Mindful Relationship Habits: 25 Practices for Couples to Enhance Intimacy, Nurture Closeness, and Grow a Deeper Connection

by S.J. Scott, Barrie Davenport

Feel disconnected from your spouse or partner? Struggle to keep your relationship fresh? Worried that everything will end in heartbreak? It's easy to fall in love. The challenging part is keeping that spark alive while you and your partner deal with "the real world." Your relationship can often seem less urgent than the day-to-day emergencies that you deal with -- your job, finances, children, and that to-do list full of chores. They all demand your immediate attention. So how do you find the time to nurture your love and intimacy?? What often gets lost in the shuffle is the love you share with your partner. Maybe you've neglected some of the positive habits you adopted when you were dating to win over your love partner. Or perhaps all of your conversations seem to end in arguments? Or worse, you might occasionally wonder if your relationship is even worth salvaging. The Build Mindful Relationship Habits If you want to build a deeper connection with your spouse or partner, then one solution is to build "Mindful Relationship Habits." In a mindful relationship, you are intentional about all your choices and interactions with your partner. You become more proactive in responding to each other's needs and less reactive to the challenges that often arise. You evolve to a higher level of interaction with one another. Mindful Relationship Habits -- 25 Practices for Couples to Enhance Intimacy, Nurture Closeness, and Grow a Deeper Connection In Mindful Relationship Habits, Wall Street Journal bestselling authors S.J. Scott and Barrie Davenport show you how to have a more mindful relationship by applying 25 specific practices. These habits will help you be more present with one another, communicate better, avoid divisive arguments, and understand how to respond to one another's needs in a more loving, empathic, and conscious way. With the relationship advice outlined in this book, you will get insights and lessons learned from a variety of relationship and mindfulness experts -- all backed by scientific research. Each habit presented offers a clear explanation of why it's valuable to the health of your relationship and instructions on how to make the habit a natural part of your interactions with your partner. Would You Like To Know More? Download now to re-create the magic in the most valuable relationship in your life. Scroll to the top of the page and select the buy now button.

Genres: Relationships, Nonfiction, Self Help, Personal Development, Marriage, Psychology, Health

282 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 1, 2018

About the author

Wall Street Journal bestselling author SJ Scott wanted to be Luke Skywalker when he grew up.

Unfortunately his complete lack of physical grace and introverted mannerism's kept the earth from having their own Jedi Knight to battle the Sith menace.

Steve “SJ” Scott was born and raised in New Jersey. After finishing college with a degree in psychology he knew he needed to further his education or work on his latte making skills.

During a short stint in US Air Force, Scott was able to get his Master’s in business and then moved on to conquer the business world.

Scott then spent a couple of years working for a company not unlike the company depicted in Mike Judge’s film, “Office Space”. After doing his share of “TPS” reports, Scott swore he would never work for anyone but himself.

He spent the next few years making this happen. Making a decent living online and eventually pivoting to writing books, blogging and even podcasting.

Scott has written over 30 books, most of them in the "self-improvement" genre. An area that he is personally passionate about.

His books have been published in 12 different languages. So he is well on his way to world domination. However, in his heart of hearts he knows he will soon have to venture out into the universe and defeat the Sith menace.

Reviews

[Sara Talebzadeh · Rating 5 out of 5]

یک کتاب کاربردی برای بهتر کردن ارتباطتون با پارتنرتون🤌🏼
من خیلی از این کتاب خوشم اومد، چون مشکلاتی رو میگفت که ادم میتونست توی خودش و زندگیش بیینه، ولی نمیدونی که واقعا آسیب زاس! ولی به خاطر کودکی یا ادم‌هایی که باهاشون بزرگ شدیم، یک سری رفتارهایی رو داریم و خود به خود هم انجام میدیم، ولی نمیدونیم که این رفتار ممکنه غلط باشه.

هر فصل درباره‌ی یک عا‌دتی صحبت میکنه که باید توی رابطه مون داشته باشیم و میگه که چطوری این عادت رو ایجاد کنیم و راهکارهای خوبی هم میده.
من برای اینکه مطالب بهتر توی ذهنم بمونه، یک سری فصل هارو برای خودم خلاصه کردم و واقعا تاثیر داشت🤌🏼

درکل از اون کتاب‌هاست که باید به چیزایی که میگه عمل کنید و توی زندگیتون بیارید تا تاثیرش رو ببینید و فقط خوندن این کتاب نمیتونه روی بهبود رابطه‌تون تاثیر بذاره❤️

[Brianna · Rating 5 out of 5]

another well-written book chock-full of tips to help anyone improve their relationships. Not only do they lay out 25 GOOD habits, but they take time to explain why relationships turn sour and how to change your mindset so you can implement those 25 good habits. This is a great book for anyone who is five, ten or even 35 years into a relationship. Being mindful of your relationship can only lead to better things!

[Jacqui · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book has been extremely helpful for my marriage and even for other relationships. We've had a difficult year, with stressor upon stressor. We tended to get mucked up in our own feelings and emotions without really paying attention to the other person and the relationship. The practices outlined in this book have helped us not only connect with each other but with ourselves as well.

[Jill · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have been dabbling in meditation and mindfulness for over a decade now. It’s been life-changing for me as an individual. When my husband and I realized we hadn’t had a communication “tune-up” in 8-9 very busy years, we decided to take this “COVID quarantine” time to do it. I googled books about mindfulness in relationships and found this. We both loved it! (And my husband doesn’t read much or practice mindfulness regularly.) Not everything applied to us, obviously, but it does a great job of applying the principles of mindfulness to couples. I found it easy to read. Relationships and feelings are complicated and, at times, messy, but this book offers approaches that are practical and methodical without a lot of repetition. I highly recommend it if you find yourself wanting to do some marriage “spring cleaning.”

[conchytahyde · Rating 3 out of 5]

Estoy haciendo research para ser la mejor terapeuta de parejas de la historia. Este no está mal, si de por sí tienes poca autoestima y quieres que tu relación mejores. Supongo que son cosas bastante estándar, pero todo el mundo no las conoce o no las practica, así que está bien.

[S t a r · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great tips for breaking bad habits

Great tips for solving all sorts of relationship issues in your relationship. Whatever your problem area, your concerns will be answered.

[Mohamadreza Baseri · Rating 3 out of 5]

۳/۵ از ۵.
این کتاب توسط نشر مون با عنوان «عادت‌های یک رابطه آگاهانه» ترجمه و چاپ شده.
کتاب در ۲۵ فصل به شما یاد می‌ده چطور رفتار و فکر کنید تا یک رابطهٔ خوب و بالغانه با همسر یا پارتنرتون داشته باشید.
نکتهٔ دیگه اینکه تنها برای روابط عاطفی نیست، می‌شه از محتوای کتاب برای بهبود روابط اجتماعی و کاری هم استفاده کرد.

[Jakub · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.31

[Moody · Rating 5 out of 5]

Honest, concise and straightforward

I've never really took the time to read a self-help book or honestly been interested in one but this book felt real, concise, and resonated as something new. It helped me put a new lens on life and recognize my own value. I enjoyed it and recommend it as process that can be shared by partners or solo (self improvement).

[Nick · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a great list, with straightforward and clear explanations of what is meant and how to initiate each item. The author(s) recommends taking on one habit at a time, which would make sense. Some of these require a lot of work, both on yourself and in terms of the relationship. So doing one at a time makes sense. This is an inspiring book with lots of gems in it.

[Vanushe pushufar · Rating 5 out of 5]

The book will enrich you thoroughly about relationship tricks and provides you with 25 basic yet important habits that every couple must create if they deeply care about each other and consider their relationship as a top priority.

[Bailey Barber · Rating 2 out of 5]

Meh read

Nothing revolutionary, nothing special to really be helpful. These are things most couples do already, but more drawn out. wouldn't really recommend.

[Imogen Broom · Rating 4 out of 5]

Mindful Relationship Habits is a thoughtful and practical guide that explores how mindfulness can strengthen communication, connection and emotional intimacy in romantic relationships. S.J. Scott and Barrie Davenport offer 25 accessible habits that couples can integrate into daily life, each aimed at promoting presence, empathy and understanding. The structure of the book is clear and user-friendly, with each habit broken down into an explanation, real-life examples, and actionable steps. The suggestions range from small daily check-ins to deeper practices like active listening and non-reactivity during conflict. The authors maintain a tone that is warm, encouraging and free of judgment, making it approachable even for those who are new to mindfulness or struggling in their relationships. What stands out most is the book’s emphasis on mutual growth. Rather than pointing fingers or assigning blame, the focus is on how both partners can become more intentional and emotionally intelligent. This empowers readers to take ownership of their contributions to the relationship while fostering compassion for their partner. While the book is packed with helpful insights, it loses a star for being somewhat repetitive at times. Some habits feel like slight variations of others and readers looking for more in-depth psychological or therapeutic context might find it a bit surface-level. However, for couples seeking practical, easy-to-implement strategies, this book is a great starting point.
Content Warnings:
- Mentions of emotional neglect and unhealthy relationship dynamics (brief, non graphic)
- Discussions around conflict and communication breakdowns
- Assumes a generally functional relationship framework (not intended for abusive relationships)
- May reinforce some heteronormative or traditional couple dynamics in examples

[Kuba Rydkodym · Rating 5 out of 5]

W przeciwieństwie do innej książki tego autora, którą czytałem ("Ćwicz każdego dnia...") ta pozycja jest naprawdę dobra. Rady nie są oczywiste i przyziemne, ale naprawdę sensowne. Sporo odwołań do fantastycznych badań naukowych, chociażby psychologa Johna Gottmana. Wiele ćwiczeń i konkretnych rad, które pozwolą pracować nad ważnymi nawykami.
Autorzy opisują idealny związek nieco inaczej niż współczesna kultura. Mniej ma być w nim romantyczności, ochów i achów, a więcej intymnej bliskości, przyjaźni i zrozumienia. Nawyki, które proponują prowadzą do celu, jakim jest właśnie taki związek.
Przeczytałem ją raz i sporo się z niej nauczyłem. Ale obecnie, wraz z żoną czytamy ją wspólnie. Po jednym rozdziale (nawyku) na tydzień. Robimy notatki i ćwiczenia proponowane przez autorów, a raz w tygodniu spotykamy się na wspólnym omawianiu rozdziału, swoich spostrzeżeniach i planach na zmiany. Dzięki temu oboje czujemy, że nasz związek wchodzi na wyższy, lepszy poziom.
Serdecznie polecam książkę wszystkim parom.

[Amanda Corrigan · Rating 2 out of 5]

Meh. Nothing particularly groundbreaking, and to be honest, I think we’d have no time to live our actual lives if we followed every “habit” suggested in this book. Set aside time for this, pause for that, reflect on your reflection of your partner’s reflection… you get the idea.

To be fair, it’s probably more useful for couples who are actively struggling or trying to repair something — and that’s totally valid — but it just wasn’t what I expected from the title or cover. I went in thinking it would offer small, practical mindset tweaks to bring a bit more presence and connection into everyday stuff. Instead, it felt more like Relationship Rehab 101.

Not terrible, not offensive — just not for me. But hey, I finished it, so that’s something.

[Tina · Rating 4 out of 5]

I did really enjoy this book. I decided to read it because I am interested in investing time and effort into my marriage. I want to do anything I can to ensure that our marriage lasts. I would say though that this book is more useful if you are going through a rough time in your relationship. Which I am happy to say we are not. However, there was a point whilst reading this book when my husband did something to annoy me which I have pulled him up on before. I could feel myself getting angry but I remembered some advice given in this book which stopped me and made me think a little more carefully on how to speak to him about it. I am really glad that I have read this book.

[Ram S · Rating 5 out of 5]

A summary of good habits in relationships

This book covers a lot of ground. I read it quite quickly in under an hour but it may take months to fully put it in practice. The book is easy reading and provides concrete examples. For me the chapter on digital devices, using "but", apologizing, shared activities, relationship meetings, empathy and anger were useful. I plan to talk to my wife about it soon. I also am amazed that there may be apps on phone to help you as a relationship coach.

[Okay_but_first_book . · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5
Myślę, że ta książka przysłuży się niejednemu z nas. Opisuje wiele sfer, w których może zaistnieć problem i wychodzi z wieloma propozycjami jego rozwiązania. Tłumaczy jakie nawyki są korzystne i potrzebne w związku i wyjaśnia nam jak zakorzenić je w naszym codziennym życiu. Miałam wrażenie że niektóre z nich powtarzały się, nie zmieniło to jednak pozytywnego wydźwięku tej książki. Pozaznaczałam wiele rad, które mogą przydać się na przyszłość. Jeśli ktoś czuje potrzebę jakiejś zmiany w związku, a nie wie jak się do niej zabrać to ta książka będzie dobrym rozwiązaniem.

[Beth · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a wonderful book. If followed, even loosely should produce wonderful relationships. Truly, working on 25 Habits could keep you busy forever. I even read this On the treadmill, so it was fairly interesting to me, though I find the dynamics of relationship fascinating. This book is one that needs to be gone back to again and again to refer to. Only 4 stars because although super informative, it could have done more very applicable stories or interesting examples included.

[Tony Corsino · Rating 4 out of 5]

Solid read

This book is a great guide to identify many different aspects of a relationship and do some self reflection on where things can be lacking and how you can work on them. Also a good read for a couple in any part of a relationship. Whether your relationship just began or you are year's in this book can be very helpful for two people open to change and communication.

[Casey Boatman · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a fantastic read. My wife and I have a very healthy marriage/partnership, but that doesn’t mean we can’t improve. Highly recommend this book for anyone in a relationship, even if it’s happy and healthy. Would also recommend it to people not yet in a long term committed relationship, as it can help with preparation. Definitely interested in checking out other works by these two authors.

[Ashley · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you want to be a good partner one day regardless if you have a partner now or not you should read this book. A summary of good and affectionate habits to always make your partner feel appreciated and valued. I can imagine reading this again in the future.

[Vishnu · Rating 5 out of 5]

Can be very helpful

I there everyone should read this book irrespective of the status of their relationship since we ll get to a lot about parameters that can cause positive impact in our relationship, if we apply them.

[Jonathan · Rating 3 out of 5]

it's fairly useful, some good techniques and suggestions in here. and the tone of the authors is not pedantic or judgy or saccharine, just straightforwardly helpful. now I just need to be in a relationship again 😁

[Mary · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is a quick read though those with knowledge of mindfulness to navigate relationship difficulties may find this book to simply be a compilation of other relationship experts work boiled down to talking points. It certainly saves couples from having to read 10 different books.

[Athena · Rating 5 out of 5]

Good book

The authors have very good points and good practices to implement into your relationship. I only put into practice two at the moment, but they have massively improved the communication and connection with my partner.

[Mariah · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great read!

I would highly recommend reading this book. It provided great insight about relationships, but also about self growth. I will certainly be implementing some of these habits in my everyday life!

[Hannah Imel · Rating 2 out of 5]

A reminder to practice mindfulness

Although this book was repetitive at times, it had a lot of great points and reminders to help you be more self-aware, emotionally available, and mindful not just with your partner, but also with yourself and all other relationships.

[Jens · Rating 2 out of 5]

This was disappointing. It's really common sense and very few special perspectives. The one take-away I'll remember is to have relationship vision, values and goals. Moreover, to have relationship meetings about those vision and goals.

[anita · Rating 4 out of 5]

4,5*
Naprawdę przyjemna książka, w której znalazł się stos ćwiczeń, porad i wskazówek, a wszystko to dopełnione badaniami naukowymi. Bez zbędnego paplania, przedstawione konkrety i to mi się podobało.