Deviation: A Long Short Story

by Mark Paxson

Two brothers are doing what they always do. Sitting in a diner ogling the waitress. Mickey is philosophizing. Johnny talking smack. Their dad is the President of the local Humane Society. Mom is a bible-thumping street preacher who just got arrested. Again. Deviation is a dialogue driven story about Mickey and Johnny as they discover the truth of their family and themselves Their mother has gone slightly off. Their father is a whole lot of things they never imagined. The discussion that follows brings their family's secrets spilling out in a weekend of discovery.

If you don't like f-bombs, don't read this story. If you don't like sexualized content, don't read this story. If you want to read a bit of a lark about two brothers getting through the destruction of what once was a family, read this story.

51 pages, Kindle Edition

Published February 17, 2018

About the author

I've spent my life reading and always wanted to write. About ten years ago, I started One Night in Bridgeport, a legal thriller. Bridgeport is now available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon, and in all other e-reader formats on Smashwords.

Writing that story opened the door to writing. I've since written about 45 short stories -- with two stories published by The First Line and two at www.toasted-cheese.com.

Weed Therapy, about a man's journey to find happiness, is my next novel ready to be published. And, after that, I have three partially completed novels ready for my attention.

In my other life, I'm an attorney. I have two teenagers about ready to start college. I cook, bake, garden ... and read.

You can keep up with my writing news at www.markpaxson.com, and read my latest thoughts on virtually everything else at www.kingmidgetramblings.wordpress.com.

Reviews

[Pamela Beckford · Rating 4 out of 5]

Nearly all dialogue. Tough to write I would assume but it was pulled off well. I did have a little trouble in the beginning figuring out which brother was speaking but it came together for me.

[Kevin Brennan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Dialogue-rich “Deviation” reminds me in many ways of a two-man Sam Shepard play in which brothers scrimmage for the moral high ground in the face of a grim family history. Here it's Mickey and Johnny, each bringing his own view of the world to bear on an unusual predicament: their mom has landed herself in jail. Their father's definitely not blameless in how it all developed, but the brothers haven't seen things quite the same way as they grew up. Their habitual Friday night diner date, we imagine, has always been full of waitress-ogling and profanity-laced ribbing, but this one feels different.

Paxson does a good job painting the brothers' relationship. I felt like I've seen these guys hunched at the bars of diners and roadside taverns, working on their pasts along with their beers. They jab and joke and threaten and forgive – they're linked whether they like it or not.

No plot spoilers here, but I will say that Paxson managed to surprise me more than once in this “long short story.”

For the price, “Deviation” is a definite winner. Grab a copy and imagine which of your favorite actors should play the bros.

[John Anthony · Rating 3 out of 5]

The story is almost totally told in dialogue, largely between two brothers, Mickey and Johnny. They meet up at the same greasy spoon every Friday night and order the same things each time. Their relationship is in a bit of a rut. It won’t be after this! That’s the positive take from this. The negative for me was not always knowing which brother was doing the talking.

Their perceptions of home life and their parents is different, as is their attitude to Life in general. We see what we want to see – eg abuse in the home.

A grudging 3*