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Difference Between Advising And Shaming
Difference between Advising And Shaming In this notable work ,the renowned author provides essential detail in discussing key points dealing with differences that arise between the people of Sunnah , and the manners and etiquette one should acquire when differing occurs. He beautifully illustrates the difference between advising that is encouraged, and shaming that is not permitted-two topics that often become tangled and misunderstood . The author thus explains the characteristics of sincere advice and censure with a depth of clarity that will no doubt bring benefit to all, particularly those involved in active da’wah.
96 pages, Paperback
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About the author
Ibn Rajab al-Hanbali
37 books24 followersImam Ibn Rajab al Hanbali (736 - 795 AH) He was the noble Imaam, the Haafidh, the Critic, Zayn-ud-Deen ‘Abdur-Rahmaan bin Ahmad bin ‘Abdir-Rahmaan bin al-Hasan bin Muhammad bin Abil-Barakaat Mas’ood As-Salaamee Al-Baghdaadee (due to his place of birth), Al-Hanbalee (due to his madh-hab), Ad-Dimashqee (due to his place of residence and death). His kunyah was Abul-Faraj, and his nickname was Ibn Rajab, which was the nickname of his grandfather who was born in that month (of Rajab).
He was born in Baghdad in 736H and was raised by a knowledgeable family, firmly rooted in knowledge, nobility and righteousness. His father played the greatest role in directing him towards the beneficial knowledge.
Al-Haafidh Ibn Rajab, may Allaah have mercy on him, was deeply attached to the works of Shaikh-ul-Islaam Ibn Taimiyyah, for he would issue legal rulings according to them and would constantly reference his books. This is since he served as a student under Ibn Qayyim al-Jawziyyah, the most outstanding student of Shaikh-ul-Islaam Ibn Taimiyyah, may Allah have mercy on all of them. But in spite of this, he (rahimahullaah) wasn’t a blind follower or a fanatical adherent (to his teacher). Rather, he would review, authenticate, verify and follow the evidences.
Al-Haafidh Ibn Rajab, may Allaah have mercy on him passed to the realm of the Akhira in Ramadaan, 795H. He died while in Damascus.
He was born in Baghdad in 736H and was raised by a knowledgeable family, firmly rooted in knowledge, nobility and righteousness. His father played the greatest role in directing him towards the beneficial knowledge.
Al-Haafidh Ibn Rajab, may Allaah have mercy on him, was deeply attached to the works of Shaikh-ul-Islaam Ibn Taimiyyah, for he would issue legal rulings according to them and would constantly reference his books. This is since he served as a student under Ibn Qayyim al-Jawziyyah, the most outstanding student of Shaikh-ul-Islaam Ibn Taimiyyah, may Allah have mercy on all of them. But in spite of this, he (rahimahullaah) wasn’t a blind follower or a fanatical adherent (to his teacher). Rather, he would review, authenticate, verify and follow the evidences.
Al-Haafidh Ibn Rajab, may Allaah have mercy on him passed to the realm of the Akhira in Ramadaan, 795H. He died while in Damascus.
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Displaying 1 - 18 of 18 reviews
July 26, 2024
A VERY needed book. Especially for Muslims who hate on other Muslims, shaming them in the name of "advice".
The author illustrates the difference between advising and shaming, which often get mixed up. Explaining the characteristics of sincere advice that will no doubt bring benefit to all, particularly those involved in active da'wah.
A book that shows you the etiquette of advising and discourages shaming. This work also lays down some guiding principles when preparing criticisms and refutations. My favorite part of this book is how detailed it gets. I seriously highly recommend it!
A MUST READ because it's very sad seeing Muslims shame and insult others publicly when they don't even have the proper knowledge themselves.
Especially if you're someone involved in da'wah or you're known on social media. Remember, your actions REPRESENT ISLAM. Nonmuslims don't read the Quran, they read you. Your kindness may bring someone closer to Islam, and your harshness may push someone away from Islam!
Free pdf of the book: https://kalamullah.com/Books/Differen...
The author illustrates the difference between advising and shaming, which often get mixed up. Explaining the characteristics of sincere advice that will no doubt bring benefit to all, particularly those involved in active da'wah.
A book that shows you the etiquette of advising and discourages shaming. This work also lays down some guiding principles when preparing criticisms and refutations. My favorite part of this book is how detailed it gets. I seriously highly recommend it!
A MUST READ because it's very sad seeing Muslims shame and insult others publicly when they don't even have the proper knowledge themselves.
Especially if you're someone involved in da'wah or you're known on social media. Remember, your actions REPRESENT ISLAM. Nonmuslims don't read the Quran, they read you. Your kindness may bring someone closer to Islam, and your harshness may push someone away from Islam!
Free pdf of the book: https://kalamullah.com/Books/Differen...
January 9, 2023
A perfect translation/explanation of the original book and definitely a modern-day must-read
August 9, 2023
“The driving force of the evildoers for spreading evil and exposing others' faults is harshness, cruelty and the desire to disgrace his Muslim brother, which is exactly the characteristics of the Satan -who beautifies disbelief, sins and disobedience in the eyes of believers so they may become amongst the dwellers of Hellfire…”
would make this book a mandatory read for those folks that sign up on mt n other senseless social media platforms where hideous amount of shaming, slander and backbiting takes place, especially towards other muslims and respectable scholars and people of knowledge, may Allāh ﷻ protect us from ever committing such acts, ameen.
would make this book a mandatory read for those folks that sign up on mt n other senseless social media platforms where hideous amount of shaming, slander and backbiting takes place, especially towards other muslims and respectable scholars and people of knowledge, may Allāh ﷻ protect us from ever committing such acts, ameen.
September 29, 2021
In brief, this book is all about the fundamental principles. proper manners and etiquettes that the 𝓐𝓱𝓵 𝓢𝓾𝓷𝓷𝓪𝓱 𝓦𝓪𝓵 𝓙𝓪𝓶𝓪𝓪𝓱 practiced in upholding the truth and the opposition given upon them that can also be adapted in our everyday life.
Some of the righteous predecessors were asked: "𝘿𝙤 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙞𝙣𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙢 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙤𝙛 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙨𝙝𝙤𝙧𝙩𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙛𝙖𝙪𝙡𝙩𝙨?" So he replied, "[𝙄 𝙙𝙤 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙙] 𝙪𝙣𝙡𝙚𝙨𝙨 𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙖𝙞𝙢 𝙞𝙨 𝙩𝙤 𝙞𝙣𝙨𝙪𝙡𝙩 𝙢𝙚." page 47
What I learnt from the simple conversation alone is that the one who advise is necessitated to hold onto the truth (not with the evil intention to shame) and the one who is given advice to is in need to always ever accepting the truth even if it means the true is uttered by the mouth of their very own opponent.
On the other side, if we have proven someone is guilty in doing something wrong, yet you disseminate about it to others then you have backbitten that person. And if there is not found in that person wrong then you have slandered (𝓯𝓲𝓽𝓷𝓪𝓱) him (page 27). If we take things wrongly, we will be held accountable for our actions. Then, what are the appropriate and acceptable manners in advising someone? Highly recommended to read the book to know more.
In conclusion, Allah SWT doesn't allow one to justify to shame others for their wrongdoings. As Imam al-Tarmidhi witnessed the Prophet SAW once said, "𝙒𝙝𝙤𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙨𝙝𝙖𝙢𝙚𝙨 𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙗𝙧𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙖 𝙨𝙞𝙣 (𝙝𝙚 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙢𝙞𝙩𝙩𝙚𝙙), 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙙𝙞𝙚 𝙪𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙡 𝙝𝙚 𝙖𝙡𝙨𝙤 𝙝𝙖𝙨 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙢𝙞𝙩𝙩𝙚𝙙 (𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙨𝙖𝙢𝙚 𝙨𝙞𝙣) 𝙝𝙞𝙢𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛 (page 48). Therefore, those who like to shame, belittle and judge someone in the name of advising has not only mistakenly assimilated the fundamental essence of advice (𝓲𝓴𝓱𝓵𝓪𝓼) but also has against what Allah SWT has ordained His supplicants to.
Last but not least, yes I highly recommend this book to others especially considering the rapid globalization happening at the moment. People are quick to judge, insult and shaming others at the tip of their fingers and hastily propagate rumors. If we read more about Islam, we will obtain deeper understanding on what Islam truly prior about. Like the righteous predecessor, we must always prioritize the truth and seek for the truth.
Some of the righteous predecessors were asked: "𝘿𝙤 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙞𝙣𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙢 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙤𝙛 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙨𝙝𝙤𝙧𝙩𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙛𝙖𝙪𝙡𝙩𝙨?" So he replied, "[𝙄 𝙙𝙤 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙙] 𝙪𝙣𝙡𝙚𝙨𝙨 𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙖𝙞𝙢 𝙞𝙨 𝙩𝙤 𝙞𝙣𝙨𝙪𝙡𝙩 𝙢𝙚." page 47
What I learnt from the simple conversation alone is that the one who advise is necessitated to hold onto the truth (not with the evil intention to shame) and the one who is given advice to is in need to always ever accepting the truth even if it means the true is uttered by the mouth of their very own opponent.
On the other side, if we have proven someone is guilty in doing something wrong, yet you disseminate about it to others then you have backbitten that person. And if there is not found in that person wrong then you have slandered (𝓯𝓲𝓽𝓷𝓪𝓱) him (page 27). If we take things wrongly, we will be held accountable for our actions. Then, what are the appropriate and acceptable manners in advising someone? Highly recommended to read the book to know more.
In conclusion, Allah SWT doesn't allow one to justify to shame others for their wrongdoings. As Imam al-Tarmidhi witnessed the Prophet SAW once said, "𝙒𝙝𝙤𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙨𝙝𝙖𝙢𝙚𝙨 𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙗𝙧𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙖 𝙨𝙞𝙣 (𝙝𝙚 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙢𝙞𝙩𝙩𝙚𝙙), 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙙𝙞𝙚 𝙪𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙡 𝙝𝙚 𝙖𝙡𝙨𝙤 𝙝𝙖𝙨 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙢𝙞𝙩𝙩𝙚𝙙 (𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙨𝙖𝙢𝙚 𝙨𝙞𝙣) 𝙝𝙞𝙢𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛 (page 48). Therefore, those who like to shame, belittle and judge someone in the name of advising has not only mistakenly assimilated the fundamental essence of advice (𝓲𝓴𝓱𝓵𝓪𝓼) but also has against what Allah SWT has ordained His supplicants to.
Last but not least, yes I highly recommend this book to others especially considering the rapid globalization happening at the moment. People are quick to judge, insult and shaming others at the tip of their fingers and hastily propagate rumors. If we read more about Islam, we will obtain deeper understanding on what Islam truly prior about. Like the righteous predecessor, we must always prioritize the truth and seek for the truth.
May 9, 2021
I'd say this is a highly necessary book , especially in this time and age of social media where everyone feels like an authority on the Deen and per are experiencing a wave of dragging scholars and shaming them.
I assumed it would however be a general theory on shaming and advising but it's however narrowed down to shaming and advising scholars of the Deen. Regardless it is a great book and a short read at that.
I assumed it would however be a general theory on shaming and advising but it's however narrowed down to shaming and advising scholars of the Deen. Regardless it is a great book and a short read at that.
May 11, 2021
Pretty hard to read, but super worth it. I learned so much from such a small book!
October 4, 2022
A must read for people in the contemporary times. Many people in the name of advising just carry hatred towards people and their aim is to shame and embarrass people and to determine their superiority which is not at all the characteristics of noble people. Some are also engaged in shaming and attacking scholars from different maslaks with the intention of proving them wrong and boasting their knowledge when in reality they don't have any knowledge because if they had proper guidance they wouldn't engage in this kind of behavior. This book shows us the correct way to guide and advice someone that is aimed at showing the individual his wrongdoings and correcting him without shaming or disgracing him so that he realizes his mistake and try to correct it and hence avoid it in the future.The proper methods of advising that includes advising privately, publicly, practicing hajr (boycott) against a muslim and it's period and ways.
April 18, 2025
"Shaykhul Islām Ibn Taymiyyah - rahimahullāh - also said, 'When dealing with the people of sin, one must not exceed the limits prescribed by the Shari'ah, neither in hating, censuring, preventing, abandoning or chastising them. Rather, the one who does so should be told: Worry about your ownself. No harm will come to you from those who are misled, if you are truly guided, as Allāh - the Most High - said: "And do not let the hatred of a people prevent you from being just. Be just; that is nearer to righteousness." [Surah al-Ma'idah 5:8]
A well needed reminder for myself especially with how Ibn Sirin (rahimullah) reflected on how he was in great debt and imprisoned not being able to pay them off that it was because he shamed a man forty years for being bankrupt. May Allah make us sincere in everything that we do.
A well needed reminder for myself especially with how Ibn Sirin (rahimullah) reflected on how he was in great debt and imprisoned not being able to pay them off that it was because he shamed a man forty years for being bankrupt. May Allah make us sincere in everything that we do.
May 10, 2021
Indeed informing someone of their mistake in secret is a sign of sincere advice because the advisor does not seek to expose or reveal the faults of the one he advises, rather he only aims to remove a harm in which the one he advises has fallen into.”
—Ibn Rajab al-Ḥanbalī, Difference between Advising and Shaming
This is recommended to all to know more about the difference between advising that is encouraged, and shaming that is not permitted-two topics that often become tangled and misunderstood.
—Ibn Rajab al-Ḥanbalī, Difference between Advising and Shaming
This is recommended to all to know more about the difference between advising that is encouraged, and shaming that is not permitted-two topics that often become tangled and misunderstood.
October 28, 2023
One of the best books I've read in a long time.
"The believer veils (the sin of his brother) and gives sincere counsel. While the wicked rends open (the sin of his brother) and condemns him. - Ibn Ayad
"The believer veils (the sin of his brother) and gives sincere counsel. While the wicked rends open (the sin of his brother) and condemns him. - Ibn Ayad
November 11, 2024
Excellent read. Short but very informative. It’s well-written and easy to understand. Explains the importance of intention while correcting a person and the power of knowledge. How nobody is immune to mistakes. A much needed reminder for all Muslims today, especially the youth.
January 27, 2021
Absolute gem.
Its a short read written with deep understanding of the topic.
Clear and explicit.
Its a short read written with deep understanding of the topic.
Clear and explicit.
Read
November 13, 2024I read this on my kindle and found it confusing at times but that’s an issue with the formatting
November 27, 2024
A basic book which classifies backbiting, slander and shaming. The core text of Ibn Rajab is clear and concise. The commentary is a nice addition.
November 22, 2023
This book has been an enlightening experience, teaching me the stark contrast between advising and shaming. The lessons I've gathered have transformed the way I approach giving guidance, and I wholeheartedly give it a five-star rating.
The most impactful lesson is the art of overcoming opponents through three key traits. Firstly, finding satisfaction when my opponent is correct. Secondly, feeling empathy when they make mistakes. Lastly, control my tongue from uttering a word that he might dislike.
From the book I've learned that "Nasihah," in Arabic, embodies purification—guiding people towards good and cautioning against wrong. However, intentionally diminishing others, tarnishing their reputation, or exposing the ignorance of those who initially disagreed is firmly condemned.
I remembered there's the words of Saidina Ali RA, "Injustice persists not because of numerous wrongdoers, but due to the silence of the righteous." This book has empowered me to contribute positively, and I now feel equipped to advise effectively and thoughtfully.
All that is good comes from Allah, and all that is bad, wrong, and mistakes is from within myself. 🙏
The most impactful lesson is the art of overcoming opponents through three key traits. Firstly, finding satisfaction when my opponent is correct. Secondly, feeling empathy when they make mistakes. Lastly, control my tongue from uttering a word that he might dislike.
From the book I've learned that "Nasihah," in Arabic, embodies purification—guiding people towards good and cautioning against wrong. However, intentionally diminishing others, tarnishing their reputation, or exposing the ignorance of those who initially disagreed is firmly condemned.
I remembered there's the words of Saidina Ali RA, "Injustice persists not because of numerous wrongdoers, but due to the silence of the righteous." This book has empowered me to contribute positively, and I now feel equipped to advise effectively and thoughtfully.
All that is good comes from Allah, and all that is bad, wrong, and mistakes is from within myself. 🙏
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
May 22, 2024
Expected that it was for layman people but it was more oriented towards scholars .still a must read
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