What do you think?
Rate this book
Monsters in the Midwest #1
Wisconsin Vamp
An alternate cover for this ASIN can be found here.
Some vampires are destined for greatness. He's not one of them.
When truckstop diner cook and mediocre bowler Herb Knudsen becomes a vampire, his once simple life gets a bit more complicated.
Herb’s not even sure how it happened. He wasn’t bitten by a vampire, which means there’s no one around to help him learn the ropes. With no one to guide him, Herb fumbles into his newfound abilities, courting disaster with every step.
Despite learning each new lesson the hard way, being a vampire isn’t all bad. He’s stronger, a little sexier, and a heck of a lot better at bowling. Even Lois, the girl of his dreams, is starting to notice him. But he can’t drink beer, the bodies are piling up, and his best friend Dallas isn’t just getting suspicious – he’s getting jealous.
When Lois is caught in the middle of the two friends' escalating rivalry, keeping his dark secret becomes the least of Herb's concerns.
Booze, bowling, bake sales, bar fights, babes, blood and karaoke... Who would have thought that being undead would make life so exciting?
Some vampires are destined for greatness. He's not one of them.
When truckstop diner cook and mediocre bowler Herb Knudsen becomes a vampire, his once simple life gets a bit more complicated.
Herb’s not even sure how it happened. He wasn’t bitten by a vampire, which means there’s no one around to help him learn the ropes. With no one to guide him, Herb fumbles into his newfound abilities, courting disaster with every step.
Despite learning each new lesson the hard way, being a vampire isn’t all bad. He’s stronger, a little sexier, and a heck of a lot better at bowling. Even Lois, the girl of his dreams, is starting to notice him. But he can’t drink beer, the bodies are piling up, and his best friend Dallas isn’t just getting suspicious – he’s getting jealous.
When Lois is caught in the middle of the two friends' escalating rivalry, keeping his dark secret becomes the least of Herb's concerns.
Booze, bowling, bake sales, bar fights, babes, blood and karaoke... Who would have thought that being undead would make life so exciting?
351 pages, Kindle Edition
First published January 14, 2014
245 people are currently reading
1187 people want to read
About the author
Scott Burtness
20 books209 followersPeople say you should write what you know. That’s damn good advice, so Scott writes about ordinary Midwesterners making an extraordinary mess of things. Hey, if the flannel fits…
Oh- one more thing: According to Scott, ‘ordinary’ totally includes vampires, werewolves, zombies, shapeshifters, aliens, and more. Heck, it is the Midwest, after all.
Oh- one more thing: According to Scott, ‘ordinary’ totally includes vampires, werewolves, zombies, shapeshifters, aliens, and more. Heck, it is the Midwest, after all.
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 96 reviews
February 20, 2022
Story 3/5
Narration 4/5
A sweet vampire story!
Narration 4/5
A sweet vampire story!
November 27, 2022
This is 3.5 stars rounded to 4. It was a fun, sometimes silly, book about a relatively normal guy accidentally becoming a vampire. He isn’t all that good at being a vampire much like he wasn’t very good at living his mortal life. But he did manage to have a brief time of being a small town hero. Overall, the thought of a rather pathetic guy becoming a vampire and gaining popularity in his small town was an entertaining idea.
May 29, 2016
Finally, a book that thrives amongst the mammoth weight of modern vampirical prose, even as it gently pokes fun at it.
But that isn’t what this book is all about. No, “Wisconsin Vamp” is more about the “Wisconsin”; Herb is an amiable loser living in a small town, happy to ride the coat tails of his bigger-fish friend, Dallas. Working at a truck stop and drinking down at the bar is pretty much Herb’s life and he’s pretty much neither happy nor unhappy.
But take away his reflection, create an aversion to garlic and make it impossible for him to go outside during the day and Herb is going to get restless. Especially when he suddenly becomes good at whatever Vampires are good at.
Which is everything.
So Herb’s life is turned around – he becomes unbeatable at pool, and can only bowl perfect scores. He gets laid and makes more friends. He even makes another Vamp. And he kills someone. Oops.
‘Wisconsin Vamp’ was filled with rollicking fun and eccentric characters. By the end of the book I didn’t want to become a Vampire. But I do want to visit Wisconsin. Real soon!
But that isn’t what this book is all about. No, “Wisconsin Vamp” is more about the “Wisconsin”; Herb is an amiable loser living in a small town, happy to ride the coat tails of his bigger-fish friend, Dallas. Working at a truck stop and drinking down at the bar is pretty much Herb’s life and he’s pretty much neither happy nor unhappy.
But take away his reflection, create an aversion to garlic and make it impossible for him to go outside during the day and Herb is going to get restless. Especially when he suddenly becomes good at whatever Vampires are good at.
Which is everything.
So Herb’s life is turned around – he becomes unbeatable at pool, and can only bowl perfect scores. He gets laid and makes more friends. He even makes another Vamp. And he kills someone. Oops.
‘Wisconsin Vamp’ was filled with rollicking fun and eccentric characters. By the end of the book I didn’t want to become a Vampire. But I do want to visit Wisconsin. Real soon!
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
February 3, 2016
I really enjoyed Wisconsin Vamp by Scott Burtness. I'm not usually a horror fan but a horror comedy set in the Midwest? Yes, I can totally get down with that. What really tripped my trigger were the characters and the setting. I grew up with guys like Herb and Dallas; schlubby underachievers who just want to do their own thing and over the top egoists who have to be the center of attention. Looking around my small town in Ohio I can walk a mile to some woods where Herb may live and drive ten minutes to a truckstop where he may work. Looking out the window of my office I can see diesel pickups like Dallas drives. I even bowled last weekend. Burtness' characters are well thought out and you genuinely like them more and more as the story progresses.
The comedy / horror mixture is perfect with the story not relying too heavily on either. It's just a good tale that grabs the reader and holds their attention as it plays out. You'll have a lot of fun reading it. I'm looking forward to book 2 in the Monsters in the Midwest series.
The comedy / horror mixture is perfect with the story not relying too heavily on either. It's just a good tale that grabs the reader and holds their attention as it plays out. You'll have a lot of fun reading it. I'm looking forward to book 2 in the Monsters in the Midwest series.
August 16, 2016
This book bites...but in a good way!
If you like to take a light-hearted approach to your Vampire themed fiction, there can be no better journey than with Herb, Lois and Dallas, Trappersville's very own royalty. Burtness captures the perfect comedic angle on small town life, from Herb's three alarm clock routine, to his cluttered trailer, to his idiosyncratic Pinto. And this is where the book really shines. Everyday routines take on a hilarious identity with the writers eye for the surreal and make small town characters jump off the page. The plot travels along nicely and without wanting to spoil things, Herb undergoes a change. This brings the character in an (almost) perfect arc, as we see how these changes affect Herb and his friends and their relationship with the citizens of Trapperville. The characters that draw you in, will have you crying for more, so be sure to check out the 2nd instalment, Northwoods Wolfman, for more larger-than-life Dallas action. You won't be disappointed!
If you like to take a light-hearted approach to your Vampire themed fiction, there can be no better journey than with Herb, Lois and Dallas, Trappersville's very own royalty. Burtness captures the perfect comedic angle on small town life, from Herb's three alarm clock routine, to his cluttered trailer, to his idiosyncratic Pinto. And this is where the book really shines. Everyday routines take on a hilarious identity with the writers eye for the surreal and make small town characters jump off the page. The plot travels along nicely and without wanting to spoil things, Herb undergoes a change. This brings the character in an (almost) perfect arc, as we see how these changes affect Herb and his friends and their relationship with the citizens of Trapperville. The characters that draw you in, will have you crying for more, so be sure to check out the 2nd instalment, Northwoods Wolfman, for more larger-than-life Dallas action. You won't be disappointed!
September 30, 2019
It would make a humorous movie with the right actors.
March 17, 2018
Scott Burtness gives a refreshing, Midwestern twist on the vampire mythos in his debut novel, Wisconsin Vamp. The protagonist, Herb Knudsen, lives in a small town in rural Wisconsin, drinking beer with his bowling buddies and working as a short-order cook at the local greasy spoon. When Herb is bitten by a vampire-mosquito, Herb doesn't become your average vampire.
Herb doesn't hang out at the local goth club casually drinking blood from a wine glass while listening to Switchblade Symphony. Quite the opposite. Herb wears a flannel shirt, drives a beat up Pinto and hangs out at the bowling alley and the local strip club, Nekked's. Herb's adventures discovering his new powers and weaknesses make for a fun adventure.
The writing is pro, and the pace is snappy. The Midwestern attitude of Jennifer's Body meets The Lost Boys on the bowling lanes of The Big Lebowski in this smartly written horror/comedy. If you enjoy this, then check out the sequels in Scott's 'Monsters in the Midwest' series.
Herb doesn't hang out at the local goth club casually drinking blood from a wine glass while listening to Switchblade Symphony. Quite the opposite. Herb wears a flannel shirt, drives a beat up Pinto and hangs out at the bowling alley and the local strip club, Nekked's. Herb's adventures discovering his new powers and weaknesses make for a fun adventure.
The writing is pro, and the pace is snappy. The Midwestern attitude of Jennifer's Body meets The Lost Boys on the bowling lanes of The Big Lebowski in this smartly written horror/comedy. If you enjoy this, then check out the sequels in Scott's 'Monsters in the Midwest' series.
September 27, 2022
Lot's of fun. Hard to put down
This is the first Scott Burtness book I have read and I found it hard to put down. It is a great mix of horror comedy that feels well written and thought out. The characters have a realistic feel to them like old friends.
The world Scott paints in the book could be any small midwest town in the United States
I highly recommend this book.
This is the first Scott Burtness book I have read and I found it hard to put down. It is a great mix of horror comedy that feels well written and thought out. The characters have a realistic feel to them like old friends.
The world Scott paints in the book could be any small midwest town in the United States
I highly recommend this book.
February 5, 2023
Forget about the vamp. Are you ready for all this Wisconsin? Burtness makes America's dairyland the real star of his novel. He brings a unique regional voice to this tale. You may not have known you needed a beer-drinking, Packer-loving vampire in your life, but you did. Get ready to let Herb into your life!
August 12, 2016
Wisconsin Vamp is a humorous underdog story about what happens when your average Joe - or in this case, Herb - becomes a vampire. While it's mostly lighthearted and tongue-in-cheek, it also has a dash of drama and romance to round it out.
I found a lot to like in this book. The first thing that caught my attention - on the first page, in fact - were some well-turned phrases. Second, although sometimes the characters were the epitome of cliche, by the end I empathized with and even felt I understood, to an extent, Herb, Stanley, Dallas and Lois. They became more 3D than their cliched counterparts. Third, I thought the pacing was excellent, and the twists and turns were unpredictable yet believable.
But the most amazing thing to me was the similarity between what vampirism does for Herb and what it does for my own character, Lilly. No, this is not just a shameless and ill-timed plug of my own book. I'm serious here. One of the points I'm trying to make in the Lilly Frank series is that becoming a vampire frees Lilly from many of the physical and social constraints that keep her numbed to herself and to life. Similarly, when Herb becomes a vampire, he begins, in some ways, to finally, truly live. His senses are heightened. He notices details about people and places more. He begins to gain confidence and be less afraid, and he therefore takes more risks. And it's only after Herb's vampirism is well-established that we begin to get to know Lois more because until that point Herb could barely look at or talk to her. As a human he saw her only as a shiny object to admire but never touch, the angel on the pedestal, but as a vampire, because he has less of his crippling self-doubt to contend with, he begins to relate to her more as a person, to see that in addition to beautiful, usually cheerful and relatively intelligent, she is also fallible (and yet still worthy of his affection).
One aspect of the book that I feel torn about is the ending. While I give it kudos for catching me off-guard - something that doesn't happen to me very often - one of the reasons it caught me off-guard was because it seemed contrary to the metaphor of the book. Or at least what I thought was the metaphor.
**Spoiler alert: skip to next paragraph if you want to avoid spoilers.**
Herb begins to truly live only to die and be damned to hell? He finally stands up to Dallas and is rewarded with a stake through his heart? He finds the beauty in life and continues to try very hard to be a good person - never killing anyone on purpose and in fact saving two lives - only to be sentenced to an eternity of torment? Not fair. Not fair at all. My only consolation is in hoping that the last book in this series involves all the monsters we will come to know and love meeting up in hell and forming some kind of army. Some sort of group retribution for the shitty hand dealt to them. Hmph.
**Spoiler alert over.**
I also thought that some of the flashbacks maybe went on a bit long. For example, the part about last year's bowling tournament and this year's jerseys was probably my least-favorite part of the book, if only because I would've been satisfied with a lot less on that subject. That said, it's a hard thing to successfully walk the thin line between context and TMI, and Burtness does it well for most of the book.
The only last little thing that bugged me was that I was distracted by the copy editing errors. I'm so sorry to keep bringing this up in reviews, but it's one of the things I notice. I'm just made that way. **PSA: Dear indie authors, please have someone who is really good at it copy edit your book. It doesn't have to be a professional editor. It doesn't have to cost you money. Friends, family members, and teachers are all resources. There is just no reason on earth why you can't take that little step that will mean so much to so many of us. Thank you.**
In summary, this was a book I enjoyed and recommend for lovers of comedy as well as those who want a fresh take on the vampire genre. I eagerly await the next Monsters in the Midwest book.
I found a lot to like in this book. The first thing that caught my attention - on the first page, in fact - were some well-turned phrases. Second, although sometimes the characters were the epitome of cliche, by the end I empathized with and even felt I understood, to an extent, Herb, Stanley, Dallas and Lois. They became more 3D than their cliched counterparts. Third, I thought the pacing was excellent, and the twists and turns were unpredictable yet believable.
But the most amazing thing to me was the similarity between what vampirism does for Herb and what it does for my own character, Lilly. No, this is not just a shameless and ill-timed plug of my own book. I'm serious here. One of the points I'm trying to make in the Lilly Frank series is that becoming a vampire frees Lilly from many of the physical and social constraints that keep her numbed to herself and to life. Similarly, when Herb becomes a vampire, he begins, in some ways, to finally, truly live. His senses are heightened. He notices details about people and places more. He begins to gain confidence and be less afraid, and he therefore takes more risks. And it's only after Herb's vampirism is well-established that we begin to get to know Lois more because until that point Herb could barely look at or talk to her. As a human he saw her only as a shiny object to admire but never touch, the angel on the pedestal, but as a vampire, because he has less of his crippling self-doubt to contend with, he begins to relate to her more as a person, to see that in addition to beautiful, usually cheerful and relatively intelligent, she is also fallible (and yet still worthy of his affection).
One aspect of the book that I feel torn about is the ending. While I give it kudos for catching me off-guard - something that doesn't happen to me very often - one of the reasons it caught me off-guard was because it seemed contrary to the metaphor of the book. Or at least what I thought was the metaphor.
**Spoiler alert: skip to next paragraph if you want to avoid spoilers.**
Herb begins to truly live only to die and be damned to hell? He finally stands up to Dallas and is rewarded with a stake through his heart? He finds the beauty in life and continues to try very hard to be a good person - never killing anyone on purpose and in fact saving two lives - only to be sentenced to an eternity of torment? Not fair. Not fair at all. My only consolation is in hoping that the last book in this series involves all the monsters we will come to know and love meeting up in hell and forming some kind of army. Some sort of group retribution for the shitty hand dealt to them. Hmph.
**Spoiler alert over.**
I also thought that some of the flashbacks maybe went on a bit long. For example, the part about last year's bowling tournament and this year's jerseys was probably my least-favorite part of the book, if only because I would've been satisfied with a lot less on that subject. That said, it's a hard thing to successfully walk the thin line between context and TMI, and Burtness does it well for most of the book.
The only last little thing that bugged me was that I was distracted by the copy editing errors. I'm so sorry to keep bringing this up in reviews, but it's one of the things I notice. I'm just made that way. **PSA: Dear indie authors, please have someone who is really good at it copy edit your book. It doesn't have to be a professional editor. It doesn't have to cost you money. Friends, family members, and teachers are all resources. There is just no reason on earth why you can't take that little step that will mean so much to so many of us. Thank you.**
In summary, this was a book I enjoyed and recommend for lovers of comedy as well as those who want a fresh take on the vampire genre. I eagerly await the next Monsters in the Midwest book.
July 20, 2017
4.5 Stars.
The Book
Or as I found myself thinking about it "So, you're a Vampire. Now what?" Herb isn't anyone special, used to living in the shadow of his best friend Dallas he is the lesser known of the close knit three-man friendship circle. Dallas is the typical stud of the town, swinging between Herbs bully and saviour. Even Stanley, a stuttering ball of useless advise, is better known than him, and that's only because of one random event that to this day no one truly understands but that everyone speculated about. And then he gets bitten by a skeeter (mosquito) who'd gate crashed on a vampires feeding frenzy. Suddenly he's stronger, faster, even better looking.
The story follows Herb as he learns to live as an entirely new, improved version of his former self. Soon however it becomes evident that while it's probably the coolest thing ever, there are certain challenges he may never fully over come.
What I liked
1. Herb's internal dialogue. While reading I imagined that his thoughts would be the exact kind I'd have if I were ever to be bitten by a vampiric skeeter.
2. The realism of life as a vampire. I love that Herb didn't just glide into his new life, Burtness did an incredible job at creating a realistic character with a near constant stream of flaws which he works desperately to fix. This is not a glamorous vampire tale.
3. The End...? Firstly because I hope this means another book will be gracing my Kindle screen soon. Secondly because the actual ending of the story was so far from what I'd expected, it felt as though it took on an entirely different, darker, tone.
What I didn't like
1. Not so much a dislike, but more of a wish for more of the Master. My interest was piqued with him, I would have loved a bit more of his dry disdain for Herb being present in the book - BUT for the little time he's there, I loved it.
2. I stayed up all night reading it. So now I'm tired. I don't like that I didn't get much sleep.
Final thoughts
I love a book that I cannot put down. Or lock the screen on and forget about. To the best of my recollection I've never read a book of this kind, where a usually dark subject such as vampirism suddenly becomes something worth of a movie along the lines of Shaun of the Dead. It's a welcome genre shift in a market that I feel has gotten just a little saturated with seriousness and glitter.
This is a horromedy (horror/comedy). Burtness did a superb job in bringing the stereotypical horror genre characters forward while still keeping their personalities at a relatable level. Herb is the victim, the hero, the comedian, the a**hole. I feel bad for him. A destiny he had no part in choosing, a life he never anticipated living, and an ending I'm not soon going to forget.
The Book
Or as I found myself thinking about it "So, you're a Vampire. Now what?" Herb isn't anyone special, used to living in the shadow of his best friend Dallas he is the lesser known of the close knit three-man friendship circle. Dallas is the typical stud of the town, swinging between Herbs bully and saviour. Even Stanley, a stuttering ball of useless advise, is better known than him, and that's only because of one random event that to this day no one truly understands but that everyone speculated about. And then he gets bitten by a skeeter (mosquito) who'd gate crashed on a vampires feeding frenzy. Suddenly he's stronger, faster, even better looking.
The story follows Herb as he learns to live as an entirely new, improved version of his former self. Soon however it becomes evident that while it's probably the coolest thing ever, there are certain challenges he may never fully over come.
What I liked
1. Herb's internal dialogue. While reading I imagined that his thoughts would be the exact kind I'd have if I were ever to be bitten by a vampiric skeeter.
2. The realism of life as a vampire. I love that Herb didn't just glide into his new life, Burtness did an incredible job at creating a realistic character with a near constant stream of flaws which he works desperately to fix. This is not a glamorous vampire tale.
3. The End...? Firstly because I hope this means another book will be gracing my Kindle screen soon. Secondly because the actual ending of the story was so far from what I'd expected, it felt as though it took on an entirely different, darker, tone.
What I didn't like
1. Not so much a dislike, but more of a wish for more of the Master. My interest was piqued with him, I would have loved a bit more of his dry disdain for Herb being present in the book - BUT for the little time he's there, I loved it.
2. I stayed up all night reading it. So now I'm tired. I don't like that I didn't get much sleep.
Final thoughts
I love a book that I cannot put down. Or lock the screen on and forget about. To the best of my recollection I've never read a book of this kind, where a usually dark subject such as vampirism suddenly becomes something worth of a movie along the lines of Shaun of the Dead. It's a welcome genre shift in a market that I feel has gotten just a little saturated with seriousness and glitter.
This is a horromedy (horror/comedy). Burtness did a superb job in bringing the stereotypical horror genre characters forward while still keeping their personalities at a relatable level. Herb is the victim, the hero, the comedian, the a**hole. I feel bad for him. A destiny he had no part in choosing, a life he never anticipated living, and an ending I'm not soon going to forget.
December 10, 2014
A First Reads win. While the style of this book, kind of silly humor, isn't generally my cup of tea, Scott Burtness pulled it off quite well and kept my attention. For a self-published book, there were fewer errors than in many others, but a few still stood out like, well, like a vampire in the Wisconsin northwoods. At one point the author mixes up "who's" and "whose" and at two points, he uses "sequence" instead of "sequins." He also uses "wallah" when he should have written "viola." (Perhaps this last one is intentional, but since the book isn't written in first person, it's just wrong.) There is a kind of folksy style to the writing, which is fine; I had to chuckle when he used the phrase "ass over teakettle" -- the first time. By the third time I read it, I groaned. One of the worst offenses is that there's a line of blank space separating every single paragraph throughout the book. This looks incredibly unprofessional, like a middle school term paper.
That aside, however, how about the content? Like I said, Burtness kept my interest, and the folksy, funny style mixes well with the horror story setting. I wanted to find out what happened, even though none of the characters are endearing or very deep. Although this book is mostly funny and seems aimed at a particular audience, one scene involves some pretty steamy sex that felt out of place. And a few times the horror overtakes the humor in an unpleasant way.
Overall, this was a fun read with a few too many errors that would have been fixed by an editor/proofreader. The cover also advertises it as "Monsters in the Midwest Book One." Unfortunately, I feel a series would take away from the uniqueness and fun qualities of this book.
That aside, however, how about the content? Like I said, Burtness kept my interest, and the folksy, funny style mixes well with the horror story setting. I wanted to find out what happened, even though none of the characters are endearing or very deep. Although this book is mostly funny and seems aimed at a particular audience, one scene involves some pretty steamy sex that felt out of place. And a few times the horror overtakes the humor in an unpleasant way.
Overall, this was a fun read with a few too many errors that would have been fixed by an editor/proofreader. The cover also advertises it as "Monsters in the Midwest Book One." Unfortunately, I feel a series would take away from the uniqueness and fun qualities of this book.
August 21, 2016
Wisconsin Vamp
When the least likely person in the world becomes a vampire - Life in Trappersville is about to change forever. With new skills; new powers and a new thirst Herb - who makes really good french toast - is about to find out what it's like to go from no-one to someone in a short span of time. With no instructions; no mentor and no clue in general - Herb is about to go on one wild ride but will his attention hogging buddy enjoy being out of the spotlight? You'll have to read it and see.
I can't remember the last time I read such an honest funny story. I generally so fantasy but mines generally not comedy. As a vampire story lover I was skeptical when I opened this book. Comedy and vampires? How was this going to work? But dammit this story was amazing!!!
I can't remember the last time I read a vampire book that had me saying "that is exactly what I would do" on almost every page. It's brilliant how Scott has taken something drenched traditional expectation and revived it in a realistic modern and hilarious way. Between bowling and tanning beds; vampire movies and Pinto's that make weird sounds when they turn - this book awakened something in me I thought long dead: excitement!!!!!
I enjoy reading, no, I love reading. I can read anything and everything with an open mind. But it takes an exceptional writer to absorb me into their story and make me taste the blood, hear the heartbeats and truly dread the discovery.
If you are looking for a story that can claim your attention, make you laugh while you chew your lip in anticipation and put an absolute 'whammy' on you as you get lost in the woods of Wisconsin then look no further. This is the book for you!
When the least likely person in the world becomes a vampire - Life in Trappersville is about to change forever. With new skills; new powers and a new thirst Herb - who makes really good french toast - is about to find out what it's like to go from no-one to someone in a short span of time. With no instructions; no mentor and no clue in general - Herb is about to go on one wild ride but will his attention hogging buddy enjoy being out of the spotlight? You'll have to read it and see.
I can't remember the last time I read such an honest funny story. I generally so fantasy but mines generally not comedy. As a vampire story lover I was skeptical when I opened this book. Comedy and vampires? How was this going to work? But dammit this story was amazing!!!
I can't remember the last time I read a vampire book that had me saying "that is exactly what I would do" on almost every page. It's brilliant how Scott has taken something drenched traditional expectation and revived it in a realistic modern and hilarious way. Between bowling and tanning beds; vampire movies and Pinto's that make weird sounds when they turn - this book awakened something in me I thought long dead: excitement!!!!!
I enjoy reading, no, I love reading. I can read anything and everything with an open mind. But it takes an exceptional writer to absorb me into their story and make me taste the blood, hear the heartbeats and truly dread the discovery.
If you are looking for a story that can claim your attention, make you laugh while you chew your lip in anticipation and put an absolute 'whammy' on you as you get lost in the woods of Wisconsin then look no further. This is the book for you!
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
August 14, 2014
Sookie Stackhouse look out - Herb Knudsen's in town!
Wisconsin Vamp was a great, funny read that had me hooked from the opening mosquito bite! Mr. Burtness has characters that are cheesy and stereotypical, but so lovable because the reader recognizes them in their circle of friends immediately.
Right off the bat (no pun intended), we meet Herb, a grill cook who would trip over a banana peel twice if it were possible. In small town Trappersville, Herb's heart is set on Lois - the girl next door - attractive and seemingly unattainable. But Lois has her eye on ladies man - and former jock - Dallas.
As Herb begins to change, he begins to notice crazy quirks, and it was a very fun read putting myself into Herb's shoes. A well written tale that is both faithful to the genre and tongue in cheek, Wisconsin Vamp will satisfy readers, and is right up there with Sookie Stackhouse on my list of enjoyable vampire reads. Well done, sir!
I would recommend this book to all ages. While there is some slightly adult language, including one F-bomb (much to the chagrin of the Trappersville folk - you just don't drop an F-bomb without warning), I was whammy'd enough by this tale to recommend it to my (almost) teen son. My only critique is one that I suffered when releasing my own novel - There are a couple of copyedit errors that threw me and jarred me out of an otherwise smooth story. With those fixed, this would have been a 5-Star read easily.
Wisconsin Vamp was a great, funny read that had me hooked from the opening mosquito bite! Mr. Burtness has characters that are cheesy and stereotypical, but so lovable because the reader recognizes them in their circle of friends immediately.
Right off the bat (no pun intended), we meet Herb, a grill cook who would trip over a banana peel twice if it were possible. In small town Trappersville, Herb's heart is set on Lois - the girl next door - attractive and seemingly unattainable. But Lois has her eye on ladies man - and former jock - Dallas.
As Herb begins to change, he begins to notice crazy quirks, and it was a very fun read putting myself into Herb's shoes. A well written tale that is both faithful to the genre and tongue in cheek, Wisconsin Vamp will satisfy readers, and is right up there with Sookie Stackhouse on my list of enjoyable vampire reads. Well done, sir!
I would recommend this book to all ages. While there is some slightly adult language, including one F-bomb (much to the chagrin of the Trappersville folk - you just don't drop an F-bomb without warning), I was whammy'd enough by this tale to recommend it to my (almost) teen son. My only critique is one that I suffered when releasing my own novel - There are a couple of copyedit errors that threw me and jarred me out of an otherwise smooth story. With those fixed, this would have been a 5-Star read easily.
July 16, 2014
4.5 stars!!!
Full review up My Book Filled Life
Let me introduce you to Herb, a somewhat less-than-average cook at “Ronnie’s Famous Truck-stop, Grill, Bait Shop and Gift Emporium” located in some small town in Wisconsin. Herb doesn’t have it going on. At. All. He drives a Pinto and needs three different alarm clocks just to help him get up in the mornings. Through a weird twist of fate (and I mean weird), Herb becomes the newest citizen of the undead society. And oh what a journey it is! True to form, Herb doesn’t experience the transformation of waking up 3 days later looking like a Calvin Klein underwear model. No, his transformation is more Tales from the Crypt than America’s Next Top Model.
The ending comes as somewhat of a shock, but given the overall unique quality of this story, it does seem to follow the unconventional route of endings. I can’t wait to read the next book in the series and recommend this book to anyone who is looking for a decidedly one-of-a-kind vampire hero.
Full review up My Book Filled Life
Let me introduce you to Herb, a somewhat less-than-average cook at “Ronnie’s Famous Truck-stop, Grill, Bait Shop and Gift Emporium” located in some small town in Wisconsin. Herb doesn’t have it going on. At. All. He drives a Pinto and needs three different alarm clocks just to help him get up in the mornings. Through a weird twist of fate (and I mean weird), Herb becomes the newest citizen of the undead society. And oh what a journey it is! True to form, Herb doesn’t experience the transformation of waking up 3 days later looking like a Calvin Klein underwear model. No, his transformation is more Tales from the Crypt than America’s Next Top Model.
The ending comes as somewhat of a shock, but given the overall unique quality of this story, it does seem to follow the unconventional route of endings. I can’t wait to read the next book in the series and recommend this book to anyone who is looking for a decidedly one-of-a-kind vampire hero.
May 14, 2015
Funny and thoughtful
This quirky book brings to mind many a night (and many a character) from the tiny town in which I went to college. The hero is a generally charming, thoughtful Everyman whose story has more depth than one might expect. A quick, enjoyable read.
This quirky book brings to mind many a night (and many a character) from the tiny town in which I went to college. The hero is a generally charming, thoughtful Everyman whose story has more depth than one might expect. A quick, enjoyable read.
March 25, 2015
Really good
I really enjoyed this book. I like that it had some comedy too. I wouldn't recommend that you read it.
I really enjoyed this book. I like that it had some comedy too. I wouldn't recommend that you read it.
September 15, 2016
I believe that this is the first vampire story where the cause is a mosquito bite.
Thanks again to Goodreads giveaways for my signed copy!
Thanks again to Goodreads giveaways for my signed copy!
June 11, 2019
WISCONSIN VAMP is my first read from Scott Burtness. And to be honest, I was very impressed. I’m never sure what I’m going to get with horror comedy. While I do enjoy it, it’s never my first preference for genre. I often feel the formula isn’t quite right. Too much silliness, too little tomfoolery, not enough blood, you get the idea. But, I am very happy to say that I enjoyed this book a great deal. The formula was perfect. Let me explain.
Herb is a very lovable loser, and if you’re into any frat comedy at all, you’ll love Dallas’ arrogant idiot charm. This is usually where horror comedy will lose me because the characters will be so over the top in their stupidity or their jokery that slapstick will be beaten to death. When we go so far down the road of silliness, I can no longer take anything seriously. And at that point, it’s no longer ‘horror comedy,’ and it’s simply just ‘comedy.’ Now, if that’s what you like, that’s great. But, I’ve had the chance to meet Mr. Burtness in person. Not only is he exceptionally well spoken and wonderfully mannered, but he fully embraces both terms within his genre. The horror is just as important as his comedy. The comedy itself is less silly, less slapstick and stupendous jokesmanship, and more quick wit and delightful word play within the prose itself.
And that prose is really where Mr. Burtness earns this book. Most of the time, he writes in a comfortable place that takes itself just serious enough, but never *too* serious. Cheeky, wry, fun. Comical, but still serious enough to have some sense of real danger. Some reminder of the *other* word. That one. Horror. Burtness usually sits in a comfortable place, but there are sections throughout where the author showcases his incredible raw talent for writing. To the point of nearly poetry at times. And, for me, those were the greatest treats throughout. A specific scene involving Herb feeding within a freezer is very valid proof. Burtness’ descriptions of not only Herb’s tenderness in feeding, but also his victim, how nearly sensual it becomes. Not lustful or filthy, but sensual, and . . . dare I say . . . poetic. Explaining the feeding of a vampire like the turning and winding of cosmic purpose, and the changing and evolving of flesh within such a disease. Yes. It does get that deep, even if only for a few moments. But it does go to those places. And at those times, it is completely a *horror* book.
This is great stuff. Really reminds me of how SHAWN OF THE DEAD got it right. Just enough serious, just enough funny, all badass. If you want horror comedy that’s a perfect medium-bodied brew that aims to please everyone, this is it. And that’s a daunting task. Most would say it’s impossible to please everyone. But, with the book I read, I feel like Burtness managed to do just that.
Incredible stuff. 5/5 skulls. I can’t wait to devour the rest of the MONSTERS IN THE MIDWEST series.
Herb is a very lovable loser, and if you’re into any frat comedy at all, you’ll love Dallas’ arrogant idiot charm. This is usually where horror comedy will lose me because the characters will be so over the top in their stupidity or their jokery that slapstick will be beaten to death. When we go so far down the road of silliness, I can no longer take anything seriously. And at that point, it’s no longer ‘horror comedy,’ and it’s simply just ‘comedy.’ Now, if that’s what you like, that’s great. But, I’ve had the chance to meet Mr. Burtness in person. Not only is he exceptionally well spoken and wonderfully mannered, but he fully embraces both terms within his genre. The horror is just as important as his comedy. The comedy itself is less silly, less slapstick and stupendous jokesmanship, and more quick wit and delightful word play within the prose itself.
And that prose is really where Mr. Burtness earns this book. Most of the time, he writes in a comfortable place that takes itself just serious enough, but never *too* serious. Cheeky, wry, fun. Comical, but still serious enough to have some sense of real danger. Some reminder of the *other* word. That one. Horror. Burtness usually sits in a comfortable place, but there are sections throughout where the author showcases his incredible raw talent for writing. To the point of nearly poetry at times. And, for me, those were the greatest treats throughout. A specific scene involving Herb feeding within a freezer is very valid proof. Burtness’ descriptions of not only Herb’s tenderness in feeding, but also his victim, how nearly sensual it becomes. Not lustful or filthy, but sensual, and . . . dare I say . . . poetic. Explaining the feeding of a vampire like the turning and winding of cosmic purpose, and the changing and evolving of flesh within such a disease. Yes. It does get that deep, even if only for a few moments. But it does go to those places. And at those times, it is completely a *horror* book.
This is great stuff. Really reminds me of how SHAWN OF THE DEAD got it right. Just enough serious, just enough funny, all badass. If you want horror comedy that’s a perfect medium-bodied brew that aims to please everyone, this is it. And that’s a daunting task. Most would say it’s impossible to please everyone. But, with the book I read, I feel like Burtness managed to do just that.
Incredible stuff. 5/5 skulls. I can’t wait to devour the rest of the MONSTERS IN THE MIDWEST series.
March 30, 2020
This book completely took me by surprise. I started out speed reading the first half of the book thinking it was just a bit of fluff and fun to entertain me during these crazy Covid times. Needless to say my reading slowed down the more I read and as I fell in love with Herb, Stanley and Lois (Dallas not so much). The ending was a complete shocker and I was a little disappointed until I read the teaser for the next book. Now I’m really excited to find out where the story will take me. I will definitely be recommending this to my reader friends.
August 1, 2020
Fun read
I really enjoyed this book, it was a really fun read. The premise was good, and picking a hero like Herb was great. The characters were pretty well developed but I would have liked to get know Stanley better. Maybe he will get his own book? Fast paced with lots of action and just a pinch of romance, it was just a really fun time.
I really enjoyed this book, it was a really fun read. The premise was good, and picking a hero like Herb was great. The characters were pretty well developed but I would have liked to get know Stanley better. Maybe he will get his own book? Fast paced with lots of action and just a pinch of romance, it was just a really fun time.
March 4, 2017
Entertaining Short Read
The short story is a glimpse into the lives and characters of a little town in Wisconsin. Characters are well described. Enjoyable read.
The short story is a glimpse into the lives and characters of a little town in Wisconsin. Characters are well described. Enjoyable read.
June 18, 2018
Fun and campy read. Truly a rural Wisconsin slice of life--or unlife.
August 2, 2014
My rating: 4 stars
Wisconsin Vamp is a humorous underdog story about what happens when your average Joe - or in this case, Herb - becomes a vampire. While it's mostly lighthearted and tongue-in-cheek, it also has a dash of drama and romance to round it out.
I found a lot to like in this book. The first thing that caught my attention - on the first page, in fact - were some well-turned phrases. Second, although sometimes the characters were the epitome of cliche, by the end I empathized with and even felt I understood, to an extent, Herb, Stanley, Dallas and Lois. They became more 3D than their cliched counterparts. Third, I thought the pacing was excellent, and the twists and turns were unpredictable yet believable.
But the most amazing thing to me was the similarity between what vampirism does for Herb and what it does for my own character, Lilly. No, this is not just a shameless and ill-timed plug of my own book. I'm serious here. One of the points I'm trying to make in the Lilly Frank series is that becoming a vampire frees Lilly from many of the physical and social constraints that keep her numbed to herself and to life. Similarly, when Herb becomes a vampire, he begins, in some ways, to finally, truly live. His senses are heightened. He notices details about people and places more. He begins to gain confidence and be less afraid, and he therefore takes more risks. And it's only after Herb's vampirism is well-established that we begin to get to know Lois more because until that point Herb could barely look at or talk to her. As a human he saw her only as a shiny object to admire but never touch, the angel on the pedestal, but as a vampire, because he has less of his crippling self-doubt to contend with, he begins to relate to her more as a person, to see that in addition to beautiful, usually cheerful and relatively intelligent, she is also fallible (and yet still worthy of his affection).
One aspect of the book that I feel torn about is the ending. While I give it kudos for catching me off-guard - something that doesn't happen to me very often - one of the reasons it caught me off-guard was because it seemed contrary to the metaphor of the book. Or at least what I thought was the metaphor.
**Spoiler alert: skip to next paragraph if you want to avoid spoilers.**
Herb begins to truly live only to die and be damned to hell? He finally stands up to Dallas and is rewarded with a stake through his heart? He finds the beauty in life and continues to try very hard to be a good person - never killing anyone on purpose and in fact saving two lives - only to be sentenced to an eternity of torment? Not fair. Not fair at all. My only consolation is in hoping that the last book in this series involves all the monsters we will come to know and love meeting up in hell and forming some kind of army. Some sort of group retribution for the sh*tty hand dealt to them. Hmph.
**Spoiler alert over.**
I also thought that some of the flashbacks maybe went on a bit long. For example, the part about last year's bowling tournament and this year's jerseys was probably my least-favorite part of the book, if only because I would've been satisfied with a lot less on that subject. That said, it's a hard thing to successfully walk the thin line between context and TMI, and Burtness does it well for most of the book.
The only last little thing that bugged me was that I was distracted by the copy editing errors. I'm so sorry to keep bringing this up in reviews, but it's one of the things I notice. I'm just made that way. **PSA: Dear indie authors, please have someone who is really good at it copy edit your book. It doesn't have to be a professional editor. It doesn't have to cost you money. Friends, family members, and teachers are all resources. There is just no reason on earth why you can't take that little step that will mean so much to so many of us. Thank you.**
In summary, this was a book I enjoyed and recommend for lovers of comedy as well as those who want a fresh take on the vampire genre. I eagerly await the next Monsters in the Midwest book.
Wisconsin Vamp is a humorous underdog story about what happens when your average Joe - or in this case, Herb - becomes a vampire. While it's mostly lighthearted and tongue-in-cheek, it also has a dash of drama and romance to round it out.
I found a lot to like in this book. The first thing that caught my attention - on the first page, in fact - were some well-turned phrases. Second, although sometimes the characters were the epitome of cliche, by the end I empathized with and even felt I understood, to an extent, Herb, Stanley, Dallas and Lois. They became more 3D than their cliched counterparts. Third, I thought the pacing was excellent, and the twists and turns were unpredictable yet believable.
But the most amazing thing to me was the similarity between what vampirism does for Herb and what it does for my own character, Lilly. No, this is not just a shameless and ill-timed plug of my own book. I'm serious here. One of the points I'm trying to make in the Lilly Frank series is that becoming a vampire frees Lilly from many of the physical and social constraints that keep her numbed to herself and to life. Similarly, when Herb becomes a vampire, he begins, in some ways, to finally, truly live. His senses are heightened. He notices details about people and places more. He begins to gain confidence and be less afraid, and he therefore takes more risks. And it's only after Herb's vampirism is well-established that we begin to get to know Lois more because until that point Herb could barely look at or talk to her. As a human he saw her only as a shiny object to admire but never touch, the angel on the pedestal, but as a vampire, because he has less of his crippling self-doubt to contend with, he begins to relate to her more as a person, to see that in addition to beautiful, usually cheerful and relatively intelligent, she is also fallible (and yet still worthy of his affection).
One aspect of the book that I feel torn about is the ending. While I give it kudos for catching me off-guard - something that doesn't happen to me very often - one of the reasons it caught me off-guard was because it seemed contrary to the metaphor of the book. Or at least what I thought was the metaphor.
**Spoiler alert: skip to next paragraph if you want to avoid spoilers.**
Herb begins to truly live only to die and be damned to hell? He finally stands up to Dallas and is rewarded with a stake through his heart? He finds the beauty in life and continues to try very hard to be a good person - never killing anyone on purpose and in fact saving two lives - only to be sentenced to an eternity of torment? Not fair. Not fair at all. My only consolation is in hoping that the last book in this series involves all the monsters we will come to know and love meeting up in hell and forming some kind of army. Some sort of group retribution for the sh*tty hand dealt to them. Hmph.
**Spoiler alert over.**
I also thought that some of the flashbacks maybe went on a bit long. For example, the part about last year's bowling tournament and this year's jerseys was probably my least-favorite part of the book, if only because I would've been satisfied with a lot less on that subject. That said, it's a hard thing to successfully walk the thin line between context and TMI, and Burtness does it well for most of the book.
The only last little thing that bugged me was that I was distracted by the copy editing errors. I'm so sorry to keep bringing this up in reviews, but it's one of the things I notice. I'm just made that way. **PSA: Dear indie authors, please have someone who is really good at it copy edit your book. It doesn't have to be a professional editor. It doesn't have to cost you money. Friends, family members, and teachers are all resources. There is just no reason on earth why you can't take that little step that will mean so much to so many of us. Thank you.**
In summary, this was a book I enjoyed and recommend for lovers of comedy as well as those who want a fresh take on the vampire genre. I eagerly await the next Monsters in the Midwest book.
June 27, 2014
I found myself totally engrossed in this book about a small-town restaurant cook turned vampire by the end of the first chapter. I read the entire book within two days because I had to find out what was going to happen to Wisconsin Vamp Herb, a.k.a. Herby to his friends. The author has a talent for creating descriptive phrases. Two of my favorite lines from the book include a description of Herb after he begins his transformation: "his lips pulled back like two dehydrated worms left on the sidewalk in the sun", and "[Herb] was involved in a complicated game of stalk, suck and whammy, his new favorite pastime."
Herb is a very likable character, as are his buddies Dallas and Stanley. Dallas is the over-the-top obnoxious friend who everyone in town seems to like, but not entirely trust because of his drinking and womanizing. Stanley is the off-beat individual who was struck by lightning in high school and was never quite the same afterward. Add a slew of secondary barfly/drunk bowlers and brawlers and the ground is laid for this vamp tale.
Poor Herb finds himself turned into a vampire due to an unexpected, but totally believable, incident in New Orleans. Once back home in Wisconsin, he is left to figure out how to be a vampire on his own. While the story was a little gory in the beginning, I found myself rooting for this underdog vampire as he makes tries to make his way in 'life' with fangs and a dirt bed.
While Herb's body changes and he fights a growing desire to eat everyone in town, a little bit of good still remains. He falls in love with a waitress, but his buddy Dallas is also in love with her.
Things eventually get ugly between Dallas and Herb because of the love triangle and the reader won't know for sure who will come out of their final, epic bar fight alive. I'm not going to tell you because that would spoil the fun!
I recommend this book to anyone who loves quirky, humorous books with a paranormal slant. If you enjoy the Sookie Stackhouse novels by Charlaine Harris, you'll probably enjoy this book as well.
Kudos Scott - I can't wait to read your next installment in this series!
Herb is a very likable character, as are his buddies Dallas and Stanley. Dallas is the over-the-top obnoxious friend who everyone in town seems to like, but not entirely trust because of his drinking and womanizing. Stanley is the off-beat individual who was struck by lightning in high school and was never quite the same afterward. Add a slew of secondary barfly/drunk bowlers and brawlers and the ground is laid for this vamp tale.
Poor Herb finds himself turned into a vampire due to an unexpected, but totally believable, incident in New Orleans. Once back home in Wisconsin, he is left to figure out how to be a vampire on his own. While the story was a little gory in the beginning, I found myself rooting for this underdog vampire as he makes tries to make his way in 'life' with fangs and a dirt bed.
While Herb's body changes and he fights a growing desire to eat everyone in town, a little bit of good still remains. He falls in love with a waitress, but his buddy Dallas is also in love with her.
Things eventually get ugly between Dallas and Herb because of the love triangle and the reader won't know for sure who will come out of their final, epic bar fight alive. I'm not going to tell you because that would spoil the fun!
I recommend this book to anyone who loves quirky, humorous books with a paranormal slant. If you enjoy the Sookie Stackhouse novels by Charlaine Harris, you'll probably enjoy this book as well.
Kudos Scott - I can't wait to read your next installment in this series!
October 27, 2014
Wisconsin Vamp is the first book in Author Scott Burtness's Monsters in The Midwest series, detailing the unfortunate vampication of Herb Knudson who makes pretty good French toast.
Herb has spent his whole life as the victim. Bullies tormented him throughout his school years, one of them his best friend Dallas, and now as an adult he's plagued by crippling shyness around the girl of his dreams - who happens to be the waitress at the diner where he works as a cook. After being bitten by a strange mosquito, Herb finds himself as one of the undead... as in, he's become a vampire. He doesn't understand why, or what he's supposed to do, but he figures he'll just go with the flow. When bodies start to pile up, and his blood lust starts to control his life (as does his desire to get the girl before his friend does) Herb finds himself going down a dark path... and part of him likes it.
I really enjoyed this book. My biggest point to make for it is that the author is a terrific writer. The narrative of this story was very well done, almost poetic in a down-to-earth sort of way. It didn't just state facts like some books do, it actually gave great insight to the moment with a slightly detached voice outside of Herb. I found that very interesting, though sometimes it derailed the story a bit.
I give this book four stars, not because of editing or bad story telling. The editing was pretty good, and the story itself was fantastic. What makes me drop a star is the character Herb himself. I was kind of annoyed by his near speech impediment. The constant "Oh, um. Yeah. Right. Uh" stuff. It at times irked me a lot, and in other spots it kind of fit, especially at the very beginning. But it kept going, and I felt like that should have been tossed out as soon as he became a vampire.
Overall though, this was an awesome book. I greatly recommend it to those who are looking for a new take on the vampire story concept!
Herb has spent his whole life as the victim. Bullies tormented him throughout his school years, one of them his best friend Dallas, and now as an adult he's plagued by crippling shyness around the girl of his dreams - who happens to be the waitress at the diner where he works as a cook. After being bitten by a strange mosquito, Herb finds himself as one of the undead... as in, he's become a vampire. He doesn't understand why, or what he's supposed to do, but he figures he'll just go with the flow. When bodies start to pile up, and his blood lust starts to control his life (as does his desire to get the girl before his friend does) Herb finds himself going down a dark path... and part of him likes it.
I really enjoyed this book. My biggest point to make for it is that the author is a terrific writer. The narrative of this story was very well done, almost poetic in a down-to-earth sort of way. It didn't just state facts like some books do, it actually gave great insight to the moment with a slightly detached voice outside of Herb. I found that very interesting, though sometimes it derailed the story a bit.
I give this book four stars, not because of editing or bad story telling. The editing was pretty good, and the story itself was fantastic. What makes me drop a star is the character Herb himself. I was kind of annoyed by his near speech impediment. The constant "Oh, um. Yeah. Right. Uh" stuff. It at times irked me a lot, and in other spots it kind of fit, especially at the very beginning. But it kept going, and I felt like that should have been tossed out as soon as he became a vampire.
Overall though, this was an awesome book. I greatly recommend it to those who are looking for a new take on the vampire story concept!
July 11, 2014
Herb is your average guy. He enjoys meeting up with his mates for beer and bowling. He's not the most handsome of guys and he lacks confidence when it comes to the object of his affections, Lois. Unfortunately for Herb, his far more confident friend, Dallas, also has a thing for Lois. Herb is the underdog that you will end up rooting for.
Herb lives out in the sticks and is usually resistant to bugs, until he's bitten by a super bug that turns him into a vampire. His transformation is not the stuff of romance novels, it isn't pretty for poor Herb! His skin blisters and burns, he's violently ill, and develops a taste for raw meat. It's not all bad though. His senses are heightened, everything becomes more colourful and beautiful. As his confidence grows he's able to get to know Lois.
Things eventually get ugly between Herb and Dallas, and that's all I'm going to say because I don't want to spoil the ending.
It's well-written. The descriptions are great, I felt like I was there seeing it all through Herb's eyes. I'd describe it as a comedic romance/horror. It was a lot of fun to read but you will feel for poor Herb! I will be reading more from this author.
Herb lives out in the sticks and is usually resistant to bugs, until he's bitten by a super bug that turns him into a vampire. His transformation is not the stuff of romance novels, it isn't pretty for poor Herb! His skin blisters and burns, he's violently ill, and develops a taste for raw meat. It's not all bad though. His senses are heightened, everything becomes more colourful and beautiful. As his confidence grows he's able to get to know Lois.
Things eventually get ugly between Herb and Dallas, and that's all I'm going to say because I don't want to spoil the ending.
It's well-written. The descriptions are great, I felt like I was there seeing it all through Herb's eyes. I'd describe it as a comedic romance/horror. It was a lot of fun to read but you will feel for poor Herb! I will be reading more from this author.
August 18, 2015
This book sees a very regular guy, Herb, get accidentally turned into a vampire by a passing mosquito. Herb is very much the guy next door; you can identify with him, like him, feel sorry for him. When things go well for him, you cheer, and when things go bad, you really feel for the guy. If you enjoy a vampire story then you owe it to yourself to read this book. It’s refreshingly honest and open; we are right there with Herb through all of his inner revelations.
I loved the words and phrases the author uses, he’s got a unique style for expressing humour; dry and up front. The cover definitely fit Herb well, very fitting. I thoroughly enjoyed this book and will be investing in the second in the series.
I loved the words and phrases the author uses, he’s got a unique style for expressing humour; dry and up front. The cover definitely fit Herb well, very fitting. I thoroughly enjoyed this book and will be investing in the second in the series.
October 13, 2015
A bad mosquito bite leaves diner chef Herb feeling a little under the weather. He's soon feeling worse, but at the same time becoming better at a lot of things. Could it be he's a little... undead? This book is a lot of fun, and with its three buddy bowling team reminds me of The Big Lebowski. Not all vampires are drop dead gorgeous like that guy in the movies, and Herb's going to make the best of his undeath and try and get the girl and the glory too.
The ending wasn't what I expected, but leaves an interesting setup for the sequel which I will certainly be reading.
Read on my Kindle Fire, great price for a good book.
The ending wasn't what I expected, but leaves an interesting setup for the sequel which I will certainly be reading.
Read on my Kindle Fire, great price for a good book.
August 8, 2015
Involuntary Vampire
When he unknowingly gets bitten by a mosquito that fed on the blood of a vampire's victim, changes happen to his body. At first he likes the physical power he has gained. Changing from a loser to a winner feels great. Can he live with himself feasting on people? How will he hide from the sun? He needs to keep working, wants the girl of his dreams to date him. Can he keep his secrets? This is a different vampire story.
When he unknowingly gets bitten by a mosquito that fed on the blood of a vampire's victim, changes happen to his body. At first he likes the physical power he has gained. Changing from a loser to a winner feels great. Can he live with himself feasting on people? How will he hide from the sun? He needs to keep working, wants the girl of his dreams to date him. Can he keep his secrets? This is a different vampire story.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 96 reviews