasons. not the right school for me), when I met him. We got married less than two years later after we married.
The next and last boyfriend, I had was in 2006. The relationship lasted a month or so. I met him, leaving work. He was going in to work and I was on my way to the bus stop to go home. What stood out about him was he was wearing a suit to go clean a stadium.
I just don't grasp the ins and outs of dating. I want to date. I want to be married again one day, but I want to do things the right way. From my limited dating experiences and my former promiscous life, I have seen many red flags, I don't want in my next relationship.
I have noticed not many men want to date a celibate woman, nor do many want to date the promiscuous woman. Many want the option of sex if I decide to enter into a relationship. Even with celibacy, everyone has a different definition. I have talked to "celibate" men, who still wanted the option of sexual activity without the penetration. Reju does a good job explaining how sex has become prevalent in today's society. Even Christians struggle with promiscuity and pornography.
Reju also discusses how women settle for men because they want marriage or motherhood. Women accept red flags to achieve goals. Women also stay in settled relationships, even when the relationship isn't working. From dating non-believers to dating overly flirtatious men, women settle. Settling and ignoring red flags can affect your morals, values, and faith. When I was younger, I was taught co-habitation and premarital sex was wrong. I was raised these things was wrong, yet engaged in them many times. As I got older, I had to pay for the consequences of my actions, including a more jaded personality. I can sense a red flag approaching and try to shut it down quick. It's like I heard and seen this before, this is not anything new, go away.
The book is a good read.
For me, I was impressed with the title. I have limited dating experiences. I never been big on dating and relationships. I started late in life dating. I focused on grades to achieve my goals to moving as far from Texas as possible, in order to have a life (ended up moving back in 2010. I married my first boyfriend, even though I saw red flags. I was in college at the time (for the wrong reasons. not the right school for me), when I met him. We got married less than two years later after we married.
The next and last boyfriend, I had was in 2006. The relationship lasted a month or so. I met him, leaving work. He was going in to work and I was on my way to the bus stop to go home. What stood out about him was he was wearing a suit to go clean a stadium.
I just don't grasp the ins and outs of dating. I want to date. I want to be married again one day, but I want to do things the right way. From my limited dating experiences and my former promiscous life, I have seen many red flags, I don't want in my next relationship.
I have noticed not many men want to date a celibate woman, nor do many want to date the promiscuous woman. Many want the option of sex if I decide to enter into a relationship. Even with celibacy, everyone has a different definition. I have talked to "celibate" men, who still wanted the option of sexual activity without the penetration. Reju does a good job explaining how sex has become prevalent in today's society. Even Christians struggle with promiscuity and pornography.
Reju also discusses how women settle for men because they want marriage or motherhood. Women accept red flags to achieve goals. Women also stay in settled relationships, even when the relationship isn't working. From dating non-believers to dating overly flirtatious men, women settle. Settling and ignoring red flags can affect your morals, values, and faith. When I was younger, I was taught co-habitation and premarital sex was wrong. I was raised these things was wrong, yet engaged in them many times. As I got older, I had to pay for the consequences of my actions, including a more jaded personality. I can sense a red flag approaching and try to shut it down quick. It's like I heard and seen this before, this is not anything new, go away.
The book is a good read.
June 10, 2018
Such a helpful book. Aimed at single women, I found it very useful as a tool for reflecting on my own marriage and how I can more faithfully serve my wife and honor the Lord in our marriage.
The author's years of experience as a pastor and counseler shine through as he discusses why Christian women often settle for marrying men who are not well suited to be husbands. His discussion of the different kinds of men is clear, direct, but also gracious. He deeply empathizes with the desires to be married and how that can lead to poor decisions, but also clearly portrays the later costs of compromising.
Yet at the same time, hope for the redemption and maturity of foolish, immature, or unregenerate men is also clearly presented. Not only that, his chapter towards the end reminding us that God will give grace to live a faithful life even in the difficult circumstances of a hard marriage is such a precious meditation.
Deepak helpfully points the readers towards the importance of grounding your hope in Christ, not in a husband, family, or any other relationship. Highly recommend to men and women alike--don't be put off by the gruff-sounding title. It is full of pastoral grace and wisdom.
The author's years of experience as a pastor and counseler shine through as he discusses why Christian women often settle for marrying men who are not well suited to be husbands. His discussion of the different kinds of men is clear, direct, but also gracious. He deeply empathizes with the desires to be married and how that can lead to poor decisions, but also clearly portrays the later costs of compromising.
Yet at the same time, hope for the redemption and maturity of foolish, immature, or unregenerate men is also clearly presented. Not only that, his chapter towards the end reminding us that God will give grace to live a faithful life even in the difficult circumstances of a hard marriage is such a precious meditation.
Deepak helpfully points the readers towards the importance of grounding your hope in Christ, not in a husband, family, or any other relationship. Highly recommend to men and women alike--don't be put off by the gruff-sounding title. It is full of pastoral grace and wisdom.
March 10, 2022
Really great book. Very practical and applicable. The author doesn’t mince words. He gives good warning signs for single women to watch out for in the men they date; and a strong plea encouraging single women to first and foremost seek after Christ. Highly highly recommend!
November 22, 2017
When I first picked up She’s Got the Wrong Guy by Reju Deepak, I was skeptical. As a young single woman, I don’t need another how-to book on dating. However, when a second call went out about reviewing this book, I accepted because I have many close friends who have insisted on settling for the wrong kind of guy and I was genuinely interested in understanding why and perhaps if this would be a good book to recommend to them.
The author has personally counseled many of these women so he seeks to give some clarity about why women settle for the wrong man. He gives about ten examples of guys to avoid: the angry man, the unchurched guy, the newly saved Christian, and so forth. As a young single who had grown up in the church and even read books such as I Kissed Dating Goodbye, a lot of the information about the wrong guys not to settle for I already knew. In fact, the guys he describes are the very guys that I would tell no to in a heartbeat if they asked.
While most of the book was irrelevant to me, I don’t regret reading it because as I stated earlier, I picked it up mostly to understand why women would insist on settling for these kinds of guys. It makes sense now and this would be a book I would recommend to those ladies.
The chapters are super short so the book can easily be a quick read. What I appreciated about the book is that the author gives lots of sound Scripture of hope and encouragement to the reader. He always brings it right back to the Cross and explains that only Jesus Christ can fully satisfy.
Highly recommended!
Disclaimer: I received a copy of this book from the publisher for my honest review, which I have given. I was not required to write a positive review and have not been compensated for it in any way. All opinions expressed are my own.
The author has personally counseled many of these women so he seeks to give some clarity about why women settle for the wrong man. He gives about ten examples of guys to avoid: the angry man, the unchurched guy, the newly saved Christian, and so forth. As a young single who had grown up in the church and even read books such as I Kissed Dating Goodbye, a lot of the information about the wrong guys not to settle for I already knew. In fact, the guys he describes are the very guys that I would tell no to in a heartbeat if they asked.
While most of the book was irrelevant to me, I don’t regret reading it because as I stated earlier, I picked it up mostly to understand why women would insist on settling for these kinds of guys. It makes sense now and this would be a book I would recommend to those ladies.
The chapters are super short so the book can easily be a quick read. What I appreciated about the book is that the author gives lots of sound Scripture of hope and encouragement to the reader. He always brings it right back to the Cross and explains that only Jesus Christ can fully satisfy.
Highly recommended!
Disclaimer: I received a copy of this book from the publisher for my honest review, which I have given. I was not required to write a positive review and have not been compensated for it in any way. All opinions expressed are my own.
April 28, 2022
Wonderfully encouraging to read as a single woman. It’s been discouraging to continue into my late-20s with only negative dating experiences. This book was refreshing bc it affirmed my decisions not to settle when dating men. It also gave me insight into the red flags to watch out for when dating in future or simply in just observing single men around me. This book always returns to the gospel and sufficiency of Christ. Absolutely recommend for HS and college girls or just singles of any age. Men might find great insight too because they can use each chapter to examine the affects of sin that they might have on a marriage. It was super convicting to me in that sense as well. Sin obviously affects marriage and Christ is the only source of repentance and hope.
June 11, 2023
So good! I already want to reread it 😅
Read
August 19, 2024This book felt so honouring to me as a single.
Reju speaks to the wholeness of a single woman in Christ, not suggesting that her purpose and identity is found in marriage or motherhood. He esteems marriage, while placing many wise cautions to guard from idolizing it, inviting us to know experientially Christ as Enough. He does not offer false hope that God has marriage in mind for each of us, and instead fosters a healthy desire for marriage & an ultimate hope in Christ. He calls out traits and attitudes that are dishonouring to women in relationships, and pleads w sisters to honor God and themselves by not settling for someone who dishonours Him or them. He shares w pastoral care how prolonged singleness is better than an unhealthy, abusive and lonely relationship (leading to such a marriage).
I really appreciated this read.
Note, the title doesn’t quite fit the book, and irks me a little bit.
Reju speaks to the wholeness of a single woman in Christ, not suggesting that her purpose and identity is found in marriage or motherhood. He esteems marriage, while placing many wise cautions to guard from idolizing it, inviting us to know experientially Christ as Enough. He does not offer false hope that God has marriage in mind for each of us, and instead fosters a healthy desire for marriage & an ultimate hope in Christ. He calls out traits and attitudes that are dishonouring to women in relationships, and pleads w sisters to honor God and themselves by not settling for someone who dishonours Him or them. He shares w pastoral care how prolonged singleness is better than an unhealthy, abusive and lonely relationship (leading to such a marriage).
I really appreciated this read.
Note, the title doesn’t quite fit the book, and irks me a little bit.
March 23, 2023
This book addresses a topic that sorely needed to be addressed. Have you ever looked at a relationship gone awry and wondered why in the world a smart, savvy, wonderful Christian lady ever ended up with THAT guy? Especially if the relationship tanks or is just surviving (as opposed to thriving)? I have many a time.
Reju puts his finger on why this happens. The subtitle is actually entitled "Why Smart Women Settle." In a culture that elevates marriage (that's a good thing) to the point of idolatry (that's a bad thing), the author brings light to a subject oft neglected. At the same time, he provides hope and direction to single ladies.
In the first chapter entitled, "Same People, New Problems" Reju says this, "As a woman, is your deepest desire for a husband, or for Christ?" And so he sets the table for the rest of the book with a strong challenge for single women looking to be married, those single women who believe God would have them to be married, to make Jesus Christ their first & foremost focal point in life.
As the pastor of biblical counseling and families in a larger church in Washington, DC, the author draws on his long experience of seeing these situations play out in both good and bad situations. One of the many positives of the book came by way of anecdotes of different couples (I'm assuming names have been changed) and how the relationship worked out (or didn't).
Reju lays the ground work in Part 1 by asking the question "Why Do Smart Women Settle?" and by giving biblical principles showing ladies where to put their focus while waiting on a husband.
I absolutely LOVED Part 2 of the book where Reju answers the question, "Am I Dating the Wrong Guy?" He lists ten different types of men that women need to be wary of (and in some cases) run from! Each of these men are given a short chapter and described in detail by way of character studies. They are as follows:
The Control Freak
The Promiscuous Guy
The Unchurched Guy
The New Convert
The Unbeliever
The Angry Man
The Lone Ranger
The Commitment-Phobic Man
The Passive Man
The Unteachable Guy
As I read each chapter, I kept saying, "Amen" and "So true" as I have seen some of these types of men bring much heartache to a marriage. Within each of these chapters is biblical advice on what to do if you are currently dating this type of guy.
I love that Deepak Reju has such a strong stand on the importance & primacy of the local, New Testament church. Because of the church, a man that a women would want to date could be held accountable, can make friends with other men in the church, and can be observed by the church family. In short, any man that has no desire for this type of relationship to the church should be avoided.
In Part 3, the author concludes with "The Quest for a Godly Man." He challenges ladies not to "settle" for any man but to pursue a real Christian man. The chapter entitled "Why Waiting is Okay" reminds all of us in this "I-want-it-now" culture the benefits of waiting. I like Reju's section in this chapter that encourages a young lady to "Share Your Heartache & Pain with Others." Here is an excerpt:
"You don't have to wait alone. In fact, let me say this more strongly- you can't wait alone. A church community is essential for your survival. You need a church community that values your singleness, and at the same time, fosters a culture where singles equally value marriage. It's necessary for a church's health to have singleness and marriage thrive together, side-by-side, acting as essential components of that same community.
We gather on Sundays at church to help each other wait. Because, of course, we are all (both married and single) waiting for something. Local churches are waiting co-operatives. We explore the goodness of God in his Word and share it with each other. We hear testimonies of God's faithfulness, which help us to wait. We remind one another that this world is not our home. We cry on each other's shoulders. We pray waiting prayers and sing songs that remind us to wait. We confess our sins. As long as we are in this world, we wait."
-p. 148
Reju also encourages (and warns) ladies to wait when it comes to sex:
"One of the hardest areas to show patience is in the area of sex. Sexual temptation plagues you. The culture screams in your ear, 'Get it now! It feels so good! Don't delay!' God has made sex a beautiful thing, and he asks you to entrust your sex drive to him. Sex is more than just pleasure and having kids. It's powerful and most people underestimate its influence. God has reserved sex for marriage because he knows what's best for you. Handling sex before marriage is like messing with dynamite. Most singles don't realize (when they first engage in extramarital sex) its potential to destroy their life. So God asks you to be patient and wait."
p. 149
In all, the author continues to point single women not just to marriage, but to the God of marriage! I love that. Notice this sentiment in the following quote:
"Disney wants you to believe that you are waiting for Prince Charming, who will swoop in on a white horse, fulfilling your every last dream. God says you are really awaiting the Prince of Peace. So as you wait, remember who it is you are waiting for."
p. 149
I highly recommend this book and will probably purchase a case of them to give to young ladies graduating high school and those struggling with singleness.
Reju puts his finger on why this happens. The subtitle is actually entitled "Why Smart Women Settle." In a culture that elevates marriage (that's a good thing) to the point of idolatry (that's a bad thing), the author brings light to a subject oft neglected. At the same time, he provides hope and direction to single ladies.
In the first chapter entitled, "Same People, New Problems" Reju says this, "As a woman, is your deepest desire for a husband, or for Christ?" And so he sets the table for the rest of the book with a strong challenge for single women looking to be married, those single women who believe God would have them to be married, to make Jesus Christ their first & foremost focal point in life.
As the pastor of biblical counseling and families in a larger church in Washington, DC, the author draws on his long experience of seeing these situations play out in both good and bad situations. One of the many positives of the book came by way of anecdotes of different couples (I'm assuming names have been changed) and how the relationship worked out (or didn't).
Reju lays the ground work in Part 1 by asking the question "Why Do Smart Women Settle?" and by giving biblical principles showing ladies where to put their focus while waiting on a husband.
I absolutely LOVED Part 2 of the book where Reju answers the question, "Am I Dating the Wrong Guy?" He lists ten different types of men that women need to be wary of (and in some cases) run from! Each of these men are given a short chapter and described in detail by way of character studies. They are as follows:
The Control Freak
The Promiscuous Guy
The Unchurched Guy
The New Convert
The Unbeliever
The Angry Man
The Lone Ranger
The Commitment-Phobic Man
The Passive Man
The Unteachable Guy
As I read each chapter, I kept saying, "Amen" and "So true" as I have seen some of these types of men bring much heartache to a marriage. Within each of these chapters is biblical advice on what to do if you are currently dating this type of guy.
I love that Deepak Reju has such a strong stand on the importance & primacy of the local, New Testament church. Because of the church, a man that a women would want to date could be held accountable, can make friends with other men in the church, and can be observed by the church family. In short, any man that has no desire for this type of relationship to the church should be avoided.
In Part 3, the author concludes with "The Quest for a Godly Man." He challenges ladies not to "settle" for any man but to pursue a real Christian man. The chapter entitled "Why Waiting is Okay" reminds all of us in this "I-want-it-now" culture the benefits of waiting. I like Reju's section in this chapter that encourages a young lady to "Share Your Heartache & Pain with Others." Here is an excerpt:
"You don't have to wait alone. In fact, let me say this more strongly- you can't wait alone. A church community is essential for your survival. You need a church community that values your singleness, and at the same time, fosters a culture where singles equally value marriage. It's necessary for a church's health to have singleness and marriage thrive together, side-by-side, acting as essential components of that same community.
We gather on Sundays at church to help each other wait. Because, of course, we are all (both married and single) waiting for something. Local churches are waiting co-operatives. We explore the goodness of God in his Word and share it with each other. We hear testimonies of God's faithfulness, which help us to wait. We remind one another that this world is not our home. We cry on each other's shoulders. We pray waiting prayers and sing songs that remind us to wait. We confess our sins. As long as we are in this world, we wait."
-p. 148
Reju also encourages (and warns) ladies to wait when it comes to sex:
"One of the hardest areas to show patience is in the area of sex. Sexual temptation plagues you. The culture screams in your ear, 'Get it now! It feels so good! Don't delay!' God has made sex a beautiful thing, and he asks you to entrust your sex drive to him. Sex is more than just pleasure and having kids. It's powerful and most people underestimate its influence. God has reserved sex for marriage because he knows what's best for you. Handling sex before marriage is like messing with dynamite. Most singles don't realize (when they first engage in extramarital sex) its potential to destroy their life. So God asks you to be patient and wait."
p. 149
In all, the author continues to point single women not just to marriage, but to the God of marriage! I love that. Notice this sentiment in the following quote:
"Disney wants you to believe that you are waiting for Prince Charming, who will swoop in on a white horse, fulfilling your every last dream. God says you are really awaiting the Prince of Peace. So as you wait, remember who it is you are waiting for."
p. 149
I highly recommend this book and will probably purchase a case of them to give to young ladies graduating high school and those struggling with singleness.
January 7, 2018
If you are a single Christian gal OR if you minister to single Christian gals, this book is a must-read. It’s the perfect mix of slap-you-across-the-face-truth mixed with grace, hope, and encouragement.
November 16, 2017
If you’re a woman, dating is tough. There’s no other way to say it — Dating is hard work. The awkwardness of being asked out. The forced conversation on the first date. The agony of waiting to be called back because the guy is trying to figure out how long he should wait before picking up the phone. Add to that the rise of modern technology and dating apps, websites, social media, etc and it just gets downright crazy. On top of all of that, after the relationship has begun, many women are left asking themselves, “Am I dating the wrong guy?”
Dating for the Christian woman may be even harder. Not only do you have to deal with all of the awkwardness above, but you’ve also got some very specific Biblical guidelines by which to examine a prospective husband and determine whether he is suitable for marriage. After all, there is no casual dating for the Christian. All dating should be with an eye set toward marriage. So you’re constantly asking yourself, “Would he make a good, godly husband? Am I dating the wrong guy?”
Because of these difficulties and the pressure being placed by the world and even the church around her, many women today settle in their dating relationships. You know what the Bible says you should be looking for in a husband, but all the good ones just seem to be taken. Plus, you’re not getting any younger, are you? Add to that the constant pressure from friends, family, coworkers, church members, and others always wanting an update on your current dating situation, and the pressure on today’s young Christian women is overbearing.
A New Book
In a new book titled She’s Got the Wrong Guy: Why Smart Women Settle, Deepak Reju seeks to help Christian women understand what sort of man they should be looking for, and why it is that they are often tempted and prone to settle for less than what God would have for them. As the pastor of biblical counseling and families at Capitol Hill Baptist Church in Washington, DC, Deepak Reju has had his fair share of relationship counseling sessions – married, engaged, dating, and single. As such, he has seen many success stories, many horror stories, and many examples of women simply settling for a man whom she knows isn’t exactly who God would have her marry. Why is that?
Why Do Women Settle?
In the first part of the book, Reju begins with this simple thesis: “In the midst of the contemporary challenges to dating and marriage, the greatest need for a single woman is to ground her life in Christ” (1). The fact is that there are many contemporary challenges to dating and marriage — sex is everywhere, it’s hard to find good men, technology is changing the way we do relationships, men are intimidated by strong and confident women, and many many are wanting to be single longer and get married later, just to name a few. The challenges abound.
In light of those challenges, why do women settle? Reju offers a few reasons that he has seen firsthand in his counseling office.
First, many women are putting marriage first. They have taken the good gift of marriage (and that it is) and elevated it to the place of an idol — something that they must have, and if they don’t have, they are unhappy, unfulfilled, or incomplete.
Second, Reju identifies personal baggage as another reason women settle. Perhaps they have a fear of rejection from past relationships, poor role models as they grew up, etc. Whatever the case may be, there is personal baggage that leads to settling.
Third, love is blind. As such, many women allow themselves to get so emotionally attached to the wrong kind of guy that she begins to compromise on many principles she never thoughts she would compromise on.
Fourth, many women live under the tyranny of their fear and anxiety — fear that she’ll be lonely for the rest of her life, fear that she won’t ever have children, fear that no one will take care of her when she’s old or feeble, and fear that she won’t be loved for who she is. The list of fears could go on and on. Those fears and anxieties cause her to compromise and settle for the wrong man.
Fifth, many women are looking for the wrong things. At the top of her list is physical attributes, a particular sense of humor, or a certain kind of impressive job. While these things can be contributing factors, they should pale in comparison to the things that she should be looking for in a godly, holy, Christ-honoring and Christ-pursuing man.
Are You Dating the Wrong Guy?
In the first part of the book, which we summarized above, Reju looks at why women settle. Now in the second part, which is the bulk of the book, he looks at 10 kinds of men that Christian women should avoid. Reju says: “Apart from genuine repentance, faith, and humility, these men are not worthy of your time … it’s unwise to marry these ten kinds of men” (32). So who are these men? Below are the ten:
1. The Control Freak
2. The Promiscuous Guy
3. The Unchurch Guy
4. The New Convert
5. The Unbeliever
6. The Angry Man
7. The Lone Ranger
8. The Commitment-Phobic Man
9. The Passive Man
10. The Unteachable Guy
Reju devotes a chapter to why each of these men is unsuitable for a Christian woman looking to date a man that will one day become her husband. In each chapter, he includes a story of a wife and a husband who is the type of man depicted in that chapter. Following that story, Reju includes some reasons why that type of man should be avoided, and what some of the reasons are that a woman would be tempted to settle for that particular man. In each chapter, Reju’s goal is to warn the single woman about what her future could (and probably will) hold if she continues in her relationship with that type of man.
The Quest for a Godly Man
In the final section of the book, Reju turns his attention to how the Christian woman should go about (a) breaking up with one of those ten men and (b) go about finding a godly man who is worthy of her and is suitable for marriage. After giving 11 questions to ask whether or not to end a current relationship, and assuming the answer is “yes,” he then gives 17 incredibly helpful bits of advice on breaking up to the glory of God. Finally, he ends with a couple of chapters encouraging women not to expect perfection (because it will never happen) as well as to be okay with waiting. Waiting is difficult for most of us for a variety of reasons, but it is often the primary posture for a Christian, especially a woman waiting for the man who is fit to be her husband for the rest of her life.
He ends the book with these words:
“Hold out for the man who is committed to Christ, not just in his words, but with his entire life … Look for the guy who shows through his life that godliness matters. For some of you, that might mean choosing singleness, because that godly guy will never come around. For others, the godly guy may one day come, but for now you must wait and be patient. Whether your waiting lasts for a season, or for life, Christ will sustain you as you wait. Lean into him. He is enough for this life and for the life to come” (162).
Conclusion
I am very thankful for Deepak Reju and his writing of this book. He writes the book from personal experience in counseling with hundreds of couples throughout his ministry. In this book, you will find biblical wisdom, sound reason, and Christ-exalting advice for single Christian women. I do not know of any better commendation than to tell you that, as we are currently expecting our first daughter next year, I will certainly be saving my copy of this book to go through with her when the time comes to help her navigate this difficult world of dating. If you have a daughter, a granddaughter, or have a relationship with a single woman of any age, I would encourage you to do the same.
In accordance with FTC regulations, I would like to thank New Growth press and Litfuse Publicity for providing me with a review copy of this book in exchange for a fair and honest review.
Dating for the Christian woman may be even harder. Not only do you have to deal with all of the awkwardness above, but you’ve also got some very specific Biblical guidelines by which to examine a prospective husband and determine whether he is suitable for marriage. After all, there is no casual dating for the Christian. All dating should be with an eye set toward marriage. So you’re constantly asking yourself, “Would he make a good, godly husband? Am I dating the wrong guy?”
Because of these difficulties and the pressure being placed by the world and even the church around her, many women today settle in their dating relationships. You know what the Bible says you should be looking for in a husband, but all the good ones just seem to be taken. Plus, you’re not getting any younger, are you? Add to that the constant pressure from friends, family, coworkers, church members, and others always wanting an update on your current dating situation, and the pressure on today’s young Christian women is overbearing.
A New Book
In a new book titled She’s Got the Wrong Guy: Why Smart Women Settle, Deepak Reju seeks to help Christian women understand what sort of man they should be looking for, and why it is that they are often tempted and prone to settle for less than what God would have for them. As the pastor of biblical counseling and families at Capitol Hill Baptist Church in Washington, DC, Deepak Reju has had his fair share of relationship counseling sessions – married, engaged, dating, and single. As such, he has seen many success stories, many horror stories, and many examples of women simply settling for a man whom she knows isn’t exactly who God would have her marry. Why is that?
Why Do Women Settle?
In the first part of the book, Reju begins with this simple thesis: “In the midst of the contemporary challenges to dating and marriage, the greatest need for a single woman is to ground her life in Christ” (1). The fact is that there are many contemporary challenges to dating and marriage — sex is everywhere, it’s hard to find good men, technology is changing the way we do relationships, men are intimidated by strong and confident women, and many many are wanting to be single longer and get married later, just to name a few. The challenges abound.
In light of those challenges, why do women settle? Reju offers a few reasons that he has seen firsthand in his counseling office.
First, many women are putting marriage first. They have taken the good gift of marriage (and that it is) and elevated it to the place of an idol — something that they must have, and if they don’t have, they are unhappy, unfulfilled, or incomplete.
Second, Reju identifies personal baggage as another reason women settle. Perhaps they have a fear of rejection from past relationships, poor role models as they grew up, etc. Whatever the case may be, there is personal baggage that leads to settling.
Third, love is blind. As such, many women allow themselves to get so emotionally attached to the wrong kind of guy that she begins to compromise on many principles she never thoughts she would compromise on.
Fourth, many women live under the tyranny of their fear and anxiety — fear that she’ll be lonely for the rest of her life, fear that she won’t ever have children, fear that no one will take care of her when she’s old or feeble, and fear that she won’t be loved for who she is. The list of fears could go on and on. Those fears and anxieties cause her to compromise and settle for the wrong man.
Fifth, many women are looking for the wrong things. At the top of her list is physical attributes, a particular sense of humor, or a certain kind of impressive job. While these things can be contributing factors, they should pale in comparison to the things that she should be looking for in a godly, holy, Christ-honoring and Christ-pursuing man.
Are You Dating the Wrong Guy?
In the first part of the book, which we summarized above, Reju looks at why women settle. Now in the second part, which is the bulk of the book, he looks at 10 kinds of men that Christian women should avoid. Reju says: “Apart from genuine repentance, faith, and humility, these men are not worthy of your time … it’s unwise to marry these ten kinds of men” (32). So who are these men? Below are the ten:
1. The Control Freak
2. The Promiscuous Guy
3. The Unchurch Guy
4. The New Convert
5. The Unbeliever
6. The Angry Man
7. The Lone Ranger
8. The Commitment-Phobic Man
9. The Passive Man
10. The Unteachable Guy
Reju devotes a chapter to why each of these men is unsuitable for a Christian woman looking to date a man that will one day become her husband. In each chapter, he includes a story of a wife and a husband who is the type of man depicted in that chapter. Following that story, Reju includes some reasons why that type of man should be avoided, and what some of the reasons are that a woman would be tempted to settle for that particular man. In each chapter, Reju’s goal is to warn the single woman about what her future could (and probably will) hold if she continues in her relationship with that type of man.
The Quest for a Godly Man
In the final section of the book, Reju turns his attention to how the Christian woman should go about (a) breaking up with one of those ten men and (b) go about finding a godly man who is worthy of her and is suitable for marriage. After giving 11 questions to ask whether or not to end a current relationship, and assuming the answer is “yes,” he then gives 17 incredibly helpful bits of advice on breaking up to the glory of God. Finally, he ends with a couple of chapters encouraging women not to expect perfection (because it will never happen) as well as to be okay with waiting. Waiting is difficult for most of us for a variety of reasons, but it is often the primary posture for a Christian, especially a woman waiting for the man who is fit to be her husband for the rest of her life.
He ends the book with these words:
“Hold out for the man who is committed to Christ, not just in his words, but with his entire life … Look for the guy who shows through his life that godliness matters. For some of you, that might mean choosing singleness, because that godly guy will never come around. For others, the godly guy may one day come, but for now you must wait and be patient. Whether your waiting lasts for a season, or for life, Christ will sustain you as you wait. Lean into him. He is enough for this life and for the life to come” (162).
Conclusion
I am very thankful for Deepak Reju and his writing of this book. He writes the book from personal experience in counseling with hundreds of couples throughout his ministry. In this book, you will find biblical wisdom, sound reason, and Christ-exalting advice for single Christian women. I do not know of any better commendation than to tell you that, as we are currently expecting our first daughter next year, I will certainly be saving my copy of this book to go through with her when the time comes to help her navigate this difficult world of dating. If you have a daughter, a granddaughter, or have a relationship with a single woman of any age, I would encourage you to do the same.
In accordance with FTC regulations, I would like to thank New Growth press and Litfuse Publicity for providing me with a review copy of this book in exchange for a fair and honest review.
October 28, 2017
SHE'S GOT THE WRONG GUY is a book I was iffy about. Do I want to review it? No, yes, maybe, nah, not relevant to me... And then my daughter started um, sort of dating the wrong guy. And when another call out came to review the book, I thought, okay, yes, I'll read it and give it to my daughter to read.
SHE'S GOT THE WRONG GUY is a book about women Deepak Reju has counseled and why they choose the wrong guy. It also has plenty of biblical reasons why the men they chose were bad choices and what the Bible has to say about such a thing. It left me beginning to feel as if there are no perfect men out there (and there's not) but toward the end it does leave encouragement and some guidelines of things to look for in a potential mate.
I've been married thirty years and I think Deepak Reju would've told Steve and me to wait to begin dating. Why? Because Steve was a new Christian. He'd come to Christ four months before I met him and we were married four months after that. But that said, upon being saved Steve immediately felt the call to go into ministry and he dived head-on into that goal. Literally. So he was doing a lot of Bible study, growing as a Christian, and that (according to the encouragement part of Deepak Reju's book) is a good thing. Steve is far from perfect, but then neither am I. We're both human. Both totally sold out to God, but still human.
I think this is a great book for young single women to read and I think it even would be good for my son to read as the woman he's dating is a brand-spanking new Christian. In fact, he led her to Christ less than a month ago. But this book is geared toward women and their choices and my son wouldn't relate.
I am going to give my copy to my daughter as the guy she's kind of sort of dating has major anger issues. And I'll pray she takes the advice, Scripture, and wisdom in the book to heart, learn from it, and at least take the time to pray about her decisions and maybe wait for the guy God has waiting in the wings.
Recommended for single women everywhere--in a relationship or not.
I was given a copy of the book free. All opinions are my own.
SHE'S GOT THE WRONG GUY is a book about women Deepak Reju has counseled and why they choose the wrong guy. It also has plenty of biblical reasons why the men they chose were bad choices and what the Bible has to say about such a thing. It left me beginning to feel as if there are no perfect men out there (and there's not) but toward the end it does leave encouragement and some guidelines of things to look for in a potential mate.
I've been married thirty years and I think Deepak Reju would've told Steve and me to wait to begin dating. Why? Because Steve was a new Christian. He'd come to Christ four months before I met him and we were married four months after that. But that said, upon being saved Steve immediately felt the call to go into ministry and he dived head-on into that goal. Literally. So he was doing a lot of Bible study, growing as a Christian, and that (according to the encouragement part of Deepak Reju's book) is a good thing. Steve is far from perfect, but then neither am I. We're both human. Both totally sold out to God, but still human.
I think this is a great book for young single women to read and I think it even would be good for my son to read as the woman he's dating is a brand-spanking new Christian. In fact, he led her to Christ less than a month ago. But this book is geared toward women and their choices and my son wouldn't relate.
I am going to give my copy to my daughter as the guy she's kind of sort of dating has major anger issues. And I'll pray she takes the advice, Scripture, and wisdom in the book to heart, learn from it, and at least take the time to pray about her decisions and maybe wait for the guy God has waiting in the wings.
Recommended for single women everywhere--in a relationship or not.
I was given a copy of the book free. All opinions are my own.
November 14, 2017
As a married woman, I can't relate with this book. However, that said, this book is a 4 star book that is great for those Christian women who are single and looking for their Mr. Right. Deepak Reju creates a well thought out, well researched book that will help those seeking their Mr. Right.
Reju creates a book that is unique and filled with different types of guys and what they are like. Waiting for the one that God has in mind for you is not always a bad thing. In fact, I was a single mom for 8 years before God introduced me to my husband and showed me that he was the one for me. His timing might not be our timing, but when you are looking for your other half, then you just might have to wait awhile.
Overall, this is a 4 stars. I like the way the author created this book, but, like I said, it's not for me, since I'm happily married now to the one that God picked for me. But, if you are someone who is single and looking, then grab this book. You may find just what you need to do within it's pages. Great job, Mr. Reju!
*Cafinated Reads received a complimentary copy of this book from LitFuse Blog Tours and was under no obligation to post a review, positive or negative.*
Reju creates a book that is unique and filled with different types of guys and what they are like. Waiting for the one that God has in mind for you is not always a bad thing. In fact, I was a single mom for 8 years before God introduced me to my husband and showed me that he was the one for me. His timing might not be our timing, but when you are looking for your other half, then you just might have to wait awhile.
Overall, this is a 4 stars. I like the way the author created this book, but, like I said, it's not for me, since I'm happily married now to the one that God picked for me. But, if you are someone who is single and looking, then grab this book. You may find just what you need to do within it's pages. Great job, Mr. Reju!
*Cafinated Reads received a complimentary copy of this book from LitFuse Blog Tours and was under no obligation to post a review, positive or negative.*
December 31, 2023
Short, sweet, and to the point but it still took me six months to with through because there was just a lot to process. I do recommend it though.
November 3, 2019
I'd typically write this off as another corny Christian dating book that I don't have use for, but I was surprised how solid and helpful this book was. When I did find myself having a use for it, I saw how hard it is to answer, "Am I dating the wrong guy?" objectively when blinded by emotion and attraction. That's where Reju comes in with wise, pastoral, biblical advice to help Christians evaluate who they're dating and dissuade them from settling.
I'll acknowledge the potential eye-roll factor: this is a man who wrote a dating book aimed at women. But he's writing from his experience as a pastor, where his counseling sessions frequently show a pattern of women (yes, specifically women) who overlook red flags, choose to settle, and end up heartbroken or in bad marriages. He draws from the situations of women he has counseled and wrote chapters on each type of "wrong guy" (ten examples).
It's a practical, tightly constructed book, and the author did what he set out to do, hence the five stars. In the oversaturated world of Christian dating books, this one should have a lot more attention than it does.
Let's connect: Blog | Bookstagram | Twitter | Facebook
I'll acknowledge the potential eye-roll factor: this is a man who wrote a dating book aimed at women. But he's writing from his experience as a pastor, where his counseling sessions frequently show a pattern of women (yes, specifically women) who overlook red flags, choose to settle, and end up heartbroken or in bad marriages. He draws from the situations of women he has counseled and wrote chapters on each type of "wrong guy" (ten examples).
It's a practical, tightly constructed book, and the author did what he set out to do, hence the five stars. In the oversaturated world of Christian dating books, this one should have a lot more attention than it does.
Let's connect: Blog | Bookstagram | Twitter | Facebook
December 3, 2024
I read this book with a few ladies from my small group and wow! What an impactful read.
I felt so seen in the stories of the women who “settle” and in the descriptions the author gives for WHY we settle.
I love that the whole premise of the book is focused on Christ. We are not guaranteed marriage or a husband or children in this life. The author calls it like it is and doesn’t hold back, but reminds us throughout of God’s grace, mercy, compassion, and the ultimate act of love: Christ’ crucifixion.
We all cried reading this book and I cannot put into words how highly I recommend it for other single Christian women out there who feel isolated, left out, forgotten, or feel like they need to settle on a guy because of XYZ. Highly recommend!
I felt so seen in the stories of the women who “settle” and in the descriptions the author gives for WHY we settle.
I love that the whole premise of the book is focused on Christ. We are not guaranteed marriage or a husband or children in this life. The author calls it like it is and doesn’t hold back, but reminds us throughout of God’s grace, mercy, compassion, and the ultimate act of love: Christ’ crucifixion.
We all cried reading this book and I cannot put into words how highly I recommend it for other single Christian women out there who feel isolated, left out, forgotten, or feel like they need to settle on a guy because of XYZ. Highly recommend!
November 9, 2017
My Thoughts:
I have many thoughts!
I am 53, and have been married almost 35 years. I married the wrong guy but have stayed in the marriage despite the hardship. I was 18 when I married. Many things came to “light” in the first year of marriage, but by then a baby had arrived, and then another baby two years later. We’ve had some good times but have had some awful times. At age 18, I was not mature enough to make a decision regarding serious relationships, much less marriage. Plus, I married a young man who was hiding his “other life.” This “other life” came out after we were married in what I will call confessions. (I could write a book about my own life.)
I wanted to read, She’s Got The Wrong Guy, because I enjoy reading subjects from a variety of genres.
I want to clarify:
The reading audience is for women.
The main message is for women who are dating.
The book does not disclose help for women already married.
The book is not intended for women who are not looking for a Christian husband.
In part one, Reju reminds us of the culture of our era. Dating has changed dramatically from previous generations. The current generation utilizes social media to find a dating partner. But, Reju made a valid point in stating people, “hide behind a screen.” This is a point that people know but need reminding of. People always put forward their best, and behind a screen they can project whatever they wish.
In part two (chapters 5-14), Reju begins listing several different types of wrong guys. Some examples of wrong guys: “The Control Freak”, The Angry Man”, “The Lone Ranger”, and “The Passive Man.”
In part three, a chapter on breaking up with the bad guy, being patient for the right guy, and the final chapter on grace for the current situation.
I feel this is a good book for a single woman. Read it cover to cover or as a reference book. It is a good book to read and discuss with other female friends.
However, there are a few things I did not like. Chapter 11 is “The Lone Ranger.” In this chapter, a couple is introduced where she is the outgoing type and he is the reserved type. She doesn’t understand why he is not “more” friendly with people at church. She wants him to have a strong interest in involvement at church beyond just attending. He is not interested in staying after church for longer than a few minutes. She is put off and wants to have a conversation about his priorities.
Jonathan is a loner. He doesn’t see the need for others, and because of that, he doesn’t do the hard work of developing deep, meaningful Christian relationships. When he gets together with friends, they talk about work, sports, and weather, but no one asks any deeper questions. Real Christian love is not comfortable, but is willing to be engaged with one another and take risks. Genuine Christian love is not convenient, but is willing to be inconvenienced for the sake of Christ…Jonathan does not see the need for discipling or accountability. Page 96.
Reju states, “Jonathan doesn’t value Christian relationships.” Page 97.
There may be other problems with this situation than, “Jonathan doesn’t value relationships.” For example: he may not be interested period in staying after church, he wants to go home. What might help is one Christian male friend who will hang out with Jonathan, like play golf together or watch sports. Jonathan may be the type of personality that is never going to be interested in the small group (several people in a group considered to be small-12 or less.) He is more one on one. Another problem is Jonathan may have intimacy issues. He is holding back in revealing any deeper part of him. He may hold back on intimacy with all people. Another problem is Jonathan is probably an introvert. He is not comfortable in a large group for long periods of time. He needs time afterwards to recharge quietly. And my last observation, just because people hang out at church afterwards or even attend small groups, this does not mean they are spiritually deep. Those who are apart of hanging out like to talk. What they talk about may or may not be spiritual in nature. Reju explains it is important to have accountability. When people are in relationships with other Christians there is encouragement for growth which includes accountability. In theory I believe this. But this is not always the case. Real accountability comes from reading and studying God’s Word.
Reju makes a strong point: the emphasis of our lives is not to get married but to worship God. The relationship we have with God is the most important relationship we will have. Getting married is secondary.
Final Thoughts:
I have observed married couples and found a few things that I believe are important.
1. The couple see each other at eye level. I do not mean physically at eye level. But both have a mutual respect and admiration for one another. When a person respects another, they are not going to overspend money or betray.
2. Compatibility. This encompasses several things. For example, is one a neat freak and the other messy? One will eventually blow-up or rebel. However, other factors are important: political and religious beliefs, money matters, career (some careers require long work hours), and children (how to raise the children).
3. Sex and affection. For some men sex is affection. And an important factor, will one partner have a stronger interest in sex more than the other?
4. Common interests. Does the couple have at least one thing they like to do together. For example, playing sports or watching sports.
Paperback book courtesy of New Growth Press and Litfuse Publicity Group.
I have many thoughts!
I am 53, and have been married almost 35 years. I married the wrong guy but have stayed in the marriage despite the hardship. I was 18 when I married. Many things came to “light” in the first year of marriage, but by then a baby had arrived, and then another baby two years later. We’ve had some good times but have had some awful times. At age 18, I was not mature enough to make a decision regarding serious relationships, much less marriage. Plus, I married a young man who was hiding his “other life.” This “other life” came out after we were married in what I will call confessions. (I could write a book about my own life.)
I wanted to read, She’s Got The Wrong Guy, because I enjoy reading subjects from a variety of genres.
I want to clarify:
The reading audience is for women.
The main message is for women who are dating.
The book does not disclose help for women already married.
The book is not intended for women who are not looking for a Christian husband.
In part one, Reju reminds us of the culture of our era. Dating has changed dramatically from previous generations. The current generation utilizes social media to find a dating partner. But, Reju made a valid point in stating people, “hide behind a screen.” This is a point that people know but need reminding of. People always put forward their best, and behind a screen they can project whatever they wish.
In part two (chapters 5-14), Reju begins listing several different types of wrong guys. Some examples of wrong guys: “The Control Freak”, The Angry Man”, “The Lone Ranger”, and “The Passive Man.”
In part three, a chapter on breaking up with the bad guy, being patient for the right guy, and the final chapter on grace for the current situation.
I feel this is a good book for a single woman. Read it cover to cover or as a reference book. It is a good book to read and discuss with other female friends.
However, there are a few things I did not like. Chapter 11 is “The Lone Ranger.” In this chapter, a couple is introduced where she is the outgoing type and he is the reserved type. She doesn’t understand why he is not “more” friendly with people at church. She wants him to have a strong interest in involvement at church beyond just attending. He is not interested in staying after church for longer than a few minutes. She is put off and wants to have a conversation about his priorities.
Jonathan is a loner. He doesn’t see the need for others, and because of that, he doesn’t do the hard work of developing deep, meaningful Christian relationships. When he gets together with friends, they talk about work, sports, and weather, but no one asks any deeper questions. Real Christian love is not comfortable, but is willing to be engaged with one another and take risks. Genuine Christian love is not convenient, but is willing to be inconvenienced for the sake of Christ…Jonathan does not see the need for discipling or accountability. Page 96.
Reju states, “Jonathan doesn’t value Christian relationships.” Page 97.
There may be other problems with this situation than, “Jonathan doesn’t value relationships.” For example: he may not be interested period in staying after church, he wants to go home. What might help is one Christian male friend who will hang out with Jonathan, like play golf together or watch sports. Jonathan may be the type of personality that is never going to be interested in the small group (several people in a group considered to be small-12 or less.) He is more one on one. Another problem is Jonathan may have intimacy issues. He is holding back in revealing any deeper part of him. He may hold back on intimacy with all people. Another problem is Jonathan is probably an introvert. He is not comfortable in a large group for long periods of time. He needs time afterwards to recharge quietly. And my last observation, just because people hang out at church afterwards or even attend small groups, this does not mean they are spiritually deep. Those who are apart of hanging out like to talk. What they talk about may or may not be spiritual in nature. Reju explains it is important to have accountability. When people are in relationships with other Christians there is encouragement for growth which includes accountability. In theory I believe this. But this is not always the case. Real accountability comes from reading and studying God’s Word.
Reju makes a strong point: the emphasis of our lives is not to get married but to worship God. The relationship we have with God is the most important relationship we will have. Getting married is secondary.
Final Thoughts:
I have observed married couples and found a few things that I believe are important.
1. The couple see each other at eye level. I do not mean physically at eye level. But both have a mutual respect and admiration for one another. When a person respects another, they are not going to overspend money or betray.
2. Compatibility. This encompasses several things. For example, is one a neat freak and the other messy? One will eventually blow-up or rebel. However, other factors are important: political and religious beliefs, money matters, career (some careers require long work hours), and children (how to raise the children).
3. Sex and affection. For some men sex is affection. And an important factor, will one partner have a stronger interest in sex more than the other?
4. Common interests. Does the couple have at least one thing they like to do together. For example, playing sports or watching sports.
Paperback book courtesy of New Growth Press and Litfuse Publicity Group.
April 16, 2020
11/10 would recommend.
Biblically supported. Easy to read. Insightful and eye opening. It’s incredible how a man was the one to write this. What a gift. I’d recommend BOTH men and women to read this book—men for when they don’t want to be the wrong man; and women who are struggling, waiting, and in pursuit of a real Christian man and what that looks like.
Biblically supported. Easy to read. Insightful and eye opening. It’s incredible how a man was the one to write this. What a gift. I’d recommend BOTH men and women to read this book—men for when they don’t want to be the wrong man; and women who are struggling, waiting, and in pursuit of a real Christian man and what that looks like.
August 6, 2025
This book is theologically sound but will be a difficult read for many single Christians desiring marriage because it hits close to home. Intended for a female audience but helpful for men also for honest self examination if they fall into the “ditch” categories.
November 4, 2017
When I received an email notifying me of the release of Deepak Reju's latest book, She's Got the Wrong Guy, my interest was very much piqued. Being one with poor experiences in dating and not marrying until the old age of 26 (at least it seems old when you're single in the church), I had an inkling this book would be profound and my hunch was right. Reju beings the book by stating, ". . . in the midst of the contemporary challenges to dating and marriage, the greatest need for a single woman is to ground her life in Christ," (pg. 1 ). I couldn't agree more with this sentiment and realized that it is true even for me although my relationship status is different.
This book is divided into three parts titled, From Problems to Faith, Am I Dating the Wrong Guy? and The Quest for A Godly Man. A majority of the book explores 10 different types of guys women encounter while dating that make poor choices for a mate. Some of the types of guys mentioned include The Control Freak, The Unbeliever, The Angry Man, The Commitment-Phobic Man and The Passive Man. I really enjoyed this section and desperately wished that this book was around during my dating days.
Reju's content is derived from his experience as a pastor and biblical counselor and he draws his examples from situations he has helped others work through. He is also a husband and a dad and as I read, I could tell that these roles have shaped his thoughts on the grey area of dating. This book is FULL of Scripture references throughout each chapter and through a tough yet tender tone, it is made patent that Reju cares deeply for his sisters in Christ and wants what is best for them when it comes to romantic relationships.
One aspect of this book that I really appreciate is Reju asks hard questions and that makes this a necessary resource. An example of this is found on page 7 where he wrote, "From the outset, it helps to be honest - as a woman, is your deepest desire for a husband, or for Christ? In a confusing world of dating, amongst the many challenges women the twenty-first century, your starting point needs to be clear dependence on Christ."
Often, there are many single women who love the Lord but due to various circumstances may not have someone to walk alongside them in the pursuit of dating and ask the hard questions. To that end, I am excited to see how this book encourages single women to pursue a man who loves Jesus more than them and encourages single men to pursue women in a way that honors God.
If you are single or have been and you love Jesus, this book is must read. She's Got the Wrong Guy is chalk full of Biblical encouragement for men and women both single and married. Reading this book is a great way to show our care for the singles in our midst, especially in the church. Encouraging the single ladies in our churches to read it and take heed is a great way to protect their hearts and help them navigate the murky waters of dating.
I received She's Got the Wrong Guy compliments of Litfuse in exchange for my honest review.
This book is divided into three parts titled, From Problems to Faith, Am I Dating the Wrong Guy? and The Quest for A Godly Man. A majority of the book explores 10 different types of guys women encounter while dating that make poor choices for a mate. Some of the types of guys mentioned include The Control Freak, The Unbeliever, The Angry Man, The Commitment-Phobic Man and The Passive Man. I really enjoyed this section and desperately wished that this book was around during my dating days.
Reju's content is derived from his experience as a pastor and biblical counselor and he draws his examples from situations he has helped others work through. He is also a husband and a dad and as I read, I could tell that these roles have shaped his thoughts on the grey area of dating. This book is FULL of Scripture references throughout each chapter and through a tough yet tender tone, it is made patent that Reju cares deeply for his sisters in Christ and wants what is best for them when it comes to romantic relationships.
One aspect of this book that I really appreciate is Reju asks hard questions and that makes this a necessary resource. An example of this is found on page 7 where he wrote, "From the outset, it helps to be honest - as a woman, is your deepest desire for a husband, or for Christ? In a confusing world of dating, amongst the many challenges women the twenty-first century, your starting point needs to be clear dependence on Christ."
Often, there are many single women who love the Lord but due to various circumstances may not have someone to walk alongside them in the pursuit of dating and ask the hard questions. To that end, I am excited to see how this book encourages single women to pursue a man who loves Jesus more than them and encourages single men to pursue women in a way that honors God.
If you are single or have been and you love Jesus, this book is must read. She's Got the Wrong Guy is chalk full of Biblical encouragement for men and women both single and married. Reading this book is a great way to show our care for the singles in our midst, especially in the church. Encouraging the single ladies in our churches to read it and take heed is a great way to protect their hearts and help them navigate the murky waters of dating.
I received She's Got the Wrong Guy compliments of Litfuse in exchange for my honest review.
January 7, 2018
I remember longing to be married and wondered if it would ever happen. It seemed like a far-off dream and I was tempted to just settle for any man. I thought that I'd never meet someone once I graduated from college so the closer I neared to graduation, the more pressure I felt. Now I obviously know God would have brought him along in his timing, but I wish this book had been there for me to read while I was in the waiting period.
Deepak Reju has written a book that single ladies and teens need to read. I mean even read it several times over your life. And married women? They need to read it too! Sometimes it's easy to forget that whole stage and those feelings that come along and this book reminded me of that time. It would also be a fantastic book to go through if you're mentoring younger women. You can easily tell through his writing that Deepak Reju has such a heart for these ladies and longs to protect their hearts. Hee doesn't want them to settle for just anyone but to wait on God's man. I absolutely love that this is written from a man to women. I think it gives women a different perspective.
I tend to be very picky in the nonfiction books I read because I don't want them to water down the Gospel or be about prosperity or any other type of non-biblical teaching. So I rely on the reviews and recommendations of the people on the back on of the cover and within the front page of the book. So I knew I had to get this book after I saw who all had read and recommended this book: Gloria Furman, Joni Eareckson Tada, David and Sally Michael, Mary K. Mohler, Elyse Fitzpatrick, and Martha Peace. There were more but I knew these ladies were Gospel-centered and wouldn't put their names on just any book!
Inside, Reju talks about how smart women settle, why they settle, and how to live differently. In Part 2, he gives characteristics of men that might be the wrong guy. He talks about the control freak, the promiscuous guy, the unchurched guy, the new convert, the unbeliever, the angry man, the lone ranger, the commitment-phobic man, the passive man, and the unteachable guy. Part 3 addresses breaking up for the glory of God and then pursuing a real Christian man. He talks about why waiting is okay and how God helps in the waiting and loneliness by giving us just enough grace for the moments that we need. One of my favorite sections was actually the conclusion as he pours out his heart and lovingly tells women to not compromise. You see his love for these ladies seeping through the pages.
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I received this book free from New Growth Press and Litfuse Publicity Group in exchange for my honest opinion of this book.
Deepak Reju has written a book that single ladies and teens need to read. I mean even read it several times over your life. And married women? They need to read it too! Sometimes it's easy to forget that whole stage and those feelings that come along and this book reminded me of that time. It would also be a fantastic book to go through if you're mentoring younger women. You can easily tell through his writing that Deepak Reju has such a heart for these ladies and longs to protect their hearts. Hee doesn't want them to settle for just anyone but to wait on God's man. I absolutely love that this is written from a man to women. I think it gives women a different perspective.
I tend to be very picky in the nonfiction books I read because I don't want them to water down the Gospel or be about prosperity or any other type of non-biblical teaching. So I rely on the reviews and recommendations of the people on the back on of the cover and within the front page of the book. So I knew I had to get this book after I saw who all had read and recommended this book: Gloria Furman, Joni Eareckson Tada, David and Sally Michael, Mary K. Mohler, Elyse Fitzpatrick, and Martha Peace. There were more but I knew these ladies were Gospel-centered and wouldn't put their names on just any book!
Inside, Reju talks about how smart women settle, why they settle, and how to live differently. In Part 2, he gives characteristics of men that might be the wrong guy. He talks about the control freak, the promiscuous guy, the unchurched guy, the new convert, the unbeliever, the angry man, the lone ranger, the commitment-phobic man, the passive man, and the unteachable guy. Part 3 addresses breaking up for the glory of God and then pursuing a real Christian man. He talks about why waiting is okay and how God helps in the waiting and loneliness by giving us just enough grace for the moments that we need. One of my favorite sections was actually the conclusion as he pours out his heart and lovingly tells women to not compromise. You see his love for these ladies seeping through the pages.
___________
I received this book free from New Growth Press and Litfuse Publicity Group in exchange for my honest opinion of this book.
November 14, 2017
I'm so glad and thankful that God gave me the right guy. I am blessed with an awesome husband, a man after God's own heart. We've been blissfully married for over 26 years. I chose to review this book because I am concerned about my 24 year old daughter who is single and wants to find the right guy to date and marry. She is smart and wise but her dating choices have not always reflected that. This book is just what I want her to read :). She's Got the Wrong Guy is divided into 3 parts: 1. From Problems to Faith, 2. Am I Dating the Wrong Guy?, and 3. The Quest for a Godly Man. Each chapter starts with relevant quotes and Scriptures. The author pulls no punches when he discusses about the ten wrong types of guys single women should avoid. The ten types are: the Control Freak, the Promiscuous Guy, the Unchurched Guy, the New Convert, the Unbeliever, the Angry Man, the Lone Ranger, the Commitment-Phobic Man, the Passive Man, the Unteachable Guy. As a pastor and counselor, Deepak Reju has heard and seen all sorts of dating and marriage problems. He shares from his experience why smart women settle, how to recognize the wrong kinds of guys (how to spot red flags), how to break up for the glory of God, what to do while you wait for the right guy, what to look for in an authentic Christian man, and how to trust God and rely on His grace for your relationship. Remember that being miserably married is worse than being miserably single. Marriage will not solve all your problems. Jesus is your only solution. Reju's story examples are relatable to single women and dating scenes in today's society. He backs up his discussion with Biblical reasons and wisdom. The practical advice and prudent insights in this book are truly valuable and must be heeded. The book is written with compassion and understanding. Choosing whom to marry is the second most important decision you'll every make (only second to your decision to trust in Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior). Choose wisely! I highly recommend this God-honoring, Christ-centered book to all single Christian women! My hope and prayer is that they (including my daughter) will neither settle nor compromise but will patiently wait for God's best for them.
~I received a free copy of this book from Litfuse Publicity Group in exchange for my honest review. All opinions are my own.
~I received a free copy of this book from Litfuse Publicity Group in exchange for my honest review. All opinions are my own.
November 13, 2017
Why I Choose this Book:
Reading the backcover blurb brings up questions I’ve asked multiple times. Plus, the book (and especially the cover) seemed interesting.
What I Thought about this Book:
I was somewhat apprehensive when I went into this book – having no clue if I’d agree with the author on any or all of the points, but also extremely eager to read the book and figure out what the author had in mind. I certainly didn’t want a book of fluff, and I don’t think anyone would accuse this book of that. Mr. Reju dove right into the thick of it, and with examples and a grace-filled tone kept the book serious and on mark the entire time.
Part 1 Talks about what some of the problems with dating are today…. Such as people look at marriage and dating differently than they used to and so everyone is kinda scrambling around trying to figure out where we fit in. Or the fact that some people have wrong motives in a relationship. Or that some people have made marriage a sort of idol in their lives. It was all very spot-on and Mr. Reju crammed a lot of info into a few pages without making it feel rushed.
Part 2 Discusses ten different types of guys to avoid dating. Mr. Reju shared examples of a couple (or sometimes two) for each of the examples. I’m guessing the examples came from people who he’d known personally or possibly even counseled (or wished he could have), but he never specifically said. The ten types include guys like The Control Freak, The Unbeliever, The Angry Man, The New Convert, and The Passive Man. Again, what was said in this section was so good and if I had friends in dating relationships that matched any of these examples I’d totally want to give them this book.
Part 3 Was very short at the end and is about finding the right (Godly) guy. It also talked about how it’s okay to wait sometimes, and that waiting is a part of life and can help build our character and turn us into the person God wants us to be.
Overall I enjoyed reading the book, learned from it, and found it really interesting.
Conclusion:
At this point, I really can’t think of anything I disagreed with in the book. It does talk quite openly about temptations that dating couples (and really anyone) have, so, therefore, I wouldn’t recommend this book to young teens without parental guidance.
Rating:
I’m giving She’s Got the Wrong Guy 4 out of 5 stars, and 8 out of 10
*I received this book from Litfuse in exchange for an honest review
Reading the backcover blurb brings up questions I’ve asked multiple times. Plus, the book (and especially the cover) seemed interesting.
What I Thought about this Book:
I was somewhat apprehensive when I went into this book – having no clue if I’d agree with the author on any or all of the points, but also extremely eager to read the book and figure out what the author had in mind. I certainly didn’t want a book of fluff, and I don’t think anyone would accuse this book of that. Mr. Reju dove right into the thick of it, and with examples and a grace-filled tone kept the book serious and on mark the entire time.
Part 1 Talks about what some of the problems with dating are today…. Such as people look at marriage and dating differently than they used to and so everyone is kinda scrambling around trying to figure out where we fit in. Or the fact that some people have wrong motives in a relationship. Or that some people have made marriage a sort of idol in their lives. It was all very spot-on and Mr. Reju crammed a lot of info into a few pages without making it feel rushed.
Part 2 Discusses ten different types of guys to avoid dating. Mr. Reju shared examples of a couple (or sometimes two) for each of the examples. I’m guessing the examples came from people who he’d known personally or possibly even counseled (or wished he could have), but he never specifically said. The ten types include guys like The Control Freak, The Unbeliever, The Angry Man, The New Convert, and The Passive Man. Again, what was said in this section was so good and if I had friends in dating relationships that matched any of these examples I’d totally want to give them this book.
Part 3 Was very short at the end and is about finding the right (Godly) guy. It also talked about how it’s okay to wait sometimes, and that waiting is a part of life and can help build our character and turn us into the person God wants us to be.
Overall I enjoyed reading the book, learned from it, and found it really interesting.
Conclusion:
At this point, I really can’t think of anything I disagreed with in the book. It does talk quite openly about temptations that dating couples (and really anyone) have, so, therefore, I wouldn’t recommend this book to young teens without parental guidance.
Rating:
I’m giving She’s Got the Wrong Guy 4 out of 5 stars, and 8 out of 10
*I received this book from Litfuse in exchange for an honest review
November 12, 2017
I am so happy that I am married and don’t have to deal with all the stress of dating. When I was dating, I would meet guys from church or through friends. In fact my husband and I met through friends. At first we didn’t like each other at all. I thought he was very quiet and worked a lot. He thought I was rude and outspoken. We began our marriage with a lot of baggage from our past and left our a very important part in our marriage. We forgot to include God in our marriage and had difficult times in our marriage because of it.
It is not uncommon to hear that a couple met online and are now dating. It can be a bit unsettling when you meet for the first time. You can be anyone you want to online, but in person your personality comes out. I have often wondered why a single woman at church is looked at differently. Some women like the idea of being single and are content to have a career and spend time with God. Others like the idea of marriage and sometimes it is hard to find the right person.
The world has become so obsessed with looks that it puts a lot of pressure on people. Men want a wife who is beautiful and thin. Women are looking for a good looking man who is a provider. With all these criteria, it looks like God has been left out. I loved how the book gave great examples of why women are settling instead of waiting for the right man who puts God first. Are women feeling pressured to marry? Do they think it defines them as more successful in life if they are married? When you settle, problems arise and your happiness is left behind and God is not first anymore in your life.
The bottom line I got from the book is to trust God, and know that He wants the best for you. Remember to put Him first and follow his direction. I think the book is a good tool to use for single women who want to have wisdom when looking for their mate.
I received a copy of this book from LitFuse. The review is my own opinion.
It is not uncommon to hear that a couple met online and are now dating. It can be a bit unsettling when you meet for the first time. You can be anyone you want to online, but in person your personality comes out. I have often wondered why a single woman at church is looked at differently. Some women like the idea of being single and are content to have a career and spend time with God. Others like the idea of marriage and sometimes it is hard to find the right person.
The world has become so obsessed with looks that it puts a lot of pressure on people. Men want a wife who is beautiful and thin. Women are looking for a good looking man who is a provider. With all these criteria, it looks like God has been left out. I loved how the book gave great examples of why women are settling instead of waiting for the right man who puts God first. Are women feeling pressured to marry? Do they think it defines them as more successful in life if they are married? When you settle, problems arise and your happiness is left behind and God is not first anymore in your life.
The bottom line I got from the book is to trust God, and know that He wants the best for you. Remember to put Him first and follow his direction. I think the book is a good tool to use for single women who want to have wisdom when looking for their mate.
I received a copy of this book from LitFuse. The review is my own opinion.
November 1, 2017
MY THOUGHTS
Dating - should be easy but it's so hard. What should you ask this stranger in order to get to know them better? What questions are most important? What should you do if things progress past the one or two dates? This book is indeed a guide to getting through those dates, those relationships that may lead to marriage. It is insightful and is full of scripture that makes you stop and think before you leap. That is most important. Not to make hasty decisions. To encourage you to fall back on your faith and let God lead you in the right direction. Sometimes we pick anyone just to feel wanted. We need that attachment. We often think what we put into a relationship is what we will get back. This leads to heartache, insecurity and a sense of failure. Women often think it's their fault when relationships fail. This in no way means the woman has failed. Perhaps a little patience, to wait for that special someone, to let the Lord lead us at the right time to the right person. It's not easy but it's worth it in the end. This book helps give guidance to making those important decisions and reading the scripture will help you to rely on the Lord to lead you in the right direction.
I would recommend this book to any woman or man who is seeking a relationship. Men have the same problems sometimes as women. This book would also be good for those who aren't ready for a relationship yet! but will in the future.
I received a copy of this book from Litfuse Publicity Group and voluntarily decided to review it.
Dating - should be easy but it's so hard. What should you ask this stranger in order to get to know them better? What questions are most important? What should you do if things progress past the one or two dates? This book is indeed a guide to getting through those dates, those relationships that may lead to marriage. It is insightful and is full of scripture that makes you stop and think before you leap. That is most important. Not to make hasty decisions. To encourage you to fall back on your faith and let God lead you in the right direction. Sometimes we pick anyone just to feel wanted. We need that attachment. We often think what we put into a relationship is what we will get back. This leads to heartache, insecurity and a sense of failure. Women often think it's their fault when relationships fail. This in no way means the woman has failed. Perhaps a little patience, to wait for that special someone, to let the Lord lead us at the right time to the right person. It's not easy but it's worth it in the end. This book helps give guidance to making those important decisions and reading the scripture will help you to rely on the Lord to lead you in the right direction.
I would recommend this book to any woman or man who is seeking a relationship. Men have the same problems sometimes as women. This book would also be good for those who aren't ready for a relationship yet! but will in the future.
I received a copy of this book from Litfuse Publicity Group and voluntarily decided to review it.
November 5, 2017
This was a fascinating book full of wonderful advice! I mainly requested to review this because I was curious what the ten types of men to avoid were and the warning signs. There was a chapter on each with a story of a woman dating this type of man and the signs of the problem to look out for, along with pointing out that the problem will only get worse after marriage since people are on their best behavior when dating. Reju first had a chapter looking at why women settle for these kinds of relationships and that some of the possibilities are the high emphasis put on marriage as the most important thing to the point where it becomes an idol, emotional baggage, love being blind, fear, etc. He reminded us that Jesus needs to be the most important and our first love. I really liked that he emphasized this and talked quite a bit about putting Jesus in the number one spot in your life. Only He can truly make us content. Reju also had a great chapter on why waiting is okay and how to wait well. I found it sad to see these women compromise their happiness, their faith and sometimes their morals just to stay with a guy in the hope that they'll get married someday, even if the guy treats you like dirt. Unfortunately, I know a couple friends who have done this and they're miserable. I highly recommend this book for all teen girls and single women and even single men as they need their eyes opened to the dating options they should avoid or, for the men, avoid becoming.
I received this book free from Litfuse Publicity in exchange for an honest review.
I received this book free from Litfuse Publicity in exchange for an honest review.
January 19, 2018
I loved this book so much. It was such an interesting perspective on relationships and what being single really means. Obviously, before I was married I was a single Christian gal. This book is perfect for women that are thinking about dating or are actively dating. We women are under such pressure to marry that we often settle for the wrong guy. Author Reju uses examples from the bible to show how mistakes can be made in pursuing a husband and how to avoid them. It also explains what women should be looking for in a guy.
The book's message is that we are to desire a relationship with God more than anyone or anything else. Marriage will only be of this life, whereas our relationship with God is for eternity. This book makes a really good point to remind us that our only need is God.
Some of the types of wrong guys the book talks about are the control freak, the Christian in name only, the angry man, and the immature Christian, as well as countless others. The insights given in this book are completely genuine and entirely priceless. This book would have really saved me a few times when I was dating.
The book also mentions the role of the church in supporting singles and dating couples. These types need wish counsel and the church really needs to work on that role in my opinion,
Recommended for single women whether they are in a relationship or not. I think women of all ages, lifestyles, and backgrounds.
Disclaimer: I received a copy of the book in exchange for an honest and unbiased review. All opinions are my own.
The book's message is that we are to desire a relationship with God more than anyone or anything else. Marriage will only be of this life, whereas our relationship with God is for eternity. This book makes a really good point to remind us that our only need is God.
Some of the types of wrong guys the book talks about are the control freak, the Christian in name only, the angry man, and the immature Christian, as well as countless others. The insights given in this book are completely genuine and entirely priceless. This book would have really saved me a few times when I was dating.
The book also mentions the role of the church in supporting singles and dating couples. These types need wish counsel and the church really needs to work on that role in my opinion,
Recommended for single women whether they are in a relationship or not. I think women of all ages, lifestyles, and backgrounds.
Disclaimer: I received a copy of the book in exchange for an honest and unbiased review. All opinions are my own.
September 12, 2022
I think the book was filled with practical wisdom and included a lot of realistic and relevant examples of women who have experienced 'unnecessary pain' due to their partners. It went through 10 characteristics to be wary of when looking for someone to marry and to look out for when dating. It provided biblical context to back the claims for these values and instead what you can or should look for in a godly man. It also encourages women to seek out relationships with the right God-fearing motivation, to be unwavered from social pressures and ideals and willing to wait on God - for their spiritual health is at stake here. However, for those that have ended up with unwise marriages even after seeing all the red flags (or being warned by friends and family), the book briefly comments on how God's grace sustains and grows women to endure and trust in Him.
Personally, I thought the book was a bit one-sided. One-sided because the book assumes that the women are great/perfect and the guy is always the issue. Which I think if the reader is a woman she has to keep this in mind to maintain a humble, balanced view while reading the book.
I'm not sure I agree with the whole: 'don't settle for less' idea in general. Applied to this book it makes sense because the examples it gives are a bit extreme, and they are very bright red flags to look out for. But in the opposite way of thinking it could just make some women's unrealistic high standards even higher. There's some good wisdom principles in it though that I appreciated
Personally, I thought the book was a bit one-sided. One-sided because the book assumes that the women are great/perfect and the guy is always the issue. Which I think if the reader is a woman she has to keep this in mind to maintain a humble, balanced view while reading the book.
I'm not sure I agree with the whole: 'don't settle for less' idea in general. Applied to this book it makes sense because the examples it gives are a bit extreme, and they are very bright red flags to look out for. But in the opposite way of thinking it could just make some women's unrealistic high standards even higher. There's some good wisdom principles in it though that I appreciated
January 6, 2018
If you turn on your radio at any given time you will likely hear a woman singing about unrequited love. Many of the songs are specifically about the ways in which men have wronged women. Cheating, lying, and generally acting like a child seems to fill the airways. Secular and Christian women alike all bemoan dating the average (even Christian) man.
Honestly it can seem a little overwhelming.
In Deepak Reju's book She's Got the Wrong Guy, he discusses why women settle for guys that are never going to meet their needs. Reju breaks down the 10 most common types of "wrong guys" that women settle for and how to spot them. He also talks extensively about the kind of guy that Christian women should be looking for instead. The thing that really got me about She's Got the Wrong Guy is the fact that Reju does a great job of pointing the reader back to Christ. What is the ultimate goal of dating? The same goal as everything else for the follower of Christ, to glorify Him. Reju just puts it in better perspective than most.
Overall, I give She's Got the Wrong Guy a solid A+. I think that Reju's work would be a fabulous book for a single women's Bible study group. It would also be a good book for a young woman that is about to go off to college and really enter the dating world. It might also be a good book for parents to read if they are looking to help guide their older daughters in how to approach dating.
Honestly it can seem a little overwhelming.
In Deepak Reju's book She's Got the Wrong Guy, he discusses why women settle for guys that are never going to meet their needs. Reju breaks down the 10 most common types of "wrong guys" that women settle for and how to spot them. He also talks extensively about the kind of guy that Christian women should be looking for instead. The thing that really got me about She's Got the Wrong Guy is the fact that Reju does a great job of pointing the reader back to Christ. What is the ultimate goal of dating? The same goal as everything else for the follower of Christ, to glorify Him. Reju just puts it in better perspective than most.
Overall, I give She's Got the Wrong Guy a solid A+. I think that Reju's work would be a fabulous book for a single women's Bible study group. It would also be a good book for a young woman that is about to go off to college and really enter the dating world. It might also be a good book for parents to read if they are looking to help guide their older daughters in how to approach dating.
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