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The Red Sea Bride
At a language school on the Pacific Ocean, 18-year-old Sylvia falls in love with a devastating young Saudi man named Malik. After obtaining two college degrees and marrying Malik, she accompanies him to his five-thousand-year-old city, Jeddah, situated by the Red Sea. She meets Malik's mother and grandmother, both of whom married when they were children of 11 or 12. In Jeddah, Sylvia loses all rights: to work with pay, to walk on the street or to have a telephone. Her college degrees are valueless in the eyes of the Saudi government. When she gives her husband money to buy a piece of land, the deed is in his name and she is barred inheritance. Duped into working at King Abdul Aziz University, she is refused a salary. Love struggles in this magical world of the seen and the unseen, where jinn and angels are as palpable as the sand of the desert. Sylvia merges into a coterie of Western women married to Saudis, all of whom rely on their hearts and wits to keep an even keel. The author tells not just her own story, but those of her friends as well as of Saudi women she came to love as fiercely as her own blood relatives. Here is a tale of the passionate human heart and the choices some women make to follow it.
- GenresNonfictionMuslims
288 pages, Paperback
First published December 10, 2017
16 people are currently reading
1089 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 36 reviews
March 10, 2018
This book has a bit of everything. A beautiful love story. A story about God and the unseen world. A love story that broke my heart at the end. What began as a fairy tale romance, with letters signed, “Your slave, Malik” ended when the author just could not, no matter how hard she tried, conform to what her husband and the Saudi culture wanted her to be.
In the end, it was impossible and she had to save herself. Her life in Jeddah- sometimes reads like a fairy tale and sometimes like a prison. In some parts I thought, “Oh, I'd love to live there!” and in others I thought, how I would never want to live there and how brave Sylvia was to go and try and adhere to all of the strict rules of the Saudi culture. The ending broke my heart. The end of the beautiful love story between Sylvia and Malik, and also Mama Johara. Sylvia looking at her and seeing the orphan/co-wife/female who was deprived of an education, but whom she'd grown to love and who loved her. This book also had funny parts that had me laughing out loud as I read and the author painted a visual in my head of Eucalyptus trees and the Red Sea and the painted ceiling in her salon – the night sky, blue with gold stars and a chandelier. I want to sit in that salon!
I also feel like I know the characters after reading this book. Little Yousef, who was ostracized and abused as a child because he had a Western mother, when all he wanted was to fit in and be identified as a Saudi. I wonder how they are doing – Ann and Sylvia's brother Steven and poor Rita, who was put on house arrest by her husband. Malik's daughter Jasmine and even spoiled little Miyaz. There were many layers to this book and to these characters, who are not characters but real people. Little Miyaz was in many ways a holy terror but, it is heartbreaking when you read why he was so difficult and why he was so spoiled.
I loved the story of Sylvia and Malik, but besides them, there was also the older Yousef and Johara, and that he said to her, “When I die, I want my head here,” indicating her shoulder, when she was upset that he had taken two other wives. I'm trying not to give too many spoilers but the ending to their love story was beautiful and heartbreaking as well. So many layers to this book and so many layers to the people in the book! I love that no one is good and no one is bad-- the author shows us that people are just people- trying their best, doing everything they know to do – whether right or wrong. One thing is certain though, the women in Saudi Arabia are strong women!
This is a book I will certainly read again and recommend to friends and family. It's a book that you're sort of sad when you get to the end. You hate it when you get to the end but you're glad you've read a book that made you feel that way.
In the end, it was impossible and she had to save herself. Her life in Jeddah- sometimes reads like a fairy tale and sometimes like a prison. In some parts I thought, “Oh, I'd love to live there!” and in others I thought, how I would never want to live there and how brave Sylvia was to go and try and adhere to all of the strict rules of the Saudi culture. The ending broke my heart. The end of the beautiful love story between Sylvia and Malik, and also Mama Johara. Sylvia looking at her and seeing the orphan/co-wife/female who was deprived of an education, but whom she'd grown to love and who loved her. This book also had funny parts that had me laughing out loud as I read and the author painted a visual in my head of Eucalyptus trees and the Red Sea and the painted ceiling in her salon – the night sky, blue with gold stars and a chandelier. I want to sit in that salon!
I also feel like I know the characters after reading this book. Little Yousef, who was ostracized and abused as a child because he had a Western mother, when all he wanted was to fit in and be identified as a Saudi. I wonder how they are doing – Ann and Sylvia's brother Steven and poor Rita, who was put on house arrest by her husband. Malik's daughter Jasmine and even spoiled little Miyaz. There were many layers to this book and to these characters, who are not characters but real people. Little Miyaz was in many ways a holy terror but, it is heartbreaking when you read why he was so difficult and why he was so spoiled.
I loved the story of Sylvia and Malik, but besides them, there was also the older Yousef and Johara, and that he said to her, “When I die, I want my head here,” indicating her shoulder, when she was upset that he had taken two other wives. I'm trying not to give too many spoilers but the ending to their love story was beautiful and heartbreaking as well. So many layers to this book and so many layers to the people in the book! I love that no one is good and no one is bad-- the author shows us that people are just people- trying their best, doing everything they know to do – whether right or wrong. One thing is certain though, the women in Saudi Arabia are strong women!
This is a book I will certainly read again and recommend to friends and family. It's a book that you're sort of sad when you get to the end. You hate it when you get to the end but you're glad you've read a book that made you feel that way.
January 6, 2020
Very interesting read! It gave me a new perspective on life in Saudi Arabia that I had not previously stopped to consider. I enjoyed the little details Fowler would add in order to enhance the imagery within the stories told. She does an excellent job in crafting each chapter into its own interesting narrative while still having them connect to the bigger picture. Definitely recommend!
May 12, 2017
What would it be like for a young woman from California to fall in love with a man from Saudi Arabia, convert to Islam, and then move to Saudi Arabia to marry, and raise her children?
I have never asked myself this question because it never crossed my mind, but it is the most fascinating tale told in The Red Sea Bride.
This is Sylvia Fowler's life, and she opens her heart to the reader, and bears her soul to tell us the story of how she, a young woman from California, met and married a Saudi Arabian man and raised her children as an expat in Saudi Arabia (much to the dismay of her own family in the USA). Facing discrimination both in the USA, and in the Middle East, Sylvia boldly accepts the challenges of keeping a marriage together and raising a family in a society that views her, and her first born son, as second class citizens.
The Red Sea Bride is a really engaging memoir, wonderfully wrought, expertly penned, and told with compassion and understanding. It introduces the reader to a culture that most of us know very little about and brings it to life in a way that only a truly good memoir can.
I recommend it highly.
I have never asked myself this question because it never crossed my mind, but it is the most fascinating tale told in The Red Sea Bride.
This is Sylvia Fowler's life, and she opens her heart to the reader, and bears her soul to tell us the story of how she, a young woman from California, met and married a Saudi Arabian man and raised her children as an expat in Saudi Arabia (much to the dismay of her own family in the USA). Facing discrimination both in the USA, and in the Middle East, Sylvia boldly accepts the challenges of keeping a marriage together and raising a family in a society that views her, and her first born son, as second class citizens.
The Red Sea Bride is a really engaging memoir, wonderfully wrought, expertly penned, and told with compassion and understanding. It introduces the reader to a culture that most of us know very little about and brings it to life in a way that only a truly good memoir can.
I recommend it highly.
March 31, 2021
What an amazing story, and a beautifully crafted work of art. I am incredibly blessed to have received a copy of this book through a Goodreads giveaway.
The cover is what immediately drew my attention, it’s drawn by the author herself, and is strikingly beautiful.
Secondly, this book was so well-written it felt like catching up with an old friend after being years apart. It was warm, inviting, and it made me want to stay up all night reading.
I can deeply appreciate this book because my cousin married a Muslim man. She didn’t end up moving to Saudi Arabia like the author of the book, but it’s still personal, and very relevant.
I really enjoyed this book and it gave me a deep insight on middle eastern countries, their cultures, and how different they are.
Part memoir, part romance, and all around a fantastic book. Highly recommended.
The cover is what immediately drew my attention, it’s drawn by the author herself, and is strikingly beautiful.
Secondly, this book was so well-written it felt like catching up with an old friend after being years apart. It was warm, inviting, and it made me want to stay up all night reading.
I can deeply appreciate this book because my cousin married a Muslim man. She didn’t end up moving to Saudi Arabia like the author of the book, but it’s still personal, and very relevant.
I really enjoyed this book and it gave me a deep insight on middle eastern countries, their cultures, and how different they are.
Part memoir, part romance, and all around a fantastic book. Highly recommended.
December 9, 2020
I would definitely recommend this book, it takes you on an up and down rollercoaster. You can feel the emotion of the author when you reads this book. It has a great love story, and showcases the struggles and discrimination that women face in Saudi Arabia. This great book takes you through every emotion. To find out more about Sylvia's love story and tough decisions she has to make you would need to take the time to read this book. I promise you will not regret it.
April 24, 2021
Huge thanks to Ms. Fowler for this experience. Stepping into anothers life so very different from my own and what it will ever be was very eye-opening. Super fast-paced, beautiful, sad at times, but ultimately uplifting and courageous. :D
January 20, 2020
I don't really know where to start, this book is a favorite of mine and has been on my mind ever since I first read it over two years ago. I've re-read it since then I love it each time I read it. This is a story of a woman from California who meets and falls in love with a man from Saudi Arabia. She moves to Saudi Arabia to be with him and more than anything, I found this to be such a beautiful love story. I love that she put her heart and soul and complete trust in her husband and I really wish that it would have turned out well in the end for them. Sometimes things don't, as we all know. But I love that she gave it her all --- It really shows how genuine a person she is and how much she loved her husband and her family. She was treated so unfairly and so were her children and that was heartbreaking but the book was not a downer at all -- the writer is so funny at times that even though some things were difficult to read, she wrote the book so honestly and with such wit that it was an enjoyable read. I also loved the supernatural aspect of the book and it was interesting to read about the Jinn, which I've heard of but don't know much about. The setting was mystical and magical as well. I found this book to be very open and honest. I know it had to be hard to write but I think it's a very important book and I'm glad it was recommended to me. Fantastic.
December 10, 2020
This book was a must read especially for those considering cross-cultural marriages, those looking for a true insiders look into the misogyny and daily life of women in Saudi Arabia, or simply anyone trying to get a better appreciation of the freedoms we have in America. The narration follows the author, Sylvia Fowler as she becomes integrated into her new life through a cross-cultural marriage to a Saudi man. Her knowledge and independent American spirit proves to be troubling to the necessary adjusting of the very poor conditions and lack of freedoms for Saudi women. Racism and sexism plague the beautifully written pages in a way that conveys the reality of life that readers will perfectly understand and have trouble digesting. Not only does Sylvia share her own stories, she interviews and presents multiple women's lives throughout the novel. One cannot come away from this book without a newfound sympathy and dare I say empathy, for the women and children (and even the men) under the harsh and toxic customs of the Middle East. Newfound respect for good parenting, kind husbands, and just being able to walk outside unaccompanied will change the life of every American reader.
May 20, 2022
Initially this book was just supposed to be a part of my college english curriculum but from the moment I began reading I was captivated by the story that Sylvia Fowler had to offer. The book entails of a young American girl who falls in love with a man of Saudi Arabian descent. Sylvia being an educated and highly remarkable person chooses to leave her life in America behind and follow her love back to his country where customs are different and her life style changes. As a reader who comes from a cultural background where women have to change in order to fulfill the mama desire , I found a strange comfort in knowing that Sylvia experience a lot of the same struggles that many women in my culture experience as well. The book also has the perspectives of the people around sylvia , which adds more personality and compassion to the story. I would definitely recommend this book to young women , men , and friends as it leaves a remarks imprint on how various cultures around us may love and live life.
May 16, 2022
I really enjoyed this book. The real life dealings and emotions by this author are felt through her writings. I like real things, real problems, watching someone’s life. And the way it was in Arabia made it more interesting to see how other cultures live and treat each other. I would read other books by this author.
February 6, 2021
A beautiful memoir of a Western woman who converted to Islam, married a Saudi man and moved with him to Saudi Arabia. Her trials and tribulations as a western convert make for an interesting read. Her writing about the differences between religion and culture was very eye opening.
March 22, 2021
I really loved this book. It is about a lady that married a Middle Easter man and then they moved to Jeddah, Saudi Arabia. She came from California so this book really gives insight on what it is like to live in Saudi Arabia. I learned so much from reading this book which is why I love to read.
March 2, 2020
This book was amazing!! I 100% recommend, the author did a wonderful job showcasing the emotions she felt during her journey. You truly feel what the woman in the book is feeling, and it takes you on an emotional roller coaster. I was not able to put the book down! Definetely a must read. :)
July 24, 2019
After reading the summary by accident i was intrigued. Then i read the whole book. It was really nice. The author has woven the story around characters very well. Most of all the story made me cry, laugh and wonder about my own life. I really enjoyed the book.
December 13, 2017
What an impressive read. I am impressed by Sylvia's determination and resilience. Sylvia has a way of merging my thoughts with hers. Her sarcastic remarks and smart responses make me agree and sympathize with her thoughts. That makes for an excellent read. It was a well- designed work of art. I thank Sylvia for taking the time to write and for being an exceptional person. It was an enjoyable read. We need good people to write good books. This world needs examples of resilience and people who are willing to stand up for human dignity.
May 22, 2020
I loved how openly the author expressed how it was becoming a Muslim with her husband. I really feel that I was able to connect to the feelings she felt with everything she went through. Not all books can make you feel like you're in the story with the character but this one did! She is also my teacher and she's a great person! Recommending this book 100% to all!
May 18, 2021
Have you ever heard horror stories about what it's like to be a woman in the Middle East? This is the story of an American woman who falls in love with a man from Saudi Arabia. She moves to Saudi Arabia with him and converts to Islam, and even though she and her children were treated unfairly, she tried so hard to have everything work out well.
May 22, 2020
The book was very interesting and gave me a different perspective on life of Saudi Arab people and lifestyle. It was also a great love story and it was interesting to see all the different women she met that were just like her!! I would definitely recommend this book to people!!
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May 10, 2020 I just finished The Red Sea Bride. I really enjoyed it and it has to be in my top 5 favorite books.
November 22, 2021
I wanted to read this book to take a closer look at a foreign culture and the author delivered that. As I began the book I had a sense of “this won’t end well” and it didn’t. The gulf between the liberal California the author grew up in and the established Saudi culture she tried to enter was insurmountable without a complete surrender of self. Some of the people she met came across well but many others did not - and that is because I looked at them from my own cultural perspective. I am glad I read the book - which, as an ARC, was riddled with typos that were hopefully caught for further editions - and I hope that Ms. Fowler is happier in the next stage of her life.
May 21, 2020
This book is very intriguing. I felt like I could relate to the writer, because of how women are sometimes treated in society, and especially, in many religions, women get the short end of the sticks.
This book reminded me about women empowerment, how, Us women need to stick together.
And it is very relatable, with the writer relationship with her husband. Sometimes we are "blinded" by love or by the fantasy of a man, that we do some 'crazy' things. This is a great book! The author's descriptive passages and intensity to relay her message across to her audience was amazing !
This book reminded me about women empowerment, how, Us women need to stick together.
And it is very relatable, with the writer relationship with her husband. Sometimes we are "blinded" by love or by the fantasy of a man, that we do some 'crazy' things. This is a great book! The author's descriptive passages and intensity to relay her message across to her audience was amazing !
December 11, 2020
A beautiful story about an American woman named Sylvia and how she falls deeply in love for a Suadi man named Malik. Blinded by true love, Sylvia embarks on a life changing journey that takes her half way across the world in the name of true love, in which she struggles with an ever widening culture gap that eventually leads her to question the love of herself and her young son Yousef. The Red Sea Bride is an amazing look into the stuggles between Western and Eastern love and gives insight to a culture unbeknownst to any outsiders. You grow to love Sylvia and admire her courage and love for man that was undeserving of her. Amazing book!
May 22, 2020
I most definitely recommend this book!! It was very hard for me to put the book down after every chapter. I loved how Sylvia broke down the chapters, for me when I read a book I want to wonder why the chapter is titled the way it is so in this book the titles of every chapter really let you know what the chapter is about and I LOVE IT. I have never been to any of the places mentioned in the book and I don't want to spoil anything because of how great the book is but she is very descriptive and I am able to visualize what is going on as I read. If it is one thing I look for in a book it's being able to get into the book within the first page and a half, and being able to visualize everything as I am reading and this is exactly those. This book is worth your time and I finished it within 3 days but lets be honest I could have finished it in one! The picture in the front made me nervous at first because I thought it was going to be boring, or I was not going to understand it but nope. It totally caught me by surprise. Every chapter had me saying "omg," "wow I can't believe...," "I am so sorry for..." I can go on and on about the book but overall READ THIS BOOK I promise it does not disappoint and it gave me such an insight on what the women in from another culture go through, the different lifestyles, how it is when you convert to another religion, and that's all I am going to say before I start to spoil.. So WOW.. just read it!
July 12, 2019
A fascinating story, Fowler' s memoir takes us deep into her marriage and life over seas. She reveals and hides the world of women in Saudi Arabia as she describes twenty years as an ex-pat. Her experiences as a working woman were infuriating to me, and yet nothing compared to her life at home, which is still difficult to grasp. A home with windows deep enough that the person standing in front of them can't be seen from the outside. A home in which she is simultaneously blamed for not speaking Arabic, and not taught how to speak it. There are flashes of her wit and fire, but make no mistake, this is not a scintillating tell all. Rather, it is the quiet telling of her life and it is remarkable.
January 18, 2020
The Red Sea Bride tells how Sylvia Fowler followed her heart to Saudi Arabia . . . where her Saudi husband expected her to become Saudi, heart and soul. I have heard of other women who have made a success of that transition, but Fowler's personal journey is so astonishing that one wonders where she found the courage! Well written and witty, I thoroughly enjoyed this book. It will probably become a historical marker in a few more decades. . . .
June 30, 2021
2.5 stars. I received this book in a Goodreads Giveaway. While I think the subject matter for this book is interesting, and I appreciate the author's investment of time and energy, I was disappointed. There are many events, descriptions, and dialog not contributing to the structure and movement of the story forward. Many transitions are awkward, leaving the reader with questions. It is more a biography than a memoir. Perhaps a thorough editing process would make this book shine.
August 22, 2022
Graciously received a free copy through good reads.
This author is in desperate need of an editor. That would make this from a good book to a really good book.
The author shares what being married to a Saudi man is like, and it's something I plan to never sign up for.
This author is in desperate need of an editor. That would make this from a good book to a really good book.
The author shares what being married to a Saudi man is like, and it's something I plan to never sign up for.
April 27, 2020
This book is so intense! An absolute favorite of mine! I will be writing a better review in a few days... Great, great book...
June 9, 2021
Good story
February 10, 2025
On goodreads, there are 167 books set in Saudi Arabia compared to the 1,042 books set in Japan. I’m prone to reading the latter so it was an eye-opener to see the difference. After scrolling through the Saudi Arabia setting books (many I can’t read since I haven’t studied Arabic), there were two that stood out. These were the top two on the “Fiction/memoirs set in Saudi Arabia” list. I read Under a Crescent Moon: Stories of Arabia first and The Red Sea Bride second. The two works put together as a whole work feel like a perfect fit: the fictional allegories and the real-lived experience, woven together in a way that makes me grateful for storytellers. There’s a moment when Sylvia Fowler mentions writing a story about a cherry tree which was a bit of an “ah-ha” moment for something I probably should have noticed earlier. So now I will be going back to read Under a Crescent Moon for a second time with a new appreciation and lens after reading this memoir.
I think the highest praise I can give the author is that I was genuinely interested in her voice and her way of telling stories. Originally, I came to this book looking to learn more about Saudi Arabia before taking a trip there and didn’t expect to be drawn in as much as I was. I felt like I was at a coffee-shop with a respected friend, holding onto every last word, wanting to know the stories within stories of the different women she came into contact with.
From 1983 to about 1999, Sylvia lived in Saudi Arabia married to Malik, a Saudi man she met at Middlebury Institute of International Studies in California. But the story starts well before she moves to Saudi Arabia. She took voice lessons, had a knack for writing, and enjoyed studying languages. She even attended an international school in Switzerland called Château Mont-Choisi to study French. I liked that she talked about her friendships, beginning with friendships at school growing up in California and the myriad of women she met from around the world in Saudi Arabia. To me, her relationship with Malik took backseat to her lived life and experiences: trying to work at a women’s school with tons of barriers in place that kept her from being paid, raising a child who is bi-cultural yet shunned for having an American mother, finding a love of nature and trees, going for walks when she needed them, swimming in the ocean even if it meant they had to find an empty stretch of beach, navigating communal life in a home where she was the outsider, searching for opportunities to write while in Saudi Arabia, having a deep respect for the matriarchs in the family, and trying to separate Islam from the cultural practices in Saudi Arabia.
Something that surprised me about life in Saudi Arabia was that at that time (before the 2000s) cats on the streets were seen more as rodents than as pets. In one scene, Sylvia hears her students pointing and looking grossed out. When she investigates, it turns out to be a litter of kittens. “They were scared of kittens and I was scared of their damn public hospitals. What a strange world!” (p.67). A quick google search shows that there’s cat cafes in Saudi Arabia now so maybe that’s changed since the 80’s. I hope the public hospitals have improved since Sylvia’s experience was extremely stressful. “Pregnant and penniless…” (p.65). Now that’s an alliteration.
I highlighted a total of 55 quotes in the kindle edition, but the following are two that were memorable for how well-worded they were.
“I never realized to what extent movement, nature, freedom, health and happiness were intertwined until I lived in Jeddah. I didn’t blame Malik for the attitudes embedded in his society, but I had no coping system.” (p.164).
“If one set of circumstances is too hard and we are able to find greater ease elsewhere, then we should do so.” (p.277).
I think the highest praise I can give the author is that I was genuinely interested in her voice and her way of telling stories. Originally, I came to this book looking to learn more about Saudi Arabia before taking a trip there and didn’t expect to be drawn in as much as I was. I felt like I was at a coffee-shop with a respected friend, holding onto every last word, wanting to know the stories within stories of the different women she came into contact with.
From 1983 to about 1999, Sylvia lived in Saudi Arabia married to Malik, a Saudi man she met at Middlebury Institute of International Studies in California. But the story starts well before she moves to Saudi Arabia. She took voice lessons, had a knack for writing, and enjoyed studying languages. She even attended an international school in Switzerland called Château Mont-Choisi to study French. I liked that she talked about her friendships, beginning with friendships at school growing up in California and the myriad of women she met from around the world in Saudi Arabia. To me, her relationship with Malik took backseat to her lived life and experiences: trying to work at a women’s school with tons of barriers in place that kept her from being paid, raising a child who is bi-cultural yet shunned for having an American mother, finding a love of nature and trees, going for walks when she needed them, swimming in the ocean even if it meant they had to find an empty stretch of beach, navigating communal life in a home where she was the outsider, searching for opportunities to write while in Saudi Arabia, having a deep respect for the matriarchs in the family, and trying to separate Islam from the cultural practices in Saudi Arabia.
Something that surprised me about life in Saudi Arabia was that at that time (before the 2000s) cats on the streets were seen more as rodents than as pets. In one scene, Sylvia hears her students pointing and looking grossed out. When she investigates, it turns out to be a litter of kittens. “They were scared of kittens and I was scared of their damn public hospitals. What a strange world!” (p.67). A quick google search shows that there’s cat cafes in Saudi Arabia now so maybe that’s changed since the 80’s. I hope the public hospitals have improved since Sylvia’s experience was extremely stressful. “Pregnant and penniless…” (p.65). Now that’s an alliteration.
I highlighted a total of 55 quotes in the kindle edition, but the following are two that were memorable for how well-worded they were.
“I never realized to what extent movement, nature, freedom, health and happiness were intertwined until I lived in Jeddah. I didn’t blame Malik for the attitudes embedded in his society, but I had no coping system.” (p.164).
“If one set of circumstances is too hard and we are able to find greater ease elsewhere, then we should do so.” (p.277).
Displaying 1 - 30 of 36 reviews