What do I do when a teenager comes out to me? How do I respond in a way that’s helpful rather than creating additional problems?
4 Views on Pastoring LGBTQ Teenagers is a frank and compassionate conversation with four in-the-trenches youth workers who have wrestled with these questions and strengthened their ministries as a result. In fact, it’s out of real-life experience with gay, bi, cisgender, trans, queer, or questioning teens in their own youth groups that these youth workers are able to offer up their approaches—approaches which are then not theoretical at all, but practical and born of relational, everyday ministry.
Will you find all the answers in this book? No. Look elsewhere for theological debate; look elsewhere for pat, one-size-fits-all methodologies. Youth ministry is often messy and complex, but it’s a divine calling to connect every youth with straight, gay, bi, cisgender, trans, queer, or questioning.
The Youth Cartel‘s recent release, "4 Views on Pastoring LGBTQ Teenagers," is critical reading for anyone connected to youth ministry. I’ll be honest; I wasn’t entirely sure what to expect. When they first announced it as an upcoming book, I assumed it would be like most contrasting views books; a debate on whether or not youth ministry should minister to LGBTQ teens. I was wrong; this book assumes that as people created in the image of God, every church has a divine calling to minister to LGBTQ teens. This book is not a theological debate, rather, it is a presentation of a range of approaches to practical ministry with young people.
Given that premise, I had another assumption. Noticing a pattern? I assumed it would be four liberal/progressive authors presenting their approaches with little to no connection to the culture and context of my church. I was so wrong. Mark Oestreicher did an incredible job of assembling a group of authors from significantly different church contexts, each with drive to minister to LGBTQ teens, but in very different ways, shaped dramatically by their church cultures.
A central theme to the book is this; “if we say we are all made in the image of God – the Imago Dei – then we must affirm that LGBTQ individuals are also made in the image of God” (p.17). Each of the authors are united in the calling to minister to all young people, regardless of labels; what was fascinating to see them each present their approaches, as well as push back on one another in areas of disagreement. One author comes from a point of view of full inclusion and equality, another writes, “even though we may not agree with their sexual behaviors or what many in the church would call lifestyle choices, we can still offer love and extend grace” (p.76). What would seem such conflicting theologies, and did result in some thought provoking rebuttals in their responses to one another, was still incredibly exciting to see because each of these ministries were being proactive and intentional in their love and ministry to a community typically rejected or ignored by the church at large.
The format was simple; each author (Shelley Donaldson, Gemma Dunning, Nick Elio, Eric Woods) presented a personal story that shaped and challenged them, followed by their theology and ministry framework, and concluded with a description of how they applied that practically in their ministries. Each of the four views are followed by one response from one of the other authors, highlighting areas of agreement, concern, and even outright disagreement. The book concludes with two appendixes on ministry to transgender teens (Mark Oestricher, Audrua Welch Malvaez); the first from the parent of a transgender teen, the second from the perspective of pastoring transgender teens. For me, perhaps one of the most convicting and powerful quotes came from Oestricher in his appendix, “Thoughts from a Parent of a Transgender Teen.” He was answering the question of what he needed as a parent, and it was simple; “to know that you still want my kid here, even if they don’t fit your idea of the ideal youth ministry kid. I want you to celebrate all that is good and beautiful and true about my child and my relationship with my child” (p.122).
So, to sum up; this book is a must read. It’s not huge; at just under 140 pages, it is not overwhelming. For me, as a youth pastor, I felt like it was the first time I was reading something that gave actual direction on possible approaches to ministry instead of just theological arguments. It’s a risky book to write in our American church climate; I wonder if there aren’t more resources out there like this one because of fear? I may have drained the ink in my highlighter as I was reading; there is something marked on just about every page of my copy. It’s well written, from significantly different ministry theological and practical climates, and it is a significant contribution to the youth ministry world.
The book forced me to think a lot evaluate, which is probably really helpful around this topic. Because it is 4 different writers, some of it flowed better than other parts, but it was mostly well written. It doesn't really drive into the theology of these issues all that much. It mostly focuses on what you do after you have done the theological studying I think, and that plays out a little awkwardly at times, but it's not that much of a problem if you can make the inferences yourself. All around, would recommend to at least start more thought and conversations to those in youth ministry.
I really appreciate this book. It offers different perspectives and great advice from wise youth pastors. Each author cares deeply about LBGT teens and wants to shepherd and love them. It’s a great resource for youth workers!
If you are a youth worker or someone who loves teens and wonder how to pastor teens in the LGBTQ community this book will not solve your problems. It will not give you all the answers or offer a cookie cutter solution. This is not an answer book, it is a question book. It is a suggestion book, it is a discussion book and the editor Mark Oestreicher and the contributing authors invite you to join the discussion. It is set up as most "Four Views" books. Someone shares an opinion and someone responds. Unlike other books in this genre these authors are not offering four radically different options. These issues are too messy to offer clean alternative models. Instead four youth workers from different churches and ministries tell their stories. They differ in church size, philosophy and theology. There is no way to agree with everyone and you may find yourself reacting strongly. You will certainly be challenged. The only thing that everyone agrees with is compassion. The pressure, confusion and rejection that most LGBTQ student feel is scary. Whatever we feel about the issues we need to love these kids and remind them that God loves them even more.
This is a must read for everyone who works with teenagers in the church no matter what you believe about the LGBTQ conversation in the church. This is not a book debating homosexuality but a book about caring for and loving ALL students as they deserved to be loved in our ministries. This collaborative book is written by four different people who work in youth ministry and their different views on how to pastor LGBTQ teens. Each writer also offers a response to one of the other views in the book; what they agreed with in the view they are responding to and what they disagreed with. This book mostly talks about sexual orientation but in the appendix are two helpful articles on gender identity. While I did not agree with every view and every response written in this book, I believe it is important to be willing to listen to all perspectives and this book was a great opportunity to do just that.
I went into this book with high hopes, and there was one chapter that was super helpful and had great perspectives. I know the point wasn't to debate the theology behind the authors' views, and I know they all came to similar conclusions, but I just don't believe that a pastor can show love and respect to a person in the LGBTQ community if they maintain the belief that it's a sin. Goals are important, and if your goal is to love a person until they "change their ways" or "realize their sin", then I don't think you can really call that love.
I find the approach of providing four different views on this subject to be unique and helpful. I have my own view, but was able to learn a little something from all four. This book is highly practical and a great conversation starter. The appendices about transgender youth are also particularly helpful.
An insightful and thought-provoking book, providing a variety of perspectives & responses on welcoming and assimilating LGBTQ youth into church ministry, by creating a safe and loving place as a youth leader.
Helpful, interesting and thought provoking but doesn't consider all approaches. For example Ed Shaw's Plausibility problem.
Helpful to gain some perspective on the issue but I don't think any of these give a fully biblical perspective. There really are actually only two views presented here.
It’s clear the care and devotion that each of these authors have for this topic, however I think scripture is repeatedly taken out of context or just completely compromised which is a dangerous place to be.
The rating of this book is not because the content is low quality or that I disagree with a lot of the content written. In fact I found that I aligned with more of the book than I thought I would initially. My low rating of the book is because I believe that the book has a low “objective” in it’s reasoning for being written. The various authors clearly state their intent in writing this book is to simply make you think about a subject you would rather pass over... and to slightly change your perspective by just a few degrees. I love this humble, modest approach to authorship. No doubt had they came right out and said, “YOU MUST CHANGE” in the first few pages I would have probably put the book down. But I feel that taking the time to read 115 pages of a book should return more of an investment than just a slight perspective change. None the less the book accomplished just that for me... there were no real theological shifts in my study after reading this book. I am not radically motivated to go out and be an activist for the LGBTQ movement. But I am armed with more facts, knowledge, stories, perspectives, and resources to love & serve the people God has in front of me... LGBTQ or not. This is a great, quick read that I would recommend to any pastor, parent, teacher who works with teenagers and wants to love all of them better no matter their sin condition.