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Almost Love
If it doesn't hurt, it's not love: the gripping new novel from the bestselling author of Asking for It. Perfect for fans of Marian Keyes and Jodi Picoult.
When Sarah falls for Matthew, she falls hard.
So it doesn't matter that he's twenty years older. That he sees her only in secret. That, slowly but surely, she's sacrificing everything else in her life to be with him.
Sarah's friends are worried. Her father can't understand how she could allow herself to be used like this. And she's on the verge of losing her job.
But Sarah can't help it. She is addicted to being desired by Matthew.
And love is supposed to hurt.
Isn't it?
When Sarah falls for Matthew, she falls hard.
So it doesn't matter that he's twenty years older. That he sees her only in secret. That, slowly but surely, she's sacrificing everything else in her life to be with him.
Sarah's friends are worried. Her father can't understand how she could allow herself to be used like this. And she's on the verge of losing her job.
But Sarah can't help it. She is addicted to being desired by Matthew.
And love is supposed to hurt.
Isn't it?
320 pages, Paperback
First published March 1, 2018
91 people are currently reading
5497 people want to read
About the author
Louise O'Neill
19 books2,291 followersLouise O' Neill is from Clonakilty, in west Cork. After graduating with a BA in English Studies at Trinity College Dublin, she went on to complete a post-grad in Fashion Buying at DIT. Having spent a year in New York working for Kate Lanphear, the senior Style Director of ELLE magazine, she returned home to Ireland to write her first novel.
She went from hanging out on set with A-list celebrities to spending most of her days in pyjamas while she writes, and has never been happier.
She went from hanging out on set with A-list celebrities to spending most of her days in pyjamas while she writes, and has never been happier.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 487 reviews
February 18, 2022
And I was left waiting and waiting and waiting, morning turning into afternoon, turning into evening, my world shrinking, folding itself around the phone, willing Matthew's name to flash onto the screen. The less he texted, the more I seemed to want him.
After the mindfuck that was O'Neill's Idol, I wasn't sure what to expect with this book but I expected it to be awful. And it was. But Almost Love is a very different book to Idol. It's a quick, sharp, painful read with a narrator who is simply horrible. I can see why some readers don't like it.
Reading Almost Love, I felt like I was bearing witness to some of the most self-destructive behaviour I've ever come across. Where Samantha in Idol was a messy character who I was able to empathise with in some ways, Sarah was a far more challenging character. She is one of those toxic people I would advise anyone I know to run the hell away from. It is unpleasant being inside her head.
I never liked her but I felt upset and embarrassed for Sarah. The reader can see her desperation and neediness for what it is even as she can't. You can see her family pulling away from her. You can feel her friends' disgust. Matthew is a classic sleazeball and it is cringey how you can see him playing mind games with her and Sarah falling for it.
This is one of those books where it is so frustrating because you feel like you want to intervene, to give the MC a good shake and somehow stop her from going off the rails. We probably couldn't anyway, but it is painful to watch someone have so much and destroy it.
June 22, 2018
"Love was holding your breath until they texted you. Love was waiting for them to decide that you're good enough."
Almost Love is a tough book because Sarah is a tough main character. Don't be fooled into believing that this is a romance novel. It is not, even if the title suggests otherwise. It's a book about obsessive love, unrequited love, fading love.
You won't like Sarah, the main character. You're not supposed to. You're not going to find an exciting and fast-paced plot. This is not what this book is about. But you are going to be drawn into it anyway. It's almost as addictive as the affair pictured in the novel. You will hope for Sarah, suffer with her, be angry at her. You'll be angry at her most of the time, to be honest; Sarah will drive you mad.
However, Louise O'Neill is trying to teach you something here: about unhealthy relationships, about privilege, and about feminism.
And about men who are dicks.
I hope (I really do) that the people who read this book will get it. It might take some patience and endurance, but it's worth it.
Find more of my books on Instagram
Almost Love is a tough book because Sarah is a tough main character. Don't be fooled into believing that this is a romance novel. It is not, even if the title suggests otherwise. It's a book about obsessive love, unrequited love, fading love.
You won't like Sarah, the main character. You're not supposed to. You're not going to find an exciting and fast-paced plot. This is not what this book is about. But you are going to be drawn into it anyway. It's almost as addictive as the affair pictured in the novel. You will hope for Sarah, suffer with her, be angry at her. You'll be angry at her most of the time, to be honest; Sarah will drive you mad.
However, Louise O'Neill is trying to teach you something here: about unhealthy relationships, about privilege, and about feminism.
And about men who are dicks.
I hope (I really do) that the people who read this book will get it. It might take some patience and endurance, but it's worth it.
Find more of my books on Instagram
March 6, 2019
This book broke me, quite literally. I have rarely had such a visceral reaction to a book as I had this time and I am quite unsure how to talk about it. For this very reason, I feel the need to start this review with a disclaimer: I saw so much of myself in the main character and her experiences and behaviours that I cannot be objective about the literary merit of this book but I can say with absolutely certainty that the emotional core of this book was intense.
Told in two timelines, then and now, this book traces Sarah's twenties. The past is told in first-person and tells of her increasingly destructive relationship to Matthew Brennan, a man many years her senior who treats her abysmally. The present is told in third person, Sarah is in a new relationship but still as ever self-hating and increasingly horrible to everybody around her. We closely follow Sarah, who is in no way an easy person to spend time with, and are always privy to her self-destructive thoughts and tendencies in a way that I found highly effective and extremely claustrophobic. Sarah is, for lack of a better term, a mess. For me the past narrative worked better; the intimate first person narration made it a difficult but rewarding experience; present day did not quite hold my interest at all times but managed to show just how broken Sarah is in a way that made my heart hurt.
Louise O'Neill shines an unflinching light on why a person might stay in a toxic situation way longer than they would have ever thought beforehand. Matthew is horribly disinterested in Sarah as a person except for brief interludes when he wants sex. The sex scenes are uncomfortable to no end, Matthew showing less than zero interest in making the experience pleasurable for Sarah who does not feel like she can tell him to stop. He belittles her and makes her feel bad for being the person she is. These scenes hit me incredibly hard: In my second and third year of uni, I dated this gorgeous, brilliant, funny Norwegian with the most beautiful accent when he spoke German with me - and who never let me forget that I am not the kind of person he wants to spend the rest of his life with (too feminist, too vegetarian, too not blond enough, too abrasive, too not feminine enough and so on) or maybe I never let him forget that he was not the person I wanted to grow old with (this might very well be true as well, relationships are rarely as one-sided as I would like to make this one seem). O'Neill captures the particular heartbreak that comes from a relationship like this incredibly well. While this made for a very difficult reading experience for me, it also impressed me to no end. I am so very glad to have read this.
I received an DRC of this book courtesy of NetGalley and Quercus Books in exchange for an honest review.
You can find this review and other thoughts on books on my blog.
Told in two timelines, then and now, this book traces Sarah's twenties. The past is told in first-person and tells of her increasingly destructive relationship to Matthew Brennan, a man many years her senior who treats her abysmally. The present is told in third person, Sarah is in a new relationship but still as ever self-hating and increasingly horrible to everybody around her. We closely follow Sarah, who is in no way an easy person to spend time with, and are always privy to her self-destructive thoughts and tendencies in a way that I found highly effective and extremely claustrophobic. Sarah is, for lack of a better term, a mess. For me the past narrative worked better; the intimate first person narration made it a difficult but rewarding experience; present day did not quite hold my interest at all times but managed to show just how broken Sarah is in a way that made my heart hurt.
Louise O'Neill shines an unflinching light on why a person might stay in a toxic situation way longer than they would have ever thought beforehand. Matthew is horribly disinterested in Sarah as a person except for brief interludes when he wants sex. The sex scenes are uncomfortable to no end, Matthew showing less than zero interest in making the experience pleasurable for Sarah who does not feel like she can tell him to stop. He belittles her and makes her feel bad for being the person she is. These scenes hit me incredibly hard: In my second and third year of uni, I dated this gorgeous, brilliant, funny Norwegian with the most beautiful accent when he spoke German with me - and who never let me forget that I am not the kind of person he wants to spend the rest of his life with (too feminist, too vegetarian, too not blond enough, too abrasive, too not feminine enough and so on) or maybe I never let him forget that he was not the person I wanted to grow old with (this might very well be true as well, relationships are rarely as one-sided as I would like to make this one seem). O'Neill captures the particular heartbreak that comes from a relationship like this incredibly well. While this made for a very difficult reading experience for me, it also impressed me to no end. I am so very glad to have read this.
I received an DRC of this book courtesy of NetGalley and Quercus Books in exchange for an honest review.
You can find this review and other thoughts on books on my blog.
March 21, 2018
This is such a difficult book to like. While there are truths about the role of women in society and in relationships, it's undermined by the fact that the protagonist is an arsehole. Sarah falls for an older man who treats her as nothing more than a means of sexual gratification and who everyone but her knows will never love her.. fair enough, we all make mistakes. But the author's examination of Sarah's obsessive 'love' of this man and the exploitative relationship she repeatedly returns to is negated by the way she treats every other person in her life like shit, drowning them with her selfish demands and an ever-more-tiring woe-is-me attitude that is hard to stomach. She's the kind of toxic you move right out of your life if you know what's good for you. If this is Sarah's redemption story, it misses the mark, the people around her are the ones needing to be saved.
I'm not sure what the overall point was; while the blurb alludes to her misunderstanding of what love really is, and the indicators are that we're supposed to feel sorry for her, she's just such a tool. Is he taking advantage of her? Definitely. But she never really loves him either, always describing his money and power, and the only time he is vulnerable, she's disgusted by him. Her obsession is one of ego and control, not love. She wants everything to be her way, otherwise it turns to lies, sex, and manipulation. Her desperate search for something, happiness maybe, destroys the people around her as she's destroying herself. Even though the other characters in the books are framed lightly by the author, their distress at her behaviour had far greater impact than anything she felt.
Sometimes I felt flashes of something in the writing, but it didn't come together well enough to make a real impact.
ARC via Netgalley
I'm not sure what the overall point was; while the blurb alludes to her misunderstanding of what love really is, and the indicators are that we're supposed to feel sorry for her, she's just such a tool. Is he taking advantage of her? Definitely. But she never really loves him either, always describing his money and power, and the only time he is vulnerable, she's disgusted by him. Her obsession is one of ego and control, not love. She wants everything to be her way, otherwise it turns to lies, sex, and manipulation. Her desperate search for something, happiness maybe, destroys the people around her as she's destroying herself. Even though the other characters in the books are framed lightly by the author, their distress at her behaviour had far greater impact than anything she felt.
Sometimes I felt flashes of something in the writing, but it didn't come together well enough to make a real impact.
ARC via Netgalley
February 27, 2019
When I read the synopsis for Almost Love, I mistook it for YA, partly because Asking for It (which I read last year) was, and also because I wrongly assumed it was about a teen in an abusive relationship with a much older man. But this was definitely an adult book, about a twenty-something schoolteacher (Sarah) in a psychologically damaging affair with the father of one of her students (Matthew). Not my usual read, so at first I wasn’t sure how I felt about reading this, but Almost Love surprised me in that it was just as brutally honest, timely, and emotional as Asking for It.
A quick, easy read, utilising one, third person POV, with the NOW and THEN format replacing chapters. Content wise, the abuse is psychological, but also physical in the form of rough/rape sex. I wouldn’t call it graphic, nor does it go into great detail, but it isn’t mild either, instead falls somewhere in between.
Sarah was a toxic person – a damaged soul long before she encountered Matthew, the majority of her issues stemming from childhood trauma. And, I would never make light of what she endured as a child (it was awful what she went through), but she was a grown woman in this book, who had a lot of good (and support) in her life – more than most, and she doesn’t appreciate any of it. Sarah is selfish, she’s whiny, and treats her family and friends like crap, expecting them to be at her beck and call, but doesn’t do the same for them in return. I’m guessing this was the point, that when a person feels this low, they cannot see what they have, and continuously make poor choices. And, I found it all really interesting, and I relished analysing Sarah, but if unlikeable protagonists, who never learn from their mistakes, depress you, then I’d steer clear of this one.
The other thing I found really intriguing was that in the present storyline, Sarah was psychologically abusive towards her live-in boyfriend, Oisin (not a spoiler – made clear from the onset), in fact in some ways she treated him worse than Matthew treated her. Also, I liked how this book showed how Sarah’s poisonous association with Matthew, impacted her friendships, and affected those closest to her. Yet more reasons why this was such a compelling novel.
This was my second read by Lousie O’Neill that I rated highly, so if she writes more in this vein, whether it’s adult or YA, I’ll be reading.
I’d like to thank Netgalley, Quercus Books, and Louise O’Neill for the e-ARC.
UK Publication Date: 7th March, 2019.
A quick, easy read, utilising one, third person POV, with the NOW and THEN format replacing chapters. Content wise, the abuse is psychological, but also physical in the form of rough/rape sex. I wouldn’t call it graphic, nor does it go into great detail, but it isn’t mild either, instead falls somewhere in between.
Sarah was a toxic person – a damaged soul long before she encountered Matthew, the majority of her issues stemming from childhood trauma. And, I would never make light of what she endured as a child (it was awful what she went through), but she was a grown woman in this book, who had a lot of good (and support) in her life – more than most, and she doesn’t appreciate any of it. Sarah is selfish, she’s whiny, and treats her family and friends like crap, expecting them to be at her beck and call, but doesn’t do the same for them in return. I’m guessing this was the point, that when a person feels this low, they cannot see what they have, and continuously make poor choices. And, I found it all really interesting, and I relished analysing Sarah, but if unlikeable protagonists, who never learn from their mistakes, depress you, then I’d steer clear of this one.
The other thing I found really intriguing was that in the present storyline, Sarah was psychologically abusive towards her live-in boyfriend, Oisin (not a spoiler – made clear from the onset), in fact in some ways she treated him worse than Matthew treated her. Also, I liked how this book showed how Sarah’s poisonous association with Matthew, impacted her friendships, and affected those closest to her. Yet more reasons why this was such a compelling novel.
This was my second read by Lousie O’Neill that I rated highly, so if she writes more in this vein, whether it’s adult or YA, I’ll be reading.
I’d like to thank Netgalley, Quercus Books, and Louise O’Neill for the e-ARC.
UK Publication Date: 7th March, 2019.
Read
June 3, 2018This is one of the best portrayals of self-destruction that I’ve read, showing how consuming it can be, how hazy its origins, how quickly you can become unrecognizable to others and to yourself. Sarah falls for an older man named Matthew (does she love him? It’s more significant that she wants HIM to love her), but he’s clear that he wants nothing from her but occasional sex on his own terms. She acquiesces again and again, even when the sex is painful, even when she feels herself slipping away from the people who care about her in her obsession to make this particular man care. O’Neill brilliantly shows how easy it is to make the wrong decision again and again (even knowing it’s the wrong decision in the moment), and to be casually cruel to the people who love you. Not a book for readers who have problems with unlikable characters, but I found it raw and frustrating and beautiful.
December 21, 2018
Ever wanted to keep going with a book but felt such intense discomfort at everything you were reading you couldn’t wait for it to end?
Such was my experience with this. I’ve never, in my life, wanted a book to end so fast because I couldn’t stand the protagonist (I HATED HER) and what I was reading.
That’s not to say my issues were technical, rather the subject matter.
I’m not personally triggered by books about abusive relationships but the way the mc accepted every degrading treatment from the guy, the manner in which she treated others around her, her obsession with appeasing him and submitting to his every sorted whim just so he’d (I really wanna keep this PG)... it felt like I was the one being constantly humiliated.
I felt so uncomfortable I kept wanting to bang her head through a wall and scream ‘WAKE UP, PLEASE! snap out of it!’.
Such was my experience with this. I’ve never, in my life, wanted a book to end so fast because I couldn’t stand the protagonist (I HATED HER) and what I was reading.
That’s not to say my issues were technical, rather the subject matter.
I’m not personally triggered by books about abusive relationships but the way the mc accepted every degrading treatment from the guy, the manner in which she treated others around her, her obsession with appeasing him and submitting to his every sorted whim just so he’d (I really wanna keep this PG)... it felt like I was the one being constantly humiliated.
I felt so uncomfortable I kept wanting to bang her head through a wall and scream ‘WAKE UP, PLEASE! snap out of it!’.
January 28, 2020
4 - 4.5 stars
Louise O'Neill is doing something incredible for women's fiction. Her subject matter is current, her setting is familiar, her female characters are real (not very likable but, wow, can we relate to them) and she is pushing boundaries when it comes to language. O'Neill gets it. She just gets it.
I am a big fan of O'Neill's work, I feel I need to start by saying. Only Ever Yours was masterfully evoked and was such a powerful depiction of a dystopian society where women are bred for male pleasure. Asking For It, too, was just excellent. O'Neill's handling of the theme of rape culture and the notion of consent was both daring and intelligent. And so relevant, especially with the trial of Paddy Jackson in the news currently. A brave writer, O'Neill puts her voice out there, is unapologetic in her role as a strong female figure in contemporary Ireland and, as a woman in my early 30s, I truly admire her for it. Last year, I went to hear her speak in the University of Limerick, where I work, and I thought she was just wonderful.
Almost Love is no different in its stark and revealing exploration of issues that face women. In this story we meet O'Neill's most detestable protagonist yet: Sarah Fitzpatrick is approaching her late-20s. Having graduated from art college and qualified as a teacher, she is living in Dublin with her boyfriend, Oisín. Oisín has a good job, they are living rent-free in a house belonging to his parents and her immediate support network constantly encourage her to get back to her art, including Oisín’s famous artist mother, who seems to genuinely care for Sarah. Despite her apparent good fortune, Sarah is deeply unhappy. Through sections titled 'Then' we go back in time to learn about the death of her mother at a young age and the subsequent breakdown in relationship with her father, who neglected his grieving daughter when he found himself unable to cope. We also gain insight into Sarah's relationship with a man 20 years her senior, a high-profile father of one of her pupils by the name of Matthew Brennan, a relationship that is so toxic we can't help but devour all description of it.
When we first meet Brennan, we are excited for an riveting and engrossing tale of boy meets girl (or, rather, girl meets manipulative older man). Soon, however, we realise that there is something darker here. Brennan uses Sarah for his sexual pleasure while remaining completely indifferent about what pleases her. He refuses to treat her with respect or with dignity and is completely ignorant of her feelings. And while that may make you hate him and pity her, it's not that simple thanks to O'Neill's searing precision in creating modern-day monsters who we love to hate. And Sarah is just that: she is utterly hateful. She looks down her nose at the small village she came from, as well as the people in it, including her old friends who she openly insults. She is angry at her father; angry at her friends for finding happiness; angry at her family and friends for encouraging her to paint; angry at herself for not painting; angry at her boyfriend for loving her and, yet, angry at him when her constant berating of him results in his retreat from her emotionally. And here is where you might find yourself retreating from this book. I admit, being inside the mind of such a cruel, self-obsessed protagonist can be tough; I found it exhausting and draining at times. But therein lies the spark and the beauty of O'Neill's writing. She is fearless in her depiction of characters who we as readers will hate. She challenges us to see things from their perspectives, to read their ugly thoughts, and asks us if they are deserving of the treatment they receive.
As you read Almost Love, you will find yourself shouting at Sarah in your head to leave Brennan. His treatment of her is despicable, as he plays on her neediness to fulfill his own sexual and emotional comforts. When we see the texts she sends him we cringe; when we read about their sexual interactions where he has his needs met and she is treated as nothing but a physical body, we shudder; when we read page after page of her obsessing about Brennan, exhausting her friends with constant self-mutilating thoughts about how she could make him love her, we get frustrated. And when we see her abuse her relationships and treat her family and friends dismally, we get angry.
Again, what O'Neill does here is genius. It would be so easy to write a gentle, suffering protagonist who we cry for and hope she finds happiness. Then we would be told who we should root for an who we should despise. Good cop, bad cop, if you will. But with Almost Love our normal comfort of sympathising with our protagonist is challenged.
One thing that will no doubt encourage endless discussion between readers is Brennan's treatment of Sarah and Sarah's subsequent treatment of herself. There is a grey area here that is so well presented by O'Neill that it will perplex and divide audiences. Does Brennan treat Sarah so badly because he is just a complete asshole? Or does he treat her so badly because Sarah allows herself to be treated this way? Sarah is a complex character in that she doesn't seem to able to love herself and refuses to allow other people to love her, so one could argue that she is responsible for the treatment she receives, that she perpetuates it almost. What your feelings on this are, I will leave you to decide.
One thing is for sure though: this story is relatable. Whether it is watching the phone until a text comes through from a man or agonising over how we could have done things differently to change the outcome of a relationship, there is a little Sarah in all of us.
While the toxic and obsessive love affair takes centre stage, at its heart Almost Love is a deep, explorative psychological portrait of a grieving young woman. It is razor sharp, brave and so utterly important. Highly recommended. And going straight onto my Top Reads of 2018 shelf.
Louise O'Neill is doing something incredible for women's fiction. Her subject matter is current, her setting is familiar, her female characters are real (not very likable but, wow, can we relate to them) and she is pushing boundaries when it comes to language. O'Neill gets it. She just gets it.
I am a big fan of O'Neill's work, I feel I need to start by saying. Only Ever Yours was masterfully evoked and was such a powerful depiction of a dystopian society where women are bred for male pleasure. Asking For It, too, was just excellent. O'Neill's handling of the theme of rape culture and the notion of consent was both daring and intelligent. And so relevant, especially with the trial of Paddy Jackson in the news currently. A brave writer, O'Neill puts her voice out there, is unapologetic in her role as a strong female figure in contemporary Ireland and, as a woman in my early 30s, I truly admire her for it. Last year, I went to hear her speak in the University of Limerick, where I work, and I thought she was just wonderful.
Almost Love is no different in its stark and revealing exploration of issues that face women. In this story we meet O'Neill's most detestable protagonist yet: Sarah Fitzpatrick is approaching her late-20s. Having graduated from art college and qualified as a teacher, she is living in Dublin with her boyfriend, Oisín. Oisín has a good job, they are living rent-free in a house belonging to his parents and her immediate support network constantly encourage her to get back to her art, including Oisín’s famous artist mother, who seems to genuinely care for Sarah. Despite her apparent good fortune, Sarah is deeply unhappy. Through sections titled 'Then' we go back in time to learn about the death of her mother at a young age and the subsequent breakdown in relationship with her father, who neglected his grieving daughter when he found himself unable to cope. We also gain insight into Sarah's relationship with a man 20 years her senior, a high-profile father of one of her pupils by the name of Matthew Brennan, a relationship that is so toxic we can't help but devour all description of it.
When we first meet Brennan, we are excited for an riveting and engrossing tale of boy meets girl (or, rather, girl meets manipulative older man). Soon, however, we realise that there is something darker here. Brennan uses Sarah for his sexual pleasure while remaining completely indifferent about what pleases her. He refuses to treat her with respect or with dignity and is completely ignorant of her feelings. And while that may make you hate him and pity her, it's not that simple thanks to O'Neill's searing precision in creating modern-day monsters who we love to hate. And Sarah is just that: she is utterly hateful. She looks down her nose at the small village she came from, as well as the people in it, including her old friends who she openly insults. She is angry at her father; angry at her friends for finding happiness; angry at her family and friends for encouraging her to paint; angry at herself for not painting; angry at her boyfriend for loving her and, yet, angry at him when her constant berating of him results in his retreat from her emotionally. And here is where you might find yourself retreating from this book. I admit, being inside the mind of such a cruel, self-obsessed protagonist can be tough; I found it exhausting and draining at times. But therein lies the spark and the beauty of O'Neill's writing. She is fearless in her depiction of characters who we as readers will hate. She challenges us to see things from their perspectives, to read their ugly thoughts, and asks us if they are deserving of the treatment they receive.
As you read Almost Love, you will find yourself shouting at Sarah in your head to leave Brennan. His treatment of her is despicable, as he plays on her neediness to fulfill his own sexual and emotional comforts. When we see the texts she sends him we cringe; when we read about their sexual interactions where he has his needs met and she is treated as nothing but a physical body, we shudder; when we read page after page of her obsessing about Brennan, exhausting her friends with constant self-mutilating thoughts about how she could make him love her, we get frustrated. And when we see her abuse her relationships and treat her family and friends dismally, we get angry.
Again, what O'Neill does here is genius. It would be so easy to write a gentle, suffering protagonist who we cry for and hope she finds happiness. Then we would be told who we should root for an who we should despise. Good cop, bad cop, if you will. But with Almost Love our normal comfort of sympathising with our protagonist is challenged.
One thing that will no doubt encourage endless discussion between readers is Brennan's treatment of Sarah and Sarah's subsequent treatment of herself. There is a grey area here that is so well presented by O'Neill that it will perplex and divide audiences. Does Brennan treat Sarah so badly because he is just a complete asshole? Or does he treat her so badly because Sarah allows herself to be treated this way? Sarah is a complex character in that she doesn't seem to able to love herself and refuses to allow other people to love her, so one could argue that she is responsible for the treatment she receives, that she perpetuates it almost. What your feelings on this are, I will leave you to decide.
One thing is for sure though: this story is relatable. Whether it is watching the phone until a text comes through from a man or agonising over how we could have done things differently to change the outcome of a relationship, there is a little Sarah in all of us.
While the toxic and obsessive love affair takes centre stage, at its heart Almost Love is a deep, explorative psychological portrait of a grieving young woman. It is razor sharp, brave and so utterly important. Highly recommended. And going straight onto my Top Reads of 2018 shelf.
May 25, 2018
Almost Love follows Sarah, an aspiring artist who's put her ambitions aside to become an art teacher at a private school, and it chronicles her highly dysfunctional relationship with one of her students' fathers.
Asking For It is one of the best books I've read so far this year, so Almost Love had a lot to live up to. I actually expected to like it even more than Asking For It, as I prefer adult to YA for the most part. So I was surprised when it fell a bit short of Asking For It for me, but ultimately I did find it to be every bit as engrossing and incisive as I know Louise O'Neill is capable of.
The striking thing about O'Neill's writing is the way she's able to elucidate these hard-hitting realities that are so common to the female experience, but so often underrepresented. The reason Sarah stays with Matthew in this book is one that I see so little in fiction and so much in real life. The reader has certain expectations from the beginning: this relationship is clearly terrible, so there must be a concrete reason that Sarah is putting herself through this. The sex must be amazing (it isn't), or Sarah gets something in return - money or social status (she doesn't), or it's clear that Sarah and Matthew love each other and their love is doomed by factors outside their control (this is not the case). Sarah stays with Matthew because his wanting her validates her sense of self-worth. Louise O'Neill confronts head-on the fact that women are socialized to believe that our bodies are not for our own pleasure; our own feelings are secondary; maintaining the relationship, however terrible, at all costs should be our main objective.
As with Asking For It, the real triumph of Almost Love is the protagonist's unlikability. Sarah is awful, and O'Neill doesn't skirt around that. We aren't supposed to 'like' Sarah, we aren't supposed to want to take her out to dinner or bond with her. The fact that Sarah is an atrocious friend is pretty clearly established. What works about it is how O'Neill, again, is challenging this conception that a woman's worth is tied up in her likability, in how she's perceived by others. Yes, Sarah creates a lot of her own misfortunes here, but this situation is so intrinsically tied with how women are socialized from an early age, so it's important to look at the bigger picture here while considering Sarah's own situation. Maybe Sarah doesn't deserve the world, but she does deserve common human decency in the way she's treated by others. It's not a particularly earth-shattering concept, but it's one that O'Neill gets to the heart of deftly.
Where it fell a bit short for me was in being very dialogue-heavy, it did a lot of telling rather than showing. I thought the prose in Asking For It was quite mature for YA, but it was so startlingly similar in Almost Love that it almost suffered for that comparison I had in my head - that this worked for a YA novel, and I was expecting something a bit more... elevated here? Which is partially my own personal hangup with genre expectations that I'm trying to break away from, but anyway. This didn't blow me away and shatter my soul the way Asking For It did, but it's still an important and engaging book that I didn't want to put down for a second.
Asking For It is one of the best books I've read so far this year, so Almost Love had a lot to live up to. I actually expected to like it even more than Asking For It, as I prefer adult to YA for the most part. So I was surprised when it fell a bit short of Asking For It for me, but ultimately I did find it to be every bit as engrossing and incisive as I know Louise O'Neill is capable of.
The striking thing about O'Neill's writing is the way she's able to elucidate these hard-hitting realities that are so common to the female experience, but so often underrepresented. The reason Sarah stays with Matthew in this book is one that I see so little in fiction and so much in real life. The reader has certain expectations from the beginning: this relationship is clearly terrible, so there must be a concrete reason that Sarah is putting herself through this. The sex must be amazing (it isn't), or Sarah gets something in return - money or social status (she doesn't), or it's clear that Sarah and Matthew love each other and their love is doomed by factors outside their control (this is not the case). Sarah stays with Matthew because his wanting her validates her sense of self-worth. Louise O'Neill confronts head-on the fact that women are socialized to believe that our bodies are not for our own pleasure; our own feelings are secondary; maintaining the relationship, however terrible, at all costs should be our main objective.
As with Asking For It, the real triumph of Almost Love is the protagonist's unlikability. Sarah is awful, and O'Neill doesn't skirt around that. We aren't supposed to 'like' Sarah, we aren't supposed to want to take her out to dinner or bond with her. The fact that Sarah is an atrocious friend is pretty clearly established. What works about it is how O'Neill, again, is challenging this conception that a woman's worth is tied up in her likability, in how she's perceived by others. Yes, Sarah creates a lot of her own misfortunes here, but this situation is so intrinsically tied with how women are socialized from an early age, so it's important to look at the bigger picture here while considering Sarah's own situation. Maybe Sarah doesn't deserve the world, but she does deserve common human decency in the way she's treated by others. It's not a particularly earth-shattering concept, but it's one that O'Neill gets to the heart of deftly.
Where it fell a bit short for me was in being very dialogue-heavy, it did a lot of telling rather than showing. I thought the prose in Asking For It was quite mature for YA, but it was so startlingly similar in Almost Love that it almost suffered for that comparison I had in my head - that this worked for a YA novel, and I was expecting something a bit more... elevated here? Which is partially my own personal hangup with genre expectations that I'm trying to break away from, but anyway. This didn't blow me away and shatter my soul the way Asking For It did, but it's still an important and engaging book that I didn't want to put down for a second.
July 16, 2018
*https://mrsbbookreviews.wordpress.com
While searching for a book to read for one of the challenges I am completing this year, the A-Z author challenge, directed me to a personal purchase and resident on my TBR shelf, Almost Love by Louise O’Neill. I haven’t read any previous material written by this Irish author, but I have seen plenty of favourable book buzz on Asking For It, O’Neill’s previous novel. Almost Love unravels in a THEN and NOW story composition. It gradually reveals the state of affairs of a young teacher and aspiring artist, Sarah. Embarking on a clandestine love affair with a destructive and selfish man twenty years her senior has far reaching implications for young Sarah. Now two years on from the affair, we glean a lot about how this relationship has filtered into Sarah’s career, aspirations, friendships, family relationships and current love life. Almost Love is emotional, raw, heartbreaking, agonising, depressing, frustrating and thought provoking. It is an introspective study of the sexes, how we respond to an obsessive form of love and a relationship that everyone can see is doomed from the start. Although it gave plenty of food for thought, the poor behaviour of the lead protagonists (immature and degrading), the unappealing nature of the characters themselves, the bleak subject matter and a messy plot, which intersperses dialogue with messages between Matthew, the object of Sarah’s infatuation and Sarah herself, didn’t quite capture me.
While searching for a book to read for one of the challenges I am completing this year, the A-Z author challenge, directed me to a personal purchase and resident on my TBR shelf, Almost Love by Louise O’Neill. I haven’t read any previous material written by this Irish author, but I have seen plenty of favourable book buzz on Asking For It, O’Neill’s previous novel. Almost Love unravels in a THEN and NOW story composition. It gradually reveals the state of affairs of a young teacher and aspiring artist, Sarah. Embarking on a clandestine love affair with a destructive and selfish man twenty years her senior has far reaching implications for young Sarah. Now two years on from the affair, we glean a lot about how this relationship has filtered into Sarah’s career, aspirations, friendships, family relationships and current love life. Almost Love is emotional, raw, heartbreaking, agonising, depressing, frustrating and thought provoking. It is an introspective study of the sexes, how we respond to an obsessive form of love and a relationship that everyone can see is doomed from the start. Although it gave plenty of food for thought, the poor behaviour of the lead protagonists (immature and degrading), the unappealing nature of the characters themselves, the bleak subject matter and a messy plot, which intersperses dialogue with messages between Matthew, the object of Sarah’s infatuation and Sarah herself, didn’t quite capture me.
March 3, 2022
I do like an unlikeable character who makes a mess of her life, in the sense that I want to understand her. In Almost Love, however, I could never fully get a grip on Sarah and comprehend why exactly she did what she did and felt what she felt. The trajectories of her relationships were a mystery to me. Some major pieces of character development and motivations were missing here for sure. Definitely one of the weaker books written by O'Neill, although still quite readable.
March 27, 2018
I squirmed my way uncomfortably through this book. It was too authentic and held a mirror up to parts of my life that I’d rather not remember. Anyone who has ever held on too long to a dead in the water and/or toxic relationship will know what I mean.
I hated the main character, mostly because her pain flowed like toxins in to all her relationships. But I totally got her.
Big thumbs up, but don’t go in expecting a romance to swoon over. Instead get prepped for raw, real and gritty. And very addictive.
I hated the main character, mostly because her pain flowed like toxins in to all her relationships. But I totally got her.
Big thumbs up, but don’t go in expecting a romance to swoon over. Instead get prepped for raw, real and gritty. And very addictive.
March 24, 2019
“Almost Love” was first published in the spring of 2018 and having skimmed through the first couple of “Now” & “Then” chapters while browsing for my next read in a bookshop, I’d decided then and there that this book wasn’t for me. What has happened since? I mostly ‘blame’ it on Sally Rooney and Eimear McBride for teaching me that a story is not always about likeable protagonists, because people can sometimes be self-obsessed, self-destructive, and their motivations not always rational.
I am not going into how destructive the relationship between Sarah Fitzpatrick and the older Matthew Brennan becomes and why she behaves the way she does: someone with a psychology background could have a field day only with the first ten or so pages. My takeaway from this is that another person and their approval of you shouldn’t be your source of happiness.
Louise O'Neill’s first move into adult fiction touches on a subject matter that women’s contemporary narratives rarely (or rather, guardedly) approach: sexual dysfunction and power dynamics in toxic relationships and why – even though there are not set out to win the reader’s sympathy - these stories deserve to be told.
I’m so glad I gave this one another shot!
*Thanks to NetGalley & Quercus Books for the opportunity to read a digital ARC in exchange for an honest review.*
I am not going into how destructive the relationship between Sarah Fitzpatrick and the older Matthew Brennan becomes and why she behaves the way she does: someone with a psychology background could have a field day only with the first ten or so pages. My takeaway from this is that another person and their approval of you shouldn’t be your source of happiness.
Louise O'Neill’s first move into adult fiction touches on a subject matter that women’s contemporary narratives rarely (or rather, guardedly) approach: sexual dysfunction and power dynamics in toxic relationships and why – even though there are not set out to win the reader’s sympathy - these stories deserve to be told.
I’m so glad I gave this one another shot!
“Did all women take half-truths and implied promises and side glances and smiles and weave them together to create a narrative, the way she had done? Did those women write their own bedtime stories too, recite them out loud for comfort? Or did they just move on, relegating their unpleasant experiences to the footnotes in their romantic history?”
*Thanks to NetGalley & Quercus Books for the opportunity to read a digital ARC in exchange for an honest review.*
March 16, 2018
4.5 stars
When Sarah is 24 years old, she meets a man who is almost 20 years her senior but it doesn't stop her from falling for him - despite the way he treats her. As Sarah falls deeper into the toxic relationship, she begins to lose control over other parts of her life.
This was an addicting read that I couldn't put it down, I read it in day - I absolutely flew through it. Just like her other books, Louise O'Neill has showed a power to see in the heart of the flawed human woman, and rip those feelings, thoughts, unsavoury so they be and displayed on a page for everyone to see, and relate to. She is definitely the queen of unlikeable characters as well - much like Emma from Asking For It, I found Sarah to be a really annoying character just because of her selfish actions most of the time (which she is called out for again, and again by friends). The way she treats her friends, and her dad, and then her boyfriend is so horrible I constantly felt like screaming at her to 'wake up' and see what she has before it's too late.
Sarah's relationship with Matthew was just so interesting and one that I could relate to and not relate to at the same time. I've never had a relationship with a much older man, or a guy that has tried to exact such power over me like Matthew but I, like Sarah and many women before, have been in relationships where I've started feeling like only part of myself because I've moulded myself into him and been the one that is guilty of just loving too much. Louise O'Neill hit the nail on the head with this one, and I just loved the raw, grittiness of it.
When Sarah is 24 years old, she meets a man who is almost 20 years her senior but it doesn't stop her from falling for him - despite the way he treats her. As Sarah falls deeper into the toxic relationship, she begins to lose control over other parts of her life.
This was an addicting read that I couldn't put it down, I read it in day - I absolutely flew through it. Just like her other books, Louise O'Neill has showed a power to see in the heart of the flawed human woman, and rip those feelings, thoughts, unsavoury so they be and displayed on a page for everyone to see, and relate to. She is definitely the queen of unlikeable characters as well - much like Emma from Asking For It, I found Sarah to be a really annoying character just because of her selfish actions most of the time (which she is called out for again, and again by friends). The way she treats her friends, and her dad, and then her boyfriend is so horrible I constantly felt like screaming at her to 'wake up' and see what she has before it's too late.
Sarah's relationship with Matthew was just so interesting and one that I could relate to and not relate to at the same time. I've never had a relationship with a much older man, or a guy that has tried to exact such power over me like Matthew but I, like Sarah and many women before, have been in relationships where I've started feeling like only part of myself because I've moulded myself into him and been the one that is guilty of just loving too much. Louise O'Neill hit the nail on the head with this one, and I just loved the raw, grittiness of it.
March 13, 2018
Very mixed feelings on this one.
Louise is so GREAT at putting you in the main character's shoes and helping you understand their mindset and thought process. Super believable. Brill. BRAVO LOUISE
However, the degree of horridness and nastiness that these characters displayed was OVERWHELMING. For me, at least. I know there was a point to this, but I struggle so much to get past it when I literally want to push my hands through the pages and point my finger at the main character and shout 'STOP BEING SO HORRIBLE, YOU HORRIBLE HORRIBLE GIRL'
I enjoyed the issues discussed very much, and sympathised with Sarah massively. But 99% of her behaviour despite the events in this book were absolutely inexcusable in my (maybe harsh) opinion. I know it means to show how desperate she is I KNOW but my GOD. THIS WOMAN. SHE IS UNBEARABLE
Would recommend. Simply a lower rating as the characters hindered my enjoyment, really. Sorry for the uncontrollable caps use.
Louise is so GREAT at putting you in the main character's shoes and helping you understand their mindset and thought process. Super believable. Brill. BRAVO LOUISE
However, the degree of horridness and nastiness that these characters displayed was OVERWHELMING. For me, at least. I know there was a point to this, but I struggle so much to get past it when I literally want to push my hands through the pages and point my finger at the main character and shout 'STOP BEING SO HORRIBLE, YOU HORRIBLE HORRIBLE GIRL'
I enjoyed the issues discussed very much, and sympathised with Sarah massively. But 99% of her behaviour despite the events in this book were absolutely inexcusable in my (maybe harsh) opinion. I know it means to show how desperate she is I KNOW but my GOD. THIS WOMAN. SHE IS UNBEARABLE
Would recommend. Simply a lower rating as the characters hindered my enjoyment, really. Sorry for the uncontrollable caps use.
January 25, 2018
Well, that was disappointing from the usually wondrous O'Neill - partly because the book itself doesn't bear much relation to the publisher blurb. Yes, there is what we might vaguely call an 'affair', though it's really just a series of hook-ups between Matthew, a smug, super-rich, older man and the protagonist, Sarah.
Both characters are unpleasant: Matthew is pretty obnoxious, Sarah is a narcissist who is selfish and self-deluding. She's ashamed of her father, mean to her (super-rich) boyfriend, has no time for her friends, and resents the fact that other people are successful where she has failed.
It's hard to see what O'Neill's point is: at various stages this feels like a girl-victim story, then a story about the hollowness of material wealth, but neither quite come to fruition: Sarah is needy and deluded, Matthew is careless and exploitative - it's hard to feel much for either of them. As much as Sarah tells herself stories, even she admits that she knows nothing about Matthew and certainly isn't in love with him.
There's a certain rawness in the writing but this feels like it's floundering around looking for the story. Switching between 'then' and 'now' and having a long parade of walk-on characters just clutters things further. O'Neill has proved herself a bold, courageous and intelligent writer in the past: hopefully her next book will be back to her storytelling best.
Both characters are unpleasant: Matthew is pretty obnoxious, Sarah is a narcissist who is selfish and self-deluding. She's ashamed of her father, mean to her (super-rich) boyfriend, has no time for her friends, and resents the fact that other people are successful where she has failed.
It's hard to see what O'Neill's point is: at various stages this feels like a girl-victim story, then a story about the hollowness of material wealth, but neither quite come to fruition: Sarah is needy and deluded, Matthew is careless and exploitative - it's hard to feel much for either of them. As much as Sarah tells herself stories, even she admits that she knows nothing about Matthew and certainly isn't in love with him.
There's a certain rawness in the writing but this feels like it's floundering around looking for the story. Switching between 'then' and 'now' and having a long parade of walk-on characters just clutters things further. O'Neill has proved herself a bold, courageous and intelligent writer in the past: hopefully her next book will be back to her storytelling best.
June 15, 2020
This book was a mess, to the point of feeling more like a draft than a real book. The characters were awful but only because most human beings are. I am okay with reading about not-perfect people but I wanted some kind of change to happen with them.
I could relate to Sarah when she was describing her relationship with Matthew - sometimes women endure so much shit just because they want to stay in a relationship, because they think they can save a men.
Although I didn't like this book I liked how she decided to portray the main relationship. The way she decided to convey this message, thought, just didn't work for me.
I could relate to Sarah when she was describing her relationship with Matthew - sometimes women endure so much shit just because they want to stay in a relationship, because they think they can save a men.
Although I didn't like this book I liked how she decided to portray the main relationship. The way she decided to convey this message, thought, just didn't work for me.
September 20, 2018
4.5 stars
Phenomenal novel. Hard to read, not because of its density but because the characters are so fiercely unlikeable that at times I didn't want to continue. Yet, this story is beyond compelling and I just had to keep reading. An extremely important book that is well-written and I would recommend to anyone.
Trigger warning for abuse.
Phenomenal novel. Hard to read, not because of its density but because the characters are so fiercely unlikeable that at times I didn't want to continue. Yet, this story is beyond compelling and I just had to keep reading. An extremely important book that is well-written and I would recommend to anyone.
Trigger warning for abuse.
Want to read
September 10, 2017I eagerly await anything and everything this author writes.
February 4, 2018
Not for me. I was bored throughout and didn't understand the point of the story. The main character was vapid and dull.
June 26, 2018
I've previously read the YA books that this author has written, and really enjoyed them, so when I heard that she was releasing an Adult novel I was pretty excited. Louise O'Neill is nothing if not brave, she is willing to go the distance with research and dive headlong into a tricky topic, such as toxic relationships, rape and more. She's unafraid to tackle these topics with her characters, and I believe she has pure skill for creating dislikable but sympathy-worthy characters who you want to hate, but who you can't help but worry for.
This story follows Sarah, an aspiring artist-turned-teacher as she attempts to build a relationship with the much older Matthew, father of one of the children she teaches. Their relationship begins by being about sex, and the story is the same throughout the entire time that they are together. Sarah keeps on making excuses for Matthew, and Matthew keeps on calling on her and giving her hope that maybe there's more.
What I found interesting and tragic all at once here is the fact that this 'relationship' felt realistic. I could genuinely see some of these traits in people I've known, and it's sad to think that just some of these excuses can lead to a mountain of lies pretty fast. Sarah convinces herself that there's a lot more good than we as the reader can see, and she manages to alienate and upset her family and friends with her lies and self-deception.
The bad thing about this book is that to me it felt ikky. This man who can so very easily use a woman, it's gross, nasty and not someone I wanted to actively spend much time thinking about. He's not someone I would ever want to be around, and yet Sarah is clinging desperately to him at the detriment of her own life.
Overall, this was mixed, I read it super quick on audio, and it was a good read in that it was captivating and it kept me interested, but I really wanted more from Sarah and hoped she would overcome the pressure she put on herself and learn from her past mistakes. Like many toxic cycles Sarah gets stuck time and time again, and as a reader that was frustrating, no doubt in real life as family/friends it would be crushing...
This book has the reality of the real world, and the drama of a good book, but the frustration is real too, therefore I gave it a 3*s overall, but it's for sure made me think!!
This story follows Sarah, an aspiring artist-turned-teacher as she attempts to build a relationship with the much older Matthew, father of one of the children she teaches. Their relationship begins by being about sex, and the story is the same throughout the entire time that they are together. Sarah keeps on making excuses for Matthew, and Matthew keeps on calling on her and giving her hope that maybe there's more.
What I found interesting and tragic all at once here is the fact that this 'relationship' felt realistic. I could genuinely see some of these traits in people I've known, and it's sad to think that just some of these excuses can lead to a mountain of lies pretty fast. Sarah convinces herself that there's a lot more good than we as the reader can see, and she manages to alienate and upset her family and friends with her lies and self-deception.
The bad thing about this book is that to me it felt ikky. This man who can so very easily use a woman, it's gross, nasty and not someone I wanted to actively spend much time thinking about. He's not someone I would ever want to be around, and yet Sarah is clinging desperately to him at the detriment of her own life.
Overall, this was mixed, I read it super quick on audio, and it was a good read in that it was captivating and it kept me interested, but I really wanted more from Sarah and hoped she would overcome the pressure she put on herself and learn from her past mistakes. Like many toxic cycles Sarah gets stuck time and time again, and as a reader that was frustrating, no doubt in real life as family/friends it would be crushing...
This book has the reality of the real world, and the drama of a good book, but the frustration is real too, therefore I gave it a 3*s overall, but it's for sure made me think!!
March 3, 2018
Oh my goodness, this book is good. The scariest thing about it all is how much I can relate to the main character Sarah; how much she resonates with me.
It makes me think about a past relationship and how terrifying it is to see it again through a fiction, a book; how terrifying is to see how commonly we all make this type of mistake, we all have to have our heart broken this way in order to learn and move on to better things that we deserve in our life.
This book is about a story about Sarah, a struggling artist and a teacher and her story of falling in love with Matthew when she was 24 years old. Matthew was 20 years older than her. He was very clear of what he wanted from the beginning, sex and nothing more. Sarah was ok with it but then she wanted more. The more became an obsession. The story switches between the past and present. The present is Sarah, post Matthew and in a relative new relationship; and the past was her affair with Matthew, and how this past affair still haunts Sarah to this day and gradually ruins every relationship she has and how she ultimately needs to step back and looks at herself and convince herself that she is good enough and deserves better things.
The whole time I was reading this book, it felt so agonising. It is so depressing in the sense that I can see what she is doing wrong and that she is degrading herself to be with someone who never cares about her at all, that she has put him above everyone else. It feels so scary how much I can relate to Sarah, the waiting for the text messages, the phone calls; the world is going to end if he doesn’t text you back after your 10th message; the begging; the self-loathing; the self-doubt; the bitterness towards other people who really care about you; the ungratefulness of everything. Louise has captured them so perfectly and fiercely in Almost Love.
Louise has also written one of the most agonising and frustrating characters of all time! She captured the sensitive, needy, insecure, bitter, jealous, longing, lonely Sarah so well. I want to shake her and scream to her face “wake up”, I want to hug her and tell her “I understand you and it will all be ok”. It really tears me apart to see her hurting like this but what’s worse is to see her in this way from her own doing.
I think most of us have had this type of relationship that is toxic and obsessive and unhealthy. I would recommend you all to read this book to see it from the outside that it is ok to have made mistakes like this, it is ok to feel hurt. The important thing is to pick yourself up and know that you deserve better, and the only way to deserve better is to truly believe that you are enough, you, as your own self, are good enough.
I do want Louise to write a sequel to this! I want more! I want to see how Sarah’s story ends. I want her to find her happy ending the way she deserves!
It makes me think about a past relationship and how terrifying it is to see it again through a fiction, a book; how terrifying is to see how commonly we all make this type of mistake, we all have to have our heart broken this way in order to learn and move on to better things that we deserve in our life.
This book is about a story about Sarah, a struggling artist and a teacher and her story of falling in love with Matthew when she was 24 years old. Matthew was 20 years older than her. He was very clear of what he wanted from the beginning, sex and nothing more. Sarah was ok with it but then she wanted more. The more became an obsession. The story switches between the past and present. The present is Sarah, post Matthew and in a relative new relationship; and the past was her affair with Matthew, and how this past affair still haunts Sarah to this day and gradually ruins every relationship she has and how she ultimately needs to step back and looks at herself and convince herself that she is good enough and deserves better things.
The whole time I was reading this book, it felt so agonising. It is so depressing in the sense that I can see what she is doing wrong and that she is degrading herself to be with someone who never cares about her at all, that she has put him above everyone else. It feels so scary how much I can relate to Sarah, the waiting for the text messages, the phone calls; the world is going to end if he doesn’t text you back after your 10th message; the begging; the self-loathing; the self-doubt; the bitterness towards other people who really care about you; the ungratefulness of everything. Louise has captured them so perfectly and fiercely in Almost Love.
Louise has also written one of the most agonising and frustrating characters of all time! She captured the sensitive, needy, insecure, bitter, jealous, longing, lonely Sarah so well. I want to shake her and scream to her face “wake up”, I want to hug her and tell her “I understand you and it will all be ok”. It really tears me apart to see her hurting like this but what’s worse is to see her in this way from her own doing.
I think most of us have had this type of relationship that is toxic and obsessive and unhealthy. I would recommend you all to read this book to see it from the outside that it is ok to have made mistakes like this, it is ok to feel hurt. The important thing is to pick yourself up and know that you deserve better, and the only way to deserve better is to truly believe that you are enough, you, as your own self, are good enough.
I do want Louise to write a sequel to this! I want more! I want to see how Sarah’s story ends. I want her to find her happy ending the way she deserves!
March 4, 2018
I recall to this day a very involved debate I had with someone about Elena Ferrante's Neopolitian quartet. This person loved them and I hated them. It transpired that my reason for hating them was rooted very much in my need, as a person and from life experience, to have redemption in my fiction. The books that shaped my childhood were all of the sort that 'have a moral in 'em', like Little Women and Anne of Green Gables and Narnia, so I developed an expectation that the good would end happily and the bad unhappily, unless they learned an Important Lesson, in which case they too could aim for a HEA.
So the biggest issue I have with this book is entirely personal and nothing, really, to do with the book's actual merits. While I believe that Sarah has a redemptive arc - that in fact the closing scene is the beginning of it - all the book deals with is the first act of A Really Shitty Person Without Redemptive Value's Shitty Life Story. The book's narrative high points are also the points at which Sarah is her most intolerable -
So the biggest issue I have with this book is entirely personal and nothing, really, to do with the book's actual merits. While I believe that Sarah has a redemptive arc - that in fact the closing scene is the beginning of it - all the book deals with is the first act of A Really Shitty Person Without Redemptive Value's Shitty Life Story. The book's narrative high points are also the points at which Sarah is her most intolerable -
March 3, 2018
Louise O'Neill truly never fails to amaze me.
I must admit that,for once,I was little worried going into one of her books simply because the core theme of a young woman infatuated with an older man who couldn't really give less of a toss about her could go wrong very easily.That being said,I think Louise did a spectacular job walking that very fine line.
There were things that I expected in this book and that played a large part in my high expectations for the book, such as Louise's engaging as well as poignant writing style, which not only met my expectations,but managed to exceed them. Her use of different persons in the narrative in order to symbolise Sarah's distancing of her own narrative were a punch to the heart in the best way possible. I also thought that the way she made Sarah relatable, yet pretty unlikable, were the most Louise-like choice and,as always,added so much depth to the story and so much authenticity to Sarah's character. She was a complex,raw,flawed mess of a human who was sometimes aware of her own shortcomings and who sometimes went off track,overwhelmed by the pressure of her circumstances,yet in the end she tried her best. Sarah is very much the nasty woman that we,as a society,need to get accustomed as well as used to. Her secondary characters are also great and complex and feel like proper humans that you could come across and the dynamics between them all feel just as realistic. That being said, Matthew can choke, Fionn is the newfound love of my life and Oonagh is a queen that can do no wrong. That is all. Sarah's friends from back home and the way they all interact do feel like real ways people who've known each other act around one another once they grow so differently.
The way Almost Love explores the theme of toxic infatuation is impressive to say the least. The way that certain 'relationship' starts and the way it develops and ends are so far from one another and you're taken by surprise by the whole ride that it is as a reader, you can't help but hold your breath a little bit for Sarah knowing where it is all headed. You also have the added nuance of the other hints of romance we see from Sarah's life. You can't help but root for her but live under the impeding failure of all those could-be love stories.
What I didn't quite expect,however,was the added subplot of art. I absolutely loved every little paragraph and sentence that we got that dealt with that theme and would have read another 200 pages of the book were they to deal with that,but alas,I did get just enough to keep me happy and it shall suffice.Not only was the theme of art such a great addition to the general plot as far as I am concerned,but the artistic persona added such an intricate layer to Sarah's character and her relation with art felt so tightly correlated to her relation with herself and those around her.
I also appreciated the feminism undertones sprinkled every now and again which,also,felt very Louise-esque.
Overall,I think I could confidently say that this is the raw,messy,real novel one would expect from Louise and she further solidifies herself as one of Ireland's most promising literary voices.I truly could spend hours talking about all the recurring elements and symbols in this book,as well as other general thoughts.If I had a hat on,I would take it off,but I do not,so it shall suffice to say I take my proverbial hat off and bow.
I must admit that,for once,I was little worried going into one of her books simply because the core theme of a young woman infatuated with an older man who couldn't really give less of a toss about her could go wrong very easily.That being said,I think Louise did a spectacular job walking that very fine line.
There were things that I expected in this book and that played a large part in my high expectations for the book, such as Louise's engaging as well as poignant writing style, which not only met my expectations,but managed to exceed them. Her use of different persons in the narrative in order to symbolise Sarah's distancing of her own narrative were a punch to the heart in the best way possible. I also thought that the way she made Sarah relatable, yet pretty unlikable, were the most Louise-like choice and,as always,added so much depth to the story and so much authenticity to Sarah's character. She was a complex,raw,flawed mess of a human who was sometimes aware of her own shortcomings and who sometimes went off track,overwhelmed by the pressure of her circumstances,yet in the end she tried her best. Sarah is very much the nasty woman that we,as a society,need to get accustomed as well as used to. Her secondary characters are also great and complex and feel like proper humans that you could come across and the dynamics between them all feel just as realistic. That being said, Matthew can choke, Fionn is the newfound love of my life and Oonagh is a queen that can do no wrong. That is all. Sarah's friends from back home and the way they all interact do feel like real ways people who've known each other act around one another once they grow so differently.
The way Almost Love explores the theme of toxic infatuation is impressive to say the least. The way that certain 'relationship' starts and the way it develops and ends are so far from one another and you're taken by surprise by the whole ride that it is as a reader, you can't help but hold your breath a little bit for Sarah knowing where it is all headed. You also have the added nuance of the other hints of romance we see from Sarah's life. You can't help but root for her but live under the impeding failure of all those could-be love stories.
What I didn't quite expect,however,was the added subplot of art. I absolutely loved every little paragraph and sentence that we got that dealt with that theme and would have read another 200 pages of the book were they to deal with that,but alas,I did get just enough to keep me happy and it shall suffice.Not only was the theme of art such a great addition to the general plot as far as I am concerned,but the artistic persona added such an intricate layer to Sarah's character and her relation with art felt so tightly correlated to her relation with herself and those around her.
I also appreciated the feminism undertones sprinkled every now and again which,also,felt very Louise-esque.
Overall,I think I could confidently say that this is the raw,messy,real novel one would expect from Louise and she further solidifies herself as one of Ireland's most promising literary voices.I truly could spend hours talking about all the recurring elements and symbols in this book,as well as other general thoughts.If I had a hat on,I would take it off,but I do not,so it shall suffice to say I take my proverbial hat off and bow.
November 10, 2023
Well, that was such an uncomfortable read.
The author takes us back and forth between Sarah's past & present relationship, with her new boyfriend Oisin which is quite disturbin'. It was horrible to witness the extent to which her unealthy obsession for Matthew Brennan had shattered and impacted all her relationships.
Sarah is not a likeable character, she's toxic, selfish and self-centered. I swear being inside her head made me feel sick, it's painful. Her character is miserable and I tried to empathize but it’s hard. However, it's interesting how as you get to learn more about Sarah's old life before she moved to Dublin you realize that she's been broken since childhood. Her “relationship” with Matthew pushed her further to the brink of self-destruction.
Louise O'Neill did a good job and I would recommend this book but think twice before jumping in.
The author takes us back and forth between Sarah's past & present relationship, with her new boyfriend Oisin which is quite disturbin'. It was horrible to witness the extent to which her unealthy obsession for Matthew Brennan had shattered and impacted all her relationships.
Sarah is not a likeable character, she's toxic, selfish and self-centered. I swear being inside her head made me feel sick, it's painful. Her character is miserable and I tried to empathize but it’s hard. However, it's interesting how as you get to learn more about Sarah's old life before she moved to Dublin you realize that she's been broken since childhood. Her “relationship” with Matthew pushed her further to the brink of self-destruction.
Louise O'Neill did a good job and I would recommend this book but think twice before jumping in.
October 3, 2017
Louise O'Neill continues to astound me with her raw, honest, brilliant, talent. This novel is an absolute triumph! Full review to follow upon publication in March.
April 21, 2020
A powerful and emotional read. Louise O'Neill is very relatable in her writing. I think it'll be obvious early on to see that this isn't a romance novel of any sort - it's actually the complete opposite. More a doomed tale of obsessive love that goes horribly wrong. I am amazed but very impressed that this is a YA novel - because it deals with some really adult themes and although it's horrible to read, it's important to know that this sort of situation is real and can happen.
The story goes backwards and forwards and focuses on a young woman called Sarah who begins an illicit relationship with the father of one of her students. Matthew is everything Sarah has ever hoped for - he's charming, handsome and rich, what could be better? Except of course he's married.. and he only ever wants to see Sarah in secret... and he constantly lets her down with weak excuses.. and he punishes her by ignoring her for days.. and sometimes it feels like he is just using her for sex.. but Sarah is sure that this is what love is really about, and she's devoted enough to the thrill of being desired by Matthew that she forgives him everything, even when her life around her is crashing down.
I must search out more of this author.
The story goes backwards and forwards and focuses on a young woman called Sarah who begins an illicit relationship with the father of one of her students. Matthew is everything Sarah has ever hoped for - he's charming, handsome and rich, what could be better? Except of course he's married.. and he only ever wants to see Sarah in secret... and he constantly lets her down with weak excuses.. and he punishes her by ignoring her for days.. and sometimes it feels like he is just using her for sex.. but Sarah is sure that this is what love is really about, and she's devoted enough to the thrill of being desired by Matthew that she forgives him everything, even when her life around her is crashing down.
I must search out more of this author.
March 5, 2018
On its face, Almost Love is a story about a woman’s affair with an older man: how it started, progressed, and affected all of the facets of her life, both during and after. However, when I finished the book I felt as though, overall, this is just about a very unhappy woman.
Primarily, I found Almost Love utterly disappointing. But if there is a positive I can draw from reading it, it would be that the writing is good. This might seem a little petty, but Sarah (the main character) was a tangible character – to the point of me wanting to just shake her - and I wanted to keep reading, even if just to see if someone would finally tell Sarah off, or if she would get some help or have some kind of realisation or break-through. Although this did end up being a double-edged sword as I would spend a huge chunk of the book feeling utterly frustrated and annoyed, then there would be a glimmer that there was something more there… more to the story or an explanation of events that had led her to the person she was now, but then I would wind up being back where I started: frustrated and annoyed.
As real as the character felt, Sarah infuriated me. She is completely superficial, self-involved and quite contrary. She can barely contain her disdain for the small town that she grew up in and the people who have made lives for themselves there, finding money, power and status much more impressive, aspiring to fit in and have the kind of life that would include these aspects; however, there are numerous moments where she really appears to despise the people that she’s surrounded by. At one point, I found myself questioning whether she liked anyone. I just constantly felt that she couldn’t get out of her own way with anything - her painting, her friends, her relationships, her career, anything.
Sarah’s relationship (if you can call it that) with the older man, Matthew, is just awful. I was puzzled at how the relationship even got started. After meeting briefly a couple of times, the relationship seemed to jump from nothing to everything in the space of a conversation via text message. It was obvious to me from the start that it was purely infatuation on her end, but after the first “romantic” meeting, Sarah was almost eager to make herself small for him and she just grew more and more blinded by the fantasy that she had created. There are glimpses throughout their “relationship” where it seemed as though Sarah had some sense… moments in her head where she would hate herself for not saying what she meant and instead acting the way that she thought she should; but by the end of the story, that seems to have evaporated and I’m left not really knowing if she truly learnt anything.
My persistent longing for any resolution in this book, specifically with Sarah, was squashed by the end; my disbelief growing as I read further, only to be disappointed. And frustrated.
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I received a copy of this book from NetGalley in return for an honest review. All views are my own.
April 22, 2018
3.5 ⭐️ I although I enjoyed this first read from Louise O'Neil It didn't quite do enough to hand it four stars. I did find the main character Sarah a bit vapid and frustrating at times. Overall though a good story and well written.
March 4, 2018
5/5 stars.
Almost Love, like her previous novels, is brutally honest in every way. In this book, we follow Sarah, a young woman in her twenties that falls in love and gets obsessed with an older man, Matthew, with whom she has a physical relationship although, for her, it is way more than just that. We alternate between present and past and therefore see the impact this relationship has not only on Sarah but also on her present relationship.
Without a surprise, our main character is not very likeable which highlights a certain pattern in O'Neill's writing as the main character in Asking For It and Only Ever Yours is also hard to like. However, I couldn't help but feel my heart breaking while reading Sarah's downfall because of her relationship with Matthew and the way it affects her relationship with her new boyfriend, Oisín, three years later. But more importantly, I could relate to Sarah on some levels but especially to one, to a certain extent: the feeling that you are never good enough. Since her mother's death when she was only 10, Sarah always felt like she was never enough while comparing herself to others, which majorly impacts her behaviour with people. And this, right there, broke my heart so much.
More than just Sarah, other characters are also not likeable at all but that's what makes this story so real and raw; the characters are all flawed, sometimes irrational, emotional and selfish but aren't we all at times?
I honestly can't quite put into words what this book made feel, when I finished it and put it down I started silently crying for a couple of minutes because of how many feelings it made me feel. And I know this book will not be to everyone's taste but it was definitely to mine and it proved me one more time how talented Louise is and how much I love her writing as well as the messages she tries to transmit. So, obviously, I gave it 5/5 stars, and I cannot help but recommend it.
"All I ever wanted was for him to say that I was enough. If he said it, maybe I could believe that it was actually true."Louise O'Neill became my favourite author after I read her first two books, Asking For It and Only Ever Yours, which both succeeded in making me cry and think a lot after finishing them. Therefore, obviously, when I heard she was releasing a brand new book, and an adult one this time, you can bet that I pre-ordered it right away and faced snow, wind and freezing temperatures to get it on its publication day. And oh boy, do I not regret it.
Almost Love, like her previous novels, is brutally honest in every way. In this book, we follow Sarah, a young woman in her twenties that falls in love and gets obsessed with an older man, Matthew, with whom she has a physical relationship although, for her, it is way more than just that. We alternate between present and past and therefore see the impact this relationship has not only on Sarah but also on her present relationship.
Without a surprise, our main character is not very likeable which highlights a certain pattern in O'Neill's writing as the main character in Asking For It and Only Ever Yours is also hard to like. However, I couldn't help but feel my heart breaking while reading Sarah's downfall because of her relationship with Matthew and the way it affects her relationship with her new boyfriend, Oisín, three years later. But more importantly, I could relate to Sarah on some levels but especially to one, to a certain extent: the feeling that you are never good enough. Since her mother's death when she was only 10, Sarah always felt like she was never enough while comparing herself to others, which majorly impacts her behaviour with people. And this, right there, broke my heart so much.
More than just Sarah, other characters are also not likeable at all but that's what makes this story so real and raw; the characters are all flawed, sometimes irrational, emotional and selfish but aren't we all at times?
I honestly can't quite put into words what this book made feel, when I finished it and put it down I started silently crying for a couple of minutes because of how many feelings it made me feel. And I know this book will not be to everyone's taste but it was definitely to mine and it proved me one more time how talented Louise is and how much I love her writing as well as the messages she tries to transmit. So, obviously, I gave it 5/5 stars, and I cannot help but recommend it.
"Loving someone only gave them the opportunity to break your heart."
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