Overcoming Perfectionism: A Self-Help Guide Using Cognitive Behavioural Techniques

by Roz Shafran, Dr.Sarah Egan, Tracey Wade

How to break the circle of 'never good enough'

Striving for something can be a healthy and positive attribute; it's good to aim high. But sometimes whatever we do just isn't good enough; we want to be too perfect and start setting unrealistic goals.

Such high levels of perfectionism, often driven by low self-esteem, can turn against success and develop into unhealthy obsession, triggering serious mental-health problems, such as anxiety, depression and eating disorders. Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), on which this self-help book is based, has been found to be a highly effective treatment and provides relief from that disabling sense of not being good enough.

In this essential self-help guide, you will learn:

- How clinical perfectionism manifests itself
- Effective coping strategies with invaluable guidance on how to avoid future relapse

OVERCOMING self-help guides use clinically-proven techniques to treat long-standing and disabling conditions, both psychological and physical. Many guides in the Overcoming series are recommended under the Reading Well Books on Prescription scheme.

Series Editor: Professor Peter Cooper

Genres: Psychology, Self Help, Nonfiction, Ebooks, Personal Development, Mental Health

448 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2013

Reviews

[نرگس پ · Rating 4 out of 5]

خب من این رو به پیشنهاد دکترم خوندم. من خیلی به این چیزای روانشناسی و اینا بدبینم. ولی این از اون کتابای الکی نبود که باید خودتون بخواید تا خوشحال باشید. یه سری نکته رو مطرح می کرد و اونا رو می ذاشت برعهده ی خواننده که خودش امتحان کنه و ببینه روش جواب می ده یا نه. من همه تمرین هایی که گفته بود رو انجام ندادم چون در شرایط مناسبی برای تغییر زیاد یهویی نیستم اما یه سریا که انجام دادم نتیجه مثبتی داشته هرچند حداقلی.
به طور کلی می خوام کتاب رو دم دستم نگه دارم و هروقت افکار کمال گرایانه م زیاد شدن بهش مراجعه کنم چون این یه پروسه ست و به هر حال باید باهاش مقابله کنم. نوشتن این ریویو هم نوعی تمرین بود که بگم هی من این مشکل رو دارم و عیبی نداره.
اگه کسی خودش رو کمال گرا می دونه و فکر می کنه این قضیه براش مشکل ایجاد کرده قطعا این رو پیشنهاد می کنم بخونه چون کتاب خودیار آسون و خوبیه.

[Paçimuçka · Rating 3 out of 5]

Overcoming Perfectionism is an overall good,but repetitive and a little bit unpractical book. The content, the roots of perfectionism, what feeds it etc. are very helpful to understand your own ideas and actions. However many sentences and arguments repeat in nearly every chapter, at some point it gets boring to read the same thing over and over again. Also, the worksheets and exercises are unpractical because many of them requires immediate action, like, you have to write them down as soon as it happens but how? Am I supposed to write down every single thing I do? Unpractical.
I'd recommend this book only because I haven't read anything better about the same topic.

[Naila · Rating 4 out of 5]

Sebagai seseorang yang sering merasa sedih ketika apa yang aku lakukan kurang memuaskan menurutku pribadi, buku ini cukup menarik. Lewat buku ini aku menjadi tahu apakah aku termasuk seseorang yang perfectionist atau tidak. Buku ini bersifat interaktif karena tidak hanya berisi tentang teori, namun juga berisi banyak pertanyaan atau jurnal yang bisa diisi. Dan aku bisa membaca buku ini lagi di lain waktu di momen tertentu~

[Maryam · Rating 3 out of 5]

Well, even with all the time I took, I still didn't finish it. I think of it as a book that can give you the general concept on overcoming perfectionism. I felt like it could be more practical, with more practices, and with a more detailed and -well, practical- description.

[Sharice · Rating 4 out of 5]

The self-help techniques in this book have taken me just under a year to complete. I initially started reading the book and then found myself procrastinating about the exercises (classic perfectionist behaviour!) I have found the boom useful on the whole, although some of the exercises just didn’t work for me. What I have appreciated the most is just realising how much of my life has been affected by perfectionism. I can’t say this book has “cured” me but it definitely has been food for thought.

[Sajjad]

کتاب بسیار خوبی
منتها در زمره کتابهای عملی ! یعنی شما برای اینکه تغییری در رفتارتون رخ بده باید جدو.ل و فرمهای که داده رو تکمیل کنید
اما اطلاعات جالبی داره ، مثلا اینکه کمال گرایی با اختلال وسواس و اضظراب اجتماعی در رابطه اس
و البته افراد کمال خواه ممکنه درگیر رفتارهای مخربی مثل اجتناب کاری و اهمال کاری بشن که فهمیدم مشکل من از این دسته اس

[Mohammad Varzandeh · Rating 3 out of 5]

I think the writer is also suffering from perfectionism! Plenty of tables and instructions is confusable!

[Riccardo · Rating 3 out of 5]

Perfectionism is a common feature of an array of disorders- eating disorders, anxiety disorders, OCD and OCPD. Cognitive behavioral theory sees it as being characterized by various cognitive distortions. The book gives a reasonable summary of CBT theory and treatment. It is somewhat dry as far as personal development books, but I guess CBT always is. Probably worth a read but don't expect to stay awake.

[Hicasliyok · Rating 3 out of 5]

I dont think that this book helped for overcoming me but it helped for recognizing the perfectionism.

[Brittany · Rating 5 out of 5]

A great primer on perfectionism with some worthwhile advice. If you think you might be a perfectionist and want to find out more, this is the place to start!

[Maedeh Mehry · Rating 5 out of 5]

نجات‌دهنده‌ی آدم‌هایی که کمالگرایی، افسرده و مضطربشون کرده. این کتاب شفا میده.

[Alan Hamilton · Rating 5 out of 5]

An excellent definition of the causes of perfectionism with some very useful exercises that force you to really think about the subject. The bottom line is that you have to spend time working through the exercises to get the benefit - there are no shortcuts!
As a result, it’s not the kind of book that you just dip in and out of.

[Kevin Zhang · Rating 4 out of 5]

I got bored in the middle. But overall this is a helpful and easy read. It is a remainder of the obvious things we could do for ourselves that we have forgotten about with our overwhelming daily lives. Always remember to encourage yourself and be flexible with your thoughts and beliefs.

[Nadia Sotnikova · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'm new to CBT, so it was a good intro with lots of exercises to help me start working through my perfectionism problems.

[Shirin Abdel Rahman · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very useful book.

[Behnoud · Rating 3 out of 5]

It was helpful.

[Lee D · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not perfect, but a useful, relatable tool, which would be good as an ongoing reference point.

[Paige · Rating 4 out of 5]

Practical and straightforward CBT approach. I think it would be difficult to implement this without therapy or some other support.

[Anissa Rezy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Another overcoming series. I'll use some worksheet to help my clients

[Fatemeh Maleki]

در واقع من ۵۰ درصد کتاب رو خوندم و احتمالا ادامه اش رو بعدا میخونم کتاب خوبی بود به همرا کتاب و جلسات درمانی تا حد قابل قبولی کمال گراییم رو کنترل کردم.

[Sambasivan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Short and practical book. Procrastination and perfectionism go hand in hand. You need to find the balance between the two. Scientifically approved suggestions. Well structured ideas. Go for it.

[Mickey · Rating 4 out of 5]

Helpful paradigms to approach situations.

[Belle · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this book along with therapy and boy did it help. I didn’t understand that what I had was an actual issue you could understand as it’s own science. It takes you through not only what perfectionism is (in its many facets) but what perpetuates it. It’s not really concerned with how it is caused because, as it says in the book, you do not need to know the cause to find a solution. But does offer some suggestions. The thickness is intimidating but I’m finding it so useful to help me understand what is happening with me and also how to work through it. I only picked this one because it was backed with rigorous empirical evidence. Could not be more grateful for this book.

[Bahare · Rating 3 out of 5]

معمولی بود
برای کمالخواهی من که آنچنان کمکی نکرد:/

[Morteza · Rating 4 out of 5]

It gave me a good toolkit

[Maryam]

آقا من اینو از طاقچه خوندم فقط ۵۲ صفحه داشت مشکوک شدم. چرا اینقدر کمتره؟

[Nynke]

quite repetitive