How to Make Your Dreams Come True

by Mark Forster

Most people think of life as either something that happens to them or as something which they have to bend to their will. Life in short is seen as a series of problems requiring solutions. As a result people spend much of their lives either in escape activities or driving themselves to achieve, often both at the same time. But life becomes qualitatively different when we see it as a theatre in which we decide what is going to happen and then let it happen in the way that an artist will allow his or her creation to appear. This book is an example of the message that it teaches. Forster records methodically how he himself stopped struggling to work against his own feelings and to let his life happen. Exciting and inspiring, his own story with accompanying exercises for the reader prove the life-changing fact - that when we give priority to the workings of our unconscious minds we can trust them not to let us down.

Genres: Self Help, Nonfiction, Business

208 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2002

About the author

Mark Forster is full-time life coach. He frequently runs workshops and seminars specialising in time management.

Reviews

[Maria · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a pretty dense book. Though I think I took notes… I'm still not sure what purpose this talking to my future self serves when I'm pretty sure about where I need to be going and such.

But… I do use the what's better list every day.

The concept of this is pretty simple:

Your subconscious thinks in present, positive tense. Which means that any goal you want to write must be written like this: I am a person who can do 100 push-ups in a row. (Of course, I'm not yet, but the point is that that is how the goal is written.)

To make this even awesomer, you rewrite the goal and add your awesome feelings at being able to do this goal: I am a happy, healthy person who can do 100 push-ups in a row. I feel like I could also run to the moon and back, but that's a different goal, and— I'm so happy I'm monologuing!

And, to make sure it sticks in your head or something, you also write your present reality: I am a healthy person who can do only 5 push-ups in a row. :(

Once you've done that, you also start a "What's Better?" list. Updated at the end of each day or throughout the day, this is a list of what's better (what 'better' is open to interpretation) for each day. You can use it for specific projects by setting a challenge for yourself to write one good thing about nails every day, thus exponentially increasing your chances of thinking positively about your nails… and hopefully not biting them because of it (I think it works?).

There's also a little bit about 'treating problems as friends,' which means that instead of being annoyed, you try to figure out what this problem would tell you if it was a friend of yours, something like, "Sweetie, the fact that you are so sore you cannot do 6 push-ups means you are working yourself too hard. Try doing 4 push-ups at a time instead. Don't stretch yourself more than you can bounce back."

Then there's a whole lot of stuff about creation, which honestly was a bit weird even for me, who made it through most of the book. Basically, "M'dear, life is a work of art. If you have a messy desktop, it's because you created that messy desktop. And because it's art… it's PERFECT the way it is." I have problems with this because… I don't like messy desktops. But that's fine. I can choose to tweak my art.

And, at the end, there's a nifty step-by-step thing that gives you tips to how to start this on your own.

Now, how do I use this book?

- I write a 'what's better list' every day. If I skip it one day by accident, I fill in from memory. (The past few days, whenever I want to quit my Scrivener app, where I keep all this stuff, I keep remembering cool things that happened that day. It's annoying, but also good.)
- I use the goal-setting method.

What don't I do?
- I don't self-coach every day. Yes, I should according to the book… but at some point it goes from 'I need help with this' to 'this is what I'm doing today (cool!) yes, I'm going to work now (alright) bye (bye)', which isn't something I particularly like. Maybe I just need to reread the book. Again. Maybe then I'll figure out what it is I'm supposed to be doing.

In conclusion… this is a great book. Very useful. And it's unique in the way that it's written (as self-coaching exercises).

You may not like this book if you're not into:
- Talking to a future self of yours
- Writing lists about positive things that happened to you

Otherwise, give it a try! You'll most certainly take something away.

[Keith · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is an interesting book, although at the moment I won't be actively trying the methods. I read Mark Forster's website occasionlly and I've also read Do It Tomorrow and Other Secrets of Time Management. I like that his productivity methods are not simply to-do lists, goals, targets, etc., but also strive to combine the physchological aspects of productivity such as motivation, intuition and subconcious thinking. This book is also special in that it was written using the techniques recommended in the book. However, somehow the book could not persuade me to jump in and start the methods described. It's partly because I know that Mark himself has since moved on to other methods and ideas and has more or less abandoned the approach described here. I will be placing this on my bookshelf and if/when I feel like it pick it up and try out the exercises. That's more or less what the book would recommend anyway! Following your feelings, however guided by a strong vision of the future.

[Mousa Almohsen · Rating 5 out of 5]

كتاب أكثر من رائع في التعليم الذاتي، قهو يعطيك مفهوم التخاطب مع الذات، ووضع تصور مستقبلي يجذبك له وجعل أهدافك تتحقق دون الإنزعاج من عدم تحقيقها في أوقاتها المحددة، وأيضاً يعطي شرح جميل عن قانون الجذب والإنسياق والدفع، أنصحكم بقرائته، فهو يختلف عن الأسلوب العادي للكتب، لأنه يأتي بأسلوب حواري جميل، قراءة ممتعة أتمناها لكم :)

[Rima Elcheikh · Rating 2 out of 5]

اكتفيت باعطائه نجمتين نظرا" لأسلوبه الحواري الذي نفرني من القراءة فأنهيته على مضض ...
مما لفتني في الكتاب :

... ان الغالبية العظمى من الناس يرغبون في أن يستبدلوا بحياتهم حياة أخرى تدوم الى الأبد عندما لا يعرفون ماذا يفعلون بحياتهم التي يحيونها

[Justus · Rating 3 out of 5]

Its an interesting book, a very different approach to self help from what I've read before, and an interesting premise -- develop a vision for the future and let it pull you towards it. Not sure what I'll do with it, I guess I'll file it away for future consideration.

FYI the Mark Forster has offered the book for free download on his website.

[فنافن · Rating 1 out of 5]

أتساءل إن كنتُ سأكمل قراءته في يومٍ ما .. ؛
ربما لأن أسلوب إيصال المعلومة أو الفكرة ( عن طريق الحوار والأسئلة والأجوبة ) يسبب لي الإرباك وتشتيت الإنتباه ..؛
كان من الأفضل لو استخدم الأسلوب السردي في جميع الفصول .. وأن لا يقتصر فقط على كتابة الكلمات الـ1500 التي حددها لنفسه كل يوم !؛

[Ghada]

I own a copy in Arabic

[Kirsten · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is another 'life-bible'.