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Almost a Mother: Love, Loss, and Finding Your People When Your Baby Dies
Christy’s captivating memoir about her hopes, her dreams, her loss, her grief, and ultimately, her healing, is a poignantly powerful and brutally honest account of what happens when tragedy hits. We never think it’s going to happen to us. We never think it will happen today. But it does, and it happened to Christy.
In an effort to find solace, Christy tried Googling, “What do I do when my baby dies?” Unfortunately, there just aren’t many good resources out there—at least not any that are truly honest, not sugar-coated with clichés.
“Almost a Mother: Love, Loss, and Finding Your People When Your Baby Dies” is Christy’s way of reaching out to those who have experienced a horrible loss of any kind, of any magnitude, in the hopes of building a community of support and love.
And, in her words, “I just wanted to know that I wasn’t crazy because I wanted to punch the pregnant lady at Target in the face.”
In an effort to find solace, Christy tried Googling, “What do I do when my baby dies?” Unfortunately, there just aren’t many good resources out there—at least not any that are truly honest, not sugar-coated with clichés.
“Almost a Mother: Love, Loss, and Finding Your People When Your Baby Dies” is Christy’s way of reaching out to those who have experienced a horrible loss of any kind, of any magnitude, in the hopes of building a community of support and love.
And, in her words, “I just wanted to know that I wasn’t crazy because I wanted to punch the pregnant lady at Target in the face.”
- GenresNonfiction
218 pages, Paperback
Published March 29, 2018
37 people are currently reading
149 people want to read
About the author
Christy Wopat
4 books39 followersChristy Wopat is a middle-grade author and longtime educator who believes every kid deserves to see themselves in a story. She loves helping kids discover the joy of reading and the power of their own voices.
When she’s not writing, Christy can be found cheering at her kids’ activities, playing with her cats (Old Dan, Little Ann, and Kitty Kitty Meow Meow), or curled up with a good book. She lives in Wisconsin with her husband.
***
Christy Wopat’s award-winning memoir, titled “Almost a Mother: Love, Loss, and Finding Your People When Your Baby Dies” was published by Orange Hat Publishing in 2018. She is immensely proud of the three books about grief she wrote after her twins died shortly after birth.
Overall, Christy writes because she cares.
When she’s not writing, Christy can be found cheering at her kids’ activities, playing with her cats (Old Dan, Little Ann, and Kitty Kitty Meow Meow), or curled up with a good book. She lives in Wisconsin with her husband.
***
Christy Wopat’s award-winning memoir, titled “Almost a Mother: Love, Loss, and Finding Your People When Your Baby Dies” was published by Orange Hat Publishing in 2018. She is immensely proud of the three books about grief she wrote after her twins died shortly after birth.
Overall, Christy writes because she cares.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 40 reviews
July 2, 2018
I read this book front to back cover in 5 hours. I believe I cried (for the first time) about 12 pages in...
So much of this book resonated with me in terms of my own loss of my daughter. This book would have been so comforting in the early days of my grief journey.
So much of this book resonated with me in terms of my own loss of my daughter. This book would have been so comforting in the early days of my grief journey.
December 8, 2019
This book was recommended to be by a friend after I delivered my stillborn daughter at 38w 2d gestation. This book was not easy for me to read. I could only read a chapter or two at a time because it all hit so close to home that I would end up crying and have to put it down. That being said, I am so thankful to my friend Sara for recommending it to me, and to Christy Wopat for writing this. So many times I would read a line, or a paragraph and think to myself "exactly, I'm not the only one who feels this way," or "I'm not crazy, this is normal" or " she gets me, I hate that she gets me, but she really truly does".
This book is truly inspiring and helpful. It takes the most difficult thing I have experienced in my life, and helped me see that there is light at the end of this. I will never be the same person I was before the loss of my Hanna, but I will survive this.
"It's take me such a long time to learn that yes, the dates are important. And if you love someone who is grieving, for real, take out your calendar and write down days that matter. Record the birthday, the day they died, and maybe their wedding anniversary date. And text them. Call them. Write on their Facebook wall. All you have to say is, "Remembering with you today." Give them a hug when you see them. You won't break them. You'll help them heal in all those already broken places." Christy Wopat- Almost a Mother
This book is truly inspiring and helpful. It takes the most difficult thing I have experienced in my life, and helped me see that there is light at the end of this. I will never be the same person I was before the loss of my Hanna, but I will survive this.
"It's take me such a long time to learn that yes, the dates are important. And if you love someone who is grieving, for real, take out your calendar and write down days that matter. Record the birthday, the day they died, and maybe their wedding anniversary date. And text them. Call them. Write on their Facebook wall. All you have to say is, "Remembering with you today." Give them a hug when you see them. You won't break them. You'll help them heal in all those already broken places." Christy Wopat- Almost a Mother
March 31, 2018
Christy's book is honest, real, and validating. She's created space for so many who know grief, and made it ok to talk about it, live with it, and find light again. Proud to know her!
My full review in SEVEN Magazine >>> http://thesevenspot.com/articles/2018...
My interview w/ Christy in Coulee Parenting Connection>>> http://www.pageturnpro.com/Coulee-Par...
My full review in SEVEN Magazine >>> http://thesevenspot.com/articles/2018...
My interview w/ Christy in Coulee Parenting Connection>>> http://www.pageturnpro.com/Coulee-Par...
April 2, 2018
Christy generously opens her heart through Almost A Mother, sharing raw and honest experiences of the monumental grief surrounding the tragic deaths of her infant twins, Sophie and Aiden. Her writing offers up incredible insight and practical advice, while assuring the reader that hope, strength, and friendship can lead to amazing things. A must read!
May 30, 2018
This. This is the book I NEEDED to read. So many times while reading this book, I caught myself thinking, "her, too? I thought that was just me." All I can say is THANK YOU to Christy for writing such an honest book about grief and loss. So well written; a definite must read!
October 20, 2019
Honest, devastating, but hopeful look at grief. I cried so much while reading.
April 11, 2018
Christy's story was not one I could not stop thinking about as a read it, so potent sometimes that I needed to take a small break so that I could shed a few tears for her suffering and for the emotions it stirred. While I am probably not her primary audience, being someone who has never experienced infant loss or motherhood in a way that she has, there were sections of the book that helped me 1) understand better those who are and be a better friend (I hope!), and 2) find the strength in myself to better face the grief that I carry.
This book, though, is more than just the story of Christy's family and motherhood. She also looks at grief and healing from all sorts of angles. I thought a lot about her explanations of "at least" thinking and the "grief olympics"--this was spot on. It's not about who is hurting worse. Ever. I loved the way she categorized the types of people you meet when you are grieving. Unfortunately, I am probably one of those who stay quiet and don't say much, but I will say that I disagree/differ from her analysis for why--it's not because I am uncomfortable with a grieving person's pain; it's because I don't want to say anything that could possibly make it worse and hurt them more (or maybe this is a sixth type). I do identify though with what Christy advocates for people to do--acknowledge how much it sucks and that you're sorry for their pain. The way I put it is that, "I mostly just want your pity right now. Your optimism for my future isn't making me feel better in the slightest (it actually alienates me a little), but I'll let you know if I ever want your peptalk. But right now, nope." Christy gets it, and if you've never thought about it before, we can thank her for giving us the insight.
I knew Christy "before twins" as she puts it, and her voice, humor, and sass ring as true in print as they do in real life. Her story is honest and fascinating. You leave the book feeling like she has been sitting with you and you can't help but want to hold her hand to cry a little together. What a beautiful shoutout to the universe for Sophie and Aiden!
My only complaint is a TINY one, nothing to do with the writing and more with the physical book--the ink and pages felt a little on the "economical side," perhaps as if it had been printed with an ink-jet printer, where you can the embossing of the ink rising above the surface of the paper. I know this is a little nitpicky, I just hoped to have her publishing debut physically look closer to what the fancy bestsellers feel like. If I didn't know that she actually had a legit book deal with a medium-sized regional press, complete with editors and a signing tour, I would have suspected that it was self-published, just from the ink. Then again, the price was right, and I hope that helps it find its way into the hands of everyone who needs it.
This book, though, is more than just the story of Christy's family and motherhood. She also looks at grief and healing from all sorts of angles. I thought a lot about her explanations of "at least" thinking and the "grief olympics"--this was spot on. It's not about who is hurting worse. Ever. I loved the way she categorized the types of people you meet when you are grieving. Unfortunately, I am probably one of those who stay quiet and don't say much, but I will say that I disagree/differ from her analysis for why--it's not because I am uncomfortable with a grieving person's pain; it's because I don't want to say anything that could possibly make it worse and hurt them more (or maybe this is a sixth type). I do identify though with what Christy advocates for people to do--acknowledge how much it sucks and that you're sorry for their pain. The way I put it is that, "I mostly just want your pity right now. Your optimism for my future isn't making me feel better in the slightest (it actually alienates me a little), but I'll let you know if I ever want your peptalk. But right now, nope." Christy gets it, and if you've never thought about it before, we can thank her for giving us the insight.
I knew Christy "before twins" as she puts it, and her voice, humor, and sass ring as true in print as they do in real life. Her story is honest and fascinating. You leave the book feeling like she has been sitting with you and you can't help but want to hold her hand to cry a little together. What a beautiful shoutout to the universe for Sophie and Aiden!
My only complaint is a TINY one, nothing to do with the writing and more with the physical book--the ink and pages felt a little on the "economical side," perhaps as if it had been printed with an ink-jet printer, where you can the embossing of the ink rising above the surface of the paper. I know this is a little nitpicky, I just hoped to have her publishing debut physically look closer to what the fancy bestsellers feel like. If I didn't know that she actually had a legit book deal with a medium-sized regional press, complete with editors and a signing tour, I would have suspected that it was self-published, just from the ink. Then again, the price was right, and I hope that helps it find its way into the hands of everyone who needs it.
April 1, 2018
If you’ve ever had a baby die, or know someone who has, this book will touch you, make you gasp, and make you giggle. Christy has a honest and real way of writing about the loss of her twins, the aftermath of that loss, and finding her tribe of people to support her. The story of her struggle and survival offers hope to her readers. It’s a book I wish had been around when our baby died.
August 14, 2019
If someone you care about is grieving a loss, read this book!
I was unaware of Christy’s story until after I met her on a group trip to France in the summer of 2019 (thanks for not smacking me any of the many times I tempted you to do so, by the way!). After meeting her, I just had to read this book!
Christy’s story is raw and emotional, and that makes it has hard to put down as it does to read at times. Having a younger brother who passed away at the age of three from cancer, I have always thought about the emotions my parents had (I was only 5, so my memories are very vague) but have never felt I understood their grief enough to ask the questions I needed to discuss it with them, even decades later.
While this book provides one person’s road map for processing grief, for me, it was also a guide in understanding how to have meaningful conversations with people who have lost so much. I look forward to having that conversation with my parents. Thank you, Christy.
D. L’Cermak
I was unaware of Christy’s story until after I met her on a group trip to France in the summer of 2019 (thanks for not smacking me any of the many times I tempted you to do so, by the way!). After meeting her, I just had to read this book!
Christy’s story is raw and emotional, and that makes it has hard to put down as it does to read at times. Having a younger brother who passed away at the age of three from cancer, I have always thought about the emotions my parents had (I was only 5, so my memories are very vague) but have never felt I understood their grief enough to ask the questions I needed to discuss it with them, even decades later.
While this book provides one person’s road map for processing grief, for me, it was also a guide in understanding how to have meaningful conversations with people who have lost so much. I look forward to having that conversation with my parents. Thank you, Christy.
D. L’Cermak
April 8, 2018
I just finished a wonderful and powerful book that is not my story, but is in so many ways is my story. "Almost a Mother," by Christy Wopat, is the story of the loss of her twins shortly after birth at 24 weeks gestation.
This book is brutally honest and uplifting through the darkness of grief for her wonderful children, Aiden and Sophie. Christy is an amazing woman and writer.
She lost children who were born prematurely about three weeks after her water broke around 21 weeks gestation. As she points out, loss is not the right word, but saying dead is equally hard.
She and her husband missed so much potential in life -- the birthday parties they would not have, the high school graduations, the weddings and so on.
I didn't like the title of the book until I understood it. It was her sweet nephew who said to a stranger on the first Mother's Day after the loss, "Aunt Christy was almost a mother. But then she wasn't any more."
Christy ran from the store sobbing, which her nephew didn't understand. What was wrong? "Nothing, buddy," she told him.
"I went home that night, and I started a blog, 'Almost a Mother.' The very first line read, "Contrary to the title of this blog, I AM a mother.' ... In the end I know that my sweet nephew had NO idea that his words would carry such meaning. ... I am forever grateful that he did say those words, though, because they made me realize that I was not ALMOST a mother. I AM a mother."
Perhaps, I appreciate this book because I worked on materials and a book years ago to help parents who had lost a baby through miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy, stillbirth or newborn death. That experience helped me understand grief when I lost a son to leukemia just a couple of months shy of 9 years.
Our experiences are very different and very much the same in many ways. I understood her grief and continued presence of Aiden and Sophie and how much she wanted someone to say there names out loud. I continue to appreciate my son Matt and his siblings, Maggie and Michael.
Christy and her husband Brian went on to have two more children, Avery and Evan, but they still consider themselves parents of four. My husband and I consider ourselves parents of three. And the question of how many children we have is so loaded -- I say three, but we lost one to leukemia in 1986.
Reading this book is important, even if you have not personally experienced loss. It will help you understand how those who do experience loss feel.
We are all human on this bus which means we do not know how to respond or react when we hear someone say they lost a baby, a child, a sibling, a parent, a grandparent, who even a furry member of the family.
Even those of us who have experienced loss stumble. I know the only thing that can be said is, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry this happened to you" and then allow the person to express their loss and for you to say the name of their children. Even if tears follow, you honor these children. And the fact that my loss was in 1986 does not make it any less real to me.
We are inadequate in words because we are human and are uncomfortable. One person told Christy that maybe God decided Aiden and Sophie should not live because they might have turned out to be serial killers.
I'm gonna guess right now that Aiden and Sophie would not have been serial killers. They would have been wonderful adults who improved our world, one act of kindness after another.
In other words I think you should read it even if her loss is not your loss. It helps you to learn about loss, and appreciate the people in your life.
Thank you Christy.
This book is brutally honest and uplifting through the darkness of grief for her wonderful children, Aiden and Sophie. Christy is an amazing woman and writer.
She lost children who were born prematurely about three weeks after her water broke around 21 weeks gestation. As she points out, loss is not the right word, but saying dead is equally hard.
She and her husband missed so much potential in life -- the birthday parties they would not have, the high school graduations, the weddings and so on.
I didn't like the title of the book until I understood it. It was her sweet nephew who said to a stranger on the first Mother's Day after the loss, "Aunt Christy was almost a mother. But then she wasn't any more."
Christy ran from the store sobbing, which her nephew didn't understand. What was wrong? "Nothing, buddy," she told him.
"I went home that night, and I started a blog, 'Almost a Mother.' The very first line read, "Contrary to the title of this blog, I AM a mother.' ... In the end I know that my sweet nephew had NO idea that his words would carry such meaning. ... I am forever grateful that he did say those words, though, because they made me realize that I was not ALMOST a mother. I AM a mother."
Perhaps, I appreciate this book because I worked on materials and a book years ago to help parents who had lost a baby through miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy, stillbirth or newborn death. That experience helped me understand grief when I lost a son to leukemia just a couple of months shy of 9 years.
Our experiences are very different and very much the same in many ways. I understood her grief and continued presence of Aiden and Sophie and how much she wanted someone to say there names out loud. I continue to appreciate my son Matt and his siblings, Maggie and Michael.
Christy and her husband Brian went on to have two more children, Avery and Evan, but they still consider themselves parents of four. My husband and I consider ourselves parents of three. And the question of how many children we have is so loaded -- I say three, but we lost one to leukemia in 1986.
Reading this book is important, even if you have not personally experienced loss. It will help you understand how those who do experience loss feel.
We are all human on this bus which means we do not know how to respond or react when we hear someone say they lost a baby, a child, a sibling, a parent, a grandparent, who even a furry member of the family.
Even those of us who have experienced loss stumble. I know the only thing that can be said is, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry this happened to you" and then allow the person to express their loss and for you to say the name of their children. Even if tears follow, you honor these children. And the fact that my loss was in 1986 does not make it any less real to me.
We are inadequate in words because we are human and are uncomfortable. One person told Christy that maybe God decided Aiden and Sophie should not live because they might have turned out to be serial killers.
I'm gonna guess right now that Aiden and Sophie would not have been serial killers. They would have been wonderful adults who improved our world, one act of kindness after another.
In other words I think you should read it even if her loss is not your loss. It helps you to learn about loss, and appreciate the people in your life.
Thank you Christy.
July 8, 2018
This is an amazing book, so well written. Although I have not experienced anything like this, I could feel her pain throughout the pages. I cried, I laughed and had some OMG moments. I am a mental health therapist and I think this book can help so many people. It really changes a person when they can feel that they r not alone in their dark thoughts. I will be putting this on my shelf in office...just in case.
August 8, 2018
Dear Christy,
I just finished Almost a Mother and I almost don't know what to say... My son was stillborn at 26 weeks on May 17, 2014, since then I have had two more children, a girl and a boy. I wish I would have had your book when I was pregnant again after our loss. I cried reading your words because I felt like they were my own. The anxiety. The terror. The love. I have read so many books and articles about baby loss and from what I have found most of them are very strongly focused on the loss and "recovery" afterward, with a few chapters at the end about a new pregnancy or baby who became the author's source of joy etcetera. But yours has been the first that I have read that really went deep. It went to the dark places of pregnancy after loss. It went where I have been, where I still am sometimes, how anxiety has become one my most loyal companions. All I can say is thank you. Thank you for sharing your story with the world. Thank you for not holding back in your writing. I didn't realize how much I needed this book until I finished it. I plan on sharing it with everyone I know who has walked the same path you and I have.
With so much gratitude,
Krysta
I just finished Almost a Mother and I almost don't know what to say... My son was stillborn at 26 weeks on May 17, 2014, since then I have had two more children, a girl and a boy. I wish I would have had your book when I was pregnant again after our loss. I cried reading your words because I felt like they were my own. The anxiety. The terror. The love. I have read so many books and articles about baby loss and from what I have found most of them are very strongly focused on the loss and "recovery" afterward, with a few chapters at the end about a new pregnancy or baby who became the author's source of joy etcetera. But yours has been the first that I have read that really went deep. It went to the dark places of pregnancy after loss. It went where I have been, where I still am sometimes, how anxiety has become one my most loyal companions. All I can say is thank you. Thank you for sharing your story with the world. Thank you for not holding back in your writing. I didn't realize how much I needed this book until I finished it. I plan on sharing it with everyone I know who has walked the same path you and I have.
With so much gratitude,
Krysta
March 31, 2018
Never before have I read something that so seamlessly interweaves personal gut-wrenching memoir with supportive girlfriend-on-your-side practical advice and inspiration. Christy shares her story of the death of her infant twins, Aiden and Sophie, with unabashed honesty so that others who have faced loss may recognize themselves in the depths of her grief.
Each chapter begins with an artifact (email, blog post, text exchange) that captures the feelings as they were on the day they happened. As the chapter progresses, so too does Christy's ability to reflect on the experience with honesty and hope after the passage of time. This juxtaposition of raw grief with thoughtful reflection allows readers to see the messy, honest, never-completed grieving process as it really is.
Ranging from heartbreakingly poignant to laugh-out-loud funny, this book is for everyone who has experienced loss and everyone who wants to support someone who has.
Each chapter begins with an artifact (email, blog post, text exchange) that captures the feelings as they were on the day they happened. As the chapter progresses, so too does Christy's ability to reflect on the experience with honesty and hope after the passage of time. This juxtaposition of raw grief with thoughtful reflection allows readers to see the messy, honest, never-completed grieving process as it really is.
Ranging from heartbreakingly poignant to laugh-out-loud funny, this book is for everyone who has experienced loss and everyone who wants to support someone who has.
March 31, 2018
This book is one that will break your heart, lift your spirits, makes you laugh out loud and shows you the hope at the end of a very dark tunnel of grief. Christy Wopat's book tells the story of her infant loss of her beautiful twins Aiden and Sophie.
This is a book that is unlike any other on the market and is so, so needed. When we have a friend, loved one or even just an acquaintance who is in the thick of grief, it is often hard to know how to support them.This book can help with that. It offers advice for those who are supporting their loved ones in moments of grief with what to do and what not to say.
Everyone who has ever known someone who is grieving should read this book. Everyone who has experienced grief should read it to know they are not alone.
This is a book that is unlike any other on the market and is so, so needed. When we have a friend, loved one or even just an acquaintance who is in the thick of grief, it is often hard to know how to support them.This book can help with that. It offers advice for those who are supporting their loved ones in moments of grief with what to do and what not to say.
Everyone who has ever known someone who is grieving should read this book. Everyone who has experienced grief should read it to know they are not alone.
April 9, 2018
I loved every thing about this book. It was raw, emotional and best of all, for me, validated many feelings I was having but couldn’t express aloud after miscarrying two babies and numerous failed IVF attempts. I love how it shows support through unconventional ways (the internet) and in the process creating bonds of friendship that can never be broken. I recommend everyone read this book regardless of a personal loss. It can help those who have suffered a loss as well as offer guidance to those friends/family members on how they can best help.
July 22, 2018
As a loss mother myself I related to Christy’s story on so many levels. I laughed, I cried and I am thankful for my people who were there for me.
If you have lost a child I highly recommend reading this book. I read so many books after my loss but none of them hit the nail on the head as this one. Knowing that I’m not alone in the way I walk my journey with my own grief is incredibly comforting.
If you have lost a child I highly recommend reading this book. I read so many books after my loss but none of them hit the nail on the head as this one. Knowing that I’m not alone in the way I walk my journey with my own grief is incredibly comforting.
June 29, 2018
We need more stories of motherhood like this! Written with raw honesty, Almost a Mother has given voice to one of the many ways in which women’s experiences of motherhood and reproductive drama can be silenced by our culture. Christy Wopat illuminates this wrenching experience of reproductive loss with clarity, heart, and wisdom, while also offering up the beautiful possibilities of friendship, familial love, and a personal journey toward healing.
August 23, 2018
Help for the hurting
Christy Wopat has written a powerful book about the nature of grief. I highly recommend it to anyone who has suffered a loss, especially loss of a child. I especially, especially recommend it to those of us who haven’t had such a loss but who know a family going through that very thing. Christy’s honesty can help us learn how to truly be there for a friend in need.
Christy Wopat has written a powerful book about the nature of grief. I highly recommend it to anyone who has suffered a loss, especially loss of a child. I especially, especially recommend it to those of us who haven’t had such a loss but who know a family going through that very thing. Christy’s honesty can help us learn how to truly be there for a friend in need.
April 8, 2018
Almost a Mother is a must read for anyone who has suffered the loss of an infant, or anyone who loves someone who has suffered a loss. I wish I had it when my daughter went through this, I could have been a much better ally to her. Christy Wopat shares from her heart and opens up to her readers. You will cry, laugh and cheer. It explores the depth of sorrow and the beauty of joy.
July 2, 2018
Christy’s memoir is a heartbreaking, honest look at the grief she has struggled with. The story of losing Sophie and Aiden is woven together with profound love, loss, hope and humor that keeps you reading to the end. I hope others will find the hope and healing in this book as they travel though their grief or as they help others who may be suffering.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
May 10, 2019
4.5 stars. I have not experienced this sort of loss, but I found it very enlightening on how to approach someone who has. I have no doubts that the feelings expressed were very real, raw and life altering. There were places in the book where I got a little confused because the author skipped ahead or went back in time. That is my only criticism. This book will help a lot of people.
May 11, 2019
A perfect read for loss moms
So much of this book got highlighted. So much of it echoed the words in my head and the feelings of my heart.
My loss stories are different but this book got so close to home.
Thank you for sharing your story, your children and your words Christy Wopat
So much of this book got highlighted. So much of it echoed the words in my head and the feelings of my heart.
My loss stories are different but this book got so close to home.
Thank you for sharing your story, your children and your words Christy Wopat
August 26, 2018
I chewed through this so quickly. Very readable, very relatable. While my experience isn't exactly the same as the author's, this book really struck some emotional chords for me and I valued reading about each bit of healing knowledge she was able to find.
April 1, 2019
Touching
It took me a couple of years to have a chance to read this. Being in that same small midwestern town...actually in a classroom down the hall, I had known a book was in the works, but was always too crazy busy to take the time to read it.
I am so glad I finally did!!!!
It took me a couple of years to have a chance to read this. Being in that same small midwestern town...actually in a classroom down the hall, I had known a book was in the works, but was always too crazy busy to take the time to read it.
I am so glad I finally did!!!!
May 30, 2019
All I can really say is thank you to the author for having the courage to write this book. As a fellow almost mother it means to so much to me to have my feelings validated by someone who experienced something so similar.
January 25, 2020
First, I want to thank Christy Wopat for providing me with this book so I can bring you with this review.
Christy Wopat literally brought me to tears and had me wanting to jump into Almost a Mother and give her a big comforting hug. She is incredibly brave to open up her heart and genuinely let us into her personal life and share her experience of loosing twins. I commend her for writing this book as it not only was therapeutic for her-but it could help others as well.
Whomever designed the cover is a genius! Not only is it incredibly beautiful with the hands lifting up the flying butterflies-the meaning behind it is so perfect!
Christy wrote an incredibly beautiful letter to the readers at the beginning of the book for all of those who just lost a baby or knew someone who did. I admit I laughed out loud when she mentioned the Lifetime TV Movie about the crazy lady who lost the baby who goes around stabbing people. I’m an avid watcher of that channel and know exactly what she is referring to.
This was Christy’s true story to tell in her own words of everything she went through-her feelings, emotions, mental state, the before and after she lost her two precious babies. She writes with passion, all heart and is very genuine.
One thing that made this book stand out and made it more personal was she added pictures. She added pictures of the babies’ birth certificates, of their Christmas ordainment's, and when Christy was pregnant. She also shared emails back and forth with friends she corresponded with that she met in support groups. I am glad she had them to lean on for support so she didn’t feel alone.
This book is not just about the loss of her babies-it is so much more.
Christy Wopat literally brought me to tears and had me wanting to jump into Almost a Mother and give her a big comforting hug. She is incredibly brave to open up her heart and genuinely let us into her personal life and share her experience of loosing twins. I commend her for writing this book as it not only was therapeutic for her-but it could help others as well.
Whomever designed the cover is a genius! Not only is it incredibly beautiful with the hands lifting up the flying butterflies-the meaning behind it is so perfect!
Christy wrote an incredibly beautiful letter to the readers at the beginning of the book for all of those who just lost a baby or knew someone who did. I admit I laughed out loud when she mentioned the Lifetime TV Movie about the crazy lady who lost the baby who goes around stabbing people. I’m an avid watcher of that channel and know exactly what she is referring to.
This was Christy’s true story to tell in her own words of everything she went through-her feelings, emotions, mental state, the before and after she lost her two precious babies. She writes with passion, all heart and is very genuine.
One thing that made this book stand out and made it more personal was she added pictures. She added pictures of the babies’ birth certificates, of their Christmas ordainment's, and when Christy was pregnant. She also shared emails back and forth with friends she corresponded with that she met in support groups. I am glad she had them to lean on for support so she didn’t feel alone.
This book is not just about the loss of her babies-it is so much more.
February 17, 2020
Christy’s twins passed away exactly one month prior to my daughter. We both eventually found solace in the online baby-loss community of bereaved mothers where we were comforted, supported, and found the refuge we so deeply needed. We will both tell you that we feel they saved our lives. I cannot imagine what my life would look like right now if I hadn’t found the understanding, encouragement, and love that our network provided me with.
I tore through this book in mere hours. I knew Christy’s story but it has been years since I’ve read about the intricate details, and I’ve never read it in its entirety before the book. I cried multiple times, and now that it’s been almost eleven years I was even able to laugh at the absurdity she encountered because I, all too well, understood and experienced it for myself, and I was also reminded of the beauty that came from my pain. I know this book can be a lifeline to those fresh in their grief who are trying to survive in a society that mishandles grief with platitudes and misguided expectations. While those who have never lost a child may never fully understand the depth of pain and despair a grieving parent experiences, this book can be a great resource for those who are willing to listen and open their hearts and minds in a way that can be beneficial and life-changing for those in their lives that may have faced the unimaginable loss of their child. Read this. Share this. Gift this.
Thank you, Christy, for bearing your soul and your story for others to bear witness to. I know they will walk away forever changed. Your Sophie and Aiden continue to affect this world because they have an incredible mother. Xoxo
I tore through this book in mere hours. I knew Christy’s story but it has been years since I’ve read about the intricate details, and I’ve never read it in its entirety before the book. I cried multiple times, and now that it’s been almost eleven years I was even able to laugh at the absurdity she encountered because I, all too well, understood and experienced it for myself, and I was also reminded of the beauty that came from my pain. I know this book can be a lifeline to those fresh in their grief who are trying to survive in a society that mishandles grief with platitudes and misguided expectations. While those who have never lost a child may never fully understand the depth of pain and despair a grieving parent experiences, this book can be a great resource for those who are willing to listen and open their hearts and minds in a way that can be beneficial and life-changing for those in their lives that may have faced the unimaginable loss of their child. Read this. Share this. Gift this.
Thank you, Christy, for bearing your soul and your story for others to bear witness to. I know they will walk away forever changed. Your Sophie and Aiden continue to affect this world because they have an incredible mother. Xoxo
May 3, 2018
I so appreciated the raw beauty of Christy’s book. The honesty of everything after losing a baby. The grief, the anger, loneliness, jealousy, the longing, etc etc. The anguish and despair that takes place when those babies are officially gone forever. I bawled my eyes out as she described the primal sound that escaped her when her son Aidens time of death was pronounced. The sound she will never forget. I bawled because I too know that sound that can never be forgotten. It’s a sound I heard from myself when I allowed the sweet nurse to take our son to the waiting funeral home staff. Christy says how grief will “redefine you and change you as a person.” This couldn’t be more true. I am not the same person I am before losing our little Ethan. I’m thankful Christy poured her soul into writing this book.
November 5, 2024
It has been a long time since I’ve read a book cover-to-cover in two days, and longer still since I had to set a timer to remind me to put the book down and get back to work. Both were the case with this beautifully written memoir. Wopat guides the reader on her journey through unspeakable grief—never preaching, sometimes laughing, always telling the truth, HER truth—and offers hope. Of course, parents experiencing the death of a child will find solace here, but also, anyone who loves anyone grappling with grief—which means EVERYone—will find insights to help them be better friends to those who are struggling. (Hint: “I’m sorry and what’s happening to you sucks” can go a very long way.) This book is a masterclass in honesty, healing, humor, and grace.
September 7, 2018
I'm crying uncle. I'm a man, I'm a man who has never lost a child, I'm not a woman who has lost a child... I am empathic... as a rule... but this one is to much for me... that fact that I am being summarily dismissed along with those who: say something, don't say something, say the wrong thing, show up and are there, don't show up or aren't there... breath in, breath out... all of which are wrong... it is to much... I feel your pain, I empathize... even tho that will not be believed... and will be summarily dismissed... I made it over 1/2 way thru the book... it's not worth the aggravation at being a none child bearing man...
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