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Outside Myself
Extraordinary insight into living without sight. "Outside Myself" will enlighten both young and old. Tallie is a young girl struggling to adjust to her blindness. Benjamin is an older gentleman working in a library for the blind. A chance phone call between hem leads to a transformative year, and a window of understanding is flung open as empathy, independence, and resolution rush in.
- GenresDisabilityYoung Adult
237 pages, Kindle Edition
Published January 4, 2018
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Displaying 1 - 13 of 13 reviews
May 30, 2018
Notes: the author is a friend of mine. I listened to the audiobook read (excellently) by Stephanie Keefer and Royal Jaye.
4.5 stars. This book is very well written, with some really beautiful passages and great lessons in it. It’s very refreshing to read fiction about disabled people written by someone who actually has that disability (Witucki, like her main character, was born blind) as disabled characters are all too often made up of inaccurate stereotypes and feel-good tropes put together by the able-bodied. Tallie and Benjamin are both believable, fully-realized, and sympathetic characters, neither saintly nor overly wise. As someone who grew up with visual impairment (though not as severe as Tallie’s) and other disabilities, I definitely related to her struggles with identity, rejection, and acceptance of herself as depicted in the novel, which I thought were excellently captured. I had a harder time relating to Benjamin’s character, but I did appreciate the new perspective I gained from seeing the world through a character so different from myself. Also, the two narrators have voices and styles that, while clearly written by the same person, were refreshingly distinct and colorful, and I enjoyed how they highlighted different aspects of their stories.
My favorite part of the book was how vivid and interesting the descriptions were. Things were so well described that I didn’t notice the lack of visual description unless one of the two narrators pointed it out, which they sometimes did, to very interesting effect. I thought for sure that, as someone with a visual impairment myself, I was already pretty good at non-visual description. But even I was often surprised at how much depth scenes had and how clearly I could imagine them with very few visual elements. I particularly appreciated the vivid descriptions of music.
There were only two aspects of the book I was not entirely sold on. Firstly, the extent to which Tallie’s father was committed to the idea that she would one day be able to see seemed a bit unrealistic to me. Maybe I’m just lucky to have had and known better-adjusted, more accepting parents (both my own and of other people with disabilities I have known), but I had a bit of a hard time believing someone could be that in denial, though I do think Witucki used this dynamic in their relationship to develop the plot and Tallie as a character in really interesting ways. Secondly, because I know the author personally and know at least some of the details from her real life that inspired parts of the book, I was sometimes a bit distracted by trying to figure out how closely the book would match her life. But on the whole it didn’t take too much from my enjoyment of the story, and was just a slightly odd new experience (most of the other fiction I’ve read by people I know has been fantasy or science fiction, so parallels to the author’s real lives were harder to draw).
Overall, this is a great first full-length novel. I highly recommend it to other visually impaired or blind people (who I think will be happy to see authentic portrayals of themselves in fiction) and to sighted people (who I think can learn a lot from Witucki’s characters about blindness, in addition to just getting to enjoy a very well-crafted story).
4.5 stars. This book is very well written, with some really beautiful passages and great lessons in it. It’s very refreshing to read fiction about disabled people written by someone who actually has that disability (Witucki, like her main character, was born blind) as disabled characters are all too often made up of inaccurate stereotypes and feel-good tropes put together by the able-bodied. Tallie and Benjamin are both believable, fully-realized, and sympathetic characters, neither saintly nor overly wise. As someone who grew up with visual impairment (though not as severe as Tallie’s) and other disabilities, I definitely related to her struggles with identity, rejection, and acceptance of herself as depicted in the novel, which I thought were excellently captured. I had a harder time relating to Benjamin’s character, but I did appreciate the new perspective I gained from seeing the world through a character so different from myself. Also, the two narrators have voices and styles that, while clearly written by the same person, were refreshingly distinct and colorful, and I enjoyed how they highlighted different aspects of their stories.
My favorite part of the book was how vivid and interesting the descriptions were. Things were so well described that I didn’t notice the lack of visual description unless one of the two narrators pointed it out, which they sometimes did, to very interesting effect. I thought for sure that, as someone with a visual impairment myself, I was already pretty good at non-visual description. But even I was often surprised at how much depth scenes had and how clearly I could imagine them with very few visual elements. I particularly appreciated the vivid descriptions of music.
There were only two aspects of the book I was not entirely sold on. Firstly, the extent to which Tallie’s father was committed to the idea that she would one day be able to see seemed a bit unrealistic to me. Maybe I’m just lucky to have had and known better-adjusted, more accepting parents (both my own and of other people with disabilities I have known), but I had a bit of a hard time believing someone could be that in denial, though I do think Witucki used this dynamic in their relationship to develop the plot and Tallie as a character in really interesting ways. Secondly, because I know the author personally and know at least some of the details from her real life that inspired parts of the book, I was sometimes a bit distracted by trying to figure out how closely the book would match her life. But on the whole it didn’t take too much from my enjoyment of the story, and was just a slightly odd new experience (most of the other fiction I’ve read by people I know has been fantasy or science fiction, so parallels to the author’s real lives were harder to draw).
Overall, this is a great first full-length novel. I highly recommend it to other visually impaired or blind people (who I think will be happy to see authentic portrayals of themselves in fiction) and to sighted people (who I think can learn a lot from Witucki’s characters about blindness, in addition to just getting to enjoy a very well-crafted story).
February 26, 2026
I deliberately tried to find a book with a blind protagonist written by a blind author, and was surprised that there were so few. But this book makes up for that lack of quantity. It is fiction at its finest: it shares something about the human experience in a way you didn't appreciate before. The story is poignant and profound, and sometimes so heartbreaking that it's hard to read. The characters are real, flawed and multilayered. The prose can be slightly clunky at times, but the rest is strong enough to easily outweigh that. Overall, this was both highly informative and deeply touching.
August 31, 2018
This wasn’t bad, but I was expecting the heroine to be a little older.
July 27, 2023
I really enjoyed this story. Thank you Kristen for sharing it.
March 8, 2018
Blind from birth, Tallie desperately wants to be cured. To be, in a word, normal. To thereby have fewer problems in life.
But does this desire stem from the pain of missing out? Or does its origin lie in the pressures lovingly imposed by her father?
Perhaps both are true. But in any case, all Tallie knows is that something's got to change.
An avid reader, Tallie decides to research her own eye condition but knows she won't find much scientific literature in the children's section of the state library. So she calls Adult Reader Services--an action that will change her short life.
Enter Benjamin, the voice on the other end of the line. He is older, wiser, and knows full well about living in denial of a disability. Growing up, he had barely enough vision to get by, sticking out like an invisible sore thumb as he tried to pass for sighted. Throughout the story, Benjamin gently guides Tallie down a path to living blind that, while not pretty, seems less intimidating and more manageable.
But often, teachers also learn from their students, and in this way, Tallie and Benjamin have one of the most special love stories there is--not a romantic love, but the Anne Sullivan/Helen Keller kind of love. Even though Benjamin knows he shouldn't break any farther through the barrier of professionalism, his concern for Tallie haunts him, and naturally, he comes to care for her like family.
Like his estranged family.
And so it is that, in much the way Benjamin mentors Tallie in seeing blindness differently, Tallie inspires Benjamin in turn to give family a second look.
The themes behind the title come into play here. Whether you're sighted or blind, grief can make you truly myopic. As their relationship progresses through artistic POV shifts and thoughtful splices of dialogue, Tallie and Benjamin teach each other by example to look beyond oneself, to see beyond one's own circumstances and branch out toward the collective.
This is a highly educational read. Witucki gives us two perspectives on blindness--being born without sight versus losing it later in life--and even manages to shatter a few myths along the way. But perhaps most remarkable about the piece is its universal tone. We get a sense of variety in the lives of our blind protagonists, a sense of normalcy--something that I think is very important in diversity literature. So often, it's about the struggle--the struggle of coming out, the struggle of going blind, the struggle of racial inequality--and while these are important topics that should always have the spotlight, we will never cease to put our diverse fellows on pedestals if we don't begin to employ normalized representation of them in literature as well. This is a difficult balance to strike indeed, but I feel Witucki, who is blind herself, has achieved it beautifully.
But does this desire stem from the pain of missing out? Or does its origin lie in the pressures lovingly imposed by her father?
Perhaps both are true. But in any case, all Tallie knows is that something's got to change.
An avid reader, Tallie decides to research her own eye condition but knows she won't find much scientific literature in the children's section of the state library. So she calls Adult Reader Services--an action that will change her short life.
Enter Benjamin, the voice on the other end of the line. He is older, wiser, and knows full well about living in denial of a disability. Growing up, he had barely enough vision to get by, sticking out like an invisible sore thumb as he tried to pass for sighted. Throughout the story, Benjamin gently guides Tallie down a path to living blind that, while not pretty, seems less intimidating and more manageable.
But often, teachers also learn from their students, and in this way, Tallie and Benjamin have one of the most special love stories there is--not a romantic love, but the Anne Sullivan/Helen Keller kind of love. Even though Benjamin knows he shouldn't break any farther through the barrier of professionalism, his concern for Tallie haunts him, and naturally, he comes to care for her like family.
Like his estranged family.
And so it is that, in much the way Benjamin mentors Tallie in seeing blindness differently, Tallie inspires Benjamin in turn to give family a second look.
The themes behind the title come into play here. Whether you're sighted or blind, grief can make you truly myopic. As their relationship progresses through artistic POV shifts and thoughtful splices of dialogue, Tallie and Benjamin teach each other by example to look beyond oneself, to see beyond one's own circumstances and branch out toward the collective.
This is a highly educational read. Witucki gives us two perspectives on blindness--being born without sight versus losing it later in life--and even manages to shatter a few myths along the way. But perhaps most remarkable about the piece is its universal tone. We get a sense of variety in the lives of our blind protagonists, a sense of normalcy--something that I think is very important in diversity literature. So often, it's about the struggle--the struggle of coming out, the struggle of going blind, the struggle of racial inequality--and while these are important topics that should always have the spotlight, we will never cease to put our diverse fellows on pedestals if we don't begin to employ normalized representation of them in literature as well. This is a difficult balance to strike indeed, but I feel Witucki, who is blind herself, has achieved it beautifully.
March 14, 2018
Let’s make no bones about it: this is YA at its boldest and most beautiful. Same league as, say, Turtles All the Way Down by John Green or Wonder by R. J. Palacio, to name two recent titles. I thoroughly enjoyed Outside Myself by Kristen Witucki, and I was moved.
Now I must disclose that I am not a YA myself, I’m almost a pensioner… But everybody went to school once and keeps thinking back to those days and you can still enjoy YA lit without any reservations if you’ve stayed young at heart, right?
Anyway: Kristen, you’re a great writer. Period. Keep going. Maybe it’s not easy when you have a family and a job, but just write anything: romance, comedy… or murder mystery! A memoir about your life, present or past, perhaps? We need to hear more from the Planet of the Blind. Thank you so much for this book.
Now I must disclose that I am not a YA myself, I’m almost a pensioner… But everybody went to school once and keeps thinking back to those days and you can still enjoy YA lit without any reservations if you’ve stayed young at heart, right?
Anyway: Kristen, you’re a great writer. Period. Keep going. Maybe it’s not easy when you have a family and a job, but just write anything: romance, comedy… or murder mystery! A memoir about your life, present or past, perhaps? We need to hear more from the Planet of the Blind. Thank you so much for this book.
February 5, 2018
OUTSIDE MYSELF is a lovely, unusual #ownvoices novel about a young white blind girl whose parents are divorced, and her friendship with a much older Muslim African American man who works in a library for the blind. Rich in sensory detail, this story offers rare and authentic insight into navigating the world without sight, but it's really about loneliness and making connections and being human. This book is being marketed as YA, but it's really for adults, too, and offers plenty of fodder for classroom and book group discussion.
November 28, 2020
Outside Myself is a nuanced story of disability that celebrates the vibrancy of life that exists not in spite of, but because of disability. As Tallie goes from understanding braille and audiobooks as not "real" writing to using these forms to showcase her own thoughts, we get to accompany her and cheer her on. But just as important as Tallie's story is Benjamin's--where we witness a brilliant depiction of an experience of blindness through several decades of the 20th century, while also understanding how race intersects with this disability.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
January 29, 2021
Tallie is in middle school. She is blind since birth but thanks to her dad is determined to get a cure for LCA. Until one phone call from Benjamin changes her life for the better.
I loved this book! Just as I thought it could not get better, it did! More than about accepting your disability and learning from it, it is a story about growth and friendship. Tallie is not perfect. Benjamin isn’t perfect either. But both learn from each other. Both connect deeply and start to have a bond. It isn’t fatherly love or romantic love. It’s just friendship.. Just a willing ear to listen and answer.
It is told through alternate character. I had not read a book like that so am glad I could relate to it. The complexities of family is intricately woven in this book just like the complexities of being a disabled person in a non-disabled, sometimes adamant world. I love Kristen’s writing!
The portrayal of blindness is amazing! This is my first ever fiction with a blind character and I’m glad I was not let down, not that I was expecting either haha.
I could relate to it. And it was not just the blindness aspect which drew me in. it’s just the friendships Tallie formed and the overall theme of the book which actually captivated me. May be because I’m still finding my way through the world.. About to transition into what seems too daunting at this moment.
“Library day was the worst day for a blind person who loved to read. I couldn't ever browse bookshelves, take volumes down and flip through the pages. On Library Day, when other kids walked down the aisles in groups, chattering about books in buzzing whispers, I wandered away to the unpopulated corners or tagged far enough behind a couple kids so they wouldn't notice me.”
This!
It’s just that I did not tag along with the other kids and was left sitting at a corner not even knowing what the library looked like. So I was actually glad when I was allowed to take my own laptop and that’s when I loved my library period!
Highly recommend to everyone!
Fell in love with Kristen’s writing! Will be reading her other book also! I had read a few articles by her online and loved them. So I’m glad I loved it too!
“On the planet of the blind, no one needs to be cured. Blindness is another form of music, like the solo clarinet in the mind of Bartok. On the planet of the blind, the citizens live in the susurrus of cricket wings twinkling in inner space. You can hear the stars on the windless nights of June.”
STEPHEN KUUSISTO
I loved this book! Just as I thought it could not get better, it did! More than about accepting your disability and learning from it, it is a story about growth and friendship. Tallie is not perfect. Benjamin isn’t perfect either. But both learn from each other. Both connect deeply and start to have a bond. It isn’t fatherly love or romantic love. It’s just friendship.. Just a willing ear to listen and answer.
It is told through alternate character. I had not read a book like that so am glad I could relate to it. The complexities of family is intricately woven in this book just like the complexities of being a disabled person in a non-disabled, sometimes adamant world. I love Kristen’s writing!
The portrayal of blindness is amazing! This is my first ever fiction with a blind character and I’m glad I was not let down, not that I was expecting either haha.
I could relate to it. And it was not just the blindness aspect which drew me in. it’s just the friendships Tallie formed and the overall theme of the book which actually captivated me. May be because I’m still finding my way through the world.. About to transition into what seems too daunting at this moment.
“Library day was the worst day for a blind person who loved to read. I couldn't ever browse bookshelves, take volumes down and flip through the pages. On Library Day, when other kids walked down the aisles in groups, chattering about books in buzzing whispers, I wandered away to the unpopulated corners or tagged far enough behind a couple kids so they wouldn't notice me.”
This!
It’s just that I did not tag along with the other kids and was left sitting at a corner not even knowing what the library looked like. So I was actually glad when I was allowed to take my own laptop and that’s when I loved my library period!
Highly recommend to everyone!
Fell in love with Kristen’s writing! Will be reading her other book also! I had read a few articles by her online and loved them. So I’m glad I loved it too!
“On the planet of the blind, no one needs to be cured. Blindness is another form of music, like the solo clarinet in the mind of Bartok. On the planet of the blind, the citizens live in the susurrus of cricket wings twinkling in inner space. You can hear the stars on the windless nights of June.”
STEPHEN KUUSISTO
June 22, 2018
I was excited to discover a book told from the point of view of blind protagonists, and especially one written by a blind author. I appreciated the insight the book gave me into what it's like to be blind. I also appreciated the history and life experiences shared by Benjamin, the older character. I sometimes struggle with books that alternate being told by two characters, and this was no exception: I felt more invested in Tallie's story, and less excited when I would reach a Benjamin chapter. But Benjamin's story was informative. It often read like nonfiction, and at the end of the book, I learned that the character was based on someone real from the author's life.
The first few chapters completely hooked me. I was eager to hear about more about Tallie's experiences with the kids at school and with her parents and their different views on how to raise her. The book began to lose me when the timeline started skipping ahead. Several months would pass at once, so that I would leave Tallie in one situation at school, and return to her the next school year, with a different situation of friends and teachers. I wanted to know what had happened in the interim so that I could better follow her growth. I also wanted to better understand the development of her relationship with Benjamin; I would read of them speaking on the phone, but then each would have thoughts about the other that didn't seem to fit what I'd read, as if they were having additional conversations that were not in the book. So I felt a little disappointed in the story by the end, although I'm glad I read it and hope to read more from this author.
The first few chapters completely hooked me. I was eager to hear about more about Tallie's experiences with the kids at school and with her parents and their different views on how to raise her. The book began to lose me when the timeline started skipping ahead. Several months would pass at once, so that I would leave Tallie in one situation at school, and return to her the next school year, with a different situation of friends and teachers. I wanted to know what had happened in the interim so that I could better follow her growth. I also wanted to better understand the development of her relationship with Benjamin; I would read of them speaking on the phone, but then each would have thoughts about the other that didn't seem to fit what I'd read, as if they were having additional conversations that were not in the book. So I felt a little disappointed in the story by the end, although I'm glad I read it and hope to read more from this author.
September 8, 2019
When you hear that someone is “trying to adjust to blindness,” you may be tempted to think that they need to come to terms with the “fact” that they simply cannot do a laundry list of essential human activities. Can you set that aside for a time and consider this? Perhaps what they need to learn is that the sighted people around them don’t have the answers and in many cases may be holding them back.
This superbly written, beautiful and honest story of a mentor relationship reaches into several worlds to expose the deepest pain and the greatest triumphs of the human spirit. It is told by two narrators. Their names, Tallie and Benjamin, appear at the beginnings of their chapters along with the date and subject. They represent different age-groups, genders, races, belief systems and causes of blindness. They grew up in different eras with different rights under the law.
Witucki interweaves the two “points of view” with an uncommon agility. Her ability to blend action, dreams and memory allows their stories to unfold smoothly, drawing the reader into their separate worlds, even as she brings them closer together.
Music, literature, and the love of learning are lifelines throughout the book. The story takes place primarily in New Jersey with a train ride to Raleigh and a skiing trip to Vermont. It is recommended for senior high and older readers. All in all, an inspiring read, carefully constructed with clear, concise language, nuanced characters and unexpected twists. There’s so much in this book that I couldn’t resist a second read.
This superbly written, beautiful and honest story of a mentor relationship reaches into several worlds to expose the deepest pain and the greatest triumphs of the human spirit. It is told by two narrators. Their names, Tallie and Benjamin, appear at the beginnings of their chapters along with the date and subject. They represent different age-groups, genders, races, belief systems and causes of blindness. They grew up in different eras with different rights under the law.
Witucki interweaves the two “points of view” with an uncommon agility. Her ability to blend action, dreams and memory allows their stories to unfold smoothly, drawing the reader into their separate worlds, even as she brings them closer together.
Music, literature, and the love of learning are lifelines throughout the book. The story takes place primarily in New Jersey with a train ride to Raleigh and a skiing trip to Vermont. It is recommended for senior high and older readers. All in all, an inspiring read, carefully constructed with clear, concise language, nuanced characters and unexpected twists. There’s so much in this book that I couldn’t resist a second read.
January 7, 2023
This book is a hilarious book for people to read if they have ever worked or experienced with the field of vision impairments. For people who are not in the field they may learn some things about blind and visual impairedness that they never knew very heartwarming and hilarious
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