Affairytale

Affairytale #1

by C.J. English

#1 Amazon kindle bestselling book-diaries and journals.

I’d fallen tragically in love with a man who was always just out of reach. I knew two things for certain. Levi was the man I could never live with. Grant was the man I could never live without.

Grant was a rare gentleman, intelligent and gorgeous; a man every woman desired. Every cell in my body was telling me that he was my happily ever after. I was stuck in a marriage of mediocrity, I ached for red silk romance and carry me away passion, but not with my husband. I craved Him. Living without him was cruel and unusual punishment, even for my wandering heart.

Finalist, National Indie Excellence Awards 2016
Finalist, Readers Favorite Book Awards 2016
Finalist, Independent Author Network Book of the Year Awards 2016
Finalist, Beverly Hills Book Awards 2015

“…a story you only read once in a lifetime. Her writing was unconditionally spell binding.”
-Belgian Naughty Reader Book Blog

"Together they prove true love is worth waiting and fighting for."
-Beaute' De Livres Book Blog

"We found ourselves riveted…"
-Totally Booked Blog

“…mesmerizing, breathtaking and spectacular!”
-SueBee

*Prepare to love it or hate it. Affairytale will rip your heart out and make you hate the author so bad you’ll want to throw it/her at the wall. Or, you will understand and root for love to win. Not for readers under 18, not for readers who can’t stomach real life affairs and why they happen, not for readers who send hate mail and not for readers who like to settle in and get comfortable. This is a cringe worthy, stomach wringing, pain inducing true account of a real life affair that will leave you with no doubt that true love really does exist.

Genres: Nonfiction, Romance, Memoir, Friends To Lovers, Contemporary, Contemporary Romance, Forbidden Romance

330 pages, Unknown Binding

First published May 20, 2015

About the author

Readers Favorite Award-Winning author. Plant eater. Wine drinker. Pit bull momma. Hell-bent on saving animals.

Pick up WTF am I supposed to eat? A dieters manifesto if you want to lose weight and stop eating animals. Or check out Rescue Matters, if you love animals and want to be inspired to make a difference--suitable for anyone with a beating heart.

Affairytale and Forever After are no longer available as originally published. Affairytale is being adapted into a work of fiction and will be released on my fiction author platform under C.J. Love-Jones. Thanks for your support and for stopping by!

https://linktr.ee/CJEnglish

Reviews

[SueBee★bring me an alpha!★ · Rating 5 out of 5]

★★★★3/4! AFFAIRyTALE (stand-alone memoir) about one woman’s journey through a troubled marriage while fighting her attraction to her one-true love!

“Our web of less-than-desirable circumstances was complex and gut-wrenching to think about.”

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“All of Me” by John Legend captures the longing and their epic, soul-searching love! [Click to listen!]
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Books in series should be read in order:
Book 1: Affairytale
Book 1.5: Forever After

AFFAIRyTALE is a candid account of one woman’s affair, but as name would indicate parts of her story has a fairytale feel to it, more specifically the epic love she found with her lover.

Charmaine (Summers) English, C.J. had an affair; she is forthcoming about that. This is not her story about making excuses. In fact she owns being vile and bitchy lying and sneaking, she owns going about it wrong and she even admits and explores why…. But this is not so much a story of if or why rather of “what if?”

What would you do if you felt trapped in a toxic marriage and you loved another man for half a decade?

Yup this memoir spans over a decade, from around the time an eighteen year old C.J. met her husband-to-be, Levi Summers and after a tumultuous courtship married him so that they could be a family unit with their daughter, Dani. But they were toxic together…

C.J. had already met Grant English by then. In fact, she was utterly miserable on her wedding day because she was thinking of him. Grant was her brother’s best friend and they all vacationed at the same lake each summer. For years she carried on a flirtatious friendship under the watchful eye of a very jealous – and rightfully so – Levi.

Though C.J. was absorbed, obsessive even in her dealings with Grant much of the story is her trying to get Grant out of her head, forging ahead with her life, her career and motherhood, while her marriage remained dysfunctional. She stayed and made do, taking her anger and bottling up.

Then each summer they’d be back at the lake house; drawn to each other like magnets, the intensity of their attraction and bond palpable their destiny inevitable… But their timing always seemed off, with so much in their way. Add to that Grant’s hot-cold demeanor.

What finally gave and how did it all play out? This is their tale of an affair and an epic love.

“That kiss was a kiss goodbye. A let-me-down-easy, I really do care about you but this was a mistake.”

Grant English, her brother’s best friend and the love of her life. An enigma, a gentleman, the too good to be true guy! At times I wanted t to scream at him: “Do it!” “Tell her!” “Grab her!” “Make her!” My heart bleeds for all the years lost.

“He lured me in with his tenor and then held me captive with his timbre.”

Charmaine (Summers) English, C.J. well this is your memoire a candid look into everything you were and weren’t; are and aren’t; your fears, insecurities, heartaches, anger…. longing, frustration… and then that once-in-a-lifetime love.

“Mostly I pondered why he kept showing up in my life and why I had such an unbreakable attachment to him.”

AFFAIRyTALE told from C.J.’s POV, is a poignant look into an affair; the pain and devastation it caused. But also a thought-provoking and inspiring story about finding a love of a lifetime. It’s not an easy read, it was angsty, frustrating and even painful to read at times, depicting a gut-wrenching yearning.

For me it was mostly un-put-down-able, addictive, beautiful, hopeful, mesmerizing, breathtaking and spectacular! Thanks for sharing C.J.!

“I want ten-thousand more days with you.”

***
Hero rating: 5 stars
Heroine rating: 4.5 stars
Sexual tension rating: 5+ stars
Sex scenes rating: 4.5 stars
Sex scenes frequency: 4 stars
Plot rating: 5 stars
Dialogue rating: 4.5 stars
Storytelling rating: 4.5 stars
Story ending rating: 5++ stars
*********************************************
Overall rating: 4.75 stars

Would I recommend this book: Yes.
Would I re-read this book: Yes.
Would I read future books by this author: Yes.



C.J. and Grant, here’s to another 10,000 days! I wish you continued happiness and love and a long and beautiful life together. May AFFAIRyTALE be a huge success taking you places and giving you more opportunities.

Levi, may you find your destiny and the happiness you deserve. Remember NOT too stare too long at the closed door or you will miss the window that just opened up.

ARC provided to me by author C.J. English in exchange for an honest review.

[Patty ~ Wrapped Up In Reading Book Blog · Rating 4 out of 5]

*****FOUR STARS*****
{BR with Mel and Sharon}

I wanted to live, really live before I die. I wanted to know what it feels like to be loved by the man of my dreams.
Levi was the man I couldn't live with, and Grant was the man I couldn't live without.






This is the second non-fiction book I've ever read of my own free will. The first was Rob Lowe's autobiography, and let me just say, I enjoyed C.J.'s book far more!! That's really a compliment because back in my early days, I was head over heels in love with Rob Lowe!!



In the beginning of the story, I started to question if it was a good idea to read someone's real life memoirs because what if I ended up hating this book? It would be hard to criticize the author. I'm not going to lie, in the beginning I was having a tough time liking her. She didn't paint herself as the saint or victim, but I did relate to her. I too married Mr Wrong when I was younger, for stupid and naive reasons. Friends and family warned me not to, but I didn't listen, just like C.J.




Some of us, when we're younger, make really bad decisions. Sometimes we just have to learn the hard way. It was so obvious from the start that CJ never should have married Levi. There was an instant connection between her and Grant. As soon as he enters the story, you can't help but find yourself rooting for these two to get together.



There are some seriously horrible fights that go on between CJ and her husband. I wished that I could have been friends with her at this time and told her that life is too short to spend it with someone who is so clearly not the right person for her. These two were like oil and water. My buddy reading pals and I had a tough time during these arguments because CJ seemed to be the evil witch during these moments and Levi was the unsuspecting husband, desperate to make that connection with his wife again. Desperate for her love. It wasn't until after I had a chat with my girl, Allison, that I got a little insight into why the author wrote these scenes the way she did. If I were in her shoes I probably would have done the same or just would have cut out a lot of the fight scenes all together since the story really was about CJ and her one TRUE LOVE!!



Grant and CJ spend many years apart from each other. But no matter how much time went by, they always found their way back to each other. I was dying for CJ to get her man. Honestly, Grant seems too good to be true. He's every woman's dream come true. I honestly don't know how she didn't just jump his bones all those times they were alone.



There are some sexy times but they're mainly glossed over and that was fine with me. I must add that they don't have sex until after she has left her husband and moves into her own apartment.







I really just started to love the book once it mainly focused on CJ starting her new life and relationship with Grant. I felt for her every time she was a bit insecure and worried that Grant would never end up committing to her. I was right there with her when she was having that melt down in Hawaii!!




I'm happy that she got her man and the HEA she wished for. It makes me believe that maybe there is a prince charming out there for those of us who still haven't found him yet! :)

[Flo · Rating 5 out of 5]

5 riveting STARS

“I ached for red silk romance, and carry me away passion, and I ached for it with nobody else but him. He was a breed of charming I couldn't resist.”

I just read the most beautiful and unique story. Colour me surprised, but this book was one of my absolute favourite reads in a long time, quite possibly the last few years. And it's non-fiction, a memoir. Everything is real and it just makes it all so much more wonderful. I laughed, I was heart broken, I got angry and I wanted to scream and I cried tears of joy. Stunning book - about a woman who had an affair and the consequences that came with it.

Affairytale was a gamble for me. C.J. English is a first time author and she very kindly asked me to review her book. We all know how that doesn't always pan out, but this time around I got a complete win. I actually feel like buying copies and giving them to my friends and most definitely my mum...I know she would devour this if it ever came out in my mother tongue.

I was completely hooked from the first page and if I hadn't been forced to stop by my health I wouldn't have put it down for a second.

And it's all real! As mentioned above, Affairytale is a memoir. I just want to stress it again since I myself didn't get it at first glance. And I did a little research. Everything depicted here, happened so in real life. C.J. kept a journal all through her twenties and now she keeps one together with her husband. That's how she can go into such detail and can dazzle us with her incredibly well written life story...

“If all marriages are unhappy and take work, then mine was no different.
I stayed because I was foolish enough to believe those things were true.”

Do you believe in love? Do you believe in the ONE true love?

C.J. was looking for it, just as most of us do and she found it when she least expected it - after already being married to the wrong man. Affairytale depicts her life over the span of more than ten years. She gives us a very detailed look into her life, her life decisions, her relationships and how she found her true love and became unfaithful to her husband at the same time.

It is really hard to summarize the book without giving it all away, so that is all you are going to get from me.

I normally would judge a character on how he or she appeared on a page, but I really can't do that with a real life person. Who am I to do that? You just have to take this as it is. C.J. tells you her story and if you want to be judgemental you better read another book. She shares her reasons, hopes and fears. She is a real human being, not some some made up caricature. She has flaws and follies and not to mention a crazy hair every once in a while.

But what is essential to this book is the relationship and love between Grant and C.J., oh and what a great tale it is. I really believe everyone should meet them and fall in love with their love story. And bonus, Grant and C.J. are on the actual cover if you are interested to know.

“I wanted that. I wanted to find someone who belonged with me like the stars belonged with the sky. Someone I could get lost in, who would make me forget about reality for a while, who would adore me second to none.”

For those of you who would ask how one could ever read a book written by a cheater, about cheating. I completely understand. Cheating is a delicate issue for me as well. I have been cheated on and even though I'm in a very happy relationship and engaged now I still get angry beyond measure just thinking about what my ex did. And then there is the nagging feeling that you are just not enough. It just never ever leaves you. It happened once and you kind of expect it to happen again. Nothing I can do about that. So yeah, hot topic all around.

But that being said, reading Affairytale the whole cheating thing is kind of sexy as a romance trope, if you let out the real life. But then you are reminded that this is actually a memoir and let me tell you what you read is brutally honest and also completely understandable. And the dilemma begins anew. It was a bit of a mindf*ck in that regard. I was rooting for the cheater, but I hated it at the same time. 'It' being the cheating and in no way the book.

I think what made it right for me were two things. C.J. struggle to do right by her daughter, her husband and her family and friends. I could really feel her pain and the weight she carried around all those years. It's not an easy read and it shouldn't be. And the second thing is the end result. There just was no other ending possible. Being faithful or not, I don't know what to say...true love on the other hand...who could deny that? I dare you to fight it. Seriously.

At times painfully honest, incredibly brave and unbelievably heart breaking to read. Goes right up on my best-of-2015 reads. Thanks C.J. for sharing your story with us! You made me fall in love with being in love.

**ARC very kindly provided by the author in exchange for an honest review.

[Allison ❤️Will Never Conquer Her TBR❤️ · Rating 5 out of 5]

$2.99 on AMZ this weekend only (reg $4.99) 6/12/14- http://amzn.to/1L49QXH

5+++ All Consuming Stars!


Photo credit- Pinterest- Affairytale (CJ and Grant English photoshoot)





Affairytale, A Memoir, was unlike any other reading experience I've encountered. EVER. Let me preface my review with the fact that I have NEVER read a non-fiction book. I guess I always thought non-fiction was autobiographies and I, quite frankly, could care less about famous people's self-absorbed life stories. I had no idea non-fiction has love stories. This is the life love story of a young woman named Charmaine (nicknamed C.J.).... her story to tell and nobody else's. And what a beautiful one it was!





Affairytale takes place in Minnesota and spans a timeframe of twelve years. CJ is our narrator and we take a journey in her shoes one day at a time. From those early days of first-love with Levi, the birth of her daughter Dani, her marriage, and her summers spent at the cabin by the lake with her family in Northern Minnesota. It's during those summers that CJ begins a friendship with a handsome, athletic guy named Grant English. Grant fast becomes her brother's best friend and she's the third during all the fun times each and every summer. Day by day, week by week, summer after summer, her feelings grow from that of easy fun to a deep-seated love and yearning for a man she can never have.







Affairytale is, quite simply, a love story of epic proportions. It's about finding your one true love that is meant to be your soul mate thru every fiber of your being, yet being bound to another. It's the tug within your heart that reaches deep for that connection, grasps it, yet you just can't hang on because your heart has been promised to another- even if your heart isn't 100% invested anymore. It's about marrying a person you love, the father of your child, because it's the right thing to do but the relationship is far from perfect...it's also the most selfless sacrifice to your happiness in this life.





I knew within 10% of this book that I was reading something special. Affairytale is a very candid, engrossing friends-to-lovers trope, yet as I read along, I kept thinking to myself, "This story is real and this is their love story! They're living and breathing and Ms. English has ripped open her chest and poured out her heart for me and all the world to see." Because of this, I couldn't help but personally reach out to CJ. Via emails and messages, I connected wholeheartedly to her as a person, on page and in real life, telling her that it was surreal for me to actually chat with one of my book heroines! The book is so personal and she is so like-able, it just added to my reading experience tenfold.


C.J. English has a writing style I don't see too often. Her prose is poetic, detailed, and almost lyrical. It is amazing to me that this is a debut novel for a woman that started out writing a diet/exercise book and ended up telling her and Grant's love story. Because the writing was so beautiful and the story so touching, I found myself reading at a snail's pace- my heart pounding, closing out the world around me just to live within the pages of this book. This isn't a book for her to claim to be a victim. It's not vindictive. She highlights her mistakes, her flaws, her feelings, turmoil, and eventual happiness to finally connect with her one true love. I've never dealt with most of the things she's endured but I did find myself comparing my marriage to some of the things I too encountered in those early years together- we fought dirty. Thank goodness for gradual maturity. But I guess that made it even more relatable to me.





Let me approach the elephant in the room. This is not a book about cheating. I know the title is a cute pun on the word affair but it's really not the focus at all. It's their fairytale romance come to life. Yes, there's cheating. I know that's a hard limit for many and I respect that wholeheartedly. Let me also say this is not smut and the way that it's written, with the years upon years apart, fighting their inner feelings, not even admitting to each other how they felt, I found myself quietly rooting for CJ and Grant. It's almost impossible to truly put yourself in her shoes and NOT root for happiness for all- including Levi. Nobody is at fault. Nobody is innocent. Everyone is imperfect and this is not a book about pointing fingers and she and Grant just hopping into the sack. It's a slow build of epic proportions...years, in fact, and the emotional side of the affair outweighs anything physical. But the eventual physical side the actual intercourse occurs AFTER her separation from Levi and it was written with such a sensual undertone, her writing was almost seducing...





And now the story is over for me. I wish Grant and Charmaine English a life filled with love and eternal happiness. 10,000 days! I thank CJ for sharing her heart love story with me. I know this book wasn't written for profits, but to get her story out and what a beautiful story it was. One final piece of advice to the author...Quit your day job. You have a beautiful gift. Share it with the world! We pancake flat-butted women can find another drill sergeant exercise trainer to make us look like a booty-licious Brazilian model.

Affairytale was taken from journal entries, saved texts, and personal recollections. The book cover and top picture is, in fact, Grant and CJ).


And I thank you!




***Thank you, Flo, for such an outstanding review that made me one-click this baby in warp speed.

***Note author's comment to my review below. If you're on the fence about reading this, maybe a little teaser into their current normal life will help...I'd buy this book for everyone whose experienced this profound love before...if I could.

Buy link- http://amzn.to/1Io9Jps
Affairytale book trailer- U-Tube- http://youtu.be/zUDhKkyKol0

[Jennifer Kyle · Rating 4 out of 5]

”Everyone gets a do-over”



I’m pretty sure this is the only memoir I have read to date. I loved the author’s ability to paint herself in her best and worst light and tell her story.

To be honest, I found the first 40 percent of this story pretty slow going and wished she had given more in most areas. For example, not until after forty percent did I have any connection whatsoever to Grant the man of her dreams, the man she feels she should have married. It was all just glossed under the umbrella that they had a lot in common and continuous fantastic conversation each and every summer. However this could be reduced to the fact that this is in fact a memoir.

”He was my greatest loss, yet I hadn’t even had him yet.”

Once C.J. and Grant actually address their feelings the story takes flight and so does the affair. This is the point where I started my fall for Grant and got to see how incredibly sweet and wonderful he is.

”I craved him. I needed him. I was myself when I was with him. I had married the wrong person, therefore I’d become the wrong person. No ironically, I was having an affair that was turning me into the right person.”

I did personally struggled with C.J. when it came to Levi and how I would feel if my husband was always thinking of someone else and how I pale in comparison to what they could have. I’m hoping a happy ending comes for Levi as well. The author also comes across as having the best parents in the world to babysit while she frolics in the sun days on end and nights out. However, I’m pretty positive keeping her child out of the memoir was purposely done.

C.J. and Grant’s love affair and future seems truly magical (hoping that the surgical clips were actually removed) and was a pleasure to read. I recently went to Maui with my family so that was a blast to read about. The ending was seriously heartfelt and simply put it was sweet. Overall, C.J. English if she wanted could have a solid future writing romance novels!

”I love you so much, I can’t believe it’s really you.”

*Copy provided by C.J. English in exchange for an honest review*

[Sophie's Reading Corner · Rating 5 out of 5]

Affairytale is a memoir of a woman who fell in love with the right man while she was in the wrong relationship. For years this had remained a secret desire, but their chemistry was palpable and they couldn't keep it platonic anymore.

True Love always finds a way. Sometimes...it starts with an affair.

This is a story that will stick with me for a very long time. I think it's one of my unforgettable reads. And I'm saying that in the best way that you can say that this is a memorable love story. And most importantly? A real love story.



I don't like judging people. I never liked that and I was always against that. In fact, I'm a hater when it comes to gossip. Maybe because I was grown up in a big city, visiting my village often and seeing how much people there thrive in gossip. I always hated shoving my nose in other people's business and judging them and that's why I want to consider myself as an open minded person. So, I will not judge CJ and her actions, because right or wrong, she's a person and who is perfect? Who has a flawless life without mistakes, maybe even regrets? Even though I felt bad for the husband, Levi, I could understand CJ and the reasons that pushed her towards Grant. I adored their journey and I'll be watching out for their updates.

Summer or winter, Grant or Levi, risk it or save it.

I felt like a stalker while reading the book, like I found a journal and I was reading it behind their back. But I admire how bold and brave she was. And mostly because it wasn't a known fact.. Yes, people suspected that their relationship existed before CJ took a divorce, but certainly, no one knew for sure. That makes me applaud for them even more. I loved how honest she was with her inner thoughts and feelings, with her actions, even when they didn't flatter her. She put herself out there, creased her image and how can you not admire that? Not all of us have the balls to do something like that.

I truly enjoyed this memoir, even though it was my first time reading one, I fell in love with this story and their journey. The writing was absolutely honest, raw and poetic in a way. It was such a heartfelt story and I loved it!! I even teared up at the last part of the book! Can't help but wish them happiness and to be together forever.



Copy was kindly provided by the author in exchange for an honest review. Thank you!

PS: Thank you so much, Allison, for the recommendation! <33

[Brandi · Rating 4 out of 5]

Affairytale is a memoir, a story about a young woman who marries the wrong man, and as the years go by, finds herself unable to deny the true love of her life. An honest account of an affair, and falling in love. It's heartbreaking, yet beautiful. I can't judge CJ's story, what's right or wrong, I haven't lived her life. In the end, I simply wish them all happiness and love.



The path to happily ever after isn't always straight and narrow, sometimes it's messy. We all make choices, as flawed beings, sometimes those choices may not seem right. At some point in our lives, we will all bare our share of shame, disappointment and weakness. That's life, and that's love.

If all marriages are unhappy and take work, then mine was no different. I stayed because I was foolish enough to believe those things were true.

CJ has found her soul-mate, but unfortunately, she was already tied to another man. CJ's account of her marriage to Levi was heartbreaking. I ached for them both, the struggle, the lack of communication, it was frustrating, and I found myself angry at times. But sometimes we marry the wrong person, we fall in and out of love. People lie, and they cheat, but at the bottom of it all, most of us just searching for a bit of happiness.

I wanted that. I wanted to find someone who belonged with me like the stars belonged with the sky. Someone I could get lost in, who would make me forget about reality for a while, who would adore me second to none.

I can't imagine exposing myself the way CJ has, writing her story, opening herself up to the judgement of others. It's brave. I don't read a lot of non-fiction, so this review was somewhat difficult to write. How do you rate someone's love story? I'm not sure you can. While the journey may have been messy, the outcome, CJ and Grant's love for each other, is beautiful, and there is no shame in that. I'm glad they found each other. The writing was wonderful, and the story has a slow building pace, filled with honesty and passion, that kept me turning the page.



*This story does contain cheating.

*Copy provided by C.J. English in exchange for an honest review*

[Katy Loves Romance ❤️ · Rating 5 out of 5]

5 Consuming gripping yet Beautiful stars*****

First of all I just want to say how awed I am by this author not only because this is her first book but because she has given us something special she's put her heart and soul into this book. This isn't a fiction Novel it's A.Memoir, it's her life it's her experience its raw, intense and had me gripped at the edge of my seat and reading at all hours to see where it was going and how frankly she became who she is today.




This is C.J and Grants story and although it is an Affair (for me) it didn't feel wrong nor much of an affair as I connected to both and saw C.J's struggles at the beginning, it didn't phase me if your worried about Angst I really honesty don't think you need to worry here again just My point of view.


What's it about
Don't when young want love? we want to feel cherished, savoured and loved. We want to find that special person yet you can rush into something which isn't right because you want a family and you want to be happy, sometimes those aspects make us miserable.

C.J was young and she wanted to find the one except she wanted to do what was right in turn she ended up with someone that took a lot of work again love isn't always easy it takes time and work and as a woman I think we can do what we think is right for the people around us therefore C.J settled with someone she wasn't necessarily in love with but just liked. I sympathised.

Except as time went by she knew she wasn't happy.



This spans of a period of time where she fell for the man of her dreams and when she caught sight of Grant she knew he was meant to be hers. Ultimately this is a story about how they met, how they fell and how they became each others Forevers.



What I enjoyed and immersed myself in was how natural and real this story was, how you can find something you find yourself in well it was like that for me. It can't be easy to tell the world your secrets and how you felt through periods of hate, resentment and heartbreak yet she did C.J poured her heart and soul into her life and shared it with us honestly I had tears with just that, she really is a special lady for that.

Love shouldn't be hard though even though at times you have to work at it, it shouldn't be hard that person is the person you call in the day that person is the person you reach out to when your down and that person is the one you should trust and let in 110% and C.J knew it wasn't right with her 'currant' husband she knew she struggled and they she hoped for more she hoped for a future she wanted love, everyone should have that chance. We don't want to be alone it's scary and it's not nice I can also sympathise with that, it's a very lonely world when your husband is the one person you can't talk to and speak your honest mind.



Our loves should be the one person that pushes us to do what we want to do, they should just support your decisions to become and be happy. Grant was that for C.J this was their story and how that came about, I can't express enough how inspiring both C.J and Grant are they inspired me to take courage and make things happen in our life if we so choose to. It wasn't just a love story but a story about making the right choices and not to always do what she think is right. The thing is, doing what's right isn't always right for you that's something I've learnt over time and this read made me love how courageous C.J was by doing what's right for her, to do what made her happy and quench the choice she ran with.



Above all this was a delight to read, it was heaven and it was joy. I could connect to the author and her love and I could understand her, she spoke to my heart on so many levels. It was so normal and Real. Her writing is so poetic honest and as a debut author it was detailed in the most easiest way possible.


A little bit about me
I'm just going to express a little bit about me, I think that most readers can relate to some aspect of this story the first few years of my marriage were hard and I laughed when C.J wanted to murder her husband I could see myself in that scenario at times (Alls good now) but it took a little time at the beginning, I have come from a step family and my husband was married before I came along. So I suppose for me I was able to connect on a deep level to the FairyTale that it was. Love should be easy and this book was just that. I applaud C.J for giving us her and Grant.




Give it a chance you won't regret it!!!

A big thank you to Allison for encouraging me to read it...


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Link to Allisons Review
Link to Flos Review
Link to Stephanies Review
Link to Kims Review

ARC kindly received in exchange for an honest review

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[✰ Liz ✰ · Rating 5 out of 5]

"My love, you were so worth the wait."



Affairytale is a unique read exposing the the ugliness of a broken relationship and the transformation of one woman who found her true love before it was too late. In reality, I am not a fan of books with cheating. Being a married woman myself, I don't want to question my own marriage. I don't want to expose the cracks that surface when times are difficult. I don't want to experience the anxiety of what if or why not? And yet, as I fearfully made my way through this read, I found admiration for a woman who never stopped fighting for herself. I found courage in the knowledge that I am exactly where I am meant to be. And as I finished this read and snuggled closer to my husband, I found peace in his arms.

"Emotionally exhausted and on the brink of a meltdown, I was a felony disaster."-C.J.

C.J. married her husband Levi when she was very young. Together they had a beautiful daughter but not a beautiful marriage. Although C.J. felt like she was doing the right thing by committing to the father of her daughter, the reality is they were toxic to each other.

"The resentment ate at me from the inside, callousing my heart and turning me into someone I was not."-C.J.

They each brought out the worst in one another. C.J. always felt a magnetic connection to her brother's best friend Grant. Despite her best efforts to stay away, eventually C.J. and Grant recognized their need to be together.

"A spark ignited inside of me that night which could never be extinguished."-C.J.



As the ugliness between C.J. and her husband continues to build, the solace she finds in Grant intensifies. C.J. has to make the choice. Does she stay with her husband or follow her heart? What will people think of her? What about her little girl? What about Grant?

"We were perfect for each other in that way, too cowardly to leave, too selfish to change, yet too wounded to be happy."-C.J.

As C.J. matures, she discovers what she has known in her heart all along. She has an internal battle with herself over making a decision that will change the course of many lives. She experiences guilt, shame, joy, passion, pain, peace, and everything in between.



"Levi was the man I couldn't live with, and Grant was the man I couldn't live without."-C.J.

Affairytale catalogs years of C.J.'s life. We experience the highs and lows of every hill and valley she lives through. The emotional turmoil leaves her shattered. The pain cuts deep to your gut as you long for her and Grant to find a way to be together. Told in first person POV, the description of each emotion is colored brilliantly throughout the text. The clever usage of real text messages and journal entries in the text only intensifies the experience of this read. These are not characters in a fictional book. These are real people. This is my neighbor. This is the woman in line next to me at the grocery store. This is me. This is real.



"I needed him in my life like I needed air to breathe."-C.J.

Overall, Affairytale is a must read! The minute I began this journey with C.J., I made a commitment to myself to feel deeply and open my heart to this beautiful "real life" love story. What did I discover? Everyone deserves to be loved unconditionally. It's never too late to find joy in your life. Sometimes people get hurt and that's just the way it goes. When the hurt fades away, joy remains. Unsurmountable joy!

"Everyone gets a do-over."-C.J. English

I simply cannot rave enough about this book. This is a must read! Ms. English, I applaud your bravery and willingness to share your story with the world. You have truly moved me! Your story will be with me forever!

~This was a BR with my Shh... sisters in honor of the amazing IndieSTAR chat with Leighton, French, James & English!
https://www.goodreads.com/topic/show/...



~ARC graciously provided via author in exchange for an honest review!~

For more reviews/reveals/giveaways visit:

[warhawke · Rating 5 out of 5]

Genre: Memoir
Type: Standalone
POV: First Person - Female
Rating:





C.J. started dating Levi when she was quite young. After a few years of being together and sharing something precious, they took the leap and tied the knot. However, marriage wasn’t as a fairytale as she thought it would be especially when her attention redirected to Grant who has been in her life since the beginning. Sometimes the path to true love is a long winding journey.



This is the second memoir I’ve read. Both were scandalous in nature, but after the disappointment in the first one, I’m glad to see that memoirs can be entertaining and emotional as I prefer them to be.

I’d been starving, desperate for emotional love, begging for it like a dog begs for crumbs. Now what I felt with Grant illuminated just how lonely and isolated I’d been in my marriage.

What I love the most about C.J. is how she didn’t put herself on a pedestal. She took credit where it’s due, but she also took the blame equally. I love to read about flawed characters because it’s what made them human – and in this case, real.



Grant on the other hand was a different matter. At times, I thought he was some kind of unicorn – so surreal and untouchable – the perfect embodiment of a male species. It felt weird/wrong to swoon over a real, living, breathing character haha!

He didn’t deserve a cheating, abusive, neglectful wife, but as hard as I tried, I couldn’t be anything but those things for him.

All the rainbow farting unicorn chasers might not even give Levi a glance but for me he was one of the most interesting one. He was the one I felt hurt for the most. I could just feel his anger and frustration.

Some of my favorite elements in this book is the inclusion of personal text messages and letters. I thought it was a great way to get readers feel like they’re part of the story. One of my favorite scene was the flying scene which was exhilarating.

It was enchanting—the idea that there might really be one true somebody for everybody.

Affairytale chronicled C.J. and Grant’s journey to happiness. It was a long and arduous one and no matter what mistake/indiscretion they made, you’d want to root for them.

★ ★ ★ (F)BR With The Shhluts ★ ★ ★
Read as part of #ShhIndieSTARchat Nov: https://goo.gl/ESA9lM





For more reviews/reveals/giveaways visit:

[Sharon ∞❥ is an emotional book junkie ❥∞ · Rating 3 out of 5]

3 - 3.5 ★'s

Well, I've written this review a few different ways so far and each time either I'm finding out new information or I'm just trying to find the right balance for reviewing a book where a main character is also the author.

My first reactions were not good ones. I wasn't exactly angry but I didn't like the way the author portrayed Levi, her first husband. My main issue was their meanness toward each other and how it affected the story. The other issue is that he wasn't even aware of the story until after it was written. The author explains things a little here:

https://www.goodreads.com/questions/4...

And my reaction to that is...this would have been a much better LOVE story without reading the extent of their hatred for each other. Why not just say you weren't in love with Levi and it degraded to a level where you couldn't stand being around each other? Same picture, better intensity.

On to Grant...I feel this is where the author should've focused her attention. I would have liked to know more about Grant, her and Grant, and Grant and her family and friends.



Of course, I'm having a hard time believing all their interactions are as innocent as they were made out to be but all the same, I was happy they were finally spending some time together.

And at least the ending after Hawaii was good. I'm glad she got her fairy tale.

Overall, I think the Grant and C.J. story was interesting, I just wish there was less about her and Levi. It cast a l-o-n-g shadow on the love story.



Favorite quote:

♥ “LIFE IS NOT A FAIRY TALE.

IF YOU LOSE YOUR SHOE AT MIDNIGHT,

YOU’RE DRUNK.”

—UNKNOWN


♦ BR w/Melissa & Patty!

[Kim Bailey · Rating 5 out of 5]

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Summer or winter, Grant or Levi, risk it or save it ...

This is more than a mere memoir. This is a captivating and tender love story.

C.J. English delivers a critical and brutally honest account of how she fell in love with the man of her dreams, while married to the father of her child. It's a story of misery and heartache. It's a story of destiny and soulmates.

I can't imagine it being easy to disclose the private details of one's life. Especially when those details could be considered objectionable. It's easy to judge others, but analyzing our own behavior is a much more difficult task. Finding the courage to admit our faults and to take ownership of our actions ... probably the hardest thing of all. It's a big risk to put yourself on display. C.J. English not only takes the risk, she tackles it with flair. And the result ... a risk totally worth taking.

The amazing thing about this book, is how simply I could connect to the author. She voices thoughts I would never dream of saying aloud, but I imagine many of us have experienced in a relationship. The imagery and elegance of her writing is quite remarkable ... I had to remind myself (a few times) that I was reading a memoir, not a fictional romance. The emotional pull of the narrative left me in a place of pure bliss. And the love story ... because, trust me, it is an amazing love story ... really is like a wonderful work of fiction. So romantic. So beautiful in it's purity. It's the type of love many only dream about.

Lots of risks were taken in the making of this story ... reading it, however ... no risk at all. Wonderfully worthwhile.



*A copy of this book was generously provided by the author in exchange for an honest review.*

[* Meli Mel * · Rating 4 out of 5]

♥ ♥ ♥ 4 STARS ♥ ♥ ♥

●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●

“I ached for red silk romance, and carry me away passion, and I ached for it with nobody else but him. He was a breed of charming I couldn't resist.”

●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●

I've not read many non-fiction books, as you can probably tell. But the moment this book was put on my radar and I read the blurb--thanks to Allison--I became intrigued by this book. And the fact that this was a real romance, I had to dive into it. This is about a real life woman finding her happily ever after. It may have not been right at times, or easy to read, but it was beautiful in the fact that it was honest.

●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●

“He filled my longing, he erased the emptiness. A lifetime of incompleteness over. All of the things I had tried to fill myself with: religion, food, work, men, it was none of those---it was him I had been waiting for him.”

●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●

The first part of the book was a tad slow for me, because it starts off with C.J. and her boyfriend Levi together. It shows them on their road to getting married and how their lives turned out after they tied the knot. C.J. gives birth to a little girl, which seems to cement her idea that she is to be with Levi. However, she has never fully believed it no matter how much she told herself she did. Once, Grant comes into the picture that is when things became a bit more interesting. But, I did struggle to connect with him at first because there wasn't much on how he felt about C.J. Instead we get a retelling of everything that ran through C.J.'s mind when this handsome man showed up in her life. And it was really interesting.

●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●

“I craved him. I needed him. I was myself when I was with him. I had married the wrong person, therefore I’d become the wrong person. No ironically, I was having an affair that was turning me into the right person.”

●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●

When things between C.J. and Levi deteriorated and was at a real low, I couldn't help but cringe and feel so uncomfortable with the words they both exchanged. I felt bad for both sides and could sympathize with them. It's hard not to judge C.J's behaviour towards her husband. But, I got to say it also amazed me that this woman was so willing to show all sides of herself. The good and the bad, and that she is just human and not perfect. It seemed crazy to do such a thing. But again, this is what appealed to me about this book, its honesty and realness. I hope, just like C.J., that Levi finds his happily ever after too. I also hope that C.J.'s back is doing much better now.

●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●

“Life keeps bringing us together,” I said. “Even when I tried to get away from you, I couldn't.”

“I knew we were meant to be,” he said, “I've just been waiting for you to get free.”

●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●  ●

When a relationship began to form between C.J. and Grant, that is when I became hooked. Because we got to see a little more as to who Grant is as a person. This man was really sweet, patient, and kind. It was crazy to think that these two people shared such a deep connection and for so many years. They were undeniably drawn to each other and that just fascinated me, watching them fall in love. Their love was truly wonderful and romantic. I was happy with the sweet ending. I really liked the lyrical writing style of this book, you wouldn't know it was her debut. C.J. is a brave woman for sharing her raw story and opening up completely about her life. I loved the message she conveyed at the end, that one should not settle and that you should find your happiness with your "The One". I also liked that she accepted her wrongs and didn't make excuses for what happened. Overall, it was a great read. It's something that I won't be forgetting about any time soon, and something that is definitely worth reading.




P.S. Thank you, Allison!! For the awesome recommendation! ;D


~ARC was kindly given in exchange for an honest review.~

[Dee Montoya · Rating 5 out of 5]

*****FIVE STARS******

(Arc Kindly provided by author in exchange for an honest review)



With zero expectations and an open mind I decided to delve into the pages of this story. This is a non-fiction book; the memoir of a woman who decided to share the story of her affair with the world. She wrote it with a naked heart, beautiful and yet completely heartbreaking. The story about how she met the love of her life when she was engaged to be married to another.

C.J had a man in her life; the father of her daughter. They've been engaged for a few years but hadn't taken the plunge maybe because she had a feeling something in her relationship wasn't right. They were always arguing and often the fights would get dirty but they always would find a way to make up and keep going. Everybody fights, right? Nobody has the perfect relationship, was always her reasoning whenever the feeling of inadequacy will creep up between her and her partner. Until one day she found herself in front of a man who within minutes of meeting him, he completely took her breath away.

Grant was her brother's new friend; he was handsome, funny, talented and completely charming, all the men wanted to be friends with him and all the women wanted to date him. C.J and Grant organically developed an important friendship that was easy and would always enveloped them in a world where only they existed. Years would go by and this friendship only grew stronger; they realized they have been able to find in each other something unique and that only the other one could provide but that it was also forbidden.

C.J married the father of her child and Grant went on as the picky bachelor all the girls wanted but he could never really settle down with anybody. Every summer all the friends and family would gather at the lake, making beautiful memories but C.J could hardly manage being in the same room as Grant, the pull they both felt from the attraction and the feelings between them was too much, until one night nothing could longer keep them apart.



I consider myself a very open minded person but I don't condone cheating in any way, yet reading about it in this book didn't feel wrong, it felt like if I was in my kitchen listening to a friend tell me about her struggles with love, over a glass of wine. The writing style of C.J English was so beautiful, almost lyrical, so much so, even though is a memoir it reads like fiction, a heartbreaking love story where two people find each other but can't really be together. The story is constructed over the course of about ten years and we learn about C.J's success in her career, her insecurities due to her severe back health problems and the decay of her marriage. What we get is the bared all story of a woman, who like the rest of us is not perfect and tried her best to do what was right but in the end, you can't really help who you love. She had to pay a painful price to get on the right road towards her happiness but when it comes to real love, every tear is worth it.

Is hard to review a story where all the characters are real and the plot isn't made up in the head of a clever writer. I'm nobody to judge the choices this woman made but what I can do, is what I do with every book I read and that is appreciate and enjoy the story as well as try to find something constructive that will inspire me in my own life and C.J's story gave me something wonderful and I hope that everyone who reads it can appreciate and understand that when it comes to love we are all just powerless creatures.



My Affairytale Music Playlist:
*Sweet Disposition by The Temper Trap
*Love Me Tender by Elvis Presley
*Stay (Cover)by Daniela Andrade
*Can't Help Falling In Love by Ingrid Michaelson
*Somewhere Only we Know by Lily Allen
*Us Against The World (Cover) by Daniela Andrade

[MELISSA *Mel Reader* · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 You Were Worth The Wait Stars!
(BR with Patty & Sharon)

I wanted to find someone who belonged with me like the stars belonged with the sky.





This is the memoir of a woman named C.J. Summers who wanted the fairytale, and to find the one. She starts dating a cute guy named Levi, & after they have a child together, she agrees to marry him hoping he is her happily ever after. She doesn't want to be alone & felt he could make her happy. She also wants to give her daughter a family. In my opinion this was where her life took a wrong turn. She settled & married Mr. Right Now instead of waiting for the man of her dreams. She didn't know she had already crossed paths with her soul mate.



C.J.'s family has a lake house, & she meets a beautiful, charming neighbor named Grant. She is instantly smitten with him & feels an excitement in her life that was missing. C.J. & Grant's friendship grows & they become emotionally connected to one another. Through the years they flirt & desire one another, but don't act on it. C.J. feels guilty for wanting another man, but doesn't want to give up on her marriage. Over the years she begins to resent her husband as she stays with him, & is miserable. As her obsession with Grant grows, she becomes cold towards Levi. Her time with Grant becomes her escape from her dysfunctional marriage. She falls deeply in love with Grant & is only truly happy when they're together. Through the years they share stolen moments until they finally can't take not being together any longer.



-He was the one.

-He felt more familiar than anything I'd ever known.

-I needed him in my life like I needed air to breath.

-I believed in fate, in destiny, and I believed that he was mine.



I had so many mixed feelings about this book. It wasn't about the cheating. I've read plenty of books with cheating that didn't bother me. From the moment Grant enters the picture it was clear to me he was the one for C.J. He is her meant to be. I loved Grant & wanted them together. He was the one who had C.J's heart. What affected my enjoyment of the book was how C.J. treated Levi. It broke my heart how she talked to him, & I never understood her hatred for him, when he seemed to love her & was clueless to why she didn't want him. Levi had his jerk moments, but for the most part I felt his behavior was a reflection of C.J.'s. I felt like their marriage was over when she met Grant, & I didn't understand why she stayed with Levi, & kept hoping she would set him free. At the same time I know marriage is hard work, we all make mistakes, & I haven't walked in her shoes & all that. I also know a lot of people marry Mr. Right Now, cause they don't know if they will ever find "the one". In the end I'm glad C.J. & Grant got their HEA & I'm hoping Levi has found happiness too.

[Beverly · Rating 5 out of 5]

"I wish we could have been together in a different lifetime, I have a feeling we would have been really amazing."

ONE CLICK-> http://amzn.to/1HmMn4y

So, I have this best friend, this girl knows my every thought. I mean if it passes into my head it usually goes out to her in a matter of minutes. See, she is my person, I trust her explicitly. She knows the good, the bad and the ugly of Beverly. She knows Beverly is crazy funny, but also gets super sad about certain things. She knows how I feel about any subject, including my marriage. She is the holder of my secrets and there is only one of her.

CJ English did something this girl would never do, she wrote a memoir about one of the ugliest times of her life. She documents falling in love with the man of her dreams, only to marry another man. She tells the world her secrets, it’s not pretty, but damn it’s so real and I loved every freaking minute of it.

Affairytale tells the story of a girl who wanted to be loved, so she decided to settle instead of waiting for her true love. CJ was a young girl when she met Levi. From the beginning she recognized that Levi was probably only temporary in her life, but when she got pregnant with daughter things became more permanent. Her relationship with Levi was never easy, they just weren’t compatible as adults.

This memoir takes you on a journey of heartbreak as CJ meets Grant, the man of her dreams. It doesn’t glamorize an affair or the people involved. Honestly, it’s pretty ugly at times. CJ shows parts of herself that I would like to forget even exist in me, but in doing so it allowed me to connect with her. I felt a kinship towards CJ as I read her feelings. She was neurotic and desperate at times, but I could feel her pain. I would die if people knew my crazy thoughts when dating my husband, I was a complete mess. As my friend says: Love will fuck you up!

I don’t know CJ personally, but I admire her. You can judge her or hate her, but the not very many people have the strength to change the course of their lives, to go against the grain. More than that, most people don’t have the guts to layout a piece of themselves for others to judge. I love how this woman admits her faults and mistakes, owns them and apologizes.

My favorite part was how I could feel CJ’s love for Grant. It wasn’t about him being gorgeous, no this woman loves every part of him. She reveres him and thinks he is the best man on Earth. Then we have Grant, this guy who waited on her, who thought she was worth the wait. Honestly, the thought of them not being together breaks my freaking heart.

In closing, this book will pull you in immediately and completely own you. You will become engrossed in the life of CJ and in the end be cheering her bravery. I read romance books for the HEA, but reading a person’s real life HEA was EPIC to me. I loved their text messages, emails, and hidden moments. If you are looking for something, MORE, then you need to read this. HIGHLY RECOMMEND!

ARC kindly provided in exchange for an honest review.

[Sandy ღCoffee Addict Booksღ]

*NO RATING*

Didn’t rate this book not because I hated it but I don’t know how I feel about this book, I’m going through so many mixed emotions right now and since it’s a true story I found it hard not to be judgemental.

For almost first half of the story I never understood C.J and her actions, it’s not the affair which bothered but the way she treated Levi or her feelings towards him was what I couldn’t stand. I get it, they were in a loveless marriage and to make it work was almost impossible, but I wish I knew why did she hate Levi so much when she was the abusive one? I came close to giving up on this book several times but then I realised this is not a fiction, but somebody’s real life story and if she had enough balls to put it out there for an entire world to know her story, can’t I muster enough patience to finish it?!

It’s easy to point out at somebody’s mistake but we never really put ourselves in their shoes and just for a moment think why they did, what they did? and I’m glad I stuck with it till the end, I understand her reasons better which wouldn’t be possible If it was not for her detailed writing and if she didn’t bare her soul with such honesty.

I’m not going into the details of her story but I want to say this,

C.J, if you are reading this:

Thank you for sharing your story with us, it takes so much courage to confess your mistakes and accept your failures. You weren’t perfect and you didn’t try to cover it up, in some ways most of us could relate to you and your conflicts. And finally thank you for showing us that chasing after something you want isn’t a bad thing.

I’m glad you found your fairy tale with the man of your dreams and I hope Levi does too.

[~Stéphanie~ · Rating 5 out of 5]

EPIC BLOG-HOP GIVEAWAY - Click on the pix to be redirected ;)




Affairytale is probably a story you only read once in a lifetime.
Thanks to the amazing review of my friend, Flo, I had the chance to read a unique love story.

I also wanted to thank my dear friend Allison for contacting me because without you, I wouldn't have spent my entire week end in company of such a life-changing story.



Affairytale is not a fiction, it's a real story .
C.J, the heroine is a real living person and for me, the way I approach this book was totally different from others. I find it so humble of her to share her thoughts, her experiences, her difficulties, her doubts. She completely trusts the readers with her book. She bared herself and she never hides behind false pretenses.
The way she tells her story is how she lived it, how she felt it and how she remembered it.

I asked myself how I could really give my opinion on her book.
When I write a review, it's all fictional. Mostly, the characters don't exist but here they are all real, they are all alive.
And that's the beauty of it. That's what makes it so special.


Art taken from author's pinterest page

If you've read the blurb you already know that Affairytale is not a traditional love story BUT it's not what you think either

C.J. English embark us in a journey, in her life. We got back to twelve years to fully understand from where she comes to where she is now.

As a nineteen years old girl, C.J. is in search of what her life is going to be. What choices does she has to make to be happy. Because it's that simple. Happiness is within everyone's reach and everyone has to make the right decisions to make it happen.



Still who can think that it's so easy? C.J certainly thought she was doing what was suppose to be done – for her, for her family, for her daughter, she married the wrong man.

There's one thing that touched me a lot in her story. It's the thought to be alone. I can totally relate to the feeling you don't want to handle, that I don't want to handle.
I think that's what suck me in right away. I connect immediately with her way of thinking, with her fear, with her apprehension.


Art taken from author's pinterest page

When reading I asked myself a lot what would I have done?
When you meet your soulmate a little too late, when your life is already on the move, do you stop everything and throw everything away to take a chance?
In books, you do it without a doubt. But in real life? I'm not so sure...
When C.J. met Grant, she is not happy. She already had doubts about what to do with her life. Both of them are getting closer, become friends, great friends. And they never cross a line.

“Do you think marriage can be fun and easy?”
“I think so. If you wait for the right person, be picky and don’t settle.”
“So that’s what you’re doing?” He shrugged, “I guess.”
“Is there someone you have in mind?” A shy smile grew on his face. “Maybe?”

For those who are scared about cheating, for those who doesn't like cheating, I want to be perfectly clear: This book is not about that.
Did you paid attention to the title? A ffairy tale.
I know I didn't write it correctly but put this way, it makes perfect sense.


Art taken from author's pinterest page

I can't imagine how hard it was for the author to put her feelings into words. She let the readers know everything about her. Her writing was unconditionally spellbinding. Be prepare to laugh, to swoon, to cry (a lot), to worry... in one word : to feel

You'll be consumed by all the love C.J. and Grant have for each other.
Discover how two friends fought against their nature to do what's right or what's supposed to be right.

Let them convince you that you can fight all you want, when true love is there, there's no chance in denying it. You only have to let it in and welcome it

“Sometimes I feel like you’re still holding back. I mean, I understand why you would be, but… I feel like there’s so much more to us than we talk about; I feel like we have something that most people only dream of but never get to experience. Do you feel that way too?”
“C.J.,” he said quietly, “I feel it. Trust me, I feel it. And I’ll keep showing you if you let me. I won’t hold back anymore.”

Link to Flo's review ♥
Link to Allison's review ♥

[Jenny - TotallybookedBlog · Rating 4 out of 5]

“I had a feeling it was you.”

You guys know that we will read anything and everything as long as it has romance. Nothing really deters us from picking a book up. This story could have scared us off, after all, we often read about cheating in books yet this is a true account; A Memoir.

We found ourselves riveted; after all we could be classed as cheeky voyeurs of CJ and Grant’s love affair. Sceptical, as in would someone really bare their souls in this manner and invite vilification into their lives? Intrigued because of this very fact. Mortified as we found behaviours and actions quite disturbing and vindictive. Yet at the same time we absolutely revelled in the beautiful enduring love of soul mates. This Author can truly write.

‘I’d been longing for him like a lost soul longs to go home. He was my Home, my place of refuge that I always longed to go back to.’

How do you review a story based on the true life experiences of the Author herself? If we didn’t enjoy it – if we didn’t like the characters – are we not passing judgement and reviewing the very people involved in the story? Would it feel as if we are judging and sentencing these people for taking a path, a journey if you will that we disparage of? We had to ask ourselves this very question as we read, thinking how the hell do we review this book? Well, we decided to review it as we would any other book – honestly and impartially! Once you send your words out in the world for everyone to read you have to accept an opinion; come what may. It is what it is – the nature of the beast.

‘I ached for red silk romance, and carry me away passion, and I ached for it with nobody else but him. He was a breed of charming I couldn’t resist.’

When you read a true to life account from the voice of woman in love with a man, who’s not her husband, you feel sad at an opportunity lost. How could you not when the very essence of love is denied and your soul mate is unreachable yet a constant presence in your life? Is emotional cheating and betrayal on par with the act of physical cheating? There’s many arguments for and against of this very question.

“I guess this is how it feels when two people find true love.”

Affairytale is not one of those reads where you ever feel truly comfortable as you read. Though we have to say the romance is heartfelt and overwhelmingly real and honest in its emotional love. CJ made it harder at times for us to settle in; what with her behaviour and actions towards Levi, her husband whilst struggling with the intensity of her emotions towards and for Grant.

As we read this memoir the overpowering experience as readers were the emotions and thoughts of CJ. We do not see or experience any intrinsic evidence nor a balance and equal behaviour patterns nor actions overall. This enhances the inability to avoid forming opinions and passing judgements under certain circumstances. Perhaps, in some respects this portrayal of events were somewhat too one sided – yes CJ is under no illusion of who she paints herself to be – she bares her very being. However; in order to see past the fundamentals of adultery – we as readers perhaps needed to experience a more level pegging and see for ourselves in order to fully understand the aggressive behaviour. A woman scorned and kept away from what she truly believes is the love of her life – her soul – is one powerful Lady.

‘I wanted that. I wanted to find someone who belonged with me like the stars belonged with the sky. Someone I could get lost in, who would make me forget about reality for a while, who would adore me second to none.’

How could you possibly question the overwhelming love and passion for who is clearly your soul mate? You can’t – how you deal is an entirely different scenario. We found this to be an extremely addictive and un-putdown-able recounting of a love affair that was meant to be, written in the stars. A love that is almost obsessive, consuming and inherently true above all. The forever kind of love. Affairytale is brave – selfish – questionable – yet pure romance wrapped up in an ugly package that somehow managed to be beautiful in its honesty.

“Is this for real?”

“It is for me.”

**Reviewed from an ARC copy provided by the author, with thanks.
Some photos used in collage used by permission of CJ and Grant English, with thanks.**




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[Kelli C · Rating 4 out of 5]

4 Right Man, Wrong Time Stars

This is one of those reads that makes me sit and think...makes me struggle to review. This story is a staggering look into a true blown affair, focused not on cheating per se, but more of a complete emotional journey to another man. Told in fragmented pieces of passing past and present times, written memories in a journal, and text messages between a man a woman, Affairytale is as emotionally awkward to read as it is to imagine.

This is a memoir of sorts of the complex love life of C.J - Charmaine (Summers) English. This woman found comfort in a "relationship" at a young age. She was in a safe relationship with her first love Levi. This was a total case of wrong man...wrong time...wrong everything. Together because...well, that is what was expected. NOTHING was wrong with this love but NOTHING was right either.

It was not shock that a very single and sexy Grant would catch her eye. Over 12 years, freedom was found on a lake with a man who was fun...witty...and a bit challenging. A breath of fresh air from her mundane life would turn into a steady stream of hot air encompassing her lungs. Every moment with Grant pushed her further away from her marriage, but never truly into the arms of another man.

This book pushed my hard limits, a lot! While I cannot begrudge anyone for truly wanting more...knowing that they need something else...I still cannot connect with CJ. Her anger and her behavior toward an unsuspecting husband was beyond harsh. I found myself cursing at the woman to just walk away...to say something more than hate...to ultimately shut up! I suppose I fell into the wizardry writing of the author because I found all the tension to be quite palpable and addictive.

Here comes the crazy!

Did I like the story? Not really, but then again it wasn't mine to tell or own.

Did I like the characters? No. CJ and I would have never been friends and Grant seemed off to me...hot but cold, distant but there...perhaps his lack of POV made him seem almost like a figment of her imagination. Don't even get me started on his "love you forever notes." Again, this is the genius of the author creating such stark contrast between an average Levi, the status quo, and Grant the romantic enigma of man. His words, his actions were so over the top...I felt like I was in the midst of a first love. He felt imaginary at times.

So why the high rating? The writing was poetic and quite riveting. The author pulled emotions from me and made me think hours after finishing. The story was so candid and so open. Every emotional insecurity, every giddy lust filled moment, and every frustrated and fury filled fight and then passionate moment or let down consumed me. I don't think there is a woman out there who hasn't thought, even if for a passing moment, what if? or is he the one? Not everyone is brave enough to find their forever at the expense of an already established family. Kudos to C.J for not only finding her RIGHT forever, but for having the gumption to tell the sordid story along the way!

***Be Brave and take a chance...This is one of those reads you SHOULD read. You wont have to like it but it will make you take a breath and take pause. It was worth the stress!!!***

[April · Rating 4 out of 5]

True Love always finds a way.
Sometimes...it starts with an affair.

My thoughts on this story:


I'm still stunned that I'm not sure how to review this, but I will say that this is such a brutally open and honest story!



You know....... life is NOT easy and sometimes there are decisions that need to be made; and sometimes those decisions may not be the right ones (in your eyes,) but for that person, it may just be the BEST decision she/he ever made!

This story is: REAL; HONEST; RAW; Heart breaking; Unapologetic, and one of my best reads of 2015!!!

Thank you C.J. for this story! I can't even imagine what you've gone through but I am so extremely happy that YOU, "did for you"!!!

For more Reviews, Free E-books and Giveaways

[Deanna❤Pink Lady❤️]

DNF- it is clearly the case of me and not the book as so many have loved. I wish the author much success and please refer to the many other reviews listed.

[✦ Ellen’s Reviews ✦ · Rating 5 out of 5]

I absolutely fell in love with this book and the characters. This is a very adult, very difficult story and is certainly not for everyone; it is painfully real, messy and passionate and I loved every single word.

I wanted to find someone who belonged with me like the stars belonged with the sky. Someone I could get lost in, who would make me forget about reality for a while, who would adore me second to none.

Affairytale is a book that fascinated me, at times made me cringe, enthralled me and in the end, captivated me with its realism, beauty and ultimately very hopeful message. This is the non-fiction account of the author meeting her soulmate, while promised to another. C.J. actually meets Grant, the great love of her life, before she marries Levi, the father of her child. She knows in her heart of hearts that Levi is not the right man for her, but he was a good father and she wanted to make a home for their child.

I craved him. I needed him, I was myself when I was with him. I had married the wrong person, there I had become the wrong person.

This story is gripping on so many levels. The reader is a witness to the destruction of a marriage. It should have never occurred in the first place and it takes a very long time for the author to come to terms with the reality of her situation. The story takes place over many years and is much, much more than just the tale of two people destined to be together. It is an exploration of becoming the best person you can be, living each day to the fullest and living your life with honesty. That might seem out of place in a review of a book like this but events unfolded the way they were meant to, and in a way that was gritty, painful, real and finally, very uplifting and joyous.

I didn’t always agree with C.J.’s actions or her behavior toward Levi. But she and Grant were always meant to be, even if took them years to get there. Her struggle with chronic back pain, along with the realities of her brutally painful relationship with Levi, were so honest that I could not put this book down and still find myself thinking about it days after finishing.

There is no question that this story is not for everyone. But it is an honest account of two people’s path to happiness and truth and for that alone, I applaud the author for putting her story out there. The inclusion of text messages and love letters was brilliant and only added to the feelings and emotions I have for this book! If you are looking for a very challenging and very thought-provoking story, then do no miss Affairytale. It is one of my favorite books this year.

(ARC provided by the author in return for an honest review,)

[Sher❤ The Fabulous BookLover · Rating 5 out of 5]

**4.5 "Everyone Gets A Do-Over" Stars**


Wow a book hasn't made me this emotional in a long time. Such a beautiful love story filled with pain, heartache and love. I loved CJs story. It's nonfiction, but there were times when I forgot I wasn't reading a novel.

I wasn't sure how I would feel going into it this knowing that this story is about a married woman whose soulmate is not her husband. From the very beginning I was pulled in. I was torn between a lot of things. The harsh realities of a dying marriage and yet the beautiful blossoming of a love that was obviously meant to be. I was cringing at times, scared for CJ at other times. But I was rooting her and I was rooting for love. I was dying to know how it would end. Would she get her happily ever after? Does she even deserve a happily ever after everything that has happened?

Prepare for an emotional rollercoaster, an intense retelling of one womans journey of love and the risks she was willing to take.

And a big thanks to CJ for that beautiful lake pic I used in my edit!

[Sabrina · Rating 4 out of 5]

Interview with C.J English and a giveaway on my blog
http://escapetoreading.blogspot.com/2...

Do I like non-fiction books? No. Do I like cheating in my books? No. But I loved this book!


This is a story of pain, loss, and love. C.J made a mistake when she was young and that mistake resulted in a loveless marriage and feelings of hopelessness. C.J and Levi grew apart from each other but both felt obligated to stay in the relationship.

The summer that C.J met Grant there was an instant attraction and she found herself crushing on him. Thinking about him all the time and secretly hoping that their playful flirting could one day turn into more. And it did...



I was a little weary about reading this because it is the real life story of C.J's love life. So as I write this review I'm not just judging the book, in a way I'm judging her. I kept hearing how amazing the story was and that it would be worth a try but was still iffy about it. But then when C.J contacted me about reviewing it I felt like it was fates way of telling me I was meant to read this story, and I am so glad I listened.

"I wanted to find someone who belonged with me like the stars belonged with the sky."

Reading about the fights and the horrible things that were yelled back and forth between Levi and C.J was eye opening. A part of me wanted to pick a side and feel bad for one of them while hating the other, but it just wasn't possible. The marriage wasn't perfect by any means and it was a little cringe worthy to think about being so unhappy with someone that at one time you thought you would spend your life with. It amazes me that C.J was so willing to put her thoughts and words from this time on paper for everyone to read, and I have to give her props for being so courageous.

After reading this, I truly believe that Grant is C.J's soul mate. I'm a person that believes we all have that other half of us out there, and it may not be a romantic relationship we have with them, but they exist. We just can't all be as lucky as C.J and find them. Her love for Grant was like a real life fairytale, it just took a little work to get the happily ever after.

"Levi was the man I couldn't live with, and Grant was the man I couldn't live without."

Affairytale isn't just the memoirs of C.J, it's also a love story and a story that gives hope to those who need it. It shows that real love isn't as easy as books and movies and music make it out to be. You may go through heartbreak and have to jump over obstacles, but you will eventually find the one. You just have to be patient.

Personally, when I read, I do it to take me away from reality and to give me an escape when I need it. This wasn't just another work of fiction, though, yet it still managed to do the same. Only on a deeper level because I knew it was a true story and I actually liked having that knowledge while reading.

I'm going to say the clichéd thing that every reviewer has said at least once in their life - I could not put this book down! It drew me in from the second I read the prologue and I wanted to smack everyone that interrupted me while I was reading. This writing was lyrical and flows through you like a song. I can't describe it any other way than that.

I would like to just say that C.J and Grant don't actually sleep together until after C.J has moved out and left Levi. I usually hate cheating in books but I didn't have a problem with the affair in this one. I think everyone should give this book a try and not let the cheating aspect stop you.

Reader copy kindly provided by the author in exchange for an honest review.

[Anja · Rating 4 out of 5]

[Gitte TotallyBookedBlog · Rating 4 out of 5]

“I had a feeling it was you.”

You guys know that we will read anything and everything as long as it has romance. Nothing really deters us from picking a book up. This story could have scared us off, after all, we often read about cheating in books yet this is a true account; A Memoir.

We found ourselves riveted; after all we could be classed as cheeky voyeurs of CJ and Grant’s love affair. Sceptical, as in would someone really bare their souls in this manner and invite vilification into their lives? Intrigued because of this very fact. Mortified as we found behaviours and actions quite disturbing and vindictive. Yet at the same time we absolutely revelled in the beautiful enduring love of soul mates. This Author can truly write.

‘I’d been longing for him like a lost soul longs to go home. He was my Home, my place of refuge that I always longed to go back to.’

How do you review a story based on the true life experiences of the Author herself? If we didn’t enjoy it – if we didn’t like the characters – are we not passing judgement and reviewing the very people involved in the story? Would it feel as if we are judging and sentencing these people for taking a path, a journey if you will that we disparage of? We had to ask ourselves this very question as we read, thinking how the hell do we review this book? Well, we decided to review it as we would any other book – honestly and impartially! Once you send your words out in the world for everyone to read you have to accept an opinion; come what may. It is what it is – the nature of the beast.

‘I ached for red silk romance, and carry me away passion, and I ached for it with nobody else but him. He was a breed of charming I couldn’t resist.’

When you read a true to life account from the voice of woman in love with a man, who’s not her husband, you feel sad at an opportunity lost. How could you not when the very essence of love is denied and your soul mate is unreachable yet a constant presence in your life? Is emotional cheating and betrayal on par with the act of physical cheating? There’s many arguments for and against of this very question.

“I guess this is how it feels when two people find true love.”

Affairytale is not one of those reads where you ever feel truly comfortable as you read. Though we have to say the romance is heartfelt and overwhelmingly real and honest in its emotional love. CJ made it harder at times for us to settle in; what with her behaviour and actions towards Levi, her husband whilst struggling with the intensity of her emotions towards and for Grant.

As we read this memoir the overpowering experience as readers were the emotions and thoughts of CJ. We do not see or experience any intrinsic evidence nor a balance and equal behaviour patterns nor actions overall. This enhances the inability to avoid forming opinions and passing judgements under certain circumstances. Perhaps, in some respects this portrayal of events were somewhat too one sided – yes CJ is under no illusion of who she paints herself to be – she bares her very being. However; in order to see past the fundamentals of adultery – we as readers perhaps needed to experience a more level pegging and see for ourselves in order to fully understand the aggressive behaviour. A woman scorned and kept away from what she truly believes is the love of her life – her soul – is one powerful Lady.

‘I wanted that. I wanted to find someone who belonged with me like the stars belonged with the sky. Someone I could get lost in, who would make me forget about reality for a while, who would adore me second to none.’

How could you possibly question the overwhelming love and passion for who is clearly your soul mate? You can’t – how you deal is an entirely different scenario. We found this to be an extremely addictive and un-putdown-able recounting of a love affair that was meant to be, written in the stars. A love that is almost obsessive, consuming and inherently true above all. The forever kind of love. Affairytale is brave – selfish – questionable – yet pure romance wrapped up in an ugly package that somehow managed to be beautiful in its honesty.

“Is this for real?”

“It is for me.”

**Reviewed from an ARC copy provided by the author, with thanks & Photos of the couple with thanks**




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[Kay (❦ ᴗ ❦ ✿) BooksandMe · Rating 5 out of 5]

“I was forever under his spell and I never wanted to be without him, ever again. And if being with him, like this, turned out to be a mistake, it would be the best mistake I’d ever make.”

I often pick a book because my friends have read it, the cover talked me to it, it was my to-go-to Author, I’ve read an excerpt and I was compelled, or just because I want to do some cherry popping. I don’t really do journals or memoirs. I’ve read true stories but mostly, they were written in a way that it seems like it’s a fiction closed to reality. But when this book was offered for an ARC, I took the plunge because of its subject. Affair is a matter that happens everywhere and yet, nobody wanted to talk about. For an Author to take the chance of writing her life with this subject, is something that intrigued me and made me want to see how that reality worked for her.



I like how this was written in such a compelling way that once I started, I never wanted to stop. I love how certain points in life was highlighted. I think, most importantly is that it wasn’t written in a chronological order. It was more of looking back at your life and thinking forward of the future for me. My usual question every time I read is that: “why a particular story happens only at this point of life in that person?” but this book just showed me that every actions we had done may have unravel some thread in changing the direction of where our life may take us.

“Forget about the arguments, everybody argues, if I could be so smitten with another man almost immediately then maybe I was with the wrong person.”

This book is more of a reality check for me more than ever. It made me think of where I am in my life and the events that happened to me. It was like making me evaluate my life and my choices in my relationships. More importantly, I thought about the mistakes I’ve done and think about them if I’ve regretted any of it.

“I was an infinitesimal speck in the universe, and I felt it. Yet somehow with him, my insignificance was bearable.”

It’s funny how I read fiction books and dream about that one great love, the other half of my soul, that all-consuming love you think you will never get. And here is this story about this rare great love and yet the circumstances were preventing them to enjoy the love they had for each other.

The thing that I admired the most about CJ is that she knew herself, she knew what she wants, and the confidence that she exudes. For me she is brave, to take that life for her daughter and know that she shouldn’t endure just because she made a mistake. The ability to be independent and know that she had to do things by herself.

“Forget about the arguments, everybody argues, if I could be so smitten with another man almost immediately then maybe I was with the wrong person.”

It’s human nature to be attracted to another, but like she said, if your committed with someone, body and soul, that person is the only thing that matters to you and that even if there are beautiful people you met along the way, a stray thought should never happen. For a jaded soul like me, she made me believe that the fictional BBF I had could be real as long as we are ready for the adventure of our life.


I was in love with Grant from the get go. I’ve noticed all the imperfections and the perfection the Author had pointed out and yet I can’t help myself to long for a Grant of my own. I think the most attractive attribute he had was his sweetness. Ah, your real life Prince Charming. And in a world where gentlemen are rare, and that faithfulness is on the verge of extinction, it’s great to know that a certain Grant exist in this reality.

CJ was like a reflection of the female species. Acts irrational and immature at times, never meant to be understood, just accepted. Some may think that in the way she wrote her book, she was justifying why she cheated in the first place, but for me it was actually more of an understanding why such thing happened. I actually admired her and Grant for the restraint they had, the long years they had to endure, and the weight they had to carry before they gave in.



This was such an emotional read for me.

People marry for different reasons. And after reading and finishing Affairytale, the only thing I am actually thankful about is that even though I got stupid, I didn’t marry for the reason CJ had (first marriage) for a relationship I know is doom from the start. It actually inspired me to think about my choices and decisions and my life. And to take a moment, to breathe, to see and enjoy life, and take pleasure in what life has to offer us. Indeed, they had inspired me and I am grateful that I am able to read a beautiful story and experience the great love they had through the pages of a book.

I am, however, saddened for Levi. I’m hoping that Levi too will experience a great joy the couple had. To wish that life would grant him the opportunity to meet the one person who will offer him love and happiness, and most especially, contentment.

“It hurt like seeing a long lost love in a busy crowd, the one you compared all the others too, the one you loved more than you’ll ever love anyone again, the one you lost.”

This is a BR with my Shhlut sisters in honor of the amazing IndieSTAR chat happening now with Leighton, French, James & English!
Join our (F) BR and chat here: https://goo.gl/x9SNPn
99¢ for a limited time! http://goo.gl/aFzIyP

[⚜️Charlotte⚜️ · Rating 4 out of 5]

4 stars!

BR with the Shhluts!

A Beautifully written story! emotional, sensual, heartbreaking at times, including an in depth look inside C.J.'s personal struggle with life, love and a serious medical condition.

Written with such detailed honesty, it
felt like I was reading her diary, I do
wish that the love scenes between Grant & C.J. could have been more descriptive, especially with the detailed attention paid to everything else...it had me feeling a little left out, having said that, its a story worth telling and reading! I truly loved it!

Love Wins! ;)

[Lisa *-* GiViNg It To YoU * LoCk StOcK & TwO SmOkiNg BaRrELs · Rating 4 out of 5]

Enjoyable Read....Review To Come