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Anything But Okay
Stella and Farida have been best friends forever, but lately things have been tense. It all started when Stella's brother came home from his latest tour with the US Marines in Afghanistan paranoid and angry. But Stella won't talk about it, and Farida can tell she's keeping something from her.
Desperate to help Rob, Stella thinks she just needs to get him out of the house. She definitely didn't expect going to the movies to end with Rob in handcuffs for assaulting one of her classmates after his anger spiraled out of control.
When a video of the fight goes viral, everyone has an opinion of Stella and her "violent vet" brother.
The entire school takes sides, the media labels Rob a terrorist sympathizer, and even Farida is dragged into the mess despite not being there. As the story continues trending, Stella will have to decide just how far she's willing to go for the truth, even if it means admitting her own failures.
Desperate to help Rob, Stella thinks she just needs to get him out of the house. She definitely didn't expect going to the movies to end with Rob in handcuffs for assaulting one of her classmates after his anger spiraled out of control.
When a video of the fight goes viral, everyone has an opinion of Stella and her "violent vet" brother.
The entire school takes sides, the media labels Rob a terrorist sympathizer, and even Farida is dragged into the mess despite not being there. As the story continues trending, Stella will have to decide just how far she's willing to go for the truth, even if it means admitting her own failures.
352 pages, Hardcover
First published October 9, 2018
54 people are currently reading
1956 people want to read
About the author
Sarah Darer Littman
16 books526 followersSarah Darer Littman is an award-winning author of books for teens. She lives in Connecticut, in a house that never seems to have enough bookshelves.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 124 reviews
July 5, 2019
I should have liked ANYTHING BUT OKAY. I’m usually a big Sarah Darer Littman fan, but this one felt like a Book With An Agenda. I even agree with the agenda, but didn’t think the manner in which Littman repeatedly spoon fed the issues (racism, Islamaphobia, #WhitePrivilege and taking care of vets because war is Bad) to readers.
At the start of ANYTHING BUT OKAY, I thought Littman’s heavy-handedness was a way to introduce upper MG and younger YA readers to the important subjects. The character Farida repeatedly calls out narrator Stella for not noticing her Privilege when watching movies and in life. She seems to blame a Stella for being white with the heavy expectation the teen get it right 100% of the time. I think asking a teenager to notice every time a person of color is treated differently than the majority is too much given the developmental egocentricity part of maturation, especially given their brains are still growing until age twenty-five. Of course, Farida is in the same life stage and I understood wanting her best friend to truly get it. I’m not sure Littman’s use of Farida’s approach is the best way to communicate the important lesson of Privilege.
Stella’s brother Rob is depressed and has PTSD which gets worse after his comrade commits suicide. Littman repeatedly tells readers how bad war is and how little we do for vets in emotional distress through Stella’s thoughts and feelings. I wish Littman gave her readers more credit that showing would be more affective than telling after the first go around.
ANYTHING BUT OKAY reads like a book written by an adult to educate readers on Big Issues. I still think a Littman is a great writer and will look for her next book to get back on track.
At the start of ANYTHING BUT OKAY, I thought Littman’s heavy-handedness was a way to introduce upper MG and younger YA readers to the important subjects. The character Farida repeatedly calls out narrator Stella for not noticing her Privilege when watching movies and in life. She seems to blame a Stella for being white with the heavy expectation the teen get it right 100% of the time. I think asking a teenager to notice every time a person of color is treated differently than the majority is too much given the developmental egocentricity part of maturation, especially given their brains are still growing until age twenty-five. Of course, Farida is in the same life stage and I understood wanting her best friend to truly get it. I’m not sure Littman’s use of Farida’s approach is the best way to communicate the important lesson of Privilege.
Stella’s brother Rob is depressed and has PTSD which gets worse after his comrade commits suicide. Littman repeatedly tells readers how bad war is and how little we do for vets in emotional distress through Stella’s thoughts and feelings. I wish Littman gave her readers more credit that showing would be more affective than telling after the first go around.
ANYTHING BUT OKAY reads like a book written by an adult to educate readers on Big Issues. I still think a Littman is a great writer and will look for her next book to get back on track.
August 27, 2020
I have rarely read anything that felt so preachy. I read issue driven books all the time and some of them are based around general messages, but this book almost felt like listening to a sermon. I didn't disagree with the message at all.
A lot of this book focused on Islamophobia and racism, with a secondary issue of veterans not being taken care of once they return home. I definitely agree with all of that. But it was so painfully heavy handed and that was the entire point of this book existing. The story and character development didn't matter nearly so much as the Message, and I'm not reading this book to be taught what is honestly a very basic lesson. Maybe it would have been more interesting had it delved deeper into these issues, but it was a bit surface level.
I would've understood this book better had it been intended for a much younger audience. Like maybe if she'd written it for eight year olds, the preachy-ness would have made more sense and been more appropriate. But it felt like geared toward 15 year olds, and they don't need the same message driven into their heads every other page for an entire novel.
One specific issue I had was with the main character's best friend, Farida. I believe (although I'm writing this review weeks later so I'm basing this on other people's reviews) that Farida is an Iraqi-American who also happens to be Muslim. Her entire role in this book is to call out Stella for her white privilege. Here's the thing, it's great when characters are able to call out each other for privilege and great to see characters accepting that and learning from it. But that was Farida's entire role in the book. That was the only thing she ever did. I don't know pretty much anything about her character because every conversation she had was just pointing out Stella's privilege and everything Stella was doing wrong. This was true even when Stella's brother was in jail and going through a mental health crisis. Even when the (I think) candidate for governor was calling for Stella's brother publicly to face long time in jail. Even when Stella was being bullied and harassed and her home vandalized. Farida still took this time to inform Stella how bad that was for her. Normally I wouldn't be so critical of this because I am white and I wouldn't want to talk over any people of color discussing their experiences, but the author is also white. And Farida's character felt so poorly done and tokenized.
I just get so irritated being preached to constantly. A few points I don't mind too much, or if the book has a vague general theme it's pushing, but in this book it was constant and heavy handed and shoving it down my throat. If I hadn't already been so on board with the messages themselves, I don't think this would have even managed two stars.
At the end of the day, a novel has to tell a good story. That's what it is. This didn't feel like a story so much as a painfully drawn out after school special. It dragged for me and I really couldn't find myself recommending this to anyone.
A lot of this book focused on Islamophobia and racism, with a secondary issue of veterans not being taken care of once they return home. I definitely agree with all of that. But it was so painfully heavy handed and that was the entire point of this book existing. The story and character development didn't matter nearly so much as the Message, and I'm not reading this book to be taught what is honestly a very basic lesson. Maybe it would have been more interesting had it delved deeper into these issues, but it was a bit surface level.
I would've understood this book better had it been intended for a much younger audience. Like maybe if she'd written it for eight year olds, the preachy-ness would have made more sense and been more appropriate. But it felt like geared toward 15 year olds, and they don't need the same message driven into their heads every other page for an entire novel.
One specific issue I had was with the main character's best friend, Farida. I believe (although I'm writing this review weeks later so I'm basing this on other people's reviews) that Farida is an Iraqi-American who also happens to be Muslim. Her entire role in this book is to call out Stella for her white privilege. Here's the thing, it's great when characters are able to call out each other for privilege and great to see characters accepting that and learning from it. But that was Farida's entire role in the book. That was the only thing she ever did. I don't know pretty much anything about her character because every conversation she had was just pointing out Stella's privilege and everything Stella was doing wrong. This was true even when Stella's brother was in jail and going through a mental health crisis. Even when the (I think) candidate for governor was calling for Stella's brother publicly to face long time in jail. Even when Stella was being bullied and harassed and her home vandalized. Farida still took this time to inform Stella how bad that was for her. Normally I wouldn't be so critical of this because I am white and I wouldn't want to talk over any people of color discussing their experiences, but the author is also white. And Farida's character felt so poorly done and tokenized.
I just get so irritated being preached to constantly. A few points I don't mind too much, or if the book has a vague general theme it's pushing, but in this book it was constant and heavy handed and shoving it down my throat. If I hadn't already been so on board with the messages themselves, I don't think this would have even managed two stars.
At the end of the day, a novel has to tell a good story. That's what it is. This didn't feel like a story so much as a painfully drawn out after school special. It dragged for me and I really couldn't find myself recommending this to anyone.
September 8, 2021
This was an interesting book to read right after the U.S. withdrawal from Afghanistan and two weeks away from a federal election in Canada. It was a timely and thought-provoking novel to put it mildly.
I appreciated how this book was written and plain English so that it’s accessible to the young readers this book was destined to but also easily understood by the perhaps bigoted older reader (often through no fault of their own because that’s just the world we live in) who might stumble upon it. I also enjoyed that it tackled several social issues head on, notably the lack of support for veterans in transitioning back to civilian life, but also the polarization of politics (and the people who suffer because of it) and the power of an individual’s voice.
The only thing that really got on my nerves was the fact that literally all of the characters are unidimensional and lack any and all depth. Basically Stella is nothing but clueless, Rob is only ever portrayed as a complete train wreck and it seems like Farida’s only purpose is to call out everyone else on their shortcomings. The novel really lacked depth in that regards. It was a good intro to contemporary issues, but barely scratched the surface beyond that.
Overall I would give this book 3.5 stars but I’m rounding it up to 4 stars because of the importance of this story. I would recommend it to teen readers trying to make sense of the craziness happening around them in a world that is so beautifully diverse but so seldom appreciated for what it really is.
I appreciated how this book was written and plain English so that it’s accessible to the young readers this book was destined to but also easily understood by the perhaps bigoted older reader (often through no fault of their own because that’s just the world we live in) who might stumble upon it. I also enjoyed that it tackled several social issues head on, notably the lack of support for veterans in transitioning back to civilian life, but also the polarization of politics (and the people who suffer because of it) and the power of an individual’s voice.
The only thing that really got on my nerves was the fact that literally all of the characters are unidimensional and lack any and all depth. Basically Stella is nothing but clueless, Rob is only ever portrayed as a complete train wreck and it seems like Farida’s only purpose is to call out everyone else on their shortcomings. The novel really lacked depth in that regards. It was a good intro to contemporary issues, but barely scratched the surface beyond that.
Overall I would give this book 3.5 stars but I’m rounding it up to 4 stars because of the importance of this story. I would recommend it to teen readers trying to make sense of the craziness happening around them in a world that is so beautifully diverse but so seldom appreciated for what it really is.
January 7, 2024
Eh.. the writing was mid, and I didn’t rlly like how MC’s best friend blamed MC for literally everything negative that happened in the book. MC’s best friend was acting as if MC was some undercover racist… meanwhile MC was simply just slightly uneducated. I liked MC’s brother tho! His struggles were so real and I liked how the author showed that ppl who come home from war don’t just struggle physically — they struggle mentally as well.
March 23, 2019
There were things I liked about this book and things I didn’t, so I’ll say both. I really liked the character Rob and how the author tackled tough issues, such as PTSD and racism. What I didn’t like was how unlikable many of the characters were. Rashida brought up many good points about how people are mistreated, but she also seemed to love shaming people and to point out how ignorant they were and how they could never understand her problems. Stella was self-centered and simple minded, and her relationship with whatever that guy’s name was seemed more like instalove than anything worthwhile that the author built up to. I hate to be so negative, but I think the way some of the characters were written overshadowed the importance of the issues discussed in the book.
January 22, 2019
It was okay, but I honest got tired of Farida calling out Stella’s mistakes all the time. I get that she was hurt, but everyone makes mistakes, and Stella already apologized dozens of times.
August 6, 2018
@kidlitexchange #partner
Thank you to the #KidLitExchange network for the review copy of Anything But Okay. All opinions are my own.
Stella is a junior in high school, but her older brother just came back from his second tour in Afghanistan. He came back a completely different person, angry and moody, but none of the adults in her family want to talk to Stella about it. Meanwhile, Stella also has to worry running for junior class president. Her friend, Farida, wanted to run, but her parents had convinced her not to because of the political climate in the town at that time (Farida's family are Iraqi-Muslims who moved to the United States).
One day, Stella's older brother, Rob, loses control and punches someone, getting arrested. This leads to rumors of "terrorist sympathizer" and "violent vet". The entire school (and town) takes sides and all of Stella's relationships are suffering.
I really liked this novel. Although I don't have any close personal connections to any veterans, from an outside perspective I think that Sarah Darer Littman did a good job at portraying what it's like to come home different than how you left. She points us into important conversations about how we treat our veterans, even after everything they've done for us. The author shows us how hard high school can be on its own and then how adding in racism and politics can make it worse.
My one complaint is Stella's friend, Farida. She does her best to try to show Stella where she experiences white privilege and why her life is different just because of where her family came from. However, it doesn't always sound like it's coming from a friend/educational standpoint. Sometimes she seems very rude about it, even though Stella is supposed to be her best friend and just doesn't know any better. But either way, having her character there leads us to that important conversation too, so I suppose it's for the best. :)
This title releases October 9, 2018.
#books #bookstagram #reviewer #ARC #ireadtoo #igbooks #igreads
Thank you to the #KidLitExchange network for the review copy of Anything But Okay. All opinions are my own.
Stella is a junior in high school, but her older brother just came back from his second tour in Afghanistan. He came back a completely different person, angry and moody, but none of the adults in her family want to talk to Stella about it. Meanwhile, Stella also has to worry running for junior class president. Her friend, Farida, wanted to run, but her parents had convinced her not to because of the political climate in the town at that time (Farida's family are Iraqi-Muslims who moved to the United States).
One day, Stella's older brother, Rob, loses control and punches someone, getting arrested. This leads to rumors of "terrorist sympathizer" and "violent vet". The entire school (and town) takes sides and all of Stella's relationships are suffering.
I really liked this novel. Although I don't have any close personal connections to any veterans, from an outside perspective I think that Sarah Darer Littman did a good job at portraying what it's like to come home different than how you left. She points us into important conversations about how we treat our veterans, even after everything they've done for us. The author shows us how hard high school can be on its own and then how adding in racism and politics can make it worse.
My one complaint is Stella's friend, Farida. She does her best to try to show Stella where she experiences white privilege and why her life is different just because of where her family came from. However, it doesn't always sound like it's coming from a friend/educational standpoint. Sometimes she seems very rude about it, even though Stella is supposed to be her best friend and just doesn't know any better. But either way, having her character there leads us to that important conversation too, so I suppose it's for the best. :)
This title releases October 9, 2018.
#books #bookstagram #reviewer #ARC #ireadtoo #igbooks #igreads
February 23, 2020
Anything but Okay was a book about a girl named Stella who was caught in the mess of her brother's actions, trying to reconcile the friendship she has with her best friend, Farida, all the while running for class president. The book just kept repeating the same topic so basically you could skip all dialogue when it came to Stella and Farida. The main plot is helping Rob and Farida who are both struggling being called un-American because of Rob did and because of Farida's skin color and religion. I liked having all types of forms of writing like: text, letters, and transcript. Stella wasn't a very good best friend for Farida to depend on. I know they both had hard times but Stella's troubles barely started unlike Farida who has been explaning that's shes just as American as white people. And Stella's lucky to have a best friend like that who never gave up on her. The plot didn't intrigue me as much as I would have like it to, but it kept me reading. I don't think I enjoyed it THAT much but im giving this an okay 2.5!
July 7, 2020
I liked this book. I liked that it included discussions on veteran’s mental health and ignorance regarding race, ethnicity, and religion, and politics. I didn’t expect it to go where it did and I think for teen readers it’s good to see characters who grow and change in their beliefs. It’s also good for them to see characters who make mistakes when advocating for issues they care about because of their privilege and not let the call out get them defensive and stop them from trying anymore.
May 18, 2021
Opened my eyes to a world I didn't know existed, and to a lot of problems, I absolutely loved life, after by Sarah Darer Littman, and I loved this book, definitely would recommend. I will officially read anything she published. Also off the main plot, the romance made me smile, it was very nice and the characters development was definitely shown and it was in a good way for sure!!
March 28, 2019
Review coming soon.
July 29, 2019
3.5 stars
Anything but Okay is a good book about racism and how everyone can make a difference to stop bullying. It is also about how the media can twist things and how “just because it’s trending doesn’t mean it’s true.” We follow the protagonist, Stella Walker, whose brother recently has come back from fighting in Afghanistan. But the brother who comes back isn’t the brother she knows, he’s moody and closed off. Stella thinks she just needs to get him out of the house, but she definitely didn’t expect him to get arrested after assaulting one of Stella’s classmates.
On top of this, Stella is running for class president for her friend Farida because Farida wants to see a change in the school’s bullying people who come from a different country.
Great easy summer read.
Anything but Okay is a good book about racism and how everyone can make a difference to stop bullying. It is also about how the media can twist things and how “just because it’s trending doesn’t mean it’s true.” We follow the protagonist, Stella Walker, whose brother recently has come back from fighting in Afghanistan. But the brother who comes back isn’t the brother she knows, he’s moody and closed off. Stella thinks she just needs to get him out of the house, but she definitely didn’t expect him to get arrested after assaulting one of Stella’s classmates.
On top of this, Stella is running for class president for her friend Farida because Farida wants to see a change in the school’s bullying people who come from a different country.
Great easy summer read.
September 13, 2018
Disclaimer: I received this book via KidLitExchange. Thanks! All opinions are my own.
Rating: 4/5
Publication Date: October 9th, 2018
Genre: YA Contemporary
Recommended Age: 14+ (PTSD, racism, violence, mature scenes)
Pages: 352
Author Website
Amazon Link
Synopsis: Stella and Farida have been best friends forever, but lately things have been tense. It all started when Stella's brother came home from his latest tour with the US Marines in Afghanistan paranoid and angry. But Stella won't talk about it, and Farida can tell she's keeping something from her.
Desperate to help Rob, Stella thinks she just needs to get him out of the house. She definitely didn't expect going to the movies to end with Rob in handcuffs for assaulting one of her classmates after his anger spiraled out of control.
When a video of the fight goes viral, everyone has an opinion of Stella and her "violent vet" brother.
The entire school takes sides, the media labels Rob a terrorist sympathizer, and even Farida is dragged into the mess despite not being there. As the story continues trending, Stella will have to decide just how far she's willing to go for the truth, even if it means admitting her own failures.
I thought this book did really good with showing PTSD, how vets are different when they come home, and racism, although I’m not a person who experiences either so please don’t take my statement as fact and seek out reviewers who do experience these things. I also thought the character development, plot, and writing were all really well done.
However, I do feel that the pacing was a bit slow at times and I felt a disconnection between the relationship of the two friends Stella and Farida. It didn’t really feel like two teen girls and their relationship just felt off to me.
Verdict: A great story with some tough topics.
Rating: 4/5
Publication Date: October 9th, 2018
Genre: YA Contemporary
Recommended Age: 14+ (PTSD, racism, violence, mature scenes)
Pages: 352
Author Website
Amazon Link
Synopsis: Stella and Farida have been best friends forever, but lately things have been tense. It all started when Stella's brother came home from his latest tour with the US Marines in Afghanistan paranoid and angry. But Stella won't talk about it, and Farida can tell she's keeping something from her.
Desperate to help Rob, Stella thinks she just needs to get him out of the house. She definitely didn't expect going to the movies to end with Rob in handcuffs for assaulting one of her classmates after his anger spiraled out of control.
When a video of the fight goes viral, everyone has an opinion of Stella and her "violent vet" brother.
The entire school takes sides, the media labels Rob a terrorist sympathizer, and even Farida is dragged into the mess despite not being there. As the story continues trending, Stella will have to decide just how far she's willing to go for the truth, even if it means admitting her own failures.
I thought this book did really good with showing PTSD, how vets are different when they come home, and racism, although I’m not a person who experiences either so please don’t take my statement as fact and seek out reviewers who do experience these things. I also thought the character development, plot, and writing were all really well done.
However, I do feel that the pacing was a bit slow at times and I felt a disconnection between the relationship of the two friends Stella and Farida. It didn’t really feel like two teen girls and their relationship just felt off to me.
Verdict: A great story with some tough topics.
July 12, 2018
It's Stella Walker's junior year and she’s a lot going on. Her brother Rob just returned from a tour in Afghanistan with PTSD, her best friend Farida is being called a terrorist at school, and Stella is running for president against the two most popular people in her school.
Because of Rob, things have been tense, and they only get worse when he assaults one of Stella's classmates at the mall. Stella and her friends know the truth behind the assault, but because of social media, people make up their own truths, including the Mayor, whose son is running against Stella for president. Now, everyone is calling Rob a violent veteran and Stella and her family have been labeled as terrorist sympathizers. As the campaign continues, Stella has to figure out how she can win the presidential race, and if telling the truth will help or hurt her case.
Anything But Okay is a strong novel for young adults as the topics discussed are reflected in today's society and relevant to current events teens are facing today. The story, told in Stella's perspective, gives teens a protagonist they can relate to; one that can help them understand problems they may be facing and solutions to get through them.
VERDICT—Anything But Okay is a great addition to any collection for young adults due to its dialogue on contemporary issues faced by society today.
Because of Rob, things have been tense, and they only get worse when he assaults one of Stella's classmates at the mall. Stella and her friends know the truth behind the assault, but because of social media, people make up their own truths, including the Mayor, whose son is running against Stella for president. Now, everyone is calling Rob a violent veteran and Stella and her family have been labeled as terrorist sympathizers. As the campaign continues, Stella has to figure out how she can win the presidential race, and if telling the truth will help or hurt her case.
Anything But Okay is a strong novel for young adults as the topics discussed are reflected in today's society and relevant to current events teens are facing today. The story, told in Stella's perspective, gives teens a protagonist they can relate to; one that can help them understand problems they may be facing and solutions to get through them.
VERDICT—Anything But Okay is a great addition to any collection for young adults due to its dialogue on contemporary issues faced by society today.
February 3, 2023
The book is amazing and I will 100% recommend this to anyone because it covers important topics.
The only other thing that I would complain about is that the book seems to be on a merry-go-round about the same issue multiple times, I feel like it could have cut at least 2-3 chapters if it didn’t keep going back to the same thing; other than that, a great story.
The only other thing that I would complain about is that the book seems to be on a merry-go-round about the same issue multiple times, I feel like it could have cut at least 2-3 chapters if it didn’t keep going back to the same thing; other than that, a great story.
January 11, 2021
I’ve had this book kind of sitting around so I wanted to try reading it. I think my main gripe with the book was the exposition and characters. Stella is a white girl with white privilege who doesn’t quite understand all her faults. While Ferida was a good character and did her best to tell Stella the problems with some of the things Stella thought, she just wasn’t my favorite character. I think this book handled ptsd and what veterans deal with in a good way especially since this book is targeted towards more middle grade. It was just the writing for me. The characters felt unnatural and the romance plot line felt stale and didn’t need to happen in my opinion. I feel there could have been better things in this book, but for what it is I do think it’s a good book for younger audiences, it just wasn’t for me.
December 20, 2021
This book was really engaging right off the bat, I think students can get into the layers of conflict going on, lots of areas for windows and/or mirrors all in one text. I did see lots of reviews that said this book got a bit preachy, but it seemed to try and educate people around certain issues more explicitly throughout the plot. For a lot of YA readers, that is a big help as they may lack background knowledge to pick up subtle references.
I particularly enjoyed the focus on need for more veteran care. I haven’t really seen other books reflect on that population, so it was helpful to see unfold. I will certainly add this to my library shelf
I particularly enjoyed the focus on need for more veteran care. I haven’t really seen other books reflect on that population, so it was helpful to see unfold. I will certainly add this to my library shelf
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December 12, 2019i didn't really injoy this book i didnt find that i liked about this book
January 5, 2020
This one is a 3.5 for me. I tend to like books by this author because she features teens dealing with important life issues and not just matters such as what color the favors at the Prom should be. While the book is a bit didactic what with all the comments about white privilege from certain characters, the author trusts that her readers can handle these tough topics and come to their own conclusions. Junior Stella Walker is worried about her older brother, Rob, recently returned from his second stint in Afghanistan. He's moody, quiet, and stays mainly in his room. After a service buddy commits suicide even while Rob is trying to provide support, he becomes even more depressed, eventually engaging in an altercation with two of his sister's classmates at the mall. The media and the town's mayor who is running for governor pick up on the incident since he was defending a young Sikh who was cleaning tables and the floor and because Stella's best friend, Farida, is Muslim. As some politicians do, he plays on the fears and biases of voters to gain support. Meanwhile, Stella is running for junior class president against two classmates that are more popular than her but are running on false promises or fluff. With the encouragement of Farida and Adam, her new romantic interest, she takes a stand on issues that really matter and how to improve their school. But having a brother who has been labeled a terrorist and Muslim lover does little to help her campaign. The author has included texts or emails Rob sends to Jason, his buddy, that show just how much he's struggling to get back to normal and how frustrating it is to have to wait to get help. There are times when readers will be very concerned about Rob's mental health, and it's clear just how worried Stella is about him even as she goes about her school days. If the author's purpose here was to highlight the lack of resources for veterans suffering from PTSD and to question the pointlessness of war, then she's certainly succeeded here and has raised awareness about some important issues. But she's also tackled ethical dilemmas such as being truthful and honest versus winning at all costs, something many teens will face in their own lives. As a privileged white woman, it's hard to read some of Farida's comments about white privilege without feeling a bit guilty or defensive, and she can be hard to take at times since this seems to be her major sounding point. While it does get old, I have to give her points for being honest with her friend and speaking her mind. After all, how can we ever learn unless someone points the way for us and helps us understand what we haven't experienced? The book made me think, and it will prompt some reflection on the part of many teen readers.
February 25, 2019
This book should be required reading for everyMS/HS in America. Stella goes to a "normal" HS where students often listen to their parents and past on stereotypes that are uninformed and wrong. Stella's BBF is Farida, an immigrant. Stella's brother has just returned from two tours of duty in Afghanistan and is having severe trouble adjusting to civilian life. One of his buddies died, another lost both his legs, and a third is having severe PTSD. Stella is wondering what has happen to her happy go lucky brother. At school she is dealing with the usual jerks. She is trying to decide whether to run for Junior Class President. Also running is Cole-the mayor's son- and the "soft toilet paper' candidate. Stella treats her brother to his favorite movie. Afterwards they go to the food court to get ice cream. They see a food service worker being harassed and the brother takes a stand and Stella's life is never the same.
I HATE preachy books. This book, however, was so finely crafted that even though I was being preached to it never felt that way. Being from small town America I often see and hear the attitudes that are expressed in this book. I just wish every school had a Stella to stand up for what is right.
"It turns out there are as many definitions of what makes someone a patriot as there are people to interview" -Stella
"No one expects youth speak for all white girls, Stella, but they sure expect me to speak for all Muslins" -Farida
"More like some people matter more than others to the folks that make decisions." -Dad
"Is it more important to do the right thing or is it more important to win?" Rob
"I've been wrestling with the idea of truth and understanding how much our perception of it can depend on who tells the story and how it's told. I starting to realize how much of what is taken for granted as true about life and my country is because of who got to tell the story." -Stella
"It's okay to ask for help and accept it when people offer it. " Mrs. Cook
"life gets real messy, too but we can't just turn our backs on the world when that happens, no matter how difficult and painful it gets." -Stella
"We're all just walking each other Home." Ram Dss
I HATE preachy books. This book, however, was so finely crafted that even though I was being preached to it never felt that way. Being from small town America I often see and hear the attitudes that are expressed in this book. I just wish every school had a Stella to stand up for what is right.
"It turns out there are as many definitions of what makes someone a patriot as there are people to interview" -Stella
"No one expects youth speak for all white girls, Stella, but they sure expect me to speak for all Muslins" -Farida
"More like some people matter more than others to the folks that make decisions." -Dad
"Is it more important to do the right thing or is it more important to win?" Rob
"I've been wrestling with the idea of truth and understanding how much our perception of it can depend on who tells the story and how it's told. I starting to realize how much of what is taken for granted as true about life and my country is because of who got to tell the story." -Stella
"It's okay to ask for help and accept it when people offer it. " Mrs. Cook
"life gets real messy, too but we can't just turn our backs on the world when that happens, no matter how difficult and painful it gets." -Stella
"We're all just walking each other Home." Ram Dss
July 29, 2020
I should have quit back in the first chapter when the best friend got on my nerves with her holier than thou attitude, but I kept reading, hoping it would get better.
I really wanted to like this book, but I think the only redeeming part was the storyline about Stella's brother Rob. And even that could have been done better.
Stella is a junior in high school, a white girl whose BFF since first grade is Farida, a Muslim immigrant from Iraq. Stella's brother is a combat veteran with PTSD and depression, and her family is struggling with that along with some other issues that are related to that. Yet Farida constantly berates and belittles Stella for wearing "white girl glasses" (yes, they really call it that) and not being sympathetic to what Farida and her family are facing, being called "terrorists". Even though she is white, Stella and her family are suffering from stereotyping and bullying, both online and in person, yet "best friend" Farida acts as the antithesis of how a best friend should. Rather than commiserating and having her friend's back, Farida adds to Stella's problems for the majority of the book by blaming all of her own family's troubles on Stella.
Check out this direct quote from Chapter 10, where Stella is once again, apologizing for her whiteness and for not being able to see things from her "friend's" point of view:
The "situation" that Farida is referring to is not Stella's responsibility, but Farida keeps lashing out as if it is, and Stella keeps taking the abuse and apologizing for it.
I will say the last few chapters pulled this overall review up from one star to two, but the majority of the reading was an absolute beating for me.
I really wanted to like this book, but I think the only redeeming part was the storyline about Stella's brother Rob. And even that could have been done better.
Stella is a junior in high school, a white girl whose BFF since first grade is Farida, a Muslim immigrant from Iraq. Stella's brother is a combat veteran with PTSD and depression, and her family is struggling with that along with some other issues that are related to that. Yet Farida constantly berates and belittles Stella for wearing "white girl glasses" (yes, they really call it that) and not being sympathetic to what Farida and her family are facing, being called "terrorists". Even though she is white, Stella and her family are suffering from stereotyping and bullying, both online and in person, yet "best friend" Farida acts as the antithesis of how a best friend should. Rather than commiserating and having her friend's back, Farida adds to Stella's problems for the majority of the book by blaming all of her own family's troubles on Stella.
Check out this direct quote from Chapter 10, where Stella is once again, apologizing for her whiteness and for not being able to see things from her "friend's" point of view:
The "situation" that Farida is referring to is not Stella's responsibility, but Farida keeps lashing out as if it is, and Stella keeps taking the abuse and apologizing for it.
I will say the last few chapters pulled this overall review up from one star to two, but the majority of the reading was an absolute beating for me.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
May 6, 2022
Anything But Okay is seen through the eyes of Stella, a junior in high school living alongside her brother Rob who recently returned from his second tour in Afghanistan. Along with the usual stresses of high school, her best friend Farida convinced her to run for the junior class president elections. With her best friends Farida and Ken, Stella prepares to face off in the junior election in hopes of defeating Chris Abbott, son of the mayor, in the election. One day Stella decides to bring Rob to see a movie hoping to ease his recent stress and paranoia. She never expected Rob to leave clad in handcuffs after assaulting one of her classmates and breaking their nose. Although the truth was clear to Stella that it was provoked, the video of the assault is released on social media showing only the attack. This event splits Stella’s world in two. Everyone from the media, to her school, to her own friends and family seem to have taken sides from the post, with some proclaiming Rob as a symbol of violence in veterans, and others defending it as lies by the media.
Overall, each individual topic of the story is addressed in a fair and honest manner. But I can’t help but feel that the book attempted to tackle too many issues at once, detracting from the power and emotion of the others. There were so many backstories in this book I wanted to read more about like Rob’s experiences in Afghanistan, Chris Abbott’s perspective, Farida’s experiences while helping, and many more. When I read this book, I found myself conflicted. On the one hand, it addresses serious real-life issues ranging from racial discrimination, to mistreatment and care for veterans. On the other hand, it ties in a large quantity of humor and although I commend Litterman’s attempt to shine a light on serious issues, it was a little much.
Overall, each individual topic of the story is addressed in a fair and honest manner. But I can’t help but feel that the book attempted to tackle too many issues at once, detracting from the power and emotion of the others. There were so many backstories in this book I wanted to read more about like Rob’s experiences in Afghanistan, Chris Abbott’s perspective, Farida’s experiences while helping, and many more. When I read this book, I found myself conflicted. On the one hand, it addresses serious real-life issues ranging from racial discrimination, to mistreatment and care for veterans. On the other hand, it ties in a large quantity of humor and although I commend Litterman’s attempt to shine a light on serious issues, it was a little much.
February 24, 2020
Firstly,I can say that I really did enjoy the book and I really liked the ending. Instead of Stella winning the election,Chris does. Which I like because I hate it when characters have everything go there way in the end. In this book the ending shows Stella’s family winning some and losing some. Speaking of wins,I did really like how Stella’s boyfriend,Adam was written(though in the beginning of the book I thought Stella and Farida would be getting together). He was corny and goofy but he was also a sweetheart that really cared for Stella. I do feel however,that it was a little out of place. This book talks about a lot of things and a love storyline felt like a bit much. However,the whole army vet story was something I feel was quite masterful. It was well done,had a strong message and made you feel bad. Not just for Rob but all the army vets that have come back. In contrast,the character Farida,is definitely the worst part of the book. While I understand the purpose behind including her that still doesn’t really change the fact that she’s basic,annoying and static. In fact,one of the best things about this book is how some of the characters develop. Stella goes from a selfish,bratty teenager to a caring little sister. Chris goes from a racist daddy’s boy to a kid who’s trapped. Rob(My second favorite character behind Adam) goes from a out of control army veteran to a man trying to get his issues under control. Farida,however, goes from a friend who constantly shakes her friends and gets offended much too easily to a friend who constantly shakes her friends and gets offended much too easily. She’s the only reason I give this book 3 Stars.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
October 18, 2023
I really enjoyed this book overall. It did a great job of incorporating the civilians perspective that live in a military household. It also showed how quickly rumors can start in school and spread, especially now with social media. It has the preserverance of true friendship...those that stick with you no matter what. It was a little weighted, IMO, on the "white privilege" aspect, especially for a book that is likely to be picked up by military families. I did appreciate the main characters reflections about "seeing the other side" of the story and trying to understand each other.
The story has some heavy moments in it, dealing with veteran PTSD(from multiple vets and wars), and a veteran suicide. The book was clean of curse words or anything obscene or too graphic. There is some minor romance.
I had hoped to put it into my school library(up to 6th grade), but based on the romance level and a couple other more intense scenes have decided it wouldn't be a great fit. I can always loan it to a student as a personal copy if I feel it would be a good read for them and their parents. I would say best age group for this book is 15+, possibly 12+ if they have had exposure to the veteran world and the unique experiences that life brings. I do feel this is a great book for teens to understand some of our vets a little better, understand the good and bad of social media and rumors, and show what true friendship should look like. And it is so nice to have it in text that doesn't need to have vulgar language or graphic love scenes.
The story has some heavy moments in it, dealing with veteran PTSD(from multiple vets and wars), and a veteran suicide. The book was clean of curse words or anything obscene or too graphic. There is some minor romance.
I had hoped to put it into my school library(up to 6th grade), but based on the romance level and a couple other more intense scenes have decided it wouldn't be a great fit. I can always loan it to a student as a personal copy if I feel it would be a good read for them and their parents. I would say best age group for this book is 15+, possibly 12+ if they have had exposure to the veteran world and the unique experiences that life brings. I do feel this is a great book for teens to understand some of our vets a little better, understand the good and bad of social media and rumors, and show what true friendship should look like. And it is so nice to have it in text that doesn't need to have vulgar language or graphic love scenes.
June 26, 2023
I really wanted to like this book, but I just couldn't. The issues with the brother, Rob, I really liked. I felt the author touched on how vets are not getting help for their PTSD and how politicians use them to gain for themselves quite well.
The friendship between Stella and Farida, I just couldn't get behind it. It didn't feel like a friendship, but more like Farida was always trying to teach Stella something or was getting mad at her for not getting it. Throughout the whole book, I felt like Stella, and sometimes Ken, was always apologizing to Farida about something they didn't understand or didn't get right away. Stella is white. Ken is white. Farida is a Muslim whose parents are from Iraq. They are living different lives and throughout this book, it felt like because Stella and Ken don't get what Farida is going through in their school/town she was constantly getting upset at them. Even after Rob gets in trouble Farida made it about her family and what was going to happen to them because of what Rob had done.
Honestly, I felt there were only a couple of times in the book where Stella and Farida were just hanging out as friends. The rest of the time it felt like Farida was telling Stella what she was doing wrong or Stella was thinking about how her actions would make Farida feel.
This book was a good idea, but I just don't think it hit the mark.
The friendship between Stella and Farida, I just couldn't get behind it. It didn't feel like a friendship, but more like Farida was always trying to teach Stella something or was getting mad at her for not getting it. Throughout the whole book, I felt like Stella, and sometimes Ken, was always apologizing to Farida about something they didn't understand or didn't get right away. Stella is white. Ken is white. Farida is a Muslim whose parents are from Iraq. They are living different lives and throughout this book, it felt like because Stella and Ken don't get what Farida is going through in their school/town she was constantly getting upset at them. Even after Rob gets in trouble Farida made it about her family and what was going to happen to them because of what Rob had done.
Honestly, I felt there were only a couple of times in the book where Stella and Farida were just hanging out as friends. The rest of the time it felt like Farida was telling Stella what she was doing wrong or Stella was thinking about how her actions would make Farida feel.
This book was a good idea, but I just don't think it hit the mark.
December 20, 2025
Full transparency: I did not finish this book because it was THAT bad.
I got through the first three chapters and immediately hated it. I pushed through a couple extra chapters, found myself starting to skim through pages, and ultimately skipped ahead and just read the ending.
There were like five different plots shoved into one and the MC didn’t really even feel like the MC.
I understand what the author was trying to do but she portrayed it in such an awful way. The best friend was HORRIBLE to MC. Constantly blaming her for racism and not dealing with racist issues the way best friend wanted her to. The way they spoke about it was awful too. “White girl goggles”? Seriously? There was a point in the book where the best friends are arguing because MC had told the boy she liked about her family issues. The MC goes to apologize to the best friend and the best friend says she’s mad and that MC should apologize because she “has to explain to her a million times why life is different for brown people”. I can understand where the best friend is coming from but she’s constantly putting down and belittling the MC for just being white. Which is what their whole friendship is based on. That’s literally a terrible best friend. There’s a difference between educating and what the best friend did in this.
I got through the first three chapters and immediately hated it. I pushed through a couple extra chapters, found myself starting to skim through pages, and ultimately skipped ahead and just read the ending.
There were like five different plots shoved into one and the MC didn’t really even feel like the MC.
I understand what the author was trying to do but she portrayed it in such an awful way. The best friend was HORRIBLE to MC. Constantly blaming her for racism and not dealing with racist issues the way best friend wanted her to. The way they spoke about it was awful too. “White girl goggles”? Seriously? There was a point in the book where the best friends are arguing because MC had told the boy she liked about her family issues. The MC goes to apologize to the best friend and the best friend says she’s mad and that MC should apologize because she “has to explain to her a million times why life is different for brown people”. I can understand where the best friend is coming from but she’s constantly putting down and belittling the MC for just being white. Which is what their whole friendship is based on. That’s literally a terrible best friend. There’s a difference between educating and what the best friend did in this.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
September 11, 2018
So you know how you get those books that have good elements, and some elements that are at first week but eventually become really good? This is one such book. I started reading it because it dealt with PTSD. The school plot line kind of annoyed me at first, and felt week in comparison to the story of Stella and her brother Rob, but then Littman wove the two stories together so powerfully, that I couldn't see why I thought any of the book should have been cut. Some of these characters made me want to yell in Mandalorian because of what jerks and hateful people they were, but that's kind of the point. Not the yelling at them part, the part where the book should make you see injustice and want to change it. Our Vets should be able to get proper care, and media should take the job seriously when it comes to how they report news, and how what we do in these areas impacts more than who we think it will. This is a thought provoking book, but it also has some very good and much needed levity. The bonds between the family members and friends were all depicted very well, and even some of the romance wasn't to annoying even if some of it came out of nowhere.
May 2, 2019
Stella'a brother is back from two tours in Afghanistan and he is not the same. If that wasn't enough on Stella's plate her best friend Farida constantly challenges her to think about what it might be like in her shoes and convinces her to run for class President. Trying to manage things on her own she takes her brother to the movies. The outing gets out of control and a local politician uses it and Stella's families friendship with Farida's family to further his political career.
I really like how Sarah Darer Littman tackles the world that our kids are living in now and shows how media can impact people and quickly. While I struggled a bit with Farida, I understood that she really just wanted Stella to see what it was like for her and was tired of having to explain over and over again how frustrating it can be to be in her shoes. Well written and the characters were mostly fleshed out, not so much the third friend Ken. I'd say 7th grade and up, due to the intense nature of the book and the realness, although mature 6th graders would be fine.
I really like how Sarah Darer Littman tackles the world that our kids are living in now and shows how media can impact people and quickly. While I struggled a bit with Farida, I understood that she really just wanted Stella to see what it was like for her and was tired of having to explain over and over again how frustrating it can be to be in her shoes. Well written and the characters were mostly fleshed out, not so much the third friend Ken. I'd say 7th grade and up, due to the intense nature of the book and the realness, although mature 6th graders would be fine.
August 18, 2020
Stella's normal life changed when her brother Rob came back from his second tour in Afghanistan. Her parents' lives seem to revolve around Rob and Stella always feels like she's walking on eggshells in her home. At school, Stella's friendship with her best friend Farida has started to get tense when Farida is tired of explaining to Stella the hardships she and her family face due to their heritage. With her friends suggestion and support, Stella decides to run for class president against her debate rival, whose father happens to also be running for governor with some anti-immigrant platforms. All of this, and when Stella gets her brother to go to a movie with her, an altercation occurs that goes viral that starts to cast Rob and his family in the wrong light.
To be honest, this book has a lot going on. For me, too much going on. There were so many storylines that could have been their own books. They weren't hard to follow, but I just felt having so many plotlines took away from some of the impact of others. The overall message and outcome are relevant today.
To be honest, this book has a lot going on. For me, too much going on. There were so many storylines that could have been their own books. They weren't hard to follow, but I just felt having so many plotlines took away from some of the impact of others. The overall message and outcome are relevant today.
January 10, 2023
“Anything but okay” is a YA fiction that deals with serious topics such as suicide, domestic violence, racism, and sexism.
Stella and Farida have been best friends ever since first grade, but lately, they haven’t been getting along very well. Ever since Stella’s brother Rob got back from serving in the war, he’s been different. Things start spiraling out of control when Rob punches one of Stella’s classmates for bullying a Sikh teen in the mall. When footage of the fight is released, it goes viral and the citizens of Virginia Beach form their own opinion of Rob. Due to the incident, Farida finds herself in the middle of this situation even though she had nothing to do with it. To make matters worse, Stella is having problems running for student president because of her brother. This mess can only be cleaned up by telling the truth, which Stella finds difficult to do.
Can Stella survive the horrors of what her brother has gotten himself into and can she fix the problem? Friends can come and go, but family is forever.
Recommended for ages 12+
Stella and Farida have been best friends ever since first grade, but lately, they haven’t been getting along very well. Ever since Stella’s brother Rob got back from serving in the war, he’s been different. Things start spiraling out of control when Rob punches one of Stella’s classmates for bullying a Sikh teen in the mall. When footage of the fight is released, it goes viral and the citizens of Virginia Beach form their own opinion of Rob. Due to the incident, Farida finds herself in the middle of this situation even though she had nothing to do with it. To make matters worse, Stella is having problems running for student president because of her brother. This mess can only be cleaned up by telling the truth, which Stella finds difficult to do.
Can Stella survive the horrors of what her brother has gotten himself into and can she fix the problem? Friends can come and go, but family is forever.
Recommended for ages 12+
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