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236 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2017
["br"]>["br"]>The love we used to share is gone, and I don’t see any way we can get it back.
“I know about Tammy.” Her voice is so calm and collected, I question for a second if I imagined her words. “And I know you’ve been planning to ask me for a divorce for some time now so you can be free to run away with her. You think if you leave all your responsibilities behind, you can be the carefree teenager you were before we married.”
“Then you found someone else, and our relationship never had a chance. So you think Tammy makes you happy, and she makes you feel like a man again. You have a chance at a new life with her, to regain your vitality and feel alive again.”
A divorce is not what’s best right now. This is Kyle’s senior year of high school, and he deserves the best we can give him. Your running off with your little whore is nowhere in the same realm as what’s best for him.
“Let me guess,” she continued her rant. “She’s in her twenties. No kids. Flat stomach. Perky breasts. And no real-life experiences to jade her.” “Wow, Leigh, sounds like you’ve met Tammy George before.”
He’s been seeing her for about six months, though.
“Kyle and his girlfriend were here the other evening…when you weren’t…and I noticed him treating her with the same disregard you show me. They had a fight about it, and I talked to him after he took her home. You’re already rubbing off on him.”
I run my hand through my hair in frustration. Nine months without seeing, hearing, or touching Tammy? How am I supposed to do that when I’m in love with her? When I can’t wait to see her every day? When I rush to work just because I know she’s there?
“I expect you to go out of your way to avoid seeing her, taking her phone calls, reading her texts, or anything else to do with her. But quitting your job won’t be necessary. I had a long talk with your boss. There’s a no-fraternization rule in the office, you know. Both of you could be—and should be—fired for your actions. But Rob has agreed to let you work from home instead of going into the office. You can still visit your doctors, but if you go back into the office without his permission, you’ll both be fired.”
Thinking with your dick instead of your head will do that to you
My word doesn’t mean much now, I know. But I promise I will stick to your rules until the day after Kyle leaves for college. Then you and I will go our separate ways.
"When Blake is available to catch up with your masturbation schedule, he’ll let you know.”
But not seeing, hearing, or touching Tammy for that long will be pure hell.
Just when I started to feel alive again, the carpet gets yanked out from under my feet.
Though I’ve known about Tammy for a while, hearing her voice and the things she said to my husband were too much to take.
“Yeah, that’s what they’re predicting. Tammy said…” His voice fades away, aware of the blunder he just made.
Every day, I’d assure Tammy I would tell Grace that night.
I thought I’d tell her we were over and I was moving on with Tammy. I thought Tammy and I would move in together. I thought I’d finally be happy again. Instead, I’m going up to my office to clear it out, to take home the things I need to do my job. I’m leaving the woman I love behind for the next nine months.
“Come on, Dad. You’re working at home all of a sudden, and now you’re making all these plans to do family holiday stuff. You’ve never done that before. Who’s dying?”
“Yeah, why’d you take her to work? You never carpool.” I shrug, hiding my guilt.
“Blake, I think you need to go get checked for STDs. You may trust her, but you just never know what someone you trusted is capable of hiding from you.”
"She’s your soul mate, huh?” “Maybe she is. She certainly acts more like it than you do. She looks at me like I’m the sexiest man alive. She wants to be with me, to talk to me, to touch me. You haven’t even looked at me in I don’t know how long, much less wanted me. You’ve been in your own little world, focused only on Kyle. That’s fine—you should’ve been active in his life, but not his exclusively. Not to the point I’m shut out of your life.” “Well, I guess you were just the perfect husband for the last eighteen years, and I’ve always been your shitty wife.
You’ve blamed us for why you had to put your dream of going to medical school behind you.
But I can’t live in a loveless marriage anymore.
Tammy’s very young, and she’ll eventually want a baby. If she waits until she’s thirty, I’ll be retired when our child graduates high school and moves out.
I wished Grace would look at me the way Tammy does now.
“He has a young girlfriend he wants a forever life with, Leigh. He’s been making plans to leave me to be with her for a while now. That’s not the kind of thing I can just forget.
showering her with the attention he denied me. So, when he was on one of his business trips, quote unquote, I checked up on him. He was with her.
Kyle, I had to face how selfish I’ve become over the years. I’ve been so consumed with myself, I didn’t even notice how much they’d suffered because of my focus on work and career and money, when all they wanted was a little more of my time and attention.
He’s playing a part for Kyle, to teach him how to treat a woman. Does he do all of this for her?
he didn’t tell her it was over between them. He just reiterated that his reason for being here is Kyle—reestablishing and building his relationship with his son.
You’ve been seeing someone else for six months behind my back. You had plans to divorce me and be with your new soul mate. Three weeks of pretending to care about me is hardly enough to make me believe you’ve suddenly changed.
“I’m so sorry, Grace. For this—her showing up here. For everything. I’m such a fucking idiot.”
THE MISTRESS==>“I’m here because she is trying to take you away from me. I love you, Blake. Leave her. I miss you so much,” she begs loudly while slurring her words. “That old bitch doesn’t love you or appreciate you. I do. I’m the one you love and the one you want.”
“You! You did this. You and your demands on him. He doesn’t love you—he loves me. Why don’t you just let him go and save some of your dignity? You’re pathetic.”
When she gets close enough, she rears her fist back and prepares to punch me, but I stop her cold with a hard jab to her nose. I feel her flesh give way under my knuckles and hear the crunch of bone as it breaks. She flies backward, landing in the grass on her back. Blood streams out of her nose and smears across her cheek.
==>double standard<==“You belong to me, Grace,” he says between wet kisses against my skin. “All of you. I won’t share you. I’ll fight until my last breath for you.”
==>double standard<==“There hasn’t been anyone else for you. Has there?” I already know the answer, but I need to hear the words. She shakes her head from side to side, but her gaze never strays from mine. The truth is there in the depths of her beautiful emerald green eyes. “No, there hasn’t been.”
A doctor isn’t taking my wife away from me. Cancer is.
==>There will always be doubt and distrust<==How will I ever be able to compete with Tammy in Blake’s eyes? She’s younger, prettier, and healthier. I’ll never be that woman again. How can Blake ever be physically attracted to me again? I don’t look the same anymore, and all the makeup and plastic in the world won’t change that fact.
