Do Listen: Understand what's really being said. Find a new way forward. (Listening Book, Mindfulness Books, Self Growth Books)

by Bobette Buster

At a time when a bit more listening might serve us well, Do Listen is a handy guide to the art of communication. For anyone who wants to hold meaningful conversations, speak with eloquence, and build community, here is an accessible handbook with tips on how to listen skillfully, take a discussion deeper, and speak about difficult topics with respect. Full of exercises and practices that can be applied in the workplace, at a social event, or around the dinner table, Do Listen provides readers with the tools to hold engaging conversations and create profound personal connections.

Genres: Nonfiction

112 pages, Paperback

Published September 25, 2018

Reviews

[Luca · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is my new favourite in the Do Book series. I was already enchanted by Bobette Buster's other Do Book, Do Story, but this one is even better. Reading this is just like listening to this incredibly good and captivating story somebody with a gorgeous voice is telling you. As an introvert who likes to spend time listening to people, I genuinely hope that more people would read this little book, and take Bobette's advice to heart.

[Carys · Rating 4 out of 5]

(Audiobook) maybe a 3.5 rounded up

[Ján · Rating 3 out of 5]

An inspirational book. Full of deep and interesting stories and exercises that will interrupt your daily routine. It took me some time to learn about the importance of listening, so I’d recommend anyone to take a shortcut like this book :-)

[Latifah Rizky · Rating 3 out of 5]

Pretty interesting short read.

[Mat · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book really resonated with me and got me thinking of the importance of listening to others, and not just friends but also people who have views different to you. The example of the black man who would befriend members of the Ku Klux Klan and often cause them to renounce their membership was so powerful. As was the section on the psychology of sound and voice which has since caused me to call or leave audio messages for friends on their birthdays.

[Little · Rating 1 out of 5]

I tried really hard to get something out of this book. Just found it patronizing, out-of-touch, and that it totally missed the mark.

[Ninnasi M · Rating 4 out of 5]

a good book to start reading from do series.

—
“Courage is a spiritual muscle that, once activated, can stimulate the imaginations of other people and inspire them to make their own choices, too.”

Kadang emang butuh satu kisah nyata atas keberanian seseorang melakukan sesuatu (positif) supaya kita juga jadi berani melangkah.

“Listening is the only way we can continue to grow and flourish as individuals - and as a society.”

“When the French pilots during the Great War were in trouble they would shout into the radio, ‘M’aider! M’aider!’ — a shortened form of ‘Venez m’aider’, French for ‘Help me!’ This became the international call sign ‘Mayday!’ for help in crisis.”

Nah jadi tahu sekarang awal mula Mayday jadi pertanda butuh pertolongan 🧐

“But if we choose to not listen to what makes us uncomfortable, how will we ever grow? How can a democracy exist without debate, negotiation, and compromise?”

“When we’re not listening, we’re not communicating.”

“Angry people are poor communicators and even worse listener. Their empathy is foreshortened, and they have trouble imagining the other’s point of view.”

“Listening takes time. You must pause, take a moment, and offer yourself to another person, with your full attention.”

“Real authority comes when you are able to strike the right balance. You need to listen to others, and you need to be attuned to yourself.”

Penting untuk para leader atau pemimpin.

Native American saying “If you want to understand someone, walk a mile in his moccasins.”

“Perhaps the hardest thing to do as we grow up and grow older is to stay young and curious.”

“Somehow, by listening and not returning fire with fire, we move on to a kinder and more mature place of understanding.”

[Riley Walsh · Rating 4 out of 5]

In everyday life we close ourselves off to each other, walking down the street with tunnel vision, focused solely on today's latest problem, learning nothing and meeting no one. I love the concept of opening your ears to the world. Hearing the morning's chirping birds, deeply hearing music, making morale-necessary small talk, and basking in the world's noise.

Every one has a deep desire to be heard-- for their story to be told. Truly making someone feel heard can provide value to you as well; not a transactional one, but an existential one. When we share in vulnerabilities we become more connected and more comfortable.

As story listeners, we cling to moments of epiphany and courage- and those moments come alive with sensory details. When stories resonate with us, we are more likely to share ours, resulting in deep human connection.

I really enjoyed learning from someone with a storytelling (and story listening) background. Stories are one of my favorite things. It is unlikely that I will ever underestimate the value of listening ever again.

[Lisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

An inspiring, reflective short read on the importance of listening, really listening.

I’ve previously read Do/Story in the same series also by Bobette Buster and I do recommend reading these together.

In a short, very accessible and engaging way, Do/Listen avoids being preachy, but reflects on how easy it is to not make the time to listen to other people, other ideas, or just the world around us. And provides a useful reminder on the benefits of listening, as well as practical exercises to help you begin.

[Hannah · Rating 5 out of 5]

I recently stumbled upon The Do Lectures after watching a talk by one of the KLF and then found their collection of books. This was my first one and I absolutely loved the way this author delivered her message through a combination of experience, encounters, poignant quotes and major moments in recent history. There are also mini exercises to try out to improve your listening skills. Looking forward to reading more of these little books of wisdom!

[Rachel · Rating 4 out of 5]

What a delight! Not only is the foundation laid with interesting facts about hearing, but with varied perspectives and examples from current relevant events from the last couple of years and in a captivating voice I was encouraged that I too can grow in my ability to truly listen and not feel love but be love in action.

[Sophie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Don't expect a book which goes in depth on listening skills, this is rather a collection of anecdotes where listening made a difference. It comfortably sits somewhere between non-fiction and poetry. An easy read, and yet I closed this book feeling hopeful. One that will stay with me awhile.

[Paul Taylor · Rating 4 out of 5]

Short but with some good advice and good exercises for those who need to improve their listening skills.

[Sam · Rating 5 out of 5]

really quick read but powerful and really interesting

[Taryn · Rating 4 out of 5]

Short and simple, but full of good reminders about the power and possibilities of listening. Not hearing, but listening. Told by a foil sound buff.

[Kar Liang · Rating 4 out of 5]

Really enjoyed reading this easy to read but profoundly important book as the message is to practice the list art if listening. Listening to connect and appreciate another human being.

[Caroline · Rating 4 out of 5]

To read and read again, to remember how it’s important to listen.

[Pudsey Recommends · Rating 4 out of 5]

A small gem, packed with practical wisdom.

[Razielsghost · Rating 3 out of 5]

It was okay, read better books regarding similar topics.

[Imanta Nīgale · Rating 4 out of 5]

Quick and easy to fly through. I appreciate the author’s stories and loved the reflection activities at ends of various chapters.

[Aude Réco · Rating 3 out of 5]

Parmi mes chouettes découvertes lecturesques de 2022, il y a Écouter : pourquoi la véritable écoute ouvre de nouvelles voies, de Bobette Buster. Un titre un peu longuet, mais l’écoute des gens qui m’entourent est vraiment une priorité depuis toujours, et j’aime me dire que mon écoute sans jugement aide parfois celleux qui en ont besoin.

Néanmoins, je ne me suis pas tournée vers cet ouvrage pour encore mieux écouter (à un moment, il faut savoir admettre que l’on fait déjà au mieux), mais… pour (espérer) apprendre à m’écouter, moi.
J’avais tendance, il y a encore quelques années, à faire passer mon entourage avant moi-même. Attends, je vais t’aider pour préparer ceci ; Tu n’as pas assez de crêpes ? Je vais en préparer en catastrophe… Et tant pis pour ma santé mentale.
Le problème n’est, évidemment, pas de dépanner les gens, mais entre certains sens uniques et des dépannages qui empiétaient sur ma propre gestion de la maison (alors que je n’ai pas forcément les cuillères pour à cause de mes migraines et de la fatigue générée par mon hyperacousie), il m’a fallu intervenir dans mes propres habitudes.

J’ai apprécié ma lecture d’Écouter parce que l’autrice s’attache autant à l’écoute des autres qu’à l’écoute de soi. Elle y parle des souvenirs sonores, notamment.
Il est bien sûr question, dans ce livre, de réelle écoute (quand on ne fait pas semblant de s’intéresser aux propos de l’autre) et d’écoute qui implique ne pas forcément croire la personne que l’on écoute, sans pour autant la juger ni chercher à réinterpréter ses propos.
L’autrice se base sur des éléments et des professions concrets (comme le journalisme), sur des faits divers, aussi. (C’est là que j’ai entendu parler, pour la première fois, de l’effet témoin avec le meurtre de Kitty Genovese, une célèbre affaire américaine.)