Sleeping Like A Baby

by Pinky McKay

Are you obsessed about your baby's sleep? Do you feel 'weak' because you can't leave him to cry himself to sleep? Do you need to relax more and enjoy being a parent?
Parenting expert Pinky McKay offers a natural, intuitive approach to solving your little ones' sleep problems and gives practical tips on how

Genres: Parenting, Nonfiction

324 pages, Paperback

First published July 1, 2006

Reviews

[Jennifer Thompson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Extremely highly recommended to all parents. If I could give 10 stars, I would.

The quickest parenting book I have ever read, not because it is light in content but because I was so hungry to read all of it and apply it to my world. At the time, I was struggling hard with my first child's sleep. I was at odds with the standard infant sleep advice that tells me I have to let my baby cry at some point, that I should never cosleep, never feed to sleep, and never feed on demand. Even the most gentle of advice I had been given was telling me to put him in a cot and "shush" him to sleep without making eye contact.

Pinky McKay never changed how my baby slept (although the book is loaded with many suggestions if you do want/need change), what it did was change my understanding of how and why babies sleep & feed like they do. It was enough for me to know my instincts weren't broken, and my baby was sleeping/feeding as evolution had intended. And every baby sleeps/feeds in a different way so you should never compare to another.

I can't believe the change I went through in just 5 days of this book. I went from being at the end of my coping skills and crying all day at the thought of trying to get him to nap or sleep again (and for the times recommended in other books!), to feeling relaxed and confident in my body, my baby, and my instincts. I felt like I'd been given permission to be the parent i wanted to be.

[Catherine · Rating 4 out of 5]

Whilst I don't practice all of the methods discussed in this book I think it's a natural, calm, gentle approach to newborn care and sleep. I also read Gina Ford's "The New Contented Little Baby Book" which I refer to as an 'extreme right wing' approach to newborn care. This on the other hand leans more to the left - a more natural and gentle approach that reminds the reader that every baby is different and a one size fits all 'routine' is not going to be the solution for every baby and babies will settle in their own time. I think this is an important and reassuring message for new parents desperate for a good night's sleep. I think it's good to read both the 'right wing' and 'left wing' approaches, taking the advice that seems relevant to your situation and disregarding that which you are not comfortable with to come up with a happy medium.

[Nick Thorne · Rating 3 out of 5]

One of the better ‘baby books’ I’ve read. More Instinctive and kinder approach to parenting. Can’t go too wrong reading it. However that main criticism is that it’s FULL of bad science, all the baby books are, but it never ends in this book. ‘Studies conducted by [university/person] have demonstrated some mothers to report....’ I mean come on, no mention of even a sample size and no references to the study. No references to any studies in the entire book. In the end the book is just a bunch of opinions.
The best part of the book came near the very end “Having a child is a privilege. A baby is a gift of life and it is up to each of us lucky enough to share this tiny life to make it worthwhile - to nurture and grow this little being, teaching it how to love and to love life.”

[Eliza Genang · Rating 4 out of 5]

The first night baby and I were home from hospital, just 3 weeks ago, she wouldn't let me put her down so I held her the entire night. I felt like a failure - what bad habits was I forming? Was it dangerous to hold her when I might fall asleep myself? What about SIDS? That's when I remembered this book that a friend had gifted to me while pregnant and it was just the chill the hell out message I needed. It somehow gave me permission to enjoy the small moments like when my baby sleeps on me. It seems semi ridiculous to me that I would need any kind of 'permission' especially from some random who wrote a book, but that's where I was at at the time and it was a heartening read.

[Sharolyn · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was perhaps looking for some more concrete solutions, but instead Pinky gave me permission to go with my instincts. She re-affirmed there is no perfect solution. Every baby and every situation is different. An encouragement that we are on the right track.

[Anais TORELLI · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not a sleep solution, but freeing from the guilt of co-sleeping and feeding to sleep

Only a dozen of pages actually talk about how to move away from feeding to sleep, the whole book rather explains why it is normal and healthy that baby feeds at night and loves feeding to sleep.
It helped me feel better with myself about co-sleeping and feeding my baby to sleep up until this point, however when I bought this book it was because this was no longer sustainable for me, and because contact naps were not allowing my baby to have long peaceful naps so I was worried for him too.
I enjoyed the read but it didn't respond to my primary need, I am now reaching out to sleep consultants...

[Anna · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book provides very useful advice. Although it doesn't offer a single, simple solution to baby sleep issues (probably because there's no such thing), it provides a range of strategies to consider and try.

The most valuable message that I got from this book is that it's more important to do what works for me and my baby, rather than what I think my baby and I 'should' be doing. It also reinforced that any change will take time, and I hope that remembering this will help me be more relaxed as I try to help my baby to sleep.

[Susan Fodor · Rating 5 out of 5]

Few babies sleep all night. It's a fact! If you read this book, you'll read the stats on babies that sleep through the night, and you will be surprised. The lie that babies are supposed to sleep alone in their cots 12-hours has been propagated everywhere. This book set me free from the misconceptions I'd been carrying around. I wish that I'd read it during the pregnancy, it would have saved me so much heart ache.

[Kimberly Whitty · Rating 4 out of 5]

Nourishment for the soul. If your little person doesn't sleep by themselves in another room for the prescribed times other books give, if putting him/her down "drowsy but awake" results in uncontrollable tears and you feel awful doing it but feel you have to, please read this book. Your baby is normal, society's unrealistic expectations are not. Be reassured of your instincts and enjoy looking after your baby in a respectful, loving way.

[Jessica Leaney · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am so very glad I read this book! This is the best baby book I have read by far. I wish I read this in the early weeks after my son was born, but im so glad I read it by the time he was 6 months. I noticed I felt a stronger bond with my son just 2 days after implementing some of the ideas in this book. My son seemed happier and cried less. I truly believe this book is going to transform my parenting and help me be a better parent throughout my son's childhood.

[Louise · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book advocates a gentle, intuitive approach to sleep and I felt very reassured about what I am doing. It also helped me to realise that what my baby does is perfectly normal and there's nothing wrong with the fact that he doesn't yet sleep through the night.

[Gina K · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was hoping to find a “magic pill” that would put my now 2-month-old to sleep and that I hadn’t come across elsewhere. Well, I haven’t. Moreover, at 30% point I realized that I’m reading through the same information that can be found on the Rednose, Raisingchildren and other websites with scientifically proved content. However, I’m giving 5 stars because this book echoed with the approach to upbringing that I was already developing for myself and reassured me that it had the right to exist. Some passages are very touching, maybe my mummy brain is the one to blame for this sharpened susceptibility. And I really enjoyed other parents’ accounts, they felt genuine and pertinent.

I found chapter 4 particularly curious. It concisely goes through stages of early development and corresponding changes to children’s sleep, giving a nice eye to the future. Probably there’s nothing “new” in there either, I just haven’t looked into later stages yet.

To summarize, the book is an ode to common sense and parent intuition with an unobtrusive accent on co-sleeping, including bed-sharing.

[Rachel Jb · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is fantastic. Rather than trying to push sleep training or any "one size fits all" approach to baby sleep and care, this book teaches parents how to respond to their individual babies and what they need. The author discusses myths about baby sleeping, including that babies are "supposed" to sleep through the night by a certain age. So much pressure is put on parents (including by ourselves) to get baby to self-settle and sleep all night, and avoid anything that might form a "bad habit", but this book takes all that pressure off, and validates parents' feelings and instincts. It takes a gentle approach to sleep, and doesn't try to push babies into doing things before they are developmentally ready.
This book helped me to be able to relax and enjoy time with my baby rather than worrying about nap times, bad habits, and night wakings.

I highly recommend this book to all pregnant mothers and parents of babies and toddlers. It is a wonderful book.

[Anna · Rating 1 out of 5]

As with so many of the baby book genre, specifically baby sleep books, the author uses gross exaggerations to make her point. She draws a picture of children who are psychologically traumatized by being locked up for 12 hours, crying, for sleep training. Letting aside that you‘d be hard pressed to find anyone in their right mind who still advocates this type of sleep training, I was not convinced that the author‘s touchy feely „intuitive“ approach makes more sense.

Personally I was looking for some reasonable and usable approach to help my baby sleep better. I admit, I bought this late one night as I was trying to get my newborn to sleep. Admittedly not the best time to be buying self-help books.

[Fiona · Rating 3 out of 5]

A simple book which is helpful when you are sleep deprived. A ‘gentle’ perspective that doesn’t help you ‘fix’ bub but rather come to terms with what babies do and need as they grow. Reassures you that this is a challenging phase but some helpful mindset stuff to help you grow in acceptance of this phase of newborn life. The chapter on self care is the pinnacle of the book and much needed for anyone trying to deal with baby sleep (or a lack thereof).

My only criticism is that a lot of the content is avail for free on Pinky’s blog, so you may not get much new info if you’ve read her articles. I would however like to read the toddler one as I think her approach there is much needed.

[Donna · Rating 4 out of 5]

Some great information as a new mum and agreeable advice. One of the better books I’ve read yet still didn’t offer me any magical solutions.
I found looking up free resources/ research websites and wake windows information, signs to watch for a tired baby, & sample routines online more useful in terms of sleeping tips particularly such as “Taking Cara Babies”. https://www.takingcarababies.com/blog...
I also follow their page on Instagram they have useful little videos.

[Kristina · Rating 3 out of 5]

I wish I'd read this when I was still pregnant, 9 months in and most of the information she shares I've figured out. I did find one chapter particularly useful so will be attempting to change how I put my baby to sleep using her approach. I do like that she is very anti sleep-training and backs it up with science.

[Jenny · Rating 5 out of 5]

A very reassuring and gentle approach

I loved this book. After reading many other sleep related books and articles, I was tearing my hair out. My baby does not comply with these (perhaps unrealistic) hard-line approaches and they made me feel incompetent and resentful. I feel much more calm and comfortable with this gentle, respectful and loving approach to parenting and sleep.

[Kristen Anne · Rating 5 out of 5]

Didn’t really change what I was doing for my daughters sleep but changed the way I viewed the whole issue. Thoughtful, science backed advice with a strong focus on nurturing the mother-child relationship.

[Kate Davies · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book reminded me how quickly the infant stage passes and reflect on how much my first child’s sleep changed without me doing anything. It gave me some tips and tweaks I can make to help my low sleep needs babe while maximising my own sleep.

[Emma · Rating 5 out of 5]

Empowering!

This was the first parenting nook that made me feel empowered and encouraged mre to trust my innate maternal intuition. Thank you Pinky!

[Robyn · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very encouraging.

[Juli · Rating 3 out of 5]

Reassuring but somewhat lacking in practical help

[Reneille Wilson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Instinctive parenting reinforced

So lovely to read a book that reinforces my natural instincts as a new parent. Still a bit scared about co sleeping though!

[Talya Saada · Rating 5 out of 5]

Good advice and gentle sleep solutions for babies and toddlers. No controlled crying, schedules or routines just simple sensible ideas, tips & tricks.

[Timothy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Encourages you to listen to your baby and be flexible knowing that every baby is different.

[Julia Kafle · Rating 3 out of 5]

I thought it would have been more instructional, step by step. The book gave a lot of advice on different reasons why a baby may not be sleeping through the night and gave a lot of examples of how other people coped. The book mainly encourages you to work with the baby and finding a middle ground than sticking to any routine/plan. I have marked a few pages to refer back to. The book makes you believe that no matter what happens, that the baby is crying or not sleeping for a reason and to find out what that reason is. My take-away from this book is to know that your baby's only way to communicate is through crying, whether it's that they need attention, a cuddle, feed or sleep it's all communicated through crying and that the baby is too young to manipulate you by crying to keep you awake/attending to them.

[Jo · Rating 4 out of 5]

Whilst there was No direct advice on how to get my baby to not get up at 4am it was still a very worthwhile read. If recommend it to all new parents.

[Kyla · Rating 1 out of 5]

The contents did not match the title, very vague advice and no "simple sleep solutions".

[Cindy Coventry · Rating 5 out of 5]

I can not recommend this book (or any of Pinky's) any higher, she brings years of personal experience of loving and care, and provides gentle parenting ideas which are just lovely, and practical.