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California Diaries #5
Ducky: Diary One
Ducky’s old buddies have changed, leaving him feeling alone . . . Maybe he doesn’t need guy friends anyway
Sophomore Christopher McCrae has been called “Ducky” for as long as he can remember. It wasn’t his choice, but it fits because it’s weird and funny, just like him. Ducky’s nickname has not changed, but other things have: His best friend, Jay, has started hanging with the Cro Mags—the kind of guys who spend their energy picking on guys like Ducky—and his other friend Alex is always spaced out and moody.
Hanging out with his new friends Dawn, Sunny, Maggie, and Amalia has been cool, but he misses the connection to his guy friends. His parents are in Ghana for a year, and have left him alone with his older brother, Ted, who is gone most of the time. When Jay throws a party and invites Ducky and Alex, Ducky thinks things might be turning around. But when the night takes an unexpected turn, Ducky realizes it’s not so easy to reconnect with his old friends.
This ebook features an illustrated personal history of Ann M. Martin, including rare images from the author’s collection.
Sophomore Christopher McCrae has been called “Ducky” for as long as he can remember. It wasn’t his choice, but it fits because it’s weird and funny, just like him. Ducky’s nickname has not changed, but other things have: His best friend, Jay, has started hanging with the Cro Mags—the kind of guys who spend their energy picking on guys like Ducky—and his other friend Alex is always spaced out and moody.
Hanging out with his new friends Dawn, Sunny, Maggie, and Amalia has been cool, but he misses the connection to his guy friends. His parents are in Ghana for a year, and have left him alone with his older brother, Ted, who is gone most of the time. When Jay throws a party and invites Ducky and Alex, Ducky thinks things might be turning around. But when the night takes an unexpected turn, Ducky realizes it’s not so easy to reconnect with his old friends.
This ebook features an illustrated personal history of Ann M. Martin, including rare images from the author’s collection.
120 pages, Kindle Edition
First published February 1, 1998
25 people are currently reading
234 people want to read
About the author
Ann M. Martin
1,098 books3,047 followersAnn Matthews Martin was born on August 12, 1955. She grew up in Princeton, New Jersey, with her parents and her younger sister, Jane. After graduating from Smith College, Ann became a teacher and then an editor of children's books. She's now a full-time writer.
Ann gets the ideas for her books from many different places. Some are based on personal experiences, while others are based on childhood memories and feelings. Many are written about contemporary problems or events. All of Ann's characters, even the members of the Baby-sitters Club, are made up. But many of her characters are based on real people. Sometimes Ann names her characters after people she knows, and other times she simply chooses names that she likes.
Ann has always enjoyed writing. Even before she was old enough to write, she would dictate stories to her mother to write down for her. Some of her favorite authors at that time were Lewis Carroll, P. L. Travers, Hugh Lofting, Astrid Lindgren, and Roald Dahl. They inspired her to become a writer herself.
Since ending the BSC series in 2000, Ann’s writing has concentrated on single novels, many of which are set in the 1960s.
After living in New York City for many years, Ann moved to the Hudson Valley in upstate New York where she now lives with her dog, Sadie, and her cats, Gussie, Willy and Woody. Her hobbies are reading, sewing, and needlework. Her favorite thing to do is to make clothes for children.
http://us.macmillan.com/author/annmma...
Ann gets the ideas for her books from many different places. Some are based on personal experiences, while others are based on childhood memories and feelings. Many are written about contemporary problems or events. All of Ann's characters, even the members of the Baby-sitters Club, are made up. But many of her characters are based on real people. Sometimes Ann names her characters after people she knows, and other times she simply chooses names that she likes.
Ann has always enjoyed writing. Even before she was old enough to write, she would dictate stories to her mother to write down for her. Some of her favorite authors at that time were Lewis Carroll, P. L. Travers, Hugh Lofting, Astrid Lindgren, and Roald Dahl. They inspired her to become a writer herself.
Since ending the BSC series in 2000, Ann’s writing has concentrated on single novels, many of which are set in the 1960s.
After living in New York City for many years, Ann moved to the Hudson Valley in upstate New York where she now lives with her dog, Sadie, and her cats, Gussie, Willy and Woody. Her hobbies are reading, sewing, and needlework. Her favorite thing to do is to make clothes for children.
http://us.macmillan.com/author/annmma...
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 33 reviews
January 20, 2018
I just said in my last California Diaries review that Amalia’s story was the most disturbing and adult of the five main characters, but maybe it’s Ducky’s.
The first time I read this series (and, in all fairness, I read the other girls’ books far more than I ever read Ducky’s installments), I saw Ducky just as everyone else saw him—a carefree cool dude with a depressed best friend. Upon rereading it, I don’t know how I ever missed how unhappy Ducky was, and how uncertain of himself he always feels. His confident, charismatic behavior is a façade, or maybe just a default way of being, that in many ways makes it harder for him to reveal his unhappiness to those around him. And it’s so rare that I see that in books, but it’s a pervasive problem that applies to a lot of people I know—when everyone else sees you as put-together and on top of your game, how can you admit (even to yourself) that that person isn’t the reality? Especially when you’d rather BE that person instead of your own insecure self.
Needless to say, I love Ducky, and I liked his installment way more as an adult than I ever did as a young reader. The way it handles Ducky’s insecurity and his reaction to his best friend’s depression is spot-on, and his mental panic and guilt are fantastic. Also, it’s one of the rare books where the second-person narration style actually works, to the point where you don’t even notice it. And by making Ducky a sophomore, his narrative voice actually comes the closest to matching his stated age (unlike the girls, who are all a ridiculously unbelievable thirteen).
It seems that up to this point the California Diaries have become increasingly edgy. Dawn’s story felt largely trivial but also had some underage drinking and edginess, Sunny’s mom is dying and she runs away from home, Maggie struggles with anxiety and a nervous breakdown, Amalia has an abusive boyfriend, and now Ducky has a depressed, suicidal best friend and secretly feels pretty unhappy himself. This is not an uplifting book, but it is dark in a way that feels earned rather than forced, and I respect it a lot. One thing’s for sure: we are no longer near Baby-sitters Club territory (as if that weren’t clear from the first few pages of Dawn, Diary 1).
3.25 stars.
The first time I read this series (and, in all fairness, I read the other girls’ books far more than I ever read Ducky’s installments), I saw Ducky just as everyone else saw him—a carefree cool dude with a depressed best friend. Upon rereading it, I don’t know how I ever missed how unhappy Ducky was, and how uncertain of himself he always feels. His confident, charismatic behavior is a façade, or maybe just a default way of being, that in many ways makes it harder for him to reveal his unhappiness to those around him. And it’s so rare that I see that in books, but it’s a pervasive problem that applies to a lot of people I know—when everyone else sees you as put-together and on top of your game, how can you admit (even to yourself) that that person isn’t the reality? Especially when you’d rather BE that person instead of your own insecure self.
Needless to say, I love Ducky, and I liked his installment way more as an adult than I ever did as a young reader. The way it handles Ducky’s insecurity and his reaction to his best friend’s depression is spot-on, and his mental panic and guilt are fantastic. Also, it’s one of the rare books where the second-person narration style actually works, to the point where you don’t even notice it. And by making Ducky a sophomore, his narrative voice actually comes the closest to matching his stated age (unlike the girls, who are all a ridiculously unbelievable thirteen).
It seems that up to this point the California Diaries have become increasingly edgy. Dawn’s story felt largely trivial but also had some underage drinking and edginess, Sunny’s mom is dying and she runs away from home, Maggie struggles with anxiety and a nervous breakdown, Amalia has an abusive boyfriend, and now Ducky has a depressed, suicidal best friend and secretly feels pretty unhappy himself. This is not an uplifting book, but it is dark in a way that feels earned rather than forced, and I respect it a lot. One thing’s for sure: we are no longer near Baby-sitters Club territory (as if that weren’t clear from the first few pages of Dawn, Diary 1).
3.25 stars.
June 16, 2018
I’m re-reading this series in my 30’s and I am shocked at all the things that went over my head when I read it for the first time as a tween. Especially with Ducky. This is some serious shit and I love it.
March 29, 2024
Ducky!
This is an incredibly important book that no one who needed it ever read. I asked my gay friend who spent his childhood mainlining his sister's Babysitters' Club books if he had ever heard of this and he said no.
Ducky is struggling with his sexuality and he can't even say so because this is a late '90s Babysitters' Club spin-off and Ann M. Martin didn't want that fight with Scholastic. She wasn't out yet. Ducky isn't out. He might not even know that there's an out to be. He's got other problems. His parents are off in Ghana so he's living with his older brother and the house is trashed. The guys at school, the Cro Mags, some of them used to be his friends in elementary school, then they were assholes and he learned to avoid them, now maybe everyone's maturing a little bit and some of them are okay. One useless ex-best friend, Jay, keeps trying to set him up with babes. His other ex-best friend is profoundly depressed and can barely make a facial expression. Ducky has new friends, 13-year-old girls who want him to drive them everywhere. He's closer to Sunny that anyone, but Sunny's got terrible things going on, her mom has cancer, and Ducky has no idea how to handle that. He invites Sunny and Alex to the beach because they're both miserable, but it goes horribly. Like Ducky's sexuality, the awful thing at the end could have been more overt if this weren't a Babysitters' Club spin-off, but Ducky is miserable now too. More so. It gets better, but not yet, Ducky.
This is an incredibly important book that no one who needed it ever read. I asked my gay friend who spent his childhood mainlining his sister's Babysitters' Club books if he had ever heard of this and he said no.
Ducky is struggling with his sexuality and he can't even say so because this is a late '90s Babysitters' Club spin-off and Ann M. Martin didn't want that fight with Scholastic. She wasn't out yet. Ducky isn't out. He might not even know that there's an out to be. He's got other problems. His parents are off in Ghana so he's living with his older brother and the house is trashed. The guys at school, the Cro Mags, some of them used to be his friends in elementary school, then they were assholes and he learned to avoid them, now maybe everyone's maturing a little bit and some of them are okay. One useless ex-best friend, Jay, keeps trying to set him up with babes. His other ex-best friend is profoundly depressed and can barely make a facial expression. Ducky has new friends, 13-year-old girls who want him to drive them everywhere. He's closer to Sunny that anyone, but Sunny's got terrible things going on, her mom has cancer, and Ducky has no idea how to handle that. He invites Sunny and Alex to the beach because they're both miserable, but it goes horribly. Like Ducky's sexuality, the awful thing at the end could have been more overt if this weren't a Babysitters' Club spin-off, but Ducky is miserable now too. More so. It gets better, but not yet, Ducky.
December 14, 2021
I need to read the next book, at the end when Alex didn't answer if he tried to kill himself made me almost angry. And at the very end when he stopped stalking alex and sat there questioning himself. Then it ended.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
April 10, 2019
Ohkay! This was a quick read.
First of all, this book is written in a first-person perspective as should be clear from the title itself. The story is literally written in the form of a diary which is filled every day by the main Protagonist named 'Ducky'.
The story is a very general one presented in a very humorous way. As the story develops the tone also changes from a very light-hearted one to a very sombre one. Overall I liked this book, the main characters were great, the character development was on point, and the style of writing was also very okayish.
The only thing I didn't like was that the Font used was not very easy to read and also the page number was missing from the pages.
First of all, this book is written in a first-person perspective as should be clear from the title itself. The story is literally written in the form of a diary which is filled every day by the main Protagonist named 'Ducky'.
The story is a very general one presented in a very humorous way. As the story develops the tone also changes from a very light-hearted one to a very sombre one. Overall I liked this book, the main characters were great, the character development was on point, and the style of writing was also very okayish.
The only thing I didn't like was that the Font used was not very easy to read and also the page number was missing from the pages.
Read
March 14, 2020I’m reading from an old library copy my hometown got rid of. It’s the very book I read, the first time I discovered this series. Everything seems perfect as I reread this series. Yes, there’s melodrama. Yes, there’s stuff that seems far fetched. But this is the first book of the series where every single thing is plausible. Maybe it’s the difference in age of Ducky vs. the eighth graders. The high school setting, one saturated in experience, gives the whole book a different vibe. And of course, I heavily connect with Ducky, as a character.
Peter Lerangis, the ghostwriter of 2/3 of the Ducky books, has alluded to the fact that Ducky is gay. Of children’s books, especially written back then, had no business being upfront about those things. It’s all in between the lines. And boy, does it hit me even harder as I’ve aged. My 22 year old self has picked up on much more than my elementary aged self did. As a kid, Ducky and Sunny resonated with me. Now, as a twenty-something, I can understand how difficult Sunny is, but I appreciate Ducky more and more.
I’m sad Lerangis was not able to write the last of the series. His writing is so natural, so fitting. I took a long break before starting this book of the series because I knew it was a lot to digest. The previous six of the series had a lot going on in terms of drama, but this installment hit home in a way that I had to prepare myself for, even after countless previous reads.
Peter Lerangis, the ghostwriter of 2/3 of the Ducky books, has alluded to the fact that Ducky is gay. Of children’s books, especially written back then, had no business being upfront about those things. It’s all in between the lines. And boy, does it hit me even harder as I’ve aged. My 22 year old self has picked up on much more than my elementary aged self did. As a kid, Ducky and Sunny resonated with me. Now, as a twenty-something, I can understand how difficult Sunny is, but I appreciate Ducky more and more.
I’m sad Lerangis was not able to write the last of the series. His writing is so natural, so fitting. I took a long break before starting this book of the series because I knew it was a lot to digest. The previous six of the series had a lot going on in terms of drama, but this installment hit home in a way that I had to prepare myself for, even after countless previous reads.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
September 15, 2010
I very much enjoy the character of Ducky. He seems like someone I would get along with as a real person. I actually see some similarities in our personalities. He needs some assertiveness training STAT! Which I'm told all the time.
His "handwriting" can get to be a bit much in the journal. I had a really concentrate on the word flick. It just looked REALLY bad.
My biggest problem with this story is that Ducky is supposed to be 16 and a bit of an outcast, so he starts hanging out with 13 y/o's... um okay, way to alienate yourself more Duckster.
Not so subtle hints... this is the only "DUCKY" book I've read of the series (I've read 1-8 & 11). Curious to see if Ann M. Martin has the guts to make Ducky gay (like it so obviously seems... we'll see). On to book 6 (which is another Dawn book I believe, but possibly Sunny..
His "handwriting" can get to be a bit much in the journal. I had a really concentrate on the word flick. It just looked REALLY bad.
My biggest problem with this story is that Ducky is supposed to be 16 and a bit of an outcast, so he starts hanging out with 13 y/o's... um okay, way to alienate yourself more Duckster.
Not so subtle hints... this is the only "DUCKY" book I've read of the series (I've read 1-8 & 11). Curious to see if Ann M. Martin has the guts to make Ducky gay (like it so obviously seems... we'll see). On to book 6 (which is another Dawn book I believe, but possibly Sunny..
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
May 2, 2009
DUCKY!!!! He is my favorite character. In Sunny's diary (Sunny's First Diary) you can obviosly see how caring he is, and funny, and just plays it cool. He's so "chill" all the time. So when I got to this diary, i thought "YESS!!! IT'S DUCKY!!! HE ROCKS!!!" But it's wasn't as I expected. He has some probs. in his life, i mean not as drastic as Sunny's problems are, but inside Ducky, he isn't always that cool and conected person as he seems to be.
January 3, 2015
Another great book in this series. Wow. Ducky is perhaps my favorite character. He needs to speak up more, but wow he handles things really well.
I cried reading about Alex. As someone with depression, I've been there. I know what that's like. And unlike Alex I know it can get better, and that you have to hold onto life one moment at a time. It was beautifully written and I just really like this book.
I cried reading about Alex. As someone with depression, I've been there. I know what that's like. And unlike Alex I know it can get better, and that you have to hold onto life one moment at a time. It was beautifully written and I just really like this book.
February 10, 2023
I was feeling myself get choked up reading this one live. Ducky is, to me, the most painfully relatable character and I adore him.
TW: This book contains a character who attempts suicide so be cautious of that.
This is one of the better YA books we've covered on stream but it definitely made us go Code Level Kitten.
TW: This book contains a character who attempts suicide so be cautious of that.
This is one of the better YA books we've covered on stream but it definitely made us go Code Level Kitten.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
January 12, 2024
Intense, but an important story to tell. Ducky deals with his childhood BFF Alex's depression and suicidal ideation, and his other childhood BFF Jay's becoming too cool to hang out with Ducky like before.
Ducky is SUPER queer-coded, and if this book is written today, this likely would've included his coming out story.
TW: suicide attempt, depression
Ducky is SUPER queer-coded, and if this book is written today, this likely would've included his coming out story.
TW: suicide attempt, depression
March 29, 2010
This book was awesome! I loved it! I love Ducky’s diaries they are the best ones in my opinion. I never really liked Ann M. Martin books and I still don’t. This series was okay but it was not the best series I have ever read. Anyways I still recommend the series.
May 21, 2011
I am so mad the author and publisher thought this font was a good idea. It was so difficult to read! It made me not like the book. The story was okay and as part of a series it continued to tell a story, but no way would I have fought through it as a stand alone.
August 27, 2024
I know it kind of sort of is, but this felt so much like a piece of a book and not an actual book that it was super unsatisfying. As far as the characters we've had so far in this series, Ducky was the most difficult to relate to--maybe, strangely, it's the second person? Or maybe because Ducky is making himself into all of these different things depending on what he thinks his friends like/want out of him?
Either way, an important subject, but not encapsulated well into a book in my opinion.
Either way, an important subject, but not encapsulated well into a book in my opinion.
June 9, 2022
I’m pretty sure this is going to be one of the best books in the series. My heart hurts for these poor souls and I hope Alex isn’t in too much trouble. I’m not sure if that counts as a spoiler or not so I’ve put it under spoilers just in case.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
May 17, 2023
Rereading this series as an adult is so intense. These kids are going through it, and there are zero caring parents around. Amalia is the only one who has parents who even speak to their child. The other four teenagers are completely disconnected from any emotional support. 🥺😬
August 27, 2024
At one point in his diary, Ducky complains that all his friends expect him to be there--to show up with rides or jokes or sympathy as needed, and be whatever they need, not himself. I agree. Even in Diary form, Ducky's story is more about everyone else than Ducky.
April 10, 2019
Read as a kid
Read
April 4, 2021Read my recap at A Year with the BSC via Stoneybrook Forever: www.livethemovies.com/bsc-blog/califo...
September 4, 2022
3.5 stars
April 21, 2023
handwriting was unbearable
July 19, 2023
I will forever love Ducky.
February 8, 2025
Damn, the Duckster is really deep in it!
December 8, 2024
I usually don't like the male lead books, like Logan but maybe Logan is boring as well as being the worst. But after four books of Ducky being a loveable sidekick always coming to the rescue of the girls he takes centre stage in his own book. Ducky is lost. His two best friends have gone their separate ways. Jay has joined the jocks and Alex has sunk into a deep depression. He's also feeling out of sorts with life. No friends his own age, just four 13 year old girls, his home life sucks, parents never home and basically want nothing to do with either of their children, his brother has his own life, they live on takeout and cold cereal, the house is a disaster zone and his grades are slipping. It all comes to a head when Jay invites them to a wild party at his house and Alex sinks into a drunken depression and locks himself in the bathroom. While it was slow to start it did pick up about half way through. Sunny is the only one of the girls who really features in this book as Ducky takes her to the hospital to visit her mom. Dawn shows up and when Jay eats ribs slowly in front off her it was kind of funny to see self righteous Dawn put in her place a bit. But it was nice to see Ducky and see he's not the confident jolly soul he's portrayed as but a flawed confused depressed teenager who you can't help but cheer on. Much like Amalia's story this one too ends on a bit of a cliffhanger.
December 7, 2010
The California Diaries were interesting for me because I lived in California when I read them. Otherwise, they were boring, teenage drivel which held no interest for me. I didn't learn much from them... in fact I'd go so far as to say that they killed some of my brain cells. Lame. Not much else to say to them, really.
September 18, 2014
I think I like this book because I read in the back of book its say Am I doing enough? Am I doing to much? where EXACTLY DO I fit into all of this? I DON'T KNOW. I SHOULD know, but I don't. I think it will be fun.
Read
November 17, 2008i liked it
February 13, 2009
What I learned from this book is how to write the most depressed story about myself followed by Ann M. Martin viewpoint! I know that's lame. But I really happy that I did.
September 21, 2013
Ducky was such a cool character in the other journals, but the ones he wrote himself were kinda boring. And hard to read, because he wrote in the third person.
January 4, 2010
i learned the loliness of a man can kill himself
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