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A vida cristã no lar
A família está em perigo. Edificar uma família sob bases cristãs, em nossos dias, é um enorme desafio. Lares cristãos estáveis têm se tornado cada vez mais incomuns. Vivemos tempos em que o casamento tem sido redefinido, a disciplina bíblica está sob pesado ataque e os valores familiares estão em cheque. O próprio conceito de família tem sido questionado. Neste livro, somos lembrados pelo experiente ministro e especialista em aconselhamento cristão, Jay E. Adams, que a família é a primeira instituição de Deus e que devemos seguir as orientações das Escrituras para estabelecermos famílias cristãs fortes, unidas e estáveis. Adams oferece nesta obra princípios bíblicos fundamentais sobre a família, além de diversos conselhos muito práticos sobre a dinâmica familiar. Um livro necessário para todo cristão!
216 pages, Paperback
First published November 1, 1972
30 people are currently reading
440 people want to read
About the author
Jay E. Adams
230 books146 followersJay Edward Adams is a Reformed Christian author. He has written over 100 books and these have been published in sixteen languages.
He received a Bachelor of Divinity from Reformed Episcopal Seminary, a Bachelor of Arts in Classics from Johns Hopkins University,a Masters in Sacred Theology from Temple University, and a PhD in Speech from the University of Missouri.
Adams' book Competent to Counsel launched the nouthetic counseling movement, a movement whose aim was to use strictly biblical counseling methods. He is the founder of the Intitute for Nothetic Studies.
He received a Bachelor of Divinity from Reformed Episcopal Seminary, a Bachelor of Arts in Classics from Johns Hopkins University,a Masters in Sacred Theology from Temple University, and a PhD in Speech from the University of Missouri.
Adams' book Competent to Counsel launched the nouthetic counseling movement, a movement whose aim was to use strictly biblical counseling methods. He is the founder of the Intitute for Nothetic Studies.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 44 reviews
August 14, 2020
In his brief volume on domestic relationship dynamics, Christian Living in the Home, Jay Adams applies his distinctively biblical (nouthetic) counseling approach and principles to the realities of home and family life. In doing so, he not only distills his more expansive work into a succinct monograph, but he also explores what might be called a theology of the family. While this book is light on research, it contains a number of useful anecdotes and illustrations which Adams has drawn from his own experience and imagination. With the onslaught of massive and wide-ranging societal confusion on matters of the home, family, marriage, and gender, this little book continues to be useful to pastors and biblical counselors today. Because Adams consistently seeks to apply God’s Word to domestic realities, his approach bears similarities to his theological forebears while casting a godly vision for family relationships. God’s Word is as relevant for God’s covenant community (and the families which comprise it) today as it always has been.
For Adams, Christ’s spiritual presence distinguishes Christian homes from their non-Christian counterparts and neighbors. The effect which Christ has on the Christian home is manifested in at least three ways in the context of family relationships, the dynamics of which are the focus of the book. First, Christians – under the conviction of the Holy Spirit – more or less readily recognize and own up to their sins (11). Second, Christians – with the help of the Holy Spirit – know how to address their sins (12). Third, Christians – in the power of the Holy Spirit – experience progressive sanctification out of life-dominating sins (12). In characteristic fashion, Adams homes in on the sinfulness of sin rather than the sickliness of man’s fallen nature. Because sin in families can be addressed, there is hope for the repentant (15-19). Adams wisely emphasizes that more so than in any other social setting, proper handling of conflict “is needed preeminently in the Christian home, where there are the most intimate of human relationships, and also where as sinners we run into each other day by day” (37). Whereas the foregoing review of the nouthetic approach as applied in the home environment bears all of the hallmarks of the counseling principles and methodologies in other books by Adams, much of the rest of the book could reasonably be mistaken for the writings of older Reformed authors outlining family piety.
In the fourth chapter, "Bible Basics About the Family" (43-57), Adams articulates a theology of the family that resembles older Reformed literature on the family. In describing the foundational nature of the family for all human society, Adams notes that God ordained the covenant of marriage (44-45), God made marriage good (45), men and women relate in a complementary manner (47-49), and the marriage covenant has priority over the parent-child relationship (52). In the course of bringing these facts together into an integrated whole, Adams testifies to the fact that the family “was first because it is basic” (44) and, “Marriage is the most basic unit in human society” (51). These statements could be echoes of an insight from one particularly relevant Samuel Davies (1723-61) sermon. In the sermon, entitled "The Necessity and Excellence of Family Religion," Davies characterized the family (understood as a household) as “a radical society from which all others are derived.” The family unit, comprised most basically of a husband and a wife united in marriage, is the root social reality out of which all other societies grow and develop. Adams and Davies are agreed: the family’s place in society is at the foundation.
This is an important reminder to aspiring and current ministers of the gospel. We may be tempted to reduce all of society to the church. After all, Adam functioned as a priest, worship is one of the only legitimate activities recorded in the earliest chapters of Genesis, and our vocation as faithful shepherds imitating the Good Shepherd involves laying down our lives for the sheep (John 10:11). However, when we forget that our roles as fathers, husbands, sons, and brothers are more basic than our roles as pastors, preachers, and churchmen, we risk setting up our churches for disappointment and our families for heartache. In order to be qualified for leadership in the church, men must demonstrate leadership in the family (1 Timothy 3:4-5). Adams defines family leadership as “seeing that all the members of the family are cared for” (92). If a man regularly and consistently fails in exercising godly leadership in the family, how can he be expected to exercise godly leadership in the church (as either an Elder or a Deacon)? This question must be ever before us. Ministers of the gospel must be reminded constantly of their responsibilities in the home. Adams sets forth such reminders with alacrity, conviction, and hope.
Apart from some stylistic idiosyncrasies, the most noticeable deficiency of the book relates to Adams's counsel in the ninth chapter, "How to Live with an Unbelieving Husband" (127-138). Operating from within the nouthetic counseling methodology, there is nothing objectionable about this chapter content. However, it is missing any extended discussion of what to do in matters of spousal abuse. Especially in his discussion of abandonment and divorce (130-131), Adams would have done well to include some material – even if just a brief digression – on guiding principles in cases of abuse. Based on anecdotal experience and accounts, I suspect that incidents of spousal abuse are on the rise in American culture and society. At the very least, men and women are more freely reporting such incidents. Pastors need more guidance than ever on how best to approach this pressing issue.
For Adams, Christ’s spiritual presence distinguishes Christian homes from their non-Christian counterparts and neighbors. The effect which Christ has on the Christian home is manifested in at least three ways in the context of family relationships, the dynamics of which are the focus of the book. First, Christians – under the conviction of the Holy Spirit – more or less readily recognize and own up to their sins (11). Second, Christians – with the help of the Holy Spirit – know how to address their sins (12). Third, Christians – in the power of the Holy Spirit – experience progressive sanctification out of life-dominating sins (12). In characteristic fashion, Adams homes in on the sinfulness of sin rather than the sickliness of man’s fallen nature. Because sin in families can be addressed, there is hope for the repentant (15-19). Adams wisely emphasizes that more so than in any other social setting, proper handling of conflict “is needed preeminently in the Christian home, where there are the most intimate of human relationships, and also where as sinners we run into each other day by day” (37). Whereas the foregoing review of the nouthetic approach as applied in the home environment bears all of the hallmarks of the counseling principles and methodologies in other books by Adams, much of the rest of the book could reasonably be mistaken for the writings of older Reformed authors outlining family piety.
In the fourth chapter, "Bible Basics About the Family" (43-57), Adams articulates a theology of the family that resembles older Reformed literature on the family. In describing the foundational nature of the family for all human society, Adams notes that God ordained the covenant of marriage (44-45), God made marriage good (45), men and women relate in a complementary manner (47-49), and the marriage covenant has priority over the parent-child relationship (52). In the course of bringing these facts together into an integrated whole, Adams testifies to the fact that the family “was first because it is basic” (44) and, “Marriage is the most basic unit in human society” (51). These statements could be echoes of an insight from one particularly relevant Samuel Davies (1723-61) sermon. In the sermon, entitled "The Necessity and Excellence of Family Religion," Davies characterized the family (understood as a household) as “a radical society from which all others are derived.” The family unit, comprised most basically of a husband and a wife united in marriage, is the root social reality out of which all other societies grow and develop. Adams and Davies are agreed: the family’s place in society is at the foundation.
This is an important reminder to aspiring and current ministers of the gospel. We may be tempted to reduce all of society to the church. After all, Adam functioned as a priest, worship is one of the only legitimate activities recorded in the earliest chapters of Genesis, and our vocation as faithful shepherds imitating the Good Shepherd involves laying down our lives for the sheep (John 10:11). However, when we forget that our roles as fathers, husbands, sons, and brothers are more basic than our roles as pastors, preachers, and churchmen, we risk setting up our churches for disappointment and our families for heartache. In order to be qualified for leadership in the church, men must demonstrate leadership in the family (1 Timothy 3:4-5). Adams defines family leadership as “seeing that all the members of the family are cared for” (92). If a man regularly and consistently fails in exercising godly leadership in the family, how can he be expected to exercise godly leadership in the church (as either an Elder or a Deacon)? This question must be ever before us. Ministers of the gospel must be reminded constantly of their responsibilities in the home. Adams sets forth such reminders with alacrity, conviction, and hope.
Apart from some stylistic idiosyncrasies, the most noticeable deficiency of the book relates to Adams's counsel in the ninth chapter, "How to Live with an Unbelieving Husband" (127-138). Operating from within the nouthetic counseling methodology, there is nothing objectionable about this chapter content. However, it is missing any extended discussion of what to do in matters of spousal abuse. Especially in his discussion of abandonment and divorce (130-131), Adams would have done well to include some material – even if just a brief digression – on guiding principles in cases of abuse. Based on anecdotal experience and accounts, I suspect that incidents of spousal abuse are on the rise in American culture and society. At the very least, men and women are more freely reporting such incidents. Pastors need more guidance than ever on how best to approach this pressing issue.
August 16, 2024
More than anything, I grew to love Adam's voice. He has a bullish way of trying to persuade, in a way that initially caught me off guard. But what is ultimately trying to persuade the reader of is to have hope and trust in the gospel. And he seems to really understand where pastoral/counseling wisdom is going to fall short and we need to suffer for the gospel-- even in our own family. Refreshingly not a self-help book.
July 22, 2019
Livro pequeno, mas profundo. O conteúdo é bom e denso, com algumas ressalvas:
1) Adams é um extremista quando se trata dos aspectos psicológicos do homem, e da forma como o próprio corpo interage com esses processos. Se o leitor entender o contexto em que ele escreveu o livro e conseguir filtrar essas partes, não há problema, isso não anula o resto do conteúdo.
2) Quando fala da submissão da mulher ele parece muito equilibrado, até chegar na parte em que diz que uma mulher não pode ser professora, porque essa é uma profissão de exercício de autoridade sobre os homens. Discordo desse ponto.
No mais, o livro tem grandes ensinamentos para um lar cristão. Algumas partes específicas sobre a disciplina de filhos me chamaram a atenção e me fizeram pensar de forma diferente.
1) Adams é um extremista quando se trata dos aspectos psicológicos do homem, e da forma como o próprio corpo interage com esses processos. Se o leitor entender o contexto em que ele escreveu o livro e conseguir filtrar essas partes, não há problema, isso não anula o resto do conteúdo.
2) Quando fala da submissão da mulher ele parece muito equilibrado, até chegar na parte em que diz que uma mulher não pode ser professora, porque essa é uma profissão de exercício de autoridade sobre os homens. Discordo desse ponto.
No mais, o livro tem grandes ensinamentos para um lar cristão. Algumas partes específicas sobre a disciplina de filhos me chamaram a atenção e me fizeram pensar de forma diferente.
August 5, 2021
I read this one together with my wife, and my in-laws gave it to me as a gift a while back. Adams was the foremost proponent of, and the founder, the modern Biblical counseling movement. It's an excellent introduction to a practical Christian understanding of family living. Included in this are such areas as wives' roles, husband's roles, children, discipline, basic theological understandings, and several others. It's a brief, yet accessible, book that one can read quickly in a few sittings. It's helpful, practical, biblical wisdom served in less than 150 pages.
I do have a few critiques about the book. First is that the book is outdated in numerous places. It's a fifty year old book that still has a lot of practical advice and wisdom, but a lot of his nomenclature and cultural speech is a mark of someone raised in the 1940-50 era and writing in the 70s. Second, some of his illustrations and extended "chats" are quite campy, cliched, and some are downright cringey (see the one about the bread cookbook in the wives section to get my meaning). Third, some chapters are not as strong as others. His best ones, in my opinion, are discipline, husband's roles, and the unbelieving spouse chapters. His chapters on single people in the church and the section on wives have more cultural and perceptive advice than biblical wisdom in numerous places. They're not totally useless, but there are more helpful books to turn to for those two topics.
The book is quite practical and easily accessible for numerous people. If you're a young couple, a counselor or one who's interested in counseling, or a Christian seeking advice on how a Christian household operates in several areas, then this book is helpful. I'd use a different book for premarital counseling or something more in depth for a deeper issue, but it's a helpful book due to the easy reading and shortness of the book.
I do have a few critiques about the book. First is that the book is outdated in numerous places. It's a fifty year old book that still has a lot of practical advice and wisdom, but a lot of his nomenclature and cultural speech is a mark of someone raised in the 1940-50 era and writing in the 70s. Second, some of his illustrations and extended "chats" are quite campy, cliched, and some are downright cringey (see the one about the bread cookbook in the wives section to get my meaning). Third, some chapters are not as strong as others. His best ones, in my opinion, are discipline, husband's roles, and the unbelieving spouse chapters. His chapters on single people in the church and the section on wives have more cultural and perceptive advice than biblical wisdom in numerous places. They're not totally useless, but there are more helpful books to turn to for those two topics.
The book is quite practical and easily accessible for numerous people. If you're a young couple, a counselor or one who's interested in counseling, or a Christian seeking advice on how a Christian household operates in several areas, then this book is helpful. I'd use a different book for premarital counseling or something more in depth for a deeper issue, but it's a helpful book due to the easy reading and shortness of the book.
August 5, 2021
A useful, accessible little book with strong wisdom and biblically faithful basics. There are several outdated elements and examples (to the point of being funny), particularly related to singleness. The "A Word to the Wives" chapter was biblically faithful, but many of the comments and contextualizations were less than helpful, particularly regarding bread baking. The "Discipline with Dignity" chapter was excellent, while still being brief. The first several chapters that provide biblical foundations, including the understanding of sin in the home and communication would benefit anyone. This book would be very different if it was rewritten in 2021, but it remains a useful introduction.
May 30, 2025
Jay Adams draws upon his extensive experience as a biblical counselor, which is evident throughout the book. The worksheets are helpful, although a few of them can be difficult to interpret in terms of what they are asking you to do. Overall, this is a valuable resource for married couples, as it covers all aspects of family life.
January 19, 2023
Very enjoyable, easy read. Practical, biblical advice for the whole family.
August 18, 2019
The title suggests that the audience for this book is Christians, however, the author argues for biblical marital roles as if he's dealing with unbelievers. He talks down to women and sets up strawmen scenarios that assume the wife will resist the idea of submission. In addition, the title indicates that the audience is Christian families, but there's a chapter for singles as well as a chapter for the wife living with an unbelieving husband.
The author spends most of the book defending the biblical idea of marriage, roles, and discipline. I was expecting more practical and applicable guidelines for how to establish Christian living in the home rather than a biblical defence for why you should establish Christian living in the home. The questions and/or worksheets at the end of each chapter were not very helpful.
Finally, the quality of printing in this book is terrible. It is light throughout the whole book; never dark and crisp. In some areas it gets lighter which makes it very difficult to read. I expected much higher quality since I purchased this book directly from P&R Publishing Company.
I do not recommend that anyone buy this book due to the substandard quality and the disappointing content.
The author spends most of the book defending the biblical idea of marriage, roles, and discipline. I was expecting more practical and applicable guidelines for how to establish Christian living in the home rather than a biblical defence for why you should establish Christian living in the home. The questions and/or worksheets at the end of each chapter were not very helpful.
Finally, the quality of printing in this book is terrible. It is light throughout the whole book; never dark and crisp. In some areas it gets lighter which makes it very difficult to read. I expected much higher quality since I purchased this book directly from P&R Publishing Company.
I do not recommend that anyone buy this book due to the substandard quality and the disappointing content.
September 2, 2014
I am not sure a better book exists or has been written of this length that deals with the beauty of the Christian home in a more succinct and biblical manner than this work by Jay Adams. I read this book in seminary (at RPTS) and liked it then, but 6 more years of marriage later and re-reading this book it really strikes me how picture perfect this work is for those looking to understand the proper roles of husbands, wives, and children in the Christian faith and how much all of us have to learn to be better husbands, wives, and children.
Highly Recommend.
Highly Recommend.
December 9, 2021
Jay Adams walks you through what a biblical family is and how it should operate. He gives biblical principles and advice concerning marriage and the biblical roles of the husband and wife, how to discipline, child rearing, leadership, sex, responsibilities, communication, and viewing many more topics through the lens of Scripture.
July 15, 2015
~ Aty ku ka jete shpirterore, do te kete edhe rritje shpirterore.
~ Menyra me e mire per tu bere nje baba i mire per femijet e tu eshte te jesh nje burre i mire per mamane e tyre.
DASHURIA ESHTE GJITHNJE NEN KONTROLL.
~ Menyra me e mire per tu bere nje baba i mire per femijet e tu eshte te jesh nje burre i mire per mamane e tyre.
DASHURIA ESHTE GJITHNJE NEN KONTROLL.
February 25, 2016
I really appreciated this book. It was easy to read (it only took two days to read), and yet had many good, helpful insights.
November 27, 2016
An excellent study of the Christian family.
February 4, 2022
A very practical book that points straight to Scripture in terms of helping the believer understand obedience in the various roles and facets of the family. The contents of this book must be taken in context, and must be understood from a biblical worldview, as someone who believes and understands that scripture is the authority. Any of the author’s points, taken out of context, would likely incense an unbeliever. It would just be too difficult for them to understand without having the whole counsel of God as their context.
With that being said, I feel that the husband and wife sections of this book are excellent sections that could be shared with young men and women as they are being disciples; both in pre-marriage, and even as teens. To understand the role of a husband and the role of a wife from a biblical point of view well in advance of entering marriage would be a very good thing.
With that being said, I feel that the husband and wife sections of this book are excellent sections that could be shared with young men and women as they are being disciples; both in pre-marriage, and even as teens. To understand the role of a husband and the role of a wife from a biblical point of view well in advance of entering marriage would be a very good thing.
December 18, 2019
The book was so short, it was hard not to like it. It didn't get bogged down with examples, and offered Biblical based practical ideas to make a marriage better.
It struggled with some of the same issues the other books did. It is still a tinge on the vague side that it could apply to anyone. The saving grace here is the short length. Anyone could read this for a counseling session or just to get a little help in their marriage.
It doesn't offer anything different or special than the other books, but it offers it in a much shorter more approachable package.
It struggled with some of the same issues the other books did. It is still a tinge on the vague side that it could apply to anyone. The saving grace here is the short length. Anyone could read this for a counseling session or just to get a little help in their marriage.
It doesn't offer anything different or special than the other books, but it offers it in a much shorter more approachable package.
May 2, 2022
Great resource on marriage, family, and communication. Encouraging and written in Adam's trademark conversational style. Adam's books are always easy to read (not simplistic, but simple). Clear, Biblical, practical. Not as good as Wayne Mack's marriage book, but still a great book (and Mack quoted this book quite generously).
January 14, 2020
Great resource with instruction for family life and God-given roles! I found this book to be refreshingly old-fashioned (it was written before I was born), but nonetheless, still very relevant and applicable to modern home life.
January 27, 2019
Christian Living in the Home is a great book, I would like to know if you have this book translated in Spanish language and if you do where I can Buy it.
Thnks
Luz Marian B
Thnks
Luz Marian B
October 1, 2020
Fantastic advice for any parents... Especially the Christian parent.
March 25, 2021
da hätte ich mir mehr erwartet...
March 9, 2022
Best book on the subject.
May 19, 2024
Wonderful read with a lot of great information.
October 26, 2024
Some of the concepts in this book are a bit outdated, but overall a good read on marriage roles
March 17, 2025
Big idea
Christian living and loving begins at home. The Christian family needs to stop listen and learn from the wisdom of the Bible
Christian living and loving begins at home. The Christian family needs to stop listen and learn from the wisdom of the Bible
April 21, 2025
Good, with practical advice for different categories within the families: children, wives, husbands, married with non-christian spouses.
June 19, 2025
A great resource. Direct and to the point. Great to use for couples getting married and those already married.
October 30, 2022
Direct and to the point. He does not beat around the bush. Much is stated rather than argued so if you are not sympathetic to Adam's approach you may find yourself disagreeing. Lots of practical advice and helps for Christian parents.
November 24, 2013
Small easy-to-read book suitable for a courting/newly-wed couple to read together, as they strive to build a home that is Christ-centered. It offers practical advice on how we, essentially sinners, can live together as a family. Besides devoting a chapter each on communication as well as roles of a husband, a wife and parents, also appreciate the author's focus on singles as well as Christians who are facing the challenge of living with an unbeliever. The worksheets/inventory checks behind most chapters help readers in their reflection.
April 11, 2016
Excellent book for every member of the family. Whether you're married, plan to get married or want to understand what family should look like. This is a great read and I highly recommend it. Adams walks faithfully through scripture pointing out the purpose of marriage and our duties in the home. I was very convicted by this book and I guarantee you'll enjoy it as it is a great way to glorify God and how we are to honor Him with our lives.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 44 reviews