Shadow Sisters

by Shelley Davidow

During the terrifying years of Apartheid in South Africa, Shelley Davidow’s family was a crime. At a time when it was illegal for black and white people to live together, Shelley’s social activist parents took in Rosie, an abandoned black three-year-old. Rosie grew up as a beloved daughter and sister in a white household. Against the backdrop of racist laws and ever-present threats of violence, Shelley’s parents did all they could to provide a safe, happy home for their five children. But when Rosie was sixteen, devastating truths came to light, shattering the family’s understanding of the past. In this haunting memoir, Shelley Davidow unravels the memories of her early life, searching for truth and reconciliation. Shadow Sisters leaves us with a deeper understanding of family love – but what if, sometimes, love is not enough?

Genres: Africa, Biography, Nonfiction

264 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2018

Reviews

[Cass Moriarty · Rating 5 out of 5]

Shadow Sisters (UQP 2018) is the new memoir by author Shelley Davidow, who mesmerised readers with her previous haunting non-fiction life account, Whisperings in the Blood (UQP 2016). I knew before I began this book that it was about Shelley’s life growing up as a white South African, and that it featured the tale of her sister, Rosie, who became a cherished part of her family despite her different skin colour. But what I didn’t know – or didn’t expect – was the twists and turns this tale would take, the emotive and disturbing themes it traverses, and the unlikely sympathies it evokes for a rainbow nation of discordant characters.
Growing up in a privileged white family under the rule of Apartheid, Shelley Davidow was always torn: between her social activist parents and the strict laws governing her country; between her youthful compassion regardless of race and the controlling racist regime; and between her love for her native land and her abhorrence at its treatment of its First Peoples. She was raised in a house of love, a home filled with siblings, with the addition of generations of black people who traditionally worked as household maids and servants, but whom she came to recognise as family. She was raised by Leena and considered her as an aunt or a grandmother. And when Leena became too old and frail to work, Shelley’s family continued to support her, both financially and through inviting her to remain living with them (despite this form of contact being officially illegal). Through Leena, the family is introduced to an abandoned girl, three-year-old Rosie, whom they welcome into their home and their hearts with their usual warmth and kindness. Rosie is raised as just another sibling; skin colour means nothing to children.
But Rosie’s childhood is tortured by scars that run deep, many of which Shelley doesn’t discover until years later, after Rosie has left the family, having seemingly abandoned them to go back to her roots. This is the story of the betrayal enacted on Rosie, both wittingly and unwittingly; by those who meant the best for her, and those who meant to abuse her. It is also Shelley’s story – her burgeoning adolescence, her awakening of desire, the inappropriate relationships that marked her entry to womanhood, her travels far and wide in search of a safe place, her romance with a PhD student (now her lifelong partner), her conflicted feelings on motherhood and her nevertheless depthless love for her son.
This story took many unexpected turns. I didn’t foresee Shelley’s tumultuous personal relationships and her struggle with an eating disorder. I didn’t expect the fresh remembrances of childhood, punctuated by incidents and memories sharply familiar to my own experience of that time period. And while I expected a detailed and difficult exploration of race relations, I didn’t foresee the complexities and nuances that Shelley navigates around culture, language, customs, family ties, intergenerational trauma, grief and sacrifice. I was truly moved by this book, and awed by the way in which Shelley manages to dissect complicated racial history and enmeshed interpersonal relations both empathetically and compassionately. This is perhaps truest towards the end of the book, when she regards her own white privilege, even to the point of telling this story, wishing it to have an ending that correlates with her prism or perspective of the world, and trying to understand how and why her own beliefs about what is right and true may not accord with others.
This story is poignant, sad, funny, perceptive and engaging. It is honest, frankly so, even when honesty is not pretty. It examines not only reconciliation but the damaging forces that precede it. It is a book of violence, and of violent acts, of self-sacrifice and the indomitability of the human spirit. It is a search for truth, and a search for an understanding of that truth. And it all plays out in the wild and beautiful landscape of the African continent. The last images in the book – of grainy old photographs, of massacres and stolen children, of broken stories and the confluence of narratives from different perspectives – will stay with me.

[America Hart · Rating 5 out of 5]

The story of this South African family shows that people's lives and loves can and do cross borders – despite the ongoing efforts of those who would wish to police borders and maintain boundaries between people of different races, ethnicities, religions, etc. Despite the stories of a few high-profile figures in Southern Africa, the rich and complex stories of multi-racial families in South Africa for the most part have yet to be told. "Shadow Sisters" is one such compelling story, and one that held my interest from start to finish. I read the book in one day. It is written without any scenes of gratuitous violence even though South Africa, during Apartheid and after, has historically been a place with a great deal of violence. The author tells her personal story about growing up under Apartheid in South Africa as a white African, and also the story of her relationships with her sister Rosie and "grandma," "Gogo", the black South Africans who become part of her family. The story is simply about a multi-racial family that forms despite man-made boundaries and the rules of Apartheid – out of compassion and love.

[Gayle · Rating 5 out of 5]

Outstanding! Quite possibly could easily become one of my favourite books I’ve read.
I picked this book up at my library, sometime after I heard the author Shelley Davidow talk at Brisbane City Library. She was captivating then speaking of her life story and I have discovered as much as her written work.
I was in tears at the end.

[Lisa · Rating 4 out of 5]

Shelley Davidow was born and educated in South Africa but now lives in Queensland where she teaches education and creative writing at the University of the Sunshine Coast. Throughout an international career, she has published widely, including poetry; fiction for adults, YA and children; and non-fiction on a variety of topics. Shadow Sisters is her absorbing memoir of life in an activist family under the Apartheid regime in the 1970s and 80s.

It is an extraordinary story. The blurb describes it well:

During the terrifying years of Apartheid in South Africa, Shelley Davidow’s family was a crime. At a time when it was illegal for black and white people to live together, Shelley’s social activist parents took in Rosie, an abandoned black three-year-old. Rosie grew up as a beloved daughter and sister in a white household. Against the backdrop of racist laws and ever-present threats of violence, Shelley’s parents did all they could to provide a safe, happy home for their five children. But when Rosie was sixteen, devastating truths came to light, shattering the family’s understanding of the past.

…

The hero of this story is Shelley’s mother, who daily ventures into a black township to teach in school founded by Franz Auerbach, who was a white member of the ANC. This was when there were widespread riots against the segregated education system which fitted non-whites only for menial work.

… an outbreak of education riots exploded in the townships. Black children and teens protested their lot. During the early 1980s, they had to contend with underqualified teachers (some Bantu Education teachers only had the equivalent of Grade Ten), a limited curriculum, crowded classrooms with 60 to 100 children in a room. Beatings and intimidation by teachers and principals were the only form of behaviour management for thousands of youngsters. Everything that came courtesy of the Apartheid regime insisted that these children stay in positions as ‘hewers of wood and drawers of water’.

While the Fairvale students learned three foreign languages and strolled across well-kept grounds in the northern suburbs, the army moved into classrooms in Alexandra and Soweto. Teachers taught with armed soldiers in their rooms. Discipline now maintained through the barrels of guns. (p.27)

To read the rest of my review please visit https://anzlitlovers.com/2018/08/08/s...

[CJ Austin · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was engrossed by the setting of this story. It seemed a very authentic tale of growing up under apartheid in South Africa from a white perspective. I could tell it was written from the heart. It is full of empathy and understanding. It encompases a very topical subject of an older man in a position of power and influence and a teenage girl.

[Jo Sparrow · Rating 5 out of 5]

Shadow Sisters is a moving read that captures so much of a dark time in South Africa’s history through the lens of Shelley and her family. I remember watching and reading about Apartheid in the news as a girl and it seemed so removed from my experience in Australia. Shelley has a way of opening our eyes to the realities of Australia’s history with our first Australians and she keeps me thinking long after I’ve finished reading.

[T.M. Hall · Rating 5 out of 5]

Somehow Davidow has created a memoir that draws you into the story as much as any fiction novel would. I was inside her world, lost in her descriptions of South Africa; it's beauty, it's horrors, it's history. Raw, honest, horrifying yet at times enchanting, Davidow has done an amazing job of painting a realistic view of how apartheid affected every South African, white or black, adult or child.

[Helen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Foe anyone who has lived in South Africa and felt the pain of having to leave, this is a heartachingly beautiful book to read. It is beautifully and evocatively written as "Africa takes everything back into itself". Describing the tragedy of living in a divided nation against the backdrop of racist laws, the constant threat of violence Shelly and her three siblings + one grow up in a loving home, with parents who were social activists fighting for social and economic equality. Sadly by the late 20's, in the author's words - the great equaliser turned out to be poverty. Crime, corruption and fear have devasted the country. Aside from the political and social situation, this is a story about love, love for the family and for each other. A remarkable read - 'Cry The Beloved Country' indeed.

[Pam Barton · Rating 4 out of 5]

A fascinating memoir by a girl growing up with a liberal family in the 1980s in Johannesburg. Her mother and step father were social activists who tried to make a difference and were very supportive of Leena[the family housekeeper} and her grandaughter who lived with them from the age of 3. Sadly their hopes and dreams for a new South Africa were slowly eroded once the euphoria of Mandela had waned, corruption became rife and the country deteriorated.
I could identify with so many of her feelings about the injustices of the apartheid era and loved her many references to things that i remember - games of Stuck in the Mud, cosmos, maids uniforms, kiahs in the back gardens, long hours and shocking pay, the separation of families, the unfair education system, slate floors, African sunsets, the smell of smoke in the air etc.

[Bernice · Rating 3 out of 5]

How painful to know that in order to survive you have to leave family, friends and country and start again in a new country. Shelleys parents were both committed to doing what felt right regardless of the repercussions. It was against the law for whites to live with people of colour or to mix openly in any environment. Life was tough for those with limited education and despite well meaning groups attempting to help educate those less fortunate the environment worked against them with violence and officials determined to stomp out integration. Shelleys family lived life on the edge on a daily basis but refused to conform.

[dorothy gliksman · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read “The Girl With the Violin”, thought the writing beautiful, so followed up with “Shadow Sisters”.
Again the writing was sublime, the story captivating and I was sorry when it came to an end.
“The Girl With the Violin” and “Shadow Sisters” have a similar thread in their storyline, which is ok but hopefully, when the next novel comes out, it won’t be there.
Dorothy.

[My Escalinda · Rating 5 out of 5]

Shelley Davidow's book is captivating and deeply moving.

It tells the powerful story of Susanna Friedman, a young Jewish Australian violinist who embarks on a journey to Berlin with a once-in-a-lifetime scholarship, seeking to fulfill her dreams and reach new heights.
@geometry dash meltdown

[Tracey Taylor · Rating 5 out of 5]

Shelley writes with compassion, honesty and humility of her experiences growing up in Apartheid South Africa. Her family is open hearted and courageous, as is Shelley. This book is inspiring, written in a style that challenges you to dare not close the book until the last page is devoured.

[Sophia · Rating 4 out of 5]

Authors autobiography of growing up in South Africa, experiencing Apartheid and the optimism followed by disappointment when it ended. She then moved to Australia. I found it informative and more personal and human compared to just reading about Apartheid.

[Fadise · Rating 5 out of 5]

Good job! Join the skibidi toilet in their quest to take over the world, or fight against them as the Camera Men in this action-packed TPS game.

[Fisaso · Rating 5 out of 5]

thanks