Give Them Wings: Preparing for the Time Your Teen Leaves Home

by Carol Kuykendall, Krista Gilbert

Updated and Revised
Your teen comes home with her driver’s license. College catalogs fill your mailbox. Senior pictures are taken, and graduation gowns are fitted. The family car is loaded to take your college freshman to his dorm.

During that transition time when a teen becomes a young adult, family roles must stretch and adjust to accommodate spreading wings. What can you expect in this process? Give Them Wings offers insight into how families change as parents and teens make room for the future. Emphasizing the need for independence and responsibility, Give Them Wings explores many ways that parents can equip their teen.

If your children are on the brink of adulthood, Give Them Wings can help you survive the changes and thrive on the challenges the next few years will bring. You can be prepared to help your teens journey into adulthood, as well as learn to enjoy the process of emptying the nest.

Genres: Parenting

324 pages, Paperback

Published August 7, 2018

Reviews

[Bethany Fader · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was exactly what I needed as I'm 4 months away from my first child graduating from high school. Also full of lots of practical ideas.

[Heather · Rating 5 out of 5]

A book I needed to read.

[Shelby · Rating 5 out of 5]

Oh my goodness this is exactly the book I needed to read right now. The authors said things exactly what I am thinking as my firstborn is going off to college! Lots of good recommendations and would highly recommend this for parents who have kids going off to college up to empty nesters. So many take home points and will need re read for each kid but there were points to think of for all of my kids especially where they are now as 10th grader and a 8th grader.

[Jessica VM · Rating 4 out of 5]

Super practical book to help prepare for your child to leave the home. Balancing my emotions as a parent and understanding the emotions of my child was huge for me. Will be recommending to friends.

[Nicole Knox · Rating 5 out of 5]

Highlighted a lot. Will go back to certain chapters when each child is going through that phase in life. I will enjoy the reminders.

[Jehan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Outstanding! So practical, helpful, and rooted in Scripture. I still have 3 years until we launch one to college but I will keep referring back to this book for years to come. A must read for any mom preparing herself and her family for a teen to leave home.

[Heather · Rating 5 out of 5]

I began my good reads account to keep track of both excellent and boring reads since my memory fails me so often. This is one of the *best* books I have ever read on a subject. It is my second book in search of preparing my heart for my first born leaving our home in a year to head to college. Unlike the first book I chose, (which would have been a complete waste of time had it not had a quote from this one, which is how I discovered it,) this read was everything I was looking for.

It had the emotional element...yeah, I want to get some of the tears out now as well as have the reminder of going deep in savoring the moments this year. Some chapters made me tear up, others made me treasure things coming up.

It was spiritually instructive. I loved her perspective as a strong believer and her Biblical references. This really ministered to me.

And it was practical. She brought some new ideas to mind, and there are quite a few things that I am doing or plan on doing as we approach college that came out of reading this book. She also has explained some things that I am seeing go on in the heart of our senior. It is just really encouraging to read about other's experiences and glean from their knowledge about what is coming up.

I tried to read through this very slowly and really think it through, one chapter at a time. I plan to re-read it one more time before graduation. Highly, highly recommend.

[Lindsay · Rating 4 out of 5]

I received this book after winning a copy from the publisher. It was a contest I entered because I wanted to read this book. I would have bought it had I not won a copy. After reading it, I will buy more copies to pass along to friends and family. *The author even included a sweet personal note*

Give Them Wings: preparing for the time your teen leaves home, by Carol Kuykendall and Krista Gilbert, is a must read for all parents, especially moms. Carol Kuykendall wrote this after her kids left home for college and has recently updated the title with Krista Gilbert to include the extra things youth today deal with. Carol takes the reader through the teen years and how to prepare your child for the adult world they will face. She gives great inside on making connections and memories before they go but also being intentional about the things they need to know, such as using the Post Office.

Although my daughter is only nine years old, she is already beginning to separate from me and Carol reassured me this is a normal thing and I really feel easier about this new transition coming up. When I talked to my husband about our daughter not wanting/needing me so much anymore, he laughed and was like, "yeah.....so...." but for me, it was unexpected and devastating. I could not imagine a world where I'm not the center of my daughter's life and its great knowing I'm not alone. I now feel like I can not take it personally and be a better mom, showing Gods love and grace in this season. Carol also walks the reader though the actual saying goodbye. I feel I can use her wisdom and apply it to my situation and make the most of a difficult time.

The only critique I have and the reason it does not get a full five stars is because I would have like a little more detail and stories about exact challenges and specific things the writer did. She did have one great part written from her son's point of view and I would have liked to hear more of that voice as well. Other than that, this a wonderful guide. Carol and Krista do not put any pressure on the reader but instead, I felt as though they were holding my hand and facing my fears with me.

I highly recommend to those who have children entering the teen years (so they have time to prepare) but also for those whose teens are leaving the house or need to leave the house.

[Bicky · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was an extremely helpful guide for me as I enter into my son’s senior year! Carol lovingly guides parents through the spiritual, emotional, and practical aspects of launching a teen into adulthood. I underlined sections in every chapter and took notes I know I want to go back through to internalize. She writes honestly and normalizes many of the experiences I have already begun to experience, and she helped me consider some things that were not at all on my radar, and she
shared some wonderful ideas that I plan to incorporate. Thank you, Carol… this was exactly the book I needed at this season. I plan to share it with all my mom friends who are experiencing a having a senior for the first time.

[Kim Moog · Rating 5 out of 5]

Carol offers some great pieces of advice for parents of teens and early 20's. She reminds us that our roles as parents and children have (out of necessity) evolved and that is a good thing.
Additionally, she offers 8 great reminders for Successful Parenting that everyone should keep a copy of in their back pocket! :)

[Jennifer · Rating 4 out of 5]

A friend gave me this book because of the trouble I was having adjusting to my only child going away to college. I wish I had read it years earlier! Lots of insight into the teenage years and especially the transition to college. Very religious in its perspective, but I was able to just ignore that part. A helpful read for anyone with teenagers.

[DeNae · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm so glad I came across this book because it was a perfectly timed read for me. I took so many notes and also just pondered many of the ideas in my heart as we prepare to send our oldest son to college in the fall. There was practical advice, the importance of clear communication and setting expectations, and also heart to heart advice on the grief involved in this big life transition.

[Rachel · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book reminds us of Moriah, and sacrificing our desires and expectations as we release our children. It also warned me that the expectation of the releasing can be more difficult than the actual day. It also had a lot of personal stories of the releasing process. Some comforted me that all moms have gone through this and survived. Children have made wrong decisions and survived.

[Jodi · Rating 4 out of 5]

Grief is part of the process

This is just what I needed in this season of letting go. The author offers hope for the empty nest years but that didn't stop me from sobbing my way through the last half of the book. At least I know I'm normal :)

[Julie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent book and just what I needed as I prepare to send my first son to college.

[Alyssa · Rating 4 out of 5]

Good perspective for me with Will leaving for school.

[Debbie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Valuable reminders from parents who have sent their teens into the world as adults. I appreciated their wisdom!