Liked: Karan makes honest confessions about his weight, how it affected his self-esteem, made his teenage years miserable, repressed him sexually. We love to say, weight is nothing, love your body, it's the inside that counts. But the scars of weighty issues (or body image), won't disappear by mouthing ideologies. Interlinked with this is an unhealthy relationship with food, something I've had for long. The way it eventually ruins you and you can do nothing because you're so dependent.
Kudos to this talented filmmaker for opening up about his fears, struggles, trying to come to terms with his sexuality. How he lived through being called a pansy, effeminate. This was saddest, someone not allowed to be themselves, ridiculed on something as fluid as gender. Even the title, his anguish at being seen as an unsuitable boy, it's painful. Imagine having to hide your life, be apologetic.
I enjoyed reading about processes of filmmaking, of ideas that went into beloved movies, behind the scenes. It even lent me a sort of confidence, that all successes, achievements, they come from a place of insecurity, anxiety, unsureness. No one actually knows what will work, what will not. We are experimenting, we are creating and doing things that fill us with a spark. And that is enough.
It was also fun reading about Karan's relationships and friendships, passions.
The bad: The style is terrible, it's one of the least well-written things I've read lately. It's flat, even the emotional sections are carelessly penned, like a hurriedly attended exam. And it's gratingly repetitive. The same thing repeated in 50 different sentence structures. Also annoyingly contradictory. In one page he says he watched movies, next he says he never watched any, again he says movies are in his DNA. Which one, you want to shake him, do you actually mean?
It's extremely narcissistic, but that's to be expected. It also casually masks sexist tendencies, nepotism (ahem), double standards. All human nature, grey, still discomforting.
Read if you like movies, gossip, success stories.