Understanding and Addressing Everyday Incivility delves into the day-to-day annoying behaviors that color our interactions with other people, such as the use of crude language in public; family members who claim that they're "just teasing" and we're "too sensitive" when we're the target of their incivility; coworkers who prevent us from accomplishing tasks; and inflammatory remarks posted on social media sites.
Lane explores what is considered uncivil behavior, why we label some acts as crude or selfish while others are deemed polite and proper, and how these labels often change from one context to the next. She highlights the power dynamics at play in our interactions, and explains how "rude" behavior can sometimes be beneficial--and vice versa. Rather than a simplistic manual of manners, Lane provides both the tools to understand everyday incivility and strategies for responding effectively and appropriately to what we interpret as incivility.
Parts of civility: Respect, responsibility, restraint and ethics (which really could just be a subcategory of “responsibility,” I think) as opposed to manners, which are rituals different cultures abide by (44-45).
Recognizes how civility can have "good, bad and virtue"--how civilty can enforce conformity. Of course, we always think we are justified in our breaking civility, when the other guy is definitely not .
Chapters about incivility at work, at home, online etc. with end-of-chapter pull outs on how to try to combat incivilty. For example, for everyday incivility online, the author recommends reporting abuse on social media, making use of "netiquette" information and reporting trolls to their companies if appropriate.
Chapter about power factors, microaggressions, etc.
Not an easy read. Clinical & dry. Hard to stay engaged. The book approaches our deteriorating and increasingly uncivil society from a psychological and humanistic viewpoint and omits the spiritual perspective. Overall, the book falls short.