Jump to ratings and reviews
Rate this book

Deliverance #2

Conflicted

Rate this book
They say, ‘Be true to yourself and follow your heart.’

But what if the two things aren’t mutually exclusive?

If only one half is being honest, can you ever really be complete?

For years I was my own oppressor until I found my absolute.

He was the addiction I didn’t want to fight, one that nearly broke me.

But I knew, when it came to Casper, I was never going to be a survivor.

I enjoyed drowning too damn much.

129 pages, Paperback

First published April 17, 2018

15 people are currently reading
70 people want to read

About the author

Maria Macdonald

31 books372 followers
Maria Macdonald is an author who writes sometimes, but mostly procrastinates.

She's a serial Netflix watcher, an avid reader (often meaning she burns the dinner) and occasionally she'll throw a book out to her readers. She also likes tea and chocolate!

She writes Paranormal YA, romantic suspense, Coming of Age, MM, New Adult & contemporary romance.

Originally from London, she now lives in South West England.


You can catch up with her at - https://www.facebook.com/authormariam...

Ratings & Reviews

What do you think?
Rate this book

Friends & Following

Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!

Community Reviews

5 stars
25 (39%)
4 stars
26 (41%)
3 stars
8 (12%)
2 stars
4 (6%)
1 star
0 (0%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 34 reviews
Profile Image for DJ Sakata.
3,304 reviews1,780 followers
April 16, 2018
Favorite Quotes:

You know you can’t go back, right? … To before. To only a moment ago, when you were really in denial when you believed you could change who you truly are. Now your consciousness has recognized your soul. You can’t backtrack, can’t lock up the truth. All you have now is the lie… it’s your choice whether you live in it or not.

I believe there’s one person out there. One person who will fill every hole inside your soul. That person will stand by your side through the rough times and stand in front of you in the toughest. The person who’s always on your mind. Not just first thing in the morning and last thing at night, but also throughout your dreams… I don’t know what I’d do without her. It would be like living without my sight. I feel like maybe not everyone has one person, but I’ve always felt something inside of me. Almost a silent voice, telling me that when I meet her, I’d know, and when I love it will be forever. Never will there be anyone else for me. Not ever.

I’m sorry. This is hard for me, but I’m getting there slowly.” He shakes his head and looks conflicted. “That’s not an excuse… it’s—… I’m reaching for you… I am. Will you wait for me to settle my soul?

My Review:

Conflicted was a quick and captivating novella, written from the first person POV of Caden, a college student who recently came out about his sexuality to his dysfunctional family/currently divorcing parents, twin brother, friends, and teammates. I adored the gentle and witty Caden and his selfless and protective twin brother Tarrant. Early adulthood and college years are a stressful and trying time of life for the vast majority of creatures, but add in harassment and sexual identify issues and - yikes! Major struggles, yet Caden was highly insightful, supportive of others, and patiently finding his footing amongst the turmoil. The writing was emotive, angsty, and thoughtfully observant with licks of amusing humor and sweetness.
Profile Image for Nicole Emerald Book Reviews  McCurdy.
404 reviews61 followers
April 15, 2018
4.5 * review from Nicole @Emerald book reviews


A title was never more deserving for this beautiful and complicated love story. It’s been so long since I read a M/M romance that I forgot how much I truly enjoy them.  The complexities faced by both men, even in today’s society, the fear and uncertainty that lies ahead, the ramifications and upset that being in love can cause, simply because of who they are, not what they are.  The true essence of this book is about acceptance, not from other people, but knowing who you are deep down, coming face to face with the truth, and loving yourself before you can extend that love and devotion to someone else.


As always Maria Macdonald manages to capture the very real, pure and undiluted passion that brews between Caden and Casper from the get go but it’s the struggle and the very realistic and beautiful depiction of how one man has come to find peace and a breathtaking confidence within himself, while the other is seemingly floundering in a sea of chaos and confusion.


‘“Feelings are supposed to be pure.  They’re wild, primitive, raw, and should remain that way.  Existing in a natural state, that’s the only way to really love.  Casper, that’s the only way to really live.”’


There are some supremely terrifying incidents in this book, not in a blood-bath, serial killer kind of way, but in a devastating realisation kind of way, that men who love one another, or women who love one another are denied a chance at a less complicated life.  That they face slightly more challenges and prejudices than a heterosexual couple. It’s heartbreaking but at the end of it all, past all the trials and tribulations, Maria brings us to a wonderful and swoon-worthy climax. Nothing worth having is ever easy right?  

This book is startling in its realism, in its ardour, in its agony and in its ultimate commitment.  Maria is such a beautiful writer, her words move the scenes along so seamlessly, engaging, capturing, enthralling and the dialogue flows so spectacularly from one hero to the next, that you wish you could speak so eloquently to those you love.


If you want a stunning love story that melts your heart and has your emotions engaged way past The End, then definitely go pick up a copy of Conflicted today.
Profile Image for Nerdy Dirty & Flirty.
3,985 reviews363 followers
April 17, 2018
description
Angsty perfection…

Deep emotion, humour and love are hallmarks to this author’s stories and Caden and Casper’s is exactly that! I was so hoping for Caden’s story to be told and it was exactly what my heart hoped for…

Caden was finally in a place where he was comfortable with his sexuality. His family and friends supported him and he was confident once again in who he was. Casper was not at that place yet, quite the opposite in fact. Caden, however, was nothing if not persistent but in a way that was funny and loving. Casper was determined to resist but Caden is a force of nature…

“He’s bulldozed me by doing nothing except walking through an open door.”

All the characters in this angsty romance were warm and completely relatable. While the focus was on Caden and Casper, family and friends played a large part in their life and their relationship. There were ups and downs, lighter moments and many serious conversations along the way. Each step of the way had me cheering them on and hoping they would find their way…

There will be more for this group and I can’t wait!
Profile Image for C.J. Fallowfield.
Author 48 books761 followers
May 15, 2018
Conflicted, the second book in Macdonald’s Deliverance series, was a quicker read as a novella. We were first introduced to Caden in book one, where he was set up as a love interest for Laura, before he came out as gay and she fell for his twin brother Tarrant. Caden came across then, and still does now, as the more introspective of the twins, more quiet, shy, and in touch with his emotions. This gentleness made his treatment by the homophobic brigade all the more hurtful. It’s sad that events in this novella are still so prevalent in the world and only makes you realise how, especially in some areas where deep-rooted homophobia remains, how brave people are to stand up and say “this is me, accept me as I am” when there are such haters out there. Macdonald captured the conflict perfectly and wrote some beautiful lines and observations, I’d just have loved more emotional pull to elevate it from a 4 to a 5 star read for me. Looking forward to book three in the series. **I received an ARC from the author in exchange for my honest and unbiased review
4 reviews
April 18, 2018
Absolutely amazing book by my favourite author. She never seems to disappoint and gives so much more than a book when you read her book, she gives you life. I loved this book when I read it and I’d happily read it again. It was such a brilliant book was so heartfelt and the love was so raw and beautiful. Well done Maria for another perfect book!
Profile Image for Renee at Book Happiness.
1,486 reviews36 followers
April 17, 2018
I received this for an honest review.. now I usually dont go for the MM books but because this author is one of my faves and I love the first one I had to read this and I am so glad I did....

I loved this book!!!!

Awesome!!!

437 reviews5 followers
April 18, 2018
I am so glad Maria decided to write Cadens story. I know she wasn't too sure at the begining. Along with Cadens story we also get a glimpse of what is to come with Morgan's story.

After coming out to his family Caden no longer feels suffocated. He is finally able to be himself. All Caden needs is to find his absolute. That comes in the form of Casper. However, Casper hasn't come to terms with his own sexuality.

Caden also coming out leads to scenes of heartbreak and destruction. Get the tissues ready.

We meet back up with some of the characters from Dazed, book one in the series. Tarrant is still as hot as ever.

Even though it is classed as a NA book, I would allow my 14 year old to read it. It shows you to just be true to yourself and the wait is worth it.
Profile Image for Emmbooks .
297 reviews16 followers
March 13, 2018
beautiful, heartfelt read.

full review to come closer to release day.




**beta read**
Profile Image for Sassy Southern Book Blog.
5,396 reviews274 followers
April 17, 2018
Caden Reigns is a football player and has a twin brother named Tarrant. He is finally at peace with who he is and although there are people who have issues with his sexuality, especially on the football team, he is who he wants to be.
Casper Somerville has just moved to town and he catches Caden’s eye but it is clear that Casper is at odds within himself and finds himself with many of the girls who follow the football boys around.
Will Caden wait around for Casper to figure himself out or will he move on with his own life?
This was a great book on discovering who you are and being true to yourself.
I liked Caden a lot and was impressed that he knew who he was and that he did not have an easy go at all. My heart broke when he spoke about an incident that happened to him in the past when he first came out and I hate that this type of thing still happens so much.
Casper was an interesting character as it was obvious that he wasn’t sure who he really was and was afraid to find out. That was so understandable, but I was mad when he flaunted a few girls in Caden’s face and I hated how he went off on him.
My heart just broke towards the end of the book at what happened to Caden and Aaron. There is so much evil in the world and the author really reminds of us of that fact.
The ending left us hanging with Morgan and I am crossing my fingers that the next book gives her a happy ever after. - By Rebecca
Profile Image for Ann .
1,717 reviews17 followers
September 4, 2021
I don't know where to start but I'm really loving this series and I can't really say how much I loved Caden and Casper in this book. Words fail me how they touched me. The raw emotional feelings both went through and the things so indescribable they endured is something you can feel through the words written in the book! And some things you know happen in the world today too, things you can't imagine what someone must feel! I can only say that love is love and everyone deserves someone in their life that completes them.

Caden is on the football team and has come out as gay which doesn't make it easy for him but he's got family that support him but he's not loving the game anymore like he used to do. So when Casper joins the team, he's not sure what to do with his life anymore. And even though he feels Casper is feeling the same way he is, he doesn't want to push him into something more. But life happens and you can't control everything. And when time seems to be slipping away, choices will be made. But unfortunately not everyone seems to be okay with everything going on and in the end they'll have to fight for what they truly believe in...
Profile Image for Johnaka- Amity Book Blog.
1,158 reviews16 followers
April 3, 2018
Conflicted by Maria Macdonald
“Two halves of a whole, 5 stars”

If you would have told me a year ago I would read a m/m book and like it I would have called you crazy. Well you can call me crazy. I’ve tried reading m/m in the past and was never able to fall into the story, but with Casper and Caden I was able to just like I can with a m/f story. Conflicted is tastefully done and there is no denying these two belong together. The story flew by and I felt like I had hardly started reading when it was over, but I felt good with how the story worked out.
Caden is the guy who finally busted out of the closet and into the open with his sexuality. While at it he’s also finding himself with the little help from his brother and friends. The four of them can take on anything that comes there way. Even with that said he is left feeling a little restless and knows he wants the happily ever after his brother and his best friend have. Then he meets Casper.
Casper is in the closet and doesn’t know how to come out. He’s the definition of mans man. Then when he meets Caden everything starts to change. Will he be willing to put himself on the line for love? And what will he do if those he cares about come in harm’s way?
Plot-5/5
Characters-5/5
Heat-5/5
Writing style-5/5
Overall-5/5
**SBR Review**
Profile Image for Susan Trewick.
571 reviews18 followers
April 15, 2018
I absolutely love the first book in this series, I’ve re-read it about a hundred times so I was eager to get my hands on this, it doesn’t disappoint. I’m so glad the author gave us Cadens story, in the previous book he finally comes out to his family and friends and in this book we see him blossom and bloom and truly find himself With the help of his brother and friends. Casper is still in the closet and doesn’t know how to get out, he has feelings for Caden but doesn’t really know what to do with them or how to handle them. From the first meeting you can see they are made for each other, I was fully invested in them as a couple and was rooting for them to get their happy ever after. It’s not all plain sailing for them, there’s a few bumps along the way that they have to overcome. We get to catch up with characters from the first book, they help to enhance the story and set things up nicely for the next book! While reading this book I laughed, cried, swooned and cursed, it’s full of feels that leaves you panting for more! This is another great read from this author and I can’t wait to read Morgan’s story.


*** reviewed for sweet & spicy reads-ARC provided for honest review ***
Profile Image for Rebecca Austin.
3,153 reviews3 followers
April 30, 2018
This was a great book on discovering who you are and being true to yourself.

I liked Caden a lot and was impressed that he knew who he was and that he did not have an easy go at all. My heart broke when he spoke about an incident that happened to him in the past when he first came out and I hate that this type of thing still happens so much.

Casper was an interesting character as it was obvious that he wasn’t sure who he really was and was afraid to find out. That was so understandable, but I was mad when he flaunted a few girls in Caden’s face and I hated how he went off on him.

My heart just broke towards the end of the book at what happened to Caden and Aaron. There is so much evil in the world and the author really reminds of us of that fact.

The ending left us hanging with Morgan and I am crossing my fingers that the next book gives her a happy ever after.
Profile Image for Lisa.
2,349 reviews13 followers
April 15, 2018
This is Caden's story. You really need to have read 'Dazed' first to understand and experience how he gets to this point. This is Caden being true to himself and finding someone to share his life with but Casper has yet to fully admit to who he is to himself and those around him.

A journey of self discovery set against a backdrop of bigotry and prejudice. Love over comes hate and this makes for a further powerful coming of age story from a very talented author. It is a short read but it packs a punch in terms of emotion and story.

I have discovered a new favourite author to add to my list in Maria Macdonald. She captured my heart, brought all the feels and kept me hooked through every single word.

***Reviewed for LBM Book Blog***
Profile Image for Nikki Costello ***Crazy Cajun Book Addicts Blog***.
2,079 reviews57 followers
April 16, 2018
I received a complimentary copy of this book through Crazy Cajun Book Addicts for an honest review.

This author is totally new to me and I have to seriously ask myself what took me so long!
Conflicted is a great m/m romance, it was really well written and from the moment you read the prologue it will tug at your heartstrings.

Caden has come out to his family and friends and is finally in a place where he feels comfortable in his own skin, if only everyone felt that way. Casper is the new guy on campus and there's an instant attraction between him and Caden but Casper is having difficulties coming to terms with his sexuality. Will Casper listen to his heart and take a chance on Caden before its to late.

I great read and I will definitely be reading more from Maria McDonald.
Profile Image for Nikita Parikh.
Author 1 book18 followers
May 2, 2018
Okay, let's start with the fact that the title of the book has never been as apt as this one. Oh my, what a writing. Even though this book is a novella it's packed with so much ansty, emotions, turmoil with a lick of humor and funny moments.
Caden - Can I please put him in a box and save him from everyone in the world! This guy is so precious and filled with so much empathy and understanding. God how can someone be cruel to him.
Reading this book had been an absolute delight and I would definitely recommend this book to others.
I also love the fact that the author did an amazing job of highlighting the sexual identity struggle that people face and the kind of support or lack there of is with the persons social support!
Profile Image for Teri.
3,918 reviews37 followers
June 14, 2018
I loved this story and it trying to also bring awareness to a major issue which is hate crimes against the alternative lifestyle. This is an m/m read but I was able to make it thru it because there was no sex. Sorry I know it's completely all me but well I have issues. It's a great story and while there is angst the author does a great job in addressing it. Wonderful story in this novella and yes it's a standalone and yes you need to read it so you're ready for the next book. This m/m is skillfully done so people like me who choose not to read m/m can handle this.


Love this author and this series. Can't wait for book 3. Love this authors style and her characters.
Profile Image for Donna Matthewman.
208 reviews2 followers
April 18, 2018
5* Conflicted is yet another amazing read from the talented Maria Macdonald. Since finishing Dazed I have been hooked on this group of characters and eagerly awaiting anything new from them. This is Cadens story and the only way I can describe it is heartbreakingly amazing. The roller coaster of emotions you feel whilst reading this book is unreal. Maria has you laughing one moment, sighing in awe the next and then in floods of tears. This book has it all and is the most engrossingly, absorbingly, emotionally charged read I've read so far this year, Well done Maria!
Profile Image for Hopelessly Addicted To Books .
3,624 reviews151 followers
April 3, 2018
I absolutely loved Caden in Dazed he was such a great character to read and his story only made me love him more.

This was a beautiful story about two young men falling in love whilst fighting against prejudice and homophobia. Casper was perfect for Caden, reading about their struggles as well as the acceptance by friends and family was so emotional.

The author did an amazing job with this book it was told with such sensitivity and depth of feeling that at times it brought me to tears.

Bravo Maria
Profile Image for Jeanette Oglesby.
572 reviews16 followers
April 17, 2018
This is a heartwarming, soul searching, finding your self kind of book. This is a m/m book and honestly I do not read this genre, but I loved Caden and the rest of the gang in Dazed that I had to continue. Caden and Casper's story slowly broke my heart in all that these two had to go through. I really liked their story and it looks like there is going to be another book with Morgan's story. I can't wait.

Happy Reading Everyone!!
682 reviews2 followers
June 11, 2020
I’m unsure on this one...while I did like Caden in book 1 I’m not sure on in this one. At the beginning of the book he was almost pressuring Casper to come out. Then when he was talking about Morgan to Laura he kept saying they had to give her time and not pressure her. It was a bit contracting.
Further on in the book / novella (it was very short) once the guys were together they were a good match though.
Profile Image for Beyond The Covers Blog.
2,518 reviews91 followers
April 17, 2018
Another great read by Maria Macdonald. Conflicted was a shorter story, but still packed the same greatness as all of her other books. This story draws you in, and holds onto your heart. The ending was not what I expected, but in a good way!
Profile Image for Ann (Literary Lust).
1,615 reviews25 followers
April 22, 2018
After reading Dazed and absolutely loving it I hoped that I would enjoy this book too. I did. I loved it!! I love the characters in this series and this book focuses on Caden's story which was a really emotional read. I would totally recommend this book and cannot wait for more of this series.
Profile Image for Sue Fleming.
105 reviews
June 23, 2018
The second book in this series focuses on Cayden, Tarrents brother and his coming to grips at coming out. Will be find true love like his brother? Or will he be ostracized forever? Book 3 can't come soon enough.
Profile Image for JJ Button.
43 reviews
January 1, 2022
Read it, loved it, laughed with it and cried because of it! This book truly was an emotional roller coaster and one of my favourites of Maria's! It introduced new characters such as the loveable Solomon.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Emma White.
252 reviews6 followers
February 19, 2018
Fantastic read.
Raw love that some feel is unnatural.
who is to say what is right and wrong in love
Profile Image for Ashley .
1,150 reviews4 followers
April 17, 2018
A great steamy read by Macdonald! Loved the characters and the way their romance developed.

I received a copy of this book and am voluntarily reviewing.
Profile Image for Kim Sutton.
597 reviews11 followers
April 17, 2018
After reading Dazed I couldn't wait for more. This one didn't get me quite as excited but I think that's because it was M/M, and I don't usually read that. I love Caden and in Conflicted we finally see the real him. Not the bravado he puts on for show.

I am loving this authors work she's soon becoming a new favourite of mine. I can't wait for more from this series. Four stars!
Profile Image for Tracy W (Tracy&HelensRomanceBlog).
298 reviews58 followers
April 17, 2018
My heart is so full right now....

This story is WOW yeah unbelievably heartwarmingly beautiful....I have so many feels right now...from the very beginning when reading the prologue, you are completely pulled into this story, and it doesn’t let you go....

Caden and Casper are so completely made for each, you can see from the very first meeting, this author has produced characters that you honestly feel like you are there right along with them, going through every emotion they do...from the first meeting to right to the very end, you are rooting for these 2 characters to be together...

The book honestly has you feel so many emotions while reading it, from smiling, to crying, to complete and utter shock....you felt it all. I can honestly say this book deserves 5 ⭐️ if not so much more....you can not help but fall completely in love with the whole story. Absolutely amazing and undoubtedly a brilliant author.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 34 reviews

Can't find what you're looking for?

Get help and learn more about the design.