In all honesty, I bought this to attend a signing, but I don't have kids of my own or any family members that are quite old enough yet for this book (They are 9 and 10; I would wait until 12 or 13). However, I do NOT want to give away something that I have not read myself, and could NOT have been more thrilled at what I hope will someday be a great gift to my nephews and nieces AND their parents.
This is an outstanding, very well-written book aimed at young adults that I believe every family should read together and then discuss. I truly wish that *my* parents could've given me this book, read it for themselves, and then we'd all talked about it. So if you're a parent struggling with how to talk to your teens about dating, sex, morality, promises, friendships, honesty, and betrayal and want them to be able to put their trust in you -- you owe it to yourselves (and your children) to read this book as a family. Otherwise, left to the advice of their friends, there's really no telling what kind of answers they'll come up with before they turn 18.
Wow. Where do I start? Well, I guess for starters, I was hooked on the first page. This, of course, is because of the familiar Atlanta locations mentioned -- but a poorly-written book set around the Decatur/Atlanta area wouldn't have held my interest.
I was compelled to keep reading because I wanted to be sure these kids didn't show up at my house and ask me deep questions about dating and promises and friendship and family and loyalty before I finished the book. I can't BEGIN to tell you how grateful I am that on page 227 Tabitha didn't pick up her phone and text "What should I do??" and then have that text come through on my phone. Because I still had 100 pages or so to go.
Naturally, I had to keep reading. By this point, I was HOOKED on the characters, their friendships, the memories of the awkwardness of dating and praying to EVERYTHING HOLY that I did NOT look like -- and this is a direct quote -- "an epileptic giraffe" on the dance floor.
I also read with a sense of regret, now that I'm well into my 40's, that I never was able to talk with my parents about dating, morality, and sex at that age. I vaguely remember around 12 years old that in health class, we were divided into groups of boys and girls, and one of the male teachers told the boys everything the boys already knew that was happening to their bodies (or about to happen) and that a female teacher told the girls the same thing.
But what all of us REALLY wanted to know about -- What did the OPPOSITE sex talk about that was so secret and so mysterious to us? 30 years on, I think a lot of us are still trying to figure those secrets out.
I'm guessing that in all likelihood, my parents never had "the talk" with me because either (a) They expected the school to answer my questions (b) They expected the church to keep me in line (c) they never got "the talk" themselves or (d) They had no idea how to answer my questions about what they did and what they struggled with when they were growing up and first started to date, and be HONEST that *they* experienced all of the same feelings and questions that *I* did.
Before my father died, we were just reaching the point where we could talk about anything. Then again, I guess since I'd been married for over two years by then, "The Talk" wasn't really necessary. I've pretty much given up hope that my Mom and I are ever going to have "The Talk." Then again -- maybe she's secretly hoping that I will sit down and have it with her because she has been waiting through SEVEN DECADES to get "The Talk." Who knows? Maybe it's not too late for me to give my Mom this book and then see if she wants to talk about it.
This book, however, is brilliantly written and one that I wish that I'd had 25 or 30 years ago. Does it give you all of the answers? No, but there are certain characters that you'll identify with. The characters that *I* identified with and that *you* may identify with may be COMPLETELY different. And in the end -- that is fine.
Whenever you have a family -- or a group of friends that are like family -- no one will ever see anything through your eyes but yourself. Sometimes you have to find your answers in your own way, and realize that it's not always about being "right" or "wrong," but about finding your own voice, your own truth -- and believing in that. Because sometimes your family (or family of friends) may be like a Norman Rockwell painting, and sometimes they're like a Pat Conroy dysfunctional family.
But as Terra so wisely said when she inscribed my book.........Always believe in yourself!