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The Tales of Pell #1

Kill The Farm Boy

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In an irreverent new series in the tradition of Terry Pratchett novels and The Princess Bride, the New York Times best-selling authors of the Iron Druid Chronicles and Star Wars: Phasma reinvent fantasy, fairy tales, and floridly overwritten feast scenes.

Once upon a time, in a faraway kingdom, a hero, the Chosen One, was born...and so begins every fairy tale ever told.

This is not that fairy tale.

There is a Chosen One, but he is unlike any One who has ever been Chosened.

And there is a faraway kingdom, but you have never been to a magical world quite like the land of Pell.

There, a plucky farm boy will find more than he’s bargained for on his quest to awaken the sleeping princess in her cursed tower. First there’s the Dark Lord, who wishes for the boy’s untimely death...and also very fine cheese. Then there’s a bard without a song in her heart but with a very adorable and fuzzy tail, an assassin who fears not the night but is terrified of chickens, and a mighty fighter more frightened of her sword than of her chain-mail bikini.

This journey will lead to sinister umlauts, a trash-talking goat, the Dread Necromancer Steve, and a strange and wondrous journey to the most peculiar “happily ever after” that ever once-upon-a-timed.

Audio length: 12 Hours and 38 Minutes

13 pages, Audible Audio

First published July 17, 2018

1431 people are currently reading
14870 people want to read

About the author

Delilah S. Dawson

173 books2,770 followers
Delilah S. Dawson is the New York Times-bestselling author of Star Wars: Phasma, Black Spire: Galaxy's Edge, and The Perfect Weapon. With Kevin Hearne, she writes the Tales of Pell. As Lila Bowen, she writes the Shadow series, beginning with Wake of Vultures. Her other books include the Blud series, the Hit series, and Servants of the Storm.

She's written comics in the worlds of Marvel Action: Spider-Man, Lore's Wellington, Star Wars Adventures, Star Wars Forces of Destiny, The X-Files Case Files, Adventure Time, Rick and Morty, and her creator-owned comics include Star Pig, Ladycastle, and Sparrowhawk.

Find out more at www.whimsydark.com.

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Displaying 1 - 30 of 2,251 reviews
Profile Image for Miranda Reads.
1,765 reviews165k followers
December 9, 2020
description

"I'm a pixie. Name's Staph."
"Staph?"
"That's what I said. I'm here to change your life...The good news and the bad news is that you're the Chosen One."
Young Worstley, a farm boy, gets the surprise of a lifetime when he goes out to feed the animals and returns as the Chosen One (with Gustav the Goat by as his faithful companion).

Being relatively new at this Chosen One schtick, Worstely sets off to find a quest.
Something would go down there soon.
But for now, the lady slept.
And drooled a little, probably.
And soon hears of a sleeping princess in a tower - perfect!

But a Dark Lord, Toby, learns of the new Chosen One and sets a price on his death.
Staph, for all her unpleasentness, was never wrong.
And that meant...there was a Chosen on..
Meanwhile, Fia, a fighter, armed with a bloodthirsty sword and a chain mail bikini (gotta protect the important parts) stumbles (quite literally) upon Westley...mostly killing him.
"Look, you might feel terrible," the goat said, "...but Worstely doesn't or he'd be complaining, believe me."
Guilt ridden, Fia teams up with a nervous bard, Gustav the talking goat, a rather bad assassin and the Dark Lord Toby (interestingly enough) to find a way to bring Worstley back from "mostly" dead in order for him to continue his Chosen One mission.

One thing's for certain, this will be one for the ages!
Have you learned nothing from this journey? Magic is a drug. You can't just go around eating everything that sparkles.
This book ended up being a lot of fun!

It's really heavy on the parody and satire - which is something right up my alley. The absurdity was off the charts.

I quite liked how it played upon the various standards of the genre (i.e. the Chosen One) and completely flipped them (i.e. killing him off almost immediately).

There characters were fun caricatures of the typical folks you would see (dark lord who was an agoraphobia, an assassin who is more likely to kill out of clumsiness, etc).

There was a surprisingly sweet relationship between Fia the fighter and the bunny-bard that really stole the show for me.

Though, I do admit, after around page 200 it did start to get a bit old - it was A LOT of snark jammed in there and it is (contrary to popular belief) possible to overdose on snark.

All in all - this was a fun foray into this subgenre, though I do think I will need a break before I jump into the next one.

Audiobook Comments
Luke Daniels was the narrator and wow. Gold star to him. He went FULL ham on it - all the characters had their own voice, and often over-the-top types of voices. Nicely done Luke!

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Profile Image for Michelle.
147 reviews295 followers
January 15, 2019
I knew that “Kill The Farm Boy” is meant to be a more light-hearted romp of an adventure story, but I really didn't find it engaging. At first I was chuckling, then rolling my eyes, then shaking my head, then getting angry -- until I couldn’t wait to get it over with.

This was advertised as a comic fantasy in the tradition of “The Princess Bride” and the “Discworld”stories, but its humor is nothing like those. The humor attacks rather than amuses, and with long sections of jokes about bodily excretions and masturbation. “Kill the Farm Boy” could have been a clever send up of our favorite fantasy tropes, but instead of lovingly roasting them, they are beaten to death with a heavy hand. There are just too many over the top fantasy tropes constantly under a barrage of puns, stupid language, and flat out being made fun of while also having a not so subtle undercurrent of leftist garbage identity politics being pushed. The same ideas are repeated again and again until you can practically make the joke for the book.

There’s not really much else to say, and I don’t think you’re missing anything if you skip reading this. Shall I discuss the plot? There is none, really--only a flimsy clothesline to link some of the gags; The characters? They are all types or targets, not people; The dialogue? Just mindless drivel mostly consisting of badly strung together sets of low brow puns and jokes.

This was exhausting to read, and I am immensely relieved to be finished and be rid of this book!
Profile Image for Lyn.
2,009 reviews17.6k followers
February 27, 2019
There may be a sub-genre in the fantasy list about parody and satire: turning fairy tales on their backside and having some fun.

Tons o’ fun writers Kevin “I play a druid on TV” Hearne and Delilah Dawson break it all down for us in this 2018 retelling and reimagining of fairy tales. The premise is entertaining enough but the two collaborators make this better with droll word play and double entendres aplenty (and more than a handful of penis jokes – like what I did there?)

This is to the fantasy / fairy tale as Spaceballs is to the Star Wars films, a whimsical but well thought out satire. It also made me think of John Scalzi’s 2011 short story The Shadow War of the Night Dragons, Book One: The Dead City. Prologue. And this leads me to my only criticism: too long.

True, 389 pages is not a lengthy book by most standards, but Scalzi recognized that there is only so much snark you can stretch into an idea, even a good one. Like a funny Saturday Night Live sketch made into a film, there’s just not enough substance to fill it out. This would make a great short work or even a novella but by the end I was ready to be done.

It is funny and overall an enjoyable read from two very talented writers.

Thanks to Netgalley for a free copy of this book that was provided in exchange for an honest review.

description
Profile Image for Tim.
2,497 reviews330 followers
April 14, 2019
Another decent start wasted on the rest of this story. While there are some decent bit parts, it takes a complete story to make a good book and this is far from it. 2 of 10 stars
Profile Image for Kelly (and the Book Boar).
2,819 reviews9,523 followers
September 28, 2018
Find all of my reviews at: http://52bookminimum.blogspot.com/

I’m not even gonna lie and try to say when I first heard of this title, my mind didn’t immediately go . . . .



The book wasn’t afraid to go there as well . . . .

“Worstley is eighteen, white as milk, and tall and strong with wavy blond hair and earnest blue eyes that sparkle with a call to greatness.”

It wasn’t afraid to “kill” him for most of the story either. Which left the remaining ensemble cast to . . . .



And me with a reaction that was more like . . . .



I have to confess that I had to look up Kevin Hearne due to my unfamiliarity with his stuff. I still have no clue who Delilah S. Dawson is. What I do know is this book had some pretty killer swag that I wish I would have been a part of even if the book didn’t end up being a winner for me . . . .



That’s how you do a marketing campaign, kids.

Sadly, though, Kill the Farm Boy ended up being a fail. Not only did it seem to drag on and on without a lot of content to propel it, but apparently I’ve grown too old to endure endless fart and boner jokes. Well, maybe some fart stuff will always be funny . . . .



I wanted Monty Python - I ended up with Van Wilder. And it’s #1 in a series????


Profile Image for Amanda Kratz.
657 reviews51 followers
August 23, 2018
I gave it a good college try but I just couldn’t get through it. DNF @ 54% (and I really pushed myself to make it that far). I never DNF books and I just couldn’t get into this at all.

It is so over the top slapstick humor that it becomes detailed and boring. Yes there are many quips I laughed at and there are some clever jokes to be sure but quantity is not quality. It’s just too much all the time. It’s like watching a never ending episode of a comedy series without the heartfelt moral at the end. I feel the plot really suffered to make way for the jokes.

This is meant to mock and poke fun at every trope in fantasy novels and seriously nothing at all goes the way you would think. It is extremely unpredictable. It very much embraces absurdity, but again it is just too much. I appreciate what it was trying to do but I was just bored and annoyed a bit. The characters all have strange quirks that become the focus of their attention and many conversations revolve around said quirk. Example: The Dark Lord is obsessed with cheese and artisanal crackers, or the clumsy assassin (who falls the moment we meet her) who is terrified of chickens.

Part of me wonders though had this been a TV show or comedy sketch if I would have enjoyed it more. I almost think watching this would have made it more bearable.

Pros:
- The map in the beginning is hilarious and wonderfully drawn.
- Mocking chain mail bikini armor
- Tons of dad humor pun jokes
- Talking animals
- Diversity rep
- Mocking so many known fairy tales/stories. (Seriously I loved trying to figure them all out)
- No tropes (or significant mocking of all tropes)


Cons:
- Too many penis/boob/sex/poop jokes. In particular they really go over board in the elvish land of Morning Wood (go ahead and imagine some jokes- you are right)
- Vocabulary (seriously did they have to use all 365 obscure words from the word of a day calendar. I mean my vocabulary could use a bit of work but geeeze and I was constantly looking things up) Just a few examples: Crepuscular, Piquant, Ungulate, Dyspeptic, Fecund, (if you are able to define any of these words on your own gold star to you)
- Tons of dad humor pun jokes begins to get groan worthy after a while
- Dialogue tends to ramble and go off on weird tangents
- The character quirks take on a life of their own
- Everything about Morningwood


Overall this just wasn’t for me, however people who love mocking fantasy tropes will love this. It is light hearted and fun and jokes aplenty, it just became a chore for me to keep picking it up.
Profile Image for Thea Wilson.
248 reviews80 followers
August 4, 2018
Update 4th August - currently listening to the audiobook of this book now and so far the narration is excellent, just what the book needed!
_____________

Awesome! What a funny book, reading it got me more than a few odd looks from my hubby over my inane giggling bouts while reading. I've not giggled aloud quite so much over a book since I read Tom Holt's Snow White and the Seven Samurai years ago.

Lots of jokes, twists and puns on the fantasy genre and the good old fantasy norms in general made the book so get enjoyable for me along with a good dash of adult humour for good measure along with a great deal of poo jokes! There's nothing that I could claim as off-putting for me this time and although I will acknowledge that others have found problems within the pages I had none of that trouble myself. Any issues with the characters , the prose or the world building (if there were any) were neatly disguised under all the humour, joking and general piss-taking.

Fantastic fun and a fabulous recommendable read for me! Can't wait to see it there's a sequel coming as it will be a definate must read.
Profile Image for Julie.
2,004 reviews630 followers
August 30, 2018
When I heard about this book, I immediately had to read it. I love Kevin Hearne's Iron Druid series. The first book of his new Seven Kennings fantasy series, A Plague of Giants, was an awesome read as well. I like the humor in the Iron Druid series and hoped Kill the Farm Boy would have more of the same. The book blurb invoked Princess Bride, promising humor along the lines of that classic plus Terry Pratchett's Discworld. I jumped right on it....had to read it.

When I read an advanced readers copy, I promise to give an honest review. And I'm going to do just that.

I enjoy Kevin Hearne's books. I've read them all. Look forward to more.

But I didn't like Kill the Farm Boy.

I expected wit, a dash of sarcasm, and irreverent references like Discworld....plus the tongue-in-cheek fairy tale quality of Princess Bride. Afterall, the book blurb did compare this new book to both of those.

But....Kill the Farm Boy is instead filled with lowbrow dick jokes, constant quips about masturbation, farting, poo, boogers.....it's like being dropped into room full of middle schoolers who don't have to watch their language. I found the humor as forced as an Adam Sandler movie. Nothing like Terry Pratchett or William Goldman's Princess Bride.

I read about 75% of the book.....and DNF'd it as unreadable.

Now....this is entirely my opinion. Others might read it and absolutely love it. I did not. I expected more from this book....and it disappointed me. I found the humor forced and juvenile. Not my cup of tea. For me, the plot was also tired and recycled.

This series is just not for me. Moving on. I still love, love, love Kevin Hearne. And I will still be right at the front of the line the next time he has a book come out. I'm not familiar with his co-author on this book -- Delilah Dawson -- but I know she writes humorous, dark fantasy for adults and teens that have received good ratings from reviewers. Like I said....this series is just not for me. I hope others love it, and that they co-author more books to make those readers happy. I, however, am moving on. Not every book is for every person.

**I voluntarily read an advanced readers copy of this book from Random House/Ballentine via NetGalley. All opinions expressed are entirely my own.**
Profile Image for Abi (The Knights Who Say Book).
644 reviews111 followers
June 14, 2018
(4.5 stars) I'll admit, I didn't get into this book at first. There were some funny things about it, but mostly the hype over its humor seemed exaggerated. But then something happened. I believe that something happened around the time we were introduced to Fia, the mighty warrior in bikini armor who has a bloodthirsty sword and accidentally sort of kills the farm boy, but feels very bad about it really.

This book has an amazing cast. Fia, the incredible warrior who just wants to lead a peaceful life (and buy some more functional armor), but keeps stumbling into violence. Argabella, a half-rabbit woman and bard who learns courage and confidence along their quest. Poltro, the terrible rogue, and Toby, the Dark Lord whose magic mostly revolves around carbs. Gustave, a talking goat whose only goals are to eat boots and not be eaten by humans. And Grinda, the sand witch whose vanity hides a fear of vulnerability. The moment this crew starts to come together, everything clicks into place.

The characters are takes on fantasy archetypes yet so much deeper than they appear. I didn't expect the development they go through, and that makes it even better. Sure, there's puns and poop humor and sly winks in the reader's direction, but there's also real heart to the book. And also a strong anti-capitalist message somehow.

I just love the way the book plays with clichés. Every normal fantasy thing is either taken to the extreme or turned on its head. The questing party is mostly women. There are queer women and people of color who don't die. The Chosen One hates being Chosened. And the trolls are trolls in both the modern and fantasy senses of the word. Because of that, the world is both familiar and inventive and a joy to explore.

Another thing I noticed is that the book lets itself relax. It doesn't take itself too seriously, even when delivering a real story. There are little things everywhere that are just there to be funny and expand the world. Not everything is about the plot. The Necromancer Steve isn't really relevant, the book admits, but isn't it fun that everyone hates him? And the book is right. It's hilarious.
Profile Image for Beth.
3,102 reviews301 followers
November 16, 2025
Monty Python meets every fairy tale you could imagine plus some and you've got Kill the Farm Boy. Packed full of slap stick humor, outrageous characters and fairy tale antics to the extreme! Part of me cracked up laughing and part of me was shaking my head at the outlandishness. While reading, I couldn't help but think this book would be perfect for those who love the comedy of SPACE BALLS the movie. It was just a fun, fanciful read.

I received this ARC copy of Kill the Farm Boy from Random House Publishing Group - Ballantine - Del Rey. This is my honest and voluntary review. Kill the Farm Boy is set for publication July 17, 2018.
Profile Image for Marc *Dark Reader with a Thousand Young! Iä!*.
1,507 reviews314 followers
September 13, 2020
An audiobook review by someone who doesn't listen to audiobooks.

Voice actor: Luke Daniels

Pretty funny stuff. It has great fun with common fantasy and D&D tropes. I had several laugh-out-loud moments. But, it's no Terry Pratchett book.

The story builds organically, starting with a standard Chosen One scenario, a status which young farm boy Worstley is surprised to be saddled with (his brother Bestley was unavailable). The boy sets off to find his fortune, and somehow the cast of characters grows into your classic D&D party: Fighter, Rogue, Wizard, Bard, and talking goat.

The book is a little bloated. From the mid-point onwards there was altogether too much character development. What, is that even possible? It is when these moments are bogged down by narration instead of dialogue, and altogether too much explanation instead of demonstration of what the characters are feeling during these little moments. Cutting out a couple of quests and hurrying along the soul-searching a little would have been beneficial, especially when the outcomes of these slow personal transformations were forecast well in advance.

As basically my first audiobook (I tried one nine years ago, listened to during walks with my baby, and frequently having to rewind because of drifting mental attention), a format that is far from my first choice and generally would not fit into my life, it was a must because of a necessary 18-hour solo drive over 2 days. This was one of only a handful of available e-audiobook loans from my public library that remotely interested me. It was an okay experience. I still found my attention drifting at times due to the demands of driving sans collision, but only occasionally did I feel the need to skip back to see what I missed. Usually the story carried on fine even with some partially-missing sections in my attention. Here are my thoughts on the format:
-I have no idea how the characters' names are spelled. This irks me. Will have to look them up.
-There was some language/spelling/word play that made me wonder how it was written out. For example, one character with (per the voice actor) a general Afro-Carribbean accent talked about "killing Biff pronounced 'beef' with an 'i'" which drew a reply like "you killed a cow just by looking at it?" which really makes me want to know if it was written as Beef or Biff or Bif or what. Similar, when demesne was pronounced as duh-mez-knee, was it written phonetically or is the reader just supposed to figure out how the character is saying it based on the reactions?
-I'm sure the book lasted longer than if I read it myself, because of the comical but overdone accents and dramatic reading. I know I can speed it up but for my first time I thought it best to keep it at 1x speed.
-I don't plan to do this again unless I have a similar long drive, and in that case I will plan further ahead for a better selection of titles to my liking.
Profile Image for Erica.
1,472 reviews498 followers
October 22, 2019
A friend picked this ARC up for me awhile ago because she was sure I would be delighted by this wordplayery story.
After I gave up on my other Lunchtime Reading title, I started on this and quickly found I was not delighted.
I made it halfway through but when the dread of having to read this while eating became overbearing, I gave up and called it quits.

It's just too much. I'm a fan of satire and bawdy humor and stupid puns and ridiculous for the sake of ridiculous but you've got to be amazing with words to pull off more than a short story. This is an entire long-ass book of the same jokes being recycled in a myriad of ways, the same display of human foibles from various angles, the same silliness over and over.
It's tedious, overblown, and underfun.
Profile Image for Billie.
930 reviews97 followers
April 15, 2019
A Rogue.
A Bard.
A Warrior.
A Wizard.
A Goat.

Where's the Farm Boy you ask? Well, he's dead, isn't he? Did you not read the title? I mean, maybe he wasn't killed so much as died in a ridiculous and tragic accident involving a tower and a rope of hair and a seven-foot-tall warrior woman falling on him, but dead is dead. And the rest of them are going questing to find the sand witch to see if she can cure his deadness, so it's fine. It'll all be fine.

Filled with puns (not actually a selling point for me) and gleefully skewering every cliche of fantasy/quest fiction (I could almost hear Hearne and Dawson snickering in their tequila as I read), this is a ridiculous romp that combines elements of Monty Python, Terry Pratchett, and even The Princess Bride [which I admit to grudgingly because it is not that book (or movie, if that's your thing), no matter what the Marketing department at Del Rey may want you to think and no matter that the Farm Boy is named Worstley]. It's entertaining and ridiculous and juvenile and obsessed with Wizards and their towers (and other assorted euphemisms and innuendos) and is pretty much the book you want to be reading when the real world is too serious. (Okay, I'd actually recommend The Princess Bride for those times, but if you've already re-read that, this is a good follow-up. Well, maybe after you've re-read a few Discworld novels. And re-watched Monty Python and the Holy Grail. But this should definitely be on the list somewhere.)

Or you could just read the scene with the troll. Especially if you're a woman. Watching the troll get his ass handed to him by a woman of color is very, very satisfying. Every. Time. (Yeah. I may have re-read that scene a few times.)

ETA: I needed a bit of a mental break and so I listened to the audio of this and there are some bits of wordplay and alliteration that are more apparent in the audio than in the written. However, Luke Daniels's voice work for the female characters was straight-up Pythons and it got a bit annoying to me after a while. YMMV.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Briar's Reviews.
2,305 reviews578 followers
May 17, 2020
Kill the Farm Boy is a fantastic mix of two genres: fantasy and comedy.

This book gave me Monty Python and The Princess Bride vibes. It's packed tight with comedy, all the while in a fantasy world.

A magical curse is placed in a far off kingdom, but it's not exactly like the fairy tales suggest. Suddenly, the "Chosen One" is dead and everyone must figure out how in the world they are going to complete the quest. A rabbit girl bard, a talking goat, an evil dark lord and a wicked fighter chick in a chain-mail bikini makes this story quite the tale.

This book is satirical, hilarious and quite the ride. There is constant comedy and action, so I had to put it down a few times or else I'd get burnt out of the constant comedic comments. A lot of the funny tropes of fairy tales is twisted and turned into the funniest possible option. There's also lots of play on words and witty one liners. It's great if you want to chuckle along to something.

I did think the book was a bit too long and that the comedy was getting old. I don't think I could continue this series because of that. The constant comedy is spot on for consistency, but you end up getting tired of it.

Four out of five stars.
Profile Image for ☕️Kimberly  (Caffeinated Reviewer).
3,587 reviews785 followers
July 19, 2018
First, I must give Luke Daniels the narrator of this tale accolades. Bravo! How did you not burst out laughing every five minutes?  Daniels range of voices and ability to deliver this tongue-in-cheek tale was brilliant. He brought the humor up a notch and endeared me to these odd characters. Now, please share the bloopers and outtakes!

You might like Kill the Farm Boy if:

You enjoy puns, slapstick humor and excessive talks of poo, phalluses, and cheese. Both Hearne and Delilah are known for their humor and nods to fandoms in their writing but here it's no holds barred. Puns, parodies and spoofs abound. For example, the elvish village of "Morning Wood" and the lavish descriptions of food! If euphemisms and innuendos aren't your thing, you might want to pass.
You know your fairy tales and will recognize and appreciate the nods and parodies contained within the kingdom of Pell.  You will find Sleeping Beauty, Rapunzel,  and the Princess Bride to name a few weaved into this story. I found these bits entertaining and laughed aloud more than once.
You're not planning on devouring this in a few sittings. Usually with Hearne and Daniels' audiobooks I jump in and devour them in a day or two. It took me a  week to listen to Kill the Farm Boy. When I listened in smaller takes, I enjoyed the humor more. It's over the top and sometimes borders on ridiculous. When I listened for longer lengths, I got distracted or missed more subtle references. So pacing is everything to appreciate all the mentions, puns and spoofs.
You love unusual characters with odd quirks. An unlikely group of companions begin a quest to save a dead farm boy. The tale begins when a young farm boy, named Worstly, learns he is the chosen one. Gustave, a talking goat, is his companion.  As Worstly sets out to fulfill his destiny Gustav berates him. Fia, a seven-foot warrior wearing the most unusual chain-mail carries an enchanted sword whose bloodthirsty she must control. Fia accidently kills the farm boy and thus our tale begins. Argabella, the half-rabbit half-woman bard joins them, long with Toby, the carb eating, Dark Lord who craves artisan crackers. Rounding out the group is Poltro, a pitiful rogue who is afraid of chickens and Grinda the sand witch who is plagued with issues.  Then we have secondary characters like Staph the fairy whose wand is covered in flem and Steve the Necromancer who everyone hates.  I liked that the cast was largely made up of women and Pell offers a diverse landscape.
You can see past the slapstick humor and appreciate the character growth and complexity of the story. Jokes, and innuendos aside, the story is well-developed and clever. Strengthened by their companions we witness individual growth and friendships.
You want to see every element of fairy tales and fantasy turned on its head. Honestly, I think they hit every one!
You long to see a Troll get his ass handed to him.
This review was originally posted at Caffeinated Reviewer
Profile Image for Whitley Birks.
294 reviews362 followers
dnf
July 8, 2018
I requested the book on the strength of Princess Bride comparisons, which seem to have since been removed? Well, this is a hard one for me to review, because it's just not what I expected and the sales pitch I got is gone now, so...

The humor in this is very much not in line with my own, tending on the side of 'throw everything at the wall and see what sticks.' There's a heap of anachronisms, because....IDK, "just mention something modern, it worked for Robin Williams"? The attempts to mock fantasy tropes mostly just say something snarky and then continue using the tropes anyway. It all feels...very surface level, not terribly engaged with the material.

Princess Bride felt like it loved fantasy romance and engaged with fantasy romance even while it parodied that genre gently. This book...wears fantasy like a coat and thinks that counts as funny.
Profile Image for Little Timmy.
7,391 reviews59 followers
January 28, 2020
I LOVE Kevin Hearne's Iron Druid series, they are some of my top favorite books. I was looking forward to seeing what he did with a new series, even with a co-author. I am not sure if it is the co-authoring that didn't do it for me but I really could not get into this book. The Iron Druid books have humor and satire scattered through them but it is an accent to the plot. This book seemed to only be strings of satire and quips strung together to tray and make a plot of them. I won't be trying the rest of the trilogy. Not recommended
Profile Image for jess ~has abandoned GR~.
556 reviews116 followers
quit-reading
June 30, 2018
Here goes a positive review for a book that I did not finish.

Doesn't appeal to my sense of humor, oddly enough, considering Mr Hearne's other works are some of my favorite in the genre. I'm the one person is the world who finds puns irritating -- it's lonely out here.

If you enjoy puns, double entendres, flowery-but-silly writing (imagine the narrator of Amelie or Pushing Daisies), jokes that go on a little too long (imagine Family Guy) or buddy-comedies, then this is the book for you.

But, alas, it was not the book for me. Not every book that exists has to cater to me.

If you, too, find that this book wasn't for you, please try another series by Kevin Hearne -- I bet you may just love it.

Hounded - an urban fantasy with a brave hero and his delightful talking dog
A Plague of Giants - an epic fantasy told from multiple viewpoints
Profile Image for The Captain.
1,521 reviews522 followers
July 17, 2018
Ahoy there me mateys!  I received this fantasy eARC from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. So here be me honest musings . . .

I so wanted to like this book and here I be abandoning ship.  Sigh.  This book has a gorgeous cover and wonderful blurb.  The cover says it has puns.  I thought it was going to be a clever topsy-turvy take on fairy tales.  It had a few potentially fun characters like a talking goat and a bikini chain mail clad giantess but was too shallow in writing style to make me care about them.  I liked what happens to the Chosen One in the beginning and was curious how that would work out.  But the humor was certainly not to me taste and the plot was practically non-existent.  The jokes were basically all potty-humor and genitalia based.  A little bit of that would have been fine but I got tired of readin' words like poo and pellet over and over again.  The plot meandered in way that was boring.  A seemingly entertaining world underlies the book but there was no depth to be had.  I gave up at 20%.  I guess ye can't win them all.

So lastly . . .

Thank you Random House Publishing Group – Ballantine Del Ray!
Profile Image for Kira.
1,292 reviews139 followers
July 15, 2018
The first third of this was hysterical. I was reading it at work and had to stop because it was too hard to refrain from laughing out loud. After that the humor fizzled out. It was still funny but only every once and a while. The journey they were on took way too long. A lot of it was just nonsense, so it would have been better if the book were a little shorter. None of the characters were particularly interesting. For the ones I did like my interest waned as the book went on. The end wasn't bad but it wasn't good either. It was a long journey toward nothing.

I received this from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.
Profile Image for Dianne.
6,815 reviews632 followers
June 14, 2018
My Rating: 3.5 Stars

Strap yourself in, make sure your sense of humor is safely nestled in the crook of your arm, this nonstop ride is about to leave the station without nary a rest stop in between, which may or may not be necessary, depending on how well you can hold your puns.

Delilah S. Dawson and Kevin Ahearne are running an author tag team with satire fantasy and the quips are flowing like a chocolate fountain at the All-You-Can-Eat buffet. KILL THE FARM BOY leaves no stone unturned when it comes to tongue-in-cheek, off-the-wall storytelling and it all began with a quest…but so does every fantasy. And that where this one veers far off the beaten path…

Loads of laughs, tons of fun and with a cast of the most unlikely heroes and villains ever, the land of Pell makes an hour in the Funhouse mirror maze seem absolutely dull.

That said, perhaps best read in doses to avoid “quirk” overload, this tale sometimes gets to be juuuuusssst a little too much, too often and loses that “riding the edge” of hilarity and entertainment feel!

I received a complimentary ARC edition from Del Ray!

Series: The Tales of Pell - Book 1
Publisher: Del Rey
Publication Date: July 17, 2018
Genre: Fantasy | Comedy
Hardcover: 384 pages
Available from: Amazon | Barnes & Noble
For Reviews, Giveaways, Fabulous Book News, follow: http://tometender.blogspot.com
Profile Image for bittertea.
195 reviews14 followers
Read
October 1, 2018
DNF after 15 pages, so I’m not leaving a rating. I wanted to give it more of a chance but at this point the tone & style are pretty well established and I know it’s not for me. The ‘humor’ of this book has consisted so far of jokes about poop, farts, boogers, a fairy who doesn’t bathe, and a dark lord who yells about crackers while trying to force a hedgehog and a turtle to mate. I maybe would’ve found this funny when I was ten? (Maybe.) Subverting fantasy tropes in a funny way is a fine idea, but it’s been done before and better.
Profile Image for Char.
1,949 reviews1,873 followers
dreaded-dnf
June 20, 2019
I downloaded this audio from my local library, but it's just not working for me. DNF, no rating.
Profile Image for Susan Hamm.
1 review18 followers
March 8, 2018
I received free books from Penguin Random House in exchange for this review... (at Emerald City Comic Con... I also met the authors and they seem like pretty awesome folks)

This is more 4.5 stars than 4 but I can't figure out how to do half stars. I'm a huge fan of Discworld, Princess Bride and anything that plays with or satirizes fantasy tropes, and this fits the bill perfectly. The title pulled me in immediately, and if that wasn't enough, I laughed out loud at the map in front (their version of the standard "this is your fantasy world" map in all the best fantasy books). I also chuckled at the entire table of contents. It's not as subtle as Discworld, but it's still highly enjoyable and laugh out loud funny at times.

All the main characters turned tropes on their heads, some in ways more obvious than others, and the story followed many of the standard lines while throwing in enough surprises to keep things interesting. The book definitely met its goal of skewering the old "generic white male chosen one comes up from nothing and gets control of the land just because some all powerful being told him he was a special snowflake" trope (I particularly liked Fia's confrontation with the troll).

The only problem I had was that sometimes I felt like I wanted more details. Some sections of the journey were covered with the standard "and then the next morning all the arrangements were taken care of", and I wouldn't have minded some more fleshing out, but that's fairly minor. (I could've spent an entire book with the warrior and the bard. their story and the nature of their relationship was a pleasant surprise, and ended up being my favorite part of the book).

Anyway, I highly recommend this to anyone who loves the fantasy genre but rolls their eyes at fantasy tropes. I can only hope that the authors (and there are two, I don't know why Goodreads only lists Kevin Hearne, when Delilah S. Dawson co-wrote it... maybe it'll be fixed by the time the book comes out) continue the series, because there is definitely potential here for a lot more fun.

(and a slight warning: I enjoyed the puns, but I know some people aren't as in to morningwood jokes and might be somewhat wary of all that... there are more than a few of those kinds of puns, but I thought they were handled pretty tastefully. In my opinion, they were funny without being completely crude, but your mileage may vary)
Profile Image for Sud666.
2,330 reviews199 followers
April 14, 2019
Ugh. I just couldn't do it. I rarely DNF a book. While this is not awful, it's borderline cringe-worthy. I also have a good sense of humor, albeit dry. From "Hitchhiker's Guide" to "Good Omens"..hell even "Jig the Dragonslayer" show my ability to appreciate a funny story. But this? I sat through a 100 pages...trying hard to like it more..but the paragraph that administered the coup de grace to my desire was this:

".....I am known by many names, some of them intended to be less than kind. Nostrildamus is a favorite of the local assoreted cretins, as is Nebuchadnoser, Noseph of Nosareth, Nosy McHonker, Booger Mc Schnozz, Beaky McSnotlocker, and Lord Sneeze. But my given name is Ol'Faktri....."

Jesus H. Christ. If that previous paragraph made you giggle or snicker then this book is for you. Me? I read that, sighed and then stared at my pile of really, really good books on my currently reading list that I would rather read than this sophomoric work. I'll pass....there is better shit to read.
Profile Image for Trike.
1,973 reviews188 followers
May 10, 2021
This story is a 2-star read for me because the humor is so juvenile and, at times, crass, but the narration by Luke Daniels is *spectacular*. His voices and accents and performance are hilarious and really elevate the comedy beyond what it deserves, almost earning this a three star rating. I’m going to seek out other books he’s read. If he can make this immature silliness entertaining then he’d really shine with material aimed at people older than 12.
Profile Image for Douglas Meeks.
893 reviews238 followers
July 17, 2018
Giving this a 3 Star rating was a near thing and VERY subjective. This is a story that steals pieces from every fairy tale you ever heard (and a few you never heard) then throws in a basic plot that is some twisted version of "Lord of the Rings" and "The Princess Bride" which was entertaining a bit but the juvenile humor and at times just plain crude telling of the story wore thin.

While you can comfortably read this as a stand along, there are a few threads left to pursue in the next book since this is being offered as book #1 in "The Tales Of Pell".

It is very original, it gets close to serious at times but mainly it just subtly makes fun of stories we all have heard and loved plus this sentence in the author notes at the end may prevent me from bothering with any more books since "it was time to make fun of white male power fantasies" which would account for pretty much every male in this book being horribly stupid except for the goat.

I tire of racial labels and authors who feel they have to put their labels and small minds to work "educating" the rest of us. So 3 very reluctant Stars and at this writing the price must be a horrible joke at $14 which if I used price in writing a review would drop this to 2 or less stars. Depending on your sense of humor this will be funny or just an exercise in stupidity and silliness. If it is silly then you will find this about a 2 Star reading but in any case, the local library might be the best source for this book.
Profile Image for Athena (OneReadingNurse).
971 reviews140 followers
February 24, 2019
"RESPECT THE UMLAUT!"

This fantasy quest parody is something like South Park meets Monty Python, on Viagra. Is that fair? It was extremely ... Punny. The map is hilarious. They poke fun of all the tropes imaginable. The book was even exciting until about 55%.

And then - I don't know what happened but they completely lost me after the umlaut scene.

The characters and their names are all parodies of something or some trope. The dark lord Toby might have been my favorite character. Argabella ended up being a bit of a hidden hero.

The chapter names were 100% the best part: example: Uncomfortably Near A Giant Uvula. Or "In the Tower of Toby, the Dark Lord, He Who Dreams of Artisanal Crackers."

I apologize for not writing a decent review, but I just don't have intelligent thoughts on this book. They had me crying I was laughing so hard, then it stopped being amusing. I skimmed most of the last 40% 😭

And now I am going to start working on book 2, because I received the eARC. Honestly I would probably at least attempt to read book 2 anyway.

I would recommend this for Monty Python type fans
Profile Image for Lauren Stoolfire.
4,776 reviews297 followers
June 5, 2019
I don't know about you, but I thought that Kill the Farm Boy by Delilah S. Dawson and Kevin Hearne was absolutely hilarious. I love the styles of both authors, and for the most part this series opener checked almost all the right boxes for me. I have a feeling you'll love this if you're a fan of Terry Pratchett's Discworld, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, and The Princess Bride.

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