Tom Ryan allowed me to borrow this book as I investigate Gestalt Therapy with the recommendation is was more readable than Frederick Perls and the warning that Gestalt is more something one does and that it does not translate easily in a Dummies Guide written form. The three touchstones of Gestalt Therapy are described as “contact, awareness, and experiment” (p 300).
I loved the following statement which seems to be the core of Gestalt. “The gestalt psychologist investigates the dynamics of the act of perceiving. They theorized that the perceiver was not merely a passive target for the sensory bombardment coming from his environment; rather, he structured and imposed order on his own perceptions (p 29)." What I get from this is that we have a hierarchy of stimulus that we pay attention too. So two people experiencing the same stimuli would have a different experience due to the ‘structure and order’ that they impose on the experience. So the Gestaltian therapist looks not just at what we are perceiving, but how we perceive.
I saw myself in things Kerri has said to me over the years in ‘Yes, but’ statements. Polster cites Perls saying when you hear “Yes, but”, only listen to what follows the ‘but’, and there is no need to pay attention to what is prior to the ‘but’. “If only” is a similar phrase from which you can ignore what follows. It is a statement of hopelessness (p 156). Kerri would point out I apologise with a ‘but’ and then I go on to justify what I had done wrong. There is no need for a ‘but’. This provided me with an awareness of what I have been doing for years. I have to learn to battle the ‘but’, however I rarely do ‘if only’.
Regarding the experimental aspect of Gestalt. A strategy is doing opposite (like the famous Seinfeld episode when George Costanza does the opposite of what he would usually do) within the safety and confines of a therapeutic group. The passive wall flower is encouraged to be an obnoxious interrupter. The person who is always cool and in control, is encouraged to be emotional and say things with feeling. The people get the experience of what it is like being beyond themselves. An interesting experiment for sure, but I am not sure I will ever do group therapy.
I had to remember it was written in 1974 and it is of its time, and not timeless. A number of the ‘therapies’ described would be socially and politically unacceptable, and perhaps even illegal today. For example: Polster writes of freeing a man from homosexual fantasies into a life of virile heterosexuality and marriage (194); "One patient in a moment of fury took my favourite ashtray and dash it to the floor, breaking it into unreconstructable fragments. I reached over and whacked her across the ass" (p 201); “Militant blacks, for example, have unfinished business and must release their fury whether or not improvements happen” (p 294). Pushing people away from their sexual impulses, spanking people, and allowing ‘ militant black people’ to release their fury (implied that they cannot help but be angry) would all be unacceptable suggestions in today's milieu.
Most egregious was the following ”I walked over, put my hands on her throat, and began choking her”. How much trust would you need to therapeutically choke someone? I just cannot imagine it. He then describes doing it again “As I went towards her with the intention of choking her again, Sue rose up before I could reach her. She lurched for my throat and began to grapple with me and soon we had wrestled down to the floor” (p 241). I love wrestling, but cannot imagine physical action being part of therapy. Polster acknowledged “Perhaps this enactment was risky and unprofessional. It was both”. Justified later by “The therapist’s professional responsibility is to engage and do whatever it takes to help her recover what she has lost on her way to his office” (p 242). People seemed to either trust or respect the competence of a therapist in a way I doubt is possible today. I can totally imagine Therapist’s of the era being able to justify having a sexual relationship with people, because ‘I needed to do whatever it took to them recover’. Those days are gone.
I am still struggling with Gestalt. I can see it’s influence on contemporary practise, but also the blind alleys it went down. I will not read anymore until next year. I am sure I will never describe myself as a Gestalt Therapist, but it is worth knowing and describes skills I am still working with.