Oh man - this book was a button-pusher for me. Can't wait until book club to unload!
The author and her husband live beyond their means, and soon end up in debt. Despite the electricity being turned off occasionally and some one showing up to repossess her car, the author does not collar her husband and ask the questions that need to be asked. Maybe that's because if she knew their financial position, she would need to discontinue chairing the silent auction, attending Longaberger basket parties, and vacationing in Paris, Barcelona, San Francisco and the Florida Keys with their three children. Or maybe that's because if she knew, she would have to remove her three children from private school and send them to (mimes pearls-clutching) public school!! Or maybe that's because if she knew, she would have to get another job to supplement the annual $10,000 salary she was pulling in as an adjunct professor. But of course, then there would be no book. From here on - spoiler-alert!!!
Once the ugly truth is making so much noise that she cannot ignore it any longer, the author gets down to business of attempting to make a change. But not really. The author gets a job that, given the fact of the amount of the tax lien she quoted, and the amount of the salary she would earn at the new position, could have probably paid off the lien in two years. But noooooooo.....she takes up a flirtation, and causes her husband to demand that she return after just one semester of full-time work. After that, she just dawdles along on the adjunct salary, supplementing with workshops, until she decides she really needs to earn some money. Yay, you may say! Finally our girl is going to pull on her boots and get to work!! Well, I suppose that's true if you think that taking out another loan so she can enroll to get her Master of Fine Arts in English on the internet will generate the hundreds of thousands that her family will need. Sigh (and head-banging against wall).
During this entire time, no one mentions the words "bankruptcy filing." Instead, we are treated to the story of how they used a sledgehammer to break into their former house when the lender changed the locks. You see, in an effort to deny the fact that this is no longer their home, they had been moving out "gradually" and had failed to clean out all of their belongings, even after six months from their relocation. Sigh.
Meanwhile the author and her husband spend their time ordering chicks for $500, and buying various goats for $650. This apparently makes them feel like farmers, getting in touch with their Appalachian ancestors, and generates quite a few colorful ancedotes about dying chickens, goat copulation, and goat bladder surgery (eeek).
The capper for me was the author's incorporation of her ancestors who also lived in the North Caroline mountain area. While this was, generally, a nice idea, and I can see how the author thought that she could make the book about her attachment to the land of her forefather (and foremothers), but she couldn't resist carrying on about it. I nearly lost my mind as she explained how at times she whispers the name of her great -great grandmother (the one who, as the author explains, was part Native American and the daughter of slaves) as a mantra as she goes about her daily chores. "Calllllllie, Calllllllie, Callllllie." Oh, God, no wonder the goats are screaming. I am sure Callie is watching from the great beyond, muttering, 'Let the damn goat die and cook him up for dinner, if you are out of money, you twit."
Finally, the last straw was the recitation of the alcoholic beverages the author enjoys. I cannot recall one instance where she just drinks iced tea, or lemonade. It is always a glass of Merlot, a Nicaruguan rum, a hot toddy, or, always and forever, a craft beer. At some point, I decided that the way the McGahas were going to work their way out of debt was earn money from brewers by name-dropping one craft beer or another in this book.
PS By the way, the title makes no sense. Yes, they are flat broke, but they start out by buying 3 goats and never have less that that... so , where's the two goats part coming from? Why not "Flat Broke with Some Goats?" If they can't tell the difference between 2 and 3, it may explain their money problems in the first place.