Expressionate

Expressions #1

by Lucy Smoke

"My stepmother shattered me. My ex ruined me. One look at Tax and I knew he would kill me." Love Love. It's a name given to people that you care about. And it was a name given to a little girl that no one cared about. The irony is not lost on me. I've always been a bit separate. First in my family and then in my relationships. Maybe you have to understand the emotion to feel it. I've never understood how people will lie, cheat, steal, and murder for it. Why some people hand it over like pennies in their pockets. Or others hoard it like it's their only valuable possession. I don't do either. I'm convinced I don't have any love to give. Someone is going to have to breathe life into my damaged soul before I can ever even consider loving them. Tax I'm a shit storm just waiting to happen. Actually, scratch that, I usually don't wait for anything or anybody. The only things I give a fuck about are my boys--my band--and my little sister, Ally. I've gone from underground kid fighter I was to whatever the hell I am now--guardian, bandmate, neighbor to a fucking woman that messes with my head. I want to know her secrets, her pains, and everything dark inside of her and whether or not her darkness matches my own.

Genres: Contemporary Romance, Dark, Music

394 pages, Kindle Edition

First published July 15, 2018

About the author

Lucy Smoke, also known as Lucinda Dark for her fantasy works, has a master’s degree in English and is a self-proclaimed creative chihuahua. She enjoys feeding her wanderlust, cover addiction, as well as her face, and truly hopes people will stop giving her bath bombs as gifts. Bath’s get cold too fast and it’s just not as wonderful as the commercials make it out to be when the tub isn’t a jacuzzi.

When she’s not on a never-ending quest to find the perfect milkshake, she lives and works in the southern United States with her beloved fur-baby, Hiro, and her family and friends.


Reviews

[Erin · Rating 5 out of 5]

Phenomenal Story!

WOW! This book is freaking intense and broke my heart over and over again. It was a rollercoaster ride of explosive emotions. Tax and Love's story is dark, twisted, raw and very gritty. Be ready to delve into a gut wrenching ride of epic proportions.

Tax and Love are phenomenal characters with very dark and twisted pasts. It's their pasts that made them who they are with their hate, anger and insecurities. Right from the first time Tax and Love met they were drawn to each other by some invisible force. They have amazing chemistry and are perfect together even with all of their imperfections. But their relationship is not an easy one and their story at times is completely gut wrenching but beautiful in its own dark and twisted way.

I loved the story and the characters. It definitely kept me on the edge of my seat, enthralled and highly captivated by Tax and Love's passion and determination. Highly recommend.

[SJ · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a story about Love and Tax, both are very damaged but trying to survive life. They both have secrets and scars buried deep inside them which they each carry within their souls

The story is emotionally charged and I felt the whole range of emotions with them, it gave me a major case of the feels. A real story full of hard times and angst and I absolutely loved it, I found it gripping and a real page turner and highly recommend this read

[Rhiannon Chillingworth · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow. This book really got to me. Tax and Love had amazing chemistry and I loved them together. But this book was completely heart wrenching and the note from the author at the end just makes the whole thing more meaningful for me.

This is a book about two very messed up people who fins their way to each other. That is pretty much the story, but the characters felt real and I was completely absorbed.

This book deals with very dark themes and I thought the wrytwr dealt with them very sensitively and effectively, clearly (as mentioned at the end) based on her own experiences.

There is nothing massively original in the storyline, and it may toe the line of cheesy every now and again, but this book deeply affected my emotions and will leave a lingering impression.

[♡ Jeri's Book Attic ♡ Jeri the Romance Bibiliophile ♡ · Rating 3 out of 5]

[Anna · Rating 5 out of 5]

I don't even know where to begin with this book. When one of my favorite RH authors announced she was working on a non RH, I was like ok, we will see how it is. Never did I imagine the words that would flow onto the pages of this book. It is amazing! Love and Tax are my favorite. Both badly damaged individuals, just trying to survive. Both carrying secrets they would rather nobody ever know. The depth of emotions that Lucy pulls out of you in this is incredible. You experience all the heartache and pain they go through. You feel their fight, their struggles. Talk about pulling for the dark horse. You want them to pull out ahead and win at not just love but life. No matter what they have been through in their past, no matter what other people think of them along their journey, you can't help but open your heart and love them exactly as they are. Their pasts do not define them but made them into the amazing people they turn out to be.
This book is not going to be for the easily offended b/c there are some things that happen in their pasts that are hard to swallow. It is so worth the read though. Lucy did an amazing job with this one. One of my favorite books this year. I can't wait to see what we get with the other characters in the future.

[Twinsie Talk Angie J · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5 rounded up
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Expressionate (Expressions #1) by Lucy Smoke
I received this book from the author for an honest review.
My friend Mary said the author was looking for a few people to review this book. I said ok sign me up and BOOM I have Tex and Love on my kindle.
The book…gesh…..I mean wowzers.
These peps …..they are alllll kinds of messed up….damaged…destroyed….ruined??? I mean its bad news bears time.
This book is extremely emotional. The characters are unbelievably realistic. They are totally relatable.
This book is dark guys. It deals with a lot of trigger type stuff so please go in warned and ready to SEE what happened to these people. The tears that flowed were epic because how can you not cry????
I can’t even begin to get into this book because if this is the “type” of book you CRAVE, it will be ruined by details. But trust me that the story between the 2 characters is amazing and something that will sit with you for a long time.

[Anna · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book felt different from what I expected from the author. I mean, I'm familiar enough with her work to have known it would be addictive and good. But Expressionate was darker, more emotional and in depth than the author's previous work. It also felt more important than anything she wrote before, like it mattered more.
I cannot exactly say that I liked it, because the word does not seem right enough for how it made me feel, but it was definitely impactful. The characters all had their fair share of demons, that were not quite in the past (and not just the main ones) and they were all surprisingly easy to relate to.
The author also got me invested no only in the main story, but in the lives of the side characters as well, who I'm insanely curious about and desperately want to get to know better.
I'm will definitely, without a doubt, reading any follow ups for this story that may come out. Plus, there were some loose ends that I really need to investigate on and I hope it will all be revealed in the future.
This book was amazing.

[Alli · Rating 5 out of 5]

Utterly, painfully beautiful.

This book captivated me from start to finish. Love & Tax's story will just grab you heart and soul and demand your attention. It is certainly an emotional ride, but well worth every second. The pain in both of their pasts may bring them together, but it also tries to tear them apart. It's like a car wreck you don't want to see, but can't look away -- you know it's going to be hard to read, but you have to see what beauty comes from all this pain. The book does have a "happy for now" ending and there is good that comes from the bad. Well worth the read!!!



Quick & Dirty Details:
- Contemporary, Male/Female Romance, Angsty (somewhat dark)
- Love - 21 yrs writer
- Tax - 23 yrs musician, fighter
- Steamy
- Multi-POV
- Can be read as a standalone
- Triggers

[Margaux Espinosa · Rating 5 out of 5]

Holy f*cking WOW!!! That was incredible! This is one seriously incredible, intense, emotion filled read! I’m in serious awe right now. I absolutely loved this book, the characters, holy sh*t, the characters are amazing. They are easy to relate to, 100% believable, and I fell head over heels in love with Love and Tax. Both of their stories/backgrounds are heartbreaking, and they absolutely belong together. I seriously hope that there are stories for the other characters in this book, because every single one of them are amazing. The writing, work, emotion, detail and just everything that Lucy Smoke put into this book is amazing. I can’t wait to read more of her works. I absolutely, without a doubt, 100% recommend this read for anyone looking to read a contemporary romance with heart, emotion, and fantastic characters. This was beautiful.

[Jocelyn LeDonne · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow that was intense! This is also relatable on so many levels. It deals with emotional and physical abuse, depression, suicide and some other things. If you are easily triggered this book may not be for you . But if you like stories with a darker theme the this story is phenomenal! In this story we follow Love and Tax as they journey to overcome their pasts and work towards the future and their love for each other. Beautifully written with an amazing storyline! I love the dynamic between Love and Tax and how they are with each other opposed to without each other. I would love to read side stories on some of the other characters like Cross, Blake, Trisha and Ally. Love's tattoo sound fricking amazing too! I absolutely loved this story!

[Rebecca ellis · Rating 5 out of 5]

All the feels.

Let me tell you a story...
A few days ago I was creepin' in some reader groups on facebook, and I came across this book being recommended. The lovely Lucy Smoke was talking about all the tears from her readers that she has collected from this book (I'm paraphrasing...) and I thought to myself "Challenge accepted."

Challenge failed. Yeah. I failed hard, too. I cried. I'm not ashamed to admit it. Now Lucy Smoke can add my tears to her collection.
Anyways, this was a powerful book. For some reason, Trisha is sticking with me more than I thought she would. But all the characters, especially Love and Tax, will stick with me for a while.
This author has a power over words that I don't come across too often.
Read it. You won't regret it.

[Jean Bachen · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book blew me away and left me at a loss for words. It got under my skin and will be with me for a long time. It’s a dark read, with some triggers in it. If non-consensual sex and suicide bother you then you should skip it. But if you like stories where a pair of main characters who live in the dark manage to find light in each other, then you will want to read this book. Love and Tax have super explosive chemistry, and their flaws and darkness are so well written, that their story will dig into you and refuse to let go. Their pasts are so haunting, and you cannot help but root for them to be happy in their futures. This one is going to be with me for a long time.

[Ivy Wilson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Can’t even express how good... wow

I’m just taken aback. I’m shook. I was sucked in the moment I started reading about these two broken souls who come together to make each other whole. Love and Tax... so beautifully broken yet perfect for each other. Fire and ice. It was electrifying, heartbreaking, pulse thumping and more. Wow... I highly recommend to anyone looking for a story that will pull you in and never let go until the last word of the book.

All I can say is thank you to the author for such a beautifully written story. Seriously. Wow.

[Megan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ok so I went into this book not expecting to fall head over heels...but holy heck I couldn't put it down! The story that Smoke has woven is beyond spectacular and Expressionate is her best work yet! The story of Love and Tax is profound and so in depth that you won't know where you atart and the story ends. Be warned this book isn't for the lighthearted but if you love deep, soul wrenching and gorgeously engrossing then this is the book for you.

[Kim Latham · Rating 5 out of 5]

Emotionally crippling

This is one of those books that you have to read. It's an emotional roller coaster that pulls at my heart. I cried so much while reading this book. It hits too close to home on some things. The characters come to life in a story filled with sadness and pain and lead to trust and love that surpass it all.
Be warned you should have a comfortable blanket and a box of tissues at the ready while reading this book

[Desireé La · Rating 5 out of 5]

When healing hurts. This was phenomenal! I love the characters and their stories. This resonated with the darkness that I'm sure we all experience, but there was also enough light and hope to restore faith in better days. The author's writing enthralled me- I was crying as I read, was filled with empathy, and boiling with rage too. This was real.

[Kimberly Sullivan · Rating 5 out of 5]

WOW

This book totally blew me away. The emotions in this book were so raw and real it made you feel you were going through them with the characters. It is a must read!!!

[Loki · Rating 4 out of 5]

Heart-wrenchingly Good

I didn’t know what to expect from this book, but I picked it up because I was in the mood for a rock music romance. That’s not what I got, but at the same time, I loved it. Love and Tax are broken. Their parents messed them up as only parents can do, and I have to say, Love’s father was as much to blame for where his daughter ended up as her step-mother.
Sex: the sex is painful, disturbing, and hot, as These emotionally raw books tend to be.
Plot: I would call this almost a Cinderella retelling. You have the wicked stepmother, the broken girl, but in the one Prince Charming is as broken and messed up as Cinderella. They both have great inner strength to push through everything they have gone through and keep going. There were lots of plot holes that needed to be filled or rounded out, but it was still a great read. I suspect how Blake knew Love’s history as he was the flashback that caught my attention with the broken vodka bottle, but while hinted at in a disjointed way, it’s never confirmed or finalised. I’m hoping to get that if Blake’s story is ever written. I worked out early on how Danny came to be in Love’s life, and it sickened me, so I did want to see the person who instigated all of that get her world torn apart as payback. I’m thinking that might happen with Cross’s story, but it left me unsatisfied that Love was left without that closure and comeuppance.
World: it’s set in the modern day, in the south of the US. Not sure where as I’m not knowledgeable of the smaller US towns, but it sounded like it would be around Georgia area.
Recommend: You have to have a certain penchant for darkness to read these kinds of stories. To understand and empathise with the broken souls wandering the earth. If you are one of these, then yes, I highly recommend this book. If you are not, then this will churn your stomach and you’ll probably never connect with the protagonist, so you should try something else. Frankly, I totally got it, and wanted to rip my heart out for Love and tear her enemy to pieces.

[Jade Adams · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a lovely book to read! Easy read that gives you all sorts of feelings. You can tell just how much emotion and time has gone into writing this and as a reader, that really makes it that much better.

Tax and Love have very similar backgrounds, their parents didn't give a hoot about them, although the were both handed this is different ways. Love's step mom was a real piece of work, Love was made to do everything and anything whilst her step sister did nothing (although this isn't her fault and she still loved Love.) As soon as she could she got out of that hell hole but found herself in a new one that wasn't any better. Tax was made to fight for his family, he was told that it was to help them and he would do anything to protect his little sister. As soon as he could he got out, but he returned for his sister and took care of her when she needed him most.

When Tax and Love meet you feel the chemistry straight away and it was truly something! But relationships aren't easy and this one is no exception. A must read for sure!

[Ashley · Rating 5 out of 5]

Deeply emotional

This was a deeply emotional story. Tax and Love tugged at my heart. I felt so bad for all that they had endured but I do feel like their story needed to be told. These concepts need to be brought to the light, depression and thoughts of suicide. It needs to be talked about. Love was such a strong character. She went through some unimaginable hard times and lost her way a bit. Tax was so willing to help her while also fighting his own demons. These two characters just fix together. I really enjoyed this book. Tax and Love's story was heartbreaking but beautiful. It was very well written with almost a poetic quality. It reminded me of music they way the story flowed. It is deep and sometimes hard to read with quite a few triggers but I am so glad I took a chance on these characters because they really touched my heart.

[Tiffany_queen_of_books · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love and Tax are an amazing couple. Love is over coming for past. Tax is raising his young sister. Tax knows right away that he wants Love. Love try’s to pull away, but Tax won’t let her. Tax is an absolutely perfect book boyfriend. He is extremely supportive to anything and everything Love does. These 2 complete each other. Love has a past she coping with. Tax is everything. Their chemistry is fire, their banter is amazing. Absolutely loved this book.

[Book Addict · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is truely great book by the talented Lucy Smoke and it absolutely captivates the readers attention all the way through. Love and Tax are very intriguing characters and they have both gone through a lot of difficulties that draw each other together! This is a compelling story full of emotion and heartache that is highly recommended.

[BabyLuV · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved it

I really enjoyed the book, the ups and downs and everything in between. I also have to say that I liked it because my mothers real name is LuV and my real name is Baby LuV, I know are names are different but I (LuV) them just the same. This was a book I could see me re-reading again that is for sure.

[Penny · Rating 4 out of 5]

This story between Love and Tax is one of the darkness that resides in people and the broken pieces of themselves that they hide away from the world. Lucy Smoke has written an beautiful story of how the darkness and broken pieces can sometimes be too much but with the right people and being shown you are worthy no matter what you had to endure to survive you are worth that love and more.

The feelings and raw emotions are breathtaking and this story is definitely one I won’t forget anytime soon.

[Jazmin · Rating 5 out of 5]

My poor heart

My poor little heart cant handle these types of stories. I feel like this love story brung me in and kept me there through the ups and downs. What Love did towards the end broke me and I felt Taxs' pain. I felt like I was in the relationship with them and happy that they got the ending that they deserved

[Joy Whiteside · Rating 5 out of 5]

OMG, this was an awesome read. I could not put it down and finished it in one sitting. It moves along at an amazing pace, the characters are so real that you feel as though you are there with them and the story. It will grab you and not let you go until you finish the very last word. This is such an awesome read that it needs to be on your TBR list, no doubt about it.

[Ash · Rating 3 out of 5]

Broken people healing one another

Contemporary. Darkish. Romance. Duel POV. Childhood abuse shapes too people. They try to find themselves and each other. Nice dark contemporary read.

[Angela · Rating 5 out of 5]

Powerful

This is a beautiful, haunting, sexy, heart-wrenching story about two damaged souls who find solace together. It delivers a powerful message and will hit you right in the feels!

[Samantha · Rating 5 out of 5]

I don’t normally read non-RH, but I was sucked into this story so quickly and it was over before I even realized! Love and Tax are so beautifully broken. I immediately fell in love with their story. Their faults, their strengths, their REALness. Buy it, read it, love it.

[Heather Morrill · Rating 5 out of 5]

Oh my goodness

Holy freaking....wow just wow! This story is heart breaking and gut wrenching and makes you feel all the feels even ones you didn't know about I can't tell you how many times I cried during this book