Defiant Joy: Taking Hold of Hope, Beauty, and Life in a Hurting World

by Stasi Eldredge

We all spend a lot of energy reaching for happiness, but we're never quite able to hang on to it. Real life happens, and our circumstances take us on an emotional rollercoaster. Oftentimes, the Bible's call to "be joyful always" seems out of reach--but it doesn't have to be. We are called to live. And, miraculously, to live with joy. Join bestselling author Stasi Eldredge as she shows us how to choose a joy that stands against the tides of life's real and often overwhelming pain. Defiant Joy reminds us that a joy that is defiant in the face of this broken world was meant to be ours. This joy isn't simply happiness on steroids, it's the unyielding belief that sorrow and loss do not have the final say. It's the stubborn determination to be present in whatever may come and interpret both goodness and grief by the light of heaven. Defiant Joy will give you the encouragement you need In Defiant Joy , Stasi invites us with courage, candor, and tender vulnerability to a place beyond sadness or happiness, leading the way as we learn how to maintain a posture of holy defiance that neither denies nor diminishes our pain but dares to live with expectant, unwavering hope.

Genres: Christian, Nonfiction, Faith, Christian Living, Christian Non Fiction, Audiobook, Inspirational

256 pages, Paperback

Published October 16, 2018

About the author

Stasi Eldredge loves writing and speaking to women about the goodness of God. She spent her childhood years in Prairie Village, Kansas, for which she is truly grateful. Her family moved to southern California back in the really bad smog days when she was ten. She loved theater and acting and took a partiality to her now-husband, John, when they were friends in high school. Stasi earned her bachelor's degree in Sociology from San Diego State University, which she attended primarily because it was close to the beach. She became a Christian her junior year in college and dove into the ministry of Campus Crusade for Christ. After graduating, Stasi joined Youth for Christ, heading up a ministry to pregnant teenagers and teen mothers. She has been active in ministry ever since, including theater ministry, crisis pregnancy center ministry, women’s ministry, and children’s ministry. The Eldredge family moved to Colorado in 1991.

Stasi loves the joy and freedom that comes from knowing the passionate, stunning love of Jesus Christ and lives to see others come to know him more deeply. She loves worship music, time to bake, celebrating life, getting lost in a good novel, baths, walking in the woods, hearing her sons' laughter, the sound of wind in the trees, a good cup of coffee, the smell of the earth after it rains, a powerful turn of phrase, animals in the wild, gardens, freshly mowed grass, family traditions, cherished friendships, the Tetons, rivers, mountain lakes, the grace and beauty of horses, the affection of her dog, and most of all, her family and her God.

Reviews

[LoL · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was lucky enough to win this book through a giveaway. I have recently been going through a personal tragedy and I needed something to read to hopefully distract me & change my bleak outlook on events. I have to say that it helped me cope immensely, that you aren't alone and that no matter how much evil is out there in the world there's also goodness; you just have to make the effort to look for it. I wanted to thank you as I've been struggling to make sense of the cruelty in this world... and I know this sounds corny: I took it as a sign to keep pushing forward and that there really is hope.

[Sarah · Rating 3 out of 5]

Defiant Joy by Stasi Eldredge is supposed to be all about “taking hold of hope, beauty, and life in a hurting world.” Essentially, the book wants us to remember that even though we live in a fallen world that’s filled with hurts and tears, we can still have joy because of Christ. That’s why the joy needs to be defiant; the world’s fallenness screams for us to hold onto the hurts and stew in bitterness, but in Christ, we can defy all odds and still have joy.

Although I loved the concept of the book, it felt like it didn’t quite deliver on the message it was promising. There were good nuggets of truth including Stasi’s own honest struggles with weight issues and depression as well as the retelling of her daughter-in-law’s painful miscarriage.

Overall even though I enjoyed Stasi’s vulnerable stories peppered throughout the book, I didn’t feel like there were a significant amount of practical takeaways, which is what I was looking for. I wanted to know how I can have joy in my trials and what that would look like on a day-to-day basis.

There was also a concerning part of the book that had this to say:

“Do you want to know what goes on in the heart of the Trinity? I will tell you. In the heart of the Trinity, the Father laughs and gives birth to the Son. The Son laughs back and gives birth to the Spirit. The whole Trinity laughs and gives birth to us.”

Now, this sounds beautiful on the surface. I understand that Stasi is attempting to illustrate the love relationship of the Trinity which is a truly deep and enriching topic. But the Father did not give birth to the Son and the Son did not give birth to the Spirit. Saying so is a heresy, BUT, I am not calling Stasi a heretic. I think there should be a spirit of grace extended to the body of Christ with tricky theological matters (like the Trinity) especially when someone is not a theologian. Though I do hold someone to a higher standard if they are a theologian.

With all this said, there are some great personal stories, but I felt like Defiant Joy didn’t deliver on its main message. I give it 3 1/2 stars.

***I received this book for free from BookLook in exchange for an honest review.

[Amanda (BookLoverAmanda) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Defiant Joy by Stasi Eldredge
4 Stars
Blog post: https://bookloveramanda.blogspot.com/...

This was a very relatable book for me. Several moments relatable as a special needs mama and someone who needed to be reminded all about the joyous moments we miss. This book is a good one for perspective - that joy isn't about circumstances by where we place out trust, in Christ, who offers unshakeable hope.

What I like most about this is how practical it is - she doesn't just tell us to choose joy and leave it at that, she provides real, tangible ways to cultivate joy through gratitude, worship, community and faith. Her insights are relatable and deeply encouraging, specifically for those who are walking or have walked through challenging seasons of life.

If you are feeling weighed down by life's struggles or looking for a faith filled perspective on joy, check this out. It will leave you feeling uplifted.

Thanks Krista at Books and Jams for hosting a readalong for this one!

[Karen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolutely amazing book. I started reading and didn't stop. It was so vulnerable and beautiful and instructional. If you want to find joy in the midst of this messy thing called life, read this book. She is real with her struggles and her having to choose to be joyful in defiance of her circumstances.....not just once and then done, but over and over and over again.....She offers hope that it can be done, that you really can take hold of hope, beauty and life in a hurting world.

[Amanda · Rating 4 out of 5]

On October 10, 2018, I was diagnosed with an aggressive form of breast cancer. Right after my diagnosis, I saw this book available for review and really felt as though I needed to read it. My life has been completely turned upside down since the day of my diagnosis…it’s been full of appointments, ER visits, biopsies, ultrasounds, CT scans, MRIs, PET scans, chemotherapy, wig shopping, hair loss, nausea, pain, tears, frustration, uncertainty, and JOY?

This book shares how we can live with joy in spite of our circumstances. Stasi shares the things that are thieves of joy, things that steal it away. She also shares how we can cultivate our joy. There are some things in this book that I felt were written specifically for me. I have seen God’s sovereignty in placing this book in my hands “for such a time as this”. If I had read it in a season of plenty, a season where everything was going swimmingly, I probably wouldn’t have found as much in it to apply to my life. But reading it while facing a very scary, life threatening disease caused me to savor each word.

I have found through this trial that having defiant joy is possible and this book has helped with that. Knowing that God is with me through everything and I’ll be okay no matter what has changed the way I look at my circumstances.

I highly recommend this book to everyone…if you are not in a storm you have either come out of one or you’re heading into one so it is good to have on hand. It was a quick, easy read but full of great information.

My Rating
3.5 stars

I received this book from the publisher to review. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

[Josie Jones (Lutz) · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was a bit slow at points and a bit "basic" in it's encouragement at points, it took me much longer than I'd like to admit to finish. However, overall I still really loved it. When walking through struggle, hardship or grief, I think that some of the truths and encouragements highlighted in this book were so helpful. I identified heavily with some of the heartache she touched on here and I think she does well at addressing how important it is to mourn and lament in that, but to also be open to an d push yourself to joy as well. So good!

[Linda Martin · Rating 4 out of 5]

Christian inspiration for women.

I listened to the audiobook version of this book, narrated by the author herself. She has a very pleasant voice, so that was a plus!

This was nice to listen to as I went about my activities, to a point. It required a bit of focus to remain connected to the flow of her thoughts. It would be good to listen to while exercising or doing artwork or crochet, for example. Maybe not so much if an activity involves filing or reading, or anything else that might distract attention from what she's saying.

This is the kind of book that uplifts and gives hope, yet at times it delved into some very sad situations she was faced with. Through it all she connected with the joy given by God to those who love him.

[Honeybee · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a wonderful book for those who need some encouragement! The subtitle of Defiant Joy: Taking Hold of Hope, Beauty, and Life in a Hurting World gives a good idea of what it is about. The author, Stasi Eldredge, who also wrote Captivated, talks about how putting our focus on God--the source of the hope, beauty and life we all crave--can bring joy to our hearts, even in a world that is constantly out to steal it.

I so appreciate the author's transparency. People often think that those in ministry should have it all together. They shouldn't have issues with their eating habits or body image, struggle with depression and loneliness, or any of a myriad of other problems. Stasi is taking a big risk disclosing that she faces the same pain, distractions and other joy-thieves that we do. The result, however, is that she gives us "ordinary folks" hope that we can overcome and find joy in the midst of our trials, as well.

There are a lot of great scriptures aptly expounded and applied in this book. The author shares plenty of practical ideas on how to recover and maintain the joie de vivre that keeps us going. This is not a self-help book, per se. On the contrary, Eldredge is pointing us to God, rather than ourselves. The idea is that, when we get His perspective on ourselves, our pain and our circumstances, joy finds its way into our hearts.

I recommend this book to all sorts of Christians. I enjoyed reading it as a daily devotional, and then shared highlights with my friends on Facebook to encourage them and help me remember. Although it doesn't have discussion questions, a good facilitator would find Defiant Joy a useful text for a small group Bible study or book-of-the-month club. In the back, the author includes some daily prayers, if you are into that sort of thing. If joy is lacking in your life, or you'd like a bit more, this is a great place to start. Buy one for your personal library, and another to give away.

[Katie Pace · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was given the opportunity to read an advanced copy of “Defiant Joy, and having read her previous titles, I was eager to see what would come from this title. In her other books, Stasi leads women in discovering their God-given identities- seeing themselves as the treasures He paid such a extravagant price to obtain. I have laughed with her, found life in the midst of cultural messages of what I should be as a woman. But here, on this journey, the reader is given the opportunity to mourn people, places and events; to take time to recognize the places we were just getting by, faking happiness while covering up the aching places of our hearts. On this journey with our guide, who leads from her own experience on this trail, we are not told to dust ourselves off and move on: rather that the path to true hope and authentic, defiant joy calls us to own our pain, and choose joy in spite of it. The only way to joy, is to embrace the places of loss, disappointment, and grief; that we cannot go over, under, or around: the Life we seek is only obtained through acknowledging, yes there is pain this night, but we can have joy, because dawn is breaking. Defiant Joy is for those of us, who do not recognize we have been coasting this whole time, biding our time each day until it is time to begin again. This book was a breath of fresh air, when I did not know I had been holding my breath. Over and over, I felt as if the author's words lifted my chin and encouraged me to look upward. Defiant Joy calls us to reflect- to acknowledge the pain fully, not run from it, but points to our Merciful High Priest, who knows our griefs intimately and acutely. He is the Source of the hope and joy we desperately need to survive this life.

[Allison Anderson Armstrong · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a great, helpful book. She is so relatable and has had or is going through many hard experiences, but her message rings strong and clear. Christ is the answer! I've had many similar thoughts that she has recorded in her book, and while sometimes the greatest truths are the simplest ones, it's not just your typical book with an "easy recipe to find joy" or "5 simple steps to becoming a happier person" or other oversimplified nonsense. It is biblical, grounded, real, touching, and uplifting and I will read again soon.

[Emma Tourtelotte · Rating 3 out of 5]

have you ever started reading a book and you immediately know that this type of encouraging message is just not super relatable to where you’re at?? ya me too with this one. sweet lady & sweet message but not the right time
3.2/5

[Susan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Just the title 'Defiant Joy' and the photo of a sparkler lighting up a gloomy background captured my interest. Defiance and Joy seemed to me an oxymoron; I wondered how they could possibly be grouped together. The idea of defiant joy had to spell out a strong individual, someone who could choose to be joyful despite bleak circumstances. The message of the book and Stasi's authentic honesty and skill in the telling including personal stories propelled me along through each page. From defining 'defiant' as demonstrating strength and courage even in tragedy to clearly describing the difference between happiness and joy, I began to personalize the book's message, recalling moments in my own life, past or present where I too need a great dose of defiant joy. Stasi writes from the background of a deep faith in God, the source of the true joy she's found in her life. I've always cherished the idea of 'dancing in the rain', of choosing to find joy in the darkest circumstance, but it doesn't come naturally. It isn't easy. I feel 'Defiant Joy' has gently reminded and equipped me with tools to do just that, to dance in the rain with the Joy Jesus gives me. Today I had the opportunity to put these tools into practice in a small way. Our power has been off for a couple days, my phones don't work, and my fridge and freezer food are melting. I can't accomplish my work or communicate with my family. But I chose joy. I chose to start the day thankful for all the blessings I do have - and there were so many! I was surprised and blessed to receive an advanced reader's copy. Thank you, Stasi, for encouraging me to live with defiant joy! May thousands more readers be inspired as well!

[Liza Tabita · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love this book, I think we, as women, tend to worry a lot and we can lose our joy very quickly, we tend to let our emotions in the drivers seat and just go with it. Even if I knew that joy is one of the fruits of the Spirit, I never realized that joy doesn’t have to depend on how I feel. I can have joy regardless of how I feel or my circumstances, and that is a big thing for us as women of God. We have to let go of our feelings and connect our heart to God, so we could have everlasting joy, hope, love, not short term emotions.
I love the book, It gave me a different perspective over my feelings and the fruit of the Spirit

[Mesilla · Rating 5 out of 5]

I had to read this book slowly so I could digest it all and let it soak in. Stasi is open and honest with her struggles and the hurts of life. She encourages us to make a choice during those times. To choose joy, gratefulness and hope even when it feels impossible. To choose to fix our eyes on Jesus. To see the beautiful things around us. If your finding yourself going thru a dark time, her message will bring some Light and encouragement to your soul.

[Angela Ebert · Rating 4 out of 5]

Defiant joy is a joy that is borne of letting our roots go down deep into the love and care of God in the midst of the uncomfortable realities and challenges of our real lives. I think we all as believers want to experience this kind of joy — an unwavering or steadfast joy — but it is dearly bought and therefore daunting to walk in.

I appreciated the author’s use of her own and others’ experiences of, at times, walking the path of defiant joy. In this book there is inspiration to choose this path without subtle messages of shame when one chooses less... inspiring while also acknowledging our humanity.

There is a passage I particularly have gone back to multiple times as I consider the sometimes difficult but essential way of defiant joy. It’s a little long, but I’ll share here:

(p. 153)
Life will inevitably be hard, and as maturing believers with our eyes set on Jesus, we will constantly be presented with opportunities to make choices that will either lead to a deeper joy or not. Here is what I mean:
-It’s hard to stand up against the group when they’re going the wrong direction — spiritually or any other way. But it’s also hard on our consciences afterward if we don’t.
-It’s hard to be kind to the mean, curmudgeonly neighbor. It’s hard as well to be convicted of being unloving.
-It’s hard to not spend the money on the item we desire. It’s hard to save money. It’s also hard to be in debt.
-It’s hard to have a loving but tough confrontational conversation with a friend. It’s also hard to not have one and then have an offense and distance creep into that friendship.
-It’s hard to fight for a marriage. It’s hard to lose a marriage
-It’s hard to break an addiction. And it’s hard to be captive to one.
-It’s hard to live under the cloak of depression. It’s also hard to step toward healing.
-It’s hard to face the story of your life. And it’s hard to live in denial.
-It’s hard to reject the pressure for other peoples demands. It’s hard as well to live under them.
-It’s hard to set aside time every single day to press in to the heart of God. Sometimes it’s even hard to pray. It’s hard to find the time. But it’s harder to live your day with strength, hope, and integrity if you don’t.
-It’s hard to pursue Living Water. And it’s hard to live in a dry and thirsty land without it…

We get to choose our hard, and the decision we make will either lead to cultivating our hearts with a hope-filled joy or deadening them with weariness and despair. Every morning, when I wake up, I can guess that there are going to be hard things in the day. But the hard I choose is to follow Christ wherever He leads, and that hard leads to life and joy. Always… So I urge you to…
Choose life.

[Holly Montoya · Rating 5 out of 5]

Timing is everything! And Defiant Joy has been such a timely book for me. Stasi Eldredge has written with simultaneous gentleness and tenacity as she takes the reader on a journey of understanding true joy. This book is gritty - no fluff here. Stasi makes it clear from the beginning that the fake-it-til-you-make-it approach to being happy is not what works. Life is tough, really tough sometimes, and she advocates embracing, not stuffing, the depth of heart-wrenching emotions that come to us in those times. Stasi highlights specific obstacles in our quest for this lifestyle of defiant joy - certain things that are commonly experienced but have derailed many a traveler. Loneliness. Suffering. Self-condemnation. Unmet Needs. Comparison. Confusion about who God is. The author doesn't have to remind us that getting stuck in one of these pits is where many people stay. But she calls us to remember the signs that God has placed all around us, real evidence of His goodness in the midst of pain. Nurturing our hope in God's unchanging faithfulness, His promise that good will win in the end, is the thing that will buoy us back up from deep grief. Stasi makes this point - to remember that all the brokenness in the world and in our lives will be made whole and right by our Righteous God on a very real day in the future is KEY to living with defiant joy. In this book, Stasi has brought the reader back to where hope and joy are truly found - in the person of Jesus Christ.

-I was a recipient of an Advanced Readers Copy of Defiant Joy from the publishers.

[Joanne · Rating 5 out of 5]

I found this read to be very refreshing, encouraging, real and full of Biblical truths. I love and so appreciate how Stasi was so open with the realness of her own struggles and shared how she turned her heart to God not only in adversity but also in happy times. I could so relate to much of her story and am better for the insights I can take away for my own journey. Yes!!! Defiant Joy!!! Held tight by the One who loves me most. Thank you, thank you, thank you, to Stasi and Jesus for coming into my life!!! There IS Joy in my journey. Hope in my heart. With gratitude, I too, choose to live my life defiantly with Joy!!! I highly recommend this book and was blessed to have received an Advance Reader Copy of the book from the publisher.

[Stormy Rothkamm-Hambrice · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was the first book I’ve read by Stasi Eldredge but it won’t be my last! Defiant Joy, Taking Hold of Hope, Beauty and Life in a Hurting World is a great read. I read through this book pretty quickly the first time and marked it all up with notes and thought about how I feel. Things that I agree with or struggle with. I plan to go back and read it more slowly and think about my personal struggles and how I can personally grow deeper in my faith. Reminding myself to look for Joy instead of happiness is a choice I make everyday!

[Chloe (Always Booked) · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really liked this book! I read it with a group and I think that is definitely the way to do it. This book is about PRACTICING joy, even when life here on earth is hard and circumstances are not happy. I highlighted a lot about what joy is, how we get it (by chasing after Christ and gratitude) and had a lot of relatable quotes. Overall, I would recommend this a lot!

[Casey · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5 🌟

The audio for this book is done by the author which really added to my experience. I felt like I was there with her. I loved how the book addressed joy in the midst of different types of pain and trials and grief and what that looks like. Easy to listen to, easy to understand, solid theology. God used this in a season of life where it was needed.

[Sharon Kalt · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is definitely one that I will pull off the shelf and read again often. I enjoyed reading and pausing through it slowly, allowing its wisdom and encouragement to sink in and breathe joyous hope into my life in Christ.

[Michelle · Rating 3 out of 5]

There was a lot of truth and encouragement in this book, but I was hoping for more depth personally. There were few personal examples or examples from literature and of the ones there were, I didn't easily connect with them.

[Abbey Phipps · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was surprised by how much I enjoyed this book! Stasi is a gifted writer and delivers the joy of the gospel and the heart of the Father well through her stories, studies of Scripture, and application of the two together.

[Amber Allen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Defiant joy! Needed more than ever

[Emily Eshleman · Rating 5 out of 5]

The last chapter had me weeping. So encouraging to be reminded to fight for joy in the midst of this broken and painful world

[Ginger Marshall · Rating 5 out of 5]

Defiant Joy - Taking Hold of Hope, Beauty, and Life in a Hurting World is truly like sitting on the front porch with your best friend engaging in a true and real conversation. In a world where true heart to heart conversations are becoming fewer, this book hit a place in my soul that longs for honest communication. It helps you to realize that happiness and joy are two very distinct experiences. Staci shares her real life struggles with choosing Joy, which in return makes you realize you are not alone it the wrest for joy in the midst of this stormy life. I received an advanced readers copy and the timing couldn’t have been more perfect. I plan to share this book with many of my friends who wrestle with finding joy in the difficult moments of life.

[Renée · Rating 4 out of 5]

I am in a hard season of life where the harshness of this world is particularly tangible and constantly trying to steal my joy. Nevertheless, I haven’t lost that deep joy that comes from knowing Jesus. Glory to God! And I definitely have many things in my life that make the joy in my heart expand further. But that doesn’t mean life is easy and it doesn’t make the pain hurt any less. I found in this book someone who understood my situation and someone who pointed me to Jesus. And that was exactly what I was looking for. I underlined a lot in this book for when I grab it off the shelf again when I need someone to acknowledge my pain and point me to Jesus. Our ultimate joy is in Him.

[Angela Bailey · Rating 4 out of 5]

“It is in His Presence that we will know the fullness of joy.”

“To know God’s love is to be able to stand in gusts and gales, and though our bodies be knocked over, our souls remain standing strong.”

“We need to stop our running. We need to tend our hearts. One of the best ways we can do that is by facing the true story of our lives, and then inviting Jesus into it.”

[Jessica Williamson Colston · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not my cup of tea at all but I’m trying to be better about finishing what I start!

[Lori Jorgensen · Rating 5 out of 5]

What if you could live beyond happy, sad, depressed with unwavering JOY? You can try to control your happy life but with circumstantial happiness is an emotional roller coaster that no one wants to live. Joy is something totally different. It’s rooted in God and His kingdom. This book is life changing and a must have for these days are so so hard!!!