What do you think?
Rate this book
The Mirror
Notable Book of the Year, New York Times Book Review
This is the story of Agnes La Grange, a beautiful young woman who emigrates as a housekeeper to South Africa in 1920. With a determination to make a future of her own and a love of men that does not leave her in desperate need of them, Agnes constructs a life beyond the conventions of colonial society. Written in her own fresh and unguarded voice, The Mirror is a fictional memoir, telling the story of the essential female, what she must do to survive, and how little the cost has changed over time.
This is the story of Agnes La Grange, a beautiful young woman who emigrates as a housekeeper to South Africa in 1920. With a determination to make a future of her own and a love of men that does not leave her in desperate need of them, Agnes constructs a life beyond the conventions of colonial society. Written in her own fresh and unguarded voice, The Mirror is a fictional memoir, telling the story of the essential female, what she must do to survive, and how little the cost has changed over time.
146 pages, ebook
First published January 1, 1997
2 people are currently reading
88 people want to read
About the author
Lynn Freed
18 books53 followersLynn Freed is a South African novelist and academic.
She came to the U.S. first as a foreign exchange student, and then went on to receive an M.A. and Ph.D. in English Literature from Columbia University. She taught at Bennington College, Saint Mary's College of California, the University of California, Berkeley, the University of Oregon, the University of Montana, and the University of Texas in Austin.
Ms Freed's short fiction, memoirs and essays have appeared in The New Yorker, Harper's,[1] The Atlantic Monthly, Southwest Review, The Georgia Review, the Michigan Quarterly Review, Tin House, The New York Times, The Washington Post, Newsday, Mirabella, House Beautiful, House & Garden, and Vogue Magazine.
Her work is widely translated and anthologized, and has been listed in Best American Short Stories and in The O. Henry Award Prize Stories.
Ms. Freed is Professor of English at the University of California, Davis, and lives in Northern California.[2]
She came to the U.S. first as a foreign exchange student, and then went on to receive an M.A. and Ph.D. in English Literature from Columbia University. She taught at Bennington College, Saint Mary's College of California, the University of California, Berkeley, the University of Oregon, the University of Montana, and the University of Texas in Austin.
Ms Freed's short fiction, memoirs and essays have appeared in The New Yorker, Harper's,[1] The Atlantic Monthly, Southwest Review, The Georgia Review, the Michigan Quarterly Review, Tin House, The New York Times, The Washington Post, Newsday, Mirabella, House Beautiful, House & Garden, and Vogue Magazine.
Her work is widely translated and anthologized, and has been listed in Best American Short Stories and in The O. Henry Award Prize Stories.
Ms. Freed is Professor of English at the University of California, Davis, and lives in Northern California.[2]
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews
June 5, 2020
This would be a story of what it might be like to be a woman, without means, who disregards all social rules - listening only to her own immediate desires, yet organizes her money and power with almost military plan and precision - if such a woman were allowed to exist.
In the years following WWI, Agnes La Grange (a name she made up) arrives as a young Englishwoman in Durban, South Africa to write her own life.
She has no use for fairy tales, or perhaps she never heard them. Agnes repels any approaching white knights, or uses them to fill a gap, never available to be swept off her feet.
She’ll sweep herself, thank you.
“And how could I tell him it was impossible to think of a man like him wanting a woman like me in any way that would have her wanting him back? He’d take over all my hope for myself, his sort of man, granting me what he thought I wanted, which would only leave me wanting what he couldn’t give.”
Not dispassionate, just calculating. Is the message that if one can ignore oxytocin, biology is not destiny?
I remember when my daughter was born, how acutely and involuntarily my brain changed. My previous uninterrupted professional drive seemed to melt into a constant desire to be with my baby. I sometimes felt the observer as I watched the small peptides and neurotransmitters, that lead us to the actions necessary for the species to survive, take over my priorities.
Well, this didn’t happen to our dear Agnes. Her baby “screams” and she immediately thinks of what a hassle this is, and how it’ll be around for 20 years and can she pass it off to someone else to hold?
Neither is she the least bit interested in the young men that flirt with her, knowing the risks of their desires:
“..the beautiful young men….they would bend me to themselves, these young men, require a certain sort of looking back at them, and a laughing into the future. Oh no.”
Remembering an encounter on a train after the Great War and what might have happened had she not escaped:
“And there I’d be now, married...and making his tea, and him correcting the way I talk, the way I lay the table. And nothing gone to waste to his way of thinking.”
Much preferred was the “old man” who needs only to look at her. Like a mirror. Enjoying her own beauty as he does. Or the random act - with a sailor or three - than meeting the ongoing demands of a needy man.
With brutal honesty and self regard, she tries to give her daughter the message:
“...there was happiness to be had only in moments, and those came not by wishing and thinking, but by knowing them when you found them.”
And content at the end, reliving her life, not longing for anyone (or anything):
“It is myself I am with day and night, even in my dreams.”
An odd book, wonderfully bound like an old suitcase, or bakelite, with rounded corners and photos of Durban in the early 20th century scattered throughout. A diversion.
***************
An unnecessary addendum.
The opening page has the poem "So We'll Go No More a'Roving"
Prescient, right?..No roving about!
So I re-wrote the second verse (apologies to Lord Byron):
So We’ll go no more a-roving
So late into the night,
Though the heart still be as loving,
And the moon still be as bright.
For the virus cometh widely
And it, blind, takes out the breath,
And the heart way well stop beating
And so demand its rest.
Though the night was made for loving,
And the day returns too soon,
Yet we’ll go no more a-roving
By the light of the moon.
In the years following WWI, Agnes La Grange (a name she made up) arrives as a young Englishwoman in Durban, South Africa to write her own life.
She has no use for fairy tales, or perhaps she never heard them. Agnes repels any approaching white knights, or uses them to fill a gap, never available to be swept off her feet.
She’ll sweep herself, thank you.
“And how could I tell him it was impossible to think of a man like him wanting a woman like me in any way that would have her wanting him back? He’d take over all my hope for myself, his sort of man, granting me what he thought I wanted, which would only leave me wanting what he couldn’t give.”
Not dispassionate, just calculating. Is the message that if one can ignore oxytocin, biology is not destiny?
I remember when my daughter was born, how acutely and involuntarily my brain changed. My previous uninterrupted professional drive seemed to melt into a constant desire to be with my baby. I sometimes felt the observer as I watched the small peptides and neurotransmitters, that lead us to the actions necessary for the species to survive, take over my priorities.
Well, this didn’t happen to our dear Agnes. Her baby “screams” and she immediately thinks of what a hassle this is, and how it’ll be around for 20 years and can she pass it off to someone else to hold?
Neither is she the least bit interested in the young men that flirt with her, knowing the risks of their desires:
“..the beautiful young men….they would bend me to themselves, these young men, require a certain sort of looking back at them, and a laughing into the future. Oh no.”
Remembering an encounter on a train after the Great War and what might have happened had she not escaped:
“And there I’d be now, married...and making his tea, and him correcting the way I talk, the way I lay the table. And nothing gone to waste to his way of thinking.”
Much preferred was the “old man” who needs only to look at her. Like a mirror. Enjoying her own beauty as he does. Or the random act - with a sailor or three - than meeting the ongoing demands of a needy man.
With brutal honesty and self regard, she tries to give her daughter the message:
“...there was happiness to be had only in moments, and those came not by wishing and thinking, but by knowing them when you found them.”
And content at the end, reliving her life, not longing for anyone (or anything):
“It is myself I am with day and night, even in my dreams.”
An odd book, wonderfully bound like an old suitcase, or bakelite, with rounded corners and photos of Durban in the early 20th century scattered throughout. A diversion.
***************
An unnecessary addendum.
The opening page has the poem "So We'll Go No More a'Roving"
Prescient, right?..No roving about!
So I re-wrote the second verse (apologies to Lord Byron):
So We’ll go no more a-roving
So late into the night,
Though the heart still be as loving,
And the moon still be as bright.
For the virus cometh widely
And it, blind, takes out the breath,
And the heart way well stop beating
And so demand its rest.
Though the night was made for loving,
And the day returns too soon,
Yet we’ll go no more a-roving
By the light of the moon.
February 20, 2011
Review Snippet; "This book is enjoyable enough, but I wouldn't race to buy it. I found this book on a "chuck-out" pile at the markets and I think this is the best situation in which to buy this book, at a cheap price for the decent entertainment it returns.
The female protagonist, Agnes, is satisfying. How lovely it is to read about a single mother in the 1920's who is strong and determined and is making her way, all on her own. I'll admit, she isn't the most likable person. If I was to meet her, I probably wouldn't like her too much, but you cannot help but respect her and respect the future she is building for herself."
Full Review; http://bookywooks.blogspot.com/2011/0...
The female protagonist, Agnes, is satisfying. How lovely it is to read about a single mother in the 1920's who is strong and determined and is making her way, all on her own. I'll admit, she isn't the most likable person. If I was to meet her, I probably wouldn't like her too much, but you cannot help but respect her and respect the future she is building for herself."
Full Review; http://bookywooks.blogspot.com/2011/0...
September 26, 2010
Woman gets by with what she got. Ten million human beings out there and they're all living the same life. We're not like snowflakes after all.
It was an okay novel but okay novels should be thrown down the nearest disused mineshaft.
It was an okay novel but okay novels should be thrown down the nearest disused mineshaft.
December 12, 2013
I’m not sure why there are a lot of negative reviews of Lynn Freed’s The Mirror. I think it’s an astonishing – and often mesmerizing – novel. I first heard of this novel while scanning The Salon.com Reader’s Guide to Contemporary Authors. In one section, Michael Cunningham listed five books that he thought deserved recognition, one of which was The Mirror. He said that in a parallel universe, Lynn Freed is a huge bestseller and The Mirror is one of the most talked-about novels of 1997. I wouldn’t go that far but I thought it was a thoroughly engrossing read from beginning to end.
This novel rivals the best books ON women written BY women – what women are like (to the extent you can generalize, of course), how they think, what drives them; that is, why do they behave like “that”? Well, this novel contains all the answers you’ve always been looking for as it traces the life of one particular woman – Agnes La Grange – from late teens to her seventies (eighties?).
One scene says it all: Agnes has a major argument with her teenaged daughter Allegra (or Leah – the girl has two names, something all women desire apparently). She yells at her for her embarrassing crush on an older man. Agnes calls her “Vixen!” to which Allegra responds with “Trollop!” Allegra turns to run up the stairs but Agnes grabs her by the train of her dress, ripping it apart at the seams with buttons flying. And Agnes’s thought was: “And even as she looked back to see the damage, and I wanting to tear the whole dress apart now and her with it, I was reminding myself to use French seams in the future, and to sew in the lining too.”
Hilarious stuff!
I always suspected women were thinking of multiple things – even mundane things – at once, even at these most horrific of moments. So, when you’re being yelled at by your wife/girlfriend for buying the wrong sandwich spread (i.e., she wanted sunflower butter not almond butter, you idiot) from Safeway, rest assured that a part of her is thinking about the Amalfi coast in Southern Italy, Jude Law’s collarbone, and the pot roast in the oven.
This novel rivals the best books ON women written BY women – what women are like (to the extent you can generalize, of course), how they think, what drives them; that is, why do they behave like “that”? Well, this novel contains all the answers you’ve always been looking for as it traces the life of one particular woman – Agnes La Grange – from late teens to her seventies (eighties?).
One scene says it all: Agnes has a major argument with her teenaged daughter Allegra (or Leah – the girl has two names, something all women desire apparently). She yells at her for her embarrassing crush on an older man. Agnes calls her “Vixen!” to which Allegra responds with “Trollop!” Allegra turns to run up the stairs but Agnes grabs her by the train of her dress, ripping it apart at the seams with buttons flying. And Agnes’s thought was: “And even as she looked back to see the damage, and I wanting to tear the whole dress apart now and her with it, I was reminding myself to use French seams in the future, and to sew in the lining too.”
Hilarious stuff!
I always suspected women were thinking of multiple things – even mundane things – at once, even at these most horrific of moments. So, when you’re being yelled at by your wife/girlfriend for buying the wrong sandwich spread (i.e., she wanted sunflower butter not almond butter, you idiot) from Safeway, rest assured that a part of her is thinking about the Amalfi coast in Southern Italy, Jude Law’s collarbone, and the pot roast in the oven.
January 28, 2020
It was a good book, though for the life of me can't tell you why.
The main character was had a bitchy attitude and was lacking when it came to heart. She couldn't be honest with herself, and was damn stubborn... I guess thats why I could relate to her..
interesting read though..
The main character was had a bitchy attitude and was lacking when it came to heart. She couldn't be honest with herself, and was damn stubborn... I guess thats why I could relate to her..
interesting read though..
August 17, 2007
Poetic, fluid, sanguine.
July 24, 2019
I can imagine an alternate universe where this book is really popular and well loved, it is the type of story I assume masses would appreciate but in this alternate universe, I still wouldn’t love this book. It’s about Agnes but I couldn’t tell you who she is beyond her actions. The book lacks a deep delve into her psyche, which was necessary for this almost character study of a novel. The story is predictable and unbelievable. Despite the clear location markers throughout the story, I felt like they could easily be replaced and the story could take place anywhere in the world. It wasn’t grounded. The writing is scattered and lacks cohesion, I found myself having to reread certain passages to make sense of them. It doesn’t take time on certain scenes and instances where it should have, it moves on unceremoniously from point to point. The thing that irritated me the most in my reading experience was that the author kept mentioning books and stories throughout. “If this were a book”, “if this were a story”, we get it! I wish I could remove all comparisons to fiction from the entire tale itself. Beyond that, the book is heavy handed and leaves little to the reader, which I never enjoy. I gave it two stars for the fact that I was able to read it in a day, it’s paced well, and the attempt at constructing the feminine image and the overarching theme of the things women go through/ endure comes across fairly okay. I don’t recommend picking it up but if you come across it, read it.
January 12, 2025
Οι κριτικοί επαίνεσαν τη Φριντ για την αιχμηρή, ενδοσκοπική πρόζα της και την ικανότητά της να αποτυπώνει τις αποχρώσεις της καθημερινής ζωής με βαθιά ενσυναίσθηση. Συνιστώ ανεπιφύλακτα το βιβλίο γιατί μέσα υπάρχει η συγκλονιστική εξερεύνηση των οικογενειακών δεσμών, η ανακάλυψη του εαυτού και η συναισθηματική πολυπλοκότητα του να μεγαλώνεις.Η ήσυχη, στοχαστική φύση του μυθιστορήματος καλεί τους αναγνώστες να αναλογιστούν πώς η μνήμη διαμορφώνει την ταυτότητα, καθιστώντας το μια πλούσια εμπειρία που προκαλεί σκέψη.
June 28, 2019
What kept me in this book was the writing...I found it hypnotic. The main character was extremely self absorbed' The story as a whole was a combination of GONE WITH THE WIND & a Somerset Maugham story
December 16, 2018
Short but intriguing book.
January 15, 2025
I first read this book in my teens almost 20 years ago. And it still lives vividly in my heart and head. Since then I have reread it a few times and always love it more
February 18, 2016
Agnes LaGrange gives today’s modern woman a run for her money. In 1920 she flees an unpromising future and arrives in Durban, South Africa to be housekeeper to a gentleman she refers to as “the Old Jew.” He presents her with a mirror, along with his advances, and regarding their reflections in the mirror she falls in love with the power of her own beauty.
Armed with ambition and no thought for social mores of the day, she rises from housekeeper to hotel owner, acquiring property and wealth and a string of lovers.
Freed paints a portrait of a not exactly likable character, but as a woman of her day refusing to be dependent on a man for her happiness and self-worth, Agnes deserves admiration.
Armed with ambition and no thought for social mores of the day, she rises from housekeeper to hotel owner, acquiring property and wealth and a string of lovers.
Freed paints a portrait of a not exactly likable character, but as a woman of her day refusing to be dependent on a man for her happiness and self-worth, Agnes deserves admiration.
September 9, 2016
The Mirror is a snapshot of a life, a look at the journey that takes Agnes La Grange from servant to self-made woman. Using her intelligence as well as her beauty, Agnes makes a life for herself in South Africa from almost nothing. She is a flawed protagonist, at times selfish and foolish, but the novel is enriched by Agnes' imperfections. The Mirror speaks eloquently of a woman's struggle between family and self, between convention and desire. In a way, the book leaves one sad at its conclusion -- it's not as much an escape from reality as it is a reflection of the sometimes unattractive side of human relationships. A thoughtful and provocative read.
November 2, 2010
This book is a nice escape.
This is a very well-rounded story that takes you back in time.
It's another time & place in South Africa with a young girl trying to 'find herself'. This young girl becomes a woman and sees the mirror of herself in her own daughter. History clearly repeats. Growth and renewal comes out of this story of relationships. It is a lovely story and a quick read. There are some wonderful lines...very well written...a nice escape as any reader will recognize people and thoughts (in our current every day lives).
This is a very well-rounded story that takes you back in time.
It's another time & place in South Africa with a young girl trying to 'find herself'. This young girl becomes a woman and sees the mirror of herself in her own daughter. History clearly repeats. Growth and renewal comes out of this story of relationships. It is a lovely story and a quick read. There are some wonderful lines...very well written...a nice escape as any reader will recognize people and thoughts (in our current every day lives).
March 2, 2008
I went back and forth on how well I liked this book. I didn't dislike it but it is not one of my favorites. It is the story of Agnes LaGrange who emigrates to South Africa as a housekeeper. It begins in 1920 after the war. The theme is one of empowerment for women. It tells how Agnes who has nothing rises in position and strength despite many challenges. She becomes a woman of intelligence and passion yet remains independent and determined to make something out of herself.
November 28, 2009
I have attempted to write this summary many times...... The women in the story are confused about what they want. Agnes uses her beauty to get what she wants from men. She is proud of her independence, but wonders if she is happy being unmarried. Sarah marries a nice-looking man who cheats on her, but she lives in a huge house. "The Mother-in-law" marries for money and messes around on the side. The story is set in the 1920s, but I guess it could have been set in the present..
January 13, 2010
I picked this up at a yard sale because I was intrigued by the independant woman subject reference. She did indeed prove to be independant if not from the future... I never imagined women of that day being soo sexually liberated but I guess its possible. Women are complicated no matter where or when....I also enjoyed the setting of colonial South Africa...the sites and sounds. Its a very quick and easy read..I'd recommend it for vacation or a quite day at home.
April 24, 2014
This book definitely started off a little rocky. I'm not sure if it was the style in which the author wrote it or the flow, but I did have a hard time getting into it. Once I did though, it greatly exceeded my expectations. I feel like I did grow while reading this book, and it was a solid 4 star experience.
September 9, 2009
Weird but good. The main character sleeps with anyone who looks at her in a way she likes while managing to make money by investing in hotels. I thought it was interesting that none of the men had names and were referred to only by what they did, like "the tycoon" and "the hunter".
September 6, 2014
I liked this book.It is about a woman with flaws,who isn't scared to admit it, describes her life,the struggles and the relationship with her daughter and her lovers.All the characters in the book have a downside and no one seems to have found the happiness and the life they wanted.
December 10, 2009
An engaging story about a very strong, self-made woman.
June 22, 2010
remainder mark
August 18, 2011
completely forgetable book. in fact i'm donating mine to charity to get rid of it.
February 26, 2012
Picked up this book at a cafe swap shelf during my vacation. Read it this afternoon.
A fast, but delicious read! Will read more from this author in the future!
A fast, but delicious read! Will read more from this author in the future!
March 27, 2012
i really didnt like it i couldnt get into it and it took forever to read
August 8, 2014
Not a bad little read.
July 27, 2014
The only book on my bookshelf I'm happy to read over and over again
August 28, 2015
Consequatur aliquam sed. Enim qui quidem unde qui. Provident ipsa qui molestiae et nam non dolorem. Error aliquid dolore.
October 9, 2007
The language is very spare. Read this years ago. Remember liking it.
Read
July 31, 2011I loved the characters in this one. You could just feel the story through them.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews