Jump to ratings and reviews
Rate this book

True Hearts #5

When I'm Gone

Rate this book
The night I almost took my own life, he was there.

The night I said 'no' and nobody heard me, he was there.

The night doctors told me I only had hours to live, he was there.

But when I'm gone... who will be there for him...


This novel - and those in the True Hearts collection - are stand alone ebooks with similar themes and unrelated stories. Meaning you can enjoy these Top 100 Kindle All-Star books in any order you'd like! Listed here are the books based on publication date:
5 Years Later
Dear Everly,
Anna's Dress
Let You Go
When I'm Gone
What You Don't Know

298 pages, Kindle Edition

First published May 1, 2018

646 people are currently reading
694 people want to read

About the author

Jaxson Kidman

87 books1,393 followers

Ratings & Reviews

What do you think?
Rate this book

Friends & Following

Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!

Community Reviews

5 stars
349 (51%)
4 stars
200 (29%)
3 stars
92 (13%)
2 stars
32 (4%)
1 star
8 (1%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 101 reviews
Profile Image for Olga therebelreader.
894 reviews767 followers
January 2, 2019
In short:
Hero 5/5 | Heroine 5/5 | Plot (Point, Originality) 4/5 | Writing Style 4/5 | Steam 4/5 | Romance 5/5 | Angst-Suspense 3/5 | Darkness 3/5 | Humor 1/5 | Secondary Characters 4/5 | Drama-Conflict 4/5 | Mystery 1/5 | Twists 4/5 | Pacing Steady | Action 3/5
Profile Image for BookAddict.
2,078 reviews207 followers
April 30, 2018
What do you do when the past intrudes, pushing so hard on the present you can’t see your way clear to a future? When your dream goes up in flames? When not existing at all seems a better option than existing mired in pain? When thinking about tomorrow is an insurmountable task because it’s all you can do to make it through today? Sometimes, one single decision, one solitary moment, one snap judgement can change the course of lives. But what if the one you think you’re saving is actually saving you?

Every time I read this author, I know it’s going to be a spectacular experience, so I was honored to be able to read this book a little before its release date. And every time I think I’ve read his best, he surpasses himself, leaving me in awe all over again. Kidman hemorrhages his heart and soul into the words, the settings and the characters until I’m so drenched in emotion I feel it in every cell of my being. It’s a holistic ride – mental, emotional, physical and psychological – and one that makes me feel gutted, ripped, wrenched and wrung out, but leaves me richer, fuller and more satisfied for having lived in this book world for a few hours.

Kace and Sienna are beautifully flawed, achingly human, transparently honest and hopefully optimistic, and their journey to forever left me a little bruised and a little raw but calm, content, peaceful and inspired. These characters will forever own a piece of my heart and I'll revisit them again and again, knowing their story is one which will reveal new gems each time I read it. Kidman doesn’t write to entertain, or for the sole purpose of selling books. He shares the deepest part of himself in the pages, and in doing so, he profoundly touches readers' lives. If you’re tired of fluffy, formula romance and worn out, tired tropes, if you want something authentic, emotive and uplifting, then read this book without delay!

*I reviewed this book freely and voluntarily, having made no commitment to provide a review and receiving no compensation of any kind from any source for this review.
Profile Image for Rejane.
1,366 reviews62 followers
no-way-jose
February 3, 2019
The blurb is enough 😏
Profile Image for Caryn.
2,394 reviews3 followers
May 9, 2018
FACING LIFE HEAD ON

Two people come together when on tries to commit suicide. Sienna has had enough unhappiness in her young life. Kace has too but still can't believe that someone would choose to take themselves out. Kace saves Sienna from jumping off the roof of a building...twice. These characters are very tortured souls who find each other. In spite of themselves, they manage to come together and eventually bond enough to become a relationship. They fall in love and just as they are about to move in together Sienna is struck down by a major health scare.

An interesting story. Not my favorite but worth reading.
Profile Image for Summerdae.
86 reviews
August 12, 2018
Absolutely LOVED it!!!

Can I just say that I totally fell in love with Kace!!! What a man! The whole story from beginning to end was perfect! I may have cried a few times!! Five 🌟 for sure!
1,250 reviews4 followers
February 20, 2019
Emotional rollercoaster

As usual, Jaxson Kidman wrote another emotional filled book. It draws you in on the effect of alcoholic and abusive family can do. Kace - Sienna , Sienne wants to die, growing up not knowing love, her mother was alcoholic and dad was not in the picture. He was in and out of rehab. Kace father and grandfather both alcoholics. Kace sees Sienna on top of the roof. He wants to save Sienna to let her know that her life does have meaning and a lot to live for. They both have their own demons from their pasts. Its a slow process to open up and heal for both, falling in love along the way. Great read and great audiobook too!
Profile Image for Laurie Gyd.
1,966 reviews9 followers
February 2, 2020
Emotional romance

Extremely emotional romance with lots of real life up’s and downs. Can two broken people heal each other and find the will to live life to the fullest.
Profile Image for Romance Rehab.
351 reviews81 followers
July 26, 2018
This is a weird one for me to rate, because there were a bunch of things that bugged me, but yet I still liked it. I’ll start with the good.

Here’s what I loved:

1. This was a super emotional read about two characters who both had interesting, complex backstories, and the backstories never got boring. The pacing was handled perfectly.

2. When Kace fell for Sienna, he was all in. It terrified him, but once he came to terms with his feelings, he was pretty much the perfect book boyfriend.

3. Kace and Sienna were super cute together. Their dialogue was adorable, and often really funny.

4. The bromance between Kace and his friend Mack was also a lot of fun.

5. The sex scenes were HOT HOT HOT. And did I mention HOT???

Now for the not so glowy stuff:

1. Kace saved Sienna 4 times in this book. 4 times. That seemed really excessive. I would’ve liked to see Sienna save herself at least once.

2. Sienna was suffering from some pretty serious depression and suicidal tendencies. I would’ve liked to see her check herself into a treatment center. Since she didn’t ever go get help on her own, I think the author was kind of implying that it was Kace’s love that “fixed” her and made her healthy again.

3. There were some formatting errors and what looked like “find and replace” errors in the book that got irritating after a while. (The word “carried” showed up as “Cassied”, which made me think that at one time, there was a character named Cassie in the story who was written out via “find and replace” and the word “carried” was a casualty. That’s just my theory, though.)

4. Kace and Sienna’s relationship bordered on instalove. It wasn’t true instalove, but there was an immediate “pull” between them that was toeing the line of instalove a bit.

5. The dude on the cover was NOT AT ALL what I pictured for Kace. Maybe that’s on me, but it bugged me a little. And I noticed that the same cover model was on a lot of the author’s books. He’s a great looking dude, but he can’t possibly look like ALL of your characters, can he?

But, even with the not so glowy stuff, I still really enjoyed this one and found myself super invested in Kace and Sienna’s happily ever after. I’d read more from this author, and at the end of the day, what better recommendation is there than that?

Don't forget to follow the Romance Rehab blog for reviews, giveaways, and other fun stuff: http://www.romancerehab.com/
Profile Image for Armenia.
907 reviews17 followers
May 5, 2018
“My heart is as damaged as yours...that’s what makes us connect.”

Jaxson Kidman does it again. When I’m Gone is an emotional heavy hitter, it’ll rip your heart and touch it with sorrow and compassion for both Kace and Sienna, two broken souls, each recognizing the pain within the other from a life of disappointment with family and dealing with the crummy deck of cards Fate handed them. Their story doesn’t have a perfect ending. But at least the end of the tunnel brings a brightness promising hope and happiness.

When I’m Gone is a bit dark. Sienna lost her mother in a car accident at a young age. Sienna is still reeling from the loss and is hiding behind a tight mask of control to those around her. Harder still, her grandmother who raised her was incapable of comforting and loving her during her childhood. She grows into adulthood feeling unmoored and unattached to anything. And though Sienna tries to keep the darkness away, it’s at a vulnerable time when Kace stumbles across her at a rooftop. He has enough time to rescue Sienna. Looking into her eyes, he recognizes a familiar look he came across before in his childhood. He knows Sienna is lonely, hurt and scared.

Kace has grown up with a long line of family members to alcoholism. He faces his own demons with an alcoholic father and grandfather, and a loss of a good childhood friend. He’s not about to lose Sienna to the darkness. They spend time together and learn more about each other and the common connections they have. Opening their souls and sharing their past tragedy helps them push through the pain. I love Kace as he shows an infinite amount of patience towards Sienna. He is supportive and non-judgemental. With Kace, Sienna feels wanted and beautiful in ways she could not imagine for herself.

Favorite quote: “Our lives parallel each other...we’ve fought for second chances all our lives.”

Mr. Kidman does a great job. His style of writing is emotional and raw and certainly brings to light some subjects that are dark but handles it wonderfully. I highly recommend this story. I received and voluntarily reviewed an advance reader copy of this book.


Profile Image for ☼.
76 reviews1 follower
August 31, 2020
“It was a little troublesome to me how easy it was to lie. To put another lie on top of the previous one. Like building blocks as a kid, waiting for them to eventually fall. Only my stack wouldn’t fall. It just kept getting higher. To the point where I wanted to kick it over.”


Well, I can only say Sienna spoke directly to my soul. Every moment spent in her mind was like looking deeply into mine. I loved her, that's all I have to say.

Kace was a gift sent from heaven, even if he's obsessed with saying darlin', which I hate.

These two are cheesey as hell sometimes, but they stole a part of my heart. You know those little moments they share doing the most domestic things ever, those are my favorites.

“It’s crazy though.”
“What is?”
“This whole thing. My parents left me with nothing but bad memories and a bad heart…”
“And I’m going to take care of that heart.”


This is probably not the best book you'll ever read, but it is one you'll feel close to, and that alone makes it worth reading.

“I’m so sorry, Sienna,” he whispered.
I broke away and looked up at him. “Sorry? For what?”
“For whatever you’re going through right now. It can’t be easy to feel the way you do at the moment. I’m sorry you felt the need to make the decisions you did last night.”
22 reviews
May 3, 2018
Another 5🌟 must read book ❤️

This book took my breath away. The author is a Master at creating characters with difficult pasts and circumstances then weaving them into heartbreakingly beautiful stories.

The very first sentence of the prologue hooked me and set the book up and I couldn't wait to find out all about Kace and Sienna. Their individual pasts and journey together are full of emotion and gut punches. Your heart will be put through it as you read, but it is all so worth it (and the box of tissues you'll need! 😉)

You don't want to miss out on this amazing book! ❤️
Profile Image for Elizabeth Gardner.
333 reviews5 followers
May 3, 2018
Wow. This author really knows how to take several trigger subjects and make them real, raw and bring on the emotional rollercoaster. He hooks you from the beginning and doesn’t let you off until the end. This is a well written, emotionally charged book that will tear you up and put you back together. A must read in my opinion.
3 reviews
May 3, 2018
Wow another amazing read!!!! It's real life stuff......I was really moved by this book.
Profile Image for Alba Herrera.
247 reviews
March 17, 2022
When I'm Gone

Another beautifully written book by Jaxon Kidman. This book starts a little slower than the previous books in this collection. But it's for a good reason. You get the back stories on both Kace and Sierra. They have both been through so much in their lives and have had to grow up and basically fend for themselves since a very young age. Kace lost his mother when he was born and was left to be raised by not one but two alcoholics. His dad and his grandfather, whom despite being a drunk, tried to bring some semblance of normalcy into Kace's life until he passed when he was only 10 years old. Leaving him with a dad who was forever attached to a bottle of whiskey and not concerned about his well-being. Then there's Sierra, who's mother was also an addict to alcohol and other substances. She was then left to be raised by a grandmother who was more concerned with the pity she could get from her friends and neighbors due to the loss of her daughter than actually raising her granddaughter. They had so many issues with commitment, afraid of letting anyone close or into their heart. That is until they meet each other and things quickly change. They fall and they fall hard. They face many obstacles but in the end they find that their love is worth every risk and they fight for their HEA. I definitely recommend this book and the rest of the True Hearts collection. 💕 You won't regret it, Jaxon Kidman is so talented. I'm sure there's something in his beautiful work that will call out to you and capture your interest.
16 reviews
May 2, 2018
An intense, emotional and beautiful read

Whether you believe in fate or not, life sometimes has a way of putting people directly in your path at just the right time. Kace and Sienna both experienced difficult childhoods, shaping who they became as adults. Whilst both in some ways, still cling to their pain and heartache, Kace's optimism and strength becomes the light to Sienna's darkness, the day to her night, providing a safe haven for her. Neither expect the relationship that develops, but you can't help but hope that they get the HEA they deserve. The chemistry between both characters and their similar childhood experiences make for an emotional, real, heart-wrenching read. As always, Jaxson's words pack a punch and keep you hooked, you won't be able to put this book down. Well written, with excellent supporting characters, who could easily have their own books, I would highly recommend it. As always, a 5 star read from one of my favourite authors. 
Profile Image for Tammy Hamilton Green.
738 reviews16 followers
March 27, 2019
Jaxson Kidman always delivers a great read!

This was a beautiful story of how two lost souls come together, and as messed up as they each are, find their way together. They both grow stronger and while I can't say they learned to fight their demons, they just figured out how to live with them and move on. There were some real surprises along the way, some well-written sexy scenes, and some beautiful moments.

Honestly, I could have given it a 5-star, but there were a number of typos that carried through the book. They weren't terribly annoying, but enough to take away, from what should have been a 5-star read. Aside from that, I'll still read Jaxson Kidman. I've read a handful of his books and continue to return to his writing, and there really aren't too many male romance writers out there that I knowingly read.
Profile Image for Patti.
193 reviews2 followers
May 7, 2018
Another huge hit for Jaxson!!! My anxiety was through the roof while reading this book but I loved each and every word I read. It was very tough at times but stick with the real feels you will have and you won't be disappointed. As if you could ever be disappointed with a Jaxson Kidman book!!! Perish the thought!! Kace & Sienna will forever be a part of your heart. Have a tissue ready because you will need it. I was like, "no way, after all that they've been through, it can't end like this!!" Now you HAVE to read the book, its worth it. Read it, Live it, Embrace it & Fall in love all over again.
Profile Image for Jules M. Swyler.
Author 1 book22 followers
March 2, 2020
4.5 Stars - Kace and Sienna both have emotional scars from their childhood and fate brought them together. As a natural fixer, Kace does an excellent job helping Sienna. She tends to pull away, never really having felt love. I appreciate how they tease and find humor in the midst of all the crap they’re dealing with. It is interesting and ironic that she strongly considers dying, then when she wants to live, she may not. Kace and Sienna are hot together. I enjoyed how their backstories were told. It lost half a star due to editing errors, which surprises me for Jaxson Kidman.
Profile Image for Helen Marinovic.
57 reviews
June 10, 2020
Kace & Sienna

I love every book that Jaxson writes, but the standalones hold a special place in my heart, and this one is no exception. The story of Kace and Sienna was beautifully written, with so much depth and feeling. With every page turn you were transported into the book itself and I laughed and cried together with them, because they were so relatable.
It was a magical and at times heartbreaking ride, and has burrowed inside my heart as one of my favourite reads from Jasxon. Thank you for writing such beautifully heartfelt books, if I could give it more than five stars I would. Loved it
Profile Image for Lucylu.
134 reviews
May 3, 2018
Rollercoaster of Emotions

I had to take a break after reading this book to breath. This book makes you laugh, ugly cry, hurt, and smile. Kace & Sienna lived a hard life with many obstacles they barely survived. This books shows how a complete stranger can save ur life just be being there. Jaxson Kidman is such an amazing author, he gives you a piece of his life in his books and let me tell say how it captivates you. This is definitely a must read.
Profile Image for Wendy Douglas.
Author 14 books14 followers
May 5, 2018
Love, love, love!

I loved this book by Jaxson Kidman. I had been waiting for it, anxious to read it, and it was so much more than expected. In some ways it was such a sweet and gentle story, and yet there is nothing really Sweet or gentle about the characters, their history, or the things that made them who they were. I loved the symbolism, and I loved the unconditional acceptance that Kace had for Sienna. And I loved, loved, loved the end! Highly recommended.
Profile Image for Melanie Jo.
1,350 reviews18 followers
May 8, 2018
I'm literally speechless with this book. I have never been so emotionally torn by a book before. Only Jaxson could do that. This book is why he is one of my favorite writers. I'm pretty sure I cried through most of this book. But man, did I enjoy it. I loved this story so much and Sienna and Kace are two of my favorite characters. This book will tear you apart but make you laugh, love and cry. It will be worth it in the end!
Profile Image for Kim Richards.
1,338 reviews7 followers
May 11, 2018
Great Story

I enjoyed this story, so pleased that my thought process was wrong.
I was pulled into the story by the end of the 1st chapter and that's where I stayed till the end.
I personally thought that this story was very emotional and the emotions jumped out at me.
So worth the rating I have given it. I recommend this book.
Jackson Kidman has done it again another brilliant book to add to her list.
Profile Image for Rosia Lively-randolph.
29 reviews
January 27, 2019
Another great read

This is another real life, don't hide the grittier parts of life, fantastic book. This one hit hard for me because I have a father like Kace's. Sometimes I just had too set the story aside and look at my children and realize I've done better for my kids than what my parents did for me, especially when my demons of the past surfaced when Kace described the fights between his father and grand father. Thank you Jaxson for another great read
Profile Image for Carly Davis.
Author 48 books65 followers
May 2, 2018
Hit hard

I've been reading Jaxson's books for a while now and each time I read another he amazes me more and more. I've related to his last few, but this one hit me harder than the rest. It hit hard to home for me. I love that when he writes it is not about a fairytale, but reality. I give this book five stars.
11 reviews1 follower
May 2, 2018
Great Book

This book is one of the best books I've read in a while. Kace and Sienna both have a painful childhoods. Although Kace saves Sienna from hurting herself I think she saves him from a life of being by himself. They finally find a love that will last even stuff hanging over them won't say what you have to read about it.
Profile Image for Valeen Robertson (Live Thru Books Blog).
5,877 reviews213 followers
May 5, 2018
I know that when I dive into a Jaxson Kidman story, there's a good chance it's going to break my heart. And of course that's exactly what When I'm Gone did, from Kace and Sienna's very first meeting to the very end of their journey. So have a box of tissues ready when you start this, because it's going to be a bumpy ride.
Profile Image for Wendy.
37 reviews1 follower
May 6, 2018
Fate

The way Kace and Sienna kept coming together for her to be saved is fate. I enjoyed reading since they had to work for the relationship and didn't start one their first encounter. Taking the leap and talking about addiction and suicide was huge but you did it perfectly. I always enjoy your books.
323 reviews2 followers
May 6, 2018
When I'm Gone

I rarely read books that make me cry! This one was about a young girl whose life was one tragity after another yet she survived. How? A young man whose life was also filled with tragity. It was a great book with a semi-happy ending. You will love it but have your Kleenex ready.
26 reviews
May 7, 2018
Wow!

If you're looking for a book that will tug at your heart this is it. This book hits all the emotions and topics most people don't like to talk about. But this is definitely a must read. Jaxson Kidman did it again with Kace and Sienna and there story of how they help each other heal.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 101 reviews

Can't find what you're looking for?

Get help and learn more about the design.