Refinery29 Money Diaries: Everything You've Ever Wanted To Know About Your Finances. And Everyone Else's

by Lindsey Stanberry

Understanding your money isn’t a once-a-year (or once-a-lifetime) project, but something that’s easier to manage when you tackle it every day, and Refinery29 Money Diaries is the perfect step-by-step guide to all things personal finance—from managing college loans to saving for a house, asking for a raise, and much more!

The first step to getting your financial life in order is tracking what you spend. Refinery29’s hugely popular franchise “Money Diaries” offers readers an up-close-and-personal look at the financial lives of millennial women from all around the country who share every detail of their spending over seven days—even the purchases they hide from partners and friends. And now, the series creator is taking the franchise offline for the very first time with the ultimate financial resource for these young women: Refinery29 Money Diaries.

Interwoven among 52 brand-new money diaries will be weekly financial challenges to encourage you to take immediate action. Some will be simple (choose a money mantra), others more challenging (learn how to rollover your 401(k)). Some weeks might have seasonal advice (for example, how to prepare your taxes or how to save for the holidays). Every challenge will keep you engaged, while helping you to be more confident about managing your money. This is about so much more than money, it's about taking control of your future.

Genres: Nonfiction, Finance, Personal Finance, Self Help, Money, Personal Development, Business

326 pages, Kindle Edition

First published September 4, 2018

Reviews

[emma · Rating 4 out of 5]

bettering myself.

this was very readable and i got a lot out of it even though money makes me uncomfortable and i hate it.

also money diaries are fun.

bottom line: the least bad way to try to feel better about "doing finances."

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tbr review

watch out. when i read this book and finally cure my addiction to spending $12 every time i leave the house, it's over for everyone else

[Julie Ehlers · Rating 3 out of 5]

Recently I've become obsessed with Money Diaries on Refinery29. It's so interesting to see how other people spend their money—and, by extension, how they live their lives. It was that obsession, coupled with a desire to think about what my financial goals are now that I'm doing OK moneywise, that led me to pick up this book. As it turns out, the book has only 9 actual money diaries in it—one at the beginning of each chapter—but this was fine; I suspect an entire book of money diaries would get old pretty fast.

The rest of the book is fairly basic, but it touches on a lot of different topics: emergency funds, retirement and investing, renting/buying a home, debt repayment, work and money, and how your money interacts with others in your life, be they parents, spouses, kids, or other family members. All of this is useful if you're new to the topic or just looking for a kind of refresher (as I was), but this book also has some pretty big blind spots.

The most annoying of these blind spots is author Lindsey Stanberry's assumption that we're all out here just throwing money away, eating out all the time, buying really frivolous items, and taking cabs and Ubers constantly. A lot of her advice is along the lines of "You can save a lot of money if you just stop doing x," and it never seems to occur to her that many of us aren't doing x to begin with. She also brags about how she and her husband bought a one-bedroom Brooklyn apartment before they turned 30, and attributes it all to how frugal they were: always cooking dinner at home, bringing bagged lunches to work instead of buying, drinking PBR instead of craft beer. She overlooks the one thing that *really* helped them buy a home: a dual income. None of that other stuff would have saved her enough money if she hadn't had someone else's income and savings to combine with her own. This was annoying. Women are staying single longer but often make less money than men due to the wage gap, a tendency to enter (lower-paid) helping professions, often being the primary caregiver for kids and aging parents, etc. How about some advice they can really use? This book barely touches on those issues, or the issue of balancing work and family, or the issue of wage stagnation, or the fact that some of us aren't interested in being exceedingly wealthy (one of Stanberry's admitted goals) but want to have a decent life now while also ensuring we're not out in the cold when we're ready to retire. This book was so focused on the future, but I was confused about when any of the money I should be saving could actually be spent. Seemingly, I shouldn't be having any fun until I retire. This isn't just depressing, it's unrealistic.

And speaking of unrealistic, the final nail in the coffin came near the end of the book, when Stanberry advances the idea you should have saved an amount equal to your salary by the time you're 30. Sure, this seems near-impossible, Stanberry says, but if you want to save $60,000 by the time you're 30, you need to save "only" about $25 a day from age 23 on. That's $175 a week! I never could have saved that much a week in my 20s no matter how much I cut back, and I'm sure I'm not alone. It was very weird that Stanberry didn't seem to realize that.

This book was also a depressing reminder that people with jobs that actually add value to our culture, like teaching and social work, make very little money relatively speaking, while people with total B.S. jobs make a lot more.

Still, despite all my complaining, this book was entertaining and I did find it useful in helping me clarify my own financial goals. If you just want some basic info and some money diaries, this book might be right for you. Just be aware that a lot of its views are incomplete/unrealistic and don't let it get you down.

[Kimmie · Rating 1 out of 5]

The money diaries themselves are interesting but the financial advice given is highly questionable. Of course finance is personal and everyone handles it differently, but I don't feel that this book really acknowledged this. Rather it presented the advice as fact, which is troublesome as I'm sure they have younger readers who will take their advice to heart and not do their own independent research.

A couple points that bothered me:
-The authors never even address the possibility of aggressively paying down student loans. They refer to student debt as good debt since it is an investment in your future self, but in today's student loan bubble, this just isn't true. They mention the amount of money one would earn if they started investing early, but fail to discuss the amount of money one would save in interest if they paid more than just the minimum payments. As a book geared towards millennial women where the average student loan debt hovers around $30k, it seemed like such a let down to not spend more time discussing this topic. They also do not discourage readers from taking on more debt (in the form of cars/mortgages) while carrying student loan debt. They also state that one doesn't need to stop living an enjoyable life while paying off debt, so there's no reason to make getting rid of student loan debt a priority. I'm not trying to judge their method of setting financial priorities, if it works for them great! The fact that they're touting this ideology as truth though is worrying. Maybe I've drank Dave Ramsey's Kool-Aid of "in order to be like no one else, you need to live on no one else", but I think it's at least worth mentioning to readers that getting rid of debt early to have more flexibility in terms of career choices can be a smart move.

-The author advises people should pick a target retirement age to invest their 401ks since it's easy... without once mentioning the high fees they charge that eat away into the earnings. Again, terrible advice because they did not talk about the downsides of picking that investment. It wouldn't have been so hard to throw in a line about the high fees they charge...

-The author doesn't discuss fixed vs. variable mortgages or 30 vs 15 year mortgages, and the amount one could save if they picked a 15 year fixed rate mortgage (which could be in the hundreds of thousands). Again, if there is going to be a whole chapter devoted to buying a home, it seems silly to not touch upon those points.

-The author's tone on investing in the last chapter was quite odd. She made investing seem like a necessary chore that just "had to be done". She talks about this stereotype of women being afraid to invest, but then goes on to act like she's scared of it, and it's best to hire a financial advisor or a use a robo-investor, and leaves it at that. Although this type of investing is arguably better then nothing, it's quite frightening that risk is never discussed. There is risk in all types of investments, and encouraging people to invest without touching upon them is unethical.

I did enjoy the chapters on navigating personal relationships with finances, negotiating higher raises, and the importance of saving for retirement. There is value I gained from the book and overall would like to recommend it, but because of the points above, just can't with a clear conscience.

*Side note, I listened the audible version of this book. The narration was terrible! Lindsey sounded like a girl reading a middle school graduation speech off index cards. The other woman who read the money diaries gave this flat monotonous depressing tone to each diary. It's hard to explain, but I think I may just be spoiled by the high quality narrations of past audible books I've listened to.

[Kate · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is a book on personal finance for people who have never previously heard the phrase “personal finance.” If you have heard of personal finance, warning: you may rip your hair out upon reading.

Money Diaries is a book-ized version of the popular Money Diaries Refinery 29 web series, wherein millennial women spend a week recording every dollar they spend and then share it – along with their salary, debt, and other monthly expenses – with strangers on the internet. The series was started to increase transparency around personal finance and spending. While I wholeheartedly agree this mission, it does not automatically align with wise personal finance decisions. Many, many of the money diaries regularly feature poor understandings of finance and alarming spending habits (I think the avocado toast guy probably used these journals for the basis of his argument).

This isn’t necessarily problematic on the website: its goal is to share what people are spending, and that’s accomplished each time a new diary gets published. But the book version isn’t merely a collection of those journals in print: it’s a money diary, followed by financial advice in some arena of life (e.g. debt, relationships, education).

Now, if you’re going to write a book with the ostensible purpose of helping people get their personal finances in order, you need to do some actual analysis of spending and say: this is what worked, this is what didn’t, this is where you could improve. It’s not enough to present a diary, physically place it next to some financial information elsewhere on the page, and then hope the reader magically makes the connection between the two. Doing the analysis and making the connection is why you’re writing the book. But this poses a problem, because the entire point of the original Money Diary series was to present people’s spending sans judgment. These two goals are at odds: presenting what someone spends, no comment, makes it difficult to educate the reader; writing a personal finance book means educating the reader but analyzing and judging the diary.

An example: one featured couple’s diary sees them throwing extra payments at their 0% APR credit card debt while paying the bare minimum on their interest-bearing student loans. Many chapters later, in a spread of less than 2 pages that discusses paying down debt, it’s briefly mentioned that, hey, paying high-interest debt first might be a good idea. Having spent much time reading about personal finance, it was obvious – to me – that this couple’s strategy wasn’t the strongest and they’re going to spend significantly more than they need to in interest. But if you’re a newcomer to this world, you’ll read the couple’s diary, think, “Huh! What a nice couple!” and never make the connection that they’re screwing themselves over. An effective personal finance book would have pointed out for you: by paying interest-bearing debt first, this couple will save X amount of money over the coming year. As a bonus, it could run those savings through a compound calculator and see how much they’ll have in 30 years if they could have invested it instead.

(Also noted: the couple has a high enough income to wipe out both debts completely in less than a year, but chose not to – nor does the book even hint at such a possibility. Money Diaries is heavy on the “debt is serious but hey you’re still young and should have fun! Tee-hee!” philosophy, which makes me grit my teeth and roll my eyes and beat my chest in despair all at the same time and may be contributing to why I’m spending way too much a chunk of my life writing this review at all.)

All this stems from the fact the book itself doesn’t truly understand personal finance. There’s no cohesive philosophy: instead, it’s numerous other financial approaches – e.g. Your Money or Your Life, Dave Ramsey – repackaged and thrown at the reader in a manner that makes it feel knowledgeable but isn’t detailed enough to allow one to do anything with the information. It’s like throwing a whole bunch of mud at the wall and hoping some of it sticks. I get the sense that if I was new to personal finance, I would have read the whole thing, felt really inspired, and then walked away and never thought about this again because it’s too many concepts in too little detail to truly apply to any area of my life.

Finally, while the cover lists Lindsey Stanberry as the author, it should say, “with Priya Malani,” because at least 80% of the advice sections start with, “I asked Priya to tell me how…” or, “Priya helped me…” or, “Priya told the best way to…” and then proceeds to simply repeat whatever Priya said. This may explain the lack of depth. (Poor Priya gets nothing except a brief callout in the acknowledgements section, and even then her name is lumped together with a bunch of other people.)

I gave this book 2 stars because for the truly, absolute beginner whose money is a disaster, the process of seeing other people’s spending might encourage them to at least do their own money diary for a week and become more aware of their habits. And also because, if nothing else, it was entertaining to read (but in a train-wreck kind of way. On the website, the comments section has a culture of “people read this series just to write judgy comments.”) But in the hands of someone who actually wants to get their financial life in order, the cavalier, “oh you’re fine!” attitude without any philosophy or clear approach may actually lead to the kind of passivity and lack of improvement that will set you back.

[K · Rating 2 out of 5]

There were some helpful tips in here but I consider myself a little more informed than the average reader. The money diaries weren’t as fun without the comment section. And I knew it would be lacking a race/class/oppression analysis but it was super hard to get through because of it. Someone complained that their neighborhood wasn’t gentrifying rapidly enough.

[steph · Rating 4 out of 5]

One of my favorite things to do on my lunch break or on my late afternoon break if I didn't read it on my lunch break is get on my phone and read the latest Money Diary update. I have been reading these daily diaries for about a year now and I find them utterly fascinating. I love reading about how different woman from different walks of life with different jobs, incomes, experiences, families, etc. spend their money. I like learning about what is a priority for them and what is not. I like seeing them try to pay down debt, save for a house, take care of elderly parents, raise their kids, stay out at bars until 2am, run with their dogs every morning, listen to podcasts, go to their therapist, watch a bunch of Netflix, etc. It's a glimpse into their world and their finances and in a society that doesn't talk about money, I really appreciate the entries showing me how women spent their money on a day to day basis.

That said, this book is about 40% Money Diaries and 60% everything else. I like the various chapter topics (work & money, emergencies & money, debt & money, kids & money, parents & money, wealth & money) and the different interviews with different financial experts sprinkled throughout. I liked the interviews with their diarists after their entries and how they expanded on different aspects of their financial life. I don't agree with everything stated, but I agree that we should be more open and aware of our finances and to not be afraid to talk about them. In that vein this book was really well done. I liked how the author sprinkled her own financial life throughout the book (her and her husband arguing about money after they had a kid, saving to buy an apartment, etc.). This was a book I read over a weeks time, a chapter at each sitting and altogether, I found it really interesting and I took away some important information in regards to my own personal finances.

However, my biggest annoyance with this book was the color scheme. Yellow and white? Really? Every time they had a yellow box with white font or a white box with yellow font I felt my eyes straining. I get it, yellow is cute and eye catching but it's also hard on the eyes. Really hard. Pick a different color next time! Yellow is not the best. /end rant

[Alana Benjamin · Rating 4 out of 5]

For years, I have been an undercover stan of R29's Money Diaries. It is, by far, my favorite comment section. So this book was a must read for me.

The money diaries were engrossing as usual but most of the advice sections in this book are really for people in the beginning journey of figuring out their finances for the short-term, like vacations and emergency funds and long-term, like 401k and buying property. However, there are tidbits of information that everyone can benefit from, including tips on negotiating salaries and 529 plan.

I would recommend reading this book if you are trying to figure out your relationship with money. It provides great context through different scenarios illustrated with the money diaries as well as advice from contributors. This book does not give you a cookie cutter approach to finances but many adaptable options.

This book prompted me to read more finance books catered to younger demography because in my 20s, my go-to on finance issues was Suze Orman and the occasional Oprah segment.

[Madeleine · Rating 2 out of 5]

a fascinating relic of mid2010s white feminism - an unapologetic ode to maintaining/hoarding and growing wealth lacking any race or class analysis. i also wanted more concrete tips (i still don’t understand how investing works??? why is there a whole book about personal finance with only the most surface level explanation of these things?). there was nothing about donating to nonprofits or mutual aid efforts within this

[Kelsey O · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed the money diaries, as I’m always interested in how others spend and save their money. The instructional chapters were not very helpful. Overall, it was more of a fascinating read than educational book. Worth the $1 I spent on it at Goodwill.

[Megan Aruta · Rating 4 out of 5]

Super interesting. Not all the advice is good advice, but made me think a lot about my own finances, so I would recommend.

[Amy · Rating 4 out of 5]

I consider myself a knowledgeable person, somebody who knows at least a little bit about a great number of subjects, but the one subject I have never been able to fully grasp was the subject of economics. I did not understand how money worked for most of my life, and as such, I have been deeply afraid of it. I did not understand how to go about saving money, what an IRA was, or how to even approach the topic in either my professional or personal life. As an introduction to the topic specially catered towards my demographic of millenial women, Lindsay Stanberry's "Money Diaries" performs wonderfully. It provides a snapshot of women all over the country of widely different financial backgrounds and circumstances and offers insight into how each of these real women tackle the basic financial issues of paying off student debt, living with parents, budgeting, and more.

At a glance, some of the more negative reviews claim that "Money Diaries" is far too simplistic of an approach to money, but in my opinion, it is the perfect starting point for financially ignorant people such as myself. It destigmatizes the topic with each money diary entry, allowing the reader to relate to real life financial struggles, and encourages active participation with one's income through discussion, questions, and exercises. Though I do wish it went further in depth, it accomplishes its purpose of getting millenials to truly consider their finances and begin saving. It's a great introduction, and I feel more comfortable in handling and talking about money after reading it.

[Diana · Rating 3 out of 5]

2.5ish stars, I guess...I mean, it was fine. The "diary" parts were equal parts interesting and annoying. Like, it's interesting to see how other people spend the money they make, but I don't need to hear every single thought about their daily lives you know? It also seemed like all the diaries were written in the same voice which makes me wonder about the authenticity but then, I skimmed the entries so maybe I'm wrong lol. There was really nothing earth-shattering here, but it was nice (as a female millennial) to read a book geared toward other female millennials. Even if it really was trying too hard to be that (do we need to qualify so many expressions with the term "AF"?). Also...are there really that many adult women out there whose parents are still paying their phone bills??! Wowza.

[Russell Tassicker · Rating 3 out of 5]

Lost track of this one for a while, it was a very quick read once I got back to it! Straightforward financial advice interspersed with the voyeuristic thrill of seeing other people's financial details. Strongly US-centric unfortunately, though the more general advice is still good.

[Kelsey (Kelseylovesbooks) · Rating 3 out of 5]

I picked this one up because I’ve read Money Diaries from R29 before and find them interesting - who’s not fascinated by other people’s finances? However that was really the best part of this book. It’s trying to be financial advice for everyone, but that means it just skims the surface of every topic.

[Julia · Rating 2 out of 5]

Unfortunately, this book was not a collection of Money Diaries — it was a basic personal finance book with a few Money Diaries scattered throughout. I didn't learn very much from the content, although the section on student loans was illuminating and sad. At least Money Diaries are almost always entertaining… mostly because any form of explanation given in the context of spending money sounds like a justification.

[lizzie ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆]

I finished this but I feel as though it’s not the right time in my life for me to read it... but I’ll probably revisit it when it’s time. I found the money diaries interesting, and pretty compelling and interesting. I do think that it would be useful for the right people though and I did take some tips from it!

(Leaving without rating because i don’t feel the need to rate it just because I personally read it at the wrong time, that says nothing about the book or content in the book itself.)

[Stephanie - stephsbookishplace · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is my second time listening to this audiobook and I still think it's a fantastic introduction to personal finance! The money diaries are a super cool glimpse into people's day to day spending. I would 100% recommend this to anyone just wanting to get a solid overview of how they should handle their money - a great straight to the point guide.

[Selena · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was fun!! I was not aware of the Refinery29 Money Diaries, but I absolutely love getting nosey and detailed about other people’s finances (see previous and maybe still current Ramit Sethi fangirl phase). So when Crystal (who I also have annual money reviews with) gave me this one I was very excited.

I don’t know that I learned a ton from this book, and anyone with slightly above basic money knowledge will probably know most of the strategies and concepts from this book. This definitely targeted millennial women and kind of read more like a magazine than a book. I liked reading the actual diaries, but the author also puts in good overviews and tips around several money topics. I appreciated some of the more “emotional” money subjects in here (ex. A list of financial questions to review with your partner, things to think about when asking for a raise, ways to look around and suss out work culture for future family planning flexibility). Nitpicky but the font/background coloring was very difficult to read sometimes and once in a while the authors voice annoyed me. But overall fun and worth the quick read!

[Leilani · Rating 4 out of 5]

It is undeniable that money has changed in the last few decades. Our salaries, our investments, our bank accounts all look different from the baby boomer generation. I think this book is a great read for the younger population because it shows what we’re all spending our money on. It’s a view into the dirty secrets of other hard-working women. You can read other personal finance books that will tell you to be a spendthrift, save for a house, and never spend money on restaurants. This book says otherwise because we’re all different and want different things. The book reveals how some women need to invest in FSAs or other insurance plans while others can put more money into puppy expenses. As a devout reader of the Money Diaries, this book is an analysis and a review of some of the diaries that are relatable to those struggling to figure out what to do with your money when you’re an outlier. Also, while other books are yelling at you this book is relatively easy to digest – even the tough discussions like keeping separate bank accounts from your significant others.

[Serena · Rating 4 out of 5]

Well, this book did what I wanted it to - it inspired me to get my sh*t together financially! It gives good practical advice on making financial plans. My main gripe is that it is US-centric, but to be fair, it never claimed to be anything but that. I know more than I need to about 401(k)s and am so, so glad that I don't live in the states. The 20-something year old's with six-figure salaries were giving me extreme loser feelings until I learned how much they get taxed and how little of that they take home. Mother of God. Also, two other little gripes - yellow font on white paper = illegible, and putting 'super' before a word doesn't make that word a compound word. MINOR GRIPES! I'm going to go pay off all my debt now and get a raise, hoohah murica!

[Lauren Wallace · Rating 2 out of 5]

"But being in control of your finances gives you the freedom to live the life you want." (292)

I found this book to be interesting, however I did find most of the advice not helpful/useful. Some of the advice is legit save money, but doesn't give practical advice to get there. I also found that we shouldn't be taking financial advice from people with high debt, no retirement savings, and dangerous spending habits.

This book was quick read, as I read it in about 2 days!

I don't think I would recommend this book for financial advise.

[Kathryn · Rating 5 out of 5]

A fantastic and accessible approach to personal finance. This book isn't a silver bullet to understanding finances, but will do a good job at putting you on the right track without scaring the personal finance ingenue. The inclusion of personal money diaries, and check-ins with millennial on specific issues (how much are you saving for retirement?) is a big plus, and helps drive home the point that personal finance is just that-- personal. My only real issue with the book is Stanberry's continued use of the tired trope of savings in the context of millennial latte consumption-- can we not?

[Mirage McCloy · Rating 4 out of 5]

A fascinating look into how different women around the country earn, spend, and save their money. Filled with practical information and the perfect balance of breaking down complicated information without insulting your intelligence. Highly recommend.

[Myles Cooper]

I skimmed over it

[Jane]

Feeling lucky that I learned financial sense early and also that I moved to Austin when it was still possible to buy a house on a single public school employee’s salary.

[Mary · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very approachable and thorough guide to all things money.

[Bree M · Rating 4 out of 5]

Insightful, I really like the transparency.

[Randi Smith lady · Rating 4 out of 5]

A good book to get an understanding of finances.

[elise p · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is probably decently helpful for ages 18-23 or so. As a financially solvent 30-year old, not so much. I mostly read the book for the diaries, but honestly, they are way less fun than reading on the website (where you get the ever-entertaining comment section).

[Michelle · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is probably the most useful book on personal finance I've read. The money diaries are also entertaining to read.