The Empathy Effect: Seven Neuroscience-Based Keys for Transforming the Way We Live, Love, Work, and Connect Across Differences

by Helen Riess, Liz Neporent, Alan Alda (Foreword)

“We are all connected on a neurobiological level far more than we have previously realized. Consciously or not, we are in constant, natural resonance with one another’s feelings. When we are engaged in shared mind awareness, the possibilities for mutual aid and collaborative problem solving abound.”—Helen Riess, MDA Revolutionary Guide for Understanding and Changing the Way We ConnectEmpathy is undergoing a new evolution. In a global and interconnected culture, we can no longer afford to identify only with people who seem to be a part of our “tribe.” As Dr. Helen Riess has learned, our capacity for empathy is not just an innate trait—it is also a skill that we can learn and expand. With The Empathy Effect, Dr. Riess presents a definitive resource on the science behind how it works, new research on how empathy develops from birth to adulthood, and tools for building your capacity to create authentic emotional connection with others in any situation.Dr. Riess emerged as leading researcher on empathy by creating a breakthrough training curriculum now used internationally in health care, business, and education. Drawing from this successful program and the latest science, she • The E.M.P.A.T.H.Y.® method—a powerful seven-step system for understanding and increasing empathy, starting with Eye Contact and ending with Your Response• How empathy works—a comprehensive synthesis emerging from neuroscience, sociology, developmental psychology, and evolutionary theory• Tools for recognizing and promoting empathic behavior in yourself and others• Parenting and teaching empathy in kids—guidance for every stage of development• Texts, emojis, and digital empathy—the modern challenge of authentic connection in the information age• Empathy through art and literature—exploring the power of creative expression to expand our emotional experience• Leading with empathy—how political and business leaders can combine compassion with efficiency through group empathy skills and shared mind intelligence• Digging deep for empathy—how to reverse scapegoating and recognize shared humanity with those we normally keep at a distance• Self-compassion—why your ability to express love toward yourself affects every other relationship in your life“Nourishing empathy lets us help not just ourselves,” says Dr. Riess, “but also everyone we interact with, whether for a moment or a lifetime.” The Empathy Effect is a life-changing book that will revolutionize the way you understand yourself, relate to your loved ones, and connect to every person in your life.

Genres: Psychology, Nonfiction, Self Help, Science, Neuroscience, Leadership, Relationships

232 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 1, 2018

Reviews

[Jenn "JR" · Rating 5 out of 5]

A very thorough and enjoyable read that thoroughly covers many aspects of empathy, though the writing can be a bit rambling and overly conversational, which had merits – I stopped more frequently to digest the material than I would with a more structured writing style (and it took me much longer to read this book as a result).

The book begins with an overview of empathy as a term and dives deep into the neuroscience behind this hard-wired human trait. Empathy allows us to not just acknowledge/validate (sympathize) with someone else’s feelings, but to feel what they are feeling and relate to the experience of another person. The authors briefly touch on true empathy and misplaced or sham empathy, as well (ie, helicopter parents who are unable to bear any expression of perceived discomfort of their children).

Early in the book, we are presented with a 7-point tool for developing better empathy, called “E.M.P.A.T.H.Y.”

E for eye contact
M for muscle facial expression
P for posture
A for affect (emotions)
T for tone of voice
H for hearing the whole person
Y for your response

“With deep empathic listening comes an empathic response that starts on a physiological level because of our shared brain activity.”

This tool was tested out on physicians to help them better relate to patients and understand not just the “complaint” but the “concern” – resulting in greater patient satisfaction as well as more effective treatment by the physician.

The authors dive into childhood cognitive development and empathy, discuss parenting and empathy and the ways that parents provide a “mirror” to help children develop empathy and form secure attachments. Empathy in education is discussed – using as a case a “last resort” high school where staff are directed to use empathy and compassion, and failing or delinquent students are “punished” with study hall, counseling and support services. This made me consider the style of education in my experience where corporal punishment in the form of detention hall (sit straight, eyes forward, no sleeping, no eating, no talking, no moving, no studying/reading) was the first response to any infraction.

Learning and educational methods are critical for teenagers who learn best from “Project based learning” -- a great place to learn to collaborate, form relationships and absorb information by directly doing things. This leads into a discussion around the ways that new technologies – esp cell phones, Internet use – are changing our brains by developing habits that tap into primal responses and keeping us from being able to develop deeper relationships by depriving us of access to the emotional context of our interactions.

The authors also devote a substantial portion of the book to discussing the role of literature and art in providing opportunity for people to interpret and project what the artist (or subjects of the work) were thinking or feeling. “Art is incomplete without the perceptual and emotional involvement of the viewer.” Art allows (or even requires) us to move out of our own perspectives and open to other ways of perceiving or seeing the world.

“The power of art lies in its ability to stimulate both cognitive (thinking) and affective (feeling) empathy.”

From here, the authors examine leadership – and the ways that empathic leadership can change the brain chemistry of leaders and followers via an “interconnectedness of thoughts and feelings” that establishes a “social intelligence.” A good leader is pays attention to the health of her relationships with his constituents/followers and is able to create bonds that underlie a culture of trust and collaboration. Empathy is critical to this process.

There’s a bit of a ramble about the 2016 presidential election and the problems created and expressed by both major party candidates that resulted in manipulation into a false “in-group” and a sense of exclusion on either side. The remainder of the book reviews different responses to “out group” types, including homeless, the mentally ill, substance abusers, LGBTQ folks, etc.

The important takeaway here is that those times when you feel the least empathetic are critically important for you to be empathetic – and requires self-awareness, impulse control and self-examination feelings to determine what is blocking an empathic response.

Finally, there’s an entire chapter on self-empathy and mindfulness and the importance of this as a reflection on how you treat others. You treat others as you treat yourself – if you listen to the chatter in your brain (not all your thoughts are you) and have a harsh inner critic, that will result in similar approach or responses to others. From self-kindness springs empathy for others. This is an excellent lesson to keep!

NOTE: I received an advanced reader copy of this book from NetGalley.

[Ell · Rating 5 out of 5]

Five stars! What more can I say? This book is informational, educational, rooted in scientific research and sorely needed! In a perfect world, health care professionals and educators would read this book and pass the knowledge on to their colleagues and students. As someone who has suffered empathy-burnout in the past and as a natural born advocate, I benefited greatly by reading this book. It was interesting, engaging and empowering.

[Literary Redhead · Rating 4 out of 5]

The author, an associate clinical professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, shares the seven keys of her globally-renown neuroscience-based program for strengthening empathy. An important work in a world where our differences, rather than our human connectedness, are often emphasized to grave detriment. Highly recommended.

Pub Date 27 Nov 2018

Thanks to the author, publisher and NetGalley for the review copy. Opinions are mine. #TheEmpathyEffect #NetGalley

[Sagnik Reads Roy · Rating 4 out of 5]

In The Empathy Effect: 7 Neuroscience-Based Keys for Transforming the Way We Live, Love, Work, and Connect Across Differences, Harvard Medical School psychiatrist Dr. Helen Riess shares 7 simple tips to improve your empathy and reap the rewards of the empathy effect.Empathy improves our ability to perceive, understand, ‘diagnose’ and ‘prescribe’ help to people.

"All people are a part of the fabric of humanity"
Helen Riess.

If you have read and liked the book
'Empathy: Why It Matters, and How to Get It' by Roman Krznaric,
then I hope you guys are going to probably love this book,The Empathy Effect.

In Conclusion, The Empathy Effect is a refreshing read that champions human-centricity.

[Żetka · Rating 4 out of 5]

3,75

[D.B. Moone · Rating 5 out of 5]

Authors: Helen Rises, MD and, Liz Neporent

Foreword by Alan Alda

Publisher: Sounds True Publishing

Genres: Self-Help: Emotions & Interpersonal Relations, Mental Health: Emotions

Page Count: 240 pages (Available in Hardback and Kindle)

ISBN-10: 1683640284

ISBN-13: 978-1683640288

Publication Date: November 27, 2018

Pre-order Now From Amazon, Sounds True, Barnes & Noble, Books-A-Million, IndieBound, or your favorite bookstore.

My Rating: 5 Stars

About the Authors: (From Publishers Page)

HELEN RIESS, MD, is the associate clinical professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School. Her work has been featured in the New York Times, HuffPost, JAMA, and more. She lives in Boston, Massachusetts. For more, visit empathetics.com.

Social Media Sites: Empathetics Website, Helen Riess MD Twitter, Empathetics Facebook, Empathetics YouTube, The power of empathy: Helen Riess at TEDxMiddlebury

LIZ NEPORENT is an award-winning health and medical journalist and is currently a managing editor at Medscape/WebMD. She lives in New York City and upstate New York. For more, visit liznep.com.

Social Media Sites: LiZ Neporent Website, Liz Neporent Twitter, Liz Neporent Facebook

Description of The Empathy Effect from the Publisher:

“Empathy is undergoing a new evolution. In a global and interconnected culture, we can no longer afford to identify only with people who seem to be a part of our “tribe.” As Dr. Helen Riess of Harvard Medical School has learned, our capacity for empathy is not just an innate trait—it is also a skill that we can learn and expand. With The Empathy Effect, the leading researcher presents a groundbreaking teaching book to help us learn essential skills for transforming the way we relate to others in any situation.

“Nourishing empathy lets us help not just ourselves,” says Dr. Riess, “but also everyone we interact with, whether for a moment or a lifetime.” Drawing from her empathy training curricula now used internationally in health care, business, and education, she takes us step by step through her EMPATHY program. Here you’ll learn to enhance empathic behavior in yourself and others; recognize and reverse dehumanization and scapegoating tactics; practice empathy at work, home, and in everyday settings; discover ways to build empathy in groups and leadership positions; and much more.”

My Review:

When I started reading The Empathy Effect it did not take long for me to realize I was gulping every word like someone who was on the verge of starvation. My first thought was “I don’t want to write a book review, I want to have a conversation with Dr. Riess and Liz Neporent.” Having Alan Alda in the conversation would have been nice, but that would have been risky, particularly if I found myself starstruck and distracted from the conversation I wanted to have. However, the book review must be written.

Please don’t ask me who Alan Alda is. “If you do not know who Alan Alda is, ask Siri, Google, ask your parents or your grandparents. I highlighted this for a reason, but I will come back to this later.

I had four books to review and I purposely elected to read The Empathy Effect last as I assumed since it had written by a scientist, I was going to have to feed my brain well before taking this book on. I’ve never been more wrong about anything in my life. Initially, Dr. Riess talks about applying the 7 Neuroscience-Based Keys to the doctor and patient relationship, or encounter. But as I often do, I got ahead of myself in my head and found myself thinking out loud, “These 7 Neuroscience-Based Keys can be applied to all human interactions in life, not solely to the doctor-patient connections,” but remember, I was gulping the book and getting ahead of myself.


For the complete review, please visit www.dbmoone.com. Thank you.

[Hendrik Strauss · Rating 3 out of 5]

Had some very interesting chapters and it did deepen my awareness of empathy in many facetts of life.
3,5 stars from me. Kind of conflicted because this book is really good, just a lil shallow in the depths sometimes but makes up for it with a very broad perspective. Could be 4 stars if I werent such a grumpy nerd.

I especially liked the chapter on art and empathy. At other times, for example in chapter 7 about education and empathy, the book seemed to say: empathy is important and should be important for teachers too without detailing precisely how to do that in a much more deep sense than(i am paraphrasing) "They should think about some factors that also happen in the childrens life like they could be hungry. Schools should give out free lunchess". True and important but when it goes on how teachers might teach empathy it does not really go beyond "They could sit in a circle and talk about their feelings to prevent bullying".

Dont get me wrong, there is plenty of information on how to be more empathic and it was truly a joy and a privilege to experience this as an audiobook.
But sometimes I couldnt help but feel that there was much more ground that could have been covered in any given subject. And instead on really kneeling down on psychological/ brain mechanisms every chapter was about a different branche of life where empathy is important. There are examples interwoven which give the ability to learn from in those chapters but chapter 4 alone does nearly all of the explainatory work and is constantly refered back. Explainations which could have been detailed are explained in a way that one could complete reading in a matter of minutes. Which is great if compactness is what you are looking for.

Neuroscience was mentioned around 5-7 times and in a very broad sense most often. Nothing someone in the field could really use. Even when it was clear that the author knew more about what was happening.
I like it when a book gives different levels of explaination for different readers which sum up the point at the beginning and then detailing why that is so and which findings report it to be the case and how.
Maybe Riess wanted to write understandably for a non specialist audience without prior knowledge.
But honestly I would have appreciated to hear at least some broad term like temporal cortex instead of "some location in the brain". This could be a propblem only for audiobook listeners experience as I am guessing Riess has cited and thus refered to the studies she utilizes.

I had high hopes and the book is too well written to leave me with a sense of disapointment, yet it seems to me like there is much more to say about a subject this central to the human condition.
If you are interested in the topic and need some starting point, this is a great starting point. But for understanding empathy in scientific terms my research will go on.

[Ann T]

Thank you Sounds True Publishing and Netgalley for this ARC in return for my honest review.

This was an easy to read, highly engaging book on a fascinating subject. I was really interested to learn more about empathy, particularly the different ways empathy can present and then differentiations between these.

If you are looking for an easy to understand, informative book without the dryness often found in books on similar subjectsm this is your book.

Thank you for the opportunity to read and review this great book.

[Audrey Stars in Her Eye · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed The Empathy Effect. As someone with chronic illness, I see a lot of doctors. To know that someone is out there helping doctors empathizer with their patients, it lifts my heart and gives me hope that we will received betters care.
Helen Riess tells you how she does this with her E.M.P.A.T.H.Y. project. To understand her method, you have to understand empathy on a physiological. and psychological level. The book lays these out in a very easy to understand way. I didn't feel like I was slogging through a medical journal. Riess also explains how these affect our everyday life looking at relationships as well as politics. (While, she had a great position explaining how 2016 worked politically, sans Bernie Sanders, I am so sick of everything I read brining it in. I get enough of it everyday in the news and life.)
In the end, it's easy to see the technique can help anyone who works people connect with their clients or patients. I feel very positive knowing that she and others are working on making this a reality.
I received an ARC through NetGalley ; all opinions are my own.

[Karma · Rating 4 out of 5]

I mainly read this book because I have been hearing about empathy for ages and I wanted to learn more about it.

As the title promises, the author shares research backed and business proven empathy code. The seven ways to become a more empathetic person are all simple techniques that make total sense and are worth learning about. The handy acronym EMPATHY makes it easy to remember and therefore apply.

The thing that stood out for me (and probably the most important lesson I will take out of this book) is the difference between sympathy and empathy as well as the importance of 'Your Response' while being empathetic.

An easy 3.5 stars from me.

I received a free copy from Netgalley. This doesn't affect my review in any way.

[Lucia Gannon · Rating 2 out of 5]

A little too repetitive for me. Perhaps because it is one of many books I have read on empathy. would recommend it for a beginner who wanted to explore this subject.

[Lorena · Rating 4 out of 5]

After reading this book, I have a better understanding of empathy, or what the author prefers to call our empathic capacity. I appreciated learning about the different components of empathy and what factors affect how our empathic capacity fluctuates over time. There was a lot of interesting information for those wanting to understand different aspects of empathy. However, I wish there had been a chapter or appendix specifically devoted to what I need to do to improve my empathy, or perhaps a section at the end of each chapter summarizing recommended actions. Dr. Reiss does present her E.M.P.A.T.H.Y. tool, and there are some tips that can be gleaned throughout the text, but this is not primarily a self-help book.

There were interesting chapters on empathy in education, empathy online, and empathy in politics, as well as some discussions of empathy in healthcare. I would like to commend the author particularly for her balanced discussion in the politics chapter (she comments on the lack of empathy shown by members of both major parties). My favorite section was probably the chapter on self-empathy.

I appreciate that Dr. Reiss provided many references for each chapter, although in the ARC I reviewed, there were no notes or citations in the text, so it was often difficult to find the relevant reference. For example, when the author stated that studies have shown “there is an inverse relationship between power and empathy,” I would have loved to see the specific citations so it would be easier for me to review those studies to learn more. That problem may have been corrected in the published version.

I would recommend this book for those with an interest in psychology or neuroscience.

I was provided an unproofed ARC through NetGalley that I volunteered to review. Because I have not seen the final published version, I cannot comment on the final editing and formatting.

[Jef Sneider · Rating 4 out of 5]

As a physician, I have taught other physicians how to improve their communication skills in a course I designed with a social worker. The course was called "Close Encounters of the Clinical Kind" and we taught listening skills, mirroring body postures and dealing with difficult patients. Reading the Empathy Effect, I found myself reflecting back on my experiences, as Helen Reiss explains how her course on empathy for medical students and doctors can be shown to improve patient satisfaction and outcomes. The course which she has developed and the work she has done is very evidence driven.

For the most part, my familiarity with the concepts and practices being taught continued - until I reached the chapter on "Texts, screens and Digital Empathy." Here, Reiss uses her analysis of internet trolls and bullies, social media and screen time to help us understand these modern phenomena from her psychological point of view. The result is enlightening. Beyond social media, the book is current enough to discuss the 2016 election and both Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton from the perspective of empathy.

In the penultimate chapter, Reiss challenges even the most empathic individuals to understand those with mental health issues, the homeless, autistic individuals and LGBTQ "others." This is a challenge for all of us.

Finally, analysis turns inward, the author leads us to consider self empathy. I found the concept a bit slippery. In the end, I find it easier to focus on forgiveness, which is easier to understand than self empathy. Either way, self empathy leads to self forgiveness which can help to overcome many personal mental health issues, guilt and depression.

Perhaps because the author is evidence based in her analysis, I did not find much new information, although the chapter on the internet was very informative and gave me some new ways to understand social media and the behavior of certain bad actors on-line. In the end, the author tries to challenge the reader to understand empathy, to use empathy more often in social and work situations, to extend empathy to some very difficult groups of individuals, and to use self empathy for self improvement, all worthwhile goals.

[Jess Macallan · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book explores the various types of empathy, how we employ it in everyday life, and the obstacles we might face when showing our compassion to and for others. The author also highlights "empathy imposters" which are ways in which we think we're helping but we're actually causing harm, such as enablers and helicopter parents. I appreciated the evidence-based recommendations, and the call to expand our empathy beyond the people we relate most to.

Readers will learn about the author's E.M.P.A.T.H.Y. technique, which stands for Eye Contact, Muscle Facial Expression, Poster, Affect, Tone of Voice, Hearing, and Your Response. Even the most empathetic readers will learn something new. Chapter 12 explores the concept of self-empathy, which is something most of us likely don't consider when we think about how we can be more empathetic. The author makes a compelling argument for practicing self-empathy because it's correlated with traits like resilience, life satisfaction, and the ability to be more empathetic toward others.

I received an e-copy of this book via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

[Kate · Rating 5 out of 5]

I went to college initially planning to double major in neuroscience and psychology, so this book is right up my alley as it pulls from both fields. I thought the book was fascinating and thoroughly enjoyed every second of it.

I'm a momma to 4 young kids and it can be easy to forget the struggles they go through and call them silly, but this book helped remind me that they are not and are important to them. It is important we try to relate to and understand others rather than judging them and I have worked hard to teach my children this by example. They are important and I hope that helping others feel understood can help make them feel more positive and the world a better place.

It is really fascinating what we can do if we change our brain and this book shows one facet of it, improving emotional intelligence, with the 7 keys. I will be watching this author in hopes that more books are releases in the future!

[Bryan Hung · Rating 3 out of 5]

Quite a fascinating book on what empathy is, where it was quite shocking to observe how the notion of empathy pervades all spheres of life from our simple day to day interactions, to its portrayal in art. It was really cool to discover how empathy is interwoven in the human condition, being very much the currency of human interaction. Conversation empathy can be loosely described as the 7 keys of E.M.P.A.T.H.Y (eye contact, muscles of facial expression, posture, affect, tone of voice, hearing the whole person, Your response).

One of the biggest takeaways is discovering how empathy can be learnt. Another takeaway is how human empathy is very much a finite resource, where we can experience empathy fatigue, in which self-care or self-empathy is vital.

One of the largest drawbacks is the leftist agenda that permeates the book, where it some ways the author disguises these political ideas as science.

[NEON8L · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a very good review for empathy 101. The book could have benefited from a little more neuroscientific evidence (but there are plenty of references in the back). It should also have given some insight into how this framework of E.M.P.A.T.H.Y. has led to transformation in healthcare systems. A must read for most people, as the book shows how one can learn to practice empathy by a simple tool called E.M.P.A.T.H.Y. However, if you are well-read in the field, this book is not for you. (there is an interesting analysis how Trump has exploited the need for empathy resulting in today's distress in the U.S. society).

[Peter P. · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book just might be the definitive text when it comes to understanding Empathy and its place in work, life, and in relationships, including with oneself. It is literally chock filled with great story-telling, research, and academic studies to underscore why empathy is so important. Whether one believes empathy is a function of natural wiring at birth and/or a combination of nature/nurture, you will likely find this book to be a great resource. My own measure of great and engaging psychology books is the degree to which I have highlighted interesting segments. My copy is marked up as much as anything I have read since Kahneman's Thinking Fast And Slow.

[Elaine Moore · Rating 5 out of 5]

Everyone can improve on their sense of empathy, and Helen Riess, MD, teaches seminars to physicians and other health professionals on how to accomplish this. In her book, she teaches the reader the importance of empathy, especially in today's society where lashing out on social media has become routine. Highly recommended.

[Mary · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was an informative and thorough book on empathy. Riess is clear, direct, and compassionate as she discusses empathy in different forms and how it can be applied in different areas. Though there are some points where she seems to argue that rational thinking is supreme, it is in the context of understanding the power of combining emotional and cognitive empathy.

[Nathan · Rating 2 out of 5]

Maybe good a long time ago, now just covered lots of things many people are familiar with like difference between sympathy and empathy. Too general for me and not specific enough for a neuroscientist.

[Claire Coupland · Rating 3 out of 5]

An in-depth look at empathy, rooted in scientific research. A fascinating subject and a well written easy to read book. It offers techniques to becoming more empathetic and helps to differentiate between sympathy and empathy. If you want to know more about empathy, this is a great place to start.

[Ruksana · Rating 5 out of 5]

More and more data is showing that just as IQ is important so to is emotional intelligence. Leaders can not be true leaders if they do not possess empathy. This book through its stories shows how impactful empathy is and how it shouldn't be seen as a weak skill but a powerful one.

[Speranta · Rating 4 out of 5]

I liked the positive perspective on the reasons people show care for others. While it did not present something new for me, I thoroughly enjoyed the examples given as well as the practical advices on how one can expand his ability for understanding others.

[Brennan · Rating 3 out of 5]

I love her Ted Talk on the empathy - and I think she has uncovered some important principles. My continued theme of redundancy in psychology books applies here as well. The first several chapters are great though.

[Carol Oldham · Rating 4 out of 5]

Due to factors such as politics, social media, and tribalism empathy is losing ground in our culture. This book examines the issue thoroughly and is reassuring about how we as humans can improve the situation.

[Julie Mansfield · Rating 4 out of 5]

Important to read for people in all walks of life and occupations. Well done.

[Diane · Rating 5 out of 5]

Everyone who works with people, especially teachers, should read this book.

[Sarah Why · Rating 2 out of 5]

Half-way through the book looked the author up. I laughed when I learned she was blonde. The whole book sounds like a blonde joke.

[Susan]

Just couldn't do it. Maybe I'll try again some other time. Seems like it should be good.