Girl Boner: The Good Girl's Guide to Sexual Empowerment

by August McLaughlin

"What about girl boners?"

The innocent curiosity of eleven-year-old August McLaughlin set her on a path no one saw coming. She's spent much of her adult life committed to making sure these curiosities are broadly addressed or, better yet, prevented.

In a culture where female sexual empowerment is used to sell everything from sex toys to soap, most early sex ed bypasses pleasure, and women continue to be "slut" or "prude"-shamed. Because of that, determining our own paths and defining what such empowerment really means in our lives is vital.

In Girl Boner: The Good Girl's Guide to Sexual Empowerment, August guide readers through just that. A spicy blend of personal narrative, in-depth reporting, and inspiration, Girl Boner is the go-to companion for "good girls" seeking the richer, more authentic, and pleasure-filled lives they deserve through embracing their bodies and sexuality.

Genres: Nonfiction, Sexuality, Feminism, Health, Adult, Self Help

325 pages, Hardcover

First published August 7, 2018

About the author

August McLaughlin is a journalist, author and host/producer of Girl Boner Radio, which was named “one of the best sex podcasts you should be listening to” by Romper and one of the top feminist podcasts by Bellesa.

Her articles and expertise have been featured in Cosmopolitan, The Washington Post, O: The Oprah Magazine, DailyOM, Forbes, Shape and more. August has presented for TEDx Women and the Centers for Disease Control headquarters, ghostwritten hundreds of works for gynecologists and physicians. She’s also a trauma-informed certified sex educator with related expertise in eating disorders and ADHD.

Reviews

[Lucy Banks · Rating 5 out of 5]

I received a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

A frank, ultra-unabashed exploration into female sexuality - with plenty of pointers!

Okay, so I'll come clean. I'm one of 'those' girls. You know, the ones who giggle nervously through sex ed class, blush at the mere mention of any 'naughty' word, and basically should have been born in the Victorian era.

However, this is very at odds with my feminist outlook, and my deep-seated belief that women should fully own their sexuality and be empowered by it. As such, I seized the chance to scoop up this book and start bringing my 'ooh matron' prudery into line with my forward-thinking attitudes.

What we have here is a book that talks frankly about sex - but I'm guessing you knew that already. It operates on a number of levels - providing advice and guidance on several different sexual topics (ranging from the serious and emotional, like rape; to to the light-hearted and playful!). There are also several fascinating interviews in there - with women, and people who identify as women. The author has no problem with discussing her own sexual experiences too, which she does in a refreshingly frank, down-to-earth way.

And that's really the good thing about this book; because as I was reading it and turning pink, I found myself questioning why I was pinkening (is this a word? It really should be) and how very silly it was that sexual matters are so taboo. Perhaps it's not so bad in the US, where the author is from, but my goodness in the UK, we all titter anxiously if anyone even hints at discussing their sex life, unless it's a very, very close friend. Ha!

So, hooray for August McLaughlin and her sexual revolution - let's hope she leads the way in challenging stereotyped, outdated notions about women's 'role' in bed, and in getting more women to own their sexuality. Right on!

[Stine Hopsdal · Rating 5 out of 5]

*free copy received from netgalley in exchange for an honest review*

This was such a fun and interesting read!

I find that the trick to writing a good non-fiction book is the balance between being informative and being entertaining. Too often I read non-fiction books that are too heavy on the information without being interesting. In other words; boring. This book is not boring. At all!

Girl Boner is a book about getting to know your own body, and that basically everything is okay and normal. I would have loved to have read this 15 years ago, or even 20 years ago when I was just starting puberty. I would have learned so much, and I think I also would have nipped many a myth in the bud, before they could get a hold of my pubescent brain.

This book is written in quite a caotic way, but I think that's what makes it so interesting in my eyes. Even if it has its chapterized contents, such as a chapter on rape and trafficing (that one hurt to read, I'll tell you), and a chapter on mental health, it jumps back and forth within these loose frames to make it a very pleasurable read.

There are insight from many experts in health, sexuality and relationships, including sex therapists, OB-GYNs, a professional dominatrix and many more. In addition to these often clinical and informative statements, there are stories from real women of all genders, the book embracing trans and non-binary gender identities like a champ. Including practical tips on solo play, porn and more, and you get a cocktail that is hard to not down in one sip.

I highly recommend this book to anyone, both female, male, other and both. :)

[Aimee · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an excellent book on female sexuality. It is open, accepting, and empowering. While this book is nonfiction on a somewhat bawdy subject that is often treated a bit irreverently, the author manages to manage the subject with the appropriate amount of humor, facts, respect, and social relevance to intrigue, entertain, and teach the reader.

Some of the basics covered:

• Human anatomy
• Dispelling myths
• Birth control basics
• Basics of arousal and desire
• Loving your body

Some of the more complex topics:

• The brain and organism
• Solo play
• Safer Sex
• oral
• Toys
• Porn
• Positions and pointers

Psychological issues surrounding sex:

• Social issues surrounding females
• Overcoming past trauma
• Stress, depression, and Anxiety
• Gender identity and Sexual Orientation
• Faith and Sex
• Healthy relationships

The text is interspersed with “frisky facts”, appropriate illustrations, basic facts, games, journaling exercises, tables and charts to help illuminate points and entertain. I highly recommend this book.

Thanks so much to Netgalley, the publishers, and the author for providing me with a copy for an honest review.

[Rachel · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a book I would recommend to any person interested in learning more about sexuality-- their own and as an introduction to other sexualities. I would still consider it a surface level book as McLaughlin tries to tackle a very wide variety of subjects (while being aware that she is not into porn and is a straight white (and based on some comments she makes, Christian) woman).

Reservations:

The author's extraordinary privilege as an ex-model (she even refers to her "beautiful" privilege, which, I feel, is a way of isolating and creating a dichotomy of beautiful vs. non-beautiful that just shouldn't be brought into an all bodies/sexualities/identities woman-inclusive book) a white woman, a straight woman, and somebody who seems to have come from a conservative Christian home caused a few irritating moments (like when she refers to the volcanic eruption of Pompeii with the comment "[it preserved Pompeii's] every activity like a tragic, permanent mannequin challenge." Ew. I really don't know how to tell you how hard I cringed at that comment.

This also feels a bit like having Anastasia Grey (of Fifty Shades fame) teach you sex ed. Here are some examples:

Her personal thoughts in an anecdote:
"Ugh. No, no, no! AAAACK. Was I jealous!?! As if needy hadn't been enough!"
"Then it hit me-- OMG, he meant SEX!"
Or side-notes:
"(In other words, you don't have to wait until you've made like a meditative monk. Um, a sexually active monk?)"

There are also mentions of pussy-liciousness and a variety of other kind of immature plays-on-words in reference to vaginas that also made me cringe. It almost felt like talking to a teenager who was too nervous to speak confidently about themselves at points.

There was also a segment on predatory priests that she felt the need to include because it gave her a "light-bulb moment" that actually really grossed me out with the implications it caused and the further validation she gave it within the book:

(This is a gay priest speaking:) "'There are people who are predators, but their sexuality isn't about sex or pleasure, but domination,' he said. 'Then there are people-- priests, let's stick to that-- who have never really developed as sexual beings, and so their sexual awareness or identity is frozen like a pubescent or prepubescent, like when they entered seminary. They never dated, they never had any sex or intimacy through their early twenties, so then they find themselves in the real world and attracted to the same people that they were attracted to when they were kids, which are other kids.'
Holy a-ha moment-- for me, anyway. That doesn't justify sexual abuse, of course, but it definitely sheds light on roots of the epidemic. Imagine if sex and intimacy were normalized, not only for priests, but within all religions? What a different world this would be."

Mmmm, no. I'm going to pass on that being a good point. It creates a really disturbing implication that gay priests never look at the other men in their seminary (or any men in general) as they age and that leads to sexually assaulting children when they become priests. No. Just... no. The author confesses to having an internal bias (that she is aware of and she tries to confront) that she has worried that all men are doomed to be attracted to children. I feel like this passage was an unconscious realization of that bias. I'm not into it and I'm not into how she presents it as a "holy a-ha moment." Hard pass.

I think the forced casualness and constant OMGs, unnecessary question marks, and presentation of sex as if it is something her readers are just now discovering and coming from a shame-based background led to the feeling that shame and sex are tied together. It's probably just a personal preference, but I usually enjoy when a female author talks about sex matter-of-factly and doesn't give any reason to stir up feelings of shame. It's like when someone preemptively tries to reassure you and you sit with a feeling of discomfort as you think, "I didn't remotely need reassurance there, why did you think I did?"

Pros:

-She tries very hard to address the concept of internal biases!
-She has an alphabetic list defining queer terms/sexualities/gender identities!
-Emphasis on self-care!
-She's really good at promoting communication between partners!
-A HUGE variety of subjects! Including STIs, kinks, mindfulness, queer representation (people are only ever referred to as "owners of vulvas" not "females," expectations and myths pushed on women, healing from trauma (though I found it a little unnerving that she so heartily praised her mother's forgiveness towards her own father's sexual abuse as one of the most beautiful things she had encountered because, to me, that creates an expectation and when she tries to deny that expectation later on, it falls flat), and a LOT of testaments from a wide variety of women.

With that all being said, I'm going to buy a copy off of Amazon now to give to one of my good friends because I think she (as a straight white attractive female with a disconnect from her body) would hugely benefit from it. This is a good one for the repressed among us and can give a lot of useful or fun information to the more sexually-researched of us. I absolutely loved the self-care lists she dedicated a chapter to. But definitely there are some reservations.

[Amanda [Novel Addiction] · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was AWESOME. So well researched, and it was educational/academic while still being approachable. I especially loved her interviews with sex therapists of different religions to see how they see sexuality through the eyes of their religious views and values. Informative, entertaining, and highly recommended.

I'll also be checking out her companion workbook, and both are definitely going on my wish-list!

[Traci Thomas · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a great guide to sexual empowerment for those who identify as female. It covers a huge range of topics from sex toys to sex after abuse to self love. It’s very inclusive and thoughtful. The writer is solid though not life changing.

[Kait · Rating 5 out of 5]

My favorite thing about this book is it feels like I'm chatting with a girlfriend over drinks! August blends personal stories, expert interviews, and top notch research to blow open our ideas of what's sexually normal and reduce sexual shame in the process. This book made me laugh, cringe, cry, and, yes, get a girl boner. Whether you've read ALL the sex books or it's your first, Girl Boner is a must-have for anyone looking to grow in their self-love, their sexual prowess, and to have more intimate, exciting, and fulfilling sex.

I received an ARC of this book and reviewed it willingly. All opinions are my own.

[Sarah · Rating 5 out of 5]

I received a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review

What do you do when you're accused of only reading cruddy fiction books? Well first off you tell that person to mind their own business, and then you challenge yourself to read something outside your comfort zone, in this case a nonfiction book. I'm going to be cliche and say that this book completely took me by surprise, not the content itself, though it was wonderfully informative, but the writing is what really surprised me. I generally avoid nonfiction books because they take me a lot longer to slog through and I constantly feel like I'm not making any progress. While I still felt like that with this book, it is has been written in an informative but humorous style that makes it more of a journey than a painful slog. As for the book itself, I think its one of those books that is becoming increasingly important for any, and all, people to read as it helps identify things that people aren't aware of, or things that they think are strange or unique to them, and therefore feel ashamed to share with others, and yet this book just normalises it all, and that is something that we all need to start thinking about and appreciating.

[Jess Witkins · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a former community health educator who taught reproductive health in grade school through college classes, juvenile detention centers, and community events, I would LOVE to pass out August's book to everyone I came in contact with! It is incredibly well organized, easy to read, fun, educational and informative, and empowering. She accomplishes all of this with her affable and curious voice that you will recognize from her blog and podcast too.

As someone who worked in a reproductive health center for years, I know what an uphill climb it can feel like to get comprehensive, medically accurate information about sexual health into the hands of the public. Our country faces challenges in that we are very inconsistent with what we teach in our schools, and we still have a lot of work to do in terms of making sexuality, and female sexual empowerment in particular, a subject that is not taboo to talk about. August addresses these issues in her book and makes it ok to ask questions and start the dialogue. I particularly love that she's included journal questions at the ends of her chapters to help readers discern for themselves their own implicit biases or undiscovered desires.

Another aspect that must be highlighted is her research and inclusion of personal stories. She's got a great mix of scientific studies that lay groundwork, but she also includes personal stories from her own life and people she's interviewed so that human connection is in the book throughout. I could identify with August's background being raised as a "good girl" and she does an exceptional job of eliminating shame and making the reader feel connected and able to unpack any baggage they want, so they can get their girl boner on! Her language is inclusive in terms of LGBTQ identities and sexual orientation, which is crucial for anyone doing this kind of work.

In short, two thumbs up!! Whether you work in public health, are exploring your own relationships, or just need a safe space to get questions answered and know you're not alone, Girl Boner is a book I wish I'd had when I was younger, but am proud to own on my shelf today! Thank you to the author for her years of research, dialogue, and empowerment in this topic.

[Beverly Diehl · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5 stars. This book by the popular podcaster is mostly informational, with a small slice of autobiographical stories sprinkled in. The writing is chatty and fun, with chapters titled things like How to Slay at Solo Play (about masturbation) and The Big, Bodacious 'O.'

Disclaimer: I'm acquainted with the author via social media, and received a free copy of this work.

Girl Boner is a term the author uses for girls and women's sexual DESIRE - you know, that thing that too many people in Western culture tell us shouldn't exist. Of course, it exists - even if it looks and feels different from men's sexual desires. (And those of nonbinary people can be like girl boners or men boners or somewhere in between.) The stories the author shares, both about her own journey(s), and those of guest sexperts, are informative, poignant, and enlightening.

For the most part, the author tries not to "yuck anyone else's yum" and to be neutral about things that others choose to do with their genitals or relationships. However, there are some areas where it's not hard to discern how she feels (don't douche), where I agree with her, and others (tips for shaving the vulva) where I don't - naked pubes are a modern Western cultural preference driven by the influence of porn. Though to give her credit, she does mention the health risks of waxing and shaving, that pubic hair is NORMAL and nothing to be ashamed of.

All in all, it's an excellent reference book, whether for a young woman trying to sort out how she feels about her girl boner, or an experienced woman to learn better how to care for her precious body and desire. Highly recommended.

[Nicole Westen · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was super informative and factual. It was also incredibly inclusive in regards to identity and orientation. The one thing that made me a little sad is that while McLaughlin included so many interviews from so many different points of views, trans, homosexual, single, married, abuse survivors, sex workers, she didn't include anyone who wasn't neurotypical, hence 4 stars instead of 5. Women on the spectrum need a lot of factual information, which isn't always out there. Which is part of why I loved this book so much. Just information and examples, no shaming or blaming. But women/females on the spectrum face some unusual, and you could say unique, situations from a greater likelihood to have irregular periods which include PMDD and Dysmenorrhea to having sudden sensory overload. I just would have liked to have heard a female Autistic voice, or at least non-neurotypical voice in there as well. I hope it's something the author considers for later editions or other publications.

[Jo · Rating 4 out of 5]

#GirlBoner #NetGalley

This is not a scientific book but it can be used for educational purposes for 101 Sex Ed for young adults. August collects information about different subjects like anatomy, conceptual meaning, birth controls methods and more. Also, she added a personal flavor by adding her personal experiences. She did an amazing work!

[Leonard · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a rather unusual book, but certainly one worthwhile reading. The author, at a young age, wonders why the messages given boys and girls, men and women, about sex differ. It initiated a concern which she has had for some time. Her book is about helping girls and women become sexually empowered. The subtitle calls it the "good girl's guide," but boys and men should read it too. I didn't read all of it. I read the first 8 chapters, then skipped 9-12 and started reading again at chapter 13 which is entitled, "Oh My Goddess! Sex, Empowerment, and Religion." Other catching chapter titles are "Girl Boner Anatomy," The Big, Bodacious 'O'" and "Porn Perks, Problems, and the Penises in Between." I've always felt that porn was degrading to women but this author writes about "ethical" porn and "feminist" porn in a positive manner. So check this one out and see what you think. It's bound to keep your attention.

[Heidi Mastrogiovanni · Rating 5 out of 5]

Where was this fabulous book when I was in my 20s or 30s or 40s or 50s? Rhetorical question... I'm just VERY glad and grateful that it's here now! And women of a certain age, as I am, will know that I am bestowing the highest praise I can think of when I say that this fabulous book is the "Our Bodies, Ourselves" for the new millennium and beyond. August McLaughlin has created a wonderful gift for all of us. She has covered every topic and more... She has given women so many joyous thoughts on how to empower their sexuality and, indeed, their joy, forever and always. I was especially struck by how generously and richly McLaughlin shares her own experiences with her readers. She is truly a loving and caring and hilarious and delightful and inspiring best friend to all of us.

[MaryEllen · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you've ever had a "am I normal? Is it just my body?" when it comes to wellness down below the belt, then this is the book for you. I think there are a few really important things about this book:

1. The statistics are mindblowing when it comes to sexual wellness and sexual education.
2. She not only talks the talk, but she also walks the walk. She has a lot of statistics to back up everything she is writing about, but she's also been personally involved in a few too. She has a few chapters about her own involvement in sexual clinical research studies which was cool to read.
3. This is not just for girls. Guys can learn so much from this book too. This is like a guidebook to how to learn about your body, how to open your mind to wellness and be well versed in the world of sexual empowerment.
4. It has really fun interactive puzzles, questions, and thought prompts to keep you going.

Reading this book is like having a really cool conversation with one of your girl friends. You're sitting there and chatting away, but you're learning new things every single chapter about yourself and your body.

[BCR 88 · Rating 5 out of 5]

Girl Boner by August McLaughlin is a valuable resource because it speaks to the heart and mind. Sexual empowerment is a subject with no shortage of annotation and commentary, but this work is communicative on this matter because her voice is genuine, her quoted contributors are respected, and the book is well researched. McLaughlin's narrative makes us aware of important aspects of sexual empowerment. Yet, Girl Boner is an easy read. I would recommend anyone interested in this subject area, including men, read the book and use McLaughlin's insight as a pathway to discussing sexual well-being with their loved ones.

[Soubhi · Rating 5 out of 5]

I received a free copy from LibraryThing and the publisher for the Early Reviewer’s Program.

This book is fun to read, which isn’t a thing I often feel about non fiction. I love the way the author started each chapter with a true story to help the reader relate to the content, and the journal questions offered at the end of each chapter as well.

Girl Boner touches on sensitive subjects (pun intended) such as anatomy, discrimination, abuse, as well as empowering one’s such as how your body might work and how you might think about sex, toys, positions, and relationships.

I like that there are multiple ways the book could be used: as reference for a specific chapter, read cover to cover, as text for sex Ed, or for personal growth through journaling or therapy.

Recommended for everyone!

[Robin Morgan · Rating 5 out of 5]

I received a hardcover edition of this book from the author’s publisher through a giveaway they had on LibraryThing, and the following is my honest opinion.

Now Ladies, what’s the first thing that pops into your mind when you hear the word “boner?” Isn’t it the erection of a man’s normally limp penis? Erection is the involuntary indication that a guy has become totally aroused sexually and ready to insert his boner into woman’s clit [clitoris] for even more sexual gratification. Perhaps that’s why you’ve got to love the author’s decision to use that word as part of her attention-getting, curiosity arousal making title for her book, “Girl Boner.”

The fact is, that even the woman who’s the biggest prude around can’t understand why she can be sexually aroused by the mere touching of their own genitals. And the sad reason for this is that far, far too many women are extremely naïve about this subject matter, which is probably due to the utter lack of sexual education they’ve gotten, thus making them easily shocked by anything that’s possibly relating to sex or nudity even in the slightest manner.

While on one hand, this is an unbelievable contraindication, especially when you consider that society’s enfranchisement of a woman’s body has been used to market practically everything under the sun. The other hand society is decreeing in what manner the so-called “good girl” should appear, behave and most importantly think.

All women have to appreciate the effort that the author, August McLaughlin, has put into compiling this exquisite guide which opens the door to their own sexual liberation; which is primarily due to the unadulterated descriptions that she offers of her own personal experiences. The book covers a vast myriad of female issues from the simplistic ones which concerns relationships to the more explicit ones which deals the various kinds of orgasms they’re liking to experience.

It’s time for all women rid themselves of society’s shame-making attitude when it comes to their own sexuality and sexuality in general so they can get pleasure from any sexual activity they’d like to experience. While this book is simply sublime for all young girls who are beginning their journeys into womanhood, this book is also great for women of any age so they can still learn what they still don’t know about sexuality, and possibly consider experiencing what they’ve been missing all these years. And for doing this for all of her readers, how can I not give Ms. McLaughlin the 5 STARS she so richly deserves.

BRAVO Ms. August McLaughlin. BRAVO

BTW – This reviewer is 67 years old.

[Ylva · Rating 2 out of 5]

I can find no other word to describe this book except for weird. Not because it was very feminist and what is called progressive, because I know about these theories. But the author seems to be obsessed with masturbation and sex. Masturbation was presented as a magical cure that (alongside therapy) helps with anxiety and other mental problems and also seems to be necessary for a healthy sex life. Almost every chapter contained a remark about how wonderful masturbation helps with the topic of the chapter. She also mentions intercourse positions that are supposed to help with anxiety (I wonder how that is supposed to work). The author also supports prostitution as well as recommends watching (feminist, ethical - though I wonder if porn can ever be ethical) porn and reading erotica multiple times and doesn't adress the fact that some women (and "women with penises", this is supposed to be an inclusive book) might not be interested in masturbation, porn and erotica.

The weirdest chapter was the one about religion. Throughout the book, she already mentioned that "spiritual things" can help with various problems, but then again, she states that you should not let any religion limit your sexuality (why then turn to religion to get help with your sexuality if you don't want to follow its rules?).

There is also a big mistake in the chapter about contraception, where she says that natural family planning is another word for the rythm method, which is completely wrong, and she states a Pearl Index of 24 for all natural methods, which is also wrong. The symptothermal method by Weschler has a Pearl Index of 2 and is as safe as the birth control pill, while the rythm method is not safe and that is the natural method with a Pearl Index of 24. She also gives no reference to where she got the information that the rythm method and NFP/FAM are the same. This is something that she should definitely know as a sex educator!

This book is basically the adult version of Girl (https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/3...). Not recommended.

Disclaimer: I received a free copy via Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.

[Tibby]

This was a great introduction to sex and sexuality. I really appreciated the variety of topics McLaughlin tackles, from birth control to STIs to sex toys. It was especially refreshing how she encourages women to embrace their sexuality and break free from shame around it. Her writing style is very conversational and breezy which made the topics way less intimidating and the book easily digestible.

I so appreciated her discussions around how sex education short changes people with vulvas. Sex ed usually discusses sex and masturbation and arousal for people with penises, but then jumps to menstruation for people with vulvas as if that is the analog in our bodies (it is 1000% *not* the analog). The book then picks up from where sex ed leaves off and dives deeply into shame and societal messaging as well as straight facts. It's a great mix of challenging entrenched ideas and presenting information.

That being said, none of the information was new or ground breaking *for me*. I ended up skimming a number of sections (birth control for example). What I am excited about is keeping this on my book shelves for my daughters. This is a book I would hand young teens of ALL genders after they've had the basics of sex, sexuality, and biology. (She doesn't delve into what menstruation is, so young people will need some basics before encountering her slightly more advanced topics.)

[Tiegan · Rating 4 out of 5]

There was a lot of good material in this book. However, I did start to feel lost through chapters 11-14. While August did say that not all sections would apply to every person, these chapters felt a bit lecture-y to me and less about helping anyone who identifies with femininity to feel empowered. These chapters came across kind of text-book, to me, and felt more like readers are getting more definitions on shame, gender identity, shame (again, but more on the religion aspect, I guess?), and then some information on porn. I did not feel as though there was much empowerment information in these chapters and there could have been. Outside of those chapters, I think this book did a good job of going through various topics and how to use those topics in your own life and comfort-zones to become empowered.

[Elizabeth · Rating 2 out of 5]

Girl Boner: The Good Girl's Guide to Sexual Empowerment (Hardcover)
by August McLaughlin




Contents: Foreword / by Megan Fleming, PhD -- Introduction -- The orgasm that changed my life -- What about girl boners? -- Girl boner anatomy -- Arousal and desire -- The big, bodacious 'O' -- How to slay at solo play -- All about oral sex -- Loving your body, for real -- Stress, anxiety, and depression, oh my -- Birth control basics -- Safer sex and STIs -- Gender identity and sexual orientation -- Oh my goddess! Sex, empowerment and religion -- Porn perks, problems, and the penises in between -- Healing from trauma or abuse -- Healthy relationships -- Sex toys 101 -- Whips, chains, and BDSM -- Empowering sex positions -- Arousing your life.


see also
https://www.shape.com/lifestyle/sex-a...

[Bekki Fahrer · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was way better than I anticipated. It is a kind and thoughtful book. Not only is the author open about her personal trauma, she also make space for people to identify where they are and what they need. This book has journal questions, ideas to ponder, helps the reader have tools to handle many issues that they may face. This is not a shaming book, rather a tool for helping women own their needs, wants, and pleasure. It is nuanced and has practical hints for dealing with trauma, navigating through body issues and shame, and affirms people where they are at. I was expecting it to be scathing towards people who choose abstinence and monogamy, but the book didn't at all. In fact, it even included tips towards making those choices be as healthy and empowered as they can be.

[Sherman Bastarache · Rating 5 out of 5]

Being male, I have read several books on female sexuality. August Mclaughlin has really nailed every topic in complete overall content. She writes in a friendly, understandable manner that most books lack. The writing, thus reading, was smooth, concise, and importantly, non-judgemental. This work is need for females to understand their own sexual issues. It is even more needed for males to understand female sexual issues. Every man interested in the sexual health and happiness of his female counterpart should read this. Any persons from, or supporting LGBT—fellow humans, with human love and human rights—should read this book. If you’re just looking for fun knowledge to enhance your relationship, look no further than Girl Boner!

Five Stars!

Sherman Bastarache

[Petra Wiesmayer · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a “good girl” who grew up in a very Catholic environment, went to Catholic school without any sex education, and where nobody ever even dared to speak the word sex, this book is something I wish had existed when I was a teenager … or in my twenties or even thirties. August McLaughlin manages wonderfully to take the shame out of sexuality and “tell it like it is”. She does not shy away from touching areas – yes I mean that in every sense of the words – that you usually don’t talk about. I especially loved the way she includes personal stories. They make you feel as if you are talking to a good friend. I can highly recommend “Girl Boner: The Good Girl's Guide to Sexual Empowerment” to girls of all ages, from grandmother to granddaughter and every age in between.

[Amy Noe · Rating 5 out of 5]

I thought this was a really comprehensive and thought provoking book on sexual empowerment that I wish I had had access to 10-15 years ago. It covered such a huge array of topics around sex, loving yourself, mental health, spirituality, body positivity, and more. While I didn't agree with every single thing the author had to say, I feel so much more knowledgeable and open about certain topics than I did before reading. I highly recommend for all women to read, but would be particularly useful to younger women.

[Bella · Rating 3 out of 5]

I applaud such a book with a deliciously salacious title/concept. I have learnt a couple of techniques and enjoyed the book overall. Having said that, I skipped a few sections, not for any other reason than a mere lack of interest in the topics, and it doesn’t speak to the topics’ lack of appeal. I don’t find that the style in which the book is written encourages me to explore those chapters in spite of a flagged interest in them.

[Sneha Nair · Rating 5 out of 5]

McLaughlin, writes as if she discovered sex, and she really wants to share the news. Her book is terrifically encouraging, if not exactly filled with surprises. Masturbation, good! Fat-shaming, bad! “Embracing our sexuality and capacity for pleasure can be as crucial to living a full, healthy life as eating a balanced diet, breathing well and getting sufficient nightly sleep.” True words, those.

[Katrina · Rating 1 out of 5]

I know, I'm in the minority of readers who didn't enjoy this book. I really wanted to join and admire McLaughlin's work, but I couldn't. Now I did find some passages funny and painfully honest, which was refreshing, but I couldn't relate to it. Ultimately it boils down to what you are looking for when it comes to women discussing human sexuality.

[Harley · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a journey I went on with this book. August McLaughlin covers sexual empowerment through a wide array of lenses, including religious upbringing, pregnancy, disability, sex work, being transgender, and so on. Completing the journal exercises in it helped immensely with working through my own ingrained beliefs, too.