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Family Outing
From Chastity Bono, daughter of Sonny & Cher, heroine of the gay community: the first comprehensive guide to the coming-out process from the perspective of both gays & lesbians & their parents.
259 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 1998
2 people are currently reading
98 people want to read
About the author
Chastity Bono
2 books5 followersChastity Bono is the birth name of Chaz Bono -- an American LGBT rights advocate and writer and the only child from entertainer Cher's marriage to Sonny Bono.
Chastity came out as a lesbian in the mid-1990s, and in mid-2008 began to transition and now identifies as male, using the name Chaz Bono.
Chastity came out as a lesbian in the mid-1990s, and in mid-2008 began to transition and now identifies as male, using the name Chaz Bono.
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Displaying 1 - 13 of 13 reviews
September 14, 2018
I added this book to my list twenty years ago out of curiosity to see how the story of Chastity Bono’s coming out had played out in her famous family. That is discussed in the book, although not in the exhaustive detail I would have expected.
Instead, because she had begun working with a couple of Gay Rights organizations, Chastity expands her own story to include those of about a dozen other families of gay men and women and their difficulties with coming out. She also includes some guidelines and suggestions for people wanting to come out and for their families. She particularly addresses the issue of parents coming out – admitting to themselves and others that they have a family member who is a homosexual. This aspect of the book was sort of wasted on me, but I can see how it would be useful to gays and their families when they are in that position even now.
The book ends on a sad note. Chastity indicates that her father, Sonny Bono, was initially more supportive of her when she came out than her mother was. But after he went into politics, he began to officially espouse a conservative anti-gay position, and at the time of his death, they had not been speaking for some time.
This book was written in 1998, shortly after Sonny’s death. It does not cover the events of the years since then when Chastity became Chaz, which is likely another story on its own.
This was a library book.
Instead, because she had begun working with a couple of Gay Rights organizations, Chastity expands her own story to include those of about a dozen other families of gay men and women and their difficulties with coming out. She also includes some guidelines and suggestions for people wanting to come out and for their families. She particularly addresses the issue of parents coming out – admitting to themselves and others that they have a family member who is a homosexual. This aspect of the book was sort of wasted on me, but I can see how it would be useful to gays and their families when they are in that position even now.
The book ends on a sad note. Chastity indicates that her father, Sonny Bono, was initially more supportive of her when she came out than her mother was. But after he went into politics, he began to officially espouse a conservative anti-gay position, and at the time of his death, they had not been speaking for some time.
This book was written in 1998, shortly after Sonny’s death. It does not cover the events of the years since then when Chastity became Chaz, which is likely another story on its own.
This was a library book.
September 1, 2019
Brilliant piece of writing. See Chastity (as she was named at birth) go through several huge life changes. As her mother Cher asked her once, "are you gay Chastity or are you just pro-gay?" Chastity answered "pro-gay" but it was not way at all. She thought she was gay, but in the end was quite different. Read it with an open mind. Chastity/Chaz has a bold, clear, and honest way of telling a story. She sometimes paints Cher as a non-caring, career-driven mother. Cher would leave Chastity alone with weird baby sitters when she was doing a Broadway play. Just any old warm body would do for watching her child. That part was sad. Also the parts where Chastity was able to wander New York City and ride the bus and subways at quite a young age--alone and unchaperoned. That stuff really creeped me out. And she spoke with much love and affetion to her step-mother, Sonny's second wife. She was a loving and accepting woman who always listened to Chastitiy's problems, wants, and desires. Eyeopening.
February 27, 2025
This memoir follows Chastity Bono in her journey from in the closet to out. The book, published in 1998, reveals her struggles with becoming an out lesbian, and with how her decision to go public affected her mother's and father's lives as well. Initially, Cher believed that queer people led unhappy lives, in spite of knowing many gay folks personally whose lives did not seem unhappy at all. Over time she came to understand that gender identity aside, her child was still the same person.
In addition to the story of the journey, Chastity offers chapters on how different people responded to their children's coming out, and how that changed over time. It's a useful guide for persons on both sides of the story.
It was after publication that Chastity became Chas and became fully transgender, so we don't have a story about that. What we have is a simply written memoir that is engaging and probably helpful.
In addition to the story of the journey, Chastity offers chapters on how different people responded to their children's coming out, and how that changed over time. It's a useful guide for persons on both sides of the story.
It was after publication that Chastity became Chas and became fully transgender, so we don't have a story about that. What we have is a simply written memoir that is engaging and probably helpful.
February 11, 2014
It's been a long time since I've read any queer literature, so when I found this book in a free box, I decided right away that I wanted to read it.
I thought it would be the tell-all story of Chastity Bono's coming out as a lesbian (before she had gender reassignment surgery and started to publicly identify as a male named Chaz Bono), but it's actually much more than that.
It is Chastity's story of always knowing she was different and always sensing her mother's opposition to that difference, but it's also a coming out book for parents and their queer children.
(The word "queer" is mine. Bono uses "gay and lesbian." Bisexuals and transgender folk are mentioned once or twice, but are mostly left out of the discussion.)
In the first half of the book, Chastity Bono tells her story of growing up in the closet, her hesitant coming out to adults in her life, sharing the fact of her homosexuality with her father but always keeping it a secret from her mother. Interspersed throughout Bono's story, other (adult) gay men and lesbians tell the stories of their own lives, both in the closet and as they came out. The emphasis is on the reactions of these people's parents to the suspicion of and then announcement of their child's homosexuality.
In the second half of the book, parents (both Cher and the parents of the other queer folks featured in the first half of the book) get their turn to explain their reactions to their kids' coming out processes.
Throughout the book, Bono also gives tips on how to come out.
This book was published in 1998, and now Chastity is Chaz. Some would say this book is outdated, but I don't think so. Even if no one is having any trouble coming out in the 21st century (and I doubt that's the case), this book holds up as a historical document of what coming out as a gay man or lesbian was like in late 20th century America. And if folks are still having trouble coming out, this book shows what other people have gone through and how they managed to end up whole and strong and happy on the other side.
Now I want to read Chaz Bono's other book Transition: The Story of How I Became a Man.
I thought it would be the tell-all story of Chastity Bono's coming out as a lesbian (before she had gender reassignment surgery and started to publicly identify as a male named Chaz Bono), but it's actually much more than that.
It is Chastity's story of always knowing she was different and always sensing her mother's opposition to that difference, but it's also a coming out book for parents and their queer children.
(The word "queer" is mine. Bono uses "gay and lesbian." Bisexuals and transgender folk are mentioned once or twice, but are mostly left out of the discussion.)
In the first half of the book, Chastity Bono tells her story of growing up in the closet, her hesitant coming out to adults in her life, sharing the fact of her homosexuality with her father but always keeping it a secret from her mother. Interspersed throughout Bono's story, other (adult) gay men and lesbians tell the stories of their own lives, both in the closet and as they came out. The emphasis is on the reactions of these people's parents to the suspicion of and then announcement of their child's homosexuality.
In the second half of the book, parents (both Cher and the parents of the other queer folks featured in the first half of the book) get their turn to explain their reactions to their kids' coming out processes.
Throughout the book, Bono also gives tips on how to come out.
This book was published in 1998, and now Chastity is Chaz. Some would say this book is outdated, but I don't think so. Even if no one is having any trouble coming out in the 21st century (and I doubt that's the case), this book holds up as a historical document of what coming out as a gay man or lesbian was like in late 20th century America. And if folks are still having trouble coming out, this book shows what other people have gone through and how they managed to end up whole and strong and happy on the other side.
Now I want to read Chaz Bono's other book Transition: The Story of How I Became a Man.
September 6, 2014
Though some parts of this book are outdated, I feel like a lot of the information is still relevant to today. I feel like this would be a good book for parents to read, because it gives insight into the struggles for identity that many gay people have. The parents in the book are often surprised at the personal hardships their children go through by being in the closet. I feel like if parents understood, they would have more compassion for their children. It's also a good book to read for someone who is gay and planning to come out, or who has recently come out to their parents. It does a good job detailing the process it takes for a parent to accept their child, and worries that they commonly have. It can give a good frame of reference for a child to approach discussing things with their parent.
Most importantly, this book offers many messages of hope, since even parents who were initially not accepting of their children made great progress by the end. That is something gay people of all ages should be able to see.
A great deal of this book discusses Chaz Bono's coming out to his mother as a lesbian, but even so there are hints to his future coming out as a trans man. It might be interesting to see a new edition of this book written for transgender teens, showing stories of their coming out to parents and their parents learning to accept them.
Most importantly, this book offers many messages of hope, since even parents who were initially not accepting of their children made great progress by the end. That is something gay people of all ages should be able to see.
A great deal of this book discusses Chaz Bono's coming out to his mother as a lesbian, but even so there are hints to his future coming out as a trans man. It might be interesting to see a new edition of this book written for transgender teens, showing stories of their coming out to parents and their parents learning to accept them.
August 28, 2015
By encouraging more than a dozen gay and lesbian young adults (and their parents) to tell their coming-out stories along with her own, Bono transforms what could have been a tell-all celebrity memoir into an essential coming-out guide. In 1990, Sonny and Cher's 20-year-old daughter, Chastity, was outed as a lesbian by the tabloids. Although she had been aware of her sexual orientation by age 13 (and out to her parents by 18--much to Cher's dismay, at first), this public outing sent her scurrying back into the closet for five years. A relationship with an older woman, whom Chastity nursed in a losing battle with cancer, strengthened her commitment to living her life out of the closet. She publicly came out on the cover of the gay newsweekly, the Advocate, in 1995 and began working in the political arena. Bono's own story is one of many oral histories woven by the authors into a tapestry of coming-out tales that range from positive to harrowing. Despite the differing backgrounds and experiences of the protagonists, all stories end with reconciled families feeling closer than before.
The author reports that 50,000 young people attempt suicide annually, and 30% of all completed youth suicides are by gay youths. This moving, ultimately reassuring book puts a human face on these statistics and, in doing so, may save lives.
The author reports that 50,000 young people attempt suicide annually, and 30% of all completed youth suicides are by gay youths. This moving, ultimately reassuring book puts a human face on these statistics and, in doing so, may save lives.
August 24, 2011
A really good book for anyone coming out the closet, or thinking of doing it and not sure. It tells the story of not only Chastity's coming out to her parents Cher and Sonny Bono, but also the story of others who have come out.
It gets a bit boring in part 2, when she talks about parents coming out (ie now my child is gay, do I come out and tell people i'm the parent of a gay child?) which I didn't enjoy, but then i'm not a parent. I would totally recommend this book though.
It gets a bit boring in part 2, when she talks about parents coming out (ie now my child is gay, do I come out and tell people i'm the parent of a gay child?) which I didn't enjoy, but then i'm not a parent. I would totally recommend this book though.
August 27, 2013
Non-fiction. Growing up watching Sonny and Cher and seeing Chasity as a toddler, I never really believed that she was a lesbian! Book talks about her coming out, examples of others who have come out, and the struggles Cher had in coming to accept it.
March 23, 2008
Nothing too deap, but an interesting read of Chastity Bono's coming out story and childhood.
February 23, 2009
Should have read this before I came out to my family!
August 2, 2009
Really was impressed by this book. Was glad to read so many different view points and not just Chastity's. Hope she writes a new one about her life now.:)
July 17, 2009
This was okay but something I would recommend
April 30, 2015
Ahnna and I read this together and found it helpful and interesting.
Displaying 1 - 13 of 13 reviews