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Take Us To Your Trump
The government has been lying to us! Not about public corruption or lurid scandals or secret wiretapping programs... Okay yes, all that stuff too, but I'm not talking about that right now. The government has also been lying to us about space aliens. Aliens have landed on the National Mall and are asking to speak with the President of the United States. For the sake of the planet, diplomat Michael Wallenson is tasked with keeping them away from Donald Trump at all costs. Will Michael succeed? Or will these heavily armed, easily offended aliens succeed in reaching our leader? Building the border dome, coal-powered missiles, and the true identities of the men in black - all in Take Us To Your Trump, another hilarious satirical comedy from author Andrew Stanek.
104 pages, Kindle Edition
Published May 3, 2018
93 people are currently reading
77 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 46 reviews
November 14, 2018
Wonderful satire strikes close to home!!
How would the government react during a visit from extraterrestrials? Especially given the current administration? Take Us To Your Trump is an excellent and hilarious look at what could happen! I loved it and I'll definitely be checking out more from this author!
How would the government react during a visit from extraterrestrials? Especially given the current administration? Take Us To Your Trump is an excellent and hilarious look at what could happen! I loved it and I'll definitely be checking out more from this author!
July 19, 2020
*note: this was posted yesterday, on amazon and goodreads, and I know this because amazon has already approved the review so I was able to just re-paste it from my profile view as it was the newest one listed, so why goodreads is not showing it, at all as if never reviewed it, have no clue.
not kindle unlimited but was freebie day, please be aware that helenbk1 wrote " Poorly executed beat down on government handling of the current crisis I guess it’s supposed to be funny but it just isn’t. This story is merely an excuse for the author to rant against the current administration for encouraging states to open up and restart the economy. I was not entertained" Not sure when I slept through a zombie apocalypse nor even as free book to everyone how anyone could fail to notice "Apocalypse Economics: A Zombie Apocalypse Comedy" or fail to notice the writer was written such others as Take Us To Your Trump and Take Us To Your Trump Again, about aliens...omg, trump caused an alien invasion AND a zombie apocalypse, yanno because someone, who knows who *cough helenbk1 *, said someone said so, and repeated to who knows who all {my bet is on Fox 'news', that is the only 1 he brings up}, checked my amazon gift card balance, have enough to get book 2, support the writers when you can, it is going to be a long pandemic pretty much stuck inside.
Well if y'all do not get evicted and/or have zombie apocalypse or aliens or kids trump is trying to force back to schools still without tracing and without vaccine and without safeguards amid a worldwide pandemic that have banned all travel FROM the U.S., just because the orange turd in the whites only infected swimming cesspool is worrying about his own stocks and those of his already rich donors, yanno while the majority of americans have no jobs, no money, and rent due, but yeah, let's not politicize this like oh trump does, and for gowds sake, stay away from the acid spitting zombies...I heard there is an apocalypse, so stay safe and away from zombies and other brain dead things intent on tearing up the world *republicans and/or those without sense of humor come to mind, wonder why helenbk1*
It's the zombie apocalypse in Seattle, but April's landlord is threatening to kick her out of her zombie-proof safe house unless she pays rent. She and her "friends" - an unemployed ex-insurance salesman and an economist specializing in the apocalypse - have to find a way to make enough to pay rent while fighting their way past zombie hordes and mutant freaks to reach their bank and deposit the money. Selling haircuts to zombies, essential businesses during the zombie apocalypse, and a mysterious government agent who says he's only there to help - all this and more in Apocalypse Economics, a brand new comedy short read from author Andrew Stanek, written because the zombies have gotten to him and eaten his brains.
not kindle unlimited but was freebie day, please be aware that helenbk1 wrote " Poorly executed beat down on government handling of the current crisis I guess it’s supposed to be funny but it just isn’t. This story is merely an excuse for the author to rant against the current administration for encouraging states to open up and restart the economy. I was not entertained" Not sure when I slept through a zombie apocalypse nor even as free book to everyone how anyone could fail to notice "Apocalypse Economics: A Zombie Apocalypse Comedy" or fail to notice the writer was written such others as Take Us To Your Trump and Take Us To Your Trump Again, about aliens...omg, trump caused an alien invasion AND a zombie apocalypse, yanno because someone, who knows who *cough helenbk1 *, said someone said so, and repeated to who knows who all {my bet is on Fox 'news', that is the only 1 he brings up}, checked my amazon gift card balance, have enough to get book 2, support the writers when you can, it is going to be a long pandemic pretty much stuck inside.
Well if y'all do not get evicted and/or have zombie apocalypse or aliens or kids trump is trying to force back to schools still without tracing and without vaccine and without safeguards amid a worldwide pandemic that have banned all travel FROM the U.S., just because the orange turd in the whites only infected swimming cesspool is worrying about his own stocks and those of his already rich donors, yanno while the majority of americans have no jobs, no money, and rent due, but yeah, let's not politicize this like oh trump does, and for gowds sake, stay away from the acid spitting zombies...I heard there is an apocalypse, so stay safe and away from zombies and other brain dead things intent on tearing up the world *republicans and/or those without sense of humor come to mind, wonder why helenbk1*
It's the zombie apocalypse in Seattle, but April's landlord is threatening to kick her out of her zombie-proof safe house unless she pays rent. She and her "friends" - an unemployed ex-insurance salesman and an economist specializing in the apocalypse - have to find a way to make enough to pay rent while fighting their way past zombie hordes and mutant freaks to reach their bank and deposit the money. Selling haircuts to zombies, essential businesses during the zombie apocalypse, and a mysterious government agent who says he's only there to help - all this and more in Apocalypse Economics, a brand new comedy short read from author Andrew Stanek, written because the zombies have gotten to him and eaten his brains.
June 3, 2018
*POSSIBLE SPOILERS AHEAD… BEWARE*
If you have a little time to kill and are looking for a fun book to read or if you just want to read something about aliens and Trump, well then my friend your search ends here. Take Us to Your Trump is a hilarious political satire. I personally have not followed the escapades of our current President, but I have heard about some of his more popularized shenanigans. And many of those are written about in this novel.
As the story progresses, you get to encounter some colorful characters.
For the aliens we have: First Envoy Vaux the Unnecessarily Ceremonial and Vice-Envoy Zilurt the Contrition-Bearer. Vaux and Zilurt are Fornaxians, an alien species that has strict rules about politeness. They come from a destroyed planet looking for some supplies on earth. They’ve landed in the United States to make a deal with the current President.
For the humans we have: Michael Wallenson, Barry Kidd, Gerald Mann, and of course President Trump. Among the three, Michael and Barry shine the most. Gerald does nothing for the story, except to say something can’t be confirmed or denied. Michael has endless achievements, almost as long as a CVS receipt. And Barry is an IDIOT! The characters of the President and Barry Kidd seemed genuinely crazy to me. I can’t imagine how people can be that dense and stupid, but then again we live in a troublesome time. There are people who are actually like that, maybe not to the extent of Barry.
Besides the aliens, Michael was the only sane person in this entire novel… and some other minor characters. He represented a normal person with common sense (even though he is nothing but normal, that dude has an amazing resume). The part where Bourque lists his achievements along with Barry’s achievements was awesome.
I hated Barry so much. I really wanted to go into the book and strangle him. He almost ruins everything. I can’t believe he didn’t die from eating so much glue. Barry asking if the aliens were Muslims is just great!
Overall, this book is a pretty great. I’d recommend it to anyone who isn’t too serious, and wants a quick read and a good time.
*I would like to thank Andrew Stanek and LibraryThing for giving me a free copy of Take Us to Your Trump. *
If you have a little time to kill and are looking for a fun book to read or if you just want to read something about aliens and Trump, well then my friend your search ends here. Take Us to Your Trump is a hilarious political satire. I personally have not followed the escapades of our current President, but I have heard about some of his more popularized shenanigans. And many of those are written about in this novel.
As the story progresses, you get to encounter some colorful characters.
For the aliens we have: First Envoy Vaux the Unnecessarily Ceremonial and Vice-Envoy Zilurt the Contrition-Bearer. Vaux and Zilurt are Fornaxians, an alien species that has strict rules about politeness. They come from a destroyed planet looking for some supplies on earth. They’ve landed in the United States to make a deal with the current President.
For the humans we have: Michael Wallenson, Barry Kidd, Gerald Mann, and of course President Trump. Among the three, Michael and Barry shine the most. Gerald does nothing for the story, except to say something can’t be confirmed or denied. Michael has endless achievements, almost as long as a CVS receipt. And Barry is an IDIOT! The characters of the President and Barry Kidd seemed genuinely crazy to me. I can’t imagine how people can be that dense and stupid, but then again we live in a troublesome time. There are people who are actually like that, maybe not to the extent of Barry.
Besides the aliens, Michael was the only sane person in this entire novel… and some other minor characters. He represented a normal person with common sense (even though he is nothing but normal, that dude has an amazing resume). The part where Bourque lists his achievements along with Barry’s achievements was awesome.
I hated Barry so much. I really wanted to go into the book and strangle him. He almost ruins everything. I can’t believe he didn’t die from eating so much glue. Barry asking if the aliens were Muslims is just great!
Overall, this book is a pretty great. I’d recommend it to anyone who isn’t too serious, and wants a quick read and a good time.
*I would like to thank Andrew Stanek and LibraryThing for giving me a free copy of Take Us to Your Trump. *
April 22, 2020
Crazy story for crazy times ... very funny but only if you live in the real world.
I loved this short book. Had me laughing out loud at times. It’s not for everyone though I think. If you’re a a Trump fan ... and buy his crap ... you’re not going to like it much. You’re also living in fantasy land if you believe anything he says. Anyway, I really liked the way this story takes what Trump is and does and magnifies it to the absurd. It takes what most days makes you cringe and makes you laugh. It makes me think just how ridiculous the political situation is in the US and how incompetent fools are given jobs and privilege. Its good to laugh at it for a few hours instead of worry about how the US will ever be able to recover it’s reputation. Perhaps the solution in this story is the only one that would work in the real world too ... here’s hoping someone in the administration tries it before it’s too late.
I loved this short book. Had me laughing out loud at times. It’s not for everyone though I think. If you’re a a Trump fan ... and buy his crap ... you’re not going to like it much. You’re also living in fantasy land if you believe anything he says. Anyway, I really liked the way this story takes what Trump is and does and magnifies it to the absurd. It takes what most days makes you cringe and makes you laugh. It makes me think just how ridiculous the political situation is in the US and how incompetent fools are given jobs and privilege. Its good to laugh at it for a few hours instead of worry about how the US will ever be able to recover it’s reputation. Perhaps the solution in this story is the only one that would work in the real world too ... here’s hoping someone in the administration tries it before it’s too late.
October 8, 2019
Potent Political Satire!
As the author clearly warns the reader, if you wear a MAGA hat or are otherwise enamored with President Trump, then this is not a book you will appreciate. For the rest of the world's population, this doesn't stray very far from what could be.
The story is fun and mixes in a bit of MiB, conspiracy theories, and the DMV (RMV) that every stat seems to have. The characters are potent caricatures who have exaggerated stereotypical traits. Our protagonist is a successful diplomat who isn't delivering what the administration wants. With only a week to go before retiring, he gets fired but has a chance to redeem (?) himself when aliens arrive on Earth.
What happens next seems like it came from yesterday's headlines.
This was fun to read while also being quite sobering.
As the author clearly warns the reader, if you wear a MAGA hat or are otherwise enamored with President Trump, then this is not a book you will appreciate. For the rest of the world's population, this doesn't stray very far from what could be.
The story is fun and mixes in a bit of MiB, conspiracy theories, and the DMV (RMV) that every stat seems to have. The characters are potent caricatures who have exaggerated stereotypical traits. Our protagonist is a successful diplomat who isn't delivering what the administration wants. With only a week to go before retiring, he gets fired but has a chance to redeem (?) himself when aliens arrive on Earth.
What happens next seems like it came from yesterday's headlines.
This was fun to read while also being quite sobering.
August 29, 2018
Loved this un-PC Book
A most politically uncorrect book about aliens landing in Washington and trying to negotiate a trade treaty with President Trump. Trump supporters will probably cry foul, but I laughed all the way through this dark comedy/satire/slapstick book. There would be spoilers if I tried to explain the plot, so I'll just repeat some of the best parts. Aliens describe Twitter as "high-level diplomacy tool"; the DMV turns out to be the Men in Black; and "If we can't believe our own President, who can we trust? Besides, we can't believe the aliens. They're liars. The President says so."
So, grab this book before Trump bans it from libraries.
A most politically uncorrect book about aliens landing in Washington and trying to negotiate a trade treaty with President Trump. Trump supporters will probably cry foul, but I laughed all the way through this dark comedy/satire/slapstick book. There would be spoilers if I tried to explain the plot, so I'll just repeat some of the best parts. Aliens describe Twitter as "high-level diplomacy tool"; the DMV turns out to be the Men in Black; and "If we can't believe our own President, who can we trust? Besides, we can't believe the aliens. They're liars. The President says so."
So, grab this book before Trump bans it from libraries.
October 26, 2019
So, a UFO lands in washington d.c. and the two aliens demand to see our leader, donald trump. The problem is, trump is determined to repel the alien threat by building a sphere around the earth and blasting this UFO away. It's decided that someone else should negotiate with the aliens. He does so successfully, but the agreement is put in jeopardy when trump offends one of the aliens by groping them and grabbing them by the genitals. The aliens then say that they must destroy the earth unless trump apologizes. You see the dilemma. I enjoyed the book, but it fits my political point of view. trumpites might have some issues with it.
February 18, 2019
This book is a well done tale spun around many of Donald Trumps activities since being elected. I highly recommend it to people who are not particularly fond of Trump. It's really funny, not only about Trump but there is another character whose mode of life defies description and yet the author does a good job of creating this character to be silly and odd as can be. On the other hand, for people who like Donald Trump, I highly recommend you don't read this book...spare yourself the aggravation.
December 2, 2019
I don't know how I got this copy, but I was intrigued by the synopsis.
If you are a hard right Trump fan, you will want to skip this book.
If you are open to satire, give it a read. The funniest moments are when you can make fun of yourself. It took me a while to finish this book. My interest would wane. But in the end, it was pretty well thought out. There are moments that will offend some, but we need to be able to be critical of the actions of our leadership at all levels.
Have a GoodReads.
If you are a hard right Trump fan, you will want to skip this book.
If you are open to satire, give it a read. The funniest moments are when you can make fun of yourself. It took me a while to finish this book. My interest would wane. But in the end, it was pretty well thought out. There are moments that will offend some, but we need to be able to be critical of the actions of our leadership at all levels.
Have a GoodReads.
June 9, 2022
Trump apologizes
A UFO lands in D.C. They have come to make a trade agreement. They are taken by The Men-in-black to their HQ, the DMV. An about to be fired State Department employee is pressed into service as well as his Trump appointee assistant.
The treaty is written without President Trump being seen, even though the aliens really want him there. The aliens are very polite and if they are insulted, they will destroy the earth. It seems the best for everyone to keep Trump out of it.
I laughed. I giggled. I snorted. It was a hoot.
A UFO lands in D.C. They have come to make a trade agreement. They are taken by The Men-in-black to their HQ, the DMV. An about to be fired State Department employee is pressed into service as well as his Trump appointee assistant.
The treaty is written without President Trump being seen, even though the aliens really want him there. The aliens are very polite and if they are insulted, they will destroy the earth. It seems the best for everyone to keep Trump out of it.
I laughed. I giggled. I snorted. It was a hoot.
December 1, 2018
Absurdist Satire, Enjoyable.
I didn’t know what to expect from this novella but the title caught my eye so I thought why the hell not.
And I thoroughly enjoyed it.
It’s a quick read but you can’t stop reading it as it’s such an absurd premise but you can’t help but picture this is what would happen.
There’s plenty of laughs to have and the characters are actually all well developed and the ending comes to a natural conclusion.
I didn’t know what to expect from this novella but the title caught my eye so I thought why the hell not.
And I thoroughly enjoyed it.
It’s a quick read but you can’t stop reading it as it’s such an absurd premise but you can’t help but picture this is what would happen.
There’s plenty of laughs to have and the characters are actually all well developed and the ending comes to a natural conclusion.
October 7, 2019
I'm Still Laughing!
What a fantastic piece of satire! I really enjoyed this; however, if you love Trump, you may find it over-the-top wrong! But for those who know it's all true, this author brings out his best to produce Spectacular Laughs! (My sides hurt!) It's short, sweet, & entirely creative.
If you love a good comedy of errors, read the book! If you are looking to laugh, this book has them. If you're not sure, read it anyway. You won't be sorry.....
What a fantastic piece of satire! I really enjoyed this; however, if you love Trump, you may find it over-the-top wrong! But for those who know it's all true, this author brings out his best to produce Spectacular Laughs! (My sides hurt!) It's short, sweet, & entirely creative.
If you love a good comedy of errors, read the book! If you are looking to laugh, this book has them. If you're not sure, read it anyway. You won't be sorry.....
October 10, 2019
Fiction...or Fact?
I thought this was going to be a satiric work of fiction. After reading I am not so sure. Surely aliens from space couldn't be that looney. Earthlings though...maybe.
This was definitely a fun read. The author captured the essence of our current political ridiculousness. Read it if you have a sense of humor about politics. If not, this book won't be your cup of tea.
I thought this was going to be a satiric work of fiction. After reading I am not so sure. Surely aliens from space couldn't be that looney. Earthlings though...maybe.
This was definitely a fun read. The author captured the essence of our current political ridiculousness. Read it if you have a sense of humor about politics. If not, this book won't be your cup of tea.
March 15, 2022
Political satire at it's best
If you're a Trump fan, don't even read a word!!! If you're not, this highly satirical yarn will validate your perceptions, beliefs and gut reactions about the audaciousness of the x-president. I wasn't crazy about the part of Trumps extremely long run-on sentence summarizing all of his grievous misdoings but it certainly made a grand impact to read it that way.
If you're a Trump fan, don't even read a word!!! If you're not, this highly satirical yarn will validate your perceptions, beliefs and gut reactions about the audaciousness of the x-president. I wasn't crazy about the part of Trumps extremely long run-on sentence summarizing all of his grievous misdoings but it certainly made a grand impact to read it that way.
November 9, 2018
Hilarious
I loved, loved, loved this book, because it is filled with absurdist humor. If you are a fan of authors like Douglas Adams, or comedy troupes like Monty Python, you will likely enjoy it very much. Trump fans, however, probably won't, unless they don't take themselves too seriously.
I loved, loved, loved this book, because it is filled with absurdist humor. If you are a fan of authors like Douglas Adams, or comedy troupes like Monty Python, you will likely enjoy it very much. Trump fans, however, probably won't, unless they don't take themselves too seriously.
November 15, 2018
I really debated between 3 and 4 stars. The book is clearly satire, and yet it dances very closing to being TOO over the top. Trump is such low-hanging fruit that this book is almost too much. What finally decided me was the fact that I could really see Trump making all of the Tweets in the book. Is it really satire if it could be real..?
February 14, 2019
I love this book!
If ever a book was true to life, it's this one. Cast aside your qualms, & just let yourself go. Be whisked away to another dimension, so far away, yet so very near to our own! Brings to life the absurdity & the truth of the world as we know it! All we can hope is that the lesson is noted & taken seriously!
If ever a book was true to life, it's this one. Cast aside your qualms, & just let yourself go. Be whisked away to another dimension, so far away, yet so very near to our own! Brings to life the absurdity & the truth of the world as we know it! All we can hope is that the lesson is noted & taken seriously!
October 9, 2020
Hilarious political satire
I am very stingy with my 5 star ratings, but this one was well deserved. With quirky characters in a sci-fi setting, it takes a quick paced jaunt through Trump's cumulative misdoings ( til the book was written). Can't wait to see what he does in the sequel that covers COVID-19 and the economic crash.
I am very stingy with my 5 star ratings, but this one was well deserved. With quirky characters in a sci-fi setting, it takes a quick paced jaunt through Trump's cumulative misdoings ( til the book was written). Can't wait to see what he does in the sequel that covers COVID-19 and the economic crash.
November 3, 2020
Twitter news
The election is tomorrow, the outcome is uncertain. Crazy postings on social media platforms are the norm. This book captured the essence of twitter, fake news allegations, misogyny, and real people devastated in the trump tsunami. Thank you for making a list of aberrations. Political satire is lacking today.
The election is tomorrow, the outcome is uncertain. Crazy postings on social media platforms are the norm. This book captured the essence of twitter, fake news allegations, misogyny, and real people devastated in the trump tsunami. Thank you for making a list of aberrations. Political satire is lacking today.
October 21, 2021
I guess your opinion of this book probably depends on your political views. So when I say I enjoyed the book and thought it was amusing you can tell where I am coming from. Some people take things too seriously, I think it's better to laugh when you can, or you might wind up crying. If you aren't closed minded you will probably enjoy this book.
August 22, 2018
Take us to your Trump by Andrew Santek is one of the best political satires I've read in a very long time.The book is funny from the begining to the end.It does poke fun at President Trump however all in good humor.If you like political satire then this a very good book
September 11, 2018
Funny satire
If you are a proponent of our President, don't read this book. If you are not you will enjoy and laugh at this book. It really pokes fun at what we read or hear about on the news.
If you are a proponent of our President, don't read this book. If you are not you will enjoy and laugh at this book. It really pokes fun at what we read or hear about on the news.
November 8, 2018
Too possible
I enjoyed reading this and he e recommend Dec it to my friends. I hope if a!I end do come, they will have read this too, and know what to destroy first. Also, have wondered about the DMV!
I enjoyed reading this and he e recommend Dec it to my friends. I hope if a!I end do come, they will have read this too, and know what to destroy first. Also, have wondered about the DMV!
December 3, 2018
This was a vaguely amusing satire about aliens coming to Earth and wanting to speak to the US President. I had a couple of little chuckles, but the author tends to be heavy-handed with some of the jokes (I swear glue was mentioned in nearly every single paragraph).
December 4, 2018
Trumped it
Trumped it exceeding well. A wonderful spoof. Can’t imagine what it’s like living in the States waiting for the sky to fall in. So glad my space ship is out of earth’s orbit
Trumped it exceeding well. A wonderful spoof. Can’t imagine what it’s like living in the States waiting for the sky to fall in. So glad my space ship is out of earth’s orbit
August 2, 2019
I did not finish the book.. The humor was silly and unimaginative and not to my liking. I like silly humor but it was so family guy kind of stupid humor...
I stopped reading after 30 pages, it was just too boring for me..
I stopped reading after 30 pages, it was just too boring for me..
October 21, 2019
A Really Good Book, the best book really.
Laugh out loud book with a cameo from our favorite Dr. V. The only down side is that the tweets were such an accurate approximation to the real thing that I could hear the Donald's dumb voice in my head.
Laugh out loud book with a cameo from our favorite Dr. V. The only down side is that the tweets were such an accurate approximation to the real thing that I could hear the Donald's dumb voice in my head.
October 5, 2020
It’d be hilarious if wasn’t so truly believable!’
OMG !! What a hilarious story! It’s so sad the only satisfaction I can get from this president is to read satire about him. Satire is the friend of my enemy!
OMG !! What a hilarious story! It’s so sad the only satisfaction I can get from this president is to read satire about him. Satire is the friend of my enemy!
August 21, 2018
Political satire, that is about the current president, which others watching news may know about. Enjoyable if one likes satires. For it is humerous.
November 10, 2018
Very funny!
An excellent book. I thoroughly enjoyed every bit of this story from the pre-face to the ending. I loved the premise. How timely!
An excellent book. I thoroughly enjoyed every bit of this story from the pre-face to the ending. I loved the premise. How timely!
Displaying 1 - 30 of 46 reviews