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Take Off Your Shoes: One Man's Journey from the Boardroom to Bali and Back
The Eat, Pray, Love for busy executives, Take Off Your Shoes invites the reader to join a journey of self-rediscovery. If 10% Happier made you more mindful, and Wild more adventuresome, Take Off Your Shoes will ground you and help you find your soul. “The magic of Ben Feder’s narrative is that we see our own lives unfold as we travel alongside him on his journey. His poignant inner monologue touches us and emboldens us to make braver choices in our own lives. We are left richer for the voyage.”―Eric Langshur, author of the New York Times bestseller Start Here A hard-charging CEO of a large enterprise, Ben Feder discovers that he is losing the very things that sustained him over his years of business success. Unsettled by his insight and determined to rebuild family relationships and rejuvenate his sense of purpose, he risks his career on a life-altering physical and emotional journey. Together with his wife and children, Feder sets off for an exotic island on a self-prescribed sabbatical year. That experience transforms them all. The writing is honest and moving, baring the author’s innermost struggles and fears, and enticing the reader to share his quest. As Feder navigates the thrills and pitfalls of his time away, he draws us into remarkable examinations of values and priorities in adult life.
224 pages, Hardcover
First published May 1, 2018
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 82 reviews
October 27, 2018
It’s hard to describe a book like Take Off Your Shoes. It’s neither a Travelogue nor a Self-Help book. It’s a journey of self-rediscovery, an attempt to find personal fulfillment and rebuild family relationships. This book is about the trials, tribulations, joys, and miracles encountered during a journey to self-realisation.
Take Off Your Shoes is the true story of Ben Feder, an extremely successful CEO of Take-Two Interactive (the creators of the Grand Theft Auto & BioShock game series). Despite achieving tremendous success, Feder discovered that he was no longer happy in his personal life & his relationship with his wife and kids was suffering. In order to mend his family relationships and rejuvenate his life, he embarks on a life changing journey. Together with his wife and 4 children, Feder decides to live in Bali (near Indonesia) for a year, as a sabbatical. The book is about the year-long sabbatical and how that experience transforms them all. It’s about how Feder & his family re-evaluate their lives, in a totally new environment.
The story is something that a lot of people can relate to. It was interesting to read how Feder’s family managed to settle in Bali and the gradual adjustments they had to make to their set lifestyle. The way the family bonded during the sabbatical or during their trips was heart-warming. Ben’s experiences while learning yoga and drawing were illuminating. The thing I loved most about this book was that author shared his experiences in learning these skills, rather than just writing about learning them.
The whole story was told via author’s diary entries, so the narration feels a bit disjointed. There is a chapter on Yoga and the next chapter jumps to a bike trip. I wish there had been more chapters on the author’s experiences rather than his travels. Feder’s family were integral to the entire story. So, I wish there had been more chapters on how they adjusted to the new environment & evolved through the entire period instead of getting a brief mention.
Overall, I liked this book and it was very interesting to follow the author and his family through their travels and their experiences. The book was entertaining as well as enlightening. If you liked ‘Eat Pray Love’ and if you ever thought about re-evaluating your life, you would enjoy this book. (3.5/5)
Many Thanks to Netgalley, Radius Book Group and the author for the ARC.
Take Off Your Shoes is the true story of Ben Feder, an extremely successful CEO of Take-Two Interactive (the creators of the Grand Theft Auto & BioShock game series). Despite achieving tremendous success, Feder discovered that he was no longer happy in his personal life & his relationship with his wife and kids was suffering. In order to mend his family relationships and rejuvenate his life, he embarks on a life changing journey. Together with his wife and 4 children, Feder decides to live in Bali (near Indonesia) for a year, as a sabbatical. The book is about the year-long sabbatical and how that experience transforms them all. It’s about how Feder & his family re-evaluate their lives, in a totally new environment.
The story is something that a lot of people can relate to. It was interesting to read how Feder’s family managed to settle in Bali and the gradual adjustments they had to make to their set lifestyle. The way the family bonded during the sabbatical or during their trips was heart-warming. Ben’s experiences while learning yoga and drawing were illuminating. The thing I loved most about this book was that author shared his experiences in learning these skills, rather than just writing about learning them.
The whole story was told via author’s diary entries, so the narration feels a bit disjointed. There is a chapter on Yoga and the next chapter jumps to a bike trip. I wish there had been more chapters on the author’s experiences rather than his travels. Feder’s family were integral to the entire story. So, I wish there had been more chapters on how they adjusted to the new environment & evolved through the entire period instead of getting a brief mention.
Overall, I liked this book and it was very interesting to follow the author and his family through their travels and their experiences. The book was entertaining as well as enlightening. If you liked ‘Eat Pray Love’ and if you ever thought about re-evaluating your life, you would enjoy this book. (3.5/5)
Many Thanks to Netgalley, Radius Book Group and the author for the ARC.
March 17, 2018
"Take Off Your Shoes" is a non-fiction account of Ben Feder's sabbatical. I remained interested in Ben's story throughout. I loved reading about what his family was doing during the sabbatical, how it was changing who they were, and how it was bringing their family closer together. I loved reading about the Green School that the kids were attending and how refreshing of a place it sounded to be. I loved how Ben sought not only to take time off, but to strive for change, self improvement, and growth. He undertook learning yoga, meditation, and drawing in a dedicated way, which was something I found admirable. Not only did he share his experiences in learning these skills, but he brought the reader along with him, so that learned of their benefits and nuances as well. From the moment they made the decision to take a sabbatical, all through it, and once it was over, I was hooked. I loved this book. It's well written, interesting, insightful, and inspiring. Two thumbs way up for "Take Off Your Shoes" by Ben Feder. I highly recommend reading this book.
December 23, 2018
This is an interesting story of a business exec who takes a year off to travel with his family so they all can decompress and reconnect. I love memoirs like these, so I expected to enjoy Take Off Your Shoes--and I did. I wish the book flowed a bit better (instead of jumping around between topics), but I still was able to really come to know Feder and his family. Plus, I loved the descriptions of Bali. It sounds like Feder and his family are better off for their travel experiences, and I hope they've been able to keep the zen while back at home.
October 17, 2018
I received this e-book in exchange for an honest review from Netgalley.
Take Off Your Shoes is the diary of a man who, with his family, moves to Bali for a "corporate sabbatical."
I enjoyed this book a lot more than I initially anticipated. The format of Feder's story is told through stream of consciousness, so it is much less "tidy" than similar travel memoirs. After the first few chapters, though, I began to appreciate the truth behind this--not every theme is resolved in real life, and we aren't always promised dramatic chapter endings. For me, some of his stories dragged on (I am so un-interested in corporate America, and I've done enough yoga that I skipped some of his practice descriptions), but ultimately I loved seeing how his family's experiences shaped their individual growth.
I was also surprised at how much I learned from his experiences. Feder shares some great tools for mindfulness and mediation by showing the reader how he learned these skills. Because of this, he imparts this wisdom not as a patronizing teacher, but rather a fellow student. He's also very quick to credit his teachers (including the books he's read), which I found helpful.
Pros:
-The intermittent descriptions of Bali and its cultures (both national and expat) are striking. I love learning about other people and places, and I loved the descriptions of local foods, ceremonies, and landscapes--I wish there had been so much more. In case the blend of ambitious businessmen, crunchy expats, and welcoming Balinese wasn't enough culture for you, Feder also shares his family's adherence to Jewish tradition while in Bali.
-I defy you to read this memoir and be unmotivated in some way to start drawing, play a musical instrument, write, practice yoga, or one of the fifty creative experiences that Feder and his family undergo throughout their sabbatical. You'll be terrible and slightly embarrassed at how bad you are. Keep doing it.
-If you have wanderlust, reading Take Off Your Shoes will definitely fan the flame. His family travels all over, and if you're like me, you'll be making some additions to your travel list.
-The Green School is such an interesting concept, and I really enjoyed learning about their ecological projects like self-composting toilets, an eco-friendly community, and the water turbine.
Cons:
-At places, the narrative is choppy and places emphasis on weird/random pieces of information that don't really enhance the story. Of course, when I got to the end and realize the whole story was told via his diary that he kept, everything made sense. I just wish it had been edited a little more to make things easier on the reader (keeping people's names straight, less emphasis on which companies he was buying and why, and less rushing of some narratives).
-This is a personal frustration, but reading stories about long-term travel to poor places often read as very imperialistic. Unfortunately, this book wasn't an exception for me. A rich western family moves to a place with a poor economy to escape, and spends most of their money at a western school, western-owned yoga, western drawing classes, western-owned restaurants, etc. I loved that they got to know their landlord's family and became close with them, but most of the mentions of the nationals and their culture is in passing, and I felt the narrative would have gained a LOT from a fuller exploration of their host culture.
Overall, I'd recommend this book to anyone wanting a quick travel-read, or anyone wanting to know more about expat culture in Indonesia. This wasn't an earth-shattering read, but I learned some great things about re-orienting my mindset that I think will stick with me.
Take Off Your Shoes is the diary of a man who, with his family, moves to Bali for a "corporate sabbatical."
I enjoyed this book a lot more than I initially anticipated. The format of Feder's story is told through stream of consciousness, so it is much less "tidy" than similar travel memoirs. After the first few chapters, though, I began to appreciate the truth behind this--not every theme is resolved in real life, and we aren't always promised dramatic chapter endings. For me, some of his stories dragged on (I am so un-interested in corporate America, and I've done enough yoga that I skipped some of his practice descriptions), but ultimately I loved seeing how his family's experiences shaped their individual growth.
I was also surprised at how much I learned from his experiences. Feder shares some great tools for mindfulness and mediation by showing the reader how he learned these skills. Because of this, he imparts this wisdom not as a patronizing teacher, but rather a fellow student. He's also very quick to credit his teachers (including the books he's read), which I found helpful.
Pros:
-The intermittent descriptions of Bali and its cultures (both national and expat) are striking. I love learning about other people and places, and I loved the descriptions of local foods, ceremonies, and landscapes--I wish there had been so much more. In case the blend of ambitious businessmen, crunchy expats, and welcoming Balinese wasn't enough culture for you, Feder also shares his family's adherence to Jewish tradition while in Bali.
-I defy you to read this memoir and be unmotivated in some way to start drawing, play a musical instrument, write, practice yoga, or one of the fifty creative experiences that Feder and his family undergo throughout their sabbatical. You'll be terrible and slightly embarrassed at how bad you are. Keep doing it.
-If you have wanderlust, reading Take Off Your Shoes will definitely fan the flame. His family travels all over, and if you're like me, you'll be making some additions to your travel list.
-The Green School is such an interesting concept, and I really enjoyed learning about their ecological projects like self-composting toilets, an eco-friendly community, and the water turbine.
Cons:
-At places, the narrative is choppy and places emphasis on weird/random pieces of information that don't really enhance the story. Of course, when I got to the end and realize the whole story was told via his diary that he kept, everything made sense. I just wish it had been edited a little more to make things easier on the reader (keeping people's names straight, less emphasis on which companies he was buying and why, and less rushing of some narratives).
-This is a personal frustration, but reading stories about long-term travel to poor places often read as very imperialistic. Unfortunately, this book wasn't an exception for me. A rich western family moves to a place with a poor economy to escape, and spends most of their money at a western school, western-owned yoga, western drawing classes, western-owned restaurants, etc. I loved that they got to know their landlord's family and became close with them, but most of the mentions of the nationals and their culture is in passing, and I felt the narrative would have gained a LOT from a fuller exploration of their host culture.
Overall, I'd recommend this book to anyone wanting a quick travel-read, or anyone wanting to know more about expat culture in Indonesia. This wasn't an earth-shattering read, but I learned some great things about re-orienting my mindset that I think will stick with me.
March 23, 2018
Top tech exec Ben Feder was hugely successful as CEO of Take Two Interactive, publisher of the monster-hit video game, Grand Theft Auto. But his hard charging, high-performance business life was taking its toll on his personal and family well-being. That's when he made the bold and career-threatening decision to take an eight-month family sabbatical in Bali. Illuminating and inspiring, Take Off Your Shoes is Feder's brutally honest journey of self-rediscovery, his revealing, heartfelt attempt to find personal fulfillment and rebuild family relationships. Exploring brain plasticity and our ability to change our lives by changing our minds, he discovered more meaningful connections to his family and experiences. Now, could he return to his New York City reality and practice compassion and gratitude, engaging in a richer life fiercely and wholeheartedly, and still achieve substantial business success?
This book is the author's first hand account of the eight-month sabbatical he took in Bali with his family after becoming overwhelmed with the stress and pressures of holding the position of CEO at Take Two Interactive in New York City. This was a very interesting book and I think it's probably something that a lot of people can relate to, even if they don't have the luxury of taking a sabbatical in Bali.
It was interesting to read about the family's routine one they settle into Bali and the healthy changes that they make. Simple things such as yoga, meditation, drawing and a even just a healthier, fresher diet. Both Feder and his family also manage to integrate these practices in their life once they return to their life in New York City.
Overall, I really enjoyed this book and it was very interesting to follow the author and his family through their travels and the benefits that it brought to them as individuals and as a family.
Thank you to the publisher, Radius Book Group, for sending me an ARC of this book.
This book is the author's first hand account of the eight-month sabbatical he took in Bali with his family after becoming overwhelmed with the stress and pressures of holding the position of CEO at Take Two Interactive in New York City. This was a very interesting book and I think it's probably something that a lot of people can relate to, even if they don't have the luxury of taking a sabbatical in Bali.
It was interesting to read about the family's routine one they settle into Bali and the healthy changes that they make. Simple things such as yoga, meditation, drawing and a even just a healthier, fresher diet. Both Feder and his family also manage to integrate these practices in their life once they return to their life in New York City.
Overall, I really enjoyed this book and it was very interesting to follow the author and his family through their travels and the benefits that it brought to them as individuals and as a family.
Thank you to the publisher, Radius Book Group, for sending me an ARC of this book.
August 22, 2018
I would dub this “Eat Pray Love for the Corporate Set”. While it’s interesting to see how one would go about preparing a family for an extended sabbatical from the hustle-and-bustle of life in Manhattan, I feel that this book wouldn’t resonate with the average American who cannot afford (in every way) such luxury. I did enjoy the different point of view of moving a family to Bali rather than traveling solo and it was interesting to see the changes in each family member during their stay abroad. I do hope that the author and his family were able to hold on to some of the lessons they learned overseas when they were state-side again and everything inevitably returned to normal. I believe this book definitely will find its intended audience, however I think it’s difficult for the common man to empathize with Mr. Feder’s story. I gave this book three stars. I received this e-book in exchange for an honest review from Netgalley and Radius Book Group.
July 3, 2019
The title says it all. TAKE OFF YOUR SHOES recounts the transformative sabbatical in Bali that CEO Ben Feder took to save his marriage and family. The author is the ideal guide for the trip — funny, intelligent, thoughtful, spiritual — as he learns that there is more to life than success in business. Upon return to New York, he continues with meditation, painting and yoga ... practices he adopted to heal his battered psyche and body. One wonders: Could the Feders adopt me for their next family adventure? Five stars.
NetGalley and Radius Book Group, thanks for the advance copy. Opinions are mine alone.
NetGalley and Radius Book Group, thanks for the advance copy. Opinions are mine alone.
July 9, 2018
This was an interesting journey. A man takes his whole family on a sabbatical from work and New York. They visit several places but live for months in Bali. He works to learn yoga, meditation and mindfulness. He quotes a number of different people. Then he returns to New York and somewhat explains his journey integrating back into work. I felt like the book just ended. I know he is still alive but it isn't complete or doesn't express any resolution. While appreciating that his life is ongoing and I learned some new things and had new ideas, I deducted a star because it felt like a non ending.
June 19, 2025
I really enjoyed “Take Off Your Shoes,” as a look into the life of someone very different from myself. I’ve enjoyed this sort of reading since my father gave me a book that profiled the lifestyles of people in various professions when I was about high school age – several pages for each person. As a financial advisor for a relatively small number of clients (some quite wealthy by my standards) much of my work involved knowing the very personal stories that revealed the touching relationships between my clients and their money/careers.
In this context, I saw Ben Feder’s description of how he achieved great career success. He was a member of the venture capital firm’s team, with very strong allegiance to the team that chose him to lead one of their more important and successful acquisitions. This makes perfect sense in my understanding of these firms/teams. His wife made him aware that his career was separating him from his family.
Unlike my assumption for many in his career, Feder somehow sensed that she was calling him to something missing in his life. He and she formed their own team to plan and execute a sabbatical. He walked through the steps to take a leave of absence from the career team, which was not met with universal enthusiasm by those team members. At least one admired him for doing it; while acknowledging he couldn’t take the risk of losing his career position to do the same. It felt like some partners thought Feder was being disloyal by taking the resource of his skill from their team to do something for himself.
Then, there was an enjoyable description of Feder sabbatical, which has parallels to a break in my career many years ago. The activities and ways they affected Feder are well described. He changed as I changed in my exile. When he returned to his career team, it felt to me that he was not finding traction in the work anymore. Apparently, the team felt that as well. To avoid a spoiler, I will stop here and let you sort out what you think of what followed.
In this context, I saw Ben Feder’s description of how he achieved great career success. He was a member of the venture capital firm’s team, with very strong allegiance to the team that chose him to lead one of their more important and successful acquisitions. This makes perfect sense in my understanding of these firms/teams. His wife made him aware that his career was separating him from his family.
Unlike my assumption for many in his career, Feder somehow sensed that she was calling him to something missing in his life. He and she formed their own team to plan and execute a sabbatical. He walked through the steps to take a leave of absence from the career team, which was not met with universal enthusiasm by those team members. At least one admired him for doing it; while acknowledging he couldn’t take the risk of losing his career position to do the same. It felt like some partners thought Feder was being disloyal by taking the resource of his skill from their team to do something for himself.
Then, there was an enjoyable description of Feder sabbatical, which has parallels to a break in my career many years ago. The activities and ways they affected Feder are well described. He changed as I changed in my exile. When he returned to his career team, it felt to me that he was not finding traction in the work anymore. Apparently, the team felt that as well. To avoid a spoiler, I will stop here and let you sort out what you think of what followed.
August 17, 2023
I really enjoyed this book! I'm about to make some big personal decisión and their story was quite helpful.
The reading is very light and straightforward as well. So definitely recommend it
The reading is very light and straightforward as well. So definitely recommend it
June 25, 2018
Take Off Your Shoes by Ben Feder is a well written memoir of the author's struggles within the corporate mindset and a refreshing sabbatical that he led his wife and four children on in Bali. This book has a way of easing into your heart and soul. There were times where I felt that Feder's struggles and internal battles were a reflection of my own life, and there were other times where it was harder to relate. I have a hard time imagining just leaving my job and responsibilities for eight months to travel to the other side of the world and just enjoy finding myself. Reading Take Off Your Shoes did make me want to plan my own sabbatical. I actually found myself initiating discussions with my boyfriend about taking sabbaticals, or imagining life after retirement.
I found that the book moved slow in places and sped along in places, mirroring life's own movements within our souls. The author is not sharing because he is an experienced writer, he actually admits that he struggles with the writing, which makes him easier for me to relate to him.
His struggles with yoga (and mountain biking) made me laugh at first, but I so have been there... I do not think I have ever achieved the sense of peace and harmony that Feder manages with yoga and meditation, but his experiences certainly encourage me to keep trying. I like that he is real. Feder isn't afraid to show you his vulnerabilities.
What was really fascinating was his integration back into the corporate world and how he fit back in and didn't fit back at the same time. This is the one area where I wished it was longer and more expansive. By the time I got to this section in the book, I was invested in what happened to Ben (Feder) and his family. I would love to know more from his wife's perspective too on how she acclimated back into her new job. This section is the most important section for the reader because now we are looking for tips and pointers on how to change our lives if an extended sabbatical is not possible. I found valuable takeaways in this part of the book and am so thankful I had a chance to read it.
A sincere thank you to author Ben Feder, NetGalley, and publisher Radius Book Group for allowing me to review this book. As always, my opinions are my own.
I found that the book moved slow in places and sped along in places, mirroring life's own movements within our souls. The author is not sharing because he is an experienced writer, he actually admits that he struggles with the writing, which makes him easier for me to relate to him.
His struggles with yoga (and mountain biking) made me laugh at first, but I so have been there... I do not think I have ever achieved the sense of peace and harmony that Feder manages with yoga and meditation, but his experiences certainly encourage me to keep trying. I like that he is real. Feder isn't afraid to show you his vulnerabilities.
What was really fascinating was his integration back into the corporate world and how he fit back in and didn't fit back at the same time. This is the one area where I wished it was longer and more expansive. By the time I got to this section in the book, I was invested in what happened to Ben (Feder) and his family. I would love to know more from his wife's perspective too on how she acclimated back into her new job. This section is the most important section for the reader because now we are looking for tips and pointers on how to change our lives if an extended sabbatical is not possible. I found valuable takeaways in this part of the book and am so thankful I had a chance to read it.
A sincere thank you to author Ben Feder, NetGalley, and publisher Radius Book Group for allowing me to review this book. As always, my opinions are my own.
May 21, 2018
"Take off Your Shoes" is a story of one year sabbatical of Ben Feder and his family. Ben was a successful CEO of a company in New York. He is always on travel for business. He was not able to spend time with his family and was suffering on the personal front. The term "Take Off Your Shoes" is used as a metaphor in this book.
His wife, Victoria plants a seed of taking a family sabbatical for a year. Initially, it was difficult for Ben to agree to this plan. Later on entire family takes a sabbatical in Bali. In the book, Ben writes about his journey of self-discovery. He learns meditation, painting and yoga in Bali. He spends more time with his family and reconnects to his children.
The cover of the book has some calming effect. Ben and his family return to New York after a year but with a different perspective towards life. You can read more about Ben Feder on https://benfederauthor.com/author
Thank you, NetGalley for giving me an opportunity to read and review this wonderful book.
His wife, Victoria plants a seed of taking a family sabbatical for a year. Initially, it was difficult for Ben to agree to this plan. Later on entire family takes a sabbatical in Bali. In the book, Ben writes about his journey of self-discovery. He learns meditation, painting and yoga in Bali. He spends more time with his family and reconnects to his children.
The cover of the book has some calming effect. Ben and his family return to New York after a year but with a different perspective towards life. You can read more about Ben Feder on https://benfederauthor.com/author
Thank you, NetGalley for giving me an opportunity to read and review this wonderful book.
May 6, 2018
Life-affirming, not life-changing - both in content and style.
May 20, 2018
Man takes vacation. Feels need to write book.
Mildly interesting. Writing is not that good though, and after the first 100 pages, not much else happens. I'd skip it.
Mildly interesting. Writing is not that good though, and after the first 100 pages, not much else happens. I'd skip it.
August 1, 2018
Honestly, I did not read much-traveling books before. But finding Take Off Your Shoes: One Man's Journey from the Boardroom to Bali and Back by Ben Feder at Netgalley is good luck. Something that makes me directly choose this book to read is a picture of "temple" cover section. "Pura" is a temple typical of Hindu worship place in Bali. Then I realized if this is the story of Ben Feder in Bali. I can not wait to read this story, because I live in Indonesia, so I want to know what Ben Feder got from Bali.
From the beginning, Ben Feder told me that he is a perfect person. Wait, this is not pride but a life to be told. Ben Feder married Victoria and lives with his four children in New York. The family life is perfect, Ben Feder's career is at the peak, as well as full of love with Victoria. Their children: Sam, Oliver, Nava, and Rita also live well off without any economic problems. But what Ben Feder feels can then become changed. What if He suddenly performs sabbatical. Long breaks to reflect. He has a perfect career, but often feels less happy when he meets his children. He feels guilty for his family. Then Victoria gave a startling proposal. Leave a career and try to live away from New York. The decision to go to Bali is not easy. Ben Feder and Victoria take careful decisions. Because the education of their children must walk. As the color of Indonesia, I feel happy Ben Feder finally settled in Bali.
The discovery of Ben and his family
Ben Feder rented a villa in Ubud. Ubud is the perfect place to find peace. I myself feel it when going to Ubud for two or three days to reduce stress. I imagine going to Ubud, following the flow of the Ayung river, feeling the cool breeze and the beautiful green rice fields. Ben felt something to make a difference in his life. The balance between career, family life, and feelings. Honestly, throughout this book, Ben Feder has a lot to say about his career journey, such as the decision to leave his career at the top and how he is risking his career when he has to return to New York.
Yoga, art, and travel in Ubud are a perfect part of the life of the Ben Feder family. Reflections on how the life of people in Bali is very interesting. Anyone can feel the peace and start thinking about what you are living for. I believe this is the best part for Ben Feder. While the journey of art is another story of Ben's discovery. There is a process that begins when learning from several artists in Ubud. I often encounter tourists who enter the gallery, buy and go home bringing the work. But from Ben Feder, I do not know if so much of a person's reflection on art can change personal and deep thinking.
Nothing to worry about
I felt sad when it was time for Ben and his family to leave Bali. I imagine that feeling and if I can not go from Bali. But Ben's decision to return to New York is a fair thing for his life. Children should get a good education, their families in New York and careers.
The trip gave effect to the Ben Feder family all the way to New York. It is not easy to get back to the same career and it also happens. Then the growing children made Victoria want to return to a career. And Bali is becoming a more beautiful beginning for this family.
I think this the right decision for Ben Feder. There is nothing wrong with someone with a high career to go for a moment. Bali will heal you all like Ben. In the end, there is nothing to regret.
As an Indonesian
I do not know what Ben Feder hopes for this book. But as an Indonesian, I try to be honest. Ben Feder gives me a picture of what people are coming to Ubud. I live in Java Island and often spend time in Ubud. Initially, I imagined the Ben Feder family like other tourists, just spending the time to have fun and get out of the crowds of New York. But I was wrong. There is something to be achieved by Ben Feder who later also spread to his wife and child.
There are some things that make me tickled, like when Ben went cycling to Ijen. Some time ago I just go to Ijen and through the forest at night. I found a village that had just felt the pleasure of having electricity. It's like Ben's complaint when cycling on the streets of Indonesia. Not all good roads. I do not want to give criticism to anyone, but the condition is honest.
Or when Ben and the kids go to Sumatra. I've also been to Sumatra and felt the same kind of alienation as Ben felt. Then when their guide said "Sumatra is dangerous", I am not offended.
So, thank you for making Bali an important place in your life.
Also thanks to Netgalley, Ben Feder and Radius Book Group.
And check at meandthebooks.com for another review
November 30, 2020
I received this book in exchange for an honest review. You can purchase your copy here:
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B079MGJ4FS/...
I received this book two years ago, prior to its release, but I was in the middle of Netgalley lottery and had way more books to read than I had time.
I am now reading this book in the second wave of the Coronavirus or COVID 19. Right now, we have to remember that there are always two sides of the coin and you are the only one who chooses which way to see things. This has been very hard for a lot of people, including me. I have lost my major source of income, but have gained so much time with my children. Time that I will never get back. This book really puts things into perspective!
This book begins with Ben attending an important shareholder meeting in Manhattan. Ben has a high-powered Manhattan job which translates to his job owns him and he does nothing, but work. Did I mention how much stress this job comes with? Ben has four children and a doting wife, Victoria. Victoria was not only a wife, mother, but also she managed a community center and preschool. Victoria had just gotten back from a weekend retreat with her friends and they were telling her about traveling abroad with their families. Ben and Victoria always wanted to do this with their kids, but life gets in the way of plans. Victoria poses the idea of going on sabbatical. They talk out the details and decide this is something that they can possibly do. They discuss it with their oldest son, Sam and he is intrigued to get away from the busy work of his Junior year.
We are then taken on the adventure of living in another country with four kids. Ben and Victoria start their days with some yoga and there are very few opportunities for electronics, especially since there are very few WIFI hotspots. We get to see how much they learn from themselves while on their sabbatical.
I think this book was EXACTLY what I needed right now. Perspective is EVERYTHING! You can choose to see this pandemic as the worst thing EVER or you can think of it as taking a Sabbatical to get your head straight, do all of those things that you said you would get around to. How clean is your house, anyway? I am sure even the cleanest house has a cobweb here and there! I have taken this time to clean the tops of the door frames. When was the last time you vacuumed those bad boys? You can always see another point of view, even when it is so horrible. Until this pandemic is over, you will be finding me in Puerto living room or Puerto Dining room or one of the other exotic locations in my house. We live in the cold Northeast, but you can always pump up the heat and have a summer luau in your living room with your kids. There are so many creative things that you can do to make it fun for the kids. Facetime, Zoom and the million other platforms that you can spend time on camera with your friends safely. If we all do our part and stay safe and distant, we can beat this and get back from our sabbaticals. This book has reminded me how grateful I am to have everything that I have, it may be small, but family is everything. Friends that check on you, despite you really not wanting to talk to them because you are consumed in your funk, THAT IS EVERYTHING! People who will drop off paper towels to you knowing you have not been able to find any! This is the time to be extra kind. Throw a dance party on someone who is in a funk’s yard. Bring a boombox and just play tunes while they wave from inside. They need it!
January 28, 2023
Ben Feder is a high-powered executive in New York City who realizes that he is losing touch with his family because he's working too much, so his wife convinces him to take a sabbatical. The family moves to Bali for 6 months and experiences a new culture, and Ben is able to get more in touch with himself and figure out what he really values and how to live a more intentional life.
I liked the concept of this book. I like that this man wanted to make sure he didn't miss his children's growing-up years and wanted to feel more connected with his wife. It was cool to hear about their experience living in a place and culture very unlike their own (and mine) and the things they learned and enjoyed. I appreciated his descriptions of learning to meditate because I've tried it a few times and got distracted and felt like I failed. He describes his attempts to meditate, the distraction he faces, and how he gets back to what he's trying to accomplish. For some reason, the way he described it made more sense to me than other instructions about meditating I've read or listened to. I even appreciated having a different perspective just because their family is Jewish and I am not, so their experience was different than I would have had (I never thought about how hard it might be to find kosher food when traveling or living abroad).
That being said, I just found it hard to connect with Ben and his experience at times. Neither my husband nor I are CEOs or any other sort of seven-figure-earning careers. We could never afford to live in Manhattan or send our kids to private school, much less take a break from work for six months to live across the world, by way of a two-week safari in Africa on the way there and almost two months of traveling around southeast Asia on the way home. His way of life was just so far removed from mine that I couldn't connect with him. His epiphany with trying to draw fell flat for me as well because I haven't experienced it and so it just didn't make sense to me the way it did for him.
Overall, it's a great concept, and I'm so happy for him and his family that they had this amazing experience. But the book was just fine for me. Not bad, but not great. Overall clean other than one f-word (when they first arrived in Bali and he wondered what on earth they had gotten themselves into, haha). Thanks to NetGalley for the free ebook.
I liked the concept of this book. I like that this man wanted to make sure he didn't miss his children's growing-up years and wanted to feel more connected with his wife. It was cool to hear about their experience living in a place and culture very unlike their own (and mine) and the things they learned and enjoyed. I appreciated his descriptions of learning to meditate because I've tried it a few times and got distracted and felt like I failed. He describes his attempts to meditate, the distraction he faces, and how he gets back to what he's trying to accomplish. For some reason, the way he described it made more sense to me than other instructions about meditating I've read or listened to. I even appreciated having a different perspective just because their family is Jewish and I am not, so their experience was different than I would have had (I never thought about how hard it might be to find kosher food when traveling or living abroad).
That being said, I just found it hard to connect with Ben and his experience at times. Neither my husband nor I are CEOs or any other sort of seven-figure-earning careers. We could never afford to live in Manhattan or send our kids to private school, much less take a break from work for six months to live across the world, by way of a two-week safari in Africa on the way there and almost two months of traveling around southeast Asia on the way home. His way of life was just so far removed from mine that I couldn't connect with him. His epiphany with trying to draw fell flat for me as well because I haven't experienced it and so it just didn't make sense to me the way it did for him.
Overall, it's a great concept, and I'm so happy for him and his family that they had this amazing experience. But the book was just fine for me. Not bad, but not great. Overall clean other than one f-word (when they first arrived in Bali and he wondered what on earth they had gotten themselves into, haha). Thanks to NetGalley for the free ebook.
October 26, 2018
I really enjoyed this memoir of a family who took a sabbatical, to reconnect with each other in Bali.
Ben Feder, was an executive in NYC, always busy, stressed or traveling, with little time to devote to his wife and kids. Realizing what was happening, he decided along with his wife, that they needed to make a change or lose contact with their families, goals, wishes, concerns, aspirations, etc., so they decided to search for a place where they could spend 6 months to a year, and decide on Bali in Indonesia.
First they traveled to Africa, and went on a safari, and then off to Bali to start off their new life for awhile.
It was a lot of fun to see how they each adapted to their new lives, one that was at a snail pace compared to their lives in New York city.
The children went to the Green School, a completely sustainable school whose main focus is ecology and improving the world, hopefully creating Green Leaders. Here the children experience a way of living, which was so foreign to them, yet what became a very important lesson, for all of them.
The parents each had things they were interested in doing, jointly biking and yoga. The author also became interested in the arts, and would take drawing lessons, visit artist groups and was able to get into and enjoy a different way of life than what he was used to.
When the time came for them to leave, they all had a hard time leaving their interest and friends.
This is a great story to show how a little bit of time away, doing something different, can really change your life.
I would like to thank NetGalley and AuthorBuzz and Radius Book Group for the ARC of this book
Ben Feder, was an executive in NYC, always busy, stressed or traveling, with little time to devote to his wife and kids. Realizing what was happening, he decided along with his wife, that they needed to make a change or lose contact with their families, goals, wishes, concerns, aspirations, etc., so they decided to search for a place where they could spend 6 months to a year, and decide on Bali in Indonesia.
First they traveled to Africa, and went on a safari, and then off to Bali to start off their new life for awhile.
It was a lot of fun to see how they each adapted to their new lives, one that was at a snail pace compared to their lives in New York city.
The children went to the Green School, a completely sustainable school whose main focus is ecology and improving the world, hopefully creating Green Leaders. Here the children experience a way of living, which was so foreign to them, yet what became a very important lesson, for all of them.
The parents each had things they were interested in doing, jointly biking and yoga. The author also became interested in the arts, and would take drawing lessons, visit artist groups and was able to get into and enjoy a different way of life than what he was used to.
When the time came for them to leave, they all had a hard time leaving their interest and friends.
This is a great story to show how a little bit of time away, doing something different, can really change your life.
I would like to thank NetGalley and AuthorBuzz and Radius Book Group for the ARC of this book
February 1, 2019
I finished reading this one yesterday, but it took a little bit to mull over both the contents and my feelings about the book. I am deeply fascinated by the concept of just quitting everything one day and going on an adventure. Admittedly, that was kind of why I picked up the book. He calls it a sabbatical, I call it an adventure.....but the concept is pretty much the same thing in my eyes. I'm happy that he and his family were able to do something like this because they had the means to do so (98% of us simply *don't*), but at the same time I often felt there was so much humble bragging within the book that I just could not overlook it. "Look at these poor people! They are poor but still happy!", "Look! I'm an artist now!" kind of things. At the same time, I felt that we often forget self care and we get entirely too wrapped up in our jobs and our lives to fully appreciate all that is out there in the world. Who wouldn't love to learn to meditate and just *BE* for a while? Who wouldn't love to learn a new skill such as drawing or painting (it's a goal that I set for myself long before I read this book)? The underlying message was definitely a good one and it's definitely one that we often overlook, but there was just something else within the book that I just didn't like and I am not able to put my finger on exactly what it is. Maybe I simply wasn't the target audience and I am just too plebeian to understand? I'm not sure.
February 27, 2019
I think books can be “good” and worthy of 4 stars for many reasons. They can be particularly relevant for your life, which improves the rating because the author’s message really resonates with you. It can be well written and easy to read, which this book was. You can learn something new about yoga, meditation, art, sabbaticals, Bali, and how one person left the corporate world and returned different. For all these reasons, I recommend the book. I did not give it 5 stars because I guess I wanted something more regarding the lessons learned, the lasting changes, would he do it again and for longer, etc. The author does elaborate on all these topics but not in a deep enough manner that I was hoping for. I think anyone picking up this book has some serious thought about taking a sabbatical and therefore wants answers to a whole host of questions, some were answered, a few were not or glossed over. The book definitely makes you think about brain plasticity and the benefits of engaging in new hobbies to change neural pathways.
April 14, 2019
A compelling and easy read for corporate strivers. Not a deeply thought out or executed work of philosophy, but a practical starter book on other approaches to living and making a living. I enjoyed his journey in Bali and his changes returning from his sabbatical, but was turned off in the beginning chapters and felt he obfuscated his ‘success’ with a software (Grand theft auto) that definitely did not add any good qualities to world and did much harm. I believe he is a happier person for leaving the corporate world and taking this journey. He appears to have achieved a better career, improved family relationships, and more fulfilled self. He was quite brave to write publicly and I, the reader, appreciate his efforts. I liked the way he shared that process at the end of the book. I recommend for any corporate, government leader to read and learn about other effective approaches - the world does not benefit from winners and losers. Only winners and winners. And there is so much winning to do.
December 14, 2019
"Take off Your Shoes" is a story of one year sabbatical of Ben Feder and his family.
Ben was a successful CEO of a company in New York. He is always on travel for business. He was not able to spend time with his family and was suffering on the personal front. The term "Take Off Your Shoes" is used as a metaphor in this book.
His wife, Victoria plants a seed of taking a family sabbatical for a year. Initially, it was difficult for Ben to agree to this plan. Later on entire family takes a sabbatical in Bali. In the book, Ben writes about his journey of self-discovery. He learns meditation, painting and yoga in Bali. He spends more time with his family and reconnects to his children.
The cover of the book has some calming effect. Ben and his family return to New York after a year but with a different perspective towards life. You can read more about Ben Feder on https://benfederauthor.com/author
Thank you, NetGalley for giving me an opportunity to read and review this wonderful book.
Ben was a successful CEO of a company in New York. He is always on travel for business. He was not able to spend time with his family and was suffering on the personal front. The term "Take Off Your Shoes" is used as a metaphor in this book.
His wife, Victoria plants a seed of taking a family sabbatical for a year. Initially, it was difficult for Ben to agree to this plan. Later on entire family takes a sabbatical in Bali. In the book, Ben writes about his journey of self-discovery. He learns meditation, painting and yoga in Bali. He spends more time with his family and reconnects to his children.
The cover of the book has some calming effect. Ben and his family return to New York after a year but with a different perspective towards life. You can read more about Ben Feder on https://benfederauthor.com/author
Thank you, NetGalley for giving me an opportunity to read and review this wonderful book.
December 27, 2020
A simulating and provocative read, from someone with the courage to remain engaged with issues many of us perilously ignore. Take Off Your Shoes recounts a CEO's effort to restore meaning to his life and his relationships by embarking on a year-long family adventure in Bali. Feder writes honestly and candidly about his family's experience living a radically different lifestyle and his personal search for contentment and tranquility. I was taken by Feder's chronicle of his return home. He recounts his struggle to maintain perspective and admits that he continues to grapple with many of the issues that prompted his journey in the first place. I suppose that's the lesson in this memoir. Although many of life's issues ultimately are not resolvable, it remains important to be engaged continually in the quest for deeper insight and understanding. All in all, an illuminating and thoughtful read, very highly recommend.
September 2, 2018
Ben and Victoria are wanting to take a sabbatical fron their life in New York with the busy schedules not only for the two of them but for their four children. They select Bali as it would be completely different from the life they are living now. At first the kids are not sure they want to do this but eventually the whole family gets into the mood and leave New York as winter is coming. Ben wants to make changes in his thinking as well as to reconnect with his children and wife. The children go to a school completely different from what they have known. Through meditation and yoga ben does work on his thinking and feeling. He takes up art which is completely different for him. He explains the places they go and the things they see. He talks about the books he reads and hoe they help him. A very interesting book.
October 30, 2019
It was inspiring to look at how the writer sought meaning in life through art, meditation, and yoga. I was also intrigued by the children's experiences in the Green School. I appreciated the fact that the writer addressed the difficulties of integrating lessons he had acquired during his time in Bali while readjusting back to the usual hustle and bustle of life in a city. All in all, it was a nice memoir inspiring me to take my own journey someday, be it through physically travelling to some place or through changing my own lifestyle and mindset (perhaps I felt I was particularly able to relate to the writer since I had recently started doing daily yoga practice). However, the main drawback of this memoir was the writing style, which made everything sound much more dull than things probably were.
May 14, 2018
I enjoyed this book very much. It is about a top exec at "grand theft auto" [ugh! thankfully he never once addressed the product of his company], who purposefully and thoughtfully took a sabbatical from the constant striving of top exec-ness so he could re-establish his relationship with his wife and kids. They moved to Bali for something around one year. Kids attended "Green School" - barefoot and artistic - and this book describes how this uptight, success monger turned to art and yoga and mountain-biking and hanging out with family and friends. It is well written. Inspirational. Not too sappy with platitudes.
August 16, 2019
A well written book, that for me, lacked soul. I found the author overly analytical about his time on Bali, seemingly always quoting life coaches, questioning his life at every turn, but never truly simply living in the moment and taking in all Bali has to offer, especially its people, culture and rhythm which sets it apart from the rest of the world and makes it very special . Still, it was an interesting read. It took much courage to do what he and his family did. To become unshackled from the golden handcuffs, if only for a brief time.
September 2, 2018
This book hooked me in the reading process. The Ben's experience was great and take the reader throw a transformative trip.
But:
* it have lack of connection between chapters.
* Some characters have non introduction and others had been leave behind without a clear closesure.
* The end isn't a really end.
But:
* it have lack of connection between chapters.
* Some characters have non introduction and others had been leave behind without a clear closesure.
* The end isn't a really end.
March 7, 2019
Excellent!
This book was revealed to me as I searched for my own space of solace balanced with grit and drive. It expanded my curiosity of wanting to know more about neuroplasticity and being in the now. Very well written, and thought provoking. Thank you for sharing the gifts you learned Mr. Feder!
This book was revealed to me as I searched for my own space of solace balanced with grit and drive. It expanded my curiosity of wanting to know more about neuroplasticity and being in the now. Very well written, and thought provoking. Thank you for sharing the gifts you learned Mr. Feder!
January 26, 2021
A nice memoir from someone who took the step so many would like to take. Appreciated the front row seat to his sabbatical, finding myself a little jealous...but also respecting that he seemed to take full advantage of the experience in a way that maybe we can still learn something vicariously from his experience.
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