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Matchmaker Mysteries #1-2
Matchmaker Mysteries Books 1 & 2: An Affair to Dismember / Citizen Pain
An Affair to Dismember
Three months has been Gladie Burger’s limit when it comes to staying in one place. That’s why Gladie is more than a little skeptical when her Grandma Zelda—who is more than a little psychic—recruits her into the family’s matchmaking business in the quaint small town of Cannes, California. What’s more, Gladie is also highly unqualified, having a terrible track record with romance. Still, Zelda is convinced that her granddaughter has her clairvoyant “gift.” But when the going gets tough, Gladie wonders if this gift has a return policy.
When Zelda’s neighbor drops dead in his kitchen, Gladie is swept into his bizarre family’s drama. Despite warnings from the (distractingly gorgeous) chief of police to steer clear of his investigation, Gladie is out to prove that her neighbor’s death was murder. It’s not too long before she’s in way over her head—with the hunky police chief, a dysfunctional family full of possible killers, and yet another mysterious and handsome man, whose attentions she’s unable to ignore. Gladie is clearly being pursued—either by true love or by a murderer. Who will catch her first?
Citizen Pain
Since joining the family matchmaking business run by her eccentric and psychic Grandma Zelda, Gladie is always looking for love. But when an unbearable toothache knocks her out of commission and into the dentist’s chair, she prays only for relief. No such luck. Emerging from an anesthetic haze, Gladie awakes to find that not only is her tooth still throbbing, but her dentist is dead—and the lead suspect in the murder, office receptionist Belinda, just so happens to be Gladie’s first real client. Now it’s up to Gladie to find Belinda a man and keep her from being locked up behind bars.
As if that weren’t enough distraction, two gorgeous men are vying for Gladie’s attention: Spencer, the playboy chief of police, and Holden, Gladie’s secretive, gorgeously muscled neighbor. Still, Gladie’s not complaining about having a helping hand or two when the case leads her to a dangerously bizarre cult. She may have met her match—and if she’s not careful, it could be her last.
Three months has been Gladie Burger’s limit when it comes to staying in one place. That’s why Gladie is more than a little skeptical when her Grandma Zelda—who is more than a little psychic—recruits her into the family’s matchmaking business in the quaint small town of Cannes, California. What’s more, Gladie is also highly unqualified, having a terrible track record with romance. Still, Zelda is convinced that her granddaughter has her clairvoyant “gift.” But when the going gets tough, Gladie wonders if this gift has a return policy.
When Zelda’s neighbor drops dead in his kitchen, Gladie is swept into his bizarre family’s drama. Despite warnings from the (distractingly gorgeous) chief of police to steer clear of his investigation, Gladie is out to prove that her neighbor’s death was murder. It’s not too long before she’s in way over her head—with the hunky police chief, a dysfunctional family full of possible killers, and yet another mysterious and handsome man, whose attentions she’s unable to ignore. Gladie is clearly being pursued—either by true love or by a murderer. Who will catch her first?
Citizen Pain
Since joining the family matchmaking business run by her eccentric and psychic Grandma Zelda, Gladie is always looking for love. But when an unbearable toothache knocks her out of commission and into the dentist’s chair, she prays only for relief. No such luck. Emerging from an anesthetic haze, Gladie awakes to find that not only is her tooth still throbbing, but her dentist is dead—and the lead suspect in the murder, office receptionist Belinda, just so happens to be Gladie’s first real client. Now it’s up to Gladie to find Belinda a man and keep her from being locked up behind bars.
As if that weren’t enough distraction, two gorgeous men are vying for Gladie’s attention: Spencer, the playboy chief of police, and Holden, Gladie’s secretive, gorgeously muscled neighbor. Still, Gladie’s not complaining about having a helping hand or two when the case leads her to a dangerously bizarre cult. She may have met her match—and if she’s not careful, it could be her last.
648 pages, Kindle Edition
First published May 30, 2018
862 people are currently reading
401 people want to read
About the author
Elise Sax
84 books908 followersElise Sax worked as a journalist for fifteen years, mostly in Paris, France. She took a detour from journalism and became a private investigator before trying her hand at writing fiction. She lives in Southern California with her two sons. An Affair to Dismember is her first novel.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 56 reviews
September 23, 2018
I love Elise Sax's books. They're hilarious. In An Affair to Dismember Gladie's grandmother wants her to go into the family matchmaking business. She doesn't think it's a good idea but gives it a try anyway. How can she be a matchmaker when she doesn't know anything about romance? As she is learning the ropes of the business there is a murder across the street. Even though the police chief warned her to stay out of the investigation, she didn't. Between the handsome chief and the new hunky next-door neighbour, Gladie might just get some romance experience.
In Citizen Pain Gladie finds her dentist dead. Unfortunately, the prime suspect is his receptionist, Belinda, who is Gladie's first matchmaking client. As usual, I was chuckling throughout as Gladie tried to find the killer as well as a match for Belinda.
These mysteries are filled with lots of laughs and lots of love. Would one hundred percent recommend!
In Citizen Pain Gladie finds her dentist dead. Unfortunately, the prime suspect is his receptionist, Belinda, who is Gladie's first matchmaking client. As usual, I was chuckling throughout as Gladie tried to find the killer as well as a match for Belinda.
These mysteries are filled with lots of laughs and lots of love. Would one hundred percent recommend!
June 1, 2018
***Favorite Series***
Affair to Dismember is one of the funniest books I’ve read in a long time! Elise Sax hooked me with Gladie AKA “Pinky” and the gang in Cannes. Oh, and Spencer (sigh)! The laughter continues in Citizen Pain (which is my favorite in this series). With Gladie being a dead body magnet and the womanizing Spencer, you’ll be crying tears of laughter. Can’t get enough of this series. Off to read more!
Affair to Dismember is one of the funniest books I’ve read in a long time! Elise Sax hooked me with Gladie AKA “Pinky” and the gang in Cannes. Oh, and Spencer (sigh)! The laughter continues in Citizen Pain (which is my favorite in this series). With Gladie being a dead body magnet and the womanizing Spencer, you’ll be crying tears of laughter. Can’t get enough of this series. Off to read more!
July 20, 2018
Enjoyed An Affair to Dismember. It was catchy, funny and the story was good. I felt that perhaps I had come across another author in the genre of Janet Evanovich and looked forward to reading more of her books. If I was rating it alone, I would have given it 4 stars -
But then came Citizen Pain - sheer lunacy - I never read anything so convoluted, discombobulated, ridiculous and beyond the realm of any type or relation to reality. It didn't start off bad, but just became worse and worse, until I skimmed through it just so I could find out who the murderer was and that was grueling. Among other things, if the "aliens" were causing so much dissension and chaos that this small town's Police couldn't handle, then, AS IS NORMAL, the State Police would be called in, but, of course, that didn't happen, because that would have been logical. And, to top it off, in the end when she sees "Holden" (and the book calls him Holden) putting his duffle bag in his truck and goes down to talk to him, his name suddenly becomes "Spencer" and she winds up going into his house with him, which is next door to hers, which is Holden's house, but he is suddenly Spencer. So, who did she finally hook up with - Holden or Spencer? Your guess is as good as mine. Her conversation with him made it appear that it was Holden, but then she called him Spencer. Convoluted, just like the rest of the book.
I am amazed that the others that reviewed the book made no mention of this character switch, which, to my mind, says they really didn't read the book that well and that would account for them giving the book a good review. Needless to say, I won't be reading anymore of Elise Sax's books.
But then came Citizen Pain - sheer lunacy - I never read anything so convoluted, discombobulated, ridiculous and beyond the realm of any type or relation to reality. It didn't start off bad, but just became worse and worse, until I skimmed through it just so I could find out who the murderer was and that was grueling. Among other things, if the "aliens" were causing so much dissension and chaos that this small town's Police couldn't handle, then, AS IS NORMAL, the State Police would be called in, but, of course, that didn't happen, because that would have been logical. And, to top it off, in the end when she sees "Holden" (and the book calls him Holden) putting his duffle bag in his truck and goes down to talk to him, his name suddenly becomes "Spencer" and she winds up going into his house with him, which is next door to hers, which is Holden's house, but he is suddenly Spencer. So, who did she finally hook up with - Holden or Spencer? Your guess is as good as mine. Her conversation with him made it appear that it was Holden, but then she called him Spencer. Convoluted, just like the rest of the book.
I am amazed that the others that reviewed the book made no mention of this character switch, which, to my mind, says they really didn't read the book that well and that would account for them giving the book a good review. Needless to say, I won't be reading anymore of Elise Sax's books.
February 19, 2019
Gladie Burger returned to Cannes,California, to live w/ her grandmother Zelda, an agoraphobic matchmaker, b/c she can’t hold a job for longer than three months and her grandmother is sure that Gladie has “the gift,” and turns her into an apprentice matchmaker.
In Book 1, “An Affair to Dismember,” the Burgers’ neighbor is found dead in his kitchen. Was it an accident, or murder? Which of the colorful cast of grown children is the culprit? Gladie gets into embarrassing scrapes, outright danger, and romantic entanglements w/ the town’s new police chief and her hunky next-door neighbor, whom she is supposed to be matching up w/ someone other than herself.
The comparisons to Janet Evanovich’s Stephanie Plum are unavoidable w/ the pretty, but broke, heroine in over her head w/ her nosing into a murder investigation and the two men alternately having to save her. Her side kick Grandma is a junk-food junkie, just like Lula!
But it is still entertaining and I didn’t guess the identity of the killer until the end, always my mark for a satisfying mystery.
In Book 2, a strange, alien-expecting, cult descends upon Cannes. Gladie has a toothache and gets talked into visiting a local dentist. She wakes up still in the dentist’s chair hours later and finds the office deserted, except for the dead dentist who’s missing his face, and his assistant, knocked out by the assailant.
This book was even more entertaining that Book #1, w/ all the zany cultists, even if I did figure out the killer before I was told.
In Book 1, “An Affair to Dismember,” the Burgers’ neighbor is found dead in his kitchen. Was it an accident, or murder? Which of the colorful cast of grown children is the culprit? Gladie gets into embarrassing scrapes, outright danger, and romantic entanglements w/ the town’s new police chief and her hunky next-door neighbor, whom she is supposed to be matching up w/ someone other than herself.
The comparisons to Janet Evanovich’s Stephanie Plum are unavoidable w/ the pretty, but broke, heroine in over her head w/ her nosing into a murder investigation and the two men alternately having to save her. Her side kick Grandma is a junk-food junkie, just like Lula!
But it is still entertaining and I didn’t guess the identity of the killer until the end, always my mark for a satisfying mystery.
In Book 2, a strange, alien-expecting, cult descends upon Cannes. Gladie has a toothache and gets talked into visiting a local dentist. She wakes up still in the dentist’s chair hours later and finds the office deserted, except for the dead dentist who’s missing his face, and his assistant, knocked out by the assailant.
This book was even more entertaining that Book #1, w/ all the zany cultists, even if I did figure out the killer before I was told.
July 14, 2018
Not the Kindle Edition - it's an eBook on my Nook. No real copyright page or ISBN or anything.
An Affair to Dismember
Cute, but pretty silly by and large. The story was just good enough to hold my attention so I could finish it. Since I've paid for it, I'll probably read the second one, too. But I'm not impressed with the ditsy heroine.
Citizen Pain
The ditsy heroine is afraid of dentists, but finally the pain is too much and she unwillingly goes to the dentist. When she wakes up from the gas, she finds the dead dentist with his face missing. The primary suspect is the staff accountant, who happens to be Gladie's first matchmaking client. To top it off, a weird cult has invaded the city, insisting that the 'Arrival' is about to take place. Again, pretty silly, but enough story to get me through to the end. I probably won't buy any more of this series, although I may try a different one by the author.
An Affair to Dismember
Cute, but pretty silly by and large. The story was just good enough to hold my attention so I could finish it. Since I've paid for it, I'll probably read the second one, too. But I'm not impressed with the ditsy heroine.
Citizen Pain
The ditsy heroine is afraid of dentists, but finally the pain is too much and she unwillingly goes to the dentist. When she wakes up from the gas, she finds the dead dentist with his face missing. The primary suspect is the staff accountant, who happens to be Gladie's first matchmaking client. To top it off, a weird cult has invaded the city, insisting that the 'Arrival' is about to take place. Again, pretty silly, but enough story to get me through to the end. I probably won't buy any more of this series, although I may try a different one by the author.
June 5, 2019
Book 1-I was a disappointed in this book because it didn't seem to hang together as well as other books by this author. In a span of 4 days Gladie Burger goes from a mess of a frump with no life to a sexy glam girl who has 2 hot men fighting over her and has solved multiple murders. The characters are interesting but not as good as other series such as the Goodnight Mystery series.
Book 2-I wanted to fall in love with this series, but honestly, it is so much jumbled up nonsense. Crazy might be too mild of a word to describe it. While I admire the author's ability to come up with interesting characters and definitely unusual story lines, it's not a series I plan on investing any more time with in the future.
Book 2-I wanted to fall in love with this series, but honestly, it is so much jumbled up nonsense. Crazy might be too mild of a word to describe it. While I admire the author's ability to come up with interesting characters and definitely unusual story lines, it's not a series I plan on investing any more time with in the future.
June 17, 2022
So was it Holden or Spenser?
Probably a good read for some. Lots of silly hormonal antics that left me thinking I wasted 2 days believing the plot would actually get better.
I am glad this digital copy was free, only wasted free time and not money. I dropped from a basic 3 star “meh-“ to a two star- -“what the?..”after I needed to re-read the last two pages of book 2 a couple times and still wondered “whose house did she actual just go in”, was a paragraph or page missing, were names typo’d? I am all about solving mysteries, but this one left me flat. I hope
the stories are meatier in the next books for the Sax fans, they deserve a more if they stick with her and Gladys.
Probably a good read for some. Lots of silly hormonal antics that left me thinking I wasted 2 days believing the plot would actually get better.
I am glad this digital copy was free, only wasted free time and not money. I dropped from a basic 3 star “meh-“ to a two star- -“what the?..”after I needed to re-read the last two pages of book 2 a couple times and still wondered “whose house did she actual just go in”, was a paragraph or page missing, were names typo’d? I am all about solving mysteries, but this one left me flat. I hope
the stories are meatier in the next books for the Sax fans, they deserve a more if they stick with her and Gladys.
October 5, 2021
If murder mysteries can be called "fun," these are the very definition of that! In a small mountain town in CA, Gladie Burger and her grandmother Zelda try to make ends meet by matchmaking. Zelda has the skills, Gladie is learning. Sort of. Through mishaps and some situations that would make another person want to crawl in a hole and hide, Gladie tries her trade and falls into murder investigations without meaning to. She also falls for two men: a mystery lover of her dreams and a man who alternately irritates her and excites her. In each case, the reader can relish Gladie's choices of men and mayhem.
July 8, 2018
I loved these books! I'm not a fan of books written in the first person but these blew me away, so much so that I have read the whole series now. (Each book is a stand alone) The characters are well written. The scenes are very well done. The flagpole scene is one that comes to mind. I couldn't help laughing out loud (really) not just chuckling to myself. Even if you don't care for this genre (which I didn't think I did) or books written in the first person, or contemporary, or whatever, take a break from the usual and try these books, you will be glad you did.
July 10, 2018
It's cute and the lessons from her matchmaker grandmother are at times funny. It's still a cookie cutter cozy mystery complete with a loser heroine, who find her mojo when a murder is on her doorstep and the best looking guy in town despite complaining about how much weight she's gained.
I do wish that some of those heroine were at least a little bit more educated and not constantly down on their luck. Still, Glady Burger is mildly entertaining, even if the books are all filled with every single small town stereotype there is.
I do wish that some of those heroine were at least a little bit more educated and not constantly down on their luck. Still, Glady Burger is mildly entertaining, even if the books are all filled with every single small town stereotype there is.
September 22, 2018
Meh!!
The last 12 pages were very entertaining. I knew who did it around 60 percent through but had no idea why. The matchmaker quotes at the beginning of each chapter are cute. The main character is still an idiot. Still looking to be saved by a guy. Trying to solve a murder but never really thinking what to do if she actually discovers who the murderer is. Like what if the murderer tries to kill her - it simply never occurs to her to have a plan. She's to old to be tripping through life like it's an accident.
The last 12 pages were very entertaining. I knew who did it around 60 percent through but had no idea why. The matchmaker quotes at the beginning of each chapter are cute. The main character is still an idiot. Still looking to be saved by a guy. Trying to solve a murder but never really thinking what to do if she actually discovers who the murderer is. Like what if the murderer tries to kill her - it simply never occurs to her to have a plan. She's to old to be tripping through life like it's an accident.
October 25, 2018
Great until the end of book 2
I was enjoying the tension between Holden and Spencer and Gladie and grandma's advice is a hoot. I love her friends and the way they are they're always there for her. This is a series that I would like to continue reading. But I got totally lost at the end of the second book. The final chapter Gladie watches Holden put a bag into his truck, she goes over to his house and Spencer answers the door and she's having a sexy conversation with Spencer. I'm so confused.
I was enjoying the tension between Holden and Spencer and Gladie and grandma's advice is a hoot. I love her friends and the way they are they're always there for her. This is a series that I would like to continue reading. But I got totally lost at the end of the second book. The final chapter Gladie watches Holden put a bag into his truck, she goes over to his house and Spencer answers the door and she's having a sexy conversation with Spencer. I'm so confused.
August 1, 2018
I'm laughing so hard I'm crying
Very excited - I found another really good author! These books are great fun. Just a moment ago I was sitting here with tears I was laughing so hard. Lovable characters, interesting mysteries. Honestly she had me at the title, and it just got better and better. Thrilled to find this author has written many books - I will definitely be reading more!
Very excited - I found another really good author! These books are great fun. Just a moment ago I was sitting here with tears I was laughing so hard. Lovable characters, interesting mysteries. Honestly she had me at the title, and it just got better and better. Thrilled to find this author has written many books - I will definitely be reading more!
August 9, 2018
Starts off ok - with quirky characters and a cozy type mystery feel. However, the more I read, the more it was strikingly similar to evanovich’s Stephanie plum novels. After reading the in series for years, and tired of the same antics in that series, was disappointed to have uncovered the same tired basic premise to this series. First book was better than than the second, hence the two stars instead of one star.
July 6, 2018
It is funny, cute plot, and with Gladie feeling she is not psychic at all. When someone drops dead, she wonders if there is a return policy. She is over her head, wanting to prove it was murder, and with the chief of police. A lot bizarre happenings, in a family that is very unique. Amusing to read.
July 23, 2018
Entertaining Adventures of Gladys
Definitely chick lit. Lots of estrogen wafting around. Who killed the neighbor? Twists and turns and mentally unstable folks abound in the fictional Southern California town in eastern San Diego County.
In Book 2, who killed the dentist? And who’s after Gladys?
Definitely chick lit. Lots of estrogen wafting around. Who killed the neighbor? Twists and turns and mentally unstable folks abound in the fictional Southern California town in eastern San Diego County.
In Book 2, who killed the dentist? And who’s after Gladys?
July 28, 2018
Hilarious
I received this as a freebie and am so glad I did! Gladie is the main character who is supposed to be a matchmaker like her grandmother but instead finds dead bodies. This book is written in a very clever and funny way. I thoroughly enjoyed these books and highly recommend them. I can’t wait to read more by this author.
I received this as a freebie and am so glad I did! Gladie is the main character who is supposed to be a matchmaker like her grandmother but instead finds dead bodies. This book is written in a very clever and funny way. I thoroughly enjoyed these books and highly recommend them. I can’t wait to read more by this author.
August 26, 2018
The ending was confusing
The 2nd book ends with her neighbor coming home and she goes to his house but starts talking to Spencer? It's like she switched men in the middle of a seduction? Both the heroine and the writer can't seem to make up their minds on which man she goes after?
The 2nd book ends with her neighbor coming home and she goes to his house but starts talking to Spencer? It's like she switched men in the middle of a seduction? Both the heroine and the writer can't seem to make up their minds on which man she goes after?
August 27, 2018
Gladie went from job to job until her grandmother Zelda asked her to come and live with her so she could eventually take over her grandmother's matchmaking business. In the short time she has been at her grandmother's she has found herself involved with two murders, made two matches and has the hots for two men. Found myself laughing out loud. A fun light read.
February 8, 2019
Two good books to read
I enjoyed reading these two stories and really loved the characters. They were full of fun and definitely captured a lightness and humorous addition to the stories. The plots were easy to follow and read quickly. I liked all the humor and even enjoyed the mystery as well.
I enjoyed reading these two stories and really loved the characters. They were full of fun and definitely captured a lightness and humorous addition to the stories. The plots were easy to follow and read quickly. I liked all the humor and even enjoyed the mystery as well.
July 11, 2018
Fun, Quirky Characters
Gladie stumbles from discovery to discovery, leaving hilarious chaos in her wake. Her stories are highly entertaining, though the puzzles are not as complex or psychological as I tend to prefer them.
Gladie stumbles from discovery to discovery, leaving hilarious chaos in her wake. Her stories are highly entertaining, though the puzzles are not as complex or psychological as I tend to prefer them.
July 11, 2018
I absolutely love Elise Sax’s stories! Quirky characters, crazy happenings and escapism! These stories are not to be taken seriously, but for us to enjoy the humour and camaraderie of this crazy small town! Laugh out loud situations and some haphazard but effective matchmaking.
July 13, 2018
Funny and mysterious
I really enjoyed these first two books in the Matchmaker series. Gladie is supposed to become a matchmaker like her grandmother but it seems dead bodies keep finding her and she can't help but get involved in solving the crimes. Very entertaining.
I really enjoyed these first two books in the Matchmaker series. Gladie is supposed to become a matchmaker like her grandmother but it seems dead bodies keep finding her and she can't help but get involved in solving the crimes. Very entertaining.
July 16, 2018
Laugh, listen, then scream!
Funniest and most descriptive murder mystery ever. It's a belly laughing humor, but also deep caring from a grandma and her grandchild who seems to have her gift
Funniest and most descriptive murder mystery ever. It's a belly laughing humor, but also deep caring from a grandma and her grandchild who seems to have her gift
October 12, 2018
Too,too funny for words.
The most adorable character ,Gladie is also funny and clever with her best shots when angry. Best that I have read in a long time. I know you will enjoy this.
The most adorable character ,Gladie is also funny and clever with her best shots when angry. Best that I have read in a long time. I know you will enjoy this.
November 20, 2018
Funny
There is mystery here but far more humor. It's lighthearted and fun. There are some true laugh out loud moments. Enough romance to pique your curiosity but not so much to be cloying.
Ready for book 3.
There is mystery here but far more humor. It's lighthearted and fun. There are some true laugh out loud moments. Enough romance to pique your curiosity but not so much to be cloying.
Ready for book 3.
January 18, 2019
The first one was okay, a bit weird but I did like it. The second one was just too weird and really out there. I did figure out who the murderer was in both cases before it was revealed. I have no interest of reading anymore of her books
April 7, 2019
Laughing out loud!
Blacks is a matchmaker training and a real busybody. She seems to be drawn to mayhem. I'm this story she is trying to hookup with the guy next door but, the sheriff keeps getting in the way.
Blacks is a matchmaker training and a real busybody. She seems to be drawn to mayhem. I'm this story she is trying to hookup with the guy next door but, the sheriff keeps getting in the way.
August 31, 2021
I didn't know what to think of this but it came up on my Bookbub recommendations so I thought I would give it a try.
I am so glad I did. I haven't laughed so much in a long time. The stories are fun and the characters are great. I'm looking forward to reading more in the series.
I am so glad I did. I haven't laughed so much in a long time. The stories are fun and the characters are great. I'm looking forward to reading more in the series.
July 11, 2018
Great series- keeps you guessing until the end
Love the characters - leaves me wanting more. Intriguing plot with a twist of romance through out the book. Loved it:)
Love the characters - leaves me wanting more. Intriguing plot with a twist of romance through out the book. Loved it:)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 56 reviews