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Breaking Vases: Shattering Limitations & Daring to Thrive: A Middle Eastern Woman's Story
Breaking Vases powerfully and vividly captures the rich heritage of one woman’s Middle East, along with its brutal realities, which followed Dima Ghawi from her native Jordan to her adopted country, the United States. Brought up in a small, conservative Christian community in Amman, Dima learned to be quiet and subservient to her elders and to men. When she was just five, Dima’s beloved grandmother warned that a woman’s greatest responsibility was to preserve her image—one as fragile as a glass vase—and the honor of her family’s reputation. Anything less was shameful. Yet her grandmother also planted a the simple hope that Dima could graduate from college and become the first formally educated woman in her family.At nineteen, hoping to free herself from cultural constraints and her father’s turbulent temper, she accepted a traditional marriage proposal from an older, affluent, and seemingly Western-minded jeweler. Newly married and in a state of naïve love, she happily uprooted her life in Amman and moved with him to California. But San Diego’s “Little Middle East” was not her American dream. She soon realized that her husband was more traditional and controlling than she had imagined. Changing her circumstances would be dangerous and require courage Dima had never known before. Nevertheless, she was determined to transform her destiny, even if it meant standing alone and facing life-threatening consequences. Her memoir captures the terrors and joys of escaping confinements, crossing continents, and daring to discover and create a bold identity and life purpose.
- GenresNonfiction
232 pages, Paperback
Published January 7, 2018
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Displaying 1 - 21 of 21 reviews
November 3, 2018
Abuse. Sometimes physical and mostly mental. But the degrading feeling an abused person undergoes cannot be soothed with any balm. Breaking Vases: Shattering Limitations & Daring to Thrive - A Middle Eastern Woman's Story by Dima Ghawi is a story that must be told. Must be heard in every household where women are often hidden from society in the name of honor and family pride.
Dima's story starts off with a natural eastern flavor. I felt ashamed because in some parts I started questioning what the heck is the issue here. I started doubting if the book was at all about abuse. Some of the scenes are so natural in all families that it never draws to you that it's not natural. It's not natural not to have a choice. It's not natural not to have a say in your house. And it's not natural to lead a life where your education is considered a luxury.
But into this world of social deprivation is born a little girl called Dima. Where she is taught to obey her father without questioning his authority. As she grows up she learns to curb her questioning nature for it would bring out bouts of fight in the household. And the exact same transfers to her husband when she gets married. This part of the story I found very interesting. Her heart filled with romance and while I am sure her husband did care for her, but his upbringing, where he is taught that women are the weaker sex, does not let him give his hundred percent to his marriage. There are many places in this book where you will question the absence of abuse. But as you read on, the subtle way it has been introduced is mind-blowing. It's an abuse of rights. An abuse of relationship. A psychological abuse.
Breaking Vases is a story of Dima who breaks every social norm to reach a level where she becomes a motivator for many women. Her story is a story of immigration, of starting a new life with nothing. It would have been so easy to give in. To accept the life she felt was destined for her. Yet she chose an independent path which must not have been easy for her. More than fighting the abuser, fighting the society becomes more difficult.
Check out the full review here
https://www.rubinaramesh.com/2018/11/...
Dima's story starts off with a natural eastern flavor. I felt ashamed because in some parts I started questioning what the heck is the issue here. I started doubting if the book was at all about abuse. Some of the scenes are so natural in all families that it never draws to you that it's not natural. It's not natural not to have a choice. It's not natural not to have a say in your house. And it's not natural to lead a life where your education is considered a luxury.
But into this world of social deprivation is born a little girl called Dima. Where she is taught to obey her father without questioning his authority. As she grows up she learns to curb her questioning nature for it would bring out bouts of fight in the household. And the exact same transfers to her husband when she gets married. This part of the story I found very interesting. Her heart filled with romance and while I am sure her husband did care for her, but his upbringing, where he is taught that women are the weaker sex, does not let him give his hundred percent to his marriage. There are many places in this book where you will question the absence of abuse. But as you read on, the subtle way it has been introduced is mind-blowing. It's an abuse of rights. An abuse of relationship. A psychological abuse.
Breaking Vases is a story of Dima who breaks every social norm to reach a level where she becomes a motivator for many women. Her story is a story of immigration, of starting a new life with nothing. It would have been so easy to give in. To accept the life she felt was destined for her. Yet she chose an independent path which must not have been easy for her. More than fighting the abuser, fighting the society becomes more difficult.
Check out the full review here
https://www.rubinaramesh.com/2018/11/...
November 13, 2018
Dima exhibited great courage in writing her book Breaking vases. It is uncommon for a Middle Eastern woman to tell her story in such an honest and sincere fashion. I actually purchased a few copies of the book and gifted them to female friends who grew up in the Middle East. The feedback to the book was unanimous. They all related similar stories about their experience living with an abusive father. Some were forced to marry men of the fathers' choosing and ended up living a difficult life.
Dima's book is a breath of fresh air that will energize and offer hope to many women. I plan to give her book as a Christmas gift this season.
Dima's book is a breath of fresh air that will energize and offer hope to many women. I plan to give her book as a Christmas gift this season.
November 11, 2018
I have read Dima's book and it was truly an inspiration. As an American raised by a Middle Eastern mother, this courageous story opened my eyes to so much that I recall seeing in my childhood. As a man, it inspired me to look at the social conformaties and expectations that I myself am living in and as a result, I have been able to break a few of my own vases! I highly recommend this to any person, male and female, who are looking to expand beyond their past story and current circumstances!
January 3, 2018
I had the privilege of meeting and getting to know Dima when she was in Japan. She always has a smile on her face. I highly recommend this inspiring book of how she has overcome negative forces and have become not only a successful business woman but a happy and kind human being with always a smile on her face.
January 21, 2018
It is Within You
Be warned - most readers do not face the magnitude of obstacles this author faced to come to self-realization. After reading this you’ll understand that reaching your potential is well within your grasp.
Be warned - most readers do not face the magnitude of obstacles this author faced to come to self-realization. After reading this you’ll understand that reaching your potential is well within your grasp.
November 30, 2017
What an excellent read and such a powerful book to read of such a courageous lady and friend. A must read to show that you can pursue your dreams despite pressure all around.
July 21, 2018
Love this book! Powerful story written by a very strong woman
November 11, 2021
I read this entire book in one sitting. Dina Ghawi gave a college-wide presentation at my place of work, complete with literally breaking a couple of glass vases, and then the college gave each attendee a copy of this book for a later follow-up book club discussion with the author.
This was a moving and inspiring message. I think it is difficult for someone who has never been in a controlling, abusive relationship to ever comprehend the fear and paralysis, and the lengths you will go to avoid provoking the anger of the controlling person, whether a parent, spouse, or employer. It took tremendous courage for Ms Ghawi to leave those abusive relationships, and entirely another level of courage for her to open up and publicly share them and use her own hurt to inspire others to free themselves from whoever or whatever is limiting them and holding them back.
This book will not resonate with every reader. People who are full of self-confidence and independence may find it trite or shallow. However, it has great potential to plant a seed of hope in those who have been crushed and limited by angry, controlling relationships. It does not “soft sell” how difficult and even dangerous it is to leave and slowly get established in your own personal and professional life, but it does put in perspective how critically valuable that independence is.
I’m torn on the star rating. The language is often simple and sometimes stilted, and even the descriptions of depression and fear were somewhat detached. It reads more as reporting the events than drawing the reader in, despite the first-person narration and deeply personal subject matter. If half-stars were an option, I would select 3-1/2 stars. I’ve read several books on the subject of controlling, abusive relationships, and this was not one of the most moving or well-written among them. However, it did address some cultural and familial issues that gave me a different perspective, and I was sincerely moved by the courage of this woman. After much reflection, I leaned to 4 stars, rather than 3.
This was a moving and inspiring message. I think it is difficult for someone who has never been in a controlling, abusive relationship to ever comprehend the fear and paralysis, and the lengths you will go to avoid provoking the anger of the controlling person, whether a parent, spouse, or employer. It took tremendous courage for Ms Ghawi to leave those abusive relationships, and entirely another level of courage for her to open up and publicly share them and use her own hurt to inspire others to free themselves from whoever or whatever is limiting them and holding them back.
This book will not resonate with every reader. People who are full of self-confidence and independence may find it trite or shallow. However, it has great potential to plant a seed of hope in those who have been crushed and limited by angry, controlling relationships. It does not “soft sell” how difficult and even dangerous it is to leave and slowly get established in your own personal and professional life, but it does put in perspective how critically valuable that independence is.
I’m torn on the star rating. The language is often simple and sometimes stilted, and even the descriptions of depression and fear were somewhat detached. It reads more as reporting the events than drawing the reader in, despite the first-person narration and deeply personal subject matter. If half-stars were an option, I would select 3-1/2 stars. I’ve read several books on the subject of controlling, abusive relationships, and this was not one of the most moving or well-written among them. However, it did address some cultural and familial issues that gave me a different perspective, and I was sincerely moved by the courage of this woman. After much reflection, I leaned to 4 stars, rather than 3.
September 26, 2020
A great book that takes you on Dima's journey from a growing up girl to a well-educated and leading professional lady!!
It shows the things most women used to/continue to suffer from in middle east countries!
Dima dared to thrive, and chased her dreams that seemed so impossible to her!
On the first chapters, you might get bored, a little with the language used to describe events.. but with chapters going on and Dima's life evolving, more excitement is added to the reader, language gets a bit stronger, and events become more appealing !
It is great that it is one of those books that send hope and motivate the reader !
I wish all the strength and all the happiness for all the women all over the world! and for everyone!
Always dare to dream and follow your biggest of dreams!!
It shows the things most women used to/continue to suffer from in middle east countries!
Dima dared to thrive, and chased her dreams that seemed so impossible to her!
On the first chapters, you might get bored, a little with the language used to describe events.. but with chapters going on and Dima's life evolving, more excitement is added to the reader, language gets a bit stronger, and events become more appealing !
It is great that it is one of those books that send hope and motivate the reader !
I wish all the strength and all the happiness for all the women all over the world! and for everyone!
Always dare to dream and follow your biggest of dreams!!
December 26, 2018
As an Arab woman who immigrated to the US and had her share of struggle with self-identity, profession, culture, purpose, etc I connected so much with the book. The narration was smooth, it was an easy read. The cultural norms she dealt with are different than mine, given she comes from another area in Jordan and a different time than I do. I loved hearing about her going after her life despite her fears, conquering them yet feeling them.
July 25, 2019
“Each and every one of us has a vase to shatter; each of us has the ability to reject shame, to claim our own identity, and to pave our own path—living out loud and in the light.”
These are the last English words in the Epilogue of this fabulous book. That is the bottom line lesson that Dima Ghawi wishes we learn from her life experiences. She has told her story in such a simple, heartfelt way. You cry and laugh and cheer almost all at the same time. A book everyone should read!
These are the last English words in the Epilogue of this fabulous book. That is the bottom line lesson that Dima Ghawi wishes we learn from her life experiences. She has told her story in such a simple, heartfelt way. You cry and laugh and cheer almost all at the same time. A book everyone should read!
January 18, 2021
Dima Ghawi tells her story with real bravery and writes scenes from her youth so clearly that you can imagine them. For such a difficult and heartbreaking story, it's approachable and easy to read. Dima's courage shines through from beginning to end, and the compassion she finds for those who hurt her is admirable. For anyone feeling like they've got an uphill battle, Dima's story of courage and perseverance will inspire!
February 15, 2023
This was a true story of the life of a Jordanian woman who escaped and abusive father and husband. The “vase” is the ideal perfect life that you want to put forward to the world, but it needs to be broken in order to live a normal life instead of a lie. This was interesting and well written. My kind of book. I love seeing survivors. Especially women who overcome tremendous odds. This was that story.
July 24, 2018
Dima Ghawi is a true inspiration. I recently saw her speak in person and she is fabulous! Can’t wait for Leadership & Lattes! Her book takes you on her personal journey to the Middle East. It reminds me of my mother’s and old sister’s stories in the 1940’s & 60’s, respectively; however theirs stemmed from poverty rather than Dima’s cultural gas-lighting.
June 11, 2019
Very inspiring, I think Ms. Ghawi told readers enough of her personal experiences to get her point across, yet didn't make it sound like she wanted readers just to "feel sorry" for her. The book was extremely well written, and she should definitely feel pride in what she was able to do for herself and for her mother and sister. God bless them all.
July 19, 2022
I met Dima at a convention where she spoke to a room of 400+ women about her experiences. She's a powerful speaker for women's personal growth and leadership. This book shares her story about her abusive father and husband, and how she not only got herself out of those situations, but also got her mother and sister free as well.
September 19, 2019
I felt the writing was a bit dry and distant.
But the author's story and strength is impressive and I can see the importance of putting it to paper!
It is a unique perspective from a not often heard from voice.
But the author's story and strength is impressive and I can see the importance of putting it to paper!
It is a unique perspective from a not often heard from voice.
November 18, 2019
An inspiring story of courage, determination, resilience, and perseverance.
March 22, 2023
great book:) definitely reccomend, roller coaster of emotions! I couldn't put this book down, not alot of people know of the book but it should definitely be more popular.
March 1, 2025
This book is fabulous - I couldn’t put it down and finished it in 3 days!
July 5, 2020
Rating 4.5: Such an amazing story and told so beautifully well. The vase, being a metaphor, lets you picture the symbolization of what is being told. I'm from the states and learning how women can be treated in other parts of the world is saddening. I'm glad the author was able to tell her story and hopefully empower others to break from their constraints and live their life the way they should/want to. This is definitely a read, to not only educate yourself, but to everyone to follow your dreams.
I received a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
I received a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
Displaying 1 - 21 of 21 reviews