I Signed Up To Be The Substitute Familiar Of A Struggling Witch To Pay My Bills And I'm Just Now Realizing What I Got Myself Into

by Alex Zandra Van Chestein

Becoming a witch takes a lot of hard work, and not everyone has the resources to devote themselves to such a grueling process. But thankfully, magic isn’t completely unattainable! Witches need familiars in order to thrive, and sometimes the best candidate for the job is in the neighborhood instead of through a portal to the otherworld.

But what happens when you try on a new life and realize it fits you better than your old one? What do you do when it comes with an expiration date?

Substitute Familiar is the most worldbuilding-heavy light novel I’ve written yet, depicting a modern world with magic, demons, and folks trying to make it work. It’s about getting the chance to try something you’ve wanted to do for a long time, and all the unforeseen consequences that come with it. It also has a lot of self-actualization, girls kissing girls, and gender feels, because that’s what I do!

Please enjoy, and let’s keep making wonderful things together.

(This is a light novel of around 34k words with 11 interior black & white illustrations.)

Genres: Fantasy

Kindle Edition

Published April 4, 2018

Reviews

[Courtney Lanning · Rating 4 out of 5]

Oi, for what I figured to be a cute, sweet read, I sure got my feels pummeled.

Yes, it was cute and sweet. But I was so stressed through Em figuring out what she wanted and whether Penelope was going to strip her of everything she'd come to love about herself.

I'm not sure how I feel about the romance yet. The poly aspect was a welcome surprise, but the romance as a whole. . . I dunno yet. Part of me wonders if the story would have been stronger without it.

Esmerelda was definitely my favorite character, though. I loved her.

Great read. I'll definitely be picking up the sequel bundle of short stories.

[Ada]

What ​self-actualization? What gender feels​? This is absolutely 100% definitely not a wonderful trans story at all. Why was I so emotionally caught up in the story then? Why did I feel all the feels? What do you mean, I found the protagonist so relatable, from the name stuff and not caring about self stuff at the beginning to the fear and uncertainty of transition at the end? Wait, I'm transgender too, there has to be a connection here. :D

[DJay · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a fun read about learning who you really are as well as the struggles of trying to achieve your goals. A short but sweet book.

[Daniela · Rating 1 out of 5]

In many ways, I just really wasn't the audience for this book. It's a very sweet, low-stakes kind of story where even when the characters are worried about things going wrong, the reader knows that nothing bad is going to happen, not even for a moment. For example, the biggest source of potential conflict in this novella is probably the fear of what would happen when Amanda finds out the truth about Em/the lie about what happened with her summoning, but when the truth does come out, there's no real sense of betrayal or hurt from Amanda. I can see where the appeal of that sort of storytelling comes from, particularly when it comes to stories dealing with queer characters, but it's nonetheless a bit too fluffy for me.

I enjoyed the worldbuilding that we got about how enchantments worked in this setting, and was somewhat disappointed when the focus of the story shifted away from that. (On a more shallow note, I really want that hairbrush they crafted.) I also really liked what it did with the concept of "true names" and how that intersects with magic and trans identities. It was very nicely done and probably my favorite aspect of the story.

The author definitely has an epithet problem. There was one section where their use of epithets kind of worked for me—near the beginning, when Em is carefully not thinking about her decision to allow Amanda to refer to her by a female name/pronouns. It was still a bit clunky, but I could see what the author was trying to do there and appreciated it. Unfortunately, I can’t say the same about the use of epithets in the rest of the novel, with the following line being the most egregious example:

“…Hi!” the green-haired flustered friend replied.

The writing wasn't always that awkward, but overall I found the clunky use of epithets jarring in a way that frequently threw me out of the story.

I also didn't expect this story to be as furry-adjacent as it ended up being? Which, YKINMKATO, but it's not my thing. There was also some under-negotiated poly, the handling of which made me feel fairly uncomfortable. Basically, Amanda and Em kiss and confess their feelings. Soon after, Em also kisses/accepts a relationship with Esmeralda. Esmeralda knows about Em's relationship with Amanda, but although the epilogue shows Amanda later being fine with Em and Esmeralda's relationship, there's no indication that she's aware of there being any romantic connection between them at the time the first E/E kiss actually occurs. I knew there would be no negative consequences, because, again, this is just not that kind of story, but the way it was set up made it feel more like cheating rather than the kind of healthy poly/open relationship that I know the book was actually trying to convey.

In short: a fairly sweet story, but ultimately one that wasn't for me.

[John Yewell · Rating 5 out of 5]

It’s perfect the way it is.

I just love these gentle little stories, with their gentle little pictures. No Mono-Mythical Hero, no Saving The World, only a bit of Eldritch Powers From Beyond Our World, just regular (if very irregular) folks helping each other solve little (if still very important) problems. The ‘gender feels’ are nice too; I’m pretty content with mine but I get it’s an issue for some folks and they could use support from friends they make along the way.

[Max · Rating 4 out of 5]

Well, that was just really heartwarming and sweet. Even in a "fluffy" story like this, I have to say, it makes a big difference when a trans author is writing about trans experiences, as a lot of it resonated. (In a story about a person turned into a little Pokemon creature!) It was a quick, sweet read with a charming romance (actually, more than one?!) and I'm glad I read it.

[Elena Abbott · Rating 5 out of 5]

​An absolutely fun and adorable read that just kept getting better and better the longer it went on. I'm so glad I found it in my collection. Short and sweet, easy to read in a couple of hours. I love Em and Amanda and all the other characters. And the gender feels just about made me swoon. All around excellent little book. And really cute artwork too.

[Sarah · Rating 5 out of 5]

Funny

A funny book to read lot's of nice charge in the plot lines to keep you interested hope you enjoy as much as I did

[Issy Waldrom · Rating 5 out of 5]

Cute and adorable and a lot of fun to read, and I really do adore familiar stories. It was nice to see the main character grow and realise not only who they were, but also what they wanted from life.

[Lilith · Rating 5 out of 5]

I can't strictly say that *this* is what cracked my egg, but it certainly shattered what was left it. And not just in the trans way; it quite definitely helped form the foundations of my identity and personality that I was trying to build and it would take me four and a half years just to figure out exactly what I was feeling when I was reading this.

A familiar, bound to a specific person - but not exclusively. Powerful in her own right, unique. Special. Emilynn's journey from beginning all the way to end is one not just deeply relatable, but one I feel I see so much of myself in, too. To go from wholly reliant on someone, anxious, scared - to competent and confident and loving - it's eerily reminiscent of my life since I've read this, now that I'm reflecting back on it.

I just hope I can spread as much love and magic.