Nähe: Wie wir lieben und begehren

by Giovanni Frazzetto, Nele Junghanns

Eine junge Frau legt sich einen imaginären Freund zu – damit sie endlich Ruhe vor ihren besorgten Eltern hat. Ein Theaterschauspieler liebt seine Ehefrau – und geht dennoch fremd. Vater und Tochter verstehen sich nicht, doch ihre Beziehung blüht auf, als sein Tod naht. Acht Geschichten darüber, wie Menschen in unserer Gesellschaft versuchen, einander näherzukommen – und welche Rolle Hormone, Gene und soziale Normen dabei spielen. Was reizt uns an Monogamie, was an Untreue? Wie hält Freundschaft, wie entsteht Intimität? Leichtfüßig verknüpft Giovanni Frazzetto dramatische Erzählung und neueste Erkenntnisse aus Biologie und Hirnforschung und entdeckt so die Liebe auf umfassende Weise neu.

Genres: Nonfiction, Psychology, Relationships, Science, Research, Love

209 pages, Kindle Edition

First published June 29, 2017

About the author

Giovanni Frazzetto grew up on the South-East coast of Sicily. After high school, he moved to the UK to study science at University College London and in 2002 he received a PhD from the European Molecular Biology Laboratory in Heidelberg. In his work, Giovanni connects literature and science. He has contributed to the international magazines Nature and Science and has written for Haaretz, the Irish Times, the Financial Times, Village Magazine, the Huffingtom Post and Psychology Today.

In 2008, for his cross-disciplinary and science communication efforts he was awarded the John Kendrew Young Scientist Award. Giovanni loves the sea, cooking, multimedia storytelling, whistling and learning foreign languages. He is fluent in Italian, German and French, and has conversational Portuguese, Greek and Russian and basic Hebrew. He has started to learn Irish. He is not good at giving street directions.
He now lives in Dún Laoghaire, Ireland.

Reviews

[Graeme · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book has no discernible theme or thesis. Mr. Frazetti presents inconclusive accounts of various relationships (or people who lack relationships) salted with enough hormones and neurotransmitters to add a scientific patina. Recommended for those who like to talk about relationships at sleepovers, but never come to any conclusions before they fall asleep.

[Abigail · Rating 2 out of 5]

it was ok, just felt that there was more story than factual evidence and learned nothing I didn't already know. I also didn't gain any deep insight into human intimacy and relationships.

[Beth Easton · Rating 3 out of 5]

Interesting mixture of stories

[belton :) · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars

it kinda ate, I think? lol. this is like the very first nonfiction book I read for fun and I quite liked it. I really enjoy the topics of love and intimacy and relationships and such I just find human interaction so fascinating. and this book was really easy for me to read. especially bc I enjoyed the topics it discussed. the writing was alright. there were some sentences that were clunky and odd which made it a lil difficult to read at times. and I think there were a few grammatical errors if I am not mistaken LMAO. anyways the writing was mid ig. this book is a cute collection of stories that all have to do with different types of relationships and friendships and such and I did enjoy all of the stories to varying degrees. my favorites were definitely "Transit of Venus," "Split or Steal," and "Yes." I was really happy to find out that this book also deals with gay relationships and not just straight ones bc most of the time when books are talking about scientific research about relationships they mainly focus on heterosexual relationships but this one does a good job on focusing on both. Transit of Venus was just really interesting bc I found the research on infidelity and cheating to be so fascinating. Split or Steal was just interesting to me bc it talks about the attachment styles (e.g. secure, anxious, avoidant) and I personally am really interested in learning about that type of stuff. I already familiarized myself with the types of attachment styles before reading this book and just reading more about it was quite dope. Yes was just very heartfelt and cute lol. I also love the topic of physical touch in this story. especially when Frazzetto mentions how skin is its own language. I found that dope af. most, if not all, of the stories were supes cute but that's like all I have to say about them LMAO. would I recommend you read it? I mean if you're like me and you're actually interested in these topics then maybe you'll find it interesting. but tbh I didn't find any of the info in this book to be like revolutionary or anything so. it's a good read, and it takes these psychological theories and places them within characters which is nice. anyways that's all I really have to say about this book. I love learning about human relationships and such so I will be reading more nonfiction about this topic.

[Magdalena · Rating 1 out of 5]

Mr Frazzetto lost me about 16 pages into his book when he described "a set of groundbreaking experiments" by Harry Harlow involving infant monkeys being separated from their mothers.

First, he recounted how infant monkeys were given "unusual ... surrogate mothers" made from wire mesh. "In a subsequent set of experiments [...] infant monkeys were exposed to stress." More details followed.

I read a few more paragraphs and stopped, closed the book, and threw it in the recycling bin. A small loss, as the first 16 pages, even without animal abuse, were mediocre at best!

If I wanted to read a highly cliched book whose first chapter was about a beautiful, intelligent, and highly successful woman, still single in her 40s, I would've done so by now. Not saying that amazing women can't be single, but Mr Frazzetto brings nothing fresh to the table!

Also, those poor infant monkeys that were taken away from their mothers, well, they never successfully integrated back into their tribes.

Mr Frazzetto should study the art and science of compassion next! It'd serve him right!

In a nutshell, 16 mediocre pages, animal abuse, recycling bin. Not even worth one star!

[Moni · Rating 4 out of 5]

https://www.buchundwort.de/naehe/

[Susie Wang]

This one is actually a pretty interesting read. The author used several realistic short stories to demonstrate her theories. The stories are not too bad to read. Though I wasn't all that interested in the theory part, I agreed with most of what I read.

[Fräulein Müller · Rating 4 out of 5]

Kurzgeschichten über Nähe, Liebe und Begehren in unterschiedlichen zwischenmenschlichen Beziehungen; gepaart mit viel Wissenschaft. Wow!

Ich habe das Buch vor einem Jahr durch Zufall entdeckt und nach all den New Adult Büchern Lust verspürt, mal wieder etwas "Richtiges" zu lesen. Ein Buch, das mir einen Mehrwert gibt. Na, ihr wisst sicherlich, was ich meine. Keine lapidare Geschichte eben, sondern ein Buch mit Tiefe, das Spuren hinterlässt und zum Nachdenken anregt.

All das hat "Nähe: Wir wir lieben und begehren" unter einen Hut gebracht. Die Kurzgeschichten waren perfekt lang, um das Gelesene verinnerlichen zu können. Die wissenschaftlichen Infos zu Studien und co. waren sehr lehrreich, gleichwohl ich öfters über das ein oder andere Fremdwort gestolpert bin, was meinen Lesefluss ein wenig gestört und mich selbst sehr beansprucht hat. An dieser Stelle muss ich gestehen, dass ich mir verständlichere (Leser nahe?) Begriffe/Erklärungen gewünscht hätte.

Insgesamt aber ein wirklich tolles Buch mit viel Tiefe und Wissenschaft.

[Linda · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved the concept that this author used in this book which was to combine a bunch of short stories on love based on lovers, friends, and family. I loved how unique this book was and how many inspirational quotes that were in this book.

[Vanmeera · Rating 4 out of 5]

Spannendes Buchformat mit acht Kurzgeschichten zu romantischen, familiären und freundschaftlichen Formen von emotionaler Nähe, die immer wieder von wissenschaftlichen Erklärungen zu dargestellten Verhaltensweisen unterbrochen werden

[Michelle Olms · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book

[Wright · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5 stars

[Lucas · Rating 4 out of 5]

A high rating for the novelty of combining fiction and non-fiction prose.

[Young · Rating 2 out of 5]

The episodes are somewhat cheesy, just a whole bunch of happily-ever-after styles.

[Courtney Sells-Cunningham · Rating 4 out of 5]

Therapist recommended a bunch of books on intimacy. This was one.

[Jessica · Rating 4 out of 5]

Delightful read! I enjoyed the format, and all of the references to outside studies and other texts. My only wish is that it was longer.

[Simone · Rating 2 out of 5]

Meh was more a collection of random stories, nothing particularly helpful or insightful

[Diva Prestia · Rating 4 out of 5]

continuing my journey in my smart girl nonfiction era part 7 ✨

i like how this used a detailed story to outline the theme of each chapter and then interspersed psychological information and research findings to round it all out. there was a good balance between story and info. plus the stories were very interesting, i honestly got really invested. like INVESTED. it was so fun to read. and i like how it covered so many different types of intimacy. it was short and sweet, spent minimal time talking about the animal kingdom, and some of the language genuinely made me laugh out loud really hard. beautiful!

a part i found so interesting is that when you see something, you process it in the occipital lobe and the image passes up through the temporal and parietal lobes, but when you’re envisioning something in your mind, the process is reversed. that’s so cool!!

also FUCK RYAN AND VANESSA. you dirty dogs. despicable behaviour. who the fuck proposes to their girlfriend of two years OVER THE PHONE and then CHEATS ON THEM TWO DAYS LATER?? DIRTY DOGS, that’s who

“it’s hard to give when those we give to don’t know how to receive.”

[Ayaan Q · Rating 2 out of 5]

What I got from the book is this: Communication, self esteem, and relationship stability prior to a commitment is vital to a strong, intimate relationship after marriage. Have the maturity to have an open heart.